goddamn tea

MODERN MYTHOLOGY: Helen of Troy

she just wants to be normal. hell, she’d give anything for people to stop calling her “the most beautiful woman in the world”. because the word beautiful has started to lose its meaning and people can’t seem to stop finding new ways of telling her how pretty she looks, or how beautiful she is, or how lovely her eyes are. she can’t have a normal conversation without someone complimenting her looks, and she definitively can’t online date because she can’t post a profile picture without being harassed. it’s silly, she knows. but she’s so tired of people only seeing her beauty and not her wits. so from now on, she just wants people to notice her heart, her intellect and her interests. because the word beautiful means nothing. not anymore. 

Cheshire Cats and Elephant Bees: Chapter 8/?

Chat Noir first shows up at her house about two days into summer.

Or: Old friends reconnect. People break and come back together. There’s a fox in the city.

Rating: T/PG-13 | Chapter: 8/? | Pairings: Chloe Bourgeois & Adrien Agreste, Chloe Bourgeois/Volpina, Chloe Bourgeois & Chat Noir | redemption arc

Ok so here’s the thing. This was a difficult chapter to write, especially in the midst of all this “Queen Bee” stuff going on. I needed to make Chloe’s inherent problems very very clear, because there needed to be some sort of catalyst for everything that comes afterwards. That being said, it’s a very complicated issue, hence why this entire fic is from her point of view in the first place. Chloe’s still really broken up about the entire Acapulco thing, more than she even realizes, and she’s developed very unrealistic standards she expects other people to meet as an attempt to try and keep herself safe.

But, also, you’re going to get why this needed to happen, why I even introduced Nicola as a character in the first place, and you’re going to see all the ways this changes things so like. Just bear with me, okay. 

And also I sincerely apologize for the really really long wait. This chapter was actually finished like about a month ago, but I just needed to let it sit and kind of figure out some things going on in my own life. So thank you for waiting. Happy new year. <3

The Rose Garden is not a place one would normally think to find Chloe Bourgeois. Still, if someone looked back far enough into the history of the coffee shop’s customers, they would find a long list of various people with the Bourgeois family name occasionally stopping by and bringing guests. It’s seclusion and great food borders on an old family secret.

“See?” Chloe asks, indignant, as she points a lilac gel nail at the swooping black signature at the bottom of the page, dated September 5th, 1984. “It’s her.”

“Hmm, are you sure?” Nicola gets closer to the paper. “All I’m seeing are scribbles.”

“You know, I think those glasses may be defective, darling, because that definitely says Bourgeois. See, there’s even a B.

Her girlfriend shoves her slightly with her royal blue Gabriel handbag. “My eyes are fine. Your mom just had terrible handwriting.”

“You take that back!”

Nicola’s face is suddenly very close to hers. “Make me.” Her eyes hold a challenge that Chloe’s just about to consider taking when- “Excuse me, Miss Bourgeois,” a hurried hostess in red peers over the wooden stand at them. “Your table is ready.”

Chloe immediately steps back, suddenly worried that anyone saw them and got the wrong idea. Well, not the wrong idea, but the… It doesn’t matter. It. Doesn’t. Matter. Screw. What. They. Think.

Nicola links her arm in hers, unfazed by the interruption, as the hostess leads them to a small circular wooden table next to the large windows that overlook the garden. They’re wide open in the summer air, and Chloe thinks she spots a butterfly somewhere beyond their frames, but it’s gone in a split second.

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the signs as inspirational ff7 quotes
  • aries: "it's cuz of that !@#$ 'pizza' that everyone down here is suffering"
  • taurus: "quit slapping me! you old wench!!!"
  • gemini: "huh? finger!? what the hell?"
  • cancer: "sit down in those chairs and drink your goddamn TEA!"
  • leo: "alright everyone, let's mosey"
  • virgo: "you look like a bear wearing a marshmallow"
  • libra: "..............."
  • scorpio: "i ain't INTERESTED in a buncha scrubs like you!"
  • sagittarius: "out of my way. i'm going to see my mother"
  • capricorn: "this guy are sick"
  • aquarius: "i've been here since the beginning and i still don't know what the hell's goin' on"
  • pisces: "it's pretty hard standing on two feet"

OMGGGGGGGG YOU GUYS

So my favourite band growing up was The Tea Party, this was a canadian band which was popular here in the 90s and I think briefly popular in the US around 2000?

They were never a terribly popular band but man oh man I loved them, LOVED THEM, loved them with all my creepy obsessive teenaged heart, well into my adult years until their albums started getting boring and mainstream.

They played THE BEST LIVE SHOWS EVER, seriously, the BEST concerts I ever went to. All of my most fond memories of my early adult years were Tea Party concerts. They broke up like a decade ago, and then popped back up to do another tour recently

And

They are coming to my city in March! I just bought tickets and I am going to a goddamned Tea Party concert!

You guys don’t understand how much I love this band, I was super bummed I missed their last tour because it was for my favourite album, but never mind, this is the next best thing, they will be playing Transmission, and I will be there, I WILL BE THERE!

thefearofcod  asked:

Yo, your top five teas

YES YES YES

Tea = Life, my friend!

I’m a big ‘ol tea snob, and most of my favorite teas are from teavana.

  1. Gyokro Imperial Green Tea (aka my goddamn favorite green tea)
  2. Silver Yin Zhen Pearls White Tea (aka so smooth I could die tea)
  3. Monkey Picked Oolong Tea (aka I don’t think monkeys ACTUALLY pick it, but if they did, I’d be okay as long as they had their own union. XD)
  4. Golden Dragon Yellow Tea (aka the tea that the Gods drink and it’s way too expensive but I’ll drink it anyway and feel like the Goddess I am.)
  5. Choice Organic Black Tea (aka I use this tea to make sun tea in the summer and it’s damn delicious and addictive.)

Those are my teas of choice. :3

Ask me my top 5 anything!

lessons Ive learned about tea
(And projected onto aph England TBH):

never drink too much tea unless you wanna piss a fucking river

(Emeto/vomit/gross warning)
mint tea WILL NOT HELP YOU STOP VOMITING
but at least it doesn’t hurt and tastes fresh when it comes back up…????

(Note: i learned these a long time ago, it just so happens im goddamn drinking tea again and I remembered)

For the sake of humanitea, get the man some goddamn tea

Exo's reaction to finding out their crush is older than them

exo-gongju asked: EXO’s reaction to finding out their crush is older than them <3

- Thank you for the request, noona-ah~ <3


Kris: Huh, what did you say? That little woman is older than me? No, I don’t believe you.





Chanyeol: Oh my god, really? *laughs* But she looks so young!



Sehun: *chokes on his bubble tea* Every goddamn time!



Luhan: Huh. Didn’t see that coming. *not really bothered by it*



D.O: What? Ohhh… I’m totally fine with that and all. *fake smile* I’m still taller than her, right?



Suho: Nah, she’s going to be my jagi anyway.



Baekhyun: Look at that girl go~ *his friend tells him your age* Oh? Ohh… Okay then. Kkaebsong? *becomes a bit pouty*



Chen: *thinks it's a joke* Wait, were you serious?



Lay: But how is that possible? No one of that age can have such a fresh face!



Xiumin: But… most girls don’t like younger guys… *sees his chances drop down*



Tao: *turns away* I don’t care. THE GIRL WEARS GUCCI.



Kai: Such a tiny age gap doesn’t matter when it comes to this. *hugs the air, pretending it’s you*