good at running away from my feelings

4

07/24/17

Happy Monday!! Today was a decent start to the week, I made myself a smoothie for breakfast and started a new book, followed by a 5 km run in my neighborhood. The run was decent, I began with piriformis pain, but it semi-went away by the end of the run. Felt a bit gassy from the smoothie but otherwise I was okay. And I had negative splits, albeit at a slow pace, but it still counts! Afterwards I went to South Block and got my favorite PB&J acai smoothie because I am obsessed, and they even gave me some extra smoothie in a little cup! Needless to say, 2 smoothies in one day made for one happy lil tumtum🤰

In the evening I went to the 6 pm hot yoga class. Started out strong and feeling good, but by the time we got to standing separate head to knee pose, I was beginning to feel a bit nauseous and dizzy, so I had to back off and sit down. I missed tree pose too. For the the floor poses I was okay, still couldn’t put in 100% during the spine-strengthening series, but I didn’t stop. I picked a spot in the front row, and for the past few classes I’ve been choosing different spots in different rows, not sure if that is contributing to how lousy I’ve been feeling. Also, I’ve gone in the evening yesterday and today, and tomorrow’s class in the evening as well. If I don’t feel good during tomorrow’s class either, I’m going back to morning classes, because I think I feel much better when I do AM exercise.

Went out on a dinner date with my mom, and we had the best chocolate cake for dessert, so it warranted a photo.

a hundred random starters 

below are starters based on/inspired by various sources. change the genders as you see fit ;)

  • ❝ why do you keep lying to me? ❞
  • ❝ have you ever considered the idea that maybe, this world doesn’t revolve around you & your problems? ❞
  • ❝ love is love is love is love. ❞
  • ❝ marriage is an absurd arrangement. one is sold as a fifteen-year-old child and makes a vow one does not understand and then regrets for thirty years or more, and which one can never undo again. ❞
  • ❝ why are you crying this time? ❞
  • ❝ you will never escape. ❞
  • ❝ this isn’t what I wanted! ❞
  • ❝ everything has its consequences. ❞
  • ❝ this face bears the mission of heaven. ❞
  • ❝ no, you shall dismantle the house of lies, but build the temple of the divine. ❞
  • ❝ one copper coin for a bowl of noodles! ❞
  • ❝ that one has the heart of a lion. ❞
  • ❝ I needed to be summoned. ❞
  • ❝ there’s no reason for this hostility! I come in peace. ❞
  • ❝ they died screaming. ❞
  • ❝ why fight anymore? what’s the point of fighting against destiny? ❞
  • ❝ how long have you known? ❞
  • ❝ I can only speak for myself. ❞
  • ❝ the law can be changed. ❞
  • ❝ are you sure you’re not pregnant? ❞
  • ❝ your child is adorable! ❞
  • ❝ you gave him a riddle for his birthday? ❞
  • ❝ you have no fucking right to treat me this way. ❞
  • ❝ your ambition blinds you. ❞
  • ❝ he adores you. ❞
  • ❝ I feel like I should be shocked that you two had sex there, but I’m not anymore. ❞
  • ❝ she’s going to kill you. ❞
  • ❝ have you ever tried the cakes? they’re actually quite delicious. ❞
  • ❝ you’ll need to be punished. ❞
  • ❝ you should learn to lie better. ❞
  • ❝ sometimes I wonder if you’re real. ❞
  • ❝ I will take back what is mine & kill anyone who stands in my way. ❞
  • ❝ then kill me. ❞
  • ❝ there’s no such thing as love. there is only lust. ❞
  • ❝ you’re selfish. you never think about anyone but yourself. ❞
  • ❝ i’m sorry, but they’re gone. ❞
  • ❝ death is just another adventure. ❞
  • ❝ stop! ❞
  • ❝ let them watch. ❞
  • ❝ you have no shame, do you? ❞
  • ❝ I can’t believe we’re talking about this right now. ❞
  • ❝ I need advice. sex advice. ❞
  • ❝ alright, tell me the truth, is he good in bed? ❞
  • ❝ she is the best thing in my life. ❞
  • ❝ you love him? ❞
  • ❝ do you love me at all? ❞
  • ❝ do you believe in soul mates? ❞
  • ❝ please, you have to believe me. I didn’t kill anyone! ❞
  • ❝ history is written by the victorious. ❞
  • ❝ at least she has a heart! you have none. ❞
  • ❝ isn’t it more important that they told you? ❞
  • ❝ the king is displeased. ❞
  • ❝ long live your majesty! ❞
  • ❝ can you stop talking for just one moment & listen to me? ❞
  • ❝ no matter how hard I try, they just won’t stay dead. ❞
  • ❝ he’s a gold digger. he’ll screw anyone & marry them as long as they have money. ❞
  • ❝ o! how sweet love must be! ❞
  • ❝ do you really think that? ❞
  • ❝ quick, you need to hide before they see you! ❞
  • ❝ you taught me to never trust anyone. ❞
  • ❝ this is extreme, even for you. ❞
  • ❝ you guys were pretty loud last night. I guess it was good? ❞
  • ❝ that wasn’t an apology & you know it. ❞
  • ❝ are you a virgin? ❞
  • ❝ I’m married. ❞
  • ❝ best thing I ever did was marrying you. ❞
  • ❝ red roses won’t erase the fact that you broke my heart. ❞
  • ❝ stop taking all the ice cream! ❞
  • ❝ has anyone told you that you’re sort of a little bitch? ❞
  • ❝ it’s deep dish pizza. ❞
  • ❝ do you want to fight for your land back or not? ❞
  • ❝ I never realized how much of a coward you are. ❞
  • ❝ there’s nothing worse than someone who isn’t willing to try new things. ❞
  • ❝ haven’t you ever wanted to escape? to leave this place & explore the world? ❞
  • ❝ i think you’ve had enough to drink. ❞
  • ❝ your ancestors would be ashamed if they saw you. ❞
  • ❝ one of the dolls is missing! ❞
  • ❝ are we going to die here? ❞
  • ❝ well looks like we’ve found ourselves in a bit of a dilemma. ❞
  • ❝ I am no longer a child! ❞
  • ❝ the baby won’t stop crying! i don’t know what to do anymore! ❞
  • ❝ what if something happens to them? ❞
  • ❝ once upon a time, I gave a damn about what people thought about me. ❞
  • ❝ if he can get away with this, then so can i! ❞
  • ❝ the dark shall come & take everything you love from you. ❞
  • ❝ it’s the same story over & over again. you’d think people would know better by now. ❞
  • ❝ there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you. ❞
  • ❝ you are what is wrong with this world. ❞
  • ❝ shattered dreams can drive anyone mad. ❞
  • ❝ I am a phoenix. burn me & I shall return, rising from the ashes. ❞
  • ❝ this is my home. ❞
  • ❝ home is where the heart is, where you feel safe & warm & loved. ❞
  • ❝ running away has never solved a damn thing! ❞
  • ❝ fuck me. ❞
  • ❝ oh the things I’d do to you if we were alone. ❞
  • ❝ stop, he’s not here, remember? he’s gone & he can’t hurt you anymore. ❞
  • ❝ your husband/wife – is he/she good to you? ❞
  • ❝ stop & think a moment, you have to stay & rest. there’s a child who needs you now, you can’t just run & be a fucking idiot. ❞
  • ❝ once, I drank a whole bottle by myself. ❞
  • ❝ what do I want? I want to kiss you a thousand times before undressing you & kissing every bit of your flesh a thousand more times. ❞
What About Lars?

Having just binge-watched the latest Stevenbomb, I see a lot of people on my dash freaking out about how Steven’s in the clutches of Gems who know he’s got Rose Quartz’s gem and are plotting to do who-knows-what to him, and how all his friends back on Earth are freaking out about his sacrifice and blah blah blah.

Not gonna lie, I’m worried about what kind of shit poor Steven is going through, but I’m more worried about Lars Barriga.

You know, the same Lars who, in “Island Adventure”, admits in a moment of weakness to feeling astoundingly isolated from others?

The Lars who, according to “The New Lars”, is suffering academically, probably because of a host of un-diagnosed mental issues?

The Lars who admits, in “Tiger Philanthropist”, he doesn’t know what would make him happy?

The Lars who, in “The Good Lars”, is desperate for friends but also unable to reach out to anybody for fear of rejection?

The Lars who probably thinks Sadie and everyone else hates him and thinks he’s a coward because he ran away from Topaz in “I Am My Mom”, when running from a hulking space alien who is giving Connie and Steven a hard time would actually be a perfectly understandable reaction?

And the Lars who would never admit to any of this and instead hides it behind being a sarcastic jerk who hates everybody, and is currently stuck on Aquamarine’s ship with Steven?

I’m honestly terrified for the guy.

Come Back to Me (Part One)

Fandom: Marvel
Ship: Peter Parker x Reader
Requested: No, but taken from this prompt list: “Just… come back alive, okay?”
Genre: Low-key angst??
Warnings: Spiderman Homecoming spoilers
Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six Part Seven Part Eight Part Nine Part Ten

Originally posted by j-murphy

Your best friend had raved on and on about asking his crush to the dance, and when he finally did it, you were the first he told. You pretended to be excited for him, and in a small way, you genuinely were. But when you thought of Liz slow-dancing with Peter instead of you, and him kissing her at the end of the night and not you, the excitement for him was largely overshadowed by sadness, because it would never be you. He would never have feelings for you.

So when you saw Liz walk into the Homecoming dance without Peter on her arm, your eyebrows furrowed. She walked around, greeting people everywhere around her, when she made her way to your group with Ned and Michelle. 

“Hey guys!” She said excitedly and smiled, and you forced a smile back. She was a nice girl; you couldn’t deny that. She was good for Peter.

“Hey,” you said back. “Where’s Peter? I thought he’d be with you,” you tried to keep your voice casual, but Michelle caught your eye and smirked. She knew your secret. 

“Oh, he’s in the car with my dad. He should be here soon,” she smiled again, dazzling one, before excusing herself to greet more partygoers. You turned around to face your two friends, fake smile still on your face.

“You okay?” Ned asked, a sympathetic expression on his face that you didn’t see often. He knew your secret too.

(It wasn’t much of a secret to anyone but Peter.)

“I’m okay,” you gave a real smile this time, and his eyes shifted to somewhere behind you. You stiffened, knowing your best friend was here. You turned around, seeing a panicked look on his face, but you knew that you were the only one who could tell his expression. You’d known each other for years; you knew all of his in-and-outs.

He went up to Liz and tapped her on the shoulder, and as he spoke to her, you saw his expression become guilty. You couldn’t see Liz’s because her back was turned to you, but you were sure it wasn’t pleasant. You saw him mouth ‘I’m sorry’ before sprinting through the gym doors and into the hallways of the school. 

Before you knew what you were doing, you were running after him. You abandoned your shoes after crashing through the gym doors and followed him barefoot. “Peter!” You yelled and turned another corner, but he continued to sprint farther ahead of you. After yelling his name again and turning a few more corners he stopped in front of a set of lockers and turned around to look at you.

“(Y/N), go back to the dance,” he said, the panic now even more evident on his face.

“No,” you said stubbornly. “What do you think you’re doing? You’ve been looking forward to this for so long!” 

He simply shook his head before grabbing you by the shoulders and turning you around. “You need to go. Now.”

“No!” You pushed his hands away from you. He looked at you desperately. “What is going on with you?”

He turned away again and mumbled under his breath, pacing back and forth. 

“Peter,” you said his name again, softer this time, and grabbed his hand to stop his pacing. “I’m your best friend. You can tell me anything,” you say, ignoring the feeling erupting in your chest from him squeezing your hand. 

“I know, I know,” he whispered and stayed silent for a few moments, staring down at your connected hands, before sighing, pulling away from you, and turning towards the lockers again. He bent down and pulled the bottom of the lockers, and you gasped in shock when the wall of lockers lifted up to reveal a small crevice filled with multiple things. 

Peter pulled out a ball of red and blue fabric and unrolled it, then turned around to show you it. You stared at try fabric in his hands, seeing the spider on the front and the mask with goggles falling to the side. You stared at it, and stared at it, and stared at it, before it finally clicked. You had seen this suit on the news multiple times before, clad on a mystery man you had always found so brave. 

You looked up at Peter and noticed his nervous expression matching yours. “Why do you have Spiderman’s suit, Pete?” You whispered, and you knew why he had it, you knew, but you couldn’t bring yourself to comprehend it. 

“You know why, (Y/N),” he sighed and looked down at the wrinkled fabric in his hands. 

“I need to hear you say it,” your voice was still quiet, and you looked down at the suit again. 

“I’m Spiderman,” Peter finally said, and your resolve crumbled. Tears flooded your eyes and your vision became blurry, and a few tears fell down your cheeks.  You weren’t sure why you were crying. You didn’t know if it was the betrayal of him not telling you, or the fear of him getting hurt, or something else entirely. But the tears continued to fall. 

“(Y/N),” he sighed again, and pulled you into a hug. “It’s okay. Why are you crying?”

“I don’t know,” you sobbed and laughed and cried, and Peter hugged you and rubbed your back until you could compose yourself. You pulled back from him after a few minutes and wiped your face with your hands, sure you looked like a mess. “But why are you leaving now?”

He sighed for what seemed like the millionth time in the last few minutes. “You know the guy that I’ve been fighting? All the news channels have been talking about it. Or, who Spiderman has been fighting.”

You nodded. “That bird dude?” Peter laughed, a real smile on his face that made you smile too.

“Yeah, yeah, the bird dude.” He chuckled and looked down at his feet before beginning to back away. “I gotta go. He’s gonna steal from Mr. Stark’s plane, and I need to stop him.”

“But why now,” you stressed, taking steps closer to him. “It’s our Homecoming.”

“He’s Liz’s dad,” he said, not actually answering the question, and you gasped.

“Liz’s dad?” Peter nodded. “Does she know?” He shook his head, backing away again.

“I really have to go, (Y/N),” he said, and went to turn around. 

“Wait!” You grabbed his hand again, and he looked at you expectantly. “I, um,” you wanted to tell him, you needed to tell him before it was too late. But you didn’t want to burden him before he went to risk his life. So instead of telling him what you desperately wanted to, you pulled him into a hug. 

He breathed deeply, resting his chin on top of your head as you listened to his heartbeat under your ear. You pulled back the slightest bit to look him in the eyes. “Just… come back alive, okay?” 

He smiled lightly and moved his hands from your back to your hands. “I always do.” He squeezed them once and let go, grabbing the suit from where he dropped it on the floor and running away from you. You sniffed loudly as he turned a corner, disappearing from your vision, and the sound echoed through the empty hallways. 

You began to walk back to the dance, wiping at your face again and collecting your discarded shoes to make yourself presentable. And as you made your way through the school by yourself, you thought, Good luck, Spiderman.

******************
This is my first Peter piece that I’ve written in a while, so I hope everyone liked it! Feedback is always welcome! Requests for Tom Holland and Peter Parker imagines are open, so feel free to send one in! 

~e

Loneliness

Loneliness is one of the key themes in Moomin books. Tove Jansson was very familiar with this experience. Her father had been emotionally damaged by the civil war when Tove was very young and because of this, she spent her entire childhood longing for his affection. In her adulthood Tove experienced another war and had to wait for her brother, lover and friends who were away fighting. All while her friends and family were also mourning and emotionally distant. After the war ended, Tove entered another relationship full of longing and waiting with Atos Wirtanen. Endless waiting only seemed to end when she met Tuulikki Pietilä, who was finally there when Tove needed her most.

Constant waiting is a lonely experience. But Tove was also aware of another kind of loneliness. This kind of loneliness is the kind we seek ourselves. Tove was a very private person even when she became famous and also a dedicated artist who needed peace to work. She spent years trying to find a place where she could isolate herself to work and enjoy her own company.

Loneliness appears as duality in Moomin books. The bad kind of loneliness is represented with various Fillyjonks and sometimes Moomintroll himself, especially when he longs for Snufkin. Fillyjonks are anxious and depressed people who often suffer from sudden feelings of doom. Their unstable minds and efforts to keep up respectable life often end up isolating them in large houses on the beach because their grandmother had supposedly lived there as a child or in neatly decorated parlors with only their own thoughts for company. Fillyjonks long to escape this loneliness. They will reach out for people but they often fail. It seems it’s impossible to be both polite and proper and speak up about your depression at the same time.

Moominvalley in November is a book where loneliness is the main theme. So it is no wonder that a Fillyjonk is among the main characters. This Fillyjonk is tired of being anxious and alone, so she comes to visit Moomin family in hopes of getting caught up in their spontaneous life. When Moomin family appears to be away, she tries to be spontaneous like Moominmamma herself and make people around her feel at home. She fails miserably, because a timid and orderly Fillyjonk cannot be Moominmamma. Her efforts isolate her further until she lets go and starts to be herself but with a happier attitude towards herself. In the end she manages to put together a work party and heads back home with more enthusiasm. She was able to overcome her loneliness when she accepted her limitations and embraced them and others.

Another lonely Fillyjonk appears in Tales from Moominvalley; Fillyjonk Who Believed in Disasters. This Fillyjonk ends up overcoming her loneliness without other people like the Fillyjonk mentioned above. Instead, she encounters the disaster she was afraid of and turns her loneliness from bad kind to the good kind. This good kind of loneliness means that you can be by yourself and it’s not scary or unpleasant. Snufkin basically lives for this kind of loneliness. He not only enjoys being by himself, he yearns for it and becomes anxious if he does not get to be alone. In a way, his good loneliness is the opposite from Fillyjonk’s bad loneliness. This good kind of loneliness nurtures and gives us strength to be social again. Though eventually even Snufkin realizes that maybe he did not really need to be so much alone, when he was always surrounder by people who understood him.

There is no way to talk about loneliness and healing without talking about the very personification of loneliness; The Groke. The Groke is so cold that everything she touches turns to ice. This isolates her from other people completely. So completely, that they would rather not even mention her name. Whenever she approached their light, they will turn it off and run away. She is almost defiant in her loneliness. “I’m the only Groke. There is no one like me and I will never warm up” she declares in Moominpappa and the Sea. She is bad loneliness given form. But eventually a single act of kindness, Moomintroll coming to see her on the beach, frees the Groke. Moomintroll’s company and caring drive away her loneliness and turn out to be the key to her freedom; The Groke becomes warm. Moomin books always show us characters either freeing themselves from bad loneliness or finding out that limitless amount of good loneliness is not actually a key to happiness.

The truest example of independent and good loneliness is actually Little My. She is capable of finding just the right balance between loneliness and sociality. She is with others when she feels like it and despite being sharp and brutally honest, she is willing to support and nurture them whenever they need it. But she is also capable of running away whenever she feels like it. Little My is free of sentimentality and will not miss people and company. She can enjoy both loneliness and company to equal measure, without ever getting bored or sad.

Lies and Family Ties

Dean X Reader; Mary tells Dean that the reader cheated on him to stop him finding out about her (Mary) stealing from Ramiel.

Originally posted by soluscheese

Knocking on the door of the bunker, you shift on your heels outside of the place you used to call home. Palms sweaty, heart racing and you’re sure that you can smell the nervousness radiating from you.

The door opens, your now ex-boyfriend looking anything but jolly to see you on his doorstep. “Sorry, I already gave all my change to the homeless guy down the street.”

“I’m just here to get the rest of my stuff, then you’ll be clear of me for good.” Standing up straight, arms crossed against your chest, you hold your head up high, refusing to feel belittled by the man who tossed you away so easily.

He runs his tongue across his bottom lip arrogantly, a sarcastic smile on his face as he pulls open the door, inviting you inside begrudgingly. “Make it quick. Don’t take anything you didn’t pay for.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” you spit, striding past him angrily, the ache in your soul becoming even more prominent from being this close to Dean, yet knowing he’s no longer yours.

You pass Sam and Castiel in the kitchen, ignoring their judgemental gazes as you head to Dean’s room, to a bed that used to hold two bodies, not one.

Pushing all the memories within these walls away, you grab your suitcase from under the bed, flipping back the lid and throwing your belongings inside. You wanted to be out of this place as swiftly as you could be, your presence clearly unwanted.

“I’m surprised you had the nerve to show up here.” You look back over your shoulder, Mary leaning smugly against the door frame, your attention moving back to your suitcase. She was the reason you were packing in the first place, the lies she told Dean being the very statements to sever the ribbons of your relationship.

“Yeah? I’m surprised you’ve got the nerve to still be here.” you hiss, a bubble of laughter leaving her lips as she pushes you closer and closer to the edge, anger bubbling inside you. “Aren’t you afraid your web of lies will unravel?”

“Don’t be silly, sweetheart, my webs are perfectly crafted. My son will always believe his dear mommy over some worthless bitch.” Now it’s your turn to laugh, not a slither of humour in your tone. You skim your fingers over the white frame on the beside, the besotted couple grinning at the camera.

If someone had told you then, that just months down the line Mary would be alive and kicking, and she would be the very thing to rip your lover from your arms, you would’ve laughed in their face.

“You know what,” you spin around, your glare harsh enough to wound as you stare at the poisonous bitch in front of you. “I hope your boys never find out who you really are. It’d break them to know their mother almost killed their best friend.”

“Not only are you working for the British, but you disturbed the Prince of Hell, stole from him and then stood in silence as Castiel’s life drained from his eyes.”

Her expression turns colder as you taunt her, her lip quivering in anger, not being able to take the truth you’re dealing out. She makes her way towards you, fists clenching, as you speak aloud all the damage that she’s done. “Shut your mouth.”

You shake your head, standing up against her, refusing to cower under her wrath. “If you were my mom, I’d be wishing you’d have stayed on the ceiling.”

Smack! Your head sharply twists to the side as her hand makes contact with your cheek, smugness running through your veins with the knowledge that your words have hit home. “If you ever tell anybody about me stealing from Ramiel, I’ll cut your heart out.”

“She doesn’t need to tell me anything.” Mary jumps at the sound of the voice, your fingers rubbing your cheek, trying to soothe the sting. Dean enters the room, coming to stand by your side, his mother lost for words.

“Sweetheart, let me explain…” She trails off, the level of vexation in Dean’s eyes enough to shut her up. Her eyes move to you as you watch the scene unfold. “You little bitch-”

Dean pushes her back as she lunges for you, his broad figure standing protectively in front of your own, your heart clenching, hoping that maybe there is something left to salvage.

“I want you out of here, now. Don’t bother coming back.” Dean warns, the ice chill in his voice something you’d been faced with a few minutes before. Mary weighs up her options, before backing out of the room resentfully, a vengeful twinkle in her eyes.

Once she’s gone, you turn back to the task at hand, shoving your final few things into your suitcase, ignoring Dean’s burning stare on your back. You move around in silence, him not being brave enough to break it, and you wanting to hear an apology before anything else.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” You freeze at the question, Dean’s voice timid as it should be. Throwing the shirt in your grasp onto the bed, you turn to face the older brother, not being able to believe his arrogance.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I don’t remember you giving me a chance to say anything when you believed your mom’s bullshit lies over me.” He looks down at the floor as you scold him, your eyes beginning to glaze over with due to frustration.

“I’m sorry-” you cut him off with a scoff, his emerald eyes as glassy as your own as he lifts them upwards to meet you. You want nothing more than to wrap your arms around him, tell him that everything is forgiven and you can go back to how it used to be.

“You weren’t sorry when you kicked me out in the pouring rain and called me a dirty whore.” The dam breaks, you cursing yourself as you turn your back on Dean, your fingers roughly swiping away the fallen tears.

You zip up your suitcase, thankful you’ll be alone in a few minutes and able to sob to your hearts content without prying eyes. “What are you doing? Don’t go.”

“What does it look like I’m doing, Dean?” you sniffle, grasping the handle of the case and holding the heavy object to your side. “I want you to be happy, and if that means me leaving, then so be it.”

You shove past the older Winchester, your chin quivering as you somehow hold in your cries. You let out a shaky breath as a hand grabs your arm, Dean’s warm touch stopping you in your tracks.

“Stay. All I want is for you to stay.” he pleads, his throat thick with emotion. You turn your head, his glassy eyes meeting your own, a desperate look on his face.

After what feels like hours of silence, you make your decision. “Five minutes. Let’s see how well you do.”

A/N - Thanks for all the support on my last Dean imagine, it was incredibleeeeeeee!!! Feel free to request :) now, gif before the imagine, or after??? Let me know! X

random bios➳

Like the post and/or give credit to nddobrev on twitter.
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inglês/english 
  1. talents: sleeping 

  2. i didn’t choose the boob life, the boob life chose me.

  3. this semester isn’t done but i sure am 

  4. never tell a fangirl to calm down. it won’t work 

  5. i dont know whats emptier, my bank account or my love life 

  6. if you eat enough pizza it tastes like love 

  7. im 900% ready for summer vacation 

  8. please don’t waste good pizza on bad people 

  9. i just want to sleep forever because dealing with people is annoying as hell 

  10. 2010 me would literally be terrified of 2015 me and I love it 

  11. why be moody when u can shake dat booty am i right ladies 

  12. quick tip: fuck off 

  13. i wish i had dora’s parents they let that bitch go everywhere 

  14. never trust anyone who can bite an ice cream without flinching that shit’s not natural 

  15. i wish I had a pair of skinny genes 

  16. still not exactly sure what studying is 

  17. when I die, I want my grave to have free wifi so people will come visit more often 

  18. “don’t be sad” ok im better now thank u 

  19. my parents don’t realize that i am perfectly happy avoiding humanity 

  20. why are u such a little bitch 

  21. why is every girl my age 1000% prettier than me 

  22. love me back 

  23. everyone is stupid except me

  24. stu(dying) 

  25. if im weird around u that means im comfortable around u 

  26. ur a lil bitch 

  27. im always hungry 

  28. dont be a dick 

  29. i want to sleep for like 30 hours 

  30. i have too many shows to watch maybe i should drop out of school 

  31. i got 99 problems but I’m gonna take a nap and ignore them all 

  32. I’m so cute why am I not dating anyone 

  33. baby girl please don’t trust these fuckboys 

  34. wear black and be gold.

  35. you can tell a lot by listening to a girl’s favorite song 

  36. who needs april’s fools when ur life is a joke 

  37. sorry mom, i only have a virtual life

  38. sarcasm is my only defense 

  39. I think I might actually be dead

  40. i dont argue, i explain why im right 

  41. 50 shades of tired 

  42. just imagine how great life would be if pizza made u skinny 

  43. i say idk a lot but trust me i be knowing

  44. can u lose weight by running away from ur feelings 

  45. dropping out of school to become a princess

  46. apparently, when you treat people the same way they treat you they get offended 

  47. me and my mom gossip about u 

  48. 420% good vibes
português/portuguese
  1. miga não força

  2. sou meio vagabunda mas sou uma boa pessoa 

  3. prefiro morrer do que perder a vida

  4. meça suas intimidades parça

  5. sua mãe pode até te amar mas eu não

  6. miga deixa jesus fazer a obra na tua vida

  7. o twitter pergunta o que ta acontecendo eu começo chora 

  8. isso fofa come mais chocolate continua comendo vai explode logo

  9. seu cu agr é meu

  10. quero voltar pro útero da minha mãe

  11. (✿◠‿◠) minha cara de quem se importa

  12. olha só onde estou parece q o jogo mudou n é msm

  13. vc está louca querida 

  14. vai com calma viado a senhora tem um cu só

  15. olhando pro nada pensando deus me mata 

  16. toma aqui as vírgulas que eu não faço questão de usar ,,,,,,,, 

  17. vc já caga pelo cu não precisa cagar pela boca

  18. miga seje menas otaria 

  19. vc que me seguiu fofa agr aguenta

  20. meu sonho eh ser uma diva pop 

  21. vc atingiu 100% do seu limite diário de ser otaria

  22. sєjє мєησs ρυтα 

  23. a solidão me fez fã de series 

  24. 420% paz e amor

  25. lembre-se que: não sou obrigada a te seguir de volta

  26. bebendo as lagrimas das inimigas 

(◕‿◕✿) (✿◠‿◠)  *∘✧* ღ ♥ ♡ ❤ ❥ △ ∞ ☆ ★ ✖ 。®™✤ ❝❞✥ ✦ ✧ ✩ ✫ ✬ ✭ ✮ ✯ ✰ ✱ ✲ ✳ ❃ ❂ ❁ ❀ ✿ ✾ ✽ ✼ ✻ ✺ ✹ ✸ ✷ ₪ ❃ ❂ ❁ ❀ ✿ ✾ ✽ ✼ ✻ ✺ ✹ ✸ ✷ ☢ ✌ ♔ ∆ ∇ ☾ ☽ ♡  ☼  ☁ ▲ ▼ (◡‿◡✿)  ☩ ☨ ☦ ✞ ✛ ✜ ✝  ✄ † ✞ ✝ ⇦ ⇧ ⇨ ⇩ ← ↑ → ↓ ➳  ➴ ➵ ➶ ➷ ➸ ➹ ☯ ♠ Ω ♤ ♣ ♧ ♥ ♡ ♦ ♢ ➀ ➁ ➂ ➃ ➄ ➅ ➆ ➇ ➈ ➉ ➊ ➋ ➌ ➍ ➎ ➏ ➐ ➑ ➒ ➓ ⊱✿◕‿◕✿⊰ ◑△◐ ◑▽◐ ☂ 《》 ▶◀ ℃ ℉

Drive

Halsey song lyric imagine

wordcount: 2.1k

Summary:  Y/N and Jughead take a long drive out of Riverdale for a road trip and discover their hidden feelings for each other 

Warnings: swearing, slight smut, drinking

‘Swerving on the 405, I can never keep my eyes off this’

We’d been driving for hours, we didn’t even know where we were going anymore, or what were running from. The sudden impulsive decision to get out of town and take a road trip was decided by Jughead. He had been distressed at school lately and said he had a lot of stuff going on in his head, and he needed to get away. 

Me being the good friend I am, and caring a great deal for him, didn’t want him to be alone so I decided to make the offer on taking him away for a while. 

Keep reading

sex dice – first roll | jjk

jeon jungkook | bts | 1.8k words | smuttish af 

a/n : so… I wanted to write smut again but have now idea what to write then I got the random idea to use online sex dice to give me a random smut prompt. this smut is the result of the first dice roll. 


lick - chest

“Uugh,” Jungkook groans and arches his back into the mattress, as your tongue slides over his hardened nipple and zaps pleasure through his body. You know how sensitive his nipples are, they would tighten at the lightest touch, like when they rub against the fabric of his shirts or when a cold breeze grazes them. 

They are a tease when they protruded through his clothing, making dirty thoughts run through your mind that fill you with ideas what you could do with them. 

You love to toy with the velvet flesh between your fingertips, rub them and pinch them until his face distorted in bliss and pain and a throaty moan escapes Jungkook’s raw bitten lips, 

You love to circle your tongue around them, feel their softness under your tastebuds before finally enclosing your lips around them and suck purple and blue into them while feeling Jungkook’s firm grip in your hair pulling at your roots from the oversensitivity. 

“Fuck, Y/N, d–don’t tease,” he stutters as you, tonight, intentionally pepper kisses anywhere on his broad, muscular chest except for the two places he wants them most. He hisses out in frustration as you licked a stripe on his pec, right next to his nipple. 

“Y/N, I swear to god,” he groans and looks down at you with dark and hazy eyes. “You’re not gonna be able to walk tomorrow if you keep doing this.”

You smirk up at him, amused at his threat. You’re totally aware that he means it, but you know that he knows, too, how much you like that kind of punishment. “I wouldn’t mind that, baby boy.” You feel a sinking of his chest, a breathy exhale when his favorite pet name of yours for him reaches his ears; you know what a sucker for it he is, and how weak it can make him. 

Keep reading

Someone to Watch Over Me: Part 3

Title: Someone to Watch Over Me

Author:  Dean’s Dirty Little Secret

Series Masterlist

Summary:  Dean reveals what happened to his wife.

Characters:  Dean Winchester, Female reader, Bobby Singer, Tiny, Sam Winchester (mentioned), Georgia (OFC), Melissa (OFC-mentioned), Charlie Bradbury, Tyson Brady

Word Count:  2557

Warnings:  mild language

Author’s Notes:  Inspired by (but does not necessarily follow) the movie The Bodyguard with Kevin Costner and Whitney Houston. This work was beta’d by @mamapeterson and @climbthatmooselikeatree without whose help this wouldn’t even exist. Tag list is full.

***My work is not to be posted on any other sites without my express written permission.***

Keep reading

She finds out about their occupation, but doesn’t run away.

Anon asked: “ Can you do a reaction to where y/n discovers he is the leader of a mafia group. Y/n is shocked and afraid at first but slowly comes to accept it. Y/n doesn’t run away. But just shocked”

Thank you for your request, here you go :)

This started as a short reaction, but somewhere along the way I got lost in my train of thought and this is what happened. I hope that’s okay. #sorrynotsorry

Trigger warning. 

Prologue: You weren’t supposed to find out.He tried to be as careful as he could. But one day you were heading home, a patrol cruiser pulled up and two officers approached you and asked you to come with them for some questioning.
What followed was an hour of grueling interrogation. The detective seemed to be convinced that he was a part of the mafia. A leader actually. So he wanted every bit of information that he could get. After he realised that you truly had no idea what he was talking about, he let you go. But by that time you were already shaking and questioning everything you knew about your boyfriend.

  Jin/ Kim Seokjin
As soon as you entered your apartment, Jin was right in front of you.
“Are you ok, Y/n? What happened? Were you crying?”
“Jin..I..”
“Did someone hurt you
?” His eyes darkened. He was always the protective type.And just thinking about someone hurting you made his blood boil.
“No.. Jin.. I want to ask you something.. But please answer truthfully”
His back straightened as he beheld you. He let out a shaky breath before he asked"
“What is it Y/n? ”
“What is your real occupation?”
“Why are you asking me this right now?”
“Well.. this detective… he said.. you are a mafia leader… Is it true Jin? Why did you never mention this?”

He tensed. You could see in his eyes that he was debating wether or not he should tell you the truth.
“Me being in the mafia.. would it change the way you see me?”
“I don’t know.. I mean, you do kill people, don’t you?”
“Yes, but..you know that I love you,Y/n. My occupation will never change that. And I wanted to keep you in the dark because I didn’t want you to get involved. To know this side of me. To possibly be on my enemy’s radar. I wanted to protect you”
“I understand that, but.. You lied to me. How can I trust you?”
“Please, give me another chance. I will regain your trust. Just, don’t leave me. You are my only happiness .”
He said while coming closer, opening his arms hesitantly. You sighed. But went over to him, letting him pull you into a hug, while nuzzling his nose in the crook of your neck.
“It’s alright. I love you too. And I promise I’ll try. I’ll try to understand and support you”
“Thank you.
.”

Originally posted by yoonjxn


Kim Namjoon/ Rap Monster
You arrived home to a worried Namjoon. “Baby, what’s wrong?” “Nothing.. Don’t worry.”  Namjoon frowned, but he didn’t ask anything else. After all, he had his ways of finding out. And he was not happy. So that night, when he thought you were asleep, he went ahead and made a call “I want him dead. I want his body to never be found, understand?” and then lied next to you again before he fell asleep. But you were wide awake. And you had heard everything. You spent the following hours contemplating what you should do. After a few hours, you have decided. He might be a mafia member, but.. His usual self.. was it just a mask? You had to find out. So you got up and went to the kitchen to make yourself a cup of coffee while you waited for him to get up. About an hour later he  stormed into the room, visibly panicked. “Y/n. I thought… ”
“What? That I ran away?”

“…”
“Why did you never tell me about this? If it wasn’t for that detective, would you have ever told me? ”
“I don’t know.. I was afraid.. I am afraid. That you are going to run away and leave me. Forgetting everything we had toghether just because of my occupation

“I love you, Namjoon. But, I don’t know if I can do this” You saw his eyes darken from the quiet rage now burning under his skin.
“What will hapen if you get caught? What if something happens to you? What if.. What if you get killed? What will I do?”
His gaze imeediatly softened. He came beside you and caressed you face. “None of that will happen. I won’t ever be taken from your side. I promise you that. Just. Stay with me. I need you.” He pulled you into a hug. “I love you. I know this world of mine is fucked up. Please, don’t leave me” He felt your tears on his shirt and pulled away to see you nodding. He released a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “I love you, Y/n”
“I love you too, Namjoon..”

Originally posted by myloveseokjin


Min Yoongi/ Suga

When you have finally arrived home you found Yoongi sleeping on the sofa. Not something out of the ordinary. He looked so peaceful, so beautiful. Angelic even. How could someone like him ever be involved in such a dark occupation?

As if he had heard you,he cracked open an eyelid and stared sleepily at you.
You;re back… where were you?”
“Well.. nowhere important. I… ”
“What is it?
” He looked questioningly at you.
“Is it true that you are a mafia leader?” Better to rip the bandaid right off than to drag things along.
He stiffened. “Why are you asking me this?”
“I just want to know, Yoongi. Was it all a lie? This side of you? Was it all an act?”

He sat up slowly and patted the seat next to him. A silent command. You complied, if only because you wanted to get it over with.
“I would never lie to you. Not about my true self. But I had to hide this part of my life from you because I did not want you to get scared. I wanted you to love me for who I am. ”
“I do love you Yoongi, but-”
“But what?
” He turned to you. Pain and determination to make you stay visible in his eyes.

“I don’t know what the future holds. What will happen if you turn on me? What if I fell out of love with you? Will you let me go? Or will you just hunt me down?” Hurt flashed in his eyes.

“ I would never do that. And if one day you decide that you don’t love me anymore I will understand. I will let you go. But not because you are afraid of my job. That doesn’t influence who I am. And it shouldn’t change your opinion on me either…”

“ Yoongi. .. I promise I will try. I’ll try to understand.”

“That’s all I wanted to hear…Thank you. Thank you Y/n. You don’t know how much it means to me” You pulled him into a soft kiss.

“ We’ll get trough this. Now let’s just get some sleep.”

He flashed his gummy smile, the one you knew he had only when he was truly happy, and pulled you in his arms.

“ I don’t know how I got so lucky.”

Jung Hoseok/ J-Hope

You simply could not believe that your ball of sunshine could ever do such thing. It was just impossible. You had to ask him. So you went over to his apartment. He opened the door, beaming but you could see concern in his eyes.

“Jagi! How are you? Why didn’t you tell me you wanted to come over? I would have prepared something special.”

“It’s alright Hoseok. I just wanted to talk to you.”

He frowned, but opened the door to let you pass.

“Actually… I wanted to tell you something too. But you go first" he said while you went to the couch.

“No, no. You first. I’m curious” you replied as you plopped down.

“Well…” He sat next to you,turned so he could see you. “ I wanted to tell you this for a while. ..but I lied to you… You see … I’m not who you think I am..” “What do you mean?” Realisation started sinking in.

“I am a mafia member Y/n. I fought my way to the top. And now I’m fighting to maintain my place. ” He must’ve seen the lack of surprise on your face because he asked “ But something tells me that you already knew”

“ Actually. I’ve just found out, but I wanted to come here and ask you”

“So… now that you know. .. what are you planning to do?” He asked warily. You looked into his eyes

“I want you to know that even though this is a huge shock for me, you are still my Hoseok. And your job won’t change that. Even though I don’t like being lied to” Relief washed over his features and his brighter-than-the-sun smile broke free. Then grabbed you into a bone-crushing hug.

“Aah, I love you so much Jagi! Thank you for believing in me. ”

You let out a laugh and hugged him back. “After all, what would I do without my sunshine?”

Originally posted by bangbangbangtanx


Park Jimin

As soon as you stepped outside of the building, you saw a familiar car pulling in front of you. And sure enough, Jimin got off and ran to you.

“Y/n! Are you ok? Did those idiots hurt you?

” “Yeah, I’m fine.. How did you know I was here?”

“ It doesn’t matter. Now, let’s go home” You weren’t too thrilled about it, considering what you had just found out, but nodded nonetheless. You needed answers. And you were determined to get them. So as soon as you arrived, you asked: “Jimin.. what is your real occupation ?“ He gripped the steering wheel tighter, but stared right ahead as he said “What’s up with all these questions today? ” You said nothing.

He sighed and turned to you. “I am a mafia leader, Y/n. I am not the good guy in the story. But that doesn’t change the way I feel about. That doesn’t mean that the me you have met is not my real self. ..I’m sorry you had to go trough this today. This is why I tried my best to keep you away from this. But I failed. I’m sorry”

“Listen. . I don’t really care about this.. does it terrify me? Maybe. Does it change the way I see at you? No. I just wish you would have told me sooner. ” Surprise laced his features. “Really? You’re not going to run away, screaming and turn me in? ” “No. I would never do that. I love you, you know?

He gripped your hands in his. “You don’t know how happy that makes me. Thank you. For believing in me” He looked down, overwhelmed .

“I love you”

Originally posted by yourpinkpill



Kim Taehyung

You couldn’t believe this. Tae was your friend since middle school. How come you’ve never seen anything suspicious? You had to dig some information. So you went home. Thankfully he wasn’t there (or so you thought) and you started searching trough his desk for any information.

Y/n.” You froze. And slowly looked up at a stone-faced Tae. “ What are you doing? You know you can always come to me for help. Not rummage trough my things. You know.. that’s not very nice.”

“I…”

“What were you looking for? ”

“I… Is it true? Are you a part of you mafia? ” You hadn’t thought it possible, but his gaze became even harder. “What made you ask such crazy things? ” “Please Tae, just tell me the truth. ”

“You want the truth, huh?” He inched closer to you, bracing his hands on the other side of the desk, staring at you. “I am a mafia leader, Y/n. I do despicable things. But I didn’t want you to know that. Because I can’t let you go. And I promise you. If you try to run away, I will find you. Because I can’t leave without you.”

“Who said anything about running? I’m just shocked that you could hide this from me all this time. But, I care about you. And I would never leave you.how can you think such things?

He straightened up, looking utterly confused, but relieved. “I don’t know, most people wouldn’t have such a calm reaction, you know? You’re so weird sometimes…” You laughed. “ I wonder who I got it from. Now, stop looking so confused and let’s go eat something”.

“What? Aren’t you mad at me?”

“A little. But, I understand why you feared telling me this. I really do. However, I love you and I’m not going to let this ruin our relationship.

He ran up to you and started twirling you around, laughing in delight. “I don’t know how I ever got so lucky. I don’t deserve you, Y/n”

“Oh, shut up.”

“I love you too ”

Originally posted by jjks


Jeon Jungkook

You looked at your phone and saw a bunch of missed calls from him. Great.  Just great. You had to call him. He answered at the first ring.

“Where are you? Did something happen? Why didn’t you answer my calls?” “It’s.. a long story. Are you home? I’ll tell you then.” “Yeah, just hurry”

As soon as you got in, he shot up from the sofa “Now will you tell me what happened? I’m dying of concern right here”

“Are you part of the mafia?”

“What? Are you crazy? What makes you ask such things?”

“Well, today a very lovely detective decides to ask me some questions. And I had found out some interesting things, might I add” His eyes started burning with anger.

Y/n. You don’t to have this discussion”

“Yes, I do. Why hadn’t you told me? Why did you lie to me? How could you?” He came right in front of you, his face inches away from yours.

“I wanted to protect you. And I wanted you to look at me like you would at a normal person. I knew that if I would tell you, you would overreact and I wanted you to not see me as a criminal ”

But I don’t, Jungkook. I just want you to be honest. A relationship is built on mutual trust.”

“ I know that and I apologize. But I don’t want to lose you”

“You won’t. Just promise me that you’re going to be honest from now on, ok? ” You said as you cupped his face in your hands and stared into his eyes. His stare softened and he started beaming

“I swear I’m never going to let you down”

“You’d better keep that promise. ” You smiled as he kissed you sweetly.

Originally posted by ohjeonjk

ignore the subs

.

Aah.. I hope you enjoyed it. It was my first time writing a reaction (so pls don’t kill me). - Admin Light

Anan translation - Endo Aya’s strategies for going after the sextuplets.

Totoko’s voice actress’s comments about what the brothers might be like to go out with and her tips on how to win them from the recent Anan special magazine. 

Endo Aya’s strategies for going after the sextuplets.

Totoko-chan, the super cute only girl in the group. She’s very popular with the sextuplets, and we’re as jealous as could be. Together with Endo Aya who performed her, we’re going to examine their manly charms in a somewhat serious way!

She’s Totoko-chan so she understands?! The sextuplets “manly charms.”

The beloved heroine Totoko, whom the sextuplets never stop admiring. Since she is approached by them constantly on a daily basis, she’s bound to know about their attitudes towards love, and (we’re not sure whether or not they actually have any) their manly charms. Therefore, we threw Endo Aya, who played Totoko the closest observer of the sextuplets for half a year, the silly question, “What are they like as men?”

(Endo) To start with, whatever they may say, I think that they are kind boys. No matter how selfish Totoko gets, they face her head on and take the blow. This time, I tried thinking about each of them carefully, but even though they are jobless virgin NEETs who sponge off their family, there are moments when I suddenly felt like they were “good men” and I got flustered, lol. Despite telling myself that “If I went out with them they’d definitely be a burden,” I had a hard time keeping my cool. (Lol)

So she has analysed each of their manly charms, from Osomatsu to Todomatsu, and has proposed her strategies for going after them.

With this you can be just like Totoko… perhaps?

Keep reading

2D’s brain

“Do car tires get tired of being tires?”

“When the clouds disappear, does the sky miss them?”

“Forks and knives make a good couple.”

“A spork is the offspring of a fork and spoon.”

“Wait, how do does a fork and spoon have sex?”

“Does the sun and moon know each other?”

“Are all the stars in the sky the moon’s children?”

“They’re all scattered around, so he’s not a good father to them.”

“I like mayonnaise on my jelly.”

“Does Burger King have a Burger Queen?”

“A pancake is really a cake that’s cooked in a skillet. I gotta tell Muds that.”

“Can you make a pancake in the oven?”

“French fries are really just tanning in grease.”

“Why won’t my lighter work?!”

“I wish Murdoc could sod off.”

“Does a tree live in a tree house?”

“I ran out of peppermint tea. I’m sad now.”

“Buy more pink socks.”

“I miss my orange shirt.”

“The letters of the alphabet are different genders.”

“Jupiter is one thicc bih.”

“Does a kite smoke weed so it can fly high?”

“I wonder if water can drink itself. And if it pees itself out.,,ew.”

“Black holes must be good at giving head because they keep sucking. You’ll turn into spaghetti though, so it’s a bunch of wasted kids.”

“Peanut butter cannot live without jelly or bread. Squad goals.”

“A cigar is just a fancy version of a cigarette.”

“What happens when your nose runs away from you?”

“I like how my shoes sound against the floor in the basement. Shh shh.”

“I wonder if Murdoc misses his family. I mean, he’s turned into a fully developed human and the rest of them are being put inside jars or packages. I feel bad for all of them.”

The Best Thing On The Internet Today - February 20, 2017

In that case here’s a $20. 

It checks out. 

Same. 

I’m running away from my responsibilities and it feels good.  

Blue and White Blossoms

@sir-scandalous this is the hanahaki Shance au I mentioned, it was written a few months ago, and I pretty much forgot about it until you mentioned hanahaki disease in a post, and I remembered I wrote something for a hanahaki au. I posted it and hope you like it! 

It might be awful, I’m not the best author.



Lance sat on the observation deck, watching the stars and universe. It was once a dream, to go into space, and to travel the universe… Lance winced as his chest suddenly burst into flames nearly, it hurt, but it was gone just as quickly. He blinked at the stars, something he’s used to seeing so often now.

He managed to go into space, along with his team and rival, and his hero. Thrown into a war they didn’t know about, something ten thousand years in process. Fighting for the fate of the universe, to protect their home planet and many others, most of which had no idea they were even doing it.

It made Lance’s eyes burn with the beginning of tears, and he blinked them back. He was afraid of someone seeing him cry, of seeing his facade dropped. He wasn’t really useful, or talented, but the least he could do is keep the team together, happy and laughing, even if it means he will be hurt in the process and he would suffer in the dark, quiet and hidden.

Lance also knew he was far too self-sacrificing, taking on the anger of the others to keep them from fighting with themselves, hiding his pain and accepting others to bring out smiles. He knew it was not good to do it, but he was far too much like his oldest sister, too self-sacrificing and willing to suffer for others.

Ah, not good… Lance grimaced as he felt his eyes blur, wiping his tears, Lance stiffened as footsteps echoed in the halls, getting closer to him. Blinking away tears and plastering a fake smile, though he could feel he wasn’t doing to good at it, Lance kept his eyes locked on the stars, the footsteps stopped at the entrance, as if he surprised whomever it was he was there.

Well, of course he did, he shouldn’t be up so late anyways. Lance turned and blinked at the figure who had stopped in the doorway.

“Lance? What are you doing up?” Shiro asked, continuing to walk up to him. Lance almost flinched when the pain returned to his chest.

“Ah, Shiro. I couldn’t sleep, figured I would watch the stars.” Lance laughed as he looked out to the stars again, he was afraid to look at Shiro, he was found in a weak spot and he didn’t want Shiro to notice. He wasn’t a fool, he knew Shiro was more observant than he let on, and that was dangerous.

“Oh?” Shit, Shiro didn’t believe him “I hope you don’t mind me joining you” Shiro said and Lance nodded, trying to act tired to make up for his lack of boisterous nature.

Lance stared out at the stars and found his mind turning to his previous thoughts, his older sister Mira. He was very close to her and- Shaking his head discreetly, Lance forced his thoughts away, to talking with Blue, or teasing Pidge.

“Lance? You ok?” Shiro asked and Lance jumped a bit, Shiro was looking at him, trying to see his face. Lance blinked back more tears and turned to flash Shiro a smile.

“Of course!” Lance said, pulling on as much bravado as he could, but he was tired from holding up his mask all day, he hadn’t expected anyone to come into the observatory so he wasn’t prepared to throw it back up again.

“Lance.” Shiro was using that tone, Lance knew it too well, it wasn’t the Lance, enough tone, it was the I’m not that easy to fool, so start talking tone. He’s used it on Lance plenty enough times, but Lance always managed to escape it. No one was around to make a distraction, he couldn’t pick a fight with Keith, or use Hunk as a way of escape.

“I miss home.” Lance said, not entirely telling the truth. Shiro’s eyes softened as he nodded, Lance couldn’t help the feeling in his chest as he realized just how deep in love he was, and just how bad that was.

“We all do… It’s ok to be homesick, we all are. Protecting home is important too.” Shiro said and Lance bit his tongue to keep from lashing out, he was getting irritated, but he knew he shouldn’t be. He wasn’t used to being worried over, it was weird because he was so used to keeping people from noticing, he’s forgotten what it’s like.

“I-I know… I’m not going to leave, I just… feel bad for worrying my family, they have no idea where I am.” Lance said, before shaking his head and letting out a laugh, though it sounded empty to his own ears.

“Lance…”

“I’m fine, just tired is all.” Lance said, standing up and backing away a bit. Shiro stood up as well, and when he reached out to set a comforting hand on Lance’s shoulder, Lance fled.

“Good night Shiro.” Lance said, before turning tail and nearly running from the room. He heard Shiro mutter a ‘good night’ too, but he had been so focused on getting away he didn’t register it much.

Making it to his room, Lance sat on his bed and closed his eyes, clutching his chest as it became difficult to breathe. Lance coughed suddenly, it hurt and burned as he violently tried to expel whatever was in his lungs.

Lance blinked at the handful of petal in his hand, a few violet ones and white petals, blood was with them. Not much blood, but there was still some. A little blood dripped from his chin and Lance used his free hand to wipe it off as he let out a laugh.

Lance knew it was possible, despite how rare it was. He seen it happen, and now, he get’s to learn more about it… Because the seeds have already been planted.

Now they’re blooming, and things are going to get difficult.


Lance had always been told he was so much like Mira, too self-sacrificing and too quick to take the pain of others. Too thoughtful, too selfless, too much kindness and not enough selfishness.

He was too much like his beloved oldest sister, too quick to make people happy, no matter how much it hurt…

Now he was even more like her, falling in love and it being unrequited. Too sentimental to give up his feeling of love, and too selfless to tell anyone about it in fear it becomes requited because of it.

Hanahaki.

Laughing bitterly, Lance crushed the flowers in his hand as he shook his head, tears falling. His love would not be requited, there was no possibility, and because he knew that, and accepted it, they bloomed.

Shoving the flowers into a drawer, Lance cleaned his hands before running one hand through his hair. He knew it was foolish, he was too selfless to fall in love, too quick to accept his fate, too dearly holding on to something knows he can’t have.

Maybe that’s why he laughed, knowing he couldn’t fix it. He knew when the seeds were planted, he knew it, because he knew his feelings, so he knew when they started.

Coughing more, Lance stuffed more flowers into the drawer, wiping his hands on his black flight suit. Sitting on his bed, Lance recalled the day he found out Mira had Hanahaki.

Lance sighed as he finally got home, he managed to escape his bullies. Mira was visiting and he was excited to see her. She had been seeming down lately, her skin grew paler, she lost her bright smiles and grins, and she began to lock herself away. She was coming home more often though, and he he tried to make her happy, telling her stories and adventures he had just to get her to laugh, because she was pretty when she laughed.

He was happy to see her, he never really asked about her, because his Mama and Papa would grow sad. So he kept quiet and waited for the times she would visit.

Running inside, he set his bag down and ran towards her room to see if she was already there, only to stop at gagging in the bathroom. Quietly peeking through the crack in the door, to see his beloved sister vomiting in the toilet. He went in to rub her back and hold her hair back, he did it for his other sisters when they were sick, and some of his long haired brothers. It always made him feel better to know he could help out, even if it was just a little.

“Hermana?” Lance whispered, and his eyes widened in horror when he saw her vomiting up flowers and blood… Lots of it. He panicked and rushed to her, hugging her and sobbing, all the while she cried and hugged him close, whispering in a hoarse voice about how sorry she was.

Two months later, Lance came home and looked for his sister, she began living with them again, only to find her collapsed on the floor, blood and flowers pooled around her body.

“Mama! Mama! Mira, Mama, Mira!” Lance frantically called his mother, who rushed home to find him wailing and hugging his sister. The flowers grew and wrapped around her lungs in vines and blossoms, filling them and tearing them open, while crushing her ribs. She suffocated on the flowers and blood, dying at the delicate age of 23.

It killed Lance inside.

“Lance! Wake up!” Hunk called through the door and Lance jumped, he hadn’t realized he had been so lost in his memories. Tears fell down his cheeks and he was shaking, wiping his eyes Lance frantically shut the drawer with the petals in it. Mira died long ago, twelve years ago, and… He might just join her.

Standing up, Lance put on his armor and left his room, meeting Hunk in the hallway. He missed breakfast so Hunk came to check on him. Lance smiled confidently as he patted Hunk’s shoulder, playing his normal overconfident self.

“Sorry Hunk, Beauty sleep is important!” Lance boasted as Hunk lead him to the kitchen. Him and Hunk talking as normal, the day going by like every other. Training, talking, bonding.

Of course, Lance limited his interactions with Shiro the best he could, because he loved him. It was a horrible thing to know it would never be requited, and he almost got over his feelings for the slightly older teen, only to suddenly help save him and be trapped on the same ship with him. He hid his feelings so well, at least, until he acknowledged he wouldn’t have his feelings returned.

Then the flowers bloomed and his chest began to burn and contract. It got worse the more Shiro smiled and praised, the more Shiro touched him, the more he looked at Shiro.

It hurt, so so much. He wouldn’t let anyone know, and always brushed off their concern with a joke or snarky comment. Shiro would look at him suspiciously, after running into him on the observation deck, Lance never returned, instead hanging out in Blue’s hangar.

Shiro obviously knew Lance was limiting their interactions, and he didn’t look pleased at all. Lance laughed and joked with Hunk, teased Pidge, and bickered with Keith as usual during lunch, but then Shiro walked in and Lance’s chest constricted painfully, the more he was around Shiro, the more his love solidified and the more flowers grew, constricted, and filled his lungs. Lance rubbed his chest, trying to make it seem unsuspicious, before he excused himself from lunch.

“I’m heading to visit Blue.” Lance said as he stood up, Shiro had been there for a few minutes, but the pain was getting bad, the disease was getting worse. Standing up, Lance quickly turned and left the room, aware someone was following him. Turning, Lance tensed, it was Hunk and the look on Hunk’s face told Lance this wasn’t going to be pleasant.

“Lance, you feeling ok?” Hunk asked and Lance went to sigh, but leaned against the wall with a shoulder as he coughed harshly into his hands, eyes widening at the horrible timing, blood poured into his hand, as well as a bunch of petals, blue and white. Hunk gasped in horror.

“Lance! You have Hanahaki?” Hunk cried and Lance looked around, glad no one seemed to hear, because no one came rushing up.

“Hunk shh! It’s fine.” Lance said as he stuffed the flowers and blood into his pocket. Hunk opened his mouth to argue, but Lance shook his head. “Please Hunk, don’t tell anyone.”

“Who? Who is it?” Hunk asked and Lance frowned, he couldn’t tell Hunk it was Shiro. If Shiro knew, he would reciprocate his feelings, and Lance would feel like shit. Hunk set a comforting hand on Lance’s back as they leaned against the wall, Hunk partially blocked Lance from the end of the hallway where the kitchen was. The comforting affection and trust in him had Lance breaking, he couldn’t lie to Hunk anymore, he couldn’t do that to his best friend.

“I-It's… It’s Shiro.” Lance whispered, and Hunk blinked before he began to hug Lance closer. “I didn’t think I fell so hard. It’s… It started blooming when I realized I couldn’t be with him, it… It wasn’t possible.”

“This is going to be just like-” Hunk swallowed heavily, the weight of it hitting him. “Just like Mira…” Lance just nodded, and it was quiet before Hunk took a deep breath and sighed.

“Ok… I won’t tell anyone. But if they find out on their own, I’m not covering.”

“Thank you Hunk.” Lance whispered, leaning into Hunk as he wrapped him in an embrace, Lance loved Hunk’s hugs, it was comforting and warm. It felt safe, even with him dying. It hurt so much more to force his best friend to keep his feelings hidden, the chest pressure and pain was horrible, but he hated doing this to Hunk.

“You know, now I’m dying in a beautiful way.” Lance joked dryly and Hunk groaned as he tightened his grip. Hunk was a great friend, and though he knew Hunk would be distraught about Lance refusing to confess to Shiro, he still would keep his promise. The cure was right there, and Lance refused it, and it was going to kill Hunk inside.

“Please don’t joke about this… Never something this serious.” Hunk said and Lance nodded, before he was released and Hunked watched him go to the Blue lion’s hangar. Lance spent a lot of time there, Hunk often seen him sitting with the Blue lion and talking to her, sometimes he was in the Blue lion, sometimes just polishing her metal. The two were close, even Coran and Allura admitted that Lance and Blue had an unusually strong bond, even for the blue lion being the one of loyalty, bravery, and courage.

Hunk sighed as he turned to go back to the kitchen, blinking a bit in surprise as Shiro stepped out, nearly bumping into him.

“Oh, Hunk. Is Lance ok?” Shiro asked and Hunk nodded, smiling as he rubbed his neck.

“Yeah, Lance is ok. Just a little homesick is all.” Hunk said, turning and going into the kitchen, he was a terrible liar, and if he didn’t get away, he’d break his promise to Lance.


Shiro noticed it more during training, a while after Hunk found out. He had been noticing Lance was seemingly ignoring him, only talking with him when it came to missions, training, or when Shiro scolded him. Lance wasn’t joking around or just talking with him anymore, and it hurt.

Lance had been sparring with Keith when he had jolted, and slid around Keith before dropping his bayard and bolting from the room.

“Bathroom.” was all he choked out as Keith blinked in surprise and the others confusedly looked at each other. Hunk worriedly watched the door, Shiro nearly chased him down, but decided to wait.

It was nearly twenty minutes before Lance finally came back, his eyes were slightly puffy and his hair was ruffled a bit, most likely from running his hands through it. Lance looked pale, and that’s extremely worrying because the teen was normally tan. Lance laughed off their concern his hands stuffed into the pockets of his armor.

Keith grouched at Lance for running off in the middle of their spar, poking at Lance for being afraid, and Lance pointed a dark, kind of damp looking, gloved hand at Keith saying something about Keith’s mullet making him sick.

Shiro sighed and broke up the impending argument, catching on to the quick dodge Lance made to avoid Shiro’s touch. Turning and huffing, Lance turned to Hunk. Nothing was said, but Hunk smiled and Lance grinned back, something didn’t feel right and Shiro resisted the urge to force Lance to speak up. There was something he was missing.

If it was serious, Lance would say something. He never hesitated to say anything before.

“Let’s continue.” Lance said, turning back to Keith after retrieving his bayard. Shiro watched in concern as Lance sparred with Keith, he was hiding something, and it was bothering Shiro…

More frustrating, Lance was avoiding Shiro.

~

Shiro didn’t want to bring it up, and he kept telling himself Lance would tell him eventually. Lance, however, continued to joke around and play it off, avoiding him, and coughing into his hand and dismissing it. Shiro admitted that if it wasn’t for the slight red on Lance’s hand, Shiro may have let it be.

Lance hid it well, frighteningly well that if he hadn’t caught on to something being wrong, he wouldn’t have known. Anytime someone brought up his cough, he would brush it off with his usual overconfidence and bravado. Shiro kept telling himself that if it was serious, Lance would tell him, but the way Lance has been avoiding their interactions made it clear he wouldn’t. So when Lance suddenly got up from dinner, spewing some excuse and bolting, Shiro followed him.

Lance had run to the bathroom and was crouched to to the toilet, huffing and coughing. Lance laughed weakly as he ran a shaking hand through his hair.

“Haha, figures…ack.” Shiro flinched when Lance started coughing, and vomiting, the sound of liquid hitting the toilet made Shiro worry. At first, he sounded like he had a space flu or something, but then Lance leaned back on his heels and put his slightly red stained hands on his knees, and Shiro caught sight of the blood splatters on the toilet seat and flower petals. Frozen in horror, Shiro watched as Lance suddenly threw himself over the toilet again and began vomiting more blood and petals, a lot of it.

“Lance?!” Shiro yelled as he rushed up, Lance’s eyes widening in horror at the sight of Shiro. “What’s going on?!” Shiro demanded and Lance scrambled and flushed the toilet, and blocked the blood on the seat as he faced Shiro.

“Nothing! It’s just the space flu!” Lance said quickly, and Shiro floundered for a minute, he didn’t actually know what space flu looked like, but this didn’t seem right.

Lance.” Shiro knew his sounded angry, and Lance flinched before standing up and shoving his hands in his pocket, his tense shoulders relaxed as Lance sighed, though it sounded rough. Lance could feel the barbs and vines in his throat and lungs.

“Seriously Shiro, it’s just the space flu, I didn’t say anything because it’ll just pass.” Lance said and Shiro pinched the bridge of his nose in anger, and to hide his hurt. He hated that Lance was hiding something from him, he may not know what the space flu looked like but something in the back of his head was telling him- screaming at him not to believe what Lance was saying, that something wasn’t right.

“I-Next time, you better tell what the hell is really going on.” Shiro said, his voice was intimidating and Lance looked away as Shiro stormed out of the bathroom, too angry to stay there and too afraid to let his hurt show and cause a problem. He was angry that Lance was lying to him, afraid that Lance didn’t trust him, it made his chest ache and burn.

Lance sagged on the bathroom floor, weakly breathing as tears welled up in his eyes. Brushing them away, he cleaned the blood up and the flowers, before making his way to his room. Lance was relieved that Shiro didn’t seem to remember what Hanahaki was, but he was also disgusted in himself for being caught.

“What am I supposed to do? I’m a fool.” Lance whispered to no one as he fell onto his back, the soft and comforting Altean mattress didn’t help his despair. Lance curled into himself and cried, quiet sobs and his body wracking in pain. The flowers blooming in his chest making it hard to breathe.

He was hurting everyone he loved, this disease was horrible. It was getting harder to hide, but now that Shiro knew, Lance was terrified everyone else would know. Blinking his teary eyes, Lance couldn’t stop the horrible memories from getting to him.

Mira coughing up blood and flowers, Angela starting to as well before being put into surgery. Lance threw and arm over his eyes as he let out a watery chuckle, though his chest burned and tightened.

“I’m sorry.” he whispered, he wasn’t going to have his feelings removed with the flowers. It was horrible. Angela never truly loved after that, and the one she loved never connected to her again, their bond ruined by the feelings being taken. He couldn’t risk ruining the bond, however fragile it must be now, with Shiro.

He couldn’t risk it, only hope that he could last long enough to do his duty until his death. Lance’s blue eyes dripped tears, locked onto the ceiling as he bitterly laughed, though it hurt terribly.

“It’s unfair.” His muttered, the beautiful flowers that fell from his lips, white hydrangeas and blue wisteria blossoms. Unfairly beautiful signs of his upcoming death. He always hated Hanahaki, it took Mira, shattered his family, stole an important bond from little Angela. She was only twelve, she didn’t deserve such a fate at a young age.

Sleep stole him away, into a darkness too terrifyingly familiar. Hospitals and graves, the very flowers trapped in his beloved sisters lungs graced the floor as she had her love taken, and familiar beautiful flowers gracing a far too familiar grave. Nightmares of memories, his broken family, his sisters, his scared little siblings, sad older siblings, his Mama’s broken heart, his Papa crying for the first time, but not the last.


Lance shot up in his bed, tears cascading down his face as he covered his mouth to muffle the screams that he knew would have been ripping from his throat had the flowers not been choking him. Coughing more up in the bathroom, Lance stumbled toward the hangars, he wanted to talk to Blue, to apologize for being too weak to give up his love. Only, he bumped into Keith, who was coming out of his room.

“What? What the hell are you doing up?” Keith whispered, but Lance only shook his head, reigning himself into control.

“Don’t worry about it mullet.” Lance said with his usual snark, but Keith only narrowed his eyes.

“What’s going on with you? Everyone is worried sick!” Keith hissed and Lance turned away, he could tell Keith was clenching his fists and gritting his teeth, he was too easily angered and impatient.

“Nothing you need to worry about mullet. It shouldn’t matter.” Lance said, he felt bad for his irritation, but he didn’t want Keith to know. He didn’t want anyone to know at all. Pulling from Keith’s reach, Lance turned and stalked down the hall to Blue, Keith fuming in the hallway. As soon as he was out of sight, Lance ran to Blue, rushing up to her as he coughed a few more flowers up.

“Hey Blue, I’m sorry.” He said as he ran a hand along her metal paw, the resounding purr through their bond and link comforted him.

Worry… Paladin… Affection. Lance smiled at the feelings, and laughed a bit at the image of them flying together.

“Of course Blue, til the moment every blossom stops.” Lance said and Blue rumbled in sadness, and Lance lowered his eyes a bit.

“I know, but there isn’t anything we can do Blue, I’m weak, I can’t risk it. I’m so sorry.” Lance said and Blue rumbled again, bending her head down so Lance could rub her nose, even though he knew she couldn’t feel it. He still did it because he knew she enjoyed it.

“I’ll do my best, but I can’t promise you something I can’t control. Night Blue.” Lance whispered, watching his lion return to her position. Leaving the hangar, Lance headed back to his room.

~~~~

Training the next day was awful, everyone was tensed and watching him in worry. Pidge knew something was off, but because no one said anything or jumped at him, Lance knew no one but Hunk knew of his disease. Shiro didn’t remember what it was, and he didn’t seem to go to Pidge with his concerns, so Lance continued training.

He did well, despite the pain and suffocating feeling. It wasn’t until Lance suddenly leaned over and began gasping as a flower blocked his air way. Coughing, Lance’s eyes widened in horror as everyone rushed over to him. Shaking away the hands and escaping, Lance collapsed against the wall of the training room, he faintly heard someone stop the training. Lance held a hand against the wall for support as everyone called out for him in worry, but his vision was going dark as he tried to dislodge the flower in his throat.

It was a full patch of Hydrangea, not just a few tiny individual blossoms. Lance weakly groaned as someone grabbed his shoulders.

Shit…” Was all he gasped out, as he slumped down, everything going dark.

~

Lance sprung up from the bed he was laid in, the burning in his chest and constriction was still there. Blinking, Lance barely registered someone speaking, maybe to him or not… He couldn’t tell.

“M-Mira…” Lance choked out as a petal fell from his lips. Suddenly, he noticed someone was shaking him. Eyes adjusting, he realized it was Coran, and he was speaking.

“C-Coran?” Lance asked Coran sighed, Pidge was in the room too. Rubbing his eyes, Lance turned to Coran.

“Pidge and Hunk explained to me what this Hanahaki disease is. Quiet odd that flowers grow in your chest. But! It would be rather easy to remove them, despite that you have a rather lot.” Coran said and Lance shook his head, waving off Coran as he stood.

“Lance, don’t be stupid.” Pidge said and Lance sighed as he tested his balance, before sticking his hands into his pocket.

“I’m not… I know what this does.” Lance said and Pidge rubbed her eyes. Lance groaned as he turned to face her.

“Lance! This isn’t something you can just brush off!” Pidge yelled, frustrated tears collecting in her eyes as Coran set a hand on her shoulder.

“If nothing changes, you’ll be getting the surgery no matter what.” Coran stated and Lance shot a bitter look at the Altean.

“No. Nope. Not gonna happen.” Lance said as he stalked towards the door, Pidge groaned and followed him, but he didn’t miss her worry.

“Lance, we need to tell the others. You shouldn’t be hiding this.” Pidge spoke up and Lance whirled on her, a horrified and fear wracked expression.

“No!” Lance said and Pidge jumped, before Lance turned away and covered his eyes. “Please, just… Let me tell them, I just need a little time.”

“Lance! You have fucking flowers in your lungs!” Pidge cried out exasperated and Lance turned to look at her, blue eyes glistening with tears.

“Please Pidge.” Lance muttered and Pidge’s breath hitched but she nodded, though he knew she would tell them if he didn’t sometime soon.

~~~~

Lance didn’t get to his room in time, hoping to avoid Shiro. He knew the others knew he had Hanahaki, but he knew Keith and Hunk wouldn’t say anything. Keith, because he probably was too emotionally distraught and Hunk was probably panicking so they wouldn’t be able to explain.

Lance seen his room, but failed to get there because Shiro suddenly grabbed him by the waist, pinning him to the wall. Lance tried to force his feelings down, he couldn’t start blushing and stuttering, this wasn’t the time.

“You aren’t going anywhere, now talk.” Shiro growled out, his flesh arm was gripping his waist and his Galra arm was on the wall beside Lance’s head.

“I-I don’t know-” Shiro caged Lance in more at Lance’s attempt at escaping. Shiro narrowed his eyes as he kept Lance trapped.

“Lance-” Shiro was cut off as Lance shook his head, trying to figure a way to escape.

“It’s nothing Shiro!” Lance exasperatedly said, he couldn’t tell him it was because he loved him. It would put unnecessary blame on Shiro. He couldn’t blame himself if Lance never told him.

“This isn’t nothing Lance!” Shiro yelled and Lance tried pushing Shiro away, but the slightly older teen refused. Fully pinning Lance against the wall, Shiro narrowed his eyes, daring Lance to lie.

Then the alarms went off, signalling they were under attack. Shiro growled as he narrowed his eyes at Lance.

“We aren’t done talking.” Shiro said, before letting Lance free, and they both ran to the hangars. Getting into their lions, Lance let out a relieved breath.

Lance felt awful, Shiro may have sounded angry, but Lance has a lot of siblings, he knew when someone was using anger to hide worry and fear.


The Galra kept them from forming Voltron, so they had to fight separately. Lance coughed up more flowers, Blue keeping them from being damaged while he threw up more flowers and blood. It was getting worse, the flowers were nearly fully bloomed and there was more blood.

Lance glanced at the controls and sighed a bit, the rest were doing good. Rushing and clearing more ships, Lance cursed in spanish as he was knocked to the ground. Blue was knocked out of commission for the most part. Lance could hear the others yelling at him as he left Blue, yelling at him to return to the controls.

“Blue’s out of commission, gonna have to do it the hard way.” Lance yelled back, shooting all the Galra rushing towards him, shooting ships out of the sky, protecting Blue the best he could.

“Lance! It’s not safe!” Shiro yelled at him, and Lance felt bad, there was terror in Shiro’s tone and he couldn’t help but like the concern. Shoving it back, Lance choked as his body felt on fire, his chest was crushing and he couldn’t breathe, but he kept shooting.

It wasn’t long till Blue jumped back in and blasted a Glara ship out of the sky, saving Lance from what would have been his demise. The battle was done and Lance could hear everyone breathing out and calming down over the comms.

“Lance?” Hunk spoke and Lance put his bayard away. Grunting, Lance began coughing violently, the terrified voices of his friends nearly overlapping each other over the comms.

“Lance!”

“Shit! Lance!”

“What the hell is going on Lance?!”

“Don’t you dare Lance!”

Lance blinked at the waterfalls of blood and flowers falling from his lips. Blinking blearily, Lance heard him being yelled at not to pass out. Lance laughed though, as he hunched over and began vomiting up more waterfalls of blood and flowers, so beautiful despite the fact that it was a sign he was going to die soon.

“Lance! Shit, don’t- god please!” Shiro cried into the comms, and Lance felt himself chuckle bitterly. He didn’t see his life flash before his eyes like in books or something, he just felt the pulling sensation in the back of his mind. He was in a lot of pain, and he felt weak as the world seemed to darken.

“O-Oh shit…” Lance said as the black lion landed near him, he looked at the ridiculous amount of blood and flowers, there was so much.

Lance finished coughing, and blinked at the figure running towards him as he crumpled. He got caught before fully hitting the ground as all the lions landed. Blinking up, Lance realized Shiro was yelling at him and looked on the verge of tears.

“Lance! Shit shit shit, don’t close your eyes!” Shiro was yelling, not understanding what was going on as the others dropped to their knees around him. He vaguely noted that Shiro wasn’t mad anymore, if anything, he look horrified.

“Shit! Why didn’t you tell anyone you had Hanahaki?” Keith yelled and Lance let out a pained cough, another flower falling from his mouth.

“I-I did…” Lance weakly said and Hunk shook his head.

“You should have told us all, not convinced me to keep quiet.” Hunk cried and the group began to panic. Pidge muttering quick explanations on the Hanahaki disease while Shiro rushed Lance to his lion. Hunk and Yellow brought Blue up to the castle ship while Shiro panicked with Lance and his fading pulse.

“Shit, god, Lance please.” Shiro muttered in panic as tears fell. He didn’t know what to do, he was missing to many memories, he couldn’t remember what Hanahaki disease’s cure is or if there even was a cure. His chest was burning and he felt like he was suffocating, fear and terror ripping him apart at the seams.

“I-It’s F-Fine…” Lance weakly said as he struggled to breathe, the flowers were getting worse, it was almost time. It’s been going on since they left Earth, but Lance has loved Shiro longer than that, which was why it was so bad.

“It’s not! Please, oh shit, Lance don’t leave… What do I do?” Shiro was definitely panicking now as they landed in the hangars.

“D-Don’t… Don’t let them… re-remove my l-love.” Lance muttered and Shiro blinked, before he finally remembered.

“Shit shit, who do you love? Fuck, we can find a way to-”

“S-Shiro… S-Stop…” Lance whispered and Shiro began to sob as he ran from his lion to the infirmary.

“Y-You can’t die! P-Please, d-don’t leave us… Don’t leave me.” Shiro cried, his hidden feelings, locked and pushed way coming to light. The others remained quiet as Pidge cried with Hunk, and Keith kept his eyes cast on the floor, tears dripping from his chin, Allura and Coran unable to do anything.

“S-Sorry…. S-Shiro.” Lance muttered as he lifted a shaky hand to Shiro’s cheek, having been placed on a medical bed. Shiro felt his chest burn, it hurt so bad, but he was too distraught to care.

“Please Lance… I love you.” Shiro begged, the last part his whispered as he closed his eyes and sobbed, the other paladins already past that point as they openly sobbed, wailed, and cried. Allura turned away and Coran covered his teary face in his hand.

Lance fell limp, and that was what shattered everyone. Shiro stood up, his chest aching as he brushed Lance’s hair back. Lance’s head fell to the side, everyone calmed down and grief strickenly moved over to Lance.

Only for blood and flowers to fall from his lips, Lance began to violently cough and hack it up. The blood stopped coming, but Lance continued to cough.

“Lance!”

“Shit, breathe man breathe!”

“He’s choking Keith, he can’t breathe!”

“Not the time Pidge!”

“Q-Quiznak-” Lance muttered before violently coughing again, Shiro helped him sit up, though Lance kept leaned over as he hacked up flowers. There were so many that just piled up, Shiro was terrified, and the other’s panicked as they tried to help, rubbing Lance’s back, helping Lance remove the flora by gently pulling the flowers and vines out.

It was a long painful process, but Lance finally fell still. Panicked, Pidge checked his pulse, but breathed in relief at the weak, but still there, pulsing. Lance was quickly scanned and laid back down, until those last few flowers come out, Coran couldn’t put him into a cryopod. Shiro didn’t let anyone try to perform the surgery, Lance had been adamant about that.

Then, about an hour later, Lance began coughing again, so they helped him up and lean over, as more flowers fell, then silence.

Everyone started crying, he was breathing, and coughing, but no more flowers fell from his lips. Coran scanned him again, before rushing him into a cryopod.

Then it was a waiting game. Shiro never left the room, watching Lance rest in the pod and heal, others came in and watched over him, or made Shiro eat.

Not once did Shiro leave the infirmary.

~

Lance vaguely remembered collapsing after the battle was over, he remembered darkness and flowers, then he remembered Shiro holding him and crying as Lance talked to him, but Shiro didn’t hear him over his panic and tears.

It’s fine… I accepted this… He remembered thinking that he was going to die choking on his blood and pretty flowers, though he thought it was nice to be in the arms of someone he loved.

Then Mira crossed his mind, she died alone, in pain and suffering, and Lance felt awful to have the person he loved hold him while he died.

Then he was thrown into darkness again, blood and familiar flowers surrounded him. White hydrangeas, blue wisteria, all so pretty, but they floated endlessly in the blood. Lance cupped one in his hands, vaguely aware that something was off, but unable to register it. Looking at his reflection in the blood, Lance noticed blood dripped from his chin and ran down his bare chest to meet the blood he was waist deep in.

Lance

Blinking he looked around, someone was calling him… Who was it?

Lance!

Shaking his head, he turned back to the blood, only to see a woman in white sitting in a white boat. She was beckoning him with a hand, her skin was nearly translucent, her eyes were closed and long bright hair framed her face. There were flowers falling from her mouth, the same ones Lance seen all around him.

Lance!

Hesitant, Lance decided to ignore the voice, going to the woman. The flowers were beautiful, and maybe she would lead him to other flowers. Reaching to touch the blue wisteria blossoms on the bow of her boat, Lance ripped his hand away as a familiar voice called out again.

Please Lance!

The woman beckoned him more impatiently, and Lance reached out again.

I love you.

Lance blinked as the voice finally opened his eyes. Shiro? Lance wondered, turning from the woman, and looking out over the blood and blackness, tons of white hydrangeas and blue wisteria floated in the blood, but Lance couldn’t see the source of the voice. Suddenly, Lance began to sink in the blood, it whirled around him with the flowers, the woman and boat disappearing.

“Quiznak.” Lance muttered as he was suddenly coughing up flowers and shit tons of them. A little blood too, he heard people talking but he was exhausted, his chest hurt and he felt like he was under water, so everything sounded distorted.

Next thing Lance knew, he was stumbling out of the cryopod, confused, dazed, and tired. Someone caught him, and on instinct, Lance tried to pull away.

“Lance!” the person holding him cried out in relief, and Lance blinked, he couldn’t quite think, his mind fuzzy from the pain he had been in and just coming from the cryopod.

“W-Wha? W-Who?” Lance muttered, coughing violently, but no blood or flowers came out thankfully.

“It’s me, Shiro. Pidge, Hunk, Keith, Coran and Allura too.” The voice said and Lance nodded weakly.

“Ugh… Am I dead?” Lance groaned as he suddenly dropped limp, he heard his name being yelled and then nothing.


Shiro jumped at the sound of Lance’s cryopod opening, the tired teen stumbled out and into Shiro’s arms, saving him from hitting the ground. Shiro hugged him close, so relief swarming his being. The burning lessened, but was still there.

“Lance!” Shiro cried in relief, everyone else jumping and rushing over. Lance coughed violently, but no blood or flowers fell.

“W-Wha? W-Who?” Lance muttered, sounding dazed as he finished coughing. Shiro pulled away a bit as he smiled at Lance.

“It’s me, Shiro. Pidge, Keith, Hunk, Coran and Allura too.” Shiro said, watching Lance in worry. Lance blinked slowly before he nodded weakly.

“Ugh…Am I dead?” Then he suddenly collapsed, but he was still breathing. Shiro hugged him close, before lifting him up. Nodding to the others, they followed Shiro to Lance’s room, only to grimace when they opened the door. Blood and flower petals littered his bed and floor, a half open drawer was filled with bloody flowers, they didn’t even dare look in the bathroom.

“I’ll… put him in my room.” Shiro said and the others nodded, Coran and Hunk moving to clean Lance’s room while Pidge and Keith worriedly watched Lance be moved to Shiro’s room.

Setting Lance down, Shiro covered him and breathed out in relief. The pain in his chest was gone, Lance was alive and breathing. Standing up, Shiro quickly pressed a kiss to Lance’s forehead. He’d apologize for being mad when Lance woke up and was coherent.

He cornered and yelled at Lance because he was worried and upset that Lance was lying to him and hiding things from him. He was fed up with Lance running and avoiding him to, so he pinned Lance to get answers.

Who knew his desperation to strengthen their bond would bring so many complications? For now, Shiro just wanted Lance to be ok.

They would figure the rest out later.


Well there it is, I know it’s short and probably a mess. I love the Hanahaki disease Au, its a great way to have angst and tragedy.

anonymous asked:

How the turtles would act when drunk around their crush?

Leo

He’s very self controlled so when he gets drunk he knows better than to go around you. He’d avoid you and you’d try to get to him. Because he’s drunk he can’t really say anything so he just stays quiet while you chase him and he runs aways from you as best as he can. Of course him being very fit he is way faster than you and you have no choice but to give up. When he gets sober he walks towards you with a blush on his face and apologises for what he did and explain to you why he did it.

Raph

Run, just run. Oh boy, when raph’s drunk you gotta run as fast as you can that is if you still want to be able walk tomorrow. When raph’s drunk he’s SUPER horny so you better watch out. He’ll scream “I LOVE YOU S/O, PLEASE SLEEP WITH ME” and chase after you. You run as fast as you can to run away from raph, well you tried at least. Raph is of course way faster than you and catches you immediately. well get ready for some good fucking

Donnie

This little cinnamon roll would be extra clingy. He’d never leave your side LITERALLY. He’d cling to either your waist, legs or arm. He’ll keep on showering you with random compliments and he’d wont stop saying “I love you so much s/o please accept my feelings” over and over again. The next day when he’s sober he apologises over and over again to you saying that he was drunk and he didn’t mean anything. You get sad and said “so does that mean you don’t like me”. Donnie gets flustered and his face turns red while trying to tell you that he loves you.

Mikey

MY MILKSHAKES BRINGS ALL THE GIRLS TO THE YARD AND THEY’RE LIKE, IT’S BETTER THAN YOURS, DAMN RIGHT

❝ I know, but I am your idiot ❞

Plot: Jungkook jokingly makes fun of you and hurts your feels but makes it up to you 

Pairing: Jungkook xReader

Words Count: 2,1k+

Genre: Slightly angst/ Fluff

For Anon, I hope you like it cutie!

 - kyu.

Gif isn’t mine, credits to the owner!

Originally posted by jengkook

‘Jagiya!!!’ A voice called through your apartment.

‘In here!’ You called from the lounge.

Your handsome boyfriend came walking in with a smile on his face, ‘And just where I left you.’

‘Ha-ha-ha, very funny.’ You mock, jumping up from the couch and into his arms.

He happily received you into his warm embrace as he wrapped his strong arms around your built and lifted you into the air. With one fluid movement, he spun the both of you as your legs wrapped around his waist. Coming to a stand still, you both looked into each others eyes before he closed the gap between the both of you. You accepted his soft touch, as your lips moulded together and he inserted his tongue when your lips parted for him. He tasted every inch as if it was his first time.

Air being needed, you pulled away and pecked his nose, ‘How was America?’

‘Oh sweetheart,’ He carried the both of you to the couch and sat down, ‘It was amazing. Like the language was slightly hard but Joon hyung helped us every step of the way. I wish you were with me!’

‘You know I would have come if I could.’ You stroked his face, ‘I missed you a lot.’

‘I miss you too.’ He replied, brushing your short hair out of your eyes before a teasing smile spread on his face, ‘Yah! Why can’t you have long hair like normal girls?!’

‘You know that I don’t like long hair.’ You rolled you eyes.

This hadn’t been the first time Jungkook teased you about your choice in having short hair. You liked the way it looked on you and to be honest, it was less admin compared to long hair. It wasn’t as if your hair was cut in a boy hairstyle, but being Jungkook, he didn’t ever take that into consideration. You loved him very much, but his childish qualities made you want to run into the wall sometimes.

‘And why can’t you wear skirts and dresses like other girls?’ He joked around once again.

‘Because shorts and jeans are more comfortable.’ You rolled your eyes.

He placed a hand on your leg and tugged at the material slightly, ‘More like sweatpants and pyjamas.’

‘Only when I am home!’ You retaliated, anger running high and feeling hurt, ‘Did you comeback from America just to point out what it wrong with me?’

’Well n-no Y/N -’

‘If you hate the idea of how I dress and look, then why are you with me?’ You pushed him away, tears brimming your eyes, ‘I am sorry that my comfort and choice of clothing does not suit your ideal type, Jungkook.’

‘Jagiya, I-’

‘I’m sorry that I am not like those female idols and models. I AM SORRY THAT I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU!’

With that, you ran towards your bedroom and slammed the door with a swift lock, ‘I was just joking….’

Throwing yourself on the bed, you sobbed into the pillow that still lingered with his scent. Angry and pissed, you threw it towards the chest of drawer located close to the door. The object hit a picture frame that came crashing to the ground, shards of glass decorating around the wooden frame. Clutching your legs to your chest, you cradled yourself as the tears flowed from your eyes. Crying, a knock came from the other side of the door.

‘Go away!’ You shouted, ‘Get out of my apartment right now!’

‘Jagiya, I am sorry.’ He apologised, resting his forehead on the door while his fist still stayed attached to the wood ‘I didn’t mean to upset you. I was just joking.’

‘Well you have a pretty cynical way of joking.’ You sniffed.

‘You are just so cute when you get all upset.’ He tried to lighten the mood.

‘Then I must be fucking adorable right now!’ You seethed, ‘Just get out!’

‘But you tease the ones you love!’ He tried to reason.

‘LEAVE!’

Sighing, he walked away from the door. Message after message, he flooded your phone.

I am sorry baby!

Please let me in? I never meant to hurt you, I would never do that on purpose!

BABY PLWEAAASSEEE! You know I will beg until you let me. You are my one and only, I tease you because I love you. Baby please….

Eventually the messages stopped going through and he figured that you switched your phone off. Every now and then, he would knock on your door and you would scream and shout at him all over again. Jungkook teased you a lot, and you were okay with it. This time just made you feel lower of the low. He had just visited a different country with thousands of beautiful woman and was surrounded by dozens on a daily basis. It felt as if he was comparing you to something you knew you could never become. You were a simple girl studying animation, nothing more and nothing less. Just mundane.

‘Baby?’ He knocked for the fiftieth time as two hours passed before an idea kicked in, ‘The spare key!’ Running to the counter, he opened it up and found the treasure, ‘Bingo!’ Back before your door, he unlocked it with a victory ‘Jagiy….’ He faded out at the sight of you passed out on the bed, ‘Aish, why did you cry yourself to sleep?’

Stroking the side of your face with his index finger, he pulled the sheets back and tucked you in. You snuggled into the sheets and all but smiled when you felt a pillow in your arms. It was the one you threw away. Jungkook pecked your forehead and walked to the shattered frame on the floor. Clicking his fingers, he ran a few errands before coming back to your place an hour later. Slowly you shifted and sat up, rubbing your eyes. Blinking, you noticed a bunch of roses on your chest of draws alongside the picture. But it was in a different frame. Slowly the door opened and Jungkook peeked in.

‘You awake.’ He beamed, pushing the door more and entering with a tray,

‘Did I not ask you to leave?’ You crossed your arms, glaring at him.

‘You did,’ He agreed, placing the tray down, ‘But you know I don’t listen, I am the maknae at the of day.’

‘I don’t want to repeat myself, Jungkook.’ Your voice cold.

‘And neither do I. I made your favourite by the way, but it’s hot so be carful.’ He motioned to the cup of steaming hot chocolate on the bedside table.

‘Jungkook…’ You were about to complain before he placed a finger on your lips and silence you.

‘Enough with the threats, okay?’ He stated, ‘Listen I am sorry for what I said. Sometimes I speak and think you will understand what I mean, but this time I was wrong. So wrong that it caused you pain, and to be honest baby, I hate myself more then anything. The fact that I made you cry made me want to run into moving traffic.’ He held your cheek, brushing your hands over the tear stains, ‘Those tears should never be anything but good happy ones.’

‘But-’

‘Let me finish. Yes you aren’t an idol or model, but I do not care! If I wanted those types, I would be dating them. Y/N, we have known each other since junior high and I have never been the happiest when you agreed to be mine.’

‘I’m so plain and boring.’ You sighed, pulling away from his touch.

‘You say that, but I see a girl who is interesting and different.’ He encouraged, ‘A girl that doesn’t care what anything thinks,’ He leaned in and brushed his lips against your, ‘A girl who makes me proud and happy that she is mine…and only mine.’

You leaned in thinking he was going to kiss you but he quickly scooped you in his arms, flinging you over his shoulder ‘Yah!! Kookie, put me down!’

‘No,’ He looked behind him with a warm smile, ‘I am still apologising.’

‘Still?’ You asked him with a raised brow.

‘So first, we are adorned with a bouquet of beautiful roses,’ He walked by the drawers, ‘The scent that lingers on you everyday and makes me feel like I am floating. Second we are confronted with a picture of you and I. The picture taken on your senior dance and one of my favourite moments I have shared with you so far, and with many more to come. The frame is a sleek black one because of the dress you wore.’

‘You are so cheesy.’ You huffed.

‘Oh baby, you don’t even know the half it.’ He walked out the door.

Your nostrils were ambushed by the scent of sweet smelling fumes and was lightly light with fairy lights. The furniture was rearranged and pillows scattered on the ground. In the middle lay a tray of all your favourite foods and drinks. The TV was on and before it laid a bunch of DVD’s which were all animation. Walking in, you still hung on his shoulder before he got into the centre of the room. Placing you down, he circled his arms around your waist and kissed your neck as he stood behind your body.

‘Before us we see the setting of our first day,’ He reminded, ‘The night we made a blanket fort and watched movies all night with laughs and amazing food.’

‘Kookie…’ You whispered, all anger seeping out.

‘The movies on the floor represent you and I.’ He pointed at them as you removed yourself from his hold and picked up the films, ‘And since you learning to be an animator as well.’

‘Lady and the Tramp?’ You asked with a raised brow.

‘You are my lady, elegant and beautiful while I am the run of the mill tramp.’ He pointed out.

‘You aren’t a tramp.’ You chuckled before picking another, ‘Tangled?’

‘What more then an artistic girl and a goofy man who fall in love through adventure. I want to have many with you Jagiya.’

‘Beauty and the Beast?’

‘A little rough around the edges but I have found my beauty who will turn me into the prince.’

Tears slowly began to well in your eyes as you looked at movie after movie, finally looking at one with a cocked head, ‘Big Hero 6?’

‘You will always be my Baymax, to hold and comfort me through the hard and rough,’ He knelt before you and kissed your forehead, ‘Someone who will never give up on me and always make me feel better.’

‘Jungkook….’ You sniffed.

‘No more tears…please.’ He pressed his forehead against yours, ‘I have caused enough pain for one day.’

‘But this isn’t pain,’ You looked at him, ‘This is tears of happiness, the only tears I am allowed to shed remember?’ He nodded in agreement, ‘But why are you doing this?’

‘What?’

‘Showing me all this love after I wanted you out?’

He chuckled with a hearty laugh, ‘Because you are my Princess and I am nothing but the little frog that will make you happy even if you don’t see it quite yet.’

‘Princess and the Frog reference?’ You asked with a raised brow.

‘I would say its my life motto, but sure, movie reference it is.’ He kissed your nose.

‘Neither,’ You said softly, ‘You aren’t a frog. You are the handsome Jungkook whom is my prince and man I love with every ounce of my heart.’ You admitted, ‘I am sorry for snapping at you…’

‘No I deserved it. I shouldn’t have said what I said, it was wrong of me and I am the one sorry for teasing you.’

‘Well you know what they say, you tease the ones you love.’ You smirked

‘Yah! That isn’t fair, I said that and you wanted to throw me out your house!’

‘That shows how much I love you.’ You smiled, brushing your lips against his and closing the deal with a sweet simple kiss.

It was nothing but a pressing of your lips in his. There was no movement at all, just the two of you frozen and soaking up each others presences and warmth . He had done a lot to make it up to you and proved that he was dearly sorry and loved you will every ounce of his heart. You felt his thumb stroking your cheek as you pulled apart and looked into his eyes deeply.

‘You are such a tease.’ He said softly.

‘Says the pot to the kettle.’ You shrugged your shoulders, standing up with him in tow. He laughed as he shook his head and lifted you in a tight hug, ‘You are such an idiot sometimes.’

‘I know, but I am your idiot Y/N. I love you….’

Dating Jason Blossom Would Include:

• Him asking you out on a date at Pop’s, when no one else was around to see you two

• Rejecting him at first because of his reputation at school, and his failed previous relationships

• Him trying to convince you to give him one chance

• You eventually accepting his offer after a lot of convincing 

• Your first date being at Sweetwater River, where he took you on a boat ride while his family wasn’t home

• Seeing a completely different Jason than you expected on your first date

• Him confessing about hating his reputation at school, an how he wished he didn’t have it

• “They don’t know me, they know ‘Jason Blossom, the captain of the football team’. I just wish they would want to know me

• Pretending not to know each other at school to protect both of you

• One day Reggie talks about seeing you and Jason, so the football team humiliates you, Jason included

• Countless apologies from Jason that night

• “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry… I didn’t want to but I just-”

• Him confessing about his family being abusive ( After episode 5, I am convinced that they are at least verbally abusive )

• Him also confessing that he acts the way he does because his family wants to keep their reputation, and ‘kindness isn’t included in the reputation’

• Forgiving him despite him telling you that you shouldn’t

• “It’s not worth it- you’ll end up getting hurt. I don’t want you dealing with that”

• Ignoring his argument completely

• “Jason, you need someone to be there for you. I’m here because I want to be here

• Becoming friends with Cheryl and seeing her true colours too

• “I’m glad i’m not the only one protecting JJ anymore..”

• Seeing Jason everyday after school by the river because it’s where you went on your first date

• Jason talking about running away during the summer, after almost a year of secretly dating

• “Think about it- I can get away from Riverdale, from my family. All of these bad things can just go away.”

• At first being apprehensive about him leaving, but eventually accepting it, ignoring the bad feeling

• Jason inviting you to runaway with him

• “We could get married- and live together, leave Riverdale for good. I know it’s sudden- and you don’t have to, but-”

• Accepting his offer after some thought

• Jason being ecstatic about you accepting his offer, and asking countless times if you were sure

• “I won’t let you runaway alone, I love you too much to let you do that”

• “Thank yo-… you love me?”

• Both of you realizing what you had just said to Jason

• “Don’t worry (Y/N).. I love you too.”

• You, Jason, and Cheryl planning how you were going to runaway that summer

• When the day comes for you to run away, you and Jason both say goodbye to Cheryl

• “I love you like a sister (Y/N), stay safe, and protect JJ for me…”

• You and Jason both getting shot together and dying

• The whole town finding you and Jason’s bodies months later, at the same spot where Jason took you on your first date, at Sweetwater River

• The whole town finding out about you and Jason when they found the bodies with matching rings

• Cheryl disobeying her parents when they said that Jason was to be buried with the rest of the Blossom family, not with (Y/N).

• “It’s what Jason would have wanted! He deserves to be with who he loved!”

• Cheryl secretly having Veronica convince Archie, Betty, and Jughead to help her bury you and Jason together before the memorial

• Everyone agreeing because they didn’t agree with Cheryl’s family, and didn’t want you to be buried away from who you loved because you were friends with all of them

Originally posted by riverdalesource

A/N: Okay so I am terribly sorry if this isn’t what you wanted! I was really stuck on this since we haven’t even heard Jason speak in the show, so it’s really hard to guess what he was like. I assume he had Cheryl’s situation, where he acted a certain way around people at school but in reality was just broken by his home life. In this scenario Polly and Jason weren’t together because it wouldn’t fit, but this is sort of how I imagine Jason was the year leading up to his death. Just a confused, lovestruck boy trying to get away from his problems.