gomen this is sloppy

27. “I’m pregnant.”

When he wakes up the next morning, he’s fully at ease for a moment or two, wrapped up in the soft sheets that hold an unusual yet so comforting scent that he wants to do nothing more than to just stay there for the rest of his life.

Of course, reality eventually hits Levi when he realizes that this isn’t his bed.

The first thing that gives it away is the fact that his head is propped up on two pillows. Everybody knows that just one pillow is optimal, and in fact, Levi doesn’t even own any more than just one. The second thing, which ultimately causes him to crack his eyes open, is the faint sound of something that resembles vomiting carrying over from the bathroom.

The thought of someone throwing up in his bathroom is rather disconcerting, so of course he staggers up, only to discover that this isn’t his room, either. By extension, the bathroom where someone’s currently blowing chunks doesn’t belong to him either, which makes the whole situation a little better, he supposes.

On second thought, maybe not, because now as he blinks away the last few traces of sleep, he realizes that this is Eren’s room. And by that logic, the person vomiting in the bathroom must be Eren.

Very slowly, last night’s events return to him. They’d downed a few drinks and played some video games, nothing too unusual, but at some point it all becomes a blur, no matter how much Levi tries to strain his memory.

What he does remember is bare tanned skin thrumming under his fingertips and lidded emerald eyes staring him down and drawing him in deeper, and holy hell, he’d fucked Eren last night, hadn’t he?

Yes. Yes, he had.

The details aren’t all that clear to him, but he distinctly recalls having Eren cling on to him, nails digging into his shoulders and his body responding to Levi’s every touch so beautifully, as if he was made for Levi to hold and play with. It’s a shame that he doesn’t remember that much since he’s spent a good few nights pining after Eren and imagining what he might look like when coming undone.

Fantasies aside, now that he’s actually done the unthinkable with his roommate, he’ll probably have to deal with the aftermath. His limbs feel so heavy as he stumbles up from the bed and retrieves his clothes from where they’re scattered around the floor, taking an excessively long time dressing himself. Each second that he spends fiddling with his zipper means more time before he’ll have to knock on that bathroom door and face the consequences.

Feeling nervous is fucking stupid, Levi tries to tell himself. They’d shared an apartment for, what, almost a year now? How much could one drunken hookup really change?

Okay, to be fair, it’s not really just last night that has him so antsy. It’s the fact that Eren’s been consistently occupying his thoughts for the last year or so and it’s gotten to the point where it’s kinda hard to function whenever he happens to be in the same room with Levi because his damn puppy dog eyes and blindingly bright smile make Levi trip over his words like a teenager.

Luckily there’s a sturdy bathroom door between them now or Levi’s sure he’d be unable to form any words. “Hey. Eren,” he calls out as he knocks on the door and receives a faint gurling noise in response.

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Eren eventually mumbles. “I feel awful.”

“Yeah,” Levi agrees, though he’s not sure if it’s the same kind of awful they’re feeling. He has to clear his throat a few times before he gets out the next words, and even then they sound a bit feeble. “Are you coming out? We need to talk.”

Eren gives a dry laugh. “Coming out. Get it?” There’s a moment of silence during which Levi stares blankly at the wooden surface. “It’s a gay joke. Which I probably am right now. Gay, that is.”

“Okay, yeah,” Levi starts off. As someone who’s been through that initial panic years ago, he can’t exactly claim to relate to Eren. “Do you think you’ll be done throwing up soon?”

“I don’t know, I feel really queasy.” Maybe he’s just imagining it, but he thinks he hears Eren give a faint sniffle. “What if…” There’s a heavy pause and he can all but feel the hysteria emanating from the other side of the door. “I’m pregnant. Fuck, did we use a condom?”

Out of all the things he would’ve expected to hear, that is probably the dumbest one. “First of all, it doesn’t happen that quickly,” Levi sighs as he leains his forehead on to the door. His crush is an idiot. A lovable idiot at that, but still an idiot. “Second, I think we did. There’s about five used ones laying around on the floor. I counted.”

“Five?” Eren echoes, voice rising just a bit. “No wonder I can barely walk.”

“Third, and I can’t believe I’m the one who has to break this to you,” Levi goes on, ignoring the interruption, “it doesn’t work that way when you have two dicks. Our genitals are incompatible in that sense. You’re just hungover.”

“Well, they were compatiblating just fine last night, don’t you think?” Eren states in an almost mocking tone. Judging by the sounds, he’s moved to rinse off his mouth.

“That’s not even a word,” Levi points out, the tension in his shoulders easing just slightly.

You’re not a word,” comes the genius rebuttal, and now Levi manages to even crack a smile. At least Eren’s still being his usual self.

They’re both quiet for a while, perhaps waiting for something. Eventually it’s Levi who breaks the silence.

“Do you hate me now?” he asks, not sure if he wants to know the answer.

Eren gives a sigh, and it sounds like he’s standing right by the door as well, maybe even leaning against it in a similar position. “I could never hate you,” he replies with just a touch of uncertainty in his voice. “I just… have no idea what to do.”

“How about you come out first?” Levi suggests, surprising even himself with how calm he sounds. “We’ll work it out. Together. If you want to, that is.”

“I do want,” Eren replies earnestly. “God, do I ever.”

“Come out then. It’s fine.” His hand curls over the doorhandle, holding on for support. “It’s just me.”

The sound of the lock snapping open from the inside echoes through the messy room, and while it’s only the beginning, Levi thinks that they’ll be alright.

((send me a thing and ill write the ereris man))

7

me and a certain yaranaikabot were on skype talking about shovel knight and she mentions that the first meeting between shovs and black made her think of that faker scene with sonic and shadow so i edited the thing and

it kinda seems like fucking believeable in-game dialogue fucking shit fuck this game fuck these guys i’m out