gorilla house

Reckless - Part 3

Part 3/?

Characters: AJ Styles, OFC, Baron Corbin

Summary: The newest woman on the roster finds herself making waves she never intended to, with men that are both off-limits to her.

Warnings: Smut

Previously: Part One | Part Two | Check out the Master List

Tagging: @llowkeys | @the-geekgoddes | @horcruxhunter5972 | @zombiexbody | @imtoldimbabe | @vebner37 | @justtrey19 | @nickysmum1909 | @taryndibiase | @stardust2012 | @alexahood21 | @lunaticqueen7 | @thephenomenonalkingofthebrogues | @tmriddler | @styl3sl0v3r | @itsnethbellins | @florenceivy | @blondekel77

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Unknown Quote Which Explains ME/CFS Well To Those Who Just Can’t Seem To Understand
—  “Acquiring a disability is a bit like getting home to find there’s a gorilla in your house. You contact the approved and official channels to get rid of infestations of wild animals (in this case, the NHS) and they umm and aah and suck air in through their teeth before saying something roughly equivalent to “what you've got ‘ere, mate, is a gorilla, and there ain’t really a lot what we can do about them, see…” before sending you back home to the gorilla’s waiting arms.

The gorilla in your house will cause problems in every part of your life. Your spouse may decide that (s)he can’t deal with the gorilla, and leave. Your boss may get upset that you’ve brought the gorilla to work with you and it’s disrupting your colleagues, who don’t know how to deal with gorillas. You’re arriving for work wearing a suit the gorilla has slept on. Some days you don’t turn up at all because at the last minute, the gorilla has decided to barricade you into the bathroom or sit on you so you can’t get out of bed. Your friends will get cheesed off because when you see them - which isn’t often, because they don’t want to come to your house for fear of the gorilla and the gorilla won’t always let you out - your only topic of conversation is this darn gorilla and the devastation it is causing.

There are three major approaches to the gorilla in your house.

One is to ignore it and hope it goes away. This is unlikely to work. A 300-lb gorilla will sleep where he likes, and if that’s on top of you, it will have an effect on you.

Another is to try and force the gorilla out, wrestling constantly with it, spending all your time fighting it. This is often a losing battle. Some choose to give all their money to people who will come and wave crystals at the gorilla, from a safe distance of course. This also tends to be a losing battle. However, every so often, one in a hundred gorillas will get bored and wander off. The crystal-wavers and gorilla-wrestlers will claim victory, and tell the media that it’s a massive breakthrough in gorilla-control, and that the 99 other gorilla-wrestlers just aren’t doing it right due to sloppy thinking or lack of commitment. The 99 other gorilla-wrestlers won’t have the time or energy to argue.

I have known people spend the best years of their life and tens of thousands of pounds trying to force their gorillas to go away. The tragedy is that even if it does wander off for a while, they won’t get their pre-gorilla lives back. They’ll be older, skint, exhausted, and constantly afraid that the gorilla may well come back.

The third way to deal with the gorilla in your house is to accept it, tame it, and make it part of your life. Figure out a way to calm your gorilla down. Teach it how to sit still until you are able to take it places with you without it making a scene. Find out how to equip your home with gorilla-friendly furnishings and appliances. Negotiate with your boss about ways to accommodate, or even make use of, your gorilla. Meet other people who live with gorillas and enjoy having something in common, and share gorilla-taming tips.

People get really upset about this and throw around accusations of “giving up” and “not even trying”. They even suggest that you enjoy having a gorilla around because of the attention it gets you (while ignoring the massive pile of steaming gorilla-turds in your bedroom every morning and night, not to mention your weekly bill for bananas). The best way to deal with these people is to smile and remind yourself that one day, they too will have a gorilla in their house.”
British things

I see your memories and I raise you:

  • scoobies/scooby bracelets
  • “Get outta my pub!”
  • Howard from Halifax
  • the Cadbury’s Gorilla playing the drums
  • FUN HOUSE 
  • watching Bargain Hunt when you’re home sick
  • the lady who put her cat in the dustbin
  • THE SHINY SHOW!
  • the fucking eyebrow advert you all tried to copy don’t lie
  • Christmas day doctor who
  • Fort Boyard/The Crystal Maze/ *insert bizzare tv gameshow show here*
  • Olympics home pride back in 2012
  • Susan Boyle
  • wanting to go on Jungle Run
  • Whetherspoon’s having posh loo’s
2

OK guys. in episode 11 The Dominator of the Universe it shows all the villains that are still live and what thy are doing currently. Hammerhead is filling out job applications. Dr Genus and Armored Gorilla are now making some form of food item that has octopus in it and then it gets fried into little patties. The we move on to Speed O’ Sound Sonic and it shows an wooden post with all sorts of throwing daggers embedded in it . If you look at the post carefully you can see Saitamas face is carved into it. But very few knifes are have actually hit the face. I mean really Sonic how can you even hope of defeating Saitama if you cant even hit an target that is standing still. That is completely unreasonable

Acquiring a disability is a bit like getting home to find there’s a gorilla in your house. You contact the approved and official channels to get rid of infestations of wild animals (in this case, the NHS) and they umm and aah and suck air in through their teeth before saying something roughly equivalent to “what you’ve got ‘ere, mate, is a gorilla, and there ain’t really a lot what we can do about them, see…” before sending you back home to the gorilla’s waiting arms.

The gorilla in your house will cause problems in every part of your life. Your spouse may decide that (s)he can’t deal with the gorilla, and leave. Your boss may get upset that you’ve brought the gorilla to work with you and it’s disrupting your colleagues, who don’t know how to deal with gorillas. You’re arriving for work wearing a suit the gorilla has slept on. Some days you don’t turn up at all because at the last minute, the gorilla has decided to barricade you into the bathroom or sit on you so you can’t get out of bed. Your friends will get cheesed off because when you see them - which isn’t often, because they don’t want to come to your house for fear of the gorilla and the gorilla won’t always let you out - your only topic of conversation is this darn gorilla and the devastation it is causing.

There are three major approaches to the gorilla in your house.

One is to ignore it and hope it goes away. This is unlikely to work. A 300-lb gorilla will sleep where he likes, and if that’s on top of you, it will have an effect on you.

Another is to try and force the gorilla out, wrestling constantly with it, spending all your time fighting it. This is often a losing battle. Some choose to give all their money to people who will come and wave crystals at the gorilla, from a safe distance of course. This also tends to be a losing battle. However, every so often, one in a hundred gorillas will get bored and wander off. The crystal-wavers and gorilla-wrestlers will claim victory, and tell the media that it’s a massive breakthrough in gorilla-control, and that the 99 other gorilla-wrestlers just aren’t doing it right due to sloppy thinking or lack of committment. The 99 other gorilla-wrestlers won’t have the time or energy to argue.

I have known people spend the best years of their life and tens of thousands of pounds trying to force their gorillas to go away. The tragedy is that even if it does wander off for a while, they won’t get their pre-gorilla lives back. They’ll be older, skint, exhausted, and constantly afraid that the gorilla may well come back.

The third way to deal with the gorilla in your house is to accept it, tame it, and make it part of your life. Figure out a way to calm your gorilla down. Teach it how to sit still until you are able to take it places with you without it making a scene. Find out how to equip your home with gorilla-friendly furnishings and appliances. Negotiate with your boss about ways to accomodate, or even make use of, your gorilla. Meet other people who live with gorillas and enjoy having something in common, and share gorilla-taming tips.

People get really upset about this and throw around accusations of “giving up” and “not even trying”. They even suggest that you enjoy having a gorilla around because of the attention it gets you (while ignoring the massive pile of steaming gorilla-turds in your bedroom every morning and night, not to mention your weekly bill for bananas). The best way to deal with these people is to smile and remind yourself that one day, they too will have a gorilla in their house.
— 

I found this on another website.  I couldn’t find an author listed but thought it was too good not to share.

Enjoy.. 

KSOTR Overwatch Mains
  • Yuna: Plays Mercy, quietly heals and boosts allies. Doesn't try and hold onto rez, just uses it whenever someone goes down.
  • Hina: Soldier 76. Cause he can run. Sure other people may be faster but he can run. Hina likes running.
  • Ano: Places down turrets with Torbjörn all the time because she forgets where they are.
  • Sachi: Zarya. She wants everyone to know she likes girls.
  • Megumi: She knows for a fact that Zarya is dating Mei so she plays Mei.
  • Seina: Someone made a joke about her being Winston and raging out but instead of getting upset she decided to accept that part of herself and now people fear the rage gorilla that wrecks house.
  • Miki: Wants to be able to do everything she can do fill every role so she plays Zenyatta. Has a bad habit of getting shot while trying to maintain orbs on everyone.
  • Sasa: Reaper all the way. Keeps trying to get the Nevermore skin.
  • Umi: Fights with Youka over Lucio, Umi says she is an actual DJ while Youka is a rock star.
  • Nena: Fill whatever gap the team needs. You think she isn't around but somehow gets PotG every time.
  • Aki: Surprisingly good at baiting people into a well placed kill room with Symmetra.
  • Youka: Wants to be a good Reinhardt and protect her allies but can't resist charging in and swinging her hammer around like The Who with their guitars.
  • Miyu: Miyu likes to assess everything before engaging so she sits back with Widowmaker and gets her headshots in. Gets distracted by Matsuri trying to distract her with Tracer.
  • Matsuri: Loves to distract Miyu with Tracer.
  • Kiri: Claims D.Va as her adorable cute daughter right away.
  • Sonou: Hangs in the back as Ana because she wants to see her students take the lead but is there to support them when they need it.

badassgirlz  asked:

hey! what do you think about Gorillas like Koko, who use sign language? i watched an inspiring documentary on it, and in my eagerness to learn more came across the darker side in some news article saying like oh she's overweight and depressed, and her trainer reads too much into the signs that aren't clear and so on. I'm confused, i want to believe that gorillas have a range of emotional intelligence and can express it and whatever (what about their paintings, eh?) thanks for ur insight ;)

Oh boy. Oh, oh boy. I’ve hung on to this ask for a while now because the history of apes and language research is a lot of shit to unravel.

It all honestly stems from a weird colonialist mindset (with racist undertones) that by gosh, we can teach these creatures to be human/civilized. The idea that great apes and other creatures like elephants and parrots have some hidden potential that is just waiting to be unlocked by the right scientist is, in my mind, nearly as awful as the mindset of European colonists who “discovered” foreign tribespeople and decided that they could be uplifted with the introduction of proper culture and manners. Not ever quite equal to the Europeans, mind you, but certainly similar enough to be charming.

Image above: The young chimpanzee Gua was one of the first documented cross-rearing experiments with great apes. Gua was returned to a zoo after her handlers’ ten-month-old son began imitating her sounds, not the other way around.

Does this seem too harsh? I’m sorry, but there are cruel parallels there we can’t ignore. To assume that there is potential inside an animal we can ‘unlock’ with the right coaxing is to assume that animals in the wild are too stupid to do it on their own. That’s the crux of it. Other species do not communicate with each other the same way that we do. Of course they are not going to be able to mimic our methods perfectly. It would be ridiculous to me if a gorilla like Koko could speak in flawless sign language, because again, gorillas do not communicate the same way we do.

I should stop and say I don’t mean this as an indictment of you or anyone else who is fascinated by great ape language research. It is fascinating- but it is also rooted in a very, very sad and flawed history, and we cannot forget that. And we have to remember that something like an animal’s emotional intelligence is not proved or disproved by their ability to do human activities like painting pictures.

Again: see the shadiness? “Unless these animals can act like me, they aren’t intelligent.” That’s a messed-up way of thinking.

Until recently, all ape language experiments started with removing the apes from their mothers at birth and rearing them like humans. Unfortunately, as stated before, apes are not human. Koko, still in contact with her handlers as an adult, is a rarity: most of these experiments terminated after three months, when the apes became too strong and unruly to handle. These apes, raised like human children, then had to struggle to socialize with their own species once returned to them.

You don’t have to consider the living conditions of Koko, in particular, to realize that there are some things which seem terribly off about it. A stable gorilla social unit in the wild, as far as female gorillas are concerned, is a group of around five or more females along with their young of both sexes and one adult male. These females are a close-knit group of mothers, sisters, aunts, and cousins that generally stay together for life (unless the group becomes too large and splits). But Koko has lived most of her life alone, with occasional male companions such as Michael or Ndume (who she currently only sees through a fence barrier). Human companions do not make up for other gorillas.

Yes, Koko is overweight. Yes, her diet, as far as I’ve read, is crap. Gorillas almost never eat meat: she eats lots. They don’t eat much salt and refined sugar in the wild: she gets lots. She also apparently receives homeopathic medications, which no legitimately scientific organization should touch with a ten-foot pole.

And as for the scientific legitimacy of The Gorilla Foundation, which houses Koko? Well, how much new ape language research have you read from them in the past ten years? The place is still running, but the only paper I’ve seen concerning Koko in recent times concerns her ability to manage her breathing when playing with wind instruments. Interesting, but not exactly breaking any interspecies barriers. And the research on Koko does very little to help us understand and protect endangered wild apes. In fact, other research suggests that making apes act in humanlike ways reduces the public’s interest in conserving their wild counterparts.

Most of the ‘research’ on Koko is composed of anecdotes, and most of those anecdotes come from Francine “Penny” Patterson, Koko’s primary caretaker and the director of the gorilla foundation. In most videos provided to the public, what Koko signs, Penny interprets to the audience. Koko uses a modified version of American sign language called “gorilla sign language” (GSL), which means that even ASL speakers may not be able to interpret what she’s signing. Right now, a tiny number of people have the ability to interpret Koko, which is not good on the scientific front. It reminds me very much of the facilitated communication scandal that occurred in the 90s, where ‘facilitators’ claimed to be the only ones who could interpret the language of autistic children.

Now, I am not saying that great apes cannot communicate some things using sign language. (Nor am I trying to say that the plight of great apes is equivalent to the autistic children abused through facilitated communication or the people oppressed by European colonizers. Though the Gorilla Foundation apparently doesn’t mind equating apes to humans with disabilities.) There is certainly evidence that great apes can learn to identify objects using symbols, such as lexigrams or signs. Indeed, many wild animals use representative sounds or gestures for specific items, such as predators or types of food. But humans use language in more abstract ways than merely identifying objects- we are able to discuss the past and present and things about people who aren’t in the room. The evidence that apes can communicate things like this through sign language or other forms of symbolic communication isn’t just limited- it’s basically nonexistent. (Notice that I’m only talking about communication here- apes may still be able to understand things like this while not being able to communicate them with others!)

Dressing apes up as humans an trying to teach them to talk the way we do was a research fad that appears to be, thank goodness, in its death throes. You can’t find much research about it in the past ten years that wasn’t published by Sue Savage-Rumbaugh, who has an equally problematic history with her captive bonobos as Penny Patterson has with Koko. This is because it’s considered barely scientifically valid by the science community is large. The question, “Can apes communicate just like people do?” is a resounding “No,” as far as science is concerned.

Most research on ape communication is now focused on the study of natural behaviors of apes, such as gestures used by wild chimpanzees. These will teach us much more about chimpanzees than any cross-rearing study ever will. We should be focusing on understanding the apes, rather than trying to get them to use human languages they are poorly equipped to use.

In closing: I haven’t even touched many of the issues with ape language studies, such as the sexual harassment scandal against Patterson and the experiments on Nim Chimpsky because this answer has gone on far too long. It is a tangled goddamn nightmare out there. I know that many people want to focus on the ‘they’re just like us!’ aspect and ignore the rampant abuse heaped on the animals in question- but if you truly love apes, you cannot. Suffice it to say: if you are looking for signs of emotional intelligence and social cognition in the great apes, please look for it in apes acting like apes, not apes acting like humans.

Further reading:

Nim Chimpsky: The Ape Who Would Be Human by Elizabeth Hess (and the related documentary, Project Nim)

What Do Talking Apes Really Tell Us? by Jane C. Hu

Thoughts on Three Famous ‘Language Apes’ by Barbara J. King

Troubled Ape Facility Reinstates Controversial Researcher by Kate Wong

Silent Partners: The Legacy of the Ape Language Experiments by Eugene Linden

youtube

“Sports Talk” new sketch from Gorilla House Films!!!

youtube

Staring Contest

3 2 1 Go

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My friends and I made a sketch comedy thing. SanchezVentura and I experience the ultimate high-five.

Enjoy my subtle, nuanced performance, won’t you?

Audio may not be safe for work. That is, if your workplace is against dumb, PG-13 sex jokes.