Hmm. I know someone who can fit all those but is male. Are you interested in meeting him? I think you already have!
“NO! If its someone I’ve already met who’s male, I can assure you I hate him already. The only few males I’ve found myself able to talk to and not wish to destroy him and many there after is Chasey, whom is not a liable option as she- he-… they and I are simply friends, Mighty who is often exempt from this rule as he is quite infuriating with his incompetence, and Emerl, whom’s also a bit of a pain, but that’s not really so much his fault as it is who he was raised by.”
“..Oh there's also Knuckles, whom is a bit of a rear but that’s due to being an echidna. They’re just naturally despicable.”