green hunters

a time bureau spin off show, but it’s a comedy

  • rip wants to keep up a Front of the building being owned by a legitimate business so he makes a fake one and puts gary in charge of pr/social media
    • spoiler alert: gareth green is terrible with technology and their cover almost gets blown like five times
  • ava and eve as the Lesbian Life Goals
    • rip: how is it that the two people with the worst people skills are the ones getting laid the most
      gary: aw, that sucks, director hunter. if it helps, i don’t get laid either.
      rip: that’s in inappropriate discussion topic, mr. green
      gary: oh, uh, i’m sorry
      rip: but seriously, what are they doing that i’m not—don’t respond to that mr. green, that’s not a conversation for the workplace—is the hair? do people miss my beard? it could stand to be longer. people find scruff attractive, right, mr. green? no, that’s not something i should be asking a subordinate—but maybe it’s been long enough that i can try to find a lover again. i mean, it’s been five years. maybe jonah’s still available, haven’t seen him in ages—don’t ask who that is, we shouldn’t be having this discussion.
      gary, crying: i don’t know what you want from me.
    • rip does invite jonah over one day. he’s just so proud of the time bureau and he Has to Share It
      • gary, a Known Gay: and who’s he?
        rip: off limits if you want to keep your job.
    • gary works under ava a lot and accidentally considers her a friend even though She Surely Doesn’t
      • he booked a date with a guy but uh turns out he promised a double date and eve and ava are the only other couple he knows
      • gary, to his date, nervously: and this is my, uh, mom, ava and—
        gary: hah, did i say mom, i meant mom’s gym coach. h-hot gym coach.
        (rip taught him that one)
  • gary: wilbur, you’re a wise old man, can you help me out?
    wilbur, who has never given helpful advice in his entire life: yes, i am old [walks away]
  • “the legends did that once” is code for “you can probably get away with doing that”
  • ava: has anyone seen director hunter?
    gary: he’s probably sobbing in his office again
    eve: what
    wilbur: he does that sometimes
  • gary Fucks Something Up and keeps going higher and higher the chain of command trying to Fix It but It’s Bad
    • aka “don’t tell rip”
    • rip walks in on them and gary, without hesitation, wipes his memory.
      gary: I PANICKED
      rip, coming to again: what—
      gary: AHHH [hits him with That Sweet Regression Gun again]
  • rip, seeing his new recruits: so youthful. so full of life
    rip: can’t wait to beat that out of them

One thing about the company Roosterteeth that makes me super happy is the diverstiy in body image throughout their casts and crew. And nobody is shamed or looked down on for not being society’s idea of normal.

You’ve got people like Blaine, Aaron, James, Bruce, and Alan who are all in really good condition, physically fit, and workout often. And then you have the guys and gals who have recently started to improve themselves like Michael, Ryan, Meg, Josh, and Zach. And nobody told them to do it, they did it for themselves. Burnie talked a lot about his process to lose weight,and did a damn good job of it. Look at him five or six years ago as opposed to now. Goddamn. Hell, three of the five I’ve mentioned made a show about it, and happily encourage others advice and support if the community wants to work alongside them.

Not all of Roosterteeth is fit though. Obviously, not everyone wants to be super toned, drink protein and watch their carb intake. (Not that any of that is bad, I do it myself.) There’s a huge array of body types at RT. Many of them are happy with who they are, comfortable in their own bodies, and are proud of themselves. Sure, Jack gets lots of shit for his weight, but he takes it stride, and laughs and jokes about it himself. That man is the living embodiment of sunshine, large or not. Don’t forget Lindsay, who takes more than her fair share of insults about her weight and looks. But she’s one of the nicest and happiest people I’ve ever seen in camera. And as I mentioned before, Zach Anner, a disabled man has incredible self worth. Incredible. He takes his disability in stride. And still seeks to improve himself.

Nobody at RT is the same. Every single person is unique. Several of the people at RT have awesome hair colors, tattoos (looking at you Geoff), or differing seuxalities than their peers. And they’ve never shown anything but support for their fanbase regarding those things.

Got tattoos? Great. No tattoos? Awesome. Red hair? Green hair? Pink Hair? No hair? Perfect, get to work. Like girls? Boys? Both? None? Cool, come watch this new video we put out. Thin? Not thin? Muscular? Come help set up this new stunt that Blaine’s gonna get naked in.

Nobody is made fun of because of their weight, ability to workout, or lack thereof, hair color, or sexuality. At the company or in in the community. Are there people in the community that are assholes? Absolutely. But these people I watch nearly every day of my life have taught me a lesson. You can look however you want. Be whomever you want. And be happy with yourself.

And I have to thank the Roosterteeth company for teaching me not to hate the fact that I’m not perfect. That with a little bit of work, I can be who I want to be, or just even just be me.