gonna go get drunk now

ducky’s drunken shenanigans:

  • here in the netherlands everyone tends to want to mind their own bees wax but i was so obviously drunk that this nice lady in the train couldn’t help but keep looking back at me to see if i was okay and she kept suggesting things to me so that i could feel better. like she suggested i walk a little but i was like “no thanks, i’d fall over. hey did you know i’m drunk” and she was like “yeah i’ve noticed lol” and when we started to leave she wished me a good night’s rest
  • we somehow still ended up at the bar where i met another lady. i pointed my finger at her for a good minute before informing her that i’m drunk. she pulled my finger and said “yes, i can see that”
  • another lady at the bar inquired if i was okay as i stumbled out the toilet
  • the bartender told me that was the last glass of wine and said some words that i did not comprehend, but in hindsight i think she cut me off which is good thanks for lookin out for me
  • had my friend call my grandma because at least i was sober enough to realize i was too drunk sounding to interact with her. (she’s so christian and does not know i drink more than wine) i did yell some things at the phone sometimes, but i think i pulled it off. i think i sounded normal
  • when i’m drunk i’m apparently lowkey four drink amy and i felt a little horny suddenly?? anyway today marks the first time i’ve ever used tinder. now that i’m sober i don’t think i really want to do anything w/ it but dang it felt gud to swipe at good looking fellas and then get a notification that they swiped right at you as well. oh and like nine dudes messaged me
  • i was teasing that i wanted “fun” and one dude suggested a friends with benefits arrangement while another dude wanted to meet up and internally i was like Alaarrrrmm!!!! and i told them that yeah i wanted d but i wanted to sleep the drunk away more so i was like bye lol
  • a lot of drunk tweets were made like this one i was so ready to sleep on the stairs for the entire night
  • anyway did a lot of dancing last night, at the concert, and again at the bar. literally every song was a song i wanted to dance to. i whoo hood so many times during the concert. that’s so weird! i don’t whoo hoo. that’s like captain holt whoo hoo ing. but i whoo hood all my sorrows away and it felt good.
  • i had a fun time, i danced w/out feeling embarrassed. i stumbled through the city clutching on to my friend a Huge Drunken Mess™ but i wasn’t embarrassed. (in fact, i spent the majority of the night being convinced that no, i wasn’t drunk. i only had seven drinks. who gets drunk after seven drinks? anyway now i realize it might have been eleven instead)
  • it’s just really refreshing to not be crippled by my social anxiety for once wow


I dragged Jasper along today for company despite her non-familiarity with…just about anything more nerdy than “sure, I’ve seen Star Wars,” and she had a really good time too. I’ll put up some of the pictures later this weekend, but I wanted to share this first.

Thanks to gerundsandcoffee‘s bravery yesterday, I was able to work up my own courage to ask a question at the Bioware panel today (Greg Ellis, Jennifer Hale, & Steve Blum again). I thanked them for coming and for voicing characters that pretty much got me through optometry school and into my residency, and then I asked about the difficulty of voicing very emotional scenes in a tiny artificial booth with a microphone, if the environment and isolation made it harder or easier. I think I specifically brought up the end of Mass Effect 3 and Jennifer Hale’s work on the Citadel as an example because it still wrenches me apart every time, no matter how often I play it.

She said pretty much what I expected for people in that job, which was that when you’re voice-acting you have to create the environment and the situation inside you and then bring that out yourself, into your voice, completely forgetting about the environment. And then she specifically mentioned the goodbye scene with Garrus! Apparently for a lot of the Bioware stuff, you’re also on a Skype call with that scene’s director while you’re in the booth, so they can give direction between lines and hear how it’s going take by take.

She said when she was doing that scene, she actually found herself getting almost too emotional. She opened her mouth to do the first line and discovered she had a huge lump in her throat, and she had to stop for a moment to compose herself and kind of rein it back in because it was too much Jennifer and not enough Shepard. (“Shepard doesn’t cry! Shepard doesn’t cry!”)

Then she said once she finally got through it, there was just…silence. No comment from the director. And she went, “Caroline?” to no answer, and then a few moments later, “Caroline?” and then the director (whom Jennifer mimicked with this very high-pitched tight emotional voice) said, “Just–give me a second.” And then Jennifer punched the air and said “Yes!” because that’s apparently the sentimental destruction one aims to wreak in scenes like these.

Anyway. It was adorable. And when we got the autograph I was embarrassingly star-struck, but because Jasper is a normal person and not a nerd she told her about how she knew nothing about the games or conventions or “nerd things”, but she was really excited to hear her on the panel because she recognized her voice so well from listening to me play through the games. And Jennifer cooed at Jasper’s seven-month-old because it reminded her of her own son, and they talked about mother things and it was adorable and I got my signature and just, what a good. WHAT. A. GOOD.


Regina Spektor- Samson. 

“You are my sweetest downfall. I loved you first.”