grilled fruits

Spiritual Drug Use; Practical UPG Guide

Hi! I am calling this a UPG post because, well, it’s my UPG. I have NOT been formally trained in any shamanic system or system of spiritual drug use. This is just my system of being a drug user stoner witch and shamanic practitioner for the past five years. So y'know we’re gunna start with some basics such as

DONT’ START DOING DRUGS. FUCK. DON’T.

Look guys. Doing drugs is NOT a spiritual “shortcut.” Trust me. Doing drugs takes as much time, dedication, pain, sweat, tears, and metaphorical blood as sitting it out on the meditation mat every day. Doing drugs one time will NOT guarantee you a spiritual experience, no matter what Experienced Drug Users™ tell you. In my experience even if a person has an instant spiritual revelation, it’s like a rare candy – 500xp. And that’s it. If you want to learn more and gain more, you have to do more drugs and yeah for some of us it kind of becomes a habit, and no one should erase the fact that for certain spiritual drug users the line between recreational and spiritual is incredibly blurred. And drugs come with shit side-effects. Shit. Pleeeeease trust me. Please do not start doing drugs. It’s not worth it. It isn’t. Plus it’s fucking expensive.

However, in the interest of fuck abstinence-only education, I am going to make a guide. Because some people are going to try it. And I’m not going to stand on the sidelines and wave to those kids as they feel blindly along, laughing and smoking on my pipe and saying “gosh I sure remember when I desperately needed guidance and none was to be had.” So I’m going to write this post :)

Since drug culture is often verbal and stoners and drug users learn through tutelary and initiatory sessions with more experienced drug users around them, I am going to write this post as if the person reading it knows nothing about drug use. This is because I cannot determine the experience level of anyone reading this, so I want to cover every safety concern that comes up.

Oh also, I have not been doing psychedelics and other drugs for decades; I don’t know a whole heck of a lot about the chemical interactions. All I know are basic dumb-person stuff that us regular folks really need to know in order to have safe trips. And that is what I want to share with you today!

Sooooo let’s get started, curious Seeker. I’m going to assume a drug (besides cough syrup and caffiene) has never passed your lips before.

Obviously it would be of huge help to you if you had an IRL friend experienced in drug use to guide you during every session. As equally obvious is the fact that for some people this is impossible. So I give you this short guide as a tea light in the windy path <3

WHAT DO YOU NEED?

You need a certain level of emotional competence. If you cannot control your emotions, acid may not be your drug of choice. In certain psychedelic situations, you need to have a certain control over your own state of mind. On the other hand, it is possible some drugs like marijuana will have a calming effect on you and make it more possible to gain spiritual understanding.

You will need a safe place to trip. You need to have somewhere pretty far away from negative influence. Like, hearing your family yelling in the living room is not an optimal location to have a mushroom trip. If you are comfortable in nature, nature is a great place to trip. “Comfortable in nature” means having the survival skills to reasonably spend a night alone (or with company as your situation allows) in the terrain you choose to camp out in. For fuck’s sake, please don’t drop a ton of acid and wander out in to the forest and get lost with zero survival skills. The trees are not going to wake up and guide you back. You are going to die.

If camping out isn’t an option for you, a very good friend’s house makes an excellent place to take drugs. Especially seek out a friend who is spiritual or very chill with your spirituality; a confidant whom you can tell anything to.

I encourage everyone to wait and seek out a very safe place to trip. You have no idea how much your environment directly influences your trip. You are not going to have a beautiful trip with nature when your environment is dirty, chaotic, and riddled with negativity and human negative emotion. It is very alright to wait weeks or even months until you can have your optimal time to trip. If this means a camping trip half an hour outside of town, great. If this means waiting until the most miserable member of your family is on vacation, great. Do whatever you can. For people tripping inside homes this means thorough cleansing of the trip containment room (your bedroom). In the days or weeks leading up to your trip, try to clean your room as thoroughly as you can. You really want to feel you are in a beautiful temple-space where you are ultimately protected and ultimately able to be creatively free. For people tripping in nature, go to the area beforehand and scout out the energies and spirits there. Hit up a couple of different campsites or locations and just see which place you think will feel best for you. Choose locations which will bring you comfort and relaxation. Don’t show up at dusk on night 1 and find a pissed off and very territorial spirit protecting the campsite you chose online.

You will need basic trip supplies.

Water: ½ gallon for every half-hour of your trip. Multiply by number of trippers on your session. Obviously bring more if you are camping as you should probably not be tripping 100% of the time.

Food; optimally vegetarian (the stomach does flippy things when it sees rainbows and meat in the same sentence), such as PB&J or grilled cheese sandwiches, fresh fruit and vegetable snacks, and vitamin-enforced fruit gummy snacks. Choose things you might feed to someone coming off a stomach flu. Nothing greasy or too rich. Very strong flavor sensations such as those found in sour candy might not be highly appetizing. Prep what you need to beforehand because you may not be able or willing to prepare food for a while.

A cozy space to sleep, whether this be a sleeping bag reinforced with blankies inside a tent, or a bed with freshly made sheets and fluffed pillows. Sometimes when you’re high or tripping you just… need to hit the blankies.

Basic survival (or urban survival) kit. A basic survival kit would include things like first-aid, a knife, emergency lights, etc. A basic urban survival kit is a small bag, purse, fanny pack, satchel, or pocket filled with the following items: ID/driver’s license, all the emergency cash you can muster up ($5-15 is fine if you aren’t intending to go out; $40 if you are going out anywhere. I like a bit of change on hand in case the bros all want to order a pizza, or in case I need to take an emergency Uber, etc.), a list of all the medications you take including what dosage, a daily dose of medication in case you are going out and can’t make it home on time, a list of emergency contacts who are very reliable, a pack of gum (you will thank yourself later) and a small healthy snack (you will definitely thank yourself later!)

Aphone. You need a way to access the outside world. I do not condone tech-free nature trips :P especially not when they are nature “trips” and ESPECIALLY if you are thinking of going alone. Take your phone, take it fully charged, and splurge on a mobile battery pack for it. $10 at Wal-mart. Support the beast to keep yourself safe.

Electrolyte delivery system such as Pedialyte, Gatorade, Powerade, etc. You will need this a couple hours in when you start to get dehydrated. 1 liter of Pedialyte or 3-4 bottles of a sports drink.

Shit to do. You are going to need some stuff to occupy your time with. If you are dropping acid I can almost guarantee you will lost interest in meditation well before hour 7 kicks in.

#DrugUserTip! The real fun of a trip is letting the natural high of your trip wax and wane. There will be times when you want to connect and be spiritual, and other times when you would rather be communicating with someone, making art, writing an article ( ;] ), or watching television or the starry night sky. Ensure you have planned enough to do to occupy your time!

Suggestions are: coloring books and/or art supplies for drawing or painting or whatever medium you prefer. Games, especially if you are going to trip with others; Cards Against Humanity is fun (nothing feels better and gets you more grounded out than feeling like a horrible human laughing at terrible card combos. Great game.), or a deck of cards, kinetic toys, a 3Ds, even a playstation or laptop for playing videogames.

You will need time.

You are going to need to do thorough and accurate research on the drug you are going to use. More on that later, but you need to reasonably know how much time this is actually going to take. If you drop acid for the first time, and it’s a strong enough dose, you may be in for a 12 hour ride. So if you drop at 10am and you have to work at 6pm… not a great combo. Leave the cool “Imma sneak in some heavy drugs right before work because I’m a cool drug user” decision making to the kids who like to show up to work high.

Optimally you will want an entire day afterwords to unravel and ride it out. No work, no school, no family obligations. Just you chilling out with some hot coco alone in your room, processing what happened and getting reacquainted with the world. I will say that I’ve never found this necessary for even the most intense weed trip and I pop right back up like a weed ;) in the morning. If not optimal, just try to get 15 hours between the expected end of the trip and your first obligation. You’ll probably want to sleep a bit between the two.

You will need to research your drug of choice.

What I’m telling you here is just basic shit. You actually gotta go out and look up websites and books and stuff that tell you things because you gotta know about them.

You gotta know what drug interactions you may have. You gotta. This one is not optional. We’re talking like you could kinda literally fuck your shit up permanently if you take the wrong drugs together, so don’t fuck around with it. Go find out your drug interactions.

You gotta have a basic understanding of what this drug is actually doing to you and your brain. If you understand the trip, it makes the trip easier to process, understand, and that makes relaxation easier. If you’re just like IDK WTF IS GOING ON the entire time it won’t be super enjoyable for you. It’s not like cracking a new novel for the first time without reading the back cover first. You’re literally fucking with your brain so???? do the research??? and find out wtf it’s going to do to you??

TWO WORDS OF ADVICE

Do marijuana first.

Look, I like weed. But I’ve never ever ever met an Experienced Drug User™ who recommended doing “heavier”, “harder” drugs first. I’ve actually brought this exact question up to many people and they’ve all said the same thing: start by smoking weed. If you want to have wild acid trips, mind-blowing mushroom journeys, whatever – start with weed. You need to have that foundation level of experience knowing what it’s like to be high before you go get really fucking high.

Consider weed to be the tutorial mode of drugs. A…. gateway…. if you will, to drugs. A portal to step through to get to other drugs. A drug door? If that makes sense?

Don’t do crazy shaman-only drugs. Leave that for the shaman-guided trips.

Skip the Ayahuasca for now. Stick to things we know a little better domestically. If you want to pay for a trip to Peru and sign up for a guided shaman drug trip, you do you!! But don’t try to prepare and do rituals that should be preserved for those with serious spiritual background.

PREPERATORY TIME – WHERE THE SPIRITUALITY ACTUALLY STARTS

We’re talking about a spiritual drug trip :) so at some point, the research ends. You know your drug interactions, you know how this drug is going to affect you. You’ve done your best to create the safest space possible for your trip, with lots of preparations like food and water in the works. Now it’s time to get spiritual.

You will want to fully cleanse before any spiritual drug trip. Unless you want to spend five hours intensely focused on the spiritual grime coating you, please cleanse. A shower will work great :) Scrub yourself from head to toe, starting with shampoo, face, neck, and so on, down to the spaces in between your toes and the bottoms of your feet. As you scrub, just be aware that as you cleanse physical dirt you also cleanse psychic dirt. They are connected; as you clean one, you cleanse the other.

If you want to be more ritualistic about it, here you go:

Take a pot holding about 1 liter of water and boil it. Whenever you add an ingredient, say the following incantation over it: “Spirit of Substance, I ask that you awaken and arise, and add your powers of Powers to my brew, so I may become ultimately cleansed and purified in mind, body, and soul.”

  • Add three large whole bay leaves or pieces adding up to three large whole leaves. Powers: “divine cleansing and powerful uplifting vibrations.”
  • Add a teaspoon of any of the following: lavender, chamomile, lemon balm. Powers: “intense calming.”
  • Add two tablespoons of salt. Powers: “wiping away evil.”
  • Add a teaspoon of rosemary, pine needles, or basil. Powers: “divine protection.”

Bring boil down to simmer. Stir ingredients with wooden spoon clockwise, focusing on how they blend together and form a perfect brew of cleansing, calming, and protective powers. Sooner or later (sometimes up to 15 or 20 minutes for me) you will feel the brew is “ready”. When you feel this, strain the brew out in to a heat safe container. Thank the plant remnants for their sacrifice and discard, but not in the compost (too salty!).

Scrub and clean your tub very well. Take a shower and wash yourself well. After you are rinsed and clean, turn the tub on to a comfortable temperature for soaking. Add your liter of witch’s brew to the bath water. As you pour it, ask the brew to infuse in to the bath water. Imagine your words touch the heart of this potion and speaks to all the spirits within. Soak in the water and let it cleanse you, calm you, and protect you. Light incense and candles in the bathroom if you can for some effective atmosphere.

No tub? No problem! Use a cloth or sponge to soak up the brew in the shower. Squeeze it over your body and pat it on your arms, torso, and legs. Sit quietly and soak in this brew and focus on the protection and cleansing you receive. Meditate to feel the calm.

Once cleansed you will want to place basic wards in the space you are tripping in. If you are in nature, why not a few nail crosses designed to keep away malicious and evil spirits? In your home, try brewing another potion. Use the incantation, “Spirit of Substance, awake and arise! Add your powers of Powers to my protective and defensive brew.” The three basic ingredients are cinnamon, cloves, and red pepper flakes (Powers: “fiery protection” for all three), mixed with frankincense if you have it, bay leaf if you don’t (Powers: “divine protection”). The purpose of this potion is to create a protective barrier. Create a very simple sigil meaning KEEP OUT MALICIOUS SPIRITS AND ENERGIES. When your potion is done brewing on the stove, use a paintbrush to paint large iterations of your sigil on walls, mirrors, doors, and window panes. ENSURE however the ingredients you have chose will not stain any surfaces first!!

Now that you are cleansed and prepped your space for protection, it is time for some relaxing journaling. Light a candle or get in a relaxed atmosphere and ask yourself what you really want from this trip. Is it communication? Learning divine truth? Trying to see spirits? Just hearing from the Universe itself? Whatever you are seeking, write it out. Write out questions as if you are preparing for an interview. Write out thoughts and what your greatest hopes are for this trip. Keep this journal with you to reference while you are high.

Right before the trip, the moments before you take the drug, do a ritual of dedication. This can be as simple as sitting cross-legged and closing your eyes and thinking, “I seek my highest good during this drug trip.” It can be as complex as a full ritual calling the quarters and announcing your intent to the Universe. Do what makes you feel comfortable. Here is a small example ritual if you would like one to reference:

Cast a protective circle. Take two of the following: a stick of incense, a candle, a dish of water, or an earthy stone. Sit in front of them and Name each as the element it represents. For example, “I sit here with this dish of water, which brings Water to my circle. I sit here with this stone, which brings Earth in to my circle.” You do not need all four elements present, this is only a simple ritual :) I think two is a good number but include all the elements you like.

Meditate with the good feelings these elements bring you. Surely it brings you a feeling of calm when you may be nervous about taking a serious drug. When you are ready, say,

“Element of Element, I brought you here today so you could support me and protect me during my trip. I am seeking a spiritual journey, and I want your guidance and support during this time.” Repeat this for each element. Speak to them honestly; tell them about your worries and fears. Get your anxieties out. Tell them about what you hope to achieve and what you are excited about!

When you are done talking, place the representations somewhere nearby. Ask the elements to stay with you, and if they are willing then you have a good valuable ally during your trip :) Erase your circle as you should no longer need it within your fully warded trip space.

ALRIGHT LET’S DO SOME DRUGS

Food and water? Check. All spiritual preparatory steps? Check. All physical safety preparatory steps? Check. Nothing left to do now but take some drugs, amIright?

At this point it basically becomes a personal experience but I can tell you some common things you may run in to and how I personally handle them.

Once I take a drug I usually feel a rush of nervous energy. I just strapped in for the rollercoaster ride and now, welp, I’m still sober and gosh that anxiety is getting bad…. some drugs, such as LSD or marijuana edibles, can take a long time to kick in. Do not take extra doses because nothing has kicked in after 30 minutes. You should know how long this drug is going to take to kick in for you. You should know how long you need to reasonably wait, even hours, to feel the effects.

I find that marijuana greatly increases the intensity and effect of every other psychedelic I take. If you are a marijuana smoker, try smoking weed to calm pre-trip anxiety and to help the trip “kick in” once enough time has reasonably passed for the drug you took.

Sometimes, laying down during a trip is really nice. But if I’m too high it turns in to a nightmare. If you are not feeling good, ask yourself if you are being very sedentary. Why not get up and move around? Try an activity like a coloring book or a simple task like taking a shower :)

Stay in communication!! Whether that be with your IRL trip buddies, your online friends, your spirit friends, your gods, the Universe… stay talking :) don’t go too deep inside your own head. Shit just gets weird in there. To me, the point of drug trips are the increased ability to communicate.

Doodle and journal whenever you feel the urge. It is quite nice to be able to reflect on your mushroom trip homebrew psychedelic drawings later on. As you practice being high, you’ll learn to write more accurate and concise reflections of your mental state that make more sense while you’re sober. Don’t mind if you can’t decipher your ramblings right away! It does take a bit of practice.

Allow your thoughts to carry you. Don’t trouble yourself with forcing a certain path. These drugs defy force and certainty. Let the trip take you where it wants to go. Of course you can guide it and stop negative thoughts :) but if you wanted to have a trip about seeing spirits, and it turns in to a trip about learning messages from your higher self, let the trip take its natural course. Don’t try and force it in to your idealized version of a trip.

If a negative thought does come up, there are some things I have trained myself to do: don’t dwell on it. When I trip, dwelling on a negative thought is like a freefall through the ocean depths. I spend just a few moments focused on negativity and when I’m ready to come out of it I realize I’m 20,000 leagues under the sea. So my trick is to squash that shit. Here are some methods I use to squash negative energy thoughts when I’m high:

  • Put the thought in the Vault. Just lock it up in that box in the back of your brain that never opens and you can only teleport stuff in and it never comes back out. Just boop, in the vault. Locked up.
  • Put the thought on a leaf floating down a stream, to be carried downstream to a very tall purifying waterfall.
  • Obsessively think about something else. Browse Tumblr or Reddit. Sketch. Talk to people. Distract yourself hardcore and get fun and energized and kinda dig the trenches for some good energy to flow back in.
  • Chilling with plants is DOPE while you’re on psychedelics, especially a beloved plant that has been treated well. Chill with some house plants or a nearby tree :D Try this if you are feeling anxious or overwhelmed.

No shame in hitting the blankie fort. Sometimes I get very over-stimulated. If you are feeling like input is too much, flop on the bed and put a pillow over your ears.

Try keeping lighting low to minimal depending on your comfort levels. Very bright lights just seem… harsh. It’s not fun. I typically do not prefer natural flame because I am very safety conscious while I’m high, so usually a dim lamp in a room is enough for me.

When you want to get started meditating, become comfortable and use your favorite techniques. Don’t focus too much on controlling your thoughts. Just focus on your goals for this session (you know, the ones you journaled about in the preparatory phases!) and let yourself relax, try to stay focused, and see what happens.

Drink water. Even when you don’t feel particularly thirsty. Switch between water and your electrolyte system. Don’t over-do it and get water poisoning, obviously. Just sip water regularly and drink electrolytes regularly.

Don’t double-dip. Eventually your trip will wear off. Don’t be tempted to take extra doses to make the trip last longer. It won’t work, you’ll waste drugs, and you’ll be disappointed. Even if you didn’t get your “guaranteed” full hours of trip, just let it go :) you got what you were there for! This just means more time to come down, get sleep, eat, and decompress before your responsibilities coming up.

COMING DOWN

You should definitely already know the come-down effects of the drugs you took. With a lot of psychedelics this can mean feeling like trash for days after. Combine this with a mental illness like depression or bipolar disorder and you’re gunna feel riggity-riggity-fucked up in a bad way, son. Get your support systems in order. These drugs are no joke and they will make you feel terrible under the right conditions. Hopefully you’ll be riding an amazing spiritual high that will get you through this time but in any situation, be prepared for the come-down.

There are things you can do to improve this process. In the days leading up to your trip catch up on chores so you have very little to do in the days following your trip. Prepare food ahead of time. Even trade shifts if you need to. Spend a lot of time with IRL people and friends, this helps take the edge off. Chamomile tea and other bright flavors and herbs will help “brighten” you up. Spend time in the sun. Get LOTS of sleep and lots of good nutritious food (your body has to rebuild all the chemicals it lost… needs good nutrition to do so!)

WAIT BUT I WAS JUST SMOKING WEED THIS ALL SOUNDS KINDA HARDCORE

Alright so you’re just smoking weed! Basically all this info still applies. Scale as necessary. You may not need such hardcore preparations and you won’t have a “coming down” phase.

Still prepare things to do. Still do a dedication ritual, a cleansing ritual, and set up protections. A spiritual drug trip is not the same as a recreational drug trip. You are calling and attracting and connecting with greater forces, and this does attract negative attention sometimes. So DON’T skimp on protections, even for weed. If you’re a lazy stoner mage like me, just permanently ward your room and have a few handy amulets you can carry with you when you need to go out. Easy-peasy.

THE END

Yep! This is all I got for ya! I hope this was helpful in a practical sense to anyone seeking spiritual drug use guidance. Again, I do not advocate anyone start using drugs. But as I stated earlier, I do not support abstinence-only education so this is why I have written this post :) I hope this can help keep at least one person safe on their journeys. Message me with any questions!

Why is it so easy to eat healthy in the summer?

Grilled veggies, cloud bread “bun” for the hot dog, watermelon.

Paleo Cloud Bread:
- 3 eggs, divided into yolks and whites
- ¼ teaspoon baking soda
- 3 tablespoons mayo

Add the baking soda into the egg whites and beat until stiff peaks form. Mix mayo and yolks together, then slowly fold into whites.

Use a measuring cup to scoop out mix onto parchment paper lined baking sheets. I made mine into a long shape for hotdogs, but you can make them into circle shapes for burgers or whatnot.

Bake at 300 degrees for 30 minutes.

Not Anything Special (Part 1)

Caspian x Reader

May 19, 2017

Word Count: 2383

Requested by: @coolcoolfantasy

Warnings: none

Note: GOSH I am so sorry this took so long! Thank you for being so patient! This prompt is amazing, and it got away from me so quickly, I’m going to have to split it up into parts! I hope you enjoy it!

I think it’s better if it’s a Caspian x  reader about how Caspian fall in love with a simple girl who came after Pevensies. Caspian forgets about Susan and fall in love with her even though she is not a warrior but just a normal girl.

^^^

The carriage jostles Y/N around for the umpteenth time and she inwardly groans. She hated coach rides, but her parents didn’t trust to send her across all of Narnia on a horse, but herself. An elderly lady, the only other person in the coach, glances up at her.

“Do you want something to help you sleep? I have some herbs in my pack,” she offers, motioning with knobby hand to the bag that sits between their feet.

“No, thank you, madam,” Y/N replies. She looks out the window. “I’ve just been on this coach for too long.”

The woman nods. “Are you going to Cair Paravel for the celebration of the Kings and Queens returning and helping to end the reign of the Telmarines?”

“No. My parents are sending me to the capital for a better life. My mother is friends with a servant in the castle and she has found me a position there,” Y/N tells the woman.  

The woman nods again, her hands returning to the weaving in her lap. “Opportunities are good when people are around the Kings and Queens.”

Y/N eyes the woman, whose hands were moving over the thread in her hands expertly, even though it was dark in the cabin. “You speak as if you knew them yourself.”

The woman chuckles. “I wish I had.”

“You might still,” Y/N offers, and the woman smiles sadly.

“Maybe so.”

 ~*~*~

When the carriage arrives in the city six hours later, the woman was asleep. Y/N leans forward to wake her, but her eye catches a bright flash of red and gold to the side and her hand falls instead around the edge of the window.

The walls of the Telmarine capital slowly grow taller as the coach travels deeper into the city. Y/N stares up in awe at the exquisite architecture, so much better than the small houses that littered her own village so many miles away. The carriage suddenly starts to slow and the old woman blinks awake.

“Oh, we’ve arrived,” she says, her voice raspier than before. “Why have we stopped?”

Y/N shrugs and leans her head out of the window to ask the driver the question.

“There’s a festival going on, madam,” he replies. “We’ll be stalled here for a while.”

The woman starts to put her things together. “Wait, what are you doing?” Y/N asks, and the woman stops and looks up at her with wide, blue eyes.

“I’m getting out. I want to see the Kings and Queens as soon as possible.” Y/N watches, dumbfounded, as the woman gets her things together, opens the door, and starts to climb out of the cab without waiting for someone to stop and help her. Y/N quickly grabs her things and pays the driver, following the woman.

“Can you show me the direction to the castle?” Y/N asks, and the woman glances over her shoulder.

“Follow me, dearie, and you’ll see them soon enough!” the woman calls, and Y/N scurries to catch up. She wasn’t necessarily looking for the family of royals, but she went with the woman anyway. They reach the edge of the courtyard that most of the crowd was gathered in, just in time to see an enormous lion and a boy watch as four people, two boys and two girls, walk through a man-sized hole in a tree and disappear. Cries erupt from the crowd and the dark haired boy turns away from the tree. He looks over the crowd, his jaw set tight, and Y/N’s stomach churns when his eyes flit from her to someone else.

“That was them,” the woman sighs, folding her hands in front of her. “I missed them again.”

“Again?” Y/N asks, and the woman turns and starts to make her way back through the crowd. “Wait, madam!”

“Go to the castle, young one,” the woman says, turning. She puts an unexpectedly strong hand on Y/N’s arm. “Do something amazing with this opportunity you’ve been given.”

Y/N nods, speechless, and watches as the woman hobbles through the crowd, disappearing in the mass of people.

 ~*~*~

(Four and a half years later)

“Y/N!” Amelie, the servant’s boss, whispers, and Y/N jolts awake. “You’re on breakfast duty! Remember to brush your hair today, because you’re serving!” Amelie bustles away, disappearing amongst the bunks that lined the room, waking the others.

Y/N rubs her eyes and sits up. She’s yanked back onto her pillow, though, by her hair that was caught under her bottom. She sighs in agitation and pulls her hair out from under her and sits up again, swinging her legs over the side. Standing, she stretches her arms and reaches for her toes, letting her back pop. She goes to her trunk and pulls out her clothes for the day and then moves quietly through the servant’s quarters.

She takes a quick bath in the cold water that was sitting in one of the tubs, waiting for someone to use it. After she gets out, she refills the tub with water from a spout in the corner of the room and then changes into her day clothes. Just as she was leaving, she remembers Amelie’s order to brush her hair, and does so. She pulls it into a braid before leaving the bathroom to go back to her bunk. There, she puts away her nightgown and pulls out her socks and boots.

Finally exiting the servant’s quarters, she takes a deep breath of Narnian air, putting her hands on her hips as she walks along the short cobbled path to the kitchen. She could hear the clatter of pots and pans and the shout of the cook to his kitchen staff before she even opened the heavy door, stopping to pet the stray cat that hung around the bushes outside the kitchen.

Heaving the door open, Y/N slips around the edge of the kitchen to where the other servants on serving duty were chatting, putting on their aprons and little bonnets that were customary for servants that would be amongst the king and other members of the royal court. Y/N picks up her own apron and starts to tie it around her waist. She had been on serving duty for the past few months, and had always been treated with the civility that King Caspian gave them all; she was happy that it wasn’t anything like the horror stories she had heard of how the Telmarines treated the staff.

“Y/N, I want you to lead the group today,” Amelie says, and Y/N nods in response. She had been comfortable in the position of leadership that Amelie had put her in the last few weeks, and was happy that she was being placed with the responsibility.

The servants line up next to the counter that the cook’s staff put the plates that were ready to be served on, relaxed and chatting, the younger girls giggling behind Y/N. The cook shouts out, “Service!” The servants straighten their shoulders in unison and fall silent, taking plates as they came. Y/N pushes the door open with her back, hands laden with plates of fruits and grilled meat.

Y/N makes her way to the table that consisted of the king and his valued court members that were lucky enough to live in the castle. Y/N and the rest of the staff fan out gracefully, setting plates down in synchronized movements.

As Y/N places King Caspian’s plates before him, he smiles up at her. Y/N bows her head, curtseying a bit, and could swear that he was watching her leave as she made her way back to the kitchen.

Y/N takes her place on the wall with a pitcher of fruit juice in her hand for the rest of the meal, ready to serve when she was beckoned. She didn’t look at the table directly, but watched the members of the court eat out of the corner of her eye.

At the end of the meal, the court leaves, single file. When the last member was gone, the team of servants swoop in to clean the mess and start to help prepare for lunch, where all members of the court and some of their family members would be joining. As Y/N stacks dirty plates on top of one another, placing silver ware in a shallow bucket, Amelie enters the room, scanning her staff’s faces.

“Y/N,” she says, making her way across the room. Her face was red, but Y/N couldn’t tell if it was from work or anger. Y/N straightens and her eyes widen, ready to be chastised if it were the latter. “What did you do during the meal?”

“I- I served, madam,” Y/N stammers.

Who?” Amelie says forcefully.

“The king, madam,” Y/N squeaks. “And then I served juice when needed. I stood against the wall when I wasn’t doing so, madam.”

Amelie searches Y/N’s face, the woman’s dark, greying hair whisked across her wrinkled forehead. Her eyes look furiously across Y/N’s face, looking for signs of lies.

“M-may I ask why you’re inquiring, madam?” Y/N says hesitantly.

Amelie runs a hand down her face, wiping sweat off. “The king has requested your presence,” she says, finally. “And I know you. You’re good and kind, and wouldn’t make a mistake big enough that the king would punish you himself. So this has to be a good thing. Go, clean up. He requested for you to meet him immediately.”

Y/N gulps, surprised. “Yes, madam,” she says, picking up her skirts so she could move quicker. Y/N pushes to the sink in the corner of the kitchen, dunking her hands in the pot of clean water and scooping water to her face. She scrubs her hands and smooths her dress before turning out of the kitchen door.

Walking quickly, her mind swimming, Y/N feels terror growing in her chest. What did she do? Did she touch him on accident? Did she have a nasty look on her face unconsciously? Did she not bow low enough? None of these things sounded like something the king would normally be upset about, but Y/N just didn’t know what she did.

“Excuse me!” a voice comes from the doorway that Y/N had just hurried past. She stops for a second, turning and looking over her shoulder. She was required to stop if it was a member of the court stopping her, but she was ready to tell anyone else that she had to go. Her mouth already parted to snap, her words die in her throat as the king himself stepped out from around the archway. “You are Y/N, right?” he asks, his accent strong.

Gulping, Y/N curtseys, ducking deeper than she usually did, in case that was what she was in trouble for. “Yes, Your Majesty.”

“Please, walk with me,” he says, motioning to the doorway. He waits for her to be at his side for he starts into the large courtyard that laid in the center of the palace. King Caspian doesn’t talk at first, but walks next to her with his hands clasped behind his back, looking at the greenery and statues that surrounded him. Finally, he stops in a small, secluded circle that was surrounded by hedges. A statue of a woman sits in the center, looking tall and regal.

“Do you know who this is a statue of?” the king asks her, looking down at her.

Y/N gazes at the statue. “Queen Susan? The Gentle?”

Caspian laughs. “No. This is her sister, Queen Lucy.” They both look up at the statue and he adds, “The Valiant.”

“Ah,” Y/N says, her voice shaking. “You knew them, right?”

“Yes, for a short time,” King Caspian replies. He looks down at Y/N again. “How long have you worked for the castle?”

“Four and a half years, Your Majesty,” Y/N replies.

“Please, call me Caspian. That means you were here when they left?”

“I arrived shortly after,” Y/N tells him. He sits on a stone bench and motions for her to join him. She sits as far as she could away from him, but it wasn’t much.

“And your accent and looks tell me you aren’t from this region,” Caspian continues.

Y/N touches her long, blonde braid. “No, Your Majesty- er, Caspian.”

Caspian nods, a soft smile on his face. They sit in silence for a few moments. A soft breeze flows through the small courtyard, and Caspian was quiet for so long that Y/N allowed herself a small second to enjoy the breeze. After almost five years, she still wasn’t used to how fresh the air was in the capital.

“I’m being advised by my court that I need to be married,” Caspian says, and Y/N snaps back to attention. “And…” he trails off, not looking at Y/N.

“And?” Y/N prompts, forgetting her manners for a moment.

“I’ve taken a liking to you,” Caspian says, turning to her. “I’d like to start courting you, if you would let me.”

Y/N stares at Caspian, her mind blank. “Excuse me?” she says, her mouth moving without her brain.

“I know this is sudden, but you’re one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever met,” Caspian says, his hands fidgeting. Y/N looks down at them. “And I’ve met with the women that the court has suggested for me, and none of them compare to you.”

Y/N looks back up at Caspian’s face. His wide, dark eyes stare back into hers. It wasn’t as if she could say no, right? He could have her banished, and it would be awkward to serve around him if he didn’t.

“Sure,” Y/N finally forces out, and Caspian’s face breaks out into a wide smile.

“Really?”

“Yes,” Y/N says, nodding.

“Fantastic!” Caspian says, standing and pulling her to her feet. Realizing that he had just touched her without her permission, he yanks his hands back and blushes. “Sorry. Okay. So, I’ll come and visit you soon, okay?”

“Okay,” Y/N says, amused at his boyish glee. How could he be so happy to be building a relationship with her? She wasn’t anything special. Other girls that she had seen around the castle that were drooling over the king were skilled in reputable tasks, such as archery or sword fighting or extremely intricate weaving. They were all incredibly smart. She was a mediocre weaver, and didn’t take any interest in weaponry. While she could read and write, she didn’t practice often.

“I’ll meet with you soon,” Caspian says again, bowing a little. She gasps as he leaves. He had bowed to her.

Rainy Days (Overwatch Imagines)

Hey, everyone! I’m back, and here with a new set of Overwatch Imagines! As always, my Asks are open, so feel free to ask away! :D

Roadhog

  • Mako takes up a lot of space, so prefers not to go outside during the rain. If he has to leave the comfort of his room on base, prepare for a running hog.
  • Roadhog allows his s/o to lay on their belly when hanging out on the couch, especially if he’s full.
  • If the television isn’t working, Mako begins to grow impatient. There has been more than one occasion of hook-through-the-screen.
  • Thunder and lightning tends to make Mako laugh more than anything, so his s/o is always prepared for thunder, then thunderous chuckles.
  • Surprisingly, Mako makes wonderful food. On many a rainy evening, he invites his crew members from Overwatch into the dining hall for a wonderful feast of grilled meat, fresh fruits, and enough alcohol to make McCree’s jaw drop.

Hanzo

  • Hanzo is not the biggest fan of being in the rain, but he does enjoy the sight, and the smell, and the feeling of it all. When a fresh storm is on the horizon, Hanzo will lean against his room’s window and gaze at the pine trees outside of the base become entrenched with water.
  • Artificial lighting is often used within the facility, but not in Mr. Shimada’s room. All of the sources of light use either flame, or warm orange light bulbs. During one particularly harsh storm, his s/o found their room to be entirely filled with other Overwatch members, enjoying the only viable source of light available.
  • Hanzo isn’t a very warm person on the field, but when he’s off of work, Hanzo is a very compassionate and understanding person. If his s/o becomes afraid of the lightning striking the earth nearby, Hanzo will gently hold them, rocking ever so slightly back and forth and whispering old tales that he remembered from his youth,
  • On one occasion, Hanzo was incredibly distraught, pacing up and down the halls of the base, scraping his bow against the wall paneling. Genji wasn’t back from a mission, and he was in dire need of reassurance from his brother that he was okay. Once Genji arrived at the door of the compound, Hanzo rushed his brother, engulfing him in a strong hug with a shaking body.

McCree

  • Jesse is a cowboy; a man of great charisma and style. Rain is not part of the equation. So, when water begins to fall onto the brim of his hat, Jesse sighs, recognizing the fact that he has to leave the field outside of the base, and allow the bullet hole-ridden tin cans to rust in peace.
  • McCree prefers to relax in a simple t-shirt and jeans instead of his full outfit, but the hat. The hat stays put. If his s/o takes off the hat, prepare to get chased.
  • Jesse’s room is covered in memorabilia from his missions and adventures, from foreign flags to shot-up hats. That being said, if you look in any of the corners of the house, you can find a handwoven blanket, interlaced yarn with vibrant colors of red and orange and brown.
  • Jesse loves to make sure that his partner is safe and warm, but is also worried about them overheating. Mission upon mission in the sand-filled deserts have taught him much about hydration and cooling down, and how dangerous it is to overheat.
  • If his partner is trying to sleep, and the thunder is stopping that, McCree will begin to softly sing them ballads of legendary heroes. On occasion, those songs would become focused on one of his friends; from the soft swan song of Mercy to the powerful sad tale of Reaper.

bacon (m) - bacon
beurre (m) - butter
biscotte (f) - rusk
biscuit (m) - biscuit, cookie
brioche (f) - brioche
café (m) - coffee
café décaféiné - decaffeinated coffee
café au lait - coffee with milk
céréales (pl) - cereal
chocolat (m) au lait - chocolate milk
confiture (f) - jam
confiture de […] - […] jam
croissant (m) - croissant
fruit (m) - (individual) fruit (use the plural fruits in sentences such as “I am eating fruit”)
fruit sec (m) - (individual) dried fruit (similar to above, use fruits secs)
grille-pain (m) - toaster
jambon (m) - ham
journal (m) - newspaper
jus (m) - juice
jus de fruits - fruit juice
jus de […]/d’[…] - […] juice
lait (m) - milk
lait à l’avoine - oat milk
lait chaud - hot milk
lait de soja - soy milk
lait demi-écrémé - semi-skimmed milk
lait écrémé - skimmed milk
miel (m) - honey
muesli (m) - müsli
œuf (m) - egg
pain (m) de mie (f) - sandwich loaf
petit déjeuner - breakfast
petit déjeuner continental - continental breakfast
petit déjeuner anglais/américain - english/american breakfast
saucisse (f) - sausage
sucre (m) - sugar
tasse (f) - mug
tasse à café - coffee cup
thé (m) - tea
théière (f) - teapot
toast (m) / pain grillé - toast
yaourt (m) - yoghurt

prendre le petit déjeuner - to have breakfast

from @langsandlit’s Breakfast vocabulary in Italian

Misotheism Part I

Genre: Drama

Word Count: 1000ish 

Greek God AU! Series 

Originally posted by jengkook

‘Misotheism (n): the hatred of God’


December 31st, 11:59 PM

635 B.C.

You’re running.

The night is silent, save for the sound of bare feet slapping against the slightly wet soil, leaving a trail of imprints behind them. Your chest heaves as you struggle to run, and you can’t help the terror coursing through your veins as you hear the sound of heavy footsteps behind you.

What had made it come to this?


March, 635 B.C.

You sigh tiredly as you squint up to the sky, cursing at the sun for beating down your back with vigor. The sky is clear overhead, with the occasional shadows of birds flitting across it.

“What’s got you down, Y/N?”

You look to the right to see a crookedly grinning young man quirking a brow at you.

“Silence, Yun,” Your mood is admittedly down, “You’re being a pest.”

“So mean, sister,” He mocks you playfully, hand running through his silky dark tresses that you swear were created by Athena herself, “I’ve only come to call you back to our home; Mother is looking for you.”

“Again?” You groan in exasperation, “What does she want this time?”

He gives a non-committal shrug of the shoulders.

“She just told me to search for you and I, like the absolutely fantastic person I am, have done it.” With a smug smile, he waves you off and you roll your eyes, before sighing yet again and trudging along the dusty trail to your home.

It’s small, much smaller than those huge villas you’ve seen dominate the inner parts of the city and though a part of you still feels bitter about it, you’ve learned to make do with what you have. It’s your life; you need to deal with it, as your Father says.

“Mother?” You call, ducking into your tiny rickety home, mindful of the pots dumped haphazardly on the cool ground, “You called for me?”

A frail woman peeks her head out from the tiny kitchen-come-dining, a thin smile playing on her lips.

“Oh yes, dear,” She beckons you forward, and you oblige, only to gape in shock when an entire platter of grilled goat’s meat and fruits is thrust into your unprepared arms, “Could you take this to the inner city for me? I’m feeling awfully tired today.”

“W-what for?” You demand, wide-eyed, unable to tear your eyes from the food, “Why aren’t we eating this?”

Mother smiles at you, though it lacks the warmth it usually possesses.

“We are going to war, my dear,” She whispers softly, and it strikes you then, “We must please the God of War.”

“No,” You angrily shake your head, vision beginning to tint blood red, “If we are going to war, we must fight it with our own hands, Mama, not by sacrificing the precious few resources we have for-”

“Enough!” She raises her voice, and you fall silent, knowing that the conversation is complete. “Do as I say, Y/N! I should never have encouraged your silly little beliefs!”

The last part is whispered to herself, but you hear every word; each one strikes you like an icicle through the heart. Your Mother is someone you have always looked up to, someone who you have always gone to for comfort, for understanding, so her disappointment…it hurts you, a lot.

“Yes, Mother.” You nod quietly, before turning on your heel and scampering out of the shack.

Your feet carry you automatically in the direction of the city and, even at the outskirts, you can see people preparing for war; throngs of men sharpening their swords, some men stocking their homes with necessities, such as food. Some women are dancing around a fire, grilling meat. And, sitting in solitude on a lonely rock is a young girl, who eyes the meat with hungry, desperate eyes.

A rush of anger courses through you, thrumming through your veins and heating them up. You remember a time when you were that girl, when you so hopefully, naively, believed in the Gods; when you, like countless others, fell for those foolish tales.

But you know better now.

Cautiously eyeing the crowd, you approach the girl, slipping her some meat from your plate; she looks up, startled, before breaking out into a bright grin.

“Thank you!” She exclaims cheerfully, and you beam back at her, happy to help, before you bid her adieu and are on course again.

A strange sort of guilt gnaws at you, but you push it aside in favor of trying to bear with the scintillating heat. It is really hot right now.

 You nearly collapse in relief when you finally reach the temple of War God, but your heart nearly stops when you see just how many people are outside it. It would likely take till midnight to reach the inside, and you’re in no patience to deal with such things. You decide to visit a lesser known sight, one that is mostly hidden from the scathing gazes of the city folk.

The small temple stands proudly at the top of a sloped hill; though it is a struggle, you eventually manage to scale it, thankfully not dropping any of the food.

Setting the platter in front of the deity, you awkwardly step back, having absolutely no idea what to do now.

“Um,” You start off hesitantly, “My Mother asked me to bring this to you, I suppose. For the war and all that. But I think that’s plain foolishness; who would know if you actually exist? We’ve been taught so many stories by now, but they’re just that: stories.

“If you Gods really existed, our people wouldn’t be suffering like this! If you actually existed, I wouldn’t need to be here right now, I wouldn’t have to waste such precious food on something that doesn’t even eat!”

By this time, you’re shaking, anger racing through your heart, breathing rapidly, unevenly.

“I hate this! I hate feeling so powerless, I hate feeling so puny! I hate-”

You freeze when you feel a hand grip your shoulder, your eyes impossibly wide.

“You hate me?” A velvety voice chuckles into your ear, the hot puffs of breath hitting the shell of your ear, “Are you certain?”

You slowly turn around, raising your eyes to meet amused, fiery brown eyes. The man is tall, at least compared to you, with dark hair swept to the side, and bright pink lips that contrast oh-so-wonderfully with his pale skin. Not that you’re looking.

“Who are you?” You stumble backwards hastily, nearly tripping over your gown, “Where did you come from?”

“Why, I thought you’d know me, considering how you were just cursing my existence,” The man smiles, revealing pearly white teeth.

“But I’ll spell it out for you, if that is what you require. I go by Άρης, but mortals know me as Jungkook,” The smile transforms into a smirk, “God of War.”


Next Parts: Part II  Part III  Part IV  Part V  Part VI  Part VII


Written by: Admin Midnight

Admin Midnight is working on this series with Admin Sangria [her wife ♥] who’ll be writing future parts with her! 

We hope you like it!

starburstz21  asked:

I has an Ask! MAYBE a little drabble of Sidon and Link cooking? Pleeeese <3

Link cannot cook. He had no need to for cooking skills beside from grilling fruits, vegetables and small pieces of meat. If cooking got any more complicated he ends with the result of giving himself food poisoning. Lucky for him Sidon knew how to actually cook. Sidon had no need for the skill either for he only ate raw fish as well as fruit and vegetables. However once he saw Link’s attempts to cook, he asked the cooks in the palace to teach him. He couldn’t bear to see Link limiting himself to simple dishes and bringing himself to sickness.

               After much research on Hyrulian dieting, many cooking lessons and much experimenting, he invited Link to dining with him one night. That night Link sat alone in the dining hall of the palace. He felt out of place without anyone else with him. Where could Sidon have been? He was the one to ask Link to dine with him tonight. After several minutes without Sidon’s arrival, Link had decided look for his beloved prince. He stood from his seat and strolled to the doors that lead to kitchen. Before Link get half way to the door Sidon came out the door with Plates in his hands.

               “Ah! Link, sorry for taking so long.” Sidon said with an apologetic smile, “Please return to your seat.”

               With a smile Link followed Sidon back to table, thinking it was cute Sidon was acting like a waiter. The two sat next to each other at the table as Sidon set the plates on the table. Link had suspected their meal tonight to be delicate slices of raw fish and various other foods. But tonight Sidon was the only one with that. Laid on Link’s plate was large slabs of grilled meat, diced vegetables, he could smell the many spices used in the dish. Without hesitation he picked up his fork and knife and ate the meat. It was delicious; Link didn’t know the cook in Zora’s Domain could cook meat like this.

               Sidon watched his little beloved eat the food he prepared with such delight, “I’m glad you enjoy the meal Link.”

               ‘I do’, Link signed, ‘This is amazing!’

               “Oh good, I was worried I’d over cooked it and It would be too dry.” Sidon said as he lifted a piece of fish to his lips.

               Link stared in shock, ‘You made this?’

               “Why yes.” Sidon replied with a proud smile, his tail wagging happily behind this head.

               ‘But why? There are cooks here to prepare all the food. Why would you go throw hassle of making me one meal?’

               “Because,” Sidon said, “I see what you’ve been eating and thought I could cook for you and you can get better food. I want to take care of you Link. I got make sure you’re happy and healthy, what kind of mate would I be if I did not?”

               Link couldn’t believe it, ‘How did I get so lucky to have met you?’

               “That’s my question.” Sidon said with a sly smile.

               ‘Thank you Sidon’ Link signed, ‘This is wonderful.’

               And ever since Sidon had made Link’s most meals. He would cook them dinner whenever they were together. He would pack small lunches for Link for when he was on his adventures. And at every meal Sidon surprised Link with a new flavor. Links had gotten the habit of taking pictures of Sidon’s dishes and showing others and tell what amazing cook Sidon is. But with every meal it reminded Link how much Sidon does care for him and love him. That’s what make Link the happiest.


   SEND MORE REQUEST! I DO WRITE SFW AND NSFW!

Happy Friday!!!! Woohooo! Going to be a great weekend filled with picnics, BBQs, parties, fireworks and of course, lots of unhealthy foods!  Be careful, be dedicated, selected healthy items (grilled chicken, fruit, salad).  Don’t let holidays make you take 2 steps backwards.  You can do it!!!  I believe in you! 

Follow me for more pics/fun/tips/exercise/nutrition @shelleysicfit

Recovering From Energy Work

This post is aimed at the person receiving an intense bout of energy work. Specifically I’ve experienced these side effects in a few people to happen when energy ties are cut in one way or another, positive or negative.

So you just had a spirit that’s been attached to you removed, or that tie to a spirit has been cut. You may have taken some heavy astral damage and your physical body is feeling the ramifications. You feel great at first, perhaps a little emotional, perhaps your adrenaline is high, but then you start to crash. Your stomach is churning, your head hurts, and you feel like throwing up. Oddly enough this is normal. It’s unlikely you will actually throw up, but it could happen. 

Despite it all you’re going to feel like shit for a while. When you wake up you may feel better, hollow, better. Sometimes this recovery takes days. Here is what you should do while in recovery.

Originally posted by drf-1

Hydrate

You’re feeling sick and you need water to live. Make sure you’re avoiding unhealthy stuff like soda or slushies. Try water and tea. Your body and spirit will thank you.

Fuel Up

When you’re recovering, I really wouldn’t recommend fast food, greasy foods, chips, excess candy, or otherwise anything unhealthy. Until you’re feeling like yourself again try consuming plants like vegetables or fruits. Maybe grilled fish or chicken. Salads are a good idea. Pizza is not.

Be Yourself

You just had a rough interaction with an entity that is not yourself. You need to regain that sense of self. Do something you love. Ride a bike, play your favorite video game, climb a tree. Just be. 

Rest

In order to recover your body and spirit need rest. You’ll need to take care of it all. Have a full 8 hours if you can and nap when tired throughout the day. Don’t let your sleep become excessive or too little. You need to find that balance.

Recharge

I’m specifically talking spiritually right now. Taking care of your physical body in turn helps you take care of your spiritual body. But you also need to take care of purely spiritual matters in order to fully relish in your physical body. Meditate, surround yourself with herbs or crystals. Drink tea, breathe cleansing concoctions. I like to light Sweet Grass, Sage, and Lavender together, personally. Take time to take care of your personal self.

And voila! You’re soon recovered and ready to live life like yourself again. The key to all of this is you’re trying to remove that last bit of energy, and it’s sitting negatively, and you should really let it leave your body. It’s making you feel sick and you don’t want to feed it with more negative stuff like alcohol, soda, fatty or greasy foods, etc. You want to give it all of the good stuff it needs to heal properly. 

“Come Dine With Me” competition!

For a lovable anon. Where I am from we actually don’t have “Come Dine With Me” show but we have similar “Tables set!” (Wikipedia says “Spread!“ but let me tell you that’s some ugly translation) For those of you who don’t know this show at all: You gather 5 amateur cooks and each day one of them hosts a dinner for everyone. Their rivals give them points (1-10) and after five days the person who has the most points wins some prize, usually money. The dinner consists of appetizer/soup, main dish, dessert, and an activity. (Yes, I know that it is usually appetizer followed by soup but listen, I’ve just came up with 20*3 unique meals and 20 activities. And speaking for myself, I have problem to fit into myself a dinner consisting of two dishes, so 4 feels too many.)
I had our leaders randomly (I used dice) sorted into groups of 5, so we will have 4 winners in the end.

Group1:

Vol’jin: Raptor egg soup, tiger-burger with mashed potatoes, exotic fruit salad with ice cream, and bone carving.
Thrall:
Spring rolls, beef goulash, 7 flavors rainbow pudding, and candle making.
Mekkatorque:
Garlic spread and spicy bread, scrambled eggs with sour cream and gammon, caramel cream puffs, and make-your-own-firework with later firework display.
Garrosh:
Spring carp soup, clefthoof kabob, Terokkar pine-nut cake, and Hine’n’Seek with his 37 ghost children (unintended).
Genn:
Tartare, slow cooked turkey with dumpling, various cupcakes, and cupcakes decorating.

Winner: Vol’jin. Warchief, more like Warchef.

Group2:

Falstad: Open (vegetarian) sandwiches, escalope of three meats with baby carrot, macaroon, and playing darts.
Baine:
Sweet corn seeds in spice, chicken tikka masala in flatbread, grilled fruit, and painting on leather.
Tyrande:
Spicy cinnamon rolls, sweet rice with pineapple and crunchy chicken bits, mascarpone cheese cakes, and beauty makeover.
Velen:
Small fruitcakes, jungle stew with bread, ice cream, and ice cream making.
Gallywix:
Creamy tomato soup, trout a la creme, tiramisu, and mini golf.

Winner: Gallywix. If you bitch about people’s cooking, you better be a good cook yourself, that’s his motto.

Group3:

Sylvanas: Mushroom cake, roasted lamb with stuffing-cooked-aside, olives and creme cheese in spring onion (presented as eyeballs), and mirror labyrinth.
Lor’themar:
Especially spicy devil clams, saffron-and-curry rice with sweet deer, various baked cheeses with cranberry sauce, and fire dancing.
Ji:
Ramen, noodles of thousand flavors and grilled vegetable, sweet rice cakes and Hearthstone tournament.
Muradin:
Thin mint-and-chocolate cookies, hare stew with potatoes and homemade cornbread, small grilled cheeseburgers, and ale tasting.
Aysa:
Sweet-and-sour chili soup, crispy breaded chicken strips with orange sauce, vegetable sushi rolls, and painting on silk shirts.

Winner: Lor’themar. The sweet victory was worth staying sober for five days straight.

Group4:

Anduin: Creamy fish soup, potato pancakes with beef, cheese fondue, and 5-man version of Jihui.
Varian:
Onion soup, pork tenderloin with pasta and spinach sauce, blueberry cheesecake, and opening champagne with a sword.
Moira:
Homemade pates with dwarven shortbread, sweet dumblings with strawberry stuffing, chocolate-vanilla butter roll, and visiting her lava-heated glasshouse.
Taedal:
Radish salad with sour goat cheese, skewered warp stalker bits and exotic fruit, open sandwich (danish style), and pearl-hunt diving.
Lady Deathwhisper:
Gazpacho, risotto with four meats, frozen cream puff ball surprise (varying flavor and a nut inside), and ice sculpting.

Varian: Hold on, hold on. Lady Deathwhisper? What is she doing here?
Lady Deathwhisper:
You see, there was one competitor needed for this group and the Lich King thought the Scourge should be… More positively represented.
Lady Deathwhisper:
And Kel’thuzad is a miserable cook, so…

Winner: Anduin. The living proof that less sometimes means more and simple and traditional is always good.

20 Q Meme

Tagged! by @randommomentsdevida – I don’t do these often, but since she asked so nicely…

Rules: Answer 20 questions and tag 20 followers you would like to get to know better.

Name: Cranquis. Doctor Cranquis.

Nickname: Cranquis (or cran-kiss if you think you’re hilarious… you know who you are)

Zodiac Sign: superstitious poffle

Height: 0.00098747 nautical miles

Ethnicity: Passion Fruit

Orientation: All up in my Mrs’ grill

Favourite Fruit(s): Cherries, nectarines, persian melons, pears, honeycrisp apples, plums, mangos (note: I can only eat one of these raw without getting swollen lips)

Favourite Season: Football

Favourite Book(s): Richard Scarry, the Bible

Favourite Flower(s): ok let’s go with the tiger lily 

Favourite Animal(s): meerkats, ferrets, otters (sea/river), essentially long twisty mammals 

Favourite Beverage: beer of the root, pink grapefruit juice

Average Hours of Sleep: 7

Favourite Fictional Characters: me 

Number of Blankets You Sleep with: 2 +/- 1

Dream Trip: Quebec City/PEI/Newfoundland – went once as a teen, gotta return someday

Blog Created: 2010, right around birth of my first Cranquis Boy

Number of Followers: oh. hadn’t checked that number in a while. well, that’s quite humbling. thanks, all y’all.

I’m tagging: donald trump. you know his favorite book answer is gonna be hilarious no matter what. the 19 other people = @anyoneelsewhofeelslikeit