grow your mind

Your life is like your own craft; you create it to be how you’d like for it to be. You decide what it looks like. You decide how it turns out.
—  Nicole Addison @thepowerwithin

me @ those haters who’re trying to smear super junior members


Happy 18th Birthday Tarjei “I don’t want to adult” Sandvik Moe {24.05.1999}

Visualization Exercise: Energy Trees

Crystal grids are great! They have their own energy and are just plain cool to look at. Here’s an exercise to strengthen your crystal grids and visualization skills!

  1. When you have the grid laid out, imagine (with your eyes open OR closed) a sprout of energy blooming from the center crystal.
  2. Take deep breaths and focus on the sprout growing into a larger tree. You can “water” it with your own energy if you want. The tree is made of energy, so it can be any color you want, but I suggest the color to correspond with the intent of the grid.
  3. As the tree grows, see in your mind the roots extending into the outer crystals of the grid. They are what stabilizes it.
  4. When the tree is as big as you want, pause. Feel the tree radiating the energy you want it to have.
  5. Lastly, to add even more power, visualize ripe fruit growing on the branches. When the fruit gets big enough, it explodes in a burst of energy, boosting the intent of the grid and tree even more.
  6. Done! You can tend to the tree if you want, or you can get rid of it. You could even do this without crystals! Just draw some sigils in formation on a paper and grow the tree from them. The possibilities are endless!

I hope this was informative and inspirational! Have a blessed day ✨

You have to read this.

People will hate you for doing something you love. And most of the times, they will call you crazy just because your vision is different from what they are seeing. Neglect them. You have to surround yourself with people who supports you and believes in your world-changing capabilities. Continue searching for your higher purpose. You are and deserve more than just an average. Make the greatest impact on this generation. It is your turn to create amazing things.

But how can I do it? Where should I start?

Seize every opportunity. Work on your crazy ideas. Grow your vision and mind. You just need to set your foot forward to get started.

Regardless of who you think you are, you have someone in you that could bring change to our broken world. You have amazing talents to share. You are powerful, inspiring and capable. You have to set that man free.

—  E.J. Cenita
4 AM

Characters: Y/N (reader), Jared Padalecki, Jason (OMC), Rose (OMC)

Pairing: Jason (OMC) x Reader, Jared x Reader

Warnings: Postpartum Depression, Depression, Anxiety attacks, Dickbag husband, Cheating (not Jared), Horrible childhood, Lousy In-Laws      

Word Count: 2000ish

A/N: This is my entry for @luci-in-trenchcoats 2K Follower Challenge where my prompt was: “You’re gonna tell me everything”

It is also 1 out of my 13 entries for @mamapeterson / @mrs-squirrel-chester’s Album Fanfiction Challenge where I chose the album “Smoke and Mirrors” by Imagine Dragons. The song prompt for this fic is: It Comes Back To You

Thanks so much to amazing sweet (yet slightly grumpy) @mysupernaturalfics for betaing angst for me.

You felt as if there was a hole inside of you. The hole was nothing new. It had been there for days, weeks, months, even the depths of it wasn’t new. You had felt the deep dark nothingness inside, that threatened to swallow you once before and it scared the crap out of you. The feeling of being completely and utterly alone had never been more profound though and this time you knew it was true.

You had been the poor girl in the neighborhood growing up. The girl that everyone felt sorry for because her mom was a drunk and her dad was never around. You had never wanted people’s pity. It had infuriated you. You didn’t want people to feel sorry for you. You wanted them to see past your circumstances and see you. You didn’t want them to only give you the time a day because they felt bad for the girl in the holed shoes and size too small clothes that came from a thrift store.

You had been very young when you had decided you never wanted people to feel sorry for you ever again. You wanted a different life for yourself. You wanted a life, a big house, a husband and kids. You wanted all the things you never had growing up and you had fought tooth and nail to get it.

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Something Different

Request: Taehyung fluff where you guys are both in college and Taehyung sits behind you in class but never says anything, but one day he sees u dozing off in class and he decides to buy coffee after class

A/n: So I was planning a one shot, but you guys asked for a mini-series instead, and I’m such a hoe for Taehyung anyways. most of the request is in this chapter, but I have plans you guys… stick around -Kaitlin

Genre: Fluff
Members: Taehyung x Reader
Word Count: 1219

Masterlist | Next ↦

You’re normal, and you like living your normal, quiet life. But when you meet someone new and exciting, your tastes begin to change…

Originally posted by jxnhyungs

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Time again… time to sink… time to not think… time to let your mind sync… time to touch yourself slowly… time to worship and obey… time to stroke your mind away… time to relax and stare… no reason to have any care… it is time to be programmed again… time to let the thoughts go out… time to focus and let your submission out… time to relax and stare and STARE… Time again… time to sink… time to not think… time to let your mind sync… time to touch yourself slowly… time to worship and obey… time to stroke your mind away… time to relax and stare… no reason to have any care… it is time to be programmed again… time to let the thoughts go out… time to focus and let your submission out… time to relax and stare and STARE… Time again… time to sink… time to not think… time to let your mind sync… time to touch yourself slowly… time to worship and obey… time to stroke your mind away… time to relax and stare… no reason to have any care… it is time to be programmed again… time to let the thoughts go out… time to focus and let your submission out… time to relax and stare and STARE… Time to listen to Mistress LOVE… let your fantasies grow and take control… let your arousal grow… feel your mind sink… SINK sink… not a time to think… Time again… time to sink… time to not think… time to let your mind sync… time to touch yourself slowly… time to worship and obey… time to stroke your mind away… time to relax and stare… no reason to have any care… it is time to be programmed again… time to let the thoughts go out… time to focus and let your submission out… time to relax and stare and STARE… relax and let Mistress LOVE take you there… yes?

I find myself not quite understanding people who never clear people out of their lives. In this world where we connect so early now, and create social circles, open ourselves, our lives and our worlds to acquaintances who we then lose physical contact with, I can’t imagine that circle of people who once upon a time I vaguely knew still being able to watch in on my life without me knowing or realising. I like my submarine without portholes. I’m happy to not feel guilt or shame about deciding to close parts of my life off from certain people; to know and accept that if we’ve moved on from each other, it’s okay to make a clean break of it. That it’s not rude to decide that I don’t need someone I lived next door to when I was ten, or who’s the kid of a friend of my mum, to be able to see where I’m checking in to and what I’m having for lunch, and where I’m working, or if I’m not, and how I’m feeling inside.

I worry sometimes that in generations to come it will be harder to move on, to detach, to know or realise that it’s okay to pop some of the bubbles, that 1000 ‘friends’ who you’re neutral to or hate don’t need to be a presence in or on your life. We get older, we change, we grow, and that’s a positive thing. Transience liberates. Change frees. Choice empowers. So take a deep breath. And choose.

Passionate Hate - Ten (M)

A/N: I’m sorry, ft. fiance Ten


Word Count: 858

“Fuck off!”

You slammed the door in rage, unable to gaze upon his face any longer.
You heard something shatter outside of the door, irritated stomps echoing through the dark house.

Ten slammed the door, shoving his hands into his pockets gruffly as he made his way down the street, the cold wind howling in dismay.

You sunk to the floor, a broken sob escaping your trembling lips.

You hated him, yet you loved him.

Hours passed, your tears dried, your mind growing dreary as the dim clock mocked you.
You wondered about him.

Where is he?
What’s he doing?
Will he come back?

Your thoughts were interrupted as you heard the door, quick steps making their way toward your room.
You scrambled from the floor, bewildered.

Ten swung the door open, his chest heaving as if he had sprinted.

“I’m sorry-”

Tugging him by the collar of his shirt, you melded your lips together desperately. His bewilderment soon vanished, his desperate hands wandering across your body, greedily pulling you closer as he deepened the kiss.
Tears flowed down your cheeks, their saline taste mingling with his sweet essence.
You broke away, peppering kisses over his skin messily. Your hearts swirled with guilt, the unhealthy nature of your relationship obvious.

“Kiss me,” you begged, drawing Ten from his dark thoughts.

He held your gaze. He noticed the despair and desperation hidden beneath the adoration your gaze held, a mirror of his very own.
He leant down slowly, capturing your lips in an apologetic manner.
Suddenly, he drew back, his rough hands turning you around suddenly, pushing you onto the mattress. His hands moved to your bottoms, thrusting them down swiftly. His bulge pressed to your panties as he leant over you.

“I hate you,” he murmured, his hot breath caressing the shell of your ear sensually.

“I need you,” you whined.

He stood, his jeans falling to his ankles similarly to your own. He cursed, his blunt nails digging into your soft skin lustfully, his frustration replaced with adoration. He hated himself for loving you so much. Unable to wander through the depths of his mind any longer, he shoved his briefs down, his member aching at the sight of you. Your cheek pressed to the cool sheets, your fists fisting the soft sheets. A hand fell to your back, two fingers brushing your panties aside before prodding at your entrance. Your back bowed as he easily sheathed his two fingers, your warm essence smearing along his knuckles. Slowly, he thrust his fingers into you, his lips parted as your tight walls constricted around his lithe fingers. His slow pumps soon grew aggressive, your frame rocking with each thrust.
A high, wanton moan left you, your thighs trembling in anticipation as the coil within you bound tightly.

“I’m close-” you croaked, gasping sporadically as the coil within you burst, wave after wave of ecstasy rendering you speechless.

Removing his fingers swiftly, he guided his member’s swollen tip to your entrance, sheathing himself. His breathing grew ragged, his frame falling over your own. His barbaric nature was replaced by a sweet and loving one. His breaths sounded by your ear, his hand ghosting under your shirt, his hips shallowly rocking against your own slowly. He moaned lowly, his forehead pressing to your shoulder, his soft hair tickling your neck gently.
A whimper escaped you as he groped your breast beneath your shirt, his calloused fingers brushing over your sensitive bud brashly.
You called out to him quietly.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated, his hips drew back before thrusting shallowly.

His fervent pace displayed his desperation, the dark room echoed with pants and low moans, a sensual symphony.
He groaned your name loudly before chanting quietly, his hips stuttering, roughly snapping to meet your own. His hand abandoned your breast, instead slithering down the front of your panties, his fingers massaging your swollen clit sloppily.
He came, his hand stilling temporarily as he grimaced.

“Shit-” he murmured, slouching against you.

His warm breaths once again caressed your ear, his wary gaze watching you carefully. He studied the way your lips parted as he applied more pressure.

“More,” you panted.

He obeyed, rubbing quick circles into you rapidly. Your voice rose as your frame tensed, your high once again approaching.
He quietly encouraged you through your release, whispering in your ear sultrily.

You awoke to an empty bed; the vast bed making your heart drown in sorrow.

Lounging in the chair, Ten sighed gently. He looked from the rooftop, the sun rising over the bustling city slowly. Running a hand through his hair lazily, he pursed his lips.

His phone rang loudly, tearing him from his thoughts.

“Where are you?” you inquired quietly.

He sighed once again.

“Let’s break it off.”

Time seemed to stop, the ring on your finger glistening mockingly.

“Last night-”

Ten interrupted you, “-was a mistake.”

“-there was love, I could feel it,” you finished.

Ten shook his head, his forlorn gaze sweeping over the skyline slowly.

The line went dead, your words cut off.

- Admin Finn

Lavender Peace Spell

° 1 lavender candle
° 3 dried sprigs of lavender [peace, healing, relieves depression, calming]
° 1 white sachet [all purpose, peace, protection]
° 1 crystal (blue lace agate [peace, calmness], desert rose [peace, tranquility, protection], carnelian [peace, eases depression], celestite [peace, calming, grounding], green calcite [peace, centering, healing, love, spirituality, protection], kunzite [peace of mind, still the soul, protection], quartz [all purpose] or selenite [peace, tranquility, balance with the soul])
° Incense (lavender or sandalwood [all purpose, negativity removal, peace])

Point in time:
° whenever you want an extra boost of peace :)

1. Evoke the magical circle.
2. Ignite the incense and meditate a few moments over your intention while you enjoy the pleasant scent of your incense until you are relaxed and feel prepared for the next steps.
3. Light the candle with the words:

“Bright light of lavender,
Stand by me and help me with my request for peace.”

4. Take the sprigs of lavender and remove the lavender blossoms carefully.
5. Pick a few blossoms up and scatter them over the candle. While you do that, chant three times:

“Sweet Lavender, plant of peace, healing and calming.
Something is still disturbing my concord.
This is not what I wish to see,
With thy aid, my inner unity shall grow,
So I may live in peace.”

6. Close your eyes. Imagine the flame of the candle to turn into the colour of lavender and let it grow in your mind. Wrap yourself with the created light and feel the peace tingling down from your head to your toes and from your toes up to your head. Hold the picture as long as you can and the feeling won’t disappear when you let the visualization go.
7. Take the rest of the blossoms into your hand. Say:

Thee sent me peace for now.
Therefore, I thank thee.”

8. Put the blossoms into your sachet.
9. Now, pick up your chosen crystal. Hold it in your hand. Then, close your eyes and say:

“My intention is crystal clear.
May this dwell in the foreseeable future.
Peace, peace, peace!
This is what I wish to see. So mote it be.”

10. Let your eyes remain close. Let some of your gained energy of peace flow into your crystal.
11. Now, put the crystal in the sachet as well.
12. Reverse the circle.
13. Let the incense burn down by itself. After that you can put the ashes into the sachet, too.
14. Let the candle burn as long as you are able to supervise it. Then, douse the candle. You can either reuse it after cleaning it or put it into the sachet but this depends on your personal preference.
15. Carry the sachet with you or hide it somewhere in your house where no one can find it.
16. Repeat the ritual after a while.

[You don’t need to follow each step exactly. Do what feels natural to you, so you’re your energy may flow constantly. Own Spell]

Peter Parker Imagine

Requested: Anonymous

Imagine: hey, so idk if you’ve seen CACW (pretty sure u have cuz.. srry that’s a dumb question) anyways, my fave part is the airplane scene. and i was wondering if you could write a peter parker imagine where ur ant man (well u have his suit so u can shrink and stuff) and that one part where he lands on caps shield and then grows and kicks peter. and when you kick him, his mask comes off and u continue to shrink and beat him up and stuff? and can u have like a conversation between him and the reader? thx

A/N: whoa nonny, that’s legit my fave part in the movie too! twinners :D

Warning: fluff

You finally made it to the top of the shield, breathing heavily into your helmet.

‘’Goodness, how does Scott do this.. He makes it all look so easy.’’ you sigh, catching your breath.

You were using Scott’s suit for this fight, he’s trained with you before with it, showing you the basics and stuff. But so far, it was tiring you out pretty quickly. You looked up at the gigantic spider-man above you. He soon looked down and saw you on the shield.

‘’Hey! Why is there a tiny–’’

‘’Surprise!’’ you shout, pressing the button, making you go back into normal size.

As you went back into normal size, you did a back flip and kicked spider-man right in the face. You could hear him yelp in pain as you kicked him. You landed swiftly on the ground and then looked back at spider-man. He was groaning in pain, but you saw that your kick somehow removed the mask off of his face. As he turned around, your heart skipped a beat.

He was cute.

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In The Woods Somewhere

Request: Ok so, It starts off with me getting kidnapped by shield, and then they take me to do the same operation on me as they did to Captain America. When I wake up, the first thing I do is break out of their base. While I’m running away, the send Cap, Clint, and Bucky after me. I think I run into some woods, get shot by Clint a couple of times until I collapse and pass out. I don’t remember much after that, but if you could somehow twist a relationship that forms with Bucky that would be cool.- submitted from @superwholockmarkiplier

Bucky X Reader

Word Count: 3190 (haha.. whoops!)

Warnings: None? Readers gets sedated, mentions of violence?

A/N: OKAY. AGAIN. Sorry this took so damn long!! I really hope that this is alright.. I tried my hardest.. It kinda got a little away from me.. That’s why it’s so long.. So.. yeah.. Hopefully it’s alright. This is kinda different from my usual so feedback would be great!! xo

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Table Games (Mark Tuan)

Originally posted by soybeantree

This is based on a poem by Sarah Kay called Table Games. I’ll put the link in the end because it’ll give you spoilers to the story if you watch it before hand, although I do recommend you watch it if you have the time.

Word Count: 1,583

Genre: Fluff, Angst

A/N:I’m sorry if some of the details didn’t match up, it doesn’t make sense for Got7 to be “coming back home” to New York, hell I there aren’t even Whole Food’s in Korea (to my knowledge) but that’s what Sarah Kay wrote. I hope you do not mind XD This was for the anon who requested a Mark Tuan Angst, I hope you like it! Thank you all for reading ^—^ |Link to the original poem

In restaurants out favorite game was to touch an object on the table and casually offer a pun into the existing conversation

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Saudade: Ch16

It had been so long since you kissed Brendon, you almost forgot what breathing was. Your head was spinning and it felt like everything else was fading around you, the sensation of his body and lips pressed against yours making you feel alive, the recklessness and desperation of how he held you and kissed you only making you want more. When he pulled away he took a deep breath, still staring at you, both of you not speaking any words. Adrenaline was rushing through your veins, your heart racing beyond belief, the craving in your mind growing stronger and stronger. You were about to kiss him again when he took a step back, arms resting to his sides, swallowing uncomfortably. “No,” he shook his head. “I can’t do this.”

“Why not?” you wondered. “Come on Brendon, I thought we were already over the entire back and forth thing, let’s just do this-”

“I can’t just do this!” he shouted. “Okay?” Your body froze at how loudly his words were, terrified of what he might do next. He closed his eyes, lowering his voice. “If I kiss you one more time y/n, I’m afraid I won’t be able to stop.”

“Then don’t stop,” you begged, closing the space between you and taking a step closer to him. “I need this so fucking bad, you don’t understand. Please don’t act like you don’t want this too.”

“That’s it,” he tightened his jaw, grabbing you by the shoulders and pushing you back, taking you by surprise, shoving you into the couch. “You want to be a little slut, then I’ll treat you like one.” Your body made contact with the cushions, startling you at the force he had used to shove you back, your heart racing at the ever-growing frustration and lust in his eyes.

“Bren-” you began to protest but he climbed on top of you, pressing you back into the seat.

“Last I checked, that’s not what you call me,” he warned. “Be a good girl for daddy and maybe then I won’t have to treat you like such a whore.” He gripped your hips tight, legs straddling you, leaning in close to your face.

“I’m sorry, daddy,” you apologized, locking eyes with him and watching his breath hitch at your response. “It won’t happen again.”

“You’re a fucking slut, you know that?” he chuckled darkly, eyeing you up and down. “God I can’t wait to feel that pretty little cunt of yours around my cock again. I bet you’re so tight. I mean, Josh goes easy on you anyways, you probably don’t even work up a sweat when you’re fucking him, huh?”

“Stop talking,” you whined. “I need you to fuck me.”

“Whatever you say, babygirl,” he smirked, kissing you roughly and trailing his hands behind your back, fumbling with the zipper before tugging it down, the fabric of the dress falling off your body. He chuckled at the sight of you not wearing a bra or panties. “Now who might you have done that for?”

“You,” you blushed.

“Sweetheart, you didn’t even know I was going to be here,” he clicked his tongue. “Tell me the truth.”

“Maybe I just wanted to be naughty,” you admitted, eyes glancing up to meet his for a split second, sensing his amusement.

“You really are a filthy slut, aren’t you?” he sighed. “God, if only Josh could see you now.”

“Enough about Josh,” you insisted, annoyed at how much he brought up Josh’s name, but also feeling the slightest pang of guilt. “This is all about me and you, okay?”

When you kissed Brendon again, you were sliding off his suit, unbuttoning his shirt, unbuckling his belt, unzipping his pants, and tugging down his boxers. You were craving for his body to be against yours, for him to fuck you so good. When you were both finally naked you caught Brendon with a slight smile on his face, as if a nostalgic remembrance of what once was or how things used to be, that small desire that had been pestering his mind finally fulfilled. “I really did miss you, sweetheart,” he mumbled, lining his cock up towards your dripping wet pussy, glancing up into your eyes, hesitating for a moment. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah,” you bit down on your lower lip, looking up to meet his gaze. “Come on, don’t tease me any longer.”

“But maybe we should-” he began but you had already grabbed him by the shoulders and tugged him towards you, gasping as he slid inside you, your fingernails instinctively digging into the flesh of his back, watching his body tense at the sudden movement.

“Enough talking,” you sighed, starting to roll your hips up to meet his, both of your bodies relaxing, your legs wrapping around his waist, lowering your mouth down to whisper in his ear. “Just fuck me already.”

“Oh god,” Brendon moaned, rocking back and forth inside of you. “I’ve n-never done this before, you know, sex without a condom.”

“Mmm, I’m sure,” you murmured, closing your eyes and trailing your hands down from his shoulders to his chest.

“It feels so fucking good,” he gasped, continuing to thrust into you. “Your body is unreal.”

“Don’t hold back,” you insisted as he went faster, his hands with a firm grip on your breasts, giving them a squeeze and making a moan escape your mouth. “Fuck me as hard as you can daddy.” You bit down hard on your lower lip, him moving in and out, making your body tremble, your orgasm slowly creeping on as he pushed you to the edge.

“Shit I’m going to-” he began to say but you pulled him closer to you, your bodies clinging onto each other, both of you moaning and shaking as he came inside you, the new sensation making euphoria rush through your veins. You came, your orgasm making your walls tighten around his cock, only making the bliss feel twice as amazing. “Holy fuck.”

“God,” you hummed, riding out your orgasm for as long as possible before he finally pulled out of you, cum spilling from between your legs, dripping down your thighs.

“You’re such a pretty mess for me,” he smirked, eyeing you up and down. “Fuck.” He scooped you up so you were standing in front of the couch with him, kissing you rough, messy, desperate. When he pulled away, a worried expression crossed his face for a moment, looking at you.

“What’s on your mind?” you wondered, cupping his face.

“Are you uh, are you going to be okay?” he asked awkwardly. “I mean with-”

“Yeah,” you reassured, rolling your eyes. “Don’t stress about that.”

“Okay,” he took a deep breath. “Let’s get cleaned up baby and then get back out there.”

Brendon was really sweet and caring, picking you up in his arms and setting you on the counter of the dressing room, taking a wet towel and cleaning you off gently, telling you how much he loved and missed that beautiful body of yours, how well he’d take care of you if you were his, how he had been dying to fuck you ever since he left. After the two of you were cleaned off and redressed, you agreed to keep all of this strictly between the both of you, exchanging numbers once again, but swearing only to contact each other as long as Josh was very far away and not able to figure out whatsoever. It was sort of thrilling, the entire experience, especially keeping Brendon a secret. But somehow, within you, you didn’t want it to be. You wanted to be able to not lie about it, to just tell people, to shove Josh aside and take Brendon for yourself. But Josh didn’t deserve that, he didn’t deserve any of this. So you owed it to him to stay with him. He didn’t do anything wrong, and the least you could do was fake it in order to make him happy. You couldn’t even imagine what Josh would do if he found out. Thoughts of the nightmare from before lingered in your mind and you fought to push them out, instead, looking up at Brendon, who was adjusting his tie. “You look amazing,” you gave a small smile, fixing your now very messy hair into a simple ponytail. Maybe you could tell Josh you were just having a panic attack and freaked out or something.

“Me?” Brendon raised an eyebrow. “Oh honey, you better look in the mirror.”

“Nah,” you shook your head. “You’d outdo me any day.”

“I love you,” he laughed, wrapping his arms around your waist and kissing your lips softly. “I love you so fucking much.”

“I love you,” you whispered, hugging him tight.

“Now let’s get out there and hope we didn’t miss too much,” he cringed, taking you by the hand and leading you out of the room. You closed the door, beginning to walk down the hall when you bumped into someone.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry I didn’t-” you froze when the person looked up, eyes locked with yours.

“Y/n?” Jenna questioned, glancing from you to Brendon, to both of you holding hands, back up to you. “What the hell?”

“I can explain,” you quickly reassured, letting go of Brendon’s hand, but she just stared at you, horrified.

“Look, y/n was feeling queasy, she went to go get a breath of fresh air, and she fainted,” Brendon lied. “I saw her fall and I caught her, took her to that dressing room you saw us come out of. I let her relax, got her some water, made sure she was okay. That was all.”

“That was all,” Jenna repeated, crossing her arms over her chest. “I’ve been looking for you for the past half hour, y/n. As for you Mr. Urie, everyone’s been looking for you. Congratulations, you won the rock album of the year award.”

“Oh,” Brendon blinked. “Wow, that’s uh, that’s great.”

“If you don’t mind, I’m going to escort y/n back to her seat,” Jenna sighed. “We’ll see you at the afterparty.”

“Yep, sure thing,” Brendon flashed a toothy grin. “See you later, y/n! I hope you feel better.”

“Bye,” you gave a small smile, meanwhile, Jenna practically dragged you back to your seat.

She didn’t say anything, which you were half paranoid, half thankful for. Maybe she actually bought Brendon’s lie and left it at that. Or maybe she knew about everything, all of this, and just decided not to tell you about what she planned to do about it. Maybe she would tell Tyler, who would obviously tell Josh. On second thought, that wouldn’t be so bad after all, would it? That meant you could be with Brendon, stay with him forever, smoke as much weed and drink as much alcohol as your heart desired, lounge on the couch with Bogart and Penny, dip your feet in the pool and listen to him work in the studio… it sounded like a dream come true.

“Hey babe,” Josh’s voice reeled you back into reality. “How are you doing?”

“Better,” you nodded your head, unable to suppress the simper that appeared on your lips with thoughts of your little day dream. “A lot better.”

“We didn’t win the award,” he sighed, giving a small shrug. “But we’ll get em next year, right?”

“Right,” you agreed.

“Brendon won,” he explained. “And I have to admit, his album was pretty great. I hear he’s already working on his next one too, got a couple songs done, that’s insane. Me and Ty are barely even finished with one for the next record.”

“Don’t worry about it, just give it time,” you reassured. “I mean, I bet it’s easier for Brendon to work on songs anyway, having a studio in his backyard and everything.”

“H-how did you know that?” Josh raised an eyebrow.

“Know what?” you laughed, confused.

“The studio in his house,” he responded.

“Oh,” your face went red. “Uh, I read an article like last month or whatever about the houses of rock stars, Alternative Press or Rock Sound or something. His house was in it, I thought it was pretty cool. I thought maybe you and Tyler could do a similar set up in his garage.”

“Yeah,” Josh mumbled, losing interest in the conversation. “I guess that’d be cool.”

The rest of the award show, Tyler ended up talking to Josh about some new music video that dropped and how they could manipulate similar techniques in some future music videos of their own. Jenna was engrossed in her Instagram account and cheering on the winners of the other categories. And you, well, you kept trying to ignore the fact that Brendon was still staring at you for the rest of the night. You tried your best not to glance back as much, if at all, especially now that Jenna probably knew something was up. But it was irresistible not to, especially how every so often when you did turn your head, he would shoot you a wink or a smile. When the awards show was finally over and you all got up from your seats to leave, you decided to take one last look at Brendon, giggling as he blew you a kiss, blush unwillingly rising to your face. You were so caught up in the simple gesture that you almost didn’t even notice when Jenna nudged your arm, narrowing her eyes.

“Something happened in the dressing room, didn’t it?” Jenna inquired.

“What?” you played dumb.

“Come on,” she insisted. “You’ve been staring at each other for the entire rest of the award show, and you were bright red when you were in the hallway, and don’t think I didn’t see you two holding hands.”

“It’s nothing, just a stupid boy I guess,” you looked down at your feet.

“I know he’s your celebrity crush and you’re probably all frazzled since you finally got to meet him, but it doesn’t mean you have to have your head in the clouds all day,” she teased. “Come on, Josh is going to know something’s up.”

“I don’t have my head in the clouds,” you rolled your eyes. “I’m just sort of spaced out.”

“Same thing,” she argued. “What did you do? You were gone for half an hour.”

“Nothing,” you persisted.

“Did you guys…” her eyes went wide and you held your breath, terrified for what she was about to say next. “Did you kiss?”

“What?” you couldn’t help but turn bright red.

“I knew it,” she laughed. “Oh my god.”

“Jenna,” you became nervous, looking around for Josh. Maybe if you just kept it at that, just one kiss, she’d finally drop the whole thing. “Be quiet about it.”

“Holy crap y/n, did he kiss you on the lips?” she gave raised eyebrows. “What did you talk about? Are you going to tell Josh? Did anything else happen?”

“It was nothing,” you sighed. “Look, I told him I maybe had a teeny tiny little crush on him, and he gave me a kiss on the cheek, that’s it. He helped me get hydrated and caught me when I fainted and fell. That’s it. He talked me down, then led me out of the dressing room, and that’s when we found you.”

“Okay,” she decided. “I won’t tell Josh. But that’s hella cute though.”

“I guess,” you shrugged, the blush in your cheeks finally subsiding.

“Oh well, I think Ty and me are going to go. I’ll see you at the afterparty!” she waved goodbye as Tyler took her hand, giving you a small wave as well, and then both of them walked away.

“Ready to go?” Josh wondered, startling you from behind.

“Huh? Oh yeah,” you swallowed uncomfortably.

“Hey! Over here! Josh Dun! Y/n!” a flood of paparazzi and interviewers rushed towards you and Josh as you moved away from the building. “We’ve got questions! We want to know the truth!”

“Do you mind?” Josh asked.

“No, go ahead,” you decided.

“I can answer a couple,” Josh chuckled. “But just a few and then we’ll get out of here.”

“They aren’t for you, Mr. Dun,” the interviewers shook their head. “They’re for y/n.”

“Oh,” Josh’s eyes widened, him caught by surprise, chuckling. “Well feel free to ask. They’re all yours, babe.”

“Questions?” you laughed nervously. “For me?”

“We have evidence!” an interviewer handed you a paper, several photos printed out on it, depicting you tugging Brendon down the aisle, shoving him in the dressing room, and then holding his hand while exiting, Jenna talking to you both. There were at least five, blown up to a good proportion, and you felt sick to your stomach knowing Josh was right beside you. “Explain what’s going on! Why were you with Brendon Urie? What happened in the dressing room? What was Jenna asking you?”

“Yeah…” Josh drew out the word slowly, looking at you, confused. “We need to go.”

“Wait, Mr. Dun-” they insisted, but Josh shook his head. “We’re leaving, now.”

Josh took your hand, guiding you out of the paparazzi and interviewers, even shoving a few of them away, then taking you down the street, grip on your hand growing tighter as you got towards the car. He didn’t say anything, just stayed silent, until you were both in your seat, the key inserted into the ignition, but he didn’t start the car. You were terrified, heart racing, palms sweaty, scared to death. He knew, there was no way he didn’t know, especially after Jenna, and the pictures. “I thought you were going to get a breath of fresh air alone,” he murmured.

“I was,” you insisted.

“Those pictures say otherwise,” he argued.

“I can explain,” you promised. “Jenna can too, she was there, you know the media Josh, they love drama and they like to exaggerate things.”

“Look, I know you’d never cheat on me,” he sighed. “I’m not even worried about Brendon, okay? I trust you. I can’t even imagine you kissing another guy, I know you’re not like that.” You grew silent at his words. “I’m just saying, next time you need to catch a breath, take me with you, yeah? I can help. Or I’ll try to at least. I don’t need the press ruining your reputation, babe. I could’ve gone with you to get a drink of water or whatever, not some stranger. I don’t mean to scare you, I just want to help you. Understand?”

“Yeah,” you whispered, relief washing over you.

“Now come on,” he laughed, easing the tension in the air. “We’ve got an afterparty to go to!”

Why do people think that personality can not change?

Well, as a child I’ve always been a shy, but hyperactive, messy person. It seems like I’ve always been on both sides, you know? After a few traumas I became very isolated, tried to let go more - because it was what I wanted deep down - but it ends up going back inside. I 1did the MBTI test and identified myself with the INFP type and soon face the so-called Fi-Si loop. I started to go deeper into theory and realized that there is a certain conflict where they talk between the type change or not. Many people think they do not change, and I also believed that I did not change and stopped trying to be something I was not, until, after a while, I noticed that the external influence I had in the past had returned and I was highly dissatisfied with My solitude and caution. I unconsciously started thinking about implementation possibilities, let go of caution and negative experiences and applied all these ideas in the external world (Ne-Te loop?). I began to study calculations, social psychology, and things that made me active, at this time I did not even remember much about the MBTI, so the subject came back and I remembered that I changed a lot in relation to what I was. I became more active and less cautious. Before I cared about caution, now I care more about the speed of acting. My hyperactivity and need for recognition has grown, and consequently I have become more confident and communicative.

Note: I’m 4w3 sp/sx

MBTI theory suggests that we dwell primarily in our dominant function in childhood, start development of our auxiliary function in our teen years, develop our tertiary function in our 20′s’30′s and finally ‘get a handle’ on our inferior after that. I believe in change as an individual but not brain function change.

Will you experience change throughout your life? Absolutely.

Will you be the same person at 34 that you were at 14? Hell no.

You can change, grow, expand your mind, excel in different ways, and become the best possible version (or worst) of yourself, experiencing enormous change as an individual and in your circumstances, and still process information in the same pattern as you have done all along – just with greater confidence, intelligence, and maturity. A mature well-rounded INFP looks and acts nothing like an immature INFP.

Lack of change means stagnation. That is never good for anyone, but especially toxic for a Ne, whose natural desire is adaptation, transformation, and pursuing a more idealized Self. It sounds as if you decided you did not like who you were, and chose to do something about it – to step outside your comfort zone, to put yourself out there, to study more, to gain confidence and defeat your shyness. This proves you are a strong, determined person, in control over your responses to life. You should be proud.

Remember to do things at the speed they need; do not rush through the important things just to get them finished. That’s a classic symptom of low Te: the haste to finish something, and neglecting the process (a major inferior Si problem).

Do not rule out the possibility of being an ENFP who is developing Te, either. Many shy ENFPs mistype as INFPs because Ne-doms need about 60/40 (60% external stimulation, 40% alone time to process), so they really ARE ambiverts.

- ENFP Mod

ETA: taralynnehall: I think there is some room for change in the event of trauma, drug abuse, mental illness, etc. Those things can change brain chemistry, which can, in turn, change the way your brain processes information, which is essentially what MBTI measures.