god this is gonna be great

  • Light Yagami in Death Note: IMMA KILL ANYONE WHO STANDS IN MY WAY AND BE THE GOD OF MY NEW WORLD
  • Ryuk: Well this is basically my jam.
  • Light Yagami in the Netflix Deathnote: But I might be a boring nice guy
  • Ryuk: Yeah hey light, check out that mediocre bully guy. It'd be great if he died, right? Right? Right? Right? Just write his name down. Light, right his name down. FFS. NOW SAY HOW H'ES GONNA DIE. OH MY GOD.
Imagine being a boss in dark souls

You’re this millennia old god devouring, universe ending, legend, you’re literally so powerful that no one comes and challenges you anymore like it’s just the way things are. No ones like “man I bet I could take aldrich and dethrone him” because that’s just not a thought that crosses anyone’s mind. Your powers are beyond compare.

Then one day this skinny loincloth wearing ass naked little shit named fartmancer or something comes through with a pyromancied +7 great sword and tanks you in like three minutes. Your attacks don’t even phase him. Spells that have felled armies in one swoop are casually barrel rolled. Weapons that have slain gods are being raised against this dude and he’s just eating every hit like it’s breakfast.

Then when you die like the bitch that you apparently are??? he takes your hundred thousand souls and then loses them to a sentient pile of piss outside. They’re not even gonna be spent they’re just gone forever. And he doesn’t even care. They meant nothing to him.

What a fucking shit shoot that would be right?

Daily Prompto Doodle: 06222017
Stormblood Prompto is kinda my fav prompto right now! I had way to much fun drawing this! I’ll be going back on this later when I have more free time and making it a complete product!

3

andreil lil red riding hood au where neil befriends a golden wolf with sweets

i’m running with the wolves tonight

Keep reading

2

so me and @useless-protag started crying at this scene while watching the great gatsby and i promised myself ‘’i’m gonna draw this today or die trying’’

it’s 1 am im still alive B)

AUs no one asked for
  •  I’m sleeping over at my friend’s flat from university after study group and just got woken up in the middle of the night by their roommate, who is sitting in the kitchen, listening very loudly to the dirty dancing soundtrack and crying. Like wtf, I didn’t even know they had a roommate and normally I would yell at you but damn you are cute. You really need to stop tho dude, its 4am, some people in this house want to sleep AU
  • I am a barista and you are a customer who comes in every day and orders the same thing and today my friend brought you with them, I didn’t even know we had mutual friends and WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT IS NOT ACTUALLY YOUR NAME HAVE I REALLY BEEN WRITING A NAME THAT IS NOT EVEN CLOSE TO YOURS ON YOUR CUPS FOR OVER HALF A YEAR WHY HAVE YOU NEVER CORRECTED ME AU
  • The house party me and my friends threw kinda escalated and after throwing out everyone I found this half naked person passed out in my bed but I can’t be bothered to wake them up now so I’m just gonna go to sleep and deal with it in the morning, they are kind of cute anyway AU
  • (or alternatively) I just woke up in a stranger’s bed and I’m half naked, I cant remember anything about yesterday besides that the party was great and that I got absolutely wasted AND OH MY GOD THERE IS A HOT PERSON NEXT TO ME IN BED AND THEY ARE NOT WEARING MUCH WHAT DID WE DO YESTERDAY AU
  • You are my new coworker and I’m pretty sure I’ve never met you SO WHY ARE YOU LOOKING SO FAMILIAR FUCK I THINK YOU ARE ONE OF THOSE ANGSTY EMO KIDS I USED TO STALK BACK IN THE MYSPACE DAYS I CANT BELIEVE THIS AU
  • We work out at the same gym and you are my declared rival because we have the same workout routine and you are always better than me and on my way to the locker room I passed you in the shower where you were singing the opening of hannah montana and I can still hear you and you switched to the lion king now and even though I hate you I think I am kind of in love with you AU
  • I’m hiding in the bathroom of a restaurant from a spectacularly awful tinder date and you are in a similar situation because a guy at the bar just won’t stop hitting on you and now we are planning an epic escape together even though we only met ten minutes ago AU
How J'onn found out
  • J'onn: (thinking) hmm, alex seems distracted lately, i hope nothing's wrong.
  • J'onn: *reads alex's mind*
  • Alex: (thinking) i'm gay, i'm gay, i'm so fucking gay.
  • Alex: i wonder if j'onn can tell that i'm gay.
  • Alex: he probably can. it's so obvious.
  • Alex: also, he can read minds.
  • Alex: OH MY GOD IS HE READING MY MIND RIGHT NOW?!
  • Alex: shit. alex, think of something straight.
  • Alex:
  • Alex: boobs
  • Alex: shit
  • Alex: he can totally tell
  • Alex: shit shit shit
  • J'onn: (speaking) so how are you today, alex?
  • Alex: i'm gay
  • Alex: I MEAN I'M GREAT! THANKS FOR ASKING, J'ONN
  • J'onn:
  • Alex:
  • J'onn:
  • Alex: i'm gonna go over there now

all jokes aside, if klance doesn’t become canon i’m just….i’m gonna be really sad? there is SOMETHING there. there is chemistry and it’s obvious. they have so much potential, they could grow to have such a great, healthy relationship. it hurts me deeply knowing that if one of them were a girl, i wouldn’t even have to worry about this. god i just…i just want them to fall in love, in the sweetest way. it would be so important to so many people. it would be so important to me.

i found this post in my drafts and have ZERO memory of writing it (thank u alcohol) so im gonna put it in my queue lol
  • ok but imagine 
  • Bitty comes out to his parents but he doesn’t tell them about Jack, thinks it’s for the best, maybe to ease his parents into things or maybe to keep the pool of People Who Know as small as possible 
  • and like yeah Ransom and Holster are super oblivious but Suzanne Bittle is not, not when it comes to her son, because she is a certified Nosy Southern Mother and she can see he’s been acting differently, happier but quieter, always on his phone and blushing when she asks about boys
  • and he talks about the team a LOT 
  • Jack’s one of his best friends and he’s just started his NHL career, so of course Bitty’s never gonna shut up about Jack
  • (Same goes for Shitty and law school. And eventually Ransom and med school. Dicky is proud of his friends and wants everyone to know. He gets that trait from Suzanne, she understands)
  • but he keeps talking about this one Boy, how sweet he is and how his smile is like a sack of puppies and how bitty’s always making this boy do things with him like baking and getting froyo and going shopping and Suzanne is like. Yes. This must be Dicky’s secret boyfriend. 
  •  the next family weekend or whatever, Suzanne demands to meet this Chowder boy who’s stolen Bitty’s heart
  • Bitty is both confused and mortified

Keep reading

OMGCP characters as things my mom has said to me
  • Bitty: It's 3:30 in the morning and you have a sociology report due tomorrow why are you making a cheesecake
  • Jack: Hey could you step away from your hyperfixation for a second and look at this shirt design?
  • Ransom: [as im huddled in a ball under my bed] Is this because of school, the future, moving out, or all of the above?
  • Holster: I'm banning Moana songs from this house and it's all your fault
  • Lardo: If you don't stop drawing on your arms ill tape your fingers together
  • Shitty: WE GET IT, YOU'RE LIBERAL, JUST LET US EAT DINNER IN PEACE FOR ONCE
  • Dex: Did you...did you kick the dishwasher and then fix it BETTER than before you broke it?? ((note: this was a total accident))
  • Nursey: You look like a lesbian hipster in a portland vegan bakery
  • Chowder: If you called me in here just too tell me how nice your friends are AGAIN i'm adopting you off
  • Whiskey: Stop pretending you're cool we all know you cried over the Homeward Bound movie
  • Tango: I'll answer all of your questions about technology back in my day in a second just please for the love of god let me take a bath
  • Ollie&Wicks: How long have you been in the house?? i haven't seen you in like 3 days
  • Ford: You'd be a great politician, you're good at ordering people around and have a face that makes people inherently trust you
  • Johnson: please stop making me think about if i'm real or not while i'm buying toilet paper
  • Kent: You're never gonna get a boyfriend, your only redeemable quality is that cats like you
  • NOTE - im very very gay and like girls a Lot but im still in the closet, which is why these seem so uncharacteristically Hetero™
Seventeen as Things I’ve Heard the Kids I Babysit Say

PREFACE: I babysit for a set of twin boys that are six years old. They don’t know English that well so some of these are translated roughly. They have the most nihilistic sense of humor and it’s great and terrifying at the same time.

S.Coups: “I’m gonna name my first kid wardrobe! Then he’ll sound like a transformer!”

Jeonghan: “Kill me so I can be reborn into a into a caterpillar and sleep for a year.”

Joshua: “God loved me so much he had to make a photocopy.”

Jun: *Sprays brother with hose* “I hope that watermelon seed you ate starts growing and I get to have a tree brother.”

Hoshi: *Drops his popsicle and I offered to grab a new one* “Don’t ever get me a new one. Nothing in the world can make me happy.”

Wonwoo: “Someone called me emo today, I don’t know what that means, but I told them that calling someone names doesn’t get them any closer to their parents love.”

Woozi: “He can learn as much Japanese as he wants. Mom will still love me more.”

DK: *I made him put on pants* “I wish I was a girl so I didn’t have to wear these leg prisons!”

The8: *To the other brother* “I wish I absorbed you when we were in mom.” (This is what made me make this post)

Mingyu: “What does ‘abstinence’ mean?”

Seungkwan: “I think I’m the smartest in my class, these bitches think Santa is real.” *We had to have a talk*

Vernon: “I wanted my English name to be ‘dog,’ but my dad said no.”

Dino: *I asked one boy to stop eating the other’s food* “No, I’m going to grow stronger and defeat him.”

-peach

anonymous asked:

Hello, I was wondering if you have any recommendations for god AUs? I've just read Selenophile by whydoyouask on ao3 which great (pls read it) but ongoing. I love the idea with the gods though and I'd like to read something similar. Thank you :)

I love this request! Thank you so so much for these!

This absolutely stunning artwork inspired by Dancing Daffodils is created by @gairanelixir​! Check out their blog!


God AU


Dancing Daffodils by grayclouds, Mature, 40k (WIP)
Greek God AU where Yuuri is the god of Eros who falls for Victor, a man secluded/banished from the rest of society. Very sweet, and the mix of Greek mythology and YOI works amazingly well. I’ve rec’d this fic so many times, it’s that good! 

it’s gonna take a miracle by lunaetude, 8k
Chris might be a love deity, but it would probably take a thousand miracles just to get Viktor and Yuuri to confess already, dammit. HAHAHAHA I LOVE THIS FIC

Only Blooms at Night by queen_egotist, Explicit, 34k (WIP)
It has been more than two decades since winter has started. According to legends, only the most beautiful person in the village must be sacrificed to the God of Ice as his bride to appease his anger and end this eternal winter. Great god AU!

Selenophile by whydoyouask, Teen, 11k (WIP)
Victor is a long forgotten moon god. Yuuri is a lone believer. Thumbs up!

Winter Gods by my_name_is_Levi, Gen, 12k (WIP)
The story of a man cursed with Immortality after the gods took his lover from him, damning him to an eternity of meeting his love again and again, loving him and losing him. SO good!

If there’s a burning in your heart, don’t be alarmed by eeveepkmnfan, Teen, 31k (WIP)
When Yuuri first awoke, it was to the sight of snow. Taking it all in, his first thought was, ‘It’s beautiful.’ Omg this fic is amazing!

I have no heart, for you long ago stole it by exile_wrath, Gen, 4k
In which Eros, one of the six gods of love, falls for a mortal who thinks he’s unlovable. Rec’d by a follower!

Equinox by WhereverYouAre36, Teen, 8.2k (WIP)
Yuuri once said that Viktor’s eyes were akin to the arctic—stunning. “Winter suits you,” said the man as he dragged his fingers through his lover’s silver locks. WOW!

seafoam by reallysadfish, Gen, 2k
Some say he stole it. Others say he seduced his way to it. Either way, this is how Yuuri claimed the tide and the Ocean waited for him to come home. LOVE THIS!

To Love like You by IdunAurora, Teen, 4.6k
The story of how Yuuri’s love simultaneously ended his human life and Viktor’s days of loneliness. Stunning one shot!

Raindrops on Roses by UpliftingNightmares, Gen, 2.9k (WIP)
Viktor is a god who’s been waiting for a good reason to visit the realm of mortals and humans. So, when somebody folds just the right number of paper flowers, Viktor is more than happy to meet who has summoned him. But, who he finds is not who he expects. great fic so far, can’t wait for more!

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smart and smooth way to avoid giving speech by choi seunghyun

feel free to use one/two, all of the following prompts for your fanfics:

- “we need to talk. it’s important” “yes, oooookay. b-but not right now.” “what, why not?” “because we’re in the showers, we’re both naked, you’re cornering me, and people are staring”

- “X doesn’t like me. he doesn’t.” “what? are you listening to yourself?” “don’t be stupid. X is…well, great, and i’m just me.” “dude always smacks you in the ass before any match. he doesn’t do that to encourage you, believe me.”

- “i’m not kissing that!” “you owe me!” “but that thing is…green and. oh my, god, look at those eyes. they’re big. and they’re staring at me. i’m not gonna do this.” “but you have to! listen to me: fairy tales say that in order to break a curse you have to receive a kiss from your true love. kiss him!” “you’re crazy! is this a prank? i’ve never met this friend of yours! i’m not kissing that frog!” “he was talking about you when he transformed into a frog all of a sudden. fucking kiss him, please!”

- “hey, i know you like me because you’re always staring at me. you’re very cute. go out with me, please?…….why did he run away?” “aw, my friend’s super shy.”

- “hi, you don’t  know me, but look, my friend over there - yeah, that one - dared me to ask the most popular guy for a kiss. of course, you don’t have to, if you don’t want to. p-please, don’t punch me-” “sure.” “…” “cheek or lips?”