Theresa ‘strong and stable’ May: “People talk about the sort of Brexit that there is going to be - is it hard, soft, is it grey, white - actually, we want a red white and blue Brexit. That is the right Brexit for the United Kingdom.”
John Oliver and every rational person left on Earth: “But what does that mean? You’re heading into a negotiation that will set the course for Britain for generations, and you’re naming colours on the fucking flag? Forget running through fields of wheat - that must be the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever said. And actually, you know what - I apologize to that guy from before - I said there was literally no worse way to discuss this than with cheese, but I was not counting on Thatcher in the Rye here answering a policy question with a fucking colour scheme.”
you fall for her slowly. it’s like waking up in sunlight, an encompassing warmth. she has soft hands. you hold them so often you know where each callous is.
she laughs at your jokes and you vow to get funnier, wittier, so you can hear more of that angelic sound. she makes you blueberry pancakes and you’ve never liked blueberries or pancakes but for some reason every last bite is delicious. she has three tattoos hidden under her clothes and just as many outrageous stories about why she got them.
you love her, you realize. you tell her, hiding your trembling nervousness. she smiles and says she knows, and that she loves you too.
it shouldn’t be possible, but you keep falling harder for her, for that girl with sun-bleached hair and fiery eyes, the girl who holds you after nightmares, who kisses you like each time is her last chance to.
finally, you slip a ring on her finger, and when she finds her voice, she says she’ll wear it forever.
At fifteen, Kasamatsu was lanky,awkward, and way more angry at the world than he should. Honestly, he was doing well at school, played basketball, and successfully kept his younger brothers
from becoming arsonists, but he was a teenager, and he was angry. Because he had zits, because he couldn’t talk to girls,
because his band was never going to be famous, or even leave Moriyama’s garage,
for that matter. Hell, because his cereal turned too saggy one day while he
jerked off three times during one
shower – just because he was a teenager.
Mostly because he was two hundred
percent gay, though, and beginning to think he would die a virgin, since the
only guy whose gaydar seemed to be working, and steering him in Yukio’s general
direction was a thirteen-year-old with perfect skin, and the tendency to
embarrass him in public, by using the same cheap tricks on him as he did on all
the older girls that found him and his dubious seduction techniques so cute.
“Senpai, you look tired,” drawled
Kise, flashing a dazzling grin that even Kasamatsu recognized as a force to be
He only rolled his eyes, too
exhausted after the basketball practice to even scold that brat for basically
stalking him after school, and tried to bypass Kise, who promptly followed.
“Probably because you’ve been
running through my mind all day,” he added flirtatiously, batting his
can we just picture les amis in a parks and rec type scenario for a second
enjolras as the low-level, overzealous government employee who wants to change the world one park at a time and make a real ~difference in the city he loves so dearly (just think of him channeling all his love for the entire country of france into a tiny midwestern speck in the middle of nowhere. terrifying.)
combeferre as the male nurse who showed up at town meeting to complain about the pit next to his house, only to be swept up in enjolras’ well-intentioned hijinks that somehow never end with the pit getting filled.
courfeyrac as combeferre’s ex boyfriend, aka the poor sap who fell into the pit and kickstarted everything. to be fair, he was too busy drunkenly screaming showtunes to realize he’d walked into his neighbor’s backyard instead of his own, so it just made sense to cut across the empty pit lot to get home. aspiring broadway star, currently the frontman of ‘way, way off broadway,’ a band that plays queen-style rock songs of famous broadway songs.
jehan as the angsty, poetic intern who doesn’t do anything they’re asked and is more likely to be found reciting sonnets in a flat voice while facing the corner than doing any sort of paperwork.
grantaire as a lovely mix of ben and ron- secretly nerdy, slightly alcoholic, very cynical, and fierce hater of all things government. ended up the director of the parks department when the last guy ran out screaming after the fifth consecutive day jehan got their weird friend bahorel to hide under his desk and scream every time he answered the phone. the department was desperate, and grantaire was broke. he’s not even entirely sure that he’s qualified for the job.
eponine as enjolras’ right hand woman (and office buddy!) who can’t seem to stop hitting on combeferre for more that five seconds at a time. means well, but is constantly getting distracted by the outrageous business plans that jeanralphio!montparnasse keeps throwing her way. she may have gotten out of her parent’s shady businesses and took a cushy (boring) government job for his little brother’s sake, but she’s still got her father’s deadly charm and love for all things outrageous. owns a ridiculous amount of killer suits.
cosette as the bubbly and adorable state auditor who wears a lot of pink and can viciously slash a department’s budget down to next to nothing. she breaks the news with a smile so sad that you end up consoling her. she ends up staying in pawnee after falling for marius, the obvious jerry of this headcanon.
musichetta is most definitely donna. the two guys who keep showing up at the office for nooners are the subject of pretty much the only gossip city hall sees. it’s a small town, okay?
enjolras and r, after years of screaming at each other about the true meaning of government, finally come to an understanding (meaning, R is just absolutely floored by what a wonderful person E is and it makes him want to do anything to help him achieve his dreams.) their first kiss is during the harvest festival planning, when R brings E waffles after an all-nighter at the office. E is so delirious (and hopped up on energy drinks) that he just kind of goes for it. he tastes like whipped cream. it’s pretty much the greatest thing ever.
(the marriage of the penguins was absolutely a statement, by the way.)
Don’t Run,.. I Love You by Midnightview w/ Kimbra (Download)
Well I’ll say damn With an ass like that Can’t get you off my mind With a smile like yours You’ve got me hypnotize You’re outrageous, you’re contagious I love you I know I just met you But please don’t pass me by
Don’t run, I love you Don’t run, I love you Don’t run, I love you Don’t run, I love you
At night I sit and stare at stars And wonder just where you are
You’re outrageous, you’re contagious You’re the only thing that’s on my mind I know I just met you But please don’t pass me by
Don’t run, I love you Don’t run, I love you Don’t run, I love you Don’t run, I love you
You should totally write a cherik the proposal au fic. I've been looking for one of those for forever (cherik just seems perfect for it) and I can't seem to find any. I love your writing style and I just know that if you decide to one day write one, you'd totally do it justice. it's just a suggestion, feel free to ignore me :) but i do meant what i said. i love you and the way you write.
The Proposal AU? Oh, no, I couldn’t possibly take on another AU.
Obviously Erik would be the grouchy demanding boss and Charles the snarky assistant. Probably something like a mutant legal aid office rather than a publisher.
I have so much on my plate right now, between The Mutant Games and my original writing and my (yeah, guess what?) internship at a small publisher, not to mention my actual job.
They’re threatening to deport Erik back to Germany and Charles agrees to go along with this sham engagement in exchange for Erik taking on a client he had been planning to turn down. They go to New York for Charles’s big family Christmas to introduce Erik to the family, including his distant alcoholic mother, his sour and abusive stepfather, beloved sister Raven, wacky Aunt Irene, and Moira, the ex left behind.
So you see even though I really love this idea I coULDN’T POSSIBLY ACCIDENTALLY WRITE SOMETHING LIKE THEM GETTING CAUGHT UNDER THE MISTLETOE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FAMILY PARTY.
(I know there’s no mistletoe in the original but I feel like it makes more sense than your relatives randomly demanding you kiss and anyway I have a weakness for mistletoe.)
“I’m Jewish,” Erik said feebly.
“And mistletoe is pagan,” Aunt Irene said brightly. “Probably. Or something. Come now, sonny, you wouldn’t deny an old woman the joy of seeing young love in action?”
“But you can’t see!” Erik got an outraged elbow-jab from Charles for that one.
Aunt Irene just chuckled. “What I can see is the very high probability of you doing what I want, just to shut me up.”
“You don’t need to see the future for that,” Sharon muttered, “just the past.”
“And after all, Erik,” Charles said, voice laced with warning, “it’s not like we don’t kiss all the time anyway.”
Right. Because they were engaged. In love. In the version of reality they were feeding Charles’s family, Erik had every right to bend his neck and press his lips to Charles’s soft luscious pink ones, had assumedly done it many times before, and done other things besides. Which was a… compelling thought.
“Fine then,” Erik said, before he could think better of it, and dipped his head for a brief peck.
He intended it to be a brief peck. Instead – acting entirely without his permission – his body leaned into the kiss, into the warmth of Charles’s mouth, the surprising sweetness with which Charles returned the kiss. He felt Charles’s fingers trying to interlace with his, and let them in without a thought.
Then Charles pulled back, a loss Erik was ill-prepared for, and was rolling his eyes and lifting their clasped hands to shake in the air like a sign of victory. His assembled relatives cheered and catcalled, even Sharon setting down her glass to clap – everyone but sour-faced Kurt, whom Erik was just as happy to annoy.
“All right, tradition satisfied, et cetera, et cetera,” Charles said. “Raven, get over here and show me that baby bump!”
Erik exhaled slowly as conversations started up again, Charles and his sister chatting excitedly about her forthcoming offspring. It was several seconds before he remembered to release Charles’s hand.
When he did, it was just in time to see Aunt Irene winking at him. He smiled tightly and turned away, with the uncomfortable suspicion that the blind old lady had seen considerably more than he was comfortable with.