google real names

colorado gothic
  • the mountains in the distance will never change their size on the horizon until you are in them and they are around you
  • always bring an umbrella and sunscreen, do not trust the news, they do not trust you
  • some people own farms in the city. bring them bread when you can. never tell them your name. never go inside their house
  • you will sometimes see foxes in the early morning when walking. they will greet you. do not return the greeting, but nod slightly, and do not keep walking until you can no longer see them
  • a distant friend or relative will tell you of an encounter they’ve had with a mountain lion. never speak to them again, mountain lions do not exist.
  • learn to do bird calls if you live outside of denver. do them every time you are walking outside before 6am. this will keep you safe.
  • marijuana dispensaries are common but you will never see someone enter them from the front, and if you do, it is not a real dispensary. avoid them at all costs.
  • there will always be someone wearing shorts while it is snowing. they know things that you do not.
  • however, if they are wearing shorts in the rain, avoid them. they are not to be trusted.
  • sometimes it will rain when you cannot see many clouds. take deep breaths and stay calm. do not forget your name.
  • if you are west of denver and east of the mountains, use the city to know which direction east is. do not use the mountains to tell which direction west is. only use the city.
  • colfax does not and has never existed, never believe anyone who tries to tell you otherwise. never drive on a street calling itself colfax.
  • there’s a guy on 16th street who has an afro and dresses like a robot. you can trust him. you can not know his name.
  • never take anything from the ground when you are on lookout mountain. even if the stones are pretty, they can not belong to you.
  • the garden of the gods is a cursed area and all who enter are doomed to discover who The True Gods are
  • there is a cave near one of the parking lots at Red Rocks. if you enter it, when you leave, you will not be in the world you started in. even if it appears the same.
  • colorado is not the shape the map tells you it is. it ends in the mountains for miles before returning. if someone tells you they live in the mountains never ask them to specify. only go to their house if they invite you specifically. bring your own drinks. come alone.

anonymous asked:

Why do you not do NSFW art? Is it a personal thing or do you fear it will stain your professional reputation? I ask because I've considered expanding my art to nsfw art because we all need to pay the bills but I would'nt want to lose a legit job for it.

i guess it’s a testament to how well i cover my tracks that you cant find my nsfw art 😊
it’s not that big of a deal as you might think. the worst case scenario would be if an employer googled your real name and a bunch of niche pornography showed up. just work under a screen name, set up a separate paypal, etc. it’s not that hard to keep that work separate from work you show an employer. lots of ppl in the industry do it. and a little porn wouldn’t ruin your career if it slipped out, we’re all adults. so do what ya gotta do!

COSPLAYERS

Cosplayers That Never Cosplay Anything Racier Than A Swimsuit: drop dead gorgeous or absolutely adorable, generally nice people, excellent costumes and materials, a lot of time, attention to detail and care in their costumes. a lot of love and respect for the characters depicted. either a hobby, or maybe a side career if their professional career helps in making their costumes and/or materials. pays contractors for props and costumes in a timely manner. look and act evocative enough to make people’s imaginations run wild.

“Erotic” Cosplayers: their face looks like it’s melting. mean, nasty, passive aggressive, drama prone. shoddy cheap costumes or ones that they clearly stiffed someone with the bill for. their main line is always some weird pseudo sex work but never to the point of actual penetration. they don’t care about the costumes nor the characters. has no career prospects because if you google their real name you’ll see them in a mei swimsuit costume with they butthole out. never pay contractors for props and costumes and become notorious in the community for this. why do they think we want to see them naked again?

Sweet Child of Mine, Chapter 2

Summary

Laura’s five-year-old daughter accidentally introduces her to Carmilla at a park. The road to love is never smooth but nobody expected it to be like this……

[AO3] [Ch1]

Chapter 2: Sweets

It seems forever until the next weekend rolls around, with Betty asking incessantly if it’s Saturday yet and if they can go see Carmilla. Laura can only hope that Carmilla’s there, and peers out the front window as she pulls into her parking spot. Carmilla’s sitting on her bench, dark hair falling into her face as she stares intently at her book. Betty wriggles in her booster seat, peering out of the window.

“Mommy, she’s here!” she says.

“Yes sweetheart, she is. Okay, sit still so I can unbuckle you.” Betty manages to be quiet for the three seconds it takes Laura to remove her seatbelt, then is out of the car almost faster than Laura can see. “Betty, wait for me,” she calls, as she leans over the backseat to pick up her bag. Betty tugs on Laura’s pant leg.

“Mooommmmyyyyy,” she whines.

“Let me lock the car, okay,” Laura says, fumbling for her keys. There’s the familiar beep and click as the locks slide into place.

“Can we go now?”

“Yes,” Laura says, turning around. “You can go. Be careful!” she calls as Betty takes off across the playground towards the bench. She follows more slowly, watching her daughter bounce up to Carmilla and tap her on the knee. This is a huge change from this morning, when Betty’d had a headache and didn’t want to get out of bed. Laura’s not sure if Betty feels a whole lot better, because the instant she’d said that they might not be able to see Carmilla, Betty had told her that she could be better, and demanded that Laura let her up.

As Laura approaches, she hears Betty chattering excitedly to Carmilla about her week at school, where they’d made flowers out of tissue paper and hung them on the walls of the classroom.

“Hello,” Laura says, sitting down beside Carmilla.

Carmilla gives her a half-smile. “Hello.”

“Did you bring my cupcake?” Betty asks, interrupting them.

“Betty!” Laura’s a little embarrassed, but Carmilla only laughs.

“Yes I did, if your mother says you can have it.”

“Mommy can I please?”

“Only half of it right now.”

Carmilla rustles around in her bag and emerges with a little cardboard box. “I didn’t know what you like, so I brought vanilla,” she says, popping the top open. She watches as Laura takes the box and carefully splits the cupcake in half, handing one part to Betty.

“Don’t eat it too quick,” she says, but half of it is already gone and Betty’s mouth is covered in white frosting.

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Come with me, into mystery. Gravity falls is not what it seems...

DIPPER | MABEL

oh my god i just googled “what is shaggy’s real name?” meaning shaggy from scooby doo and instead google gave me shaggy the singer’s real name, which like, understandable, BUT, shaggy the singer’s first name is apparently Orville, and shaggy from scooby doo’s real name is Norville. isn’t that wild??