okay okay okay I’m so happy right now so many good things are happening. I’m working on m godfather fic for the write a thon (mafia theme guys, they are all in the mafia I’m so pumped), I’m really close to 2.5k followers which is insane, and #bekindtowriters is actually happening and spreading and I couldn’t be more proud that it’s catching on! 

anonymous asked:

mels cher***'s having a workout dvd and simon is godfather and i thesun{.}co{}uk/tvandshowbiz/2943308/new-baby-new-direction-everything-you-need-to-know-about-cheryl-and-her-bump-from-directioners-to-wolverhampton-and-yoga/

Oh hey! Cheryl’s talking to the tabloids again - how fun for her! I mean, I’m not the Melly to say I told you so (I’m exactly that Melly let’s be real) and that this baby was a huge part of her rebrand and would be monetized to within an inch of its smol life, but let Melly lay down the mentionable bits:

B – BRAND: the mum-to-be is said to be spending £1million on rebranding herself and launching a new career, including a post-baby workout DVD and a baby book. She’s also been working on her Cheryl’s Trust charity and its new HQ in Newcastle. A source said: “She sees becoming a mother as the chance to start a new direction. She has a big-money offer on the table to do something along the lines of Cheryl’s New Mum Diary.”

F – FASHION: expect Cheryl’s post-pregnancy style to be as spot-on as ever. Mum and baby brands are clamouring for her to be seen with their items. 

G –  GLOSSY SHOOT: the traditional welcome for any celeb family, all dressed in white and beaming. Experts say the first pictures of the baby would net a  fortune. Top PR agent Sean O’Brien said: “A magazine would be likely to offer around £500,000 for an exclusive contract. That would include the first pictures and a couple of lifestyle shoots during the first year.”

Q – QUIDS IN: this baby could earn a small fortune from magazine deals to babywear ranges. PR agent Sean O’Brien reckons Cheryl could design a High Street clothing range. He said: “An exclusive range would be worth £300,000 to £400,000. Add a magazine deal and you’re looking at £1million in the first year.”

S – SIMON COWELL: he created One Direction and gave Cheryl a career after Girls Aloud as a judge on The X Factor, so surely Simon is in line to be a godfather. 

anonymous asked:

The whole Sun article is one big Cheryl focused Wattpad fanfic. Liam proposing to Cheryl in the delivery room. Simon being the godfather. THE BIG ASS PIC OF HER IN A THONG SHOWING OFF HER ROSE TATTOO. WHYYYYY. It's too much.

they called Liam a toyboy, I just…


@typhoidmeri​ that was a complicated frock we chose to swoon over ;)

maybe she’s like reverse Cinderella or something? Like she’s actually the princess holding the ball, and Steve is the one who gets trussed up. Pierce is the wicked stepfather, I guess. Rumlow as the not-so-ugly stepbrother, and somebody else, that Gilmore Hodge guy from cafta? The fairy godmother is Sam (fairy godfather, falcon godfather, fairy godfalcon??)

”i need you to find me the biggest damn pumpkin you got, a bunch of critters, and a goose who can’t drive”

“a goose who CAN’T drive?”  

“what you telling me you got one who can??”  **

Lucky the dog gets turned into Clint, a raccoon gets turned into Bucky, some mice into horses yada yada, and instead of a goose the driver is a small black spider that Steve presents to his Fairy Godfalcon in an upturned glass with a piece of cardboard underneath. Which turns into Natasha, obvs. Beep beep! 

And whatever else because Darcy should wind up searching high and low, demanding of every young gentleman, “hey gimme your shoe!”

**i’m only slightly sorry about the goose thing, because it is a fantastic in-joke with my friends from when we watched the live action Cinderella and laughed at the bit when the goose gets turned into the driver and says “I can’t drive, I’m a goose.” That movie was way funnier than I think they intended it. 

anonymous asked:

The sun told us everything we need to know about Cheryl and Liam's baby from A to Z - literally. Highlights include "S-Simon is going to be the godfather" and "E- engagement: Liam will propose in the delivery room" two days after Liam's fu to Simon on live television. Amazing! What timing! Also this gem: "U – UNCLE ANDREW TWEEDY: Cheryl’s troubled brother has a history of drink, drugs and violence, and was jailed over an armed robbery in 2011. He is unlikely to be top choice for babysitting"

just reading this makes me feel nauseous