gonna put this on my test

Dogs are the literal best and let me tell you why.

When my parents are out of town, my pup Remmy sleeps downstairs with me. I don’t mind because the basement is chilly sometimes and he’s a fuzzy little space heater. But he always does this weird thing and I didn’t figure out why until last night.

I’m a stomach-sleeper, while the rest of my family are back-sleepers. So Remmy has taken up this very different behavior with me (my family says he doesn’t do it with them). It always takes me a while to settle down, but when I do, Remmy takes his head off of his paws and rests it square in the center of my back.

So I’m thinking, “What’s the point of that? It can’t be comfortable. It cranes his neck in a funny way, and besides, every time I breathe his head goes up and down. That’s a weird thing.” So I formulate a hypothesis, and test it.

Last night, I got comfortable, Remmy put his head on my back, I waited a while, then I held my breath. It took him a while to react, but when he did, he fuckin lost it. He started whining and yipping, and repeatedly licking my face and hands. And I was like oh my god.

Conclusion: my dog noticed that I slept in a way that was different from the rest of my family, thought “that kid is gonna die” and made sure that I never stopped breathing in the middle of the night.

Dogs are fuckin smart as hell. What a wonderful animal.

It has come to my attention that, regrettably, there are certain exotic animal owners who knowingly and willfully try to hide the law and will attack those who share it openly online because they believe that knowledge of the law puts their “community” at risk of being busted.

Well I’ve never been a big fan of online bullies, much less online bullies who try to hide laws. So I’m gonna go ahead and remind all 8,100 of my beloved followers that the rabies vaccine in the USA is proven to work on domestic dogs and cats in clinical trials only. This means if you have an exotic like a raccoon, a fox, or a wolf or wolf hybrid and it bites someone, it can be forcibly removed from your care and destroyed so its head can be sectioned to test for rabies.

The rabies vaccine offers these animals NO legal protection even if it does actually prevent rabies, because the government does not recognize the vaccines efficacy on a legal level. This is the sad truth of the law. It isn’t scientific but it’s there.

This information is important to anyone ever considering adopting, fostering or even temporarily caring for an exotic mammal. Why certain people in these circles wish to keep such potentially fatal information hidden is beyond me.

So, again, I reiterate (just to make them mad) that the rabies vaccine offers no legal protection to an exotic such as a fox, raccoon, wolf or wolfdog if it bites someone. (Wolfdogs are occasionally treated like domestic dogs but dont count on it!)

Lack of knowledge of rabies control law can lead to tragedy for anyone responsible for exotics.

anonymous asked:

Theory: Chloe redemption would be so distinctly ~her~ that as much as she enjoys fighting akumas with LB, a girl just can't leave her hair and nails undone! So Chloe would just be so tired of her appointments being cancelled by akuma attacks. . .

… She just learns to keep quiet so she could actually make it to a manicure because, girl, fighting super villains takes a TOLL, and … Yea …

see that’s the kind of redemption arc i want. chloe becomes a hero, but she is still so completely chloe. i love that idea up there xD

  • like chloe would be a fucking brutal, bad ass superhero and put her heart and soul into the fight but god forbid she breaks a nail 
    • queen bee: *kicking an akuma’s ass* *suddenly stops and screams in horror*
    • ladybug: oh my god, are you okay?
    • queen bee: NO im not okay i just chipped my fucking manicure
  • she always asks the team if they can reschedule patrols that don’t happen during the new episodes of “the bachelor”
    • “i can’t be behind im gonna get spoiled on twitter and i’ll fucking kill someone if that happens”
  • she’ll purposefully get someone really angry and hope they get akumatized so that her test next period will be cancelled
    • marinette keeps trying to explain why she can’t be doing that but chloe doesn’t get it
    • “we learn more about hawkmoth, another civilian is saved, and i have an extra 24 hours to study for math. find me one flaw with this.”
  • she tries to sneakily drop hints to her father that queen bee and volpina should get a statue too
    • “you know. not that i care or anything. just for….symmetry. and accuracy and all that. got some preliminary sketches of the queen bee statue. again. not that i care or anything”
    • “very important to get the nose right daddy don’t mess that up.”
  • post-reveal situation, chloe’s is hands down the best at coming up with believable covers for her teammates 
    • adrien’s taking forever to recharge his kwami and get back to class and the teacher’s wondering where he is
    • chloe: “the poor darling’s been modeling so much lately that he pulled a muscle in his neck after gym classes, really awful business, he was in the nurse’s office during the entire akuma attack, he should be on his way back.”
      • chloe *texting adrien*: there’s a forged nurse’s slip in the boys bathroom, go get it. also, walk in like you have a stiff neck. don’t ask. just do it. 
  • she low-key supports chat’s idea of having a miraculous hide out for the four of them
    • “daddy knows a guy that can make it happen with no questions asked i just need to make the phone call.”
  • she flat out refuses press interviews unless she has a full face of makeup on
    • “queen bee! an interview for the – ”
    • “darlings, i really would, but it’s seven in the morning, i have no concealer on, and there’s no way im appearing on camera. go talk to ladybug.”

luminatinggalaxies  asked:

Since requests are open, do you think you guys can do one with the RFA+V+Saeran and their reactions to MC who is pregnant with their kid/kids? They can find out either from MC telling them or finding out by themselves. Thank you! Side note: I am absolutely in love with your blog, you guys are doing such a great job, I'm pretty sure you guys know this<3 Keep up the good work.

Anon said: for RFA + Saeran + V, they have been trying for a baby for awhile, Mc has wanted to surprise them but they find the pregnancy test first and you can take it from there~


These two were very similar so we kind of mixed them together. Hope you like them!


Zen:

  • You buy one of those mugs that has text written inside at the bottom
  • This one says, “Number #1, Dad!”
  • You fill it coffee one morning and tell him it’s a special mug
  • He thanks you and starts drinking it
  • It’s really hard for you to stay calm…because he’s really drinking it slowly
  • Then all of a sudden he jumps up and says he has to go
  • You look into his cup and literally he has one sip left that’s hiding the message
  • “You sure you don’t want to finish one sip?”
  • “No, thank you though. All the sugar is on the bottom so it’s too sweet. I never finish.”
  • You sigh as he rushes away to get ready
  • You’re trying to think of how to tell him again, when he bursts out of the bathroom and runs back to you
  • It takes him a few minutes to speak, but finally he stammers out
  • “Y-you’re pregnant?!”
  • You stare at the bottom of the cup confused
  • Did he just realize it?
  • He tells you that he saw the pregnancy test on the bathroom counter
  • You facepalm realizing you left it out
  • He’s so ecstatic that he lifts you up and spins you around

Yoosung:

  • He comes home after a really long day at the vet hospital
  • He says he’s so hungry
  • “You mentioned a special dinner earlier, honey,” he smiles while looking at the empty table.
  • You just smile and say you’ll serve it now
  • So he sits down at the dining room table and waits
  • You bring out jars of baby food one by one
  • He’s very confused as you set them all on the table
  • “Is this….some sort of new diet we’re starting?”
  • He doesn’t realize they’re baby food jars until he picks one up and examines it
  • You can see his eyes growing really wide as he picks up each jar
  • To finish off the whole thing, you just smile, “Hold on…I think I have a bun in the oven.”
  • He jumps out of his seat and gives you a huge hug
  • But then he steps back suddenly
  • “Oh no! Did I crush it? I can’t crush our baby…”

Jaehee: Gender Reveal

(She would’ve figured out you were pregnant way too quickly, so we decided to do a gender reveal instead…)

  • You two had spent the last few months debating on whether it was a boy or a girl
  • Jaehee insisted it was probably a boy
  • She said she had a feeling
  • Finally you found out, and decided to do a reveal
  • You place a cake in front of her
  • Jaehee smiles and says, “it’s a boy, isn’t it?”
  • You shrug and say, “Yeah…you were right. What can I say?”
  • You tell her to cut the cake anyway for a picture’s sake
  • But when she cuts it…it’s both blue and pink
  • She looks up at you really surprised, “You’re having twins!”
  • You’ve never heard Jaehee squeal in delight before
  • She keeps hugging you all day

Jumin:

  • You gave him a big scare when one day you nearly passed out and started throwing up
  • He called the doctor right away
  • While you were resting, he pulled the doctor aside and asked if everything was okay
  • The doctor told him that you were just pregnant, so it was a side effect and just to be careful
  • Jumin is very shocked…but he was also worried about you
  • In the midst of you recovering and him thinking you would tell him when you’re ready, he forgot to mention that he knew
  • A week later, you brought out a wine bottle for dinner
  • He assumes you didn’t know you were pregnant yet and gets worried
  • “You really shouldn’t be drinking that in your state.”
  • Your response is a mix of surprise and admonition
  • Finally, you turn the bottle around to reveal the label
  • “Drink this for me. I’ll join you soon. Baby Han coming in April.”
  • He just hugs you softly, apologizing for finding out first
  • But you both are too happy to care
  • Bonus: He also suspected when Elizabeth had been very clingy to you lately

Seven:

  • You had insisted that he go for a drive since he’d been working a lot lately
  • He did, and he got some coffee on the way
  • It hits him and he really has to use the bathroom, so he rushes back home earlier than you expected
  • When he walks in the door, you’re…in a crop top
  • You never wear crop tops, so it’s strange for him
  • Besides that, your back is turned and you seem to be writing something on your stomach
  • The whole situation is strange, but his bladder is about to burst so he just brushes it off and runs into the bathroom
  • He was looking for soap under the sink when he saw the pregnancy test
  • He couldn’t contain his excitement and rushed out to you
  • Before he could say anything, you had turned around
  • You were midway drawing a loading bar onto your stomach, so all it read was “Load”
  • By the way he was crying a little, you knew he already saw
  • He just wraps you in a hug and bends down to kiss your stomach
  • Only the sharpie was still fresh and he got some on his face

Saeran:

  • It had taken him awhile to warm up to the idea of having kids
  • So, when you found out you were pregnant, you wanted to announce it in a special way
  • You replaced all the clothes in his closet with baby clothes
  • But he didn’t get it
  • You weren’t home when he opened his closet
  • He saw the clothes and thought it was a prank from Saeyoung
  • Despite his brother insisting he didn’t do it, Saeran grabs the nearest pillows and starts beating him down for it
  • You return home and find the two in a brawl, and you ask what in the world happened
  • He glares at Saeyoung, “Someone pulled a childish prank on me.”
  • He pauses, realizing what he said, “NO I didn’t mean that.”
  • But it’s too late and you and Saeyoung are giggling
  • You manage to calm yourself and tell him that it was you
  • At first, he’s confused, but then he realizes
  • He makes you do like five more pregnancy test just to make sure
  • You’re a little worried because he’s silent for a long time
  • But then he quietly confesses that he’s so happy and pulls you into his arms
  • While you’re hugging, he just mumbles, “You’re gonna put my clothes back though, right?”

V:

  • You two had been trying for kids for awhile, but nothing came up
  • So when the pregnancy test finally came positive, you were in shock
  • Your first instinct was to tell him right away, but you wanted to do something special
  • So you tell him casually that you haven’t had a couple’s photoshoot in awhile
  • He agrees and you two plan it
  • During one shot, you tell him to turn his back while you hold a chalkboard
  • He thinks it’s an inspirational quote or something so he goes along with it
  • On the board, you had written, “You’re going to be a dad!”
  • He goes to check how the photo came out and you can see his eyes light up
  • A few tears slip from his eyes as he stumbles towards you
  • He hugs you tightly and just says how thankful he is for you…and the baby
  • You can’t help but cry with him

Check out our other headcanons~ Masterlist

BEEP BEEP BEEP! you’ve already hit your alarm clock four times this morning - that’s 20 minutes….which means it’s time to wake up - time to leave for school?! oh ship, you’ve only got 10 minutes to get ready! but don’t worry, I’m here to get you through the morning ♡ listen to me and stay calm

for real, get out of bed. now.

don’t just stay snuggled up in your blankets - actually get out of bed! there’s a ton of stuff to do and so little time to get it done~

pack your bag the night before

the last thing you want to do after waking up late is taking time out of your morning to pack your bag. just do it right before you go to sleep. that way, you’ll have everything ready to go before you even wake up.

also prepare your clothes early

i don’t know about you, but i usually plan a week of outfits on sunday. it’s usually a v loose plan like: “oh, this week it’s gonna be colder than usual, so i’m gonna keep my dark jeans here, a cardigan here, and my long sleeved shirt here”. after that, i’ll pick out what i’m going to wear the night before since it’s easier and i’m less indecisive.

be-you-tiful

if you wear makeup, keep it to a minimum/no-makeup-makeup look. that is, stick to the tried and tested sunscreen/bb cream, mascara, and lipstick/gloss/tint. if you don’t wear makeup, don’t worry about it! (neither do i keke).

know your knots

whenever i’m in a rush but want to seem put together, i opt for the classic pony tail or bun. you could also go for a topknot, side braid, the works - they’re staples - you just can’t go wrong.

eat on the go

i know it may not be ideal for some people, but eating in the car really saves a lot of time. i’m probably the only one here who actually takes her bowl of cereal into the car with her, but it’s totally doable. or, maybe just grab a cereal bar. but please, please, please, do not skip breaky!

route right

if you’re running late to an event and you’re not familiar with how to get there, use your phone (google maps is a lifesaver, fyi) and type in the destination, route the way, and then exit the app. it’ll be there in the morning, either waiting for you to begin navigation, or under the ‘recent’ locations.

go get ‘em, tiger

get out there and carpe diem! run to class if you have to! skip the elevator and take the stairs to get to your workplace faster (unless it’s on the 72th floor - in that case, the elevator’s your best bet).

good luck!  so I’ve decided to continue with the “disastrous mornings” theme since it seemed to be a big hit, so here we are~

  • Peter: Mr. Stark?
  • Tony: What?
  • Peter: Where's my super suit?
  • Tony: What?
  • Peter: Where - is - my - super - suit?
  • Tony: I, uh, put it away.
  • [helicopter explodes outside]
  • Peter: *Where*?
  • Tony: *Why* do you *need* to know?
  • Peter: I need it!
  • [Peter rummages through stuff]
  • Tony: Uh-uh! Don't you think about running off doing no daring-do. You've been revising for this test for two months!
  • Peter: The public is in danger!
  • Tony: Your grades are in danger!
  • Peter: You tell me where my suit is, sir! We are talking about the greater good!
  • Tony: 'Greater good?' I am your fath- boss! I'm the greatest *good* you are ever gonna get!

It has come to my attention that, regrettably, there are certain exotic animal owners who knowingly and willfully try to hide the law and will attack those who share it openly online because they believe that knowledge of the law puts their “community” at risk of being busted.

Well I’ve never been a big fan of online bullies, much less online bullies who try to hide laws. So I’m gonna go ahead and remind all 8,100 of my beloved followers that the rabies vaccine in the USA is proven to work on domestic dogs and cats in clinical trials only. This means if you have an exotic like a raccoon, a fox, or a wolf or wolf hybrid and it bites someone, it can be forcibly removed from your care and destroyed so its head can be sectioned to test for rabies.

The rabies vaccine offers these animals NO legal protection even if it does actually prevent rabies, because the government does not recognize the vaccines efficacy on a legal level. This is the sad truth of the law. It isn’t scientific but it’s there.

This information is important to anyone ever considering adopting, fostering or even temporarily caring for an exotic mammal. Why certain people in these circles wish to keep such potentially fatal information hidden is beyond me.

So, again, I reiterate (just to make them mad) that the rabies vaccine offers no legal protection to an exotic such as a fox, raccoon, wolf or wolfdog if it bites someone. (Wolfdogs are occasionally treated like domestic dogs but dont count on it!)

Lack of knowledge of rabies control law can lead to tragedy for anyone responsible for exotics.

I love talking to baby boomers, because I’m a teenager. And apparently teenagers can’t hold a conversation.

I was talking to a neighbor, being all friendly, and she’s a typical conservative, in her fifties and maybe sixties. She kept saying how surprised she was that a teenager could talk in complete sentences.

I’m just humoring her because if she says anything about millennials, I’ll pull out “I’m not a millennial” card because I’m not and it’s hilarious to see them struggle out a response.

And my phone buzzes, so I check it and see I got an email for a PSEO program.

With lightning fast speed, she goes “Ugh, typical teens these days, always on their phones, texting or tweeting or whatever.”

Just to clarify, I had a seven minute conversation with her and just pulled out my phone just to make sure it wasn’t an emergency. I was in the process of putting it back in my pocket when she says this.

I was gonna let that slide, but she FOLLOWS IT UP with “Would it kill you to do something productive?”

Um, nope. I’m done here.

I, passive aggressive as hell, go “Actually, that was an email from a community college, emailing me the times I can go and take the placement test to get into it and get my two year degree by the time I graduate. But yeah, assume that teenagers don’t do anything productive on their phones.”

And then I wait. I stand there and wait.

You expect a sassy exit? Well it’s much better staying when you know they don’t have anything to say in defense.

She’s completely baffled and obviously doesn’t want to continue the conversation. She’s trying to find an argument or maybe a way out of this, and I let her feel the sweet embrace of death by going “It’s certainly more productive than teaching your generation how to use said technology. Have a good evening.”

And that’s when I make my exit. And that’s why you don’t fuck with me.

2

Imagine: 

You and your husband Harry had been trying for a baby for more than a year now. You both were starting to get a bit discouraged, so you decided to take a break from worrying when to have sex to make a baby and just enjoying one another. 

A few weeks after the two of you decided to stop treating sex like a chore, you realized that you missed your period. You tried not to get too excited because this had happened on more than one occasion, but you turned out to not be pregnant. 

However, this time it was different. This time the test showed those two very pink lines meaning that you were pregnant. 

Since Harry had been working on his solo album, you weren’t sure when he would be home for you to tell him, so you decided to drive to the studio and tell him as soon as you could. On the way there, you stopped by to grab some cupcakes for Harry the guys, so that way at first they wouldn’t be too suspicious to your visit. 

When you got to the studio, you went on back and luckily everyone was just chatting away. Harry looked up and smiled when he saw you. 

“Baby, what are you doing here?” He said wrapping his arms around you and giving you a kiss.

“I missed you and I thought I’d sneak in a visit in case you were late again tonight,” you said. “Plus, I brought cupcakes.” 

“Sweet!” All the guys said grabbing the container from you. 

You laughed. “Um, do you mind if we have a chat for a bit?” You asked Harry. 

“Course, hey guys can you enjoy your cupcakes somewhere else for the time being?” Harry asked. 

“As long as you don’t enjoy yourselves in the studio, we don’t need any of that being recorded,” they joked. 

“Get the fuck out of here,” he laughed. 

You giggled and waited for everyone to leave. 

“So, what do we need to talk about?” He asked. 

“Well, I don’t know exactly how to tell you this, but you better work on your Dad jokes because you’ll be needing soon,” you said calmly. 

“Huh?” Harry looked over at you. “That’s what you needed to talk to me about? Dad jokes? Is your Dad coming to visit?” 

“No,” you laughed. “At least I don’t think so. What I mean is that you’re going to need them because you’re gonna be the dad.” 

Harry looked at you. “Wait? What?” 

“I’m pregnant,” you smiled. 

Harry looked at you in complete shock. “Really?” 

“Yes, really. I took a test this morning and it’s positive,” you said. “See,” you smiled showing him the test. 

“Oh my god,” he said still looking at you in disbelief. “Is this really happening right now?” He laughed with tears in his eyes. 

You giggled walking over to him. “Yes, it’s really happening right now.” 

Harry took his hands from his face and put them on your stomach. “We did it. We finally did it. We’re going to have a little baby,” he whispered before pulling up your shirt a bit and planting a kiss right above your belly button. 

iguana’s 2017 4CC recap

That moment when you start talking about yourself in the third person’s point of view #iwentthere

Anyway the past weeks have been full of interesting, beautiful, controversial, what the fuck moments. To put it shortly, all those ingredients consisting the very essence of figure skating. Aren’t you glad you got yourself into this hell beautiful world of art and sport in which people are gracious and well mannered and they totally do not bitch and moan about scores, results, politicking and other nonsense. Right? 

So 4CC was supposed to be the ~test event~ for the Olympic Games and I’m not gonna lie, if the Olympics are going to be remotely similar to this event I’m just gonna give up on life, beliefs, values and I’ll admit everything I’ve believed in has been a beautiful lie. Injuries, PyeongChang jitters, meltdowns, you name it. I spent the ladies event wishing somebody would call the ambulances, doctors, psychologists, ANYTHING to put most of those girls out of their misery. That competition was so damn tough I felt like I hit my own butt against the ice every time I saw them bombing their programs, bombing their bodies, bombing each other, idek. During the men’s event I was screaming my face off when I saw Yuzuru landing a decent quad loop, only to press my face against the floor the moment he doubled and I mean DOUBLED the next quad. Bro. How do you. How do you rotate a quad loop and fart the salchow. How many times does it have to happen. On the other hand Wenjing Sui and Cong Han owned the party and I’ve had their SP on repeat for the last few days. DAMN. Technically perfect, face giving on point, hair flipping also on point, what else would anyone want? And then there was Tessa Virtue and her lolz partner Scott Moir effectively trolling the rest of the field. 

And now here are some of the things I’ve written down DURING the competitions because honestly, nothing can beat whatever shit your brain is spewing when you’re watching the thing versus when you reminisce about it.

Keep reading

Daisy

Author: Mikala
Characters: Dean Winchester x Reader, Sam Winchester
Word Count: 3,800+
Warnings: Probably swearing. I think that’s it, though.
Author’s Note: This is a re-post from my old SPN blog, freshly edited and presented to you on a silver platter! We’re hoping to get back into the swing of running a fic blog, so here’s hoping! Feedback is always appreciated :)

Summary: You find a dog. Shenanigans ensue.

(gif not mine)

Keep reading

“Clever as a Fox”

Art by @cloverdance

 An “Elsewhere University” Short Story, based on @elsewhereuniversity‘s “Elsewhere University”

 Written by M. E. Grimm

xXx

 “It takes a minnow to catch a barracuda, a barracuda to catch a shark.” - Gunther Bachmann, “A Most Wanted Man”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hey, I LOVE the diverse way you draw faces and characters and I was wondering if you have any tips on how you do that? Too often when I practice drawing I get stuck in that "same face" rut and I struggle to branch out. It's hard for me to make it look natural and I usually end up so disheartened that I stop practicing for long amounts of time, which I know is not helping me at all. Again, absolutely love your art style. :)

Oh shucks ! Thank you friend. ‘Same Face TM ‘ is probably the hardest thing to break. Drawing in your comfort zone is relaxing and falling into patterns happens to everyone. I’m gonna tell you tho – it takes a lot of crummy drawings and tests to get into the more natural exploration. You just gotta keep pushing yourself! So here’s a little exercise I tend to do daily ( or every other day ). I give myself a time limit of about 10-15 minutes. I draw a bunch of random shapes 

And then I just take those shapes put faces in them. I don’t let myself think too much because the moment I start to they get harder and harder to draw! So here’s the result of my 10 minute time restraint

Voila! Just a bunch of random faces for kicks. And then you leave it and try it again the next day and so on and so on. I also tend to just look at people and their expressions / face shapes. Just observing can really go a long way for making it click. This is what’s helped me to look at faces and push / exaggerate things in ways that fit. I hope this is sort of helpful anon!

Today is pretty much Christmas, I swear man. 

So my game dev friend Akira (he has the dopest dreadlocks) saw the Polygon video on Nour and heard me mention that I’d like to integrate the Chroma SDK; and because he’s a dope dude, he decides to put me in touch with Razer, who is not only interested in potentially cross-promoting Nour, but also hooked me up with a bunch of hardware to test on. Razer, you guys are the coolest. 

2

* … A͜ curiou̴s ́tu͠rn ́of ev̧e͝n̡ts̛, ͘i͘nde̢ed͠.

after quite a few hours of nearly pulling out my hair to get these pixels to loop smoothly, here’s a gaster for you all.

put two up there because no matter what resolution i have this at, tumblr loves resizing and making the singular image have a blurry edge.

The Aftermath Addendums

03.04.2017

Dear Diary,

OHMYGOD CHAT NOIR NAIR IS BALD!

It seems he had an accident with a bottle of Nair (ooh lala, does that mean my minou is smooth under all that leather?and now I am the proud owner of a hairless Chat! I was trying not to laugh but he looked SO ridiculous- like One-Punch Man cosplaying cat-woman!!! 

Keep reading

Eggsy isn’t meant to be at Hogwarts. 

Well, he is, technically. He did set Dean on fire. With his mind.

But really, that was a tiny accident and shouldn’t have him on a train to the middle of nowhere, while his mum and sister have been Obliviated and left with the remains of Dean’s gang. Eggsy should be there, helping his family get out of that damn house.

But no, he’s fifteen, four years late to start, and on his way to Hogwarts as his alternative to prison time.

Which, very unfair that he would have gone to prison for lighting Dean on fire when Dean had never even faced the consequences of beating his mum.

Other than the consequence of being burnt to death when he hit Eggsy too. That was too quick a death for what he’d been doing to the Unwins since Lee’s death.

“Unwin?” a smooth voice interrupted his thoughts. Eggsy looks over his shoulder, head still leaned up against the train windows, to see a boy (slightly older than him maybe?) staring down at him with a piece of parchment in his hand. “Are you Gary Unwin?”

“Eggsy,” Eggsy corrects, straightening up to size up the newcomer. “What’s it to you?”

The boy (tall, dark hair, dark eyes, fucking fit, so hot) blinks before rubbing his temples and sighing. “Eggsy then. My name is Harry Hart, I’m Head Boy this year. I’ve been tasked to get you sorted out and tested for your time here at Hogwarts.”

“Tested?”

“We need to see what classes to put you in,” Harry explains, “as you would normally be a fifth year, but this will be your first year at Hogwarts.”

“Ya gonna have to put me with the first years,” Eggsy yawns, checking out of the conversation even though Harry was fucking fit. “I don’t know shit about nothing.”

Harry is silent for a moment before sitting across from Eggsy in the otherwise empty compartment. “You’re a Muggleborn then?”

“Don’t even know what that means bruv.”

“Your parents don’t have magic,” Harry clarifies. Eggsy shrugs.

“Don’t know about my dad, he’s been dead forever. Mum definitely doesn’t though.”

“Muggleborn or half-blood,” Harry notes, scribbling the words onto the parchment he’d been carrying. “Do you know anything about Hogwarts?”

“I read a few things,” Eggsy says nonchalantly. “Know I don’t wanna be stuck in Slytherin.”

I’m a Slytherin,” Harry says. Eggsy smirks as he turns to him. 

“Exhibit A then.”

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anonymous asked:

GUESS WHAT?? My new GM contacted corporate to get us private bathrooms. We will have locks put on our bathrooms and they will no longer be subject to activities involving anal lube, meth, beer, poop explosions, pregnancy tests, ect. It's gonna be great.

gabrielle87fan  asked:

Hello. Could you do a one shot where Starfire is giving birth to Mar'i and one where Starfire tells Nightwing and the others that she is pregnant.

Mm… we’ll do a bit of a two-in-one with this. And I’m gonna do it in a bit of a different style.

Here comes first person POV.

Sorry that it’s crap. Idk if I’m having an off night or if it’s bc I’ve never done POV before.

Oh and I know it’s only this one I’ve done tonight but I’ll do more tomorrow.


Daddy

Looking at her right now, I felt like a bit of a bastard.

Technically, I had been the one to put her through all of this.

Starfire had been a complete trooper the whole way through but today was testing her. But, then again, today was the day after all.

I stood there, brushing my fingers through her damp locks of hair. I was trying to be as supportive and comforting as I could but I felt like I wasn’t really making much of a difference.

Swallowing the mountain in my throat, I gave her upper arm a gentle rub. I would have let her grab onto my hand but she refused, telling me that despite the pain she was in, she didn’t need me having a broken hand.

I felt helpless as I watched my beautiful wife. Her skin was glistening with sweat, her cheeks were red and she looked exhausted already even though she had only started pushing recently. There were tears mingling with the sheen of sweat soaking her golden skin.

She was in so much pain and there was absolutely nothing I could do to relieve her of that pain. Gritted teeth and heavy breathing had become the norm for today, so it seemed.

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Chasing Cars

i.e. Jimin and his girlfriend have some über angsty moments in Hawaii

Jimin x Reader

Word Count: 8472 (haha at least it’s not as long as Tae’s) whoops, did I just make a double entendre???

Genre: Angst, angst, some more angst, haha whoops my hand slipped (more angst), and of course, to top it all off, a dash of fluff! (’cause who would I be if I didn’t put in some fluff???)

A/N: Ohhh boiiii. Someone stop me, my hands just can’t seem to stop typing? So, to those of you who were wondering about poor Park Chim Chim’s girlfriend in Walking on air (which you can read here), here we are! The third installment to my BTS Drabble series! (You don’t have to read the others to know what’s going on.) Buckle up ‘cause it’s gonna be a bumpy ride!

Song: Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol (love this song)


There as no easy way to take the new information that the pregnancy test was providing right in the palms of your hands. You had begun to suspect that you might be pregnant a few days ago when your period still hadn’t come after about a week after you usually started. No blood. No cramps. Nothing. So after waiting a while with nothing to even remotely console you, you decided you’d check to confirm, only to find that your results were very positive.

Tragically, this wouldn’t be the first time you’d conceived in your time with Jimin, but the last time you had miscarried within the first month.

You’d never told Jimin. You weren’t sure you ever would.

You didn’t want anything to even remotely affect Jimin’s career. He was in the prime of his life, at the mature age of 26, going on 27. BTS were still going strong despite all of the new, and old competition in the industry, and you just didn’t want to trouble Jimin further. He had so much on his plate to deal with already.

Soft knocks came from the bathroom door, and you were brought out of your reverie by Jimin’s inquiring voice. . “Y/N, are you alright? You’ve been in there for a while…”

“Umm… yeah. I’ll be out in a second.”

You heard Jimin shuffle away from the door, and away from your unsettled breaths as you looked once more at the positive results on the pregnancy strip before tearing off several sheets of toilet paper and wrapping the evidence up tightly. You decided you would discard of it later somewhere Jimin would never find it, and flushed the toilet.  

Stuffing the test in the waistband of your jeans, you walked back out to your bedroom where you found Jimin packing for the trip to Hawaii. He turned to you at the sound of the bathroom door opening, and smiled.

“Jagi~” He cooed as he walked over and pulled you in for a long hug. “Is everything alright? You look exhausted. Are you sure you’re up for this trip?”

He pulled away to look at you. “Pssh. Of course! I’m not going to miss out on a chance to go to Hawaii! Who do you think I am?”

He rolled his eyes. “You’re Y/F/N, the most wonderful girlfriend in the entire world. How could I possibly forget?” Jimin pecked your lips with his impossibly plush, soft ones, and though it was only for a moment, you melted into his warm touch.

“How did I get so lucky, huh?” He pressed his forehead against yours, gazing into your eyes. “We should finish packing up. The van will be here in less than two hours.”

You scoffed at him. “We? You’re the one who put off packing until the last minute! Don’t bring me into this, it’s not my responsibility.” You poked Jimin in the side, and he yelped in surprise.

“Yah! What’d you do that for?”

You turned away, heading out of the bedroom to throw away your pregnancy test before yelling back. “For being lazy!”

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