going to sleep alone

true hope is trying to start up v3 despite knowing perfectly well that you’ll just get the “not yet available” pop-up

We all have that one person we’d stay up late for. Only them. Why? Because they’re the only person who can make you smile through a text. The only person who gives you genuine butterflies. The only person you’d lose sleep for.
—  And now you’re gone

Elves don’t need to sleep, but the twins like to sleep. It’s a fairly new development, in the scope of their years. The concept of sleep had never been a part of their childhood. Back then, sleep was for other people.

Because sleep was a liability on the road. Not sleeping gave them an advantage in the caravans, made them more useful; up before the dawn to make breakfast, working late into the first watch to finish the cleanup from dinner, they were an asset to whatever group they chose to travel with. They made certain of that.

Nights for the twins meant one sibling meditating for a couple of hours pressed up against the other while they kept watch, unwilling to trust anyone but each other to keep away the dangers of the world, because traveling with other folks meant certain opportunities, but also risk. They’d learned quickly that danger could just as easily come from within the group as from without, and young elves off their guard could be easily taken advantage of. After two or three hours, they’d switch, and then they’d get up to stoke the cooking fires and the day would start again.

Even as they got older and more world-wise and could afford the occasional night in an inn with a real door and a decent lock, they still kept their watch.  The world was unpredictable and innkeepers carried spare keys and if someone noticed their jewelry had gone missing while they were drunk the night before, well, the option of a quick escape was never a bad thing. 

University is where things begin to change. Two wildly different class schedules mean their meditation schedules rarely match up anymore. They’re each working their way to the top of their respective schools of magic and onto the crew of the most prestigious mission the world has ever conceived of, and the twins don’t need to steal to make ends meet anymore, but old habits are hard to break and they have a reputation of mischief to honor, okay. Their prank wars are the shenanigans of legend. There’s so much to do, in this world of academia they’ve found themselves in–they push themselves to the limit, egged on by one another and their peers, and it’s not unusual to skip their meditation altogether in the interest of more productive activities, not unusual for one to be shaken away by the other at the end of a week-long binge of activity that led them into a full-on crash. 

Sleep feels like a clandestine thing, indulgent and heady. It’s nice, but they have no time for it, until suddenly the world ends and they do.

The longer they spend on the Starblaster, the more actual sleeping they seem to do. They’re the only elves on a ship with five other people who need a good seven or eight hours a night of rest, and while some nights it’s nice to be up and about while everyone else is dead to the world, they find it’s equally nice to spend nights curled up and comfortable, to be able to turn off the world for a while. 

There are drawbacks. Dreams are strange things, uncontrollable visions that are sometimes benevolent and sometimes very much not. They discover that is they try to sleep alone things have a tendency to go poorly. Fortunately, as time goes on the twins learn to trust the other members of their crew, at their backs and in their beds. 

Sleep is both a novelty and a luxury. Because it isn’t something they have to do, it’s something they’ve earned. Sleeping says hey look fuck you and fucking look at us, because we made it, we have a family, we have a home. Sleep is a triumphant shout into the night. Sleep feels like victory, waking up lazy feels like riches. 

And if it becomes a habit, well, the twins never were elves of moderation. 

the inner virgo torment word: should
you should have done this differently, you should have done that this way

the inner pisces torment words: do you remember? 
immediately startles them and switches their mind off

the inner capricorn torment words: you’ll fail
you’ll fail so don’t even try it echoes, you’ll fail so why bother? you’ve failed at everything

the inner taurus torment words: but it could change
yes you have a job and money and a house now but it could change and then what are you going to do?

the inner leo torment words: nobody will ever love you 
everybody can see your faults, when they get to know you you’ll see, nobody will ever love you

the inner libra torment words: alone forever
you’re going to do this alone forever, you’re going to sleep alone forever, and so on

anonymous asked:

oh man oh man oh man that headcannon of andrew sleeping on neil melted my heart, pleeeeease give me andrew randomly draping himself over neil (cause that boy doesn't gaf) at random intervals and people, foxes or otherwise, just having a meltdown cause! cute!! whattt?!?

This works so well with an idea I already have and I am excited. Okay, so:

  • Andrew and Neil get a lot more comfortable with the whole Andrew sleeping on Neil thing before there’s any chance of anything like it happening around other people
  • And even when it does, Andrew does it to be an asshole
  • He does it in front of Kevin first
  • (Which, side note, connects to the hc I have that when Andrew and Neil become more comfortable with touch around each other, they eventually start doing little subtle things when they are with just Kevin, but never anything beyond holding hands)
  • (Because they are around Kevin a lot and Kevin does not care and will just keep on talking about exy or doing whatever he was already doing like nothing odd has happened)
  • So, late Friday night Aaron randomly shows up at their dorm for something that both twins seem to think is pretty important
  • But Nicky, Kevin, and Neil have no fucking clue what it is
  • And Andrew disappears with Aaron without an explanation before any of them can ask
  • Andrew comes back again early in the morning
  • He looks like absolute shit and he clearly hasn’t slept
  • But he doesn’t say anything about where he went with Aaron
  • He completely ignores questions about what the hell happened
  • When Nicky tries to ask again, Andrew deflects by asking if Kevin is ready to go
  • Because Andrew has already reluctantly agreed to take Kevin to Exites on Saturday morning and he knows he will not hear the end of it if he doesn’t
  • Plus, he’s not really in the mood to stick around and have them ask him questions for the rest of the day
  • And Neil can’t just take Kevin to Exites because Kevin still gets nervous without Andrew around
  • (Also, side note, Aaron is no more helpful when asked by anyone about what the hell Andrew had to go help him with for five hours in the middle of the night)
  • (And Andrew never fucking says a word about it and pretends it never happened because he doesn’t care about talking about it and he doesn’t need to amplify the looks and comments he’s already getting from Neil for dropping everything to help Aaron in the middle of the night)
  • Anyways, back to the thing I’m supposed to be writing
  • So, Kevin is already ready and has been waiting nervously for Andrew’s return
  • Neil goes too because he likes Exites and he likes Andrew
  • Plus, Andrew operating on no sleep and going on a long trip alone with Kevin where the main focus is exy sounds like a terrible fucking idea

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GOT7 - You sneaking in their bed at night.

Request:  Hello 💕💕 ( I hope you are well btw 😍😍😘😘) can I request a got7 reaction to you sneaking in their bed at night because you had a bad dream?? Thank you love 💕💕💗💗😘😘  


He felt someone lying on the bed next to him, he turned around and saw you. “Hey … what are you doing here?” “I had a nightmare, can I stay?” “Of course you can.” He smiled. He was dying inside, he was in love with you, sleeping with you was a dream. “Thank you, Jae.” “Anything for you.” He smiled shy.


He wouldn’t mind too much, he’d be too sleepy. “Hmm, can I sleep with you?” You said, already lying down. “Of course.” He said and gave a little smile. When you woke up, he was holding you close to him.


You were dating, but no one knew. It was a secret. You were sleeping in the dorm with the boys, but you were in the guest room. In the middle of the night, you decided to go to bed with Mark because you couldn’t sleep alone. “Hey ….” He said when he saw you. “Hi. Can I sleep here with you?” “Yes! Of course you can, my love.”


He would be so happy. “Jackson … I had a nightmare. Can I sleep with you?” “Yes, please. Lie down here, I’ll make you sleep.” You lay down next to him and he hugged you. “You know … My bed is pretty big, you can come sleep here whenever you want.” “Oh, really? I’ll always come to sleep with you.” You laughed. “Feel free.” He smiled and kissed your cheek.


“Hey …” You woke him up. “Hey, is everything okay?” He said sleepy. “I had a nightmare and I can’t sleep …” “Come here with me.Let’s sleep together.” He smiled. “But what if the boys ..” “No! They will not mind. Don’t worry.” He smiled and pulled you into bed with him.


You went to his bed and slept instantly without saying anything. In the morning, when you woke up, he was looking at you. “Good Morning.” He laughed. “May I ask when you came here?” “Well … I had a nightmare and I couldn’t sleep. So I came to sleep with you, sorry.” “No need to apologize.Why didn’t you wake me up? I could cuddle you.” He laughed. “Oh, stop!”


You woke him up, and he was worry instantly. “Are you okay? What happened?” “Nothing … Can I sleep here?” “Of course, baby.” He hugged you. “Is really everthing fine?” “Yeah … I just had a bad dream.” “Okay, wake me up if you need anything.” “Okay.”

requests are closed!

i could be good with you

Summary: Cuddling up to Otabek has always been easy and normal for Yuri. So when Otabek starts avoiding him, it hurts a lot more than he expects. (2nd place giveaway prize for @some-sort-of-firefly !! Prompt: confessions and first kisses. otayuri. word count: 1237)

They’ve always been comfortable with being close together physically. That’s how it’s been, and that’s how it always will be.

At first, it was never the way Viktor and Yuuri are always draped over each other in public – god, Yuri would rather never step foot on the ice again than be anything like those two – but it’s more of the subtle things, such as Yuri wrapping his arms around Otabek during motorcycle rides, or Otabek’s hand gently holding the small of Yuri’s back as he leads them through the streets.

Then it started becoming, well, less subtle. Such as the multiple times Yuri has tackles Otabek in a hug after a long period of time without seeing each other, Otabek playing with Yuri’s hair and braiding it to different styles, and falling asleep together on the same bed, arms wrapped around each other.

For Yuri, it’s something natural, comforting. Nothing calms him down more than Otabek’s touch, warm and steady and easy to focus on when he’s starting to lose his temper. He’s sure that his best naps he’s had have always been with Otabek’s arms around him. Otabek is such a comforting presence that is now hard to live without.

As of late, though, he’s noticed that Otabek has been distancing himself from him, physically. Everything else has been the same, but Otabek no longer plays with his hair or takes his hand, or, well, anything. He’s been conscious with how he moves when he’s around Yuri, and whenever Yuri tries to initiate the contact himself, it only takes a few minutes before Otabek gently moves Yuri’s hands away from him.

It’s… concerning. And lonely, he finds out, when Otabek smiles at him apologetically that night and says he’d rather sleep in his own hotel room for the rest of their time in France for the Grand Prix Finals. He doesn’t get much sleep that night. And when he sees Otabek yawning and rubbing his eyes the next day, he knows he isn’t the only one.

So what gives?

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I couldn’t sleep last night because I know that it’s over between us. I’m not bitter anymore, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I’ll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent a summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love. The best kind of love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. And that’s what you’ve given me. That’s what I’d hoped to give to you forever. I love you. I’ll be seeing you.
—  😔

Physics says: go to sleep. Of course
you’re tired. Every atom in you
has been dancing the shimmy in silver shoes
nonstop from mitosis to now.
Quit tapping your feet. They’ll dance
inside themselves without you. Go to sleep.

Geology says: it will be all right. Slow inch
by inch America is giving itself
to the ocean. Go to sleep. Let darkness
lap at your sides. Give darkness an inch.
You aren’t alone. All of the continents used to be
one body. You aren’t alone. Go to sleep.

Astronomy says: the sun will rise tomorrow,
Zoology says: on rainbow-fish and lithe gazelle,
Psychology says: but first it has to be night, so
Biology says: the body-clocks are stopped all over town
History says: here are the blankets, layer on layer, down and down.


The Sciences Sing a Lullabye

Albert Goldbarth, 1948


Graphic - 36…

It’s 4AM, you can hear the birds singing outside your window, the air smells damp from the rain that’s just passed. You don’t want to go to sleep, you wait up for the sunrise alone. It’s the most euphoric you’ve felt in years.

Starved pt 6

Tag List:  @the-doggie-and-his-cuddlefish @fallingineternity @fangirlfiles1 @cup-of-blue  @reaper8439979 @lastfemaletimelord @zoeyheys @lizzysperil @trilight102@frustratedwaffle @the-diaries-of-a-nerd @vladimeme @prplzorua @anxiousdepressedkid @ alzac-saber @softanon @chaoticgood-anon @321angst @vixenneko@justanotherpurplebutterfly @chemicallyimbalancedromance@hetaisawesome @virgilient @soft-blue-badger @latin-logic @the-sanders-sides  @emovirgil @itmepaigeb @evil-queens-rule @youcancallmeverge@datonerougecookeh @hells-angel-hevens-demon @glaceon-in-a-sweater @here-to-vent @thehomicidalbean @abstractedthinking @watch-me-introvert @alicethemadhatterapprentice  @i-prayed-to-you-cas@cherryblossomrebellion @musicphanpie-b @cochroachkappa-blog@sanative-sanders @you-can-call-me-verge @doctorwhitttaker@getupanddothething @rebbeash @backatthebein @a-blog-just-for-sanders@princeyandanxiety @extremepenguin @a-person-who-exists @sandersfluff@the-laarmy @madd-catter @vixenneko @the-sanders-snides@muchfeelsmanyfandoms @hey-youre-out-of-shampoo @edgy-side-of-me @that-space-gay-writes @chaoticgood-anon @themainecoone @imteamdanosaur @ensnaredyouth27 @a-universe-of-fandoms @fandomsofrandom @beepbeep-jerrythejeep @dont–talk–to–me @campcampislife

Chapter Notes: Fluff. All the fluff. It’s fluff. And more fluff. And sap. Fluff and sap. All of it. The whole thing. 

CW: Fluff. Probably that’s about it. It’s fluffy. 

Thanks: Quick shout out to @thuriweaver for being my sounding board and cheerleader throughout this story. <3 you! 

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4 Part 5

They stayed that way for a good long while, the four of them, curled up somewhat awkwardly on the couch. Virgil would have stayed that way forever, in spite of the fact that his legs were starting to fall asleep under Patton’s weight and it really was getting a little too warm with the combination of their body heat and his hoodie. 

Fortunately for his circulation, Logan eventually drew away, and said, “Okay. That’s enough of this.” 

Virgil felt his heart sinking, especially as Roman also removed his arms and Patton climbed clumsily to his feet. Even though he had been getting physically uncomfortable, their touch had awakened something in him, some needy clawing thing, and it was nowhere near satisfied yet. He had the worrying suspicion it never would be, and then where would he be?

But Patton reached out and pulled him to his feet. “Virgil,” he said, and to Virgil’s amazement he sounded almost shy. “I would really like to give you a real hug now. May I?” 

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Sixth set of ten Sterek fic recs!

hometown | wearethefoxes ( @allyaisbae​ ) | 50,358 | Mature | 2015-03-18 to 2017-08-20

It was Isaac who came first, that summer.

He showed up at Derek’s loft with a backpack hanging on his shoulder and an expression on his face that was at once lost and heartbroken, and Derek didn’t hesitate to step aside and open the door to let him in.


After the events with the Kanima, Derek tries to be a better alpha and Stiles ends up all alone.

i love you a latte [Fic & Podfic] | kellifer_fic ( @kellifer-k ), RsCreighton | 6,692 | Gen | 2017-08-19

“You… want me to come to your family reunion?”


“And you’ll come to my best friend’s wedding as…my… date?” Stiles thinks the whole proposition bears repeating.

“Yes,” Derek says again, brows furrowing like he’s starting to regret asking.

All Coming Back, Like It Was Never Gone | @LadyDrace | 2,756 | Teen | 2017-09-02

Stiles and Derek spend a summer looking for Boyd and Erica. During that summer they’re… something. Something that never becomes much of anything.

But then, years later, it all comes back.

Better Than Milk and Cookies | SylvieW ( @sylvie-w​ ) | 6,879 | Teen | 2016-12-22

Stiles met Derek every Christmas since he was a child. He just doesn’t remember.

a feeling so startling | apollonian ( @pseudoapollonian ), @alphahel | 6,441 | Teen | 2017-06-23

Stiles and Derek,
swimming in the ocean,
causing a commotion,
‘cause they are so awesome.

Alternatively, the one in which everyone is a merperson and Stiles and Derek have a chance encounter.

In the Bright | skoosiepants ( @pantstomatch ) | 1,501 | Gen | 2017-05-25

It’s only later, when Stiles is lying in bed and staring at his ceiling, that he thinks: of course. Of course Derek Hale is pure of heart.


A unicorn thinks Derek deserves nice things.

The Payoff Pitch | Leslie_Knope ( @leslieknopeismyspiritanimal ) | 83,974 | Explicit | 2017-02-08 to 2017-04-11

Derek is on the cusp of his second season with the LA Dodgers, and as the reigning runner-up Rookie of the Year, the pressure’s on him to become the team’s star pitcher and lead them to the playoffs for the first time in five years. He’s trying to deal with the burden of expectations and really has zero desire to spend any extra time or energy on anything that isn’t baseball.

But then he meets Stiles.

Beacon Gills | kitsunequeen ( @stilesbansheequeen ) | 4,226 | Teen | 2017-07-01

“Derek,” Erica singsongs loudly. Rather than knocking on the rather flimsy-looking piece of driftwood, she grabs a coconut filled with seashells and shakes it violently. “We’ve got a surprise for you!”

“I hate surprises,” Derek answers, voice slightly muffled through the door. “Aren’t you supposed to be out exploring the caves with Isaac?”

“He has some special guests tonight,” Boyd says. “And so do you.”

Derek doesn’t answer right away, and Stiles can almost imagine him sighing.

“Come in,” he yields finally. “You know it’s unlocked.”

Erica flings the door open, nudges Stiles inside, and slams it behind him.

“Surprise!” she yells, and then Stiles can hear her and Boyd’s footsteps quickly retreating.

Oh, shit.

When Stiles accompanies Scott on a trip to his uncle’s beach house, he gets more than he bargained for after running into a pack of mermaids with a particularly attractive leader…

Something Other Than Remaining | @kaistrex | 1,253 | Gen | 2017-08-26

“Why didn’t you tell me mates were a thing?”

Stiles watches Derek roll his eyes at Scott’s question as he continues to sift through the debris in what used to be the kitchen of the burnt out Hale house.

“Because you don’t have one,” Derek answers flatly when he realises speaking will get them to leave quicker than silence.

Or the time Scott asked why Derek never told him about mates and Stiles just couldn’t let it go.

Tell Me No More Lies | @TroubleIWant | 4,944 | Teen | 2017-04-15

Derek had sworn to serve the revolution against Queen Katherine knowing full well that the cost of such treason could be dear. He’d thought he was ready to sacrifice anything for freedom… But he wasn’t counting on the sacrifice being his marriage to Stiles.

- OR -

“Can I tempt you to the floor for this dance?” The flirtatious tone rouses him from his dire musings, and Derek turns to see his husband.

“I’m afraid not,” Derek says, gentling his tone to take the sting out of the refusal. Stiles’ smile tightens, almost imperceptibly, and he nods graciously. He’s used enough to such rejection, Derek thinks with a pang. He’s used to lonely dinners as well, and going to sleep alone when Derek has late nights, and listening to vague excuses because the real reasons are ones he cannot know. Derek hates to disappoint him, tonight as ever, but he needs to be available for the other spy to pass him the information, not whirling about on the dance floor. The revolution must come first, until Lady Katherine can be imprisoned for her crimes.

Derek strives to believe that the day will come soon.