“So, one of the eternal truisms of the internet is that nearly everywhere you go, you’ll find someone posting pictures or videos of cute baby animals.
This morning, this reminded of this wonderful idea that Josh Medin came up with for a science fiction setting, one of my gamer comrades from college. It’s such a great idea that I really feel I need to swipe it and use it somewhere, making sure he gets full credit.
Basically, there is this alien race of spider-like aliens. They’re the size of the Alien Queen from ALIENS, and they are TERRIFYING to behold. Everything about them, from their smell to their multiple eyes and unfolding dripping mandibles, to their chitinous multiple legs, all of that hits the “oh shit it’s a spider OH GOD OH GOD” buttons in most human’s brains.
But here’s the thing. Not only are these aliens ferociously intelligent, with a powerful civilization that is at least on par with humanity in terms of power and advancement and culture… but they adore humans. They think we’re just the most adorable things ever! SQUEEE!
And yes, the SQUEE sound that these spider-aliens make is something that many humans will instinctively assume is a battle cry or “I HUNGER” and it makes things a bit nervewracking.
But basically, humans look like infantile spiderlings to these aliens. Their infants only have four limbs – their youth limbs haven’t diverged yet, because at young age, the legs are too brittle if they fully separate into eight.
Their infants only have two functional eyes – the other ten haven’t opened yet, that happens over the course of their adolescence.
Their infant’s exoskeleton hasn’t hardened yet, so human skin looks rather like their proto-cartilage exterior.
Our mouths haven’t grown exterior mandibles “yet”, just like their infants.
And best of all, infant spiders are born with a light down of hair to keep them warm until the exoskeleton hardens, especially over their braincore, which spider parents just love to style and braid as a way of showing their affection and to hang little bits of jewelry off when taking their kids out in public to show off.
So when these terrifying Spider-creatures first met humanity, they were overcome with adoration and the urge to stroke our hair, tittering with each other over how cute and sweet and OH MY GOD LOOK AT HER EYES THEY’RE SO SOULFUL I COULD JUST DIE.
Even years later, humanity still isn’t quite sure how to handle this. The spiders have been an invaluable ally and trading partner, that’s unquestioned. But they do tend to patronize us just a bit, assuming that we’re all still basically children, even if they intellectually know better. And of course, many humans still have to resist the urge to unleash primal screams of terror when one of them comes around just out of pure survival instinct, even if they intellectually know that the Spiders are our friends, and would NEVER EVER EVER do anything to hurt us, not our adorable little fur and cheeks WHO’S A GOOD LITTLE BOY YES YOU ARE YES YOU ARE!
There’s famous news footage of a much beloved Chief Executive from one of the nations of humanity, sitting down with a High WarCaster of the Spider planet, trying to hash out serious diplomatic negotiations, and all the elderly spider chief can think to do is offer Mr. President another plate of honey-jelly pods, and offer him tissues for his sniffles, and dote on him like a fawning mother while quivering with utter joy. It’s the foundation of one of the more famous internet-memes of that decade.“
Today, I had a news coverage where I talk about movies〜〜😍❤️ And, a Sakunoki recording😍❤️
It was an enjoyable day〜〜！
When I said everything I wanted to say about movies… “You watch more than me”〜〜😮✨ I was given admiration！😂👍 Also, from the latest movies, I watched most if not all of them, so I made them surprised😂 After all, being able to do something you like as a job is fun！ I want to be even more professional〜〜！
And one day, to become someone appearing in those movies…😊✨ I will do my best〜〜！
This time’s Sakunoki recording too, I talked too much！Aahー、It was fun😂
Actually, I make countless trial and errors, so please listen every week without missing it！
Tomorrow, I can meet everyone from HKT〜😊 I’m excited😊❤️
He probably has an inferiorty complex because no one likes google+ and he is totally insecure and sometimes, when he’s alone with Oliver he suddenly starts to cry because he just can’t hold it back anymore and Oliver is the only one who knows about his insecurities and Oliver just wraps his arms around him and comforts him and tells him that he’s loved and that he is perfect just the way he is.
Waaー。I was bathing and it already became this time！ Sorry for being this late🙇
Today, after a while, I finally saw Maru-chan😭 As days we can’t meet continued, I missed Maru-chan more and more😭💕
Haaaaa。I’m glad I saw Maru-chan……😭😭
Ah！Nako’s Gugutasu！ I saw itー！ I was shocked😭✨It made me really happy 😭✨ I hope for everyone doing their best to be rewarded😊
Lately, everything is so great〜！ I hope happiness keeps increases from now on✨
Also, thank you for always commenting on Gugutasu😊 It will be around 6 years since my first post No matter what kind of SNS I use, I will never give up on Gugutasu, so everyone, please don’t give up looking at it😂💕
With really really cute Honma Hinatan😍 Senbatsu togetherーーー！I’m so happyー！
Hey guys, this took 5-6 hours long & I worked really hard. Please credit me if you share it, thank you. ♈️ ♉️ ♊️ ♋️ ♌️ ♍️ ♎️ ♏️ ♐️ ♑️ ♒️ ♓️ Also, follow for more. That would mean a lot, almost to 4k on G+! :3333 Yas~ I also post tons more fandom schist, so why not.