grocery store rap

Reader x Daveed Diggs

“Foot”note: This is set before Hamilton actually opens, to begin with

Fact: you are awesome

Word Count: about 7,300

P.S.: I literally spent an hour and a half fighting with Grammarly and the internet to get this finished up for you AND I was doing this from about 10:30 to midnight after I have taken some serious knock me out cough medicne. It might suck at the end where I wrote the last of it after taking the medicine.

requested “I digg you” pun in a daveed x reader by @ocean-marina

(whoops! Thought I had already done the keep reading thing!  I’m sorry!!!)

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New Video: Grocery Store Rap - Hollywood Ending (Too funny. These guys are awesome!)

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Check out this awesome…..Grocery Store Rap? hahahaha! 

anonymous asked:

Hey.. I'm auditioning for smtm5 got any tips on how to sound fresh like a stalk of celery lightly drizzled on by the overhead cleansers from an organic produce section of an adequate local grocery store like sabor.. My rapping is usually very on point. Like a ballerina but u kno, not afraid to seek out opinion and be open minded, peace

i cant believe min yoongi is in my inbox

1D- He finds out that you can rap

Niall: You were all alone, waiting for something interesting to happen. Your boyfriend, Niall, was on tour halfway across the world, and you were lonely and bored. You decided to invite your friends over, and have a karaoke party. Their were about ten of you, and because you all Wanted to sing different songs, you each took turns singing. You are not the best rapper, but for karaoke, you will happily sing.  You turned on one of your favorite songs, by Nicki Minaj, High school. You had to warm up for this song though, because you were going to be rapping. Later, after you finished with ‘High School’, it was your turn to sing again. this time you chose My chick bad, by Nicki Minaj and Ludacris and you started rapping again. By the time that you were done with your second song, you heard clapping, coming from the front door. Apparently, you were so loud, you didn’t hear Niall come through the door. He got home early, because he missed you and wanted to spend the rest of the week with you. He was so impressed by your voice and rapping, because you refused to sing in front of him, and now that he has finally heard your rapping and singing, he won’t stop complimenting you, which always made you blush. 

Harry: You were doing your normal duties, around the house, to keep you preoccupied while your boyfriend, Harry was at the studio. He was working on his newest album, while you were washing the dishes, cleaning the counters, and cooking dinner for the two of you for when he comes home. He had just left for the studio about two hours ago, so you thought that since no one was with you, you should put on your music. About ten songs later, your favorite song of all time came on, Confident, by Justin Bieber. You knew every word of the song and you were so excited to rap to the song without someone hearing you.—-(Tattoos, piercings and she just learned to twerk She ain’t got a heart or an ass, just her brains Gotta ass cause her ass on a learning curve And she gotta earn the berb, I mean burn the word That’s only legal with a doctors note Real deep pockets like a doctors coat Stay fitted like Diddy, here back tryna rock the boat She the first mate wanna rock the boat She never forget to ride like a bicycle She like planes, trains, chains and I suppose It goes her, blank, blank, and rock & roll She say, “I know, honey bunny that’s a funny thing." Watch her twerk for a goodfella She money dance with the money team), You finally finished the song , to be applauded by Harry, who just arrived, with the other boys for dinner. everyone was staring at you wide eyed and confused.

Liam: You were going to the shower, so happy to be able to relieve stress with rapping and warm water. Liam was in another room, probably still on the phone with the boys, in the family room, many rooms away from the bathroom. You didn’t think he would be able to hear you because he was so deep in conversation about who knows what. You had an opportunity, to sing your heart out in the shower where you probably couldn’t be heard. You were wrong, and you figured this out, when Liam somehow got into the bathroom, after his talk with the boys. You were rapping your favorite part of crooked smile, by J. Cole and TLC.–(They tell me I should fix my grill cause I got money now I ain’t gonna’ sit around and front like I ain’t thought about it A perfect smile is more appealing but it’s funny how My shit is crooked look at how far I done got without it I keep my twisted grill, just to show the kids it’s real We ain’t picture perfect but we worth the picture still I got smart, I got rich, and I got bitches still), was the part that you were singing, until you were interrupted by Liam, who joined you in the shower, unexpectedly, and he was going on and on and on about how amazing your rapping was.

Zayn: Va Va Voom by Nicki Minaj, was playing on the radio in the car, while you were driving home from the grocery store. You were rapping all the parts, so well, but no one knew that you had the talent to rap. Apparently, While you were rapping the part,— (just met a boy, just met a boy when He could become my little problem 'Cause he look like he modeling clothes in Dublin So I think that he gettin’ that Green like Goblin Hear through the grape vine that he hang low), you accidentally butt dialed your boyfriend, Zayn. He was listening to the whole thing on speaker with all the boys. You didn’t find out about, until later that day, when he came home with the other boys, and immediately started to question your ability to rap. they were so in awe of your talent, they couldn’t believe that someone so small and cute, could cuss and rap the dirty parts so perfectly.

Louis: You were not the best rapper ever, but there was one song that you could rap to, at any time, it was so easy for you to rap it, that you could probably do it sleeping. The song was "The fresh prince of Bel-air”. You first able to sing the whole thing when you were about twelve years old, and to this day that is the only song that you will ever even try to rap to. You were playing truth or dare with Louis, and you chose dare. Of course, he had to dare to to rap, because he never heard you before. So you started your rapping, but instead of doing the whole song, you ended at (I begged and pleaded with her day after day But she packed my suit case and sent me on my way She gave me a kiss and then she gave me my ticket. I put my Walkman on and said, 'I might as well kick it’.)Louis was getting into the music, so he decided to rap the next part, then you started to rap again, and you finally finished the whole song together.