groom & clean

anonymous asked:

Woah, when did I follow this? Eh, doesn't matter, I love me my eeveelutions! What kind of things would a Glaceon do to keep their fur clean?

Glaceons groom their fur like most pokémon, but their icy tongue covers the fur in a very very thin layer of ice, giving it a nice shine, and it keeps them cool during hot days! 

It also makes it easier to get around

I’m approaching it like I’m a novice myself, and I’m not trying to be an expert. I’m not a novice, but I’m definitely not as schooled as some of the people that I meet and some of the people that I know. I’m hoping that people always watch the show and feel like they’re on [the trips] with me. My mistakes are genuine mistakes, and my goofy stuff that I do, that’s me, so I’m not trying to be very polished. I also didn’t want hair and makeup to be on the show, and I didn’t want wardrobe to be on the show. I wanted every time I’m sweaty and out in the middle of the desert, to take off my helmet and look like I’m sweaty. I wanted people to feel like they were there, and if I took off my helmet and then you cut to me and I’m perfectly groomed and clean it just wouldn’t make sense. I really wanted it to be authentic, you know? So you’re like, ‘Yeah, you have helmet hair in every scene of the show.’ I’m a dude. I like to be sweaty, and I like it to be real. I like to have some mud all over me, and I like the little cuts and stuff on my chin.
— 

Norman Reedus, Yahoo.com (15/Jul/2016)

Did you imagine so many different kinds of people would be drawn to Ride?

how to stay happy

are my intentions good? will my decisions unneccessarily hurt others? am i speaking kindly to others? am i validating other people’s feelings and listening? have i had enough water, food, and sunshine today? what have i done to earn a sense of accomplishment for today? have i answered “how am i feeling today?” with something other than food/drugs/alcohol? did i tell my family i love them? are my needs and wants clearly catergorized? did i shower and put on clothes? have i been to doctors and dentists? are my animals well loved and fed and groomed? is my house clean enough to be functional for everyone who lives here? am i looking for a new way to be happier? always.

Grooming Tips for All My Niggas

Alright, y’all

You’re nasty. Not tryna start nothing, but y’all are, it’s just a fact of nature, niggas is nasty. We smell, look, taste and feel nasty in our natural states. And ain’t nobody tyna get hollered on by a nasty ass nigga. But it’s all good, ya boy got you, we gonna get you looking smelling and feeling fresh as hell so you can go hit the club, or hit the bed. Let’s hit it.

To get started, you gonna need some tunes. I prefer something that’s gonna get you thinking about that one you tryna talk to, like some Badu or Sade, but my homeboy be swearing by Drake, so choose what you gonna wanna kick it with for an hour or two.

Alright, let’s hit it.

1.      We gonna take care of your face first, ‘cause this is gonna take some good time. Y’all know that shaving ain’t no punk for a nigga. We naturally got thick and wavy/curly facial hair, which has trouble growing up through the skin. Any nigga who shaves knows the hell that is your face bumping up, especially under your chin. So go hit the store. Walgreens is gonna have a majority of what you need. Wherever you go though, hit it up and get you some witch hazel and some aloe vera. Less than then bones for the both. Also, get you a double edge safety razor. It’s about $25 for one, and it’ll last you forever. If you a stingy/broke nigga, grab a bag of the single blade Bic disposables, but trust me, save up for the safety razor. It’s hella good for that Black skin and hair, and a nigga don’t wanna be bumpy (and red, for my lightskin niggas) tryna step. For shaving cream, you either need to get that professional shit with a brush, or else get you some olive oil (yo momma/sister/girl got some for her hair, I’m sure). Also, a bar of black soap is made for Black skin and’ll leave you feeling fresh and clean. Ask the Black Muslims, the guys at your barbershop, or hit up AfricaImports.com for some at a reasonable price, because it’s cheap. Go on and lather your face up real good with the soap, and wash with a washcloth in your sink. The soap lathers brown, so you’ll need to wipe down the sink area when you’re done, ain’t nobody wanna find some brown mess all over your sink. Rinse your face off and get your shaving cream or the olive oil, and slather it on your beard. Because there’s only one blade on your razor, you’ll have an easy ass time getting straight sideburns and smooth designs if you want them, but also there won’t be a lot of pull on your beard that leads to bumping. Just be careful with the safety razor, cause a nigga slip once and you got a nice gash to go show off at the spot. Rinse whatever remainders off of your face. The olive oil will have your face feeling smooth. That’s what you looking for. Ain’t nobody wanna lay up with a rough face-having nigga all up on them (PROTIP though, always but a barrier between your face and someone else when you laying up together. Beard stubble is rougher than a mug on someone else’s skin). PROTIP FOR THE BALDING NIGGAS! Shave it off. Niggas look good bald, but not with patchy ass hair.

2.      Hit the showers. You need to wash it all, my dude. Get you washcloth and clean that shit up. Be real thorough especially in your private areas. Ain’t nobody wanna experience yo dick cheese or smell your ass, so especially if your expecting company in that area, clean it out thoroughly. Especially pay some attention to your ass. Get all around, in the hair if you got some, and even rinse out the first little bit of your butt hole. Ain’t no shame in being clean, my dude. Bring a pair of scissors in the shower with you: I prefer the tiny ones with rounded points that they sell for elementary school kids at target or whatever, so you don’t have to worry about stabbing yourself. You don’t need to take everything off, but if you think something’s a little uneven or out of control, trim it up. Your dick looking like Shorty from Scary Movie 2, but you want Scary Movie 1, dude. If your armpits or ass looking thick as the jungle, consider that too, but it’s not as necessary. Rinse off well though, you don’t want no random stray pubes drifting about. Also, scrub your feet down, including between your toes. Wash your hair: hair naturally keeps odour, so if you ain’t washed it in a while you finna be musty, so get it right.

3.      Pat dry, and PUT ON SOME GODDAMN LOTION. For real, ain’t nobody wanna touch up on a dry ass nigga all day (or all night).

4.      Let’s talk about your feet. They’re nasty. Here’s how you can fix that. You have two options. Number one, go get you a pedicure. Ain’t no shame, hell I got some play today sitting in the chair while my girl Nancy lotioned me up, buffed me out and gave me a clear coat for $20. You need a recommendation in Colorado, I got you. Otherwise, go get you some high-quality nail clippers and a nail file. Clip yourself down neat and even, use the file if need be. Now, slather your feet in lotion, I mean slather, and put on some socks until your ready to go. Once you’re ready to walk out the door, change your socks and wipe off the extra lotion. This should keep you mostly moist and smooth down there for a bit. Then your feet won’t be knicking and getting all up on your sheets and your partners legs. If you’re extra crusty, I recommend Crisco instead of lotion on your feet.

5.      Let’s work on your scent. Now you can keep all of those cans of Axe laying around in case you need something fast or you’re not looking to impress on the daily, but anytime you’re looking to smell fresh and sexy, I’mma recommend you get yourself a professional fragrance. Best way to do this is to first learn about notes, what you like, what you don’t like, and what smells good on you. Hit up Fragrantica.com and browse around a little bit, or go over to the department store in the mall and find the little men’s fragrance area. Smell a couple, first sprayed in the air, then on yourself (don’t mix). If you find something online your not sure about, order a decant (they’re small bottles that you can spend less than ten dollars on). Find a fragrance that both you and your target audience will think is fire. Give yourself three sprays: neck/chest area, back of neck, wrists.

6.      If you really wanna be a fly ass nigga, get yo colours right. Know what colours go good together. Look at some models at note the colours. Look at some ladies and note the colours (a lot of them have got this on point better than us, but some don’t, so take a grain of salt with that shit). Here’s a tip: opposites are good. Go find a colour wheel and look at the opposites. Red and green, blue and orange, yellow and purple, etc. Don’t be that nigga who only got one colour scheme either, or that nigga who only wanna wear black, grey and blue. Think about which colours look good with your skin, and make sure your jewellery matches too. For example, I don’t like my skin in gold jewellery or bright orange. I be killing ‘em in silver and turquoise though. Guess what I be stocking up on. You got it.

7.      Brush your teeth. BRUSH YOUR TONGUE YOU MUSTY NIGGA. That shit’s uncomfortable, but it’ll have you smelling right for hours.

8.      Hit the club/date/party/bedroom/whatever. Talk right. Treat people right. Smell fresh. Taste fresh. Feel fresh. Look fresh.

♉ How to attract a Taurus ♉
  • Let them take their time with things
  • Be patient with them
  • Take things slowly, don’t try to rush into things
  • Be down to earth
  • Allow them to make decisions on their own
  • Keep yourself clean, groomed and practice good hygiene
  • Be faithful and loyal
  • Show that you are interested in a long term relationship
  • Show that you are trustworthy and reliable
  • Do not take too big of risks when in a relationship with them
  • Be protective of them (not in a clingy way)
  • Do not change or make plans at last minute, be persistent
  • Spoil them once in a while
  • Be practical and realistic 
  • Be good with your money and have good spending habits
  • Take them out to places with great food
How to clean: BRUSHES

The next thing we are going to learn, my children, is how to clean brushes. Thanks to @pokeswap for the suggestion. 

So just imagine this, you live in Southern California, where there is no need for covered arenas because it basically never rains. But suddenly this “El Nino” decides to storm on in and flood your arenas. Well, there’s nothing you can really do at the barn today, right?

WRONG! In these dark times, while your beautiful jumping arena becomes a watering hole for the local wildlife, I invite you to be awesome and get shit done. One thing that many of us don’t do enough is clean our brushes. (This is especially important if you are using the same grooming brushes on multiple horses). 

Cleaning brushes is relatively simple, but it can be an annoying task when you need those brushes to actually groom horses. So I suggest cleaning your brushes on a day when you don’t need them, or setting a couple aside so you can still groom horses. 

I fill up a LARGE bucket (one that you don’t use for feeding) with water, warm if possible, and then add bleach (get a gallon at the dollar store and keep it in your tack room because bleach is bae), a few cups, no exact measurement. After rinsing your brushes with a hose, then put them in the bucket, making sure that the bristles are in the water. (I like to put my curry combs, mane brushes and hoofpicks in there too). Let it soak for an hour or so. Then dump the bucket (not by any ponies), rinse the brushes with a hose. If they are super nasty, then maybe do a second soak. Once the brushes are clean, rinse them out with a hose, and lay them out to dry. Make sure they are fully dried before putting them into a tack trunk or tack box. 

For extra soft/expensive brushes I use a shedding blade to get the hair and dust out (gently), then lightly spray with a bleach and water solution to disinfect. (1 part bleach to 3 parts water).

Bleach is great.

Science teacher

This is my first story so it might be a little bad but i hope you enjoy it!
***

I was fourteen-years old and in the ninth grade. Mr. Jovelo had been my science teacher when I was in the sixth, seventh and eighth grade.

Mr. Jovelo was in his thirties and very tall, 6'4. He was always well-groomed, clean cut, attractive and well built. He had very dark black hair, that was always neatly trimmed, brown eyes, full lips and an always ready smile. And a bubble but that made all the girls swoon, it was a lot more difficult for a horny, gay teen-age boy.

Mr. Jovelo had us do an group assigment with three other people. Usually i went with my friends and started the questions on the board. “Ok class, you have to answer in complete sentences” he said, finishing writing up the last question.

Now Mr. Jovelo is usually never careful were he sits, he’s sat on more kids in his life than chairs. Mr. Jovelo always says its an “accident” but i feel like he does it on purpose. I’ve never been sat by him before, but with a butt like that i wouldnt mind.

My shoulder partner called over Mr. Jovelo and came over to my side. My partners,including myself, didnt notice him coming and he just sat on me. I froze, i didnt know what to do but to enjoy it.

Im usually quiet in the group so my partners didnt notice i was under him, but he did. Mr jovelo started wiggling around and bouncing up and down a little. I instantly got hard and almost came on the spot. Finally Mr. Jovelo realized and got up.“Sorry i didnt see you there..” he said with a smirk, “but must i say you’re pretty comfortable to sit on” and winked.

“Uh, a-anyways we need help with question four…” i said. He helped us find the answer and left. Throughout the whole assignment i couldnt stop thinking what he said, you’re very comfortable to sit on. While i was replaying the moment in my head i forgot we were going over the questions

“Jake…JAKE” Mr. Jovelo almost shouted. I was frozen, embarresed by my daydreaming i could speak. “Fine if you won’t answer,I’ll see you after class”

***
“So jake why didn’t you answer the question today?” Mr. Jovelo said. “I-i was distracted” i answered. He got up from his seat and approached me, “ Was it because i sat on you?” he said with a smile that makes everyone melt inside. I didnt answer unsure of what to say.

“I felt your little friend was a little excited wasnt he? I bet you would like me to sit on you again wouldn’t you?” Mr. Jovelo said patting his bubble butt.

“I guess i would” i said without thinking. He laughed and sat back down in his chair “Take a seat i want to give you something”. I sat in the chair infront of him. Mr. Jovelo pulled out a plastic cup and poured in a liquid i couldnt identify.

Taking this as a sign i drank it, it was sweet with a bitter after taste. “What was that?” i asked. A smirk quickly appeared on his face. “Oh you’ll find out eventually”. What did he mean by that? Suddenly my vision clouded, the last thing i saw was Mr. Jovelo mouth, can’t wait till we get home.

***

I woke up in a strange room. I looked around but it was too dark to see. Where am i? I tried to get up but i couldn’t. My body couldn’t move and the air was kind of stuffy. Suddenly the weight on me lifts off and a wave of fresh air hits me. “Good morning sleepy head” a familiar voice said, “ Do you enjoy the view” he said showing off his giant bubble butt. Ive never seen a butt so huge, his underwear seemed to be at the point of breaking wanting to release those two huge mounds of meat

Once my vision cleared i saw Mr. Jovelo standing over me, he was a giant from my point of view. “Whats going on Mr. Jovelo?” i asked confused.

“Remeber that drink i gave you? It shrunk you down to 4 tiny little inches, now you’re a little ant compared to me.” A rush of emotions ran over me, a little more turn on than scared and confused.

“What about my family and my friends? They’ll worried sick about me, i have to go back to my normal size please” i said. Laughing he said “ Oh don’t worry about that i told your family you were sent off to a program in London for a couple of years, to will improve your science skills and they ate that up like hungry wolfs” he said confident in his plan.

I stood there unable to speak. I couldn’t think or even function with all this information. “But why me? Why not anyone else?”

He got face to face with me “Oh thats easy, ive known you liked my ass for years,and youre the smartest in the class so it made sense to pick you for my made up story” he said. But there was still something bugging me more than anything

“What am i even doing here in your house anyways Mr. Jovelo?”. He released a big burp that almost knocked me down. “ Ive been working on that drink for years, mixing differnet chemicals to shrink a human completely and once it was done i had to test it out on someone” he laughed and continued “ I always needed an ass slave to worship every inch of my ass and you seemed to fit what i looked in for a slave”.

My heart almost left my body. I was taken away from my family,friends and my whole life to become an ass slave.

“Mr. Jovelo this is crazy!! You have to-” i was interrupted by another burp that succsefully knocked me down this time.

“Oh Jake do you think i care? Now if you dont mind its time for me to watch tv shows” he said standing up.

His ass blocked the light and all i could see was his ass eating at his underwear and a sweat line going down his beautiful crack. I stood there in fear and lust seeing his ass approach closer and closer.

“Oh and jake?” he said stopping “ Dont call me Mr. Jovelo anymore… Call me master from now on, and you’ll be addressed as slave"  and with that final sentence his bubble butt engulfed my tiny body

***

I’ve lost track of the time under his sweaty ass. I didnt have any trouble breathing but man it reaked really bad in there. Soon after i realized my tiny face was on his asshole.

Great. This is what i have to do untill i die, living servicing my science teacher.

In the middle of my thought he let out a wet fart. “I hope you dont mind, I’ve had at least 60 deviled eggs for dinner today and they make me very gassy” he said as he farted once more, longer than the last one

The smell was unbearable i couldnt stand it. I almost threw up each time i inhaled. “Slave i want you to purify my farts, i don’t want to smell a thing when i fart, slave and if i do you’ll experience the worst punishment of smells in your life” he said farting again.

Afraid and not wanting to face this punishment i inhaled his fart, gagging each time. “Thats how its done slave very well”

***

Hours went by and countless farts were released. “Ahh i think i might hit the hay slave”

He got up and fished me out from in between his ass and set me by the counter. Dazzed i didnt move much. “I just wanted to see you one more time before bed slave” he said charmingly

“Hope you enjoyed our little session today, because its about to get a lot better” he said

He grabbed me and started moving me towards his ass. “Mr. Jovelo please dont!”
He stopped suddenly and brought me close to his face. “I told you to call me master, slave.” he said, “ since i feel nice today and this is your first day you’ll face something somewhat similar”

He set me down and pulled of his boxer briefs. I was mesmerized by the sight, his ass cheeks were bouncing with freedom and his cock and balls were huge. He left the room and came back with a thong

“What is that?!” I asked. He picked me up and placed me in the little pocket designed for a shruken person. “Oh its something to help you remember to call me master”

He put on the thong, he spread apart his ass cheeks so i would meet his asshole faster Once he finally got my face on his asshole he let go of his mounds closing me in a fart oven.


“Do you like it? I designed it myself. Now everytime i fart you can smell purify the fart! Aren’t you glad to have such a generous master?” he said farting

“This is inhumane-” i was cut off by a wet fart. “I don’t want anyone smelling any farts tomorrow slave, we’ll be going to school where you’ll sniff my farts all day without anyone knowing but me” Mr. Jovelo i mean… My master said

“Well nap time slave!” he said and layed down.
***
I couldn’t sleep through night with my master farting every 5 minutes, like a ticking bomb.
Tomorrow wouldnt be any better

The Unexpected Arrival: Part Seven

The Unexpected Arrival: Part Seven

This story was inspired by Acid/C2ndy2c1d (http://c2ndy2c1d.tumblr.com) and her undying loyalty for one of my favorite cartoons, Courage the Cowardly Dog. And since she’s shown so many wonderful drawings to help sate my cravings, I thought I would write something in exchange.

This particular scenario is inspired by her awesome comic:

http://c2ndy2c1d.tumblr.com/post/69459342190/yeah-probably-its-not-the-best-idea-to-have-the

Rating: K (for Katz~)

Summary: After Muriel and Eustace’s passing, the Middle of Nowhere finally seems too empty for Courage. But some familiar, frightening faces will soon change all of that.

Keep reading

My ultimate drarry headcannons

- Draco is elegant and refined from being raised as a pure-blood, he plays piano and violin and speaks French and can ballroom dance with his eyes closed, he drinks champagne and dresses in designer robes

- Draco is always clean and groomed, his clothes are always perfect and his smile is always charming, he knows just what to say when and to who to gain favours and worm his way into anyone’s good graces, his good looks don’t hurt things either

- Draco is quiet and studious, he’s resourceful and a deep thinker, he’s a light sleeper and likes things just so, his routine is his way of life and his public image is everything. Then we add Harry to that mix

- With Harry Draco is open and free, his smile is wide and dorky and shows all his teeth, he snorts when he laughs and blows bubbles into his milkshake through his straw because he’s a total dork and he’s allowed to be with Harry

- Harry brings out his wild side, they go exploring in the woods together and Draco is always the first to climb up a tree or dive into a river because it’s fun and life is fun and he wants to experience it with Harry, he’s constantly swinging upside from tree branches while Harry’s trying to read and always falling asleep in his lap in the sun

- When he’s home alone with Harry he wears knitted sweaters and jeans and always steals Harry’s winter jackets to curl up in, and once he starts getting his honorary Weasley jumpers at Christmas he wears it to bed every night until the next year because he loves to feel loved

- At home Harry cooks but Draco loves to create a mess in the kitchen and is constantly trying to cook the Muggle way and he’s actually pretty good at baking cakes and he makes one for Harry each year for his birthday, and Draco is the one who loves to go grocery shopping with Harry because there’s just something so domestic about it that reminds him he has a family now and he loves it

- Harry’s there when he needs to cry about his parents when he returns from their lunchtime meetings and they’ve argued again, Harry lets him rant about his coworkers in the Magical Law Enforcement Department and their pure-blood values, and Draco’s always there when Harry needs to talk about whatever horror he witness on his latest Auror mission with Ron, and he’s inches away from hexing someone when Harry comes home from work and is upset by someone’s comment about his sexuality or choice in partners

- Draco loves nothing more than dragging Harry to pure-blood dinner parties, half to watch him flounder like a guppie out of water and half because Harry looks real good in designer robes and it’s so cute when Harry tries his best to fit into Draco’s world

- Draco loves to see Harry socializing with his parents at these parties, and talking with his friends, and he especially loves the jealous look in his eyes when he dances with Pansy a bit too long or leans too close to Blaise when reaching for his next drink

- But as much as Draco loves to see Harry at his socialite parties, Harry loves to see Draco at HIS parties even more. He loves watching Draco sitting in his rumpled robes downing as many Firewhiskey’s as he can, drinking competitions with Ron or George, playing stupid Muggle games with Hermione and always gloating when he wins. Harry loves when Ginny bring in karaoke and Draco is the CHAMPION of karaoke and this is his jam don’t mess with this song! 

- What Harry loves the most though, is after the parties when Draco is tired beyond belief but he’s happy and smiling and just glowing and Harry has his breath taken away as he watches him undress and slide into bed with him, cuddling up next to him because Draco is the biggest teddy bear on the planet and he loves to cuddle

- Draco’s always up long before Harry, but he rarely gets up until Harry’s awake unless he has work, and when Harry does wake up he always kisses him senseless and that usually leads to morning sex. Harry will always make Draco his favourite tea in the morning and in the winter times he’ll clutch the hot cup in his cold hands and kiss the tip of Harry’s frozen nose over the steam of the tea and sit at the kitchen counter watching him cook breakfast making sexual comments about Harry’s fine arse whenever he turns around

- What Harry loves most about Draco is that Draco never asks, he never talks about anything personal if he has the impression Harry isn’t comfortable telling him. Draco will never ask about the horrors of the war or the pressure of being the Chosen One, and when Harry just needs quiet and peace Draco will be there to let him curl up in his lap and stroke his hair while he reads the paper and asks no questions. 

- What Draco loves most about Harry is that he makes him smile, and Draco hasn’t smiled in a long long time, Harry’s smile is precious to him and it takes his breath way each time he sees it, and he’s always trying to see it again. Draco loves the way Harry smells when he buries his face into his shirt, he loves how warm the boy always is and he loves how Harry pretends he doesn’t notice Draco crying when Harry presses kisses to the Dark Mark during sex

- Harry loves when Draco presses his lips to his scar just before bed, murmuring that he loves him, no matter how moody he is or how angry at Harry he’ll always kiss that scar and tell him he loves him and if Draco ever stopped then Harry would know it was over, but he never stops

2

Ma’Nene - The ceremony of cleaning corpses , is celebrated annually by the residents of Toraja , Indonesia. The relatives of the dead awaken the body , using black magic. They’re cleaned , clothed , groomed and repairs will be made to the coffin.The body then walks around the province , in a line with others and their deceased family members. Once the ceremony is over they’re walked back to their resting place , they’re removed from the spell and laid to rest for another year.

9

SPRING CLEANING: NEW GROOMING AND HAIR EDITORIAL FOR OUT MAGAZINE PHOTOGRAPHED BY ARNALDO ANAYA-LUCCA STARRING HENRIK FALLENIUS,EMILIO FLORES,JASON BOYCE AND MATT WATERS.HAIR AND GROOMING BY ENRICO MARIOTTI.

after you realize that when ciel died sebastian:

  1. dressed him in funeral clothing
  2. carried his body out of the demon island
  3. returned to the manor 
  4. cleaned and groomed his corpse regularly to preserve him
  5. tucked him in at night
  6. read story books as bedtime stories to his dead body
  7. had one sided conversations with ciel’s body
  8. keeps his body protected in the padded suitcase

i bet he even made tea and cake just in case, just to go cold and unconsumed, much like the boy’s stolen soul

like my heart just broke bc of sebastian’s vain attempts of bringing ciel back before searching out the ring