gots to brag

D&D a week ago: We’re very proud that Daenerys’ council of allies is mostly women. We’ve got an older woman, women of color, queer women. It’s great.

D&D now: They’re all dead, except Yara who has been kidnapped and tortured so that Theon can save her.

My favorite headcannon is that Jack has an amazing singing voice and he doesnt even know it.

One day when they’re driving in the car, Bitty has his Sappiest Love Songs Ever playlist going, and Jack’s hitting every note in If I Ain’t Got You. By now Bitty knows Jack can sing, so he posts a video of Jack just going at it on his twitter. The offical Falcs account retweets it. Lin-Manuel Miranda retweets it. Bad Bob retweets it with a “He definitely got that one from his mother”. #WhatThePuckZimmermann is trending #1. The world absolutely loves that this big, quiet, awkward hockey bro also belts it out to sappy love songs on long drives, and Bitty is so proud they finally get to see a part of the real Jack.

I would like to take a moment to imagine lance and shiro at a gym

Cause I strongly believe shiro would be the only one working out while lance runs around with peanut butter and banana protein shake and a sweat band bragging about shiro

“Yeah you see that guy with the swanky six pack benching 200 lbs? Yeah I bang that.”

anonymous asked:

nah, hogwarts houses are abt what a character values. lance is a slytherin hes got so much ambition and values it. keith values found fam a lot but hes really closed off, sorting hat would be split between gryff or huff. pidge is slytherin through and through, broke into the garrison. hunks a gryff bc like, balmera and hes really blunt. shiro is a hufflepuff for sure "patience yields focus". coran is ravenclaw head. alluras... idk hatstall seems legit but she would ask for gryff

Anon, you get me :’)

I apologize for the long-ass response below, I just like 2 talk.

  • Lance went into Hogwarts wanting to be a Gryffindor bc he’s a half-blood or muggleborn who has only ever heard abt how badass/heroic Gryffs are (the HP universe is biased towards Gryffs okay don’t argue with me on this). Lance got off the train bragging about how he’d be in Gryffindor only for the Sorting Hat to shout out ‘SLYTHERIN’ the second it touched his head. 
    • Lance held up the entire class for a good three minutes because he was arguing w the Sorting Hat lmfaoooooo however Lance realized Slytherins were ballers by the second day and he now has an intense amount of house pride.
  • Keith is very similar to Lance in that he always figured he’d be a Gryffindor?? Like, people would always tell him ‘oh you’re a Gryff for sure’ and Keith would just shrug and go along with it, but deep down something didn’t really… fit. Because Keith is many things. He can be reckless and impulsive and oftentimes relies more on instinct than logic, but that doesn’t automatically translate into bravery. Keith doesn’t think of himself as a hero.
    • So when he got to the Sorting Hat 11yo Keith was sort of… resigned to his fate. He was very, “Let’s get this over with.” Which the Hat noticed. And the Hat knocked on his head and said, “What do you want?”
    • The thing Keith wants, above all, is a family. But he’d never admit that out loud. Fortunately, the Sorting Hat is some omnipotent being who can hear all your thoughts (for better or for worse), so it sent Keith to Hufflepuff, where he could be with his brother (Shiro). 
    • The idea was, Shiro’s the one best-suited for helping Keith come out of his shell, Shiro is loved by his House, so through him Hufflepuff can learn to love Keith. This plan kind of worked out?? Like Keith sometimes refuses to meet Hufflepuff halfway, but it’s a work-in-progress.
  • Pidge is a Slytherin like y’all… Lance and Pidge are bona fide Slytherins, through and through. Pidge actually broke tradition with her House placement because the Holts are like a… legendary Ravenclaw family. I like to believe it’s because Pidge actually takes more after her mom than her dad, at least in terms of personality LOL.
    • People often assume loving your family is strictly a one House kind of thing (Hufflepuff) but?? There are nuances. I’ll try to explain it by highlighting the differences between Keith and Pidge. In season 1, Pidge tries to leave the team so she can find her dad/brother, because to Pidge family trumps everything. Keith, however, understands that there’s no point in saving your family if you let another family die. Keith basically values all lives equally (or at least in theory). So in an ironic moment, it seems like the Hufflepuff is more pragmatic than the Slytherin, lol.
    • Slytherin demands ambition, loyalty, and a stubborness that’ll carry you through any challenge. Lance is an ambitiously loyal Slytherin, while Pidge is a loyally stubborn one.
  • Again, Hunk is a student who went into Hogwarts with preconceived expectations. Like, Hunk is the Neville Longbottom of this story. He grew up with other wizarding kids who never stfu about the bravery of Gryffindor, the power of Slytherin, the brilliance of Ravenclaw, and the kindness of Hufflepuff. And Hunk, well. He didn’t think of himself as particularly brave, or powerful, or brilliant (even though he literally has 10/10 In All Of Those), but he did value kindness, and he tried to be kind every day. So, y’know, Hunk thought he was a shoe-in for Hufflepuff.
    • HE’S NOT. MY BOY IS A GRYFFINDOR. Here’s the cheesy answer: there is bravery and strength in being kind. There is wisdom in being kind. Kindness for the sake of kindness is the greatest virtue of all.
    • Here’s the realistic answer: Hunk is a goddamn mountain of a person. He is the man who can’t be moved. Can you out stubborn a rock?? No. Can you out-crush a rock?? No. 
    • Hunk isn’t brave because he wants to be a hero. Hunk is brave because, when others are in trouble, someone has to do something. Hunk is brave because he is too kind and too gentle to be anything but.
  • People are always surprised when Shiro reveals he’s a Hufflepuff because he seems like a model Gryffindor. He’s a leader, he’s calm under pressure, he’s a hero. That just screams Gryff… right?
    • In case you haven’t realized, the moral of this story is that You Don’t Have To Be A Lion To Be A Hero.
    • Shiro’s explanation is going to be kind of short bc I’m more of a casual ‘yeah, he’s a Huff’ kind of person. Shiro is basically the Cedric Diggory of this au in more ways than one lol.
    • The gist of it is that Shiro is just this kind dude who isn’t in it for glory but rather to just?? Pull through?? If everyone is alive and only mildly traumatized at the end of the day, that’s a win in Shiro’s book. In terms of like, survival, Gryffindors are more jump into action, Slytherins and Ravenclaws make a detailed plan, and Hufflepuffs know to take things one day at a time.

Tbfh I am too tired to analyze Allura and Coran but ur right anon in that Allura is a 15-minute hat stall who chose to go to Gryffindor (like her pops!!!!). Coran is the Head of Ravenclaw (or slotted to be, maybe the human equivalent of the Green Lion is the Head rn. I don’t know or really care).

Anyway I’m going to end this post here so I can go get dinner. Good yard everyone.

Lava

Based off this video because I cannot stop laughing


It had started out as a simple enough dare, Dean and Cas would each get a total of 3 tries per person to try and “kill” the other by telling the other that “the floor is lava.” They would then have five seconds before they had to find a way to get off the ground and scream that the floor was lava to any unsuspecting passerby if there were anyway. There was no prize, not really. Dean just really wanted to beat Cas at something, and Cas didn’t mind if he got bragging rights.

Cas had been first, during a walk in the park between their two college classes on campus. “The floor is lava,” he’d casually said. Dean had not understood until he did, and at which point he only had 3 seconds left and nothing that he could use to get off the ground. Nothing, except, for a trashcan just up the trail. He’d made it with one second to spare.

“The floor is lava!” Dean screamed triumphantly, balancing precariously on the poor trashcan below him. He had managed to get into a crouch before the inevitable happened––when Dean went to get down back onto the ground and rejoin Cas he slipped and wound up wedging his butt straight into the trashcan. Castiel wouldn’t let him forget it for a week.

The next turn had been Dean’s, choosing to wait until Cas and he were on a grocery run to enact his plan.

“Hey, Cas,” he called the other’s attention while they were in the toilet paper aisle. 

“Hm?”

“The floor is lava.” 

Keep reading

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So I’m torn between wanting to hide under my covers vs. wanting to trip over the waste basket whilst dancing around like a jackass in my bathroom, because apparently I got a few nominations for the Shrieking Shack Society’s Marauders Medals Awards and I am a mess??!!!

Palo Alto was nominated for Best AU, Watch Me was nominated for Best Smut, and I was nominated for Best Veteran Author.

Voting will be open on 1 October, so keep your eye out for the link and more info. Thank you so much to @shayalonnie, @jencala and the rest of the Shrieking Shack Society for all the hard work they put into these gorgeous icons and, of course, the nominating and voting process. And thank you all so much for reading my stuff! Just being nominated is such an honor, and I’m so happy and excited to be a part of such a supportive fandom! <3 <3 <3 

Hetalia Dodgeball
  • Italy: hides behind Germany, manages to stay in the game a while by just running away
  • Germany: one of the last men standing, takes it way too seriously and kind of scares everyone else because he throws really hard
  • Japan: stays in the game for a long time because he's good at catching balls, but he's not as good at throwing them so he doesn't help his team much
  • America: accidentally knocks someone out because he doesn't know his own strength, leaves to go help the person who got k.o'd
  • England: brags about how well he's going to do then gets hit in the face almost immediately and trudges off, cursing and muttering about how he wasn't ready and this game is stupid
  • France: decent at dodging but can't catch or throw much, stays in the game on a similar strategy to Italy but without a Germany to hide behind
  • Russia: made the case that if he hit the ball with his face hard enough that it bounced back to the other side and hit someone else, it should count as catching it--got out because the rest of the world didn't see it that way
  • China: gets out after catching a few and making a couple of good throws because he's slow to get out of the way of balls he can't catch
  • Canada: is the person America knocked out
  • Prussia: as overly invested as his brother, but louder about it, gets out when he takes a little too much time to brag about that awesome throw he just made
  • Austria: pretends to be hurt so he doesn't have to play
  • Spain: having a really good time, not the first or the last to get out and makes one really good throw, cheers on his team loudly once he's out
  • Romano: didn't want to play in the first place, got dragged there and actually really enjoyed himself for about 1 minute before getting out, at which point he goes back to grumbling and cussing about how stupid this game is and how he didn't want to be here
  • Hungary: as good at this game as Germany, better at still having fun and remembering that it's a game not a damn war

i went to a film student party for the first time abd like?? started out standing quietly by a trashcan w a friends girlfriend but ended up making a new friend, talking abt shared religion w one of the hosts (who was giving out free shots?) and being invited over for tea by the new friend so tonight was a success all around

Fire boy and Ice Ice baby

After a while in the fandom, i was in the mindset of “ Hey but it makes perfect sense for Keith to be fire and Lance to be water
Because they blue and red ahah”

But then,

Actually it’s more than that : listen ;

Because at first, honestly :

Lance’s bright, loud personnality ScrEAms fire to me. A true good Leo. He got the bragging, the look, the style, the lead thingy. He’s a shiny sparkle. He lights the mood and he throws tantrums sometimes.

Keith’s calm, arms crossed while leaning against a wall silent is a Signature™ move for him, he’s rather cold at first. He’s a lonely broody boy. He relies on instinct more than skill, apparently. 
And if he’s actually a scorpio it’s bonus round for making Him : WATERBOY.

But then we had “Keith’s a hothead” and some Insecure™ Lance, added to a whole lot of battles.

And while Fighting actually, Keith litterally jumps in the fire. Like, really, litterally, the boy straight dived from a cliff to a burning village. He’s never gonna stop until he runs out of things to punch. He goes for the face. He’s fast, and well… Burns. He’s all emotionnal about fighting, barely thinking before throwing a punch.

On the other hand, Lance’s pretty cool headed while under fire. He sats down and look around, reason differently depending on his teammates, wait and he’s silent as needed. He keeps cool. He’s fluid and doesn’t stop the mission but he never really bursted in them either. He’s what you need to make things flow.

His Bayard’s a long ranged one. More on the protection side, he’s a support. He can reach everywhere, we’ll see this.

Keith’s bayard is a Sword. It progresses little by little, piece by piece, tearing down anything at its fast pace. It’s deadly but only to what touches it, to what encounters it directly. It propagates.
Across a battlefield, Keith is a raging fire propagating.

Have you seen those rainy tragic moments of warzones movies ? Rain’s everywhere. In the ocean, every single person, ally or enemy, has their feet in water.
Water flows. It saves, protects, covers and drown, but everywhere at the same time. Funny how only some kind of rifles-like weapons can relate to this omnypresence and versatility on battlefield ?

So in battle, they meet up fire & ice/water expectations ; ( more under the cut because this is getting long).

Keep reading

shit woops it’s gon be my bday soon, I forgot those things were annual 

I worked on my S2 Science project on my own at home for an upwards of nine hours (the actual time spent was 7 hours at home and 1 hour 40 mins in school) and brought it in on an USB stick because my Science was awful.

(She spelt the word forest like ‘forset’, got corrected, spelt it ‘foreset’ and then had the most idiotic kid in class come and fix it for her).

Everyone, even my friends, got mad at me for bragging about how much time I spent on it. I only spent that long because I had heard that they would be sorting our classes based on the quality of the work.

Guess what?

THEY JUST RANDOMIZED THE CLASSES AGAIN INSTEAD OF SETTING THEM BASED ON ABILITY! I SPENT ALL THAT TIME FOR NOTHING!

And they haven’t even gave me back my USB stick.

Arkham Asylum Survival Tips.

This is from my decaying Quotev account. I wrote this so long ago now, but I thought it might be fun to put it up here.

Arkham Asylum survival tips.
As you know there are do’s and do nots to incarceration at Arkham here are some for a slight chance of survival.

Do not think singing the Batman theme song is going to result in any thing other than a painful expierance.

Touch Dr Crane’s books at your own risk.

Asking Edward Nygma if he wants to talk about his ‘daddy issues’ isn’t smart he will kill you.

Telling Deathstroke that Deadpool would totally kick his ass is grounds for immediate medication for talking about fictional characters again.

Flirting with Joker is a new level of stupid but be prepared for a blonde crazed Brooklyn women to try and kill you.

If you should escape and get access to the rogue’s confiscated weapons unless you hundred percent know what your doing don’t touch them and even then it’s likely they will hunt you down and kill you for the inconvenience.

Asking Bane who his dealer is isn’t going to get you any venom.

Please stop asking Copperhead if she can teach you swear words in Spanish, we do have Spanish speaking inmates and doctors it’s not a secret way to insult people.

Yes, Dr Crane is not the strongest person here this isn’t a go ahead to try and dominate him if he doesn’t get you back straight away then I’d suggest sleeping with one eye open for the foreseeable future.

If Edward Nygma should take a disliking to you giving him some puzzle books on the side isn’t entirely a bad idea.

Threatening ivy with weed killer doesn’t scare her, her ‘babies’ are quite capable of looking after their selves.

Trying to persuade Selina Kyle to curl up in your lap like a kitten is your own funeral.

Shouting 'CROWS’ around Jonathan Crane just to try and scare him is going to result in a frightening death.

Asking Victor Zsasz to cut your food up for you is inviting trouble.

Asking Waylon Jones where captain hook is, will most likely end up with you missing body parts.

Touch Osito and you risk being broken.

Singing twisted fire starter at firefly may seem funny to you but God help you if he starts one.

Asking Edward Nygma what’s green, purple and black and regularly gets his ass handed to him by Batman is seriously stupid.

Telling Edward Nygma that he can use his Cain on you anytime he wants doesn’t sound sexual he will take you literally.

Asking if Crane wants a new test subject doesn’t sound sexual either he’ll gladly take you up on the offer.

Playing music aloud is permitted as one of your recreational activities but please be mindful of what you play as the last time someone played Justin Bieber aloud a fire broke out, a bomb went off, Bane smashed through two walls and Jarvis tried to initiate a flash mob.

Telling Harley you want to joke and fool around with her is in affect volunteering your head for a game of croquette.

Telling Jonathan crane that he is the grim reaper is only going to give him an ego boost.

Singing I’ve got a brand new combine harvester around Pamela isn’t wise.

If your not afraid of bombs then by all means scream capitalism on the top of your voice around Anarchy.

If you should be unlucky enough to draw the attentions of Jarvis Tetch then it is best advised to inform a doctor or guard and not to tell him your the reincarnation of the red queen or the jabberwocky he’ll take this just as seriously.

Asking any of the female prisoners for nudes may be asking for your phone to explode.

Telling Harley Quinn that vampires aren’t as good as werewolves will put you into a no exit lifelong debate.

Trying to flirt with any of the doctors and asking them if they want to start a 'mad love’ will mean that your doctors may have to be switched to the same gender as you and if you still persist then we will be forced to only use video connection to speak with you.

Asking Batman to bite you so you can join his legion of the undead is going to result in a neck brace.

Shouting to the Batmobile might end up with you being chucked under it.

If there is a break out it is advised to stay in your cell for your own safety and not to try to form teams of your favourite rogues.

Don’t think it’s funny calling Penguin happy feet or Mary Poppins.

Neither is calling officer Boyles Scarface.

Starting sleeve fights with your straight jacket is not their intended purpose.

Cash’s hook is not a kitchen utensil.

Although movies are permitted in recreational time there are some rules to when certain films can be shown as different inmates are effected by different things.

Neither of the Silent hill movies are allowed when Dr. Crane is present.
Silence of the lambs is not permitted when Waylon Jones is present.
Stephen King’s It isn’t allowed around Joker.

The Saw franchise isn’t allowed around Edward Nygma, he doesn’t need encouragement.

Tim Burton’s Alice in wonderland isn’t allowed when Jarvis Tetch is around, this should be common sense.

Most violence filled movies aren’t permitted around Zsasz, you don’t really need anything to trigger him.

If you find that Dr. Crane is taking a frequent interest in your personal fears and phobias you should immediately tell a guard or doctor and not tell him stupid made up fears and phobias as if he finds out that your lying he’ll make it his personal mission to make you frightened of your own lies.

It’s best to humour Joker when he asks if you want to know how he got his scars?.

Bragging about animal abuse is not only grounds for time being taken away from your recreational time but you may incur abuse from some of the animal loving inmates.

Instigating wheelchair races is not the purpose of the wheelchairs and is strictly prohibited.

Telling Jarvis that the ghost of Arkham is watching him sleep will earn you solitary confinement.

Writing riddles on the walls and then trying to blame Edward isn’t clever, because he will pick so many holes in your argument and ridicule you so savagely that your likely to end up developing a self inferiority complex.

Trying to steal Osito to sleep with at night isn’t going to end well. For anyone.

Please refrain from stealing medication as we regret to inform you that we believe some of them may have been tampered with, if you begin to laugh uncontrollably, start to feel that Jarvis is making sense or ten foot cockroaches are stampeding through the halls please tell a doctor or guard.

Asking two face to flip a coin for every mundane decision you make is eventually going to end up with your life being determined by a fifty fifty probability.

Telling Jarvis that the Grudge is looking for him is again not acceptable.

There are some patients that suffer from insomnia and stress induced sleep deprivation, if said patients happen to fall asleep then leave them alone it isn’t your place to be as loud as you possibly can to try and wake them up, it’s not just really annoying but it could result in them taking it out on the first person to wake them up, so just make sure it’s not you.

We would appreciate it if everyone who frequents the gym to stop trying to get Bane and Waylon to lift increasingly heavy weights, it always ends in competitions turning into fights.

Male inmates who try to sneak into the female showers please keep in mind that the last time this happened his remains was recovered from the drainage system.

And in relation any female inmates who try to sneak into the male showers…are actually non existent, seriously no one wants to go in there. O_O

Please check your personal toiletries before using them, apparently Joker and Harley has an ongoing bet to see which one of them can dye the most people’s hair.

Trying to play whack a mole on the other patient with Harley’s hammer is strictly prohibited.

Please refrain from laughing at Riddler’s green hair, it is being resolved. :?

The rumours aren’t true there isn’t going to be a 'trick or treating crazies field trip’ please try to remember your here for your own rehabilitation.

Hair dryers are very welcome but trying to thaw out Mr. Freeze with them is not.

Please remember that giving medication forms into the doctors that have been signed by either Harleen Quinzel, Jonathan Crane or Hugo Strange are not valid they are patients their selves, there are reasons to why they can no longer practice.

Trying to show Jarvis Alice madness returns the game is strongly discouraged.

please do not touch Nightmare or Craw.

No, you can not have your straight jackets in sparkly pink.

Upon apprehension some patients may have their own personal work on their person, trying to plagiarise or copy their life’s work is going to end up you experiencing the product of their work firsthand.

Please use the doors and not make new exits.

Your sinking to a new level if you ask Mr. Freeze 'is your wife giving you the cold shoulder?’.

Deprive people of caffeine at your own risk.

Music Meister will not sing for you, why would you even want him to?

Killer moth isn’t going to follow laser pointers, he only dresses like a moth.

Touch Harley’s J necklace at your own cost.

The spinach in the canteen is not part kryptonite, and if your stupid enough to try and throw it at superman as a deterrent then on your head be it.

Detective J'onn johnz is not an alien.

No, Vicky vale doesn’t want an exclusive interview with you.

Jack Ryder might have published a paper on his triumph over Floyd Lawton but Deadshot says otherwise.

No you can’t phone Amanda Weller with your phone privileges and ask her to 'sign me up for the suicide squad!“.

Robin doesn’t have to sign in as a minor, stop insisting he does.

Bruce Wayne will not adopt you.

Music Meister will not serenade you, he might perforate your eardrums but he won’t serenade you.

Joker really doesn’t like cream pies in the face, who knew?

No you can’t use Zsasz as a living tally chart board when your playing pool, he might return the favour.

Deathstroke will not teach you some 'really cool Army shit!’ He could possibly demonstrate some 'really cool Army shit!’ On you but he won’t teach you.

The last person to sing Miley Cyrus’s wreaking ball actually ended up squashed by one, I have no idea how they pulled it off but they did, really creatively too.

Yes security levels at Wal-Mart are better, we all know.

Ichobod is not Jonathan’s real name.

Green arrow isn’t looking for maid Marian.

And no he’s not from the legend of Zelda either.

It’s quite easy to swipe Boles’s burbon. Just don’t tell him I told you.

Trying to lift Catwoman up like the lion king isn’t going to work.

Oswald isn’t pingu.

No you can’t redecorate your cell, it’s not meant to be homely.

Bribing the staff isn’t advised but we all know you could probably get away with it.

Batman isn’t into BDSM.

Ra’s al ghul isn’t going to die if you throw salt at him, you might though.

please be kind, I know it’s not the best written piece in the world. I’m resitting my English and maths and trying to improve by writing the subjects I like.