I literally cannot even believe this show just pulled a Madoka on me. Let’s see if I’ve got this straight.
- Last year at the GPF, Yuuri spectacularly bombs out and ends up in sixth place. Victor takes the gold.
- Yuuri cries in the bathroom, meets Yurio.
- On the way out of the Sochi rink, Yuuri and Victor pass each other and Yuuri stares a little too long. Victor, not recognizing him off the ice and mistaking him for a fan, offers to take a photo with him.
- Yuuri instead walks away, probably wanting to go crawl in a hole and die somewhere.
- Celestino drags Yuuri out to the banquet, probably to try to keep him from stewing in depression.
- Yuuri gets absolutely shit plastered, ties his tie around his head in true Japanese salary man style, and challenges Yurio to a dance off.
- He gets even more shit plastered while dancing and latches on to Victor like a barnacle, possibly challenges HIM to a dance off, invites him to their family hot springs and asks Victor to be his coach in a moment of drunken courage.
- Victor is taken with this adorable drunk Japanese man and ends up dancing the tango with him.
- Yuuri is not done getting shit plastered and then gets into a pole dancing contest with Chris (at the point he and Victor are dancing, his clothes are still on).
- The next morning Yuuri remembers none of this. He gets depressed over the GPF, gains some weight, leaves Detroit to go back to Japan.
- Victor has been maybe thinking about the adorable Yuuri who swept him off his feet at the banquet and made him blush and MAYBE HE IS PINING??
- Yuuri skates “Stay Close to Me” and the video goes viral.
- Victor sees it, realizes holy shit that’s the guy and he’s skating my love song, to hell with this I am going to Japan to go get him.
- Shows up fully expecting Yuuri to be DTF because of what happened the last time they met only to have Yuuri go all blushy and shy and seem like he doesn’t remember.
- Victor is JUST AS CONFUSED AS YUURI.
- Yuuri is accidentally the Casanova in this story and doesn’t even know it.
I have to rewatch the WHOLE SHOW with this new information in mind holy shit.
Drunk Female Captain: I stand on the table in the bar [full of drunk sailors] and yell out “If you seadogs can gather enough gold, I’ll take my shirt off!”
DM: “You take 3 nonlethal damage from being pelted by money. It’s a lot of gold.”
Captain: “Haha! That’s what I’m talking about!”
First Mate: “Sir, perhaps you should put your shirt back on now?”
Captain: “Nah, the men paid for this, I’ll let them enjoy themselves a bit longer. Besides. If you think I’m ever gonna get that shirt back, you don’t understand horny sailors.”
Bartender: “Yeah, a sailor ran off with it a while ago.”
Captain: “See? Now, who here wants to buy me a drink!”
DM: Three people raise their hands instantly.
First mate: “You’re milking this.”
Captain: “You can bet your ass I am.”
obviously “I take the gold” “alright then, I take some chairs” is a great bit, but the scene immediately preceding it where Travis tries to open the lock box with a check against every single stat as Griffin sarcastically narrates what’s happening to Magnus is equally great imo. “I make a constitution check!” “you and the box both drink poison and the box dies”