Prompt: I was wondering if I could request a JimxReader fic where they go to a party and Jim gets a bit tipsy and the reader has to drag him home and he later apologizes? - @imaginenterprise
Word count: 1,790
Warnings: alcohol; possibly language (since I can’t guarantee that I kept that PG ever)
A/N: that took me much longer to write than I thought and the apology is a very, very tiny part of it so maybe that’s not what was precisely wanted? i also feel like it’s a jim kirk piece that’s a little light on the jim kirk? i hope not! i really do hope that you like it!
You can’t just walk around picking and choosing which lives to save and which to destroy. The inherent arrogance and the underlying evil of such a thing runs too deep to avoid–no matter how good your intentions might be.
I don’t know what this is. I wanted to write a short little drabble. It got longer, I got tired, I’m pretty sure it’s ridiculous. But it’s my first foray into Star Trek AOS.
Title: Talk Nerdy to Me
Pairing: Bones x Reader
Summary: Academy-era. Bones isn’t the best
flirt, but Jim is a great wingman.
The pub was overcrowded, a usual sight on an
early Friday evening. While you weren’t the biggest fan of crowds, you still
found yourself weaving your way to the bar and stealing the last available
stool, leaving Jim and Leonard to stand on either side of you.
Jim, all smiles, shouted his drink order to
bartender as you and Leonard shared a wary glance. Letting Jim order for the
three of you was not the brightest of ideas. Kirk was the king of drunken
mistakes and always did his best to drag the two of you along. Leonard’s smooth
talking was the only thing that kept the three of you out of lockup one night.
Kirk’s enthusiasm was contagious though, so you
figured what the hell and downed the shot of who knows what that slid its way
towards you. Whatever it was, it was strong as hell and you immediately started
to cough as your eyes began to water. Jim cheered, downing his own shot, while
Leonard patted you on the back stiffly.
“God, that’s good!” Jim crowed, slamming his
shot glass onto the bar. “Hit me,” he directed the bartender.
“You might want to pace yourself there,”
Leonard warned with a slight scowl, but Kirk waved him off.
“It’s a day of celebration, Bones! I will go
down in history! No one has defeated the Kobayashi Maru! Did you see their
faces?” Jim chortled. “Hell, you should have seen your face.”
“My expression was one of shock and suspicion,”
he countered, not even bothering to hide his frown now. “There’s a reason no
one has beat the Kobayashi Maru. It’s an unwinnable scenario.”
“No such thing—” Jim smirked, looking to you
You raised your hands in defense; “Don’t try to
use that smile on me, Kirk. You know the Admiral is bound to call you into his
office. You’re not taking me down with you.”
“You are terrible friends,” Jim snorted,
drinking another shot. “I did the impossible! You should be congratulating me!”
“Congratulations, Jim. You cheated on the most
important test in Starfleet Academy and now you might get expelled,” Leonard said
dryly, toasting his drink mockingly.
“I’m not going to get expelled,” Kirk rolled
his eyes and you shook your head in amusement.
“Notice how he didn’t deny cheating,” you
turned to Leonard with a laugh. His eyes sparkled with delight and you fought
hard to not get lost in them. Not that he would notice, you admitted to
“No point in it, darlin’,” you glanced down,
trying to hide your blush at his endearment. “He may be a genius, but he’s also
a damn fool.”
“You want to talk fool?” Jim smirked slyly.
“How about you, Bones? Standing over there glaring at me when there’s a pretty
girl right in front of you.”
Leonard sputtered in embarrassment, “Dammit
man, don’t change the subject!”
“Consider the subject officially changed,” Jim
announced gleefully. You didn’t know what to say, so you just glanced back and
forth between Jim’s rosy-cheeked grin and Leonard’s flustered grimace with wide
“You two have been friends for three years,” he
waggled his finger teasingly in your faces. “Do you know how many times I’ve
had to watch her bat her eyes at you while you’ve had your nose buried in a
book?” You blanched, but Jim continued on before you could shut him up, this
time turning to Leonard.
“And don’t even get me started on you, Mister
Cynicism,” he scoffed as Bones glared at him. “We share a room and you talk in
“Are you out of your corn-fed mind?” Leonard
hissed, leaning in close to Jim, teeth clenched.
“Oh relax, Bones,” Jim sighed, clapping a hand
on each of your shoulders. “She likes you, you like her. Just get together
You were mortified, no way to hide the scarlet
blush across your cheeks now. Bones, on the other hand, looked murderous.
“I’ll have you know—” Leonard attempted to
argue, but Jim wasn’t having it.
“Forget it, I’ll do it.” Turning you bodily on
the barstool so you now faced him, Jim tried his best to put on a serious face.
“Pretend I’m Bones—am I moody enough?” he wondered, giving an exaggerated
broody expression. His lips were pursed and tugged downward, and you had to
stop yourself from letting a giggle slip out at the ridiculous picture. He took
that as a good sign.
“So cadet, are you a phaser? Because you’re
absolutely stunning.” You couldn’t resist a bark of laughter, as Leonard
watched with confusion.
The doctor raised a bewildered brow. “Are you
hitting on her for me?”
“You were taking too long,” Jim countered,
quite pleased with himself as he turned to you. “Anything to add?”
Jim huffed when you shook your head no, not
saying a word. “Right, where was I? Okay…now pretend I’m the lovely lady here.”
This time he turned his attention back to Leonard and his expression become
softer, almost woefully besotted as he fluttered his lashes. Bones resisted the
urge to smile, but you could see the corner of his mouth twitching.
“Oh Doctor,” he sighed in a high pitch, more
feminine voice, “Is your name Flecainide? Because I think you just made my
heart skip a beat.”
Leonard couldn’t hold in an incredulous chuckle
as you smacked Jim lightly on the arm.
“Seriously?” you eyed the blonde in disbelief.
“Flecainide? That’s the best you
could come up with?”
“He’s a doctor,” Jim shrugged with a lopsided
grin. “He doesn’t like it dirty, he likes it nerdy.”
you muttered as Bones gave Jim a halfhearted glare, looking marginally less
“Consider the ice broken,” Kirk declared with a
bow. “Now I am going to go say hello to a rather lonely looking nurse over
there, while you two—make out, or make moon eyes at each other—whatever,” he
suggested with a playful wiggle of his brows. “I just better not see you in our
room tonight, Bones. That’s all I’m saying…” he added, offering a teasing wink
as he swaggered away.
“Well that was…” Leonard drawled.
“Something,” you finished with a giggle, glad
to see the small smile on Leonard’s face. “Looks like you got kicked out of
“If it’s choice between sleeping on the couch
in the common room or in my bed while Jim ‘entertains’
that nurse, I’ll gladly take the couch,” he admitted with a snort.
“The couch is nice and all,” you agreed
cautiously, “but my bed is much more comfortable…”
Bones eyed you with intensity, considering your
suggestion for a heart-stoppingly long moment before giving you that lazy smile
that always made you melt.
“Now a man would truly have to be a fool to say no to that.”
Prompt: “Being sarcastic af all the time and Bones loving it. Snarky flirting please.” - Anon
Word Count: 1,426
Author’s Note: I’m sorry Anon, sarcasm is actually really hard to write intentionally. It just kind of happens. Anyway, I think I milked something good out of this one, and as a bonus we get wasted!Kirk, so. Please enjoy!
Logan, whose Mrs. Hughes had one frock for day and one frock for night — “And you looked gorgeous in them both,” Carter interjected — was not, for the record, envious of the five costume changes Dockery would do in a day of shooting.
It was cold. The kind of cold that made your bones ache because of the humidity, and made your skin burn with tightness. Communications were down and as the sun was setting, it was just getting colder.
You shivered and rubbed your hands against your arms, the futile universal sign for trying to warm up. When that didn’t work, you tried cupping your hands over your mouth and blowing on them while stamping your feet.
It was fucking freezing.
“Lieutenant, have we had any luck hailing Scotty?” Jim Kirk appeared from behind a copse of trees, startling you. The tiny shot of adrenaline made you just a touch warmer.
“None whatsoever, Captain,” you replied. “Did you find shelter?”
“I found a cave, it’s not far. We’ll collect some wood on the way there, and we can start a fire with my phaser.” He pointed back the direction he’d come from. “Where’s your survival kit?”
“In the wreckage of the shuttle,” you replied, gesturing vaguely behind you. When the shuttle had mysteriously lost power, the crash-landing had caused a radiation leak that forced you to abandon the area immediately. Kirk sighed and reached into his kit, pulling out a pair of thermal ponchos. He pulled one over his head and handed the other to you.
“Let’s go, before the sun sets and we freeze,” he directed. You followed him, stopping to gather deadfall when he did. Soon, he was leading you into a small cave that was more a crack in the side of the hill than a cavern. But it was out of the wind and it felt marginally warmer. Kirk sat you down in a corner, shaking with the cold, and started on the fire. Once it was cheerfully crackling, he helped you move closer to the flames and sat beside you.
You were so cold, you couldn’t stop your teeth from chattering. The heat from the fire was only penetrating so deep, but it wasn’t getting to your core. Kirk looked you over and sighed.
“Take the poncho off,” he ordered. You looked at him like he was crazy. And then you thought he must be crazy because he was pulling his poncho off. “Take the poncho off, Lieutenant, that’s an order.”
You struggled to comply and handed it to him when it was finally free of your head. Kirk struggled with the two crinkly sheets of thermal plastic for a few minutes, but eventually managed whatever it was he was trying to accomplish. He fished around in his survival kit for something else and before you realized what was going on, he’d rigged up a small thermal sheet as a heat reflector on the side of the cave leading outside, blocking the cold just enough that air exchange could still happen, but immediately bringing the temperature up.
You watched in astonishment as he started to strip out of his clothes, and laid them out near the fire, right down to his bare feet. You forced yourself to look away when he started to shuck his underwear.
“Uh, Captain, are you delirious?” You gasped, staring intently at the fire.
“Up you get, Y/N, strip down,” he ordered, standing stark naked in front of you.
“Are you out of your mind?” You exploded in surprise. He laughed.
“You sound like Bones,” he commented. “Now strip down, or I’ll strip you myself. Your clothes are damp and are insulating you against the warmth. Strip down. I was an eagle scout, I know what I’m doing.”
Hesitantly, and without breaking eye contact with him the whole time, you pulled your clothing off, handing each item to him to lay out with his clothes. You stopped when you got to your bra and panties, faltering.
“All of them, Y/N.” He held his hand out. You cringed and pulled off the rest of your things, handing them to him. “Climb into the bag.”
“The bag?” You repeated.
“The ponchos turn into a sleeping bag. Climb in,” he explained, gesturing at the heap of crinkly fabric on the dark side of the cave. You found the opening and crawled into it, managing not to yelp in surprise when he joined you moments later. You didn’t manage to muffle your shriek of astonishment when he pulled you into his arms.
“Jim!” You exclaimed, trying to pull out of his grip.
“This is not a romantic excursion, Y/N, I’m well aware of that. But if I can’t get your temperature up soon, you’ll die. So calm down and let me be the big spoon.” He was still using his command voice, but there was a softer edge to it, like he understood how uncomfortable and awkward the situation was. “Try to get some rest.”
You wakened in the morning, at first aware of a cold patch on your shoulder, and then, as you came awake, aware that the spot on your shoulder felt cold because of how warm the rest of you was. And how warm whoever you were sprawled across was. You groaned and snuggled in a little closer before drifting back to sleep.
The second time you wakened, it was to the disgusted scoff of Leonard McCoy. “Good god, Jim, you could have froze to death and you still had time to romance the poor lieutenant?”
You shot to a sitting position, holding the thermal bag against your chest, and stared up at Doctor McCoy before looking back at Captain Kirk. Jim looked smug. McCoy looked exasperated.
“Nothing happened,” you explained, feeling your cheeks flush.
“She was hypothermic, Bones,” Jim offered, climbing out of the thermal bag and walking over to his clothes. He shivered as he pulled them on, and then poked the fire back to life. “Maybe wait a few minutes until the cave warms up again before you dress.”
“Scotty can you beam us from where I am right now?” McCoy countered.
“I’ve got a signal for three of you?” Scotty’s reply warbled through the comm. Jim leaned over and grabbed your clothes as McCoy confirmed your location, and you found yourself back aboard the Enterprise without your clothes on, wrapped in nothing but a thermal bag while Jim held your clothes.
Supernatural is on hiatus… again. Here’s some reading material that will get you through it.
1. The Dresden Files by Jim Butcher
It’s sort of like what would happen if Dean embraced magic. Harry Dresden is Chicago’s only wizard-for-hire (he put an ad in the phone book and everything, bless him). Despite being a wizard, he has a tendency to solve his problems with sheer power (less of a Hermione, more of a Simon Snow, if you will). While he does work with the things that go bump in the night often enough, he also does his share of hunting. Storm Front is the first book in the series. Give it a go.
2. Night Owls by Lauren M. Roy
One of our main characters is a hunter while the other is a vamp, and plenty of monsters are part of the team on this one - but you’ll find your share of wicked beasties in need of slaying as well. Also, there’s a pair of hunter siblings in this book that could give Sam and
Dean a run for their money as far as family drama and devotion to each
other go, and did we mention that one of the main characters runs an all-night bookstore? Icing on the cake.
3. Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett
There’s a demon named Crowley and he’s teamed up with a conservatively-dressed angel to prevent the higher powers of Heaven and Hell from unleashing the apocalypse. I really shouldn’t have to say any more.
4. American Gods by Neil Gaiman
Is it cheating to have two Neil Gaimans on this list? No? Good. Because American Gods is the road-trip book *shoves On the Road into a cupboard* THE ROAD TRIP BOOK… for fans of paranormal fiction (though, you might give Cormac McCarthy’s The Road a look, too). If the frequently eerie glimpses of small-town Americana are part of what you like about Supernatural, you’ll have a good time with American Gods.