god this hurts so much

My Time To Shine

My whole life I’ve been quiet
Sitting in the side lines
Acting as a shadow in your light
Always there to support you
Always there catch you if you
Fall
But no more
Its my time to shine

I’ve got my own light
I’ve got my own life
I’ve got my own dreams
So why am I waisting time
Hoping he’ll come back
To my side

Too long he’s blocked my light
Pretending I was all he had
Then he met her
And tossed me away
God it hurt so much
I just wanted to die….
But no more
It’s my time to shine

I’ve got my own light
I’ve got my own life
I’ve got my own dream
So why am I waisting time
Hoping he’ll come back
To my side

The stage had always called
Right from when I was young
And hopeful
For what my life could be
I dreamed of a chance
But I had help him
But no more
It’s my time to shine

I’ve got my own light
I’ve got my own life
I’ve got my own dream
So why am I waisting time
Hoping he’ll come back
To my side

I imagined my name in lights
Performing for a screaming crowd
All wanting my life
And I’m standing here with my future in my hands
I was so scared without him
But no more
It’s my time to shine

I’ve got my own light
I’ve got my own life
I’ve got my own dream
So I won’t waist my time
Hoping he’ll come back
To my side

I’m chasing my light
I’m chasing my life
I’m chasing my dream
No I’m not waisting time
Hoping he’ll come back
To my side

It’s my time to shine
—————————————-
First song for my all LGBT musical.
It follows the story of Ally, a young woman that got married to her high school sweet heart Ben. She gave up her dream of performing to pay his way through Mrs school.
Five years later he’s finally done with school and her. When he leaves her for another woman.
Now with no where else to go she uses her little savings and goes to the big city to try and follow her dream.
However she takes the wrong bus and ends up losing her bag.
She is sitting on the sidewalk with no idea what to do when a woman comes up to her to ask if she’s ok.
After Ally explains her situation the woman named Becca offers her a place to stay for the night.
What starts out as one night turns into the two becoming room mates and then best friends.
As things progress Ally begins to develop feelings for Becca but Becca is in love with Harry.
Becca tries to tell Harry how she feels but Harry explains he’s trans and can’t afford to transition and doesn’t want to get into a relationship with her until he is his correct gender.
Becca is heart broken but understands and promises to wait for him.
However as time passes Harry just isn’t able to raise enough money.
Ally not being able to stand seeing the woman she had fallen for so sad or her friend continuing to struggle just to pay his rent, Ally suggests they hijack the old theatre and hold a fundraiser performance.
—————————————-
And that’s all I got so far, let me know what you think or if you have any suggestions

and i so badly wanted the little things to not matter. i didn’t want the thought of you touching another girl to matter or the fact that you probably don’t even think about me. i wanted it all not to matter. i wanted you to not matter because if you didn’t matter then it wouldn’t hurt that you haven’t even called in a year. it wouldn’t hurt that i still long to hear your voice at the end of the day. i didn’t want it to matter because when it matters it hurts. it hurts like hell. god, why does it hurt so much. i need it to not matter. i need you not to matter. why do you matter..
—  i should be over you//Deeply Feeling Series (via promisesofamazing)
I tried. I tried so hard to be everything you wanted. To make you happy. To see you smile. To hear you laugh. To be what you need. I tried so god damn hard and that is why it hurts so much that I wasn’t enough for you.
— 

I tried.

But that wasnt enough for you

Medicine (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

I’m so sorry for any stupid errors, its 2am and my brain is mush but I can’t sleep so I sHALL WRITE

-Jazz

Request; You are Bucky’s personal medicine, the only one that can calm him down. And HYDRA used you to keep him line. And she is small and fragile but when Bucky is taken to the Stark Tower he wants her so the team has to go get her from the HYRDA base. And she doesn’t talk much and gets scared and only trust Bucky and he is protective over her

Other characters featured; sam, steve, nat 

KEY

Y/N - Your name

Y/L/N - Your Last Name

Warnings; talks about torture, language 

Word count; 1449

Originally posted by rohgers


‘He won’t snap out of it, Rogers,’ Natasha explained, a sigh evident in her voice. ‘Usually he comes around after a day, but it’s been nearly a week and-’

‘- You need to give him time.’ Steve interrupted, staring at his best friend behind the glass.

 An ex-HYDRA agent had triggered his Winter Soldier mode on a recent mission and after much destruction and pain, they’d managed to get him into a Hulk-proof glass room. He kept coming in and out of the phase over the course of the week, sometimes Bucky and other times the Winter Soldier.

‘I wasn’t finished.’ The ginger assassin continued. ‘I was reading his files - Looking at what they used to calm him back at HYDRA.’

‘Don’t even go there. He can’t handle anymore drugs.’

‘It’s not a drug, Steve.’ Sam was now stood beside them, Bucky’s file in his hands. ‘It’s a person. Y/N Y/L/N.’

Their converation was abruptly stopped by a smashing of a metal fist against the glass - Bucky was stood in front of them, breathing heavily. He looked angry, but there was a glint of nostalgia in his eyes.

‘What did you just say?’ He spat.

‘Y/N,’ Steve said slowly. ‘You know them?’

‘Y/N,’ Bucky stepped away, muttering to himself. ‘For the first time in six days, he was calm, his words wild as he stared furiously at the floor.

‘There we go,’ Natasha grinned to herself. ‘We need Y/N.’

Bucky’s eyes snapped back up to hers at the mention of the name again.

‘We need Y/N.’ Steve nodded, repeating her words back to her. ‘But is she still there? Is she even still alive-’

‘Don’t you dare say that!’ Bucky yelled, smacking the glass again. ‘Stop talking about me like I’m not even here!’ He stopped, breathing heavily. ‘Of course she’s alive. She has to be.’

‘I’ll try, Buck. I promise.’

He grabbed Natasha and Sam by the elbows, yanking them into the office opposite to the holding room and out of earshot from Bucky. Sam was still reading the file while Natasha was peering over his shoulder.

‘She used to be good at calming him down,’ She explained. ‘HYDRA tried to separate them, they were too dependent on each other. After that, they got angry and both attempted to assassinate their guards until within each other’s presence again.’

‘That’s wild,’ Sam commented.

‘And it’s just what we need.’ Steve replied.

‘Are you suggesting we break into a HYDRA base?’ Natasha’s green eyes thinned, her ginger falling over her shoulder as she cocked her head to the side. ‘But which one?’

‘SHIELD traced the last base to somewhere on the outskirts of the city last week,’ He responded. ‘Their planning the raid to destroy, but if we can get in and out quickly and quietly without them noticing, Fury will be none the wiser.’

‘You are insane, Rogers.’ Sam huffed. ‘But I’m in.’

‘Me too.’ Natasha replied.


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10

That makes me think about those times I wanted to grab you and kiss you. But you didn’t know, so I would just pretend everything was cool. But really it was killing me. And I remember all those mornings before you even put on your makeup, when I would think to myself, “My God, she is beautiful.” And it hurt so much because I knew I could never tell you. But it was worth it just to be there looking at you.

“Why doesn’t he care?” 6.0

Kim Taehyung x Reader

Genre: Angst

Format: Text Post

[1.0] [2.0] [3.0] [4.0] [5.0] [6.0] [7.0] [8.0] [9.0] [9.5] [10.0] [11.0] [12.0] [13.0] [13.06]Finale


Originally posted by vminv

Y/N’s p.o.v

I was starting to drift off to sleep when I heard the front door open and close.

“Y/N? I’m home! Wait what the fuck? Why are all my things here? Y/N!” I could already hear the anger alongside of shock in his voice. I wheeled myself out of the bedroom to the hallway where he was stood beside his belongings looking angry until his eyes fell upon me.

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madstermojo2000  asked:

Vernon for the random au?

  • paramedic!vernon 
  • is the youngest of the EMT’s unit and everyone baby’s him and calls him cute when he comes in with his hair clipped back and his uniform on
  • and he’s like iM NOT,,,,,cute 
  • and they’re like ok mhm sure,,,,,,,but literally the nurses love him so much and when he’s on the night shift they’re like “vernon, here have a granola bar and some coffee and this extra heat pack-”
  • won’t say it, but he thinks doctors are super cool and he really likes watching them work
  • thinks he doesn’t have to wear his seatbelt when they’re riding in the ambulance but that’s a big mistake and almost knocks down a bunch of cotton swabs when the driver does a fast turn on the freeway
  • you,,,,,,are not the world’s most handy person so when you decide it’ll be a good idea to fix your curtains at literally 11 pm on a tuesday you don’t expect that you’ll make (1) false move
  • and go tumbling off the stairs, scrapping yourself on your coffee table and hitting your arm against the floor
  • and thankfully a neighbor hears the commotion and dials for the ambulance (since your arm hurts way too damn much)
  • and when it gets here,,,,,you see vernon and you’re like,,,,,,,woah,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,cute
  • and he’s asking you questions along with another EMT and you’re just dazed, maybe because you hit your head, maybe because he’s got the prettiest chocolate brown eyes you’ve ever seen
  • but you’re just like uhuh or no and vernon is like ‘ok let’s get you to the ER’
  • and as you’re laying in the ambulance, vernon shutting the doors 
  • and he leans over to get to treating the cut on your arm and he’s like “how did you fall?”
  • and you’re just like “are you an angel?” and he’s like,,,,,,,,,,,what
  • and you’re like “have you seen yourself? like how you look. like. what. like. did i hit my head that hard and im in heaven now or???”
  • and vernon is looking down at you and he’s like,,,stuck between being flattered and being confused
  • and he’s like 
  • “sorry, but are you flirting with me after you just broke your arm and are bleeding?”
  • and you grin and you’re like “yes” and vernon is like,,,,,,,well this is a new one
  • and you’re like “seriously? i feel like you get flirted with all the- Oh MY GOD MY HAND HURTS SO MUCH WHY DID I TRY TO MOVE IT”
  • and vernon is like akgfhlefjf but he gets your hand situated in a makeshift cast and he’s like “don’t move it or shift your weight,,,,,,,,,,,”
  • and when you get to the ER he’s like “the nurse will take you from here.” and you’re like ok,,,,,,,,,will i see you again
  • and vernon is like if you break your arm again and you’re like really??? and he’s like oh my god don’t get any ideas here ill write my number on your arm- wait it’s broken ok let me scribble it on your hospital bracelet while the nurse isn’t looking 
From The Dining Table - Harry Styles AU

Warnings: smut 

Summary: Where Harry really fucked up.

A/N: I’m sorry if there’s any grammar errors ! This is my first AU writing and I work really hard on this one, I hope you enjoy it ! (P.S GIF’s not mine)

Words: 1,844

PART 1 // PART 2

“Argh… Fuck.” Harry moaned, his hands were under his pants pumping his dick faster and faster until he reaches his climax, the hotel room are very quiet and cold. He made his way to the bathroom to shower and clean himself, the warm water are dripping all over his tense body, he’s been very lonely. He have been very busy with the debut album, everything is very exhausting that he forgot about [Y/N]. 

Tall skinny body, brown glowy skin, wavy hair she is so beautiful that Harry is confused why the hell she’s not a freaking super model. They have broken up months ago, but he’s still not over it yet, Harry found himself still thinking about her but Harry is positive that [Y/N] is 100% over him. He walked out of the shower after he finished drying his hair, because it became a routine ever since [Y/N] told him that it’s not good to sleep with your hair dripping wet. Harry misses her so much that it hurts his whole body, especially his chest. He misses her Tom Ford perfume Harry had gifted to her because the scent of that perfume just reminds him of [Y/N], the screaming that came from the dining table while she works on her job that is graphic design because she forgot to add another layer, coming home to her playing the grand piano, and the way she took care of him 

until he can’t take it, so he called her. 

“Hello?” Her voice are raspy, she sounds like she just got out of bed then Harry checked the digital clock that is beside his bed 

02:32 AM Crap. 

He thought, he forgot that it’s two in the freaking morning 

“Who the fuck is this?” She continued “It’s- It’s Ha- Harry.” Harry stutters “Why the hell are you calling me in this hour?! Can’t it wait tomorrow?”

 "Can- Can I come to your apartment?“ 

“In this hour? Hell no Styles.” She answered “Please [Y/N]?” She didn’t answer him for a couple seconds but then she agreed “Fine.”

 "Thanks Love.“ The nickname definitely slips out of his mouth, he didn’t mean to call her that, after he hung up he put on some clothes, took his keys and immediately drive to [Y/N]’s apartment. 

When he arrived at the white building he immediately made his way inside and went to the receptionist desk but he found the staff sleeping with his head rested on the wooden table so he went upstairs without leaving his ID at the receptionist desk. 

The elevator dinged when it arrived at the third floor, he walked outside and began to find [Y/N]’s apartment door. 

0703.The sign on the black door said, he knocked it a couple times but there is no sign that [Y/N] is making her way to the door, so he open up the door; it’s unlocked

 "God Damn it [Y/N].” He went inside quickly and walk straight to [Y/N]’s room and he’s never been so relieved in his life to see her sleeping safely in her bedroom, he sat at the small red couch beside her bed, watching someone while sleeping is overused and mainstream but he couldn’t tear his eyes off of the beautiful girl that is sleeping. After a couple minute watching her sleeping quietly Harry decided to go out of the room to get some water but Harry being the clumsy guy he is, he accidentally run in to her nightstand and knocked up a little night lamp “Fuck.” He hisses quietly 

“What the…” [Y/N] is awake by the time Harry clutching on his toes “I’m ver-very sorry, please go back to sleep.” He didn’t know what to say, It’s been months since the last time they saw each other “No, I just- you really came here.” She said

 "I did.“ He nodded, [Y/N] sighed and sit up "Why do you came here? It’s like in the middle of the night! This is so weird you are my ex boyfriend and-" 

"You didn’t lock your door, that’s dangerous.” He cut off her sentence 

“It’s not like I have something worth thousands of dollars inside this crappy apartment.” She answered “But they can hurt you.”

 "Why do you care Harry? Just go home okay, get some sleep I’m sure you have a lot of things to do tomorrow.“ She’s always been the type of girl that is not into complicated drama, if there’s a problem or a conflict she’ll try to fix it right away leaving the drama out of it 

"But I miss you.” That. There’s the words that Harry has been dying to say to her 

“Just go home okay H?” The nickname, she didn’t mean for it to slip out of her lips “There’s no alcohol in this world that can sink in the chest pain I am having every time I think about you.”

 "Go home Drama Queen, you don’t get to say that after leaving me with no phone call or text after the break up.“ She lay down and turn to the other side "I’m sorry [Y/N]." 

"You are forgiven, now go home get some sleep.” Harry sighed and sit at the edge of her bed, she’s never been the one that have a lot of money, she rarely treated herself, she hardly want to buy anything because her job didn’t pay her that well and Harry miss the time he can spoil her with anything even though she didn’t like it when people buy her things 

“Can I sleep here? On the couch?” He asked her “What ever I don’t care.” She coldly answered, Harry nodded despite the fact that she can’t see him so he took of his shoes and shirt leaving him with the dark grey sweatpants he is wearing and try to lay down on the couch and slowly he fell asleep. 

After about fifteen minuted being half asleep Harry are woken up by a sound of someone sobbing quietly, Harry immediately sit up and went over to the bed to check on [Y/N] 

“[Y/N]?” He whispered, she looked a little shocked “God damn it H, I thought you were asleep.” She rasp “I was.” Harry’s fingers are wiping the tears that is staining her beautiful face “Why are you crying? Tell me [Y/N].”

 "It’s just- It’s just that you don’t get to come here, calling in the middle of the night out of nowhere after you decided that you missed me! I have been missing you this whole time but I can’t just call you and tell you that I missed you! You can’t do that Harry that’s not fucking fair!“ She shouted, clutching on to the pillow she’s hugging, the familiar pain sensation spreading across his chest "I’m so sorry darling, that it took me a lot of time to realize that I missed you,” she shooked her head while the tears keep streaming out of her eyes, Harry tugged the wavy hair on to the back of her ears “Come one Love, show me your beautiful face,” She always falls for his charms, the way he talk to her made her knees weak, and somehow she always agree to do what he says as if she’s compelled she should be hating him after all of the things he did to her but as you can see now she’s letting him in again 

“There you go.” he began to dry the tears from her face and lay down beside her “I thought, maybe one day you’d call me and tell me that you’re sorry too. I waited Harry and God, I hate myself so much for getting my hopes up. It hurts H.”

 "I’m sorry, I’m sorry sweetheart. I’m here now, I’m not leaving you not again, not anymore,“ Harry lay down beside her and play with her hair from the back, he know that [Y/N] will be fast asleep if Harry played with her hair "I love you [Y/N], now sleep my love. I’ll be right here when you wake up.”

 Harry woke up with [Y/N] sleeping quietly beside him facing the big and dirty window, Harry didn’t have her wrapped around his arms because cuddles won’t instantly fix them, Harry don’t think that it’s what [Y/N] wanted, so he gave her space; just like what she wanted. It’s been a very long time since Harry came to this apartment, the last time he came here was before [Y/N] move to his apartment and help her packs up her things. Harry slowly sit up and walk outside her room to get something to eat, he went to the kitchen and open up the fridge; it doesn’t have anything unless two bottles of wine and Chinese food leftovers that is probably not edible by now Harry wants to go out and buy something to eat for both of them but he promised her when she wakes up he’s going to be right here.

 [Y/N] woke up facing the window, she roll over and found the space beside her empty. She sighs knowing that this would happen, and how she shouldn’t get her hopes up that Harry would stay the night. She checked her nightstand and no, he didn’t left any notes she told herself to get over it and get ready to start the day. 

Harry heard a shuffling in [Y/N]’s room and decided to check her, as he walk inside her room he saw her in a plain black bra set “JESUS!” She screamed and cover herself with a blanket “It’s nothing I haven’t see [Y/N].” He smirked “I thought you left.” She walk over to her the other side of her bed-still in her underwear and put on some clothes, Harry can’t stop staring at her, her body-god her body is amazing “I’m a man of my words [Y/N],” Harry answered [Y/N] respond him by rolling her eyes

 "Where are you going?“ He asked seeing her putting on a jeans and a grey sweater that looks like it’s Harry’s "Work, where else?” She answered 

“Skip work.” He said, [Y/N] shook her head and laugh coldly “You think I can just skip work? I’m not like you okay?” She went to the desk and put her laptop and the charger inside her black Saint Laurent bag Harry bought for her when he was in New York “Please? It’s just one day!”

 "No, I got paid only seven dollar per hour because I’m on training. I can’t lose this job Harry,“ she walk outside her bedroom putting on a black converse and walk to the door "Go home, you don’t have to lock the door on your way out.” She slammed shut the door leaving confused Harry and her heart at the green eyed man she loved so much. 

Fault - 2

(Part 1)

Summary:

“Bucky had never been held responsible for what he’d done, but you, oh god, everything that had happened had been your fault, and Bucky knew it too.”

Word Count: 1251
Warnings: Injury, angst


There are bright lights when you come to, blinding. That’s the first thing you notice.

The second is the pain, hitting you like a brick to the chest then spreading agonizingly quickly, like fire, to every inch of your body.

The third is that you’re moving. Fast.

“Stop–” You cough, hacking up your lungs as blood coats your lips. Bucky throws you a worried glance through the rear-view mirror, and then you’re moving faster.

Stop the car!” The words are just out of your mouth before your body convulses in on itself, sending you into another coughing fit, eyes daring to shut again because of the pain. The car jerks swiftly to the right, then jolts to a stop. In the backseat, you gasp for air.

The door above your head opens and cold air rushes in, stinging your face. It’s wet outside, but the sky is clearing up and there’s a couple stars shining, and you’re trying to focus on them in hopes that it’ll distract you from the pain. Then Bucky’s face appears in your line of sight, eyebrows pulled together, and his mouth is moving, saying the same thing over and over until you can finally make out his words. “What happened? What’s wrong?”

And truth be told? You’ve been wondering the exact same thing. There’s panic ebbing its way into your veins, coiling in your stomach and threatening to slip past your lips in cries for help, but you can only just manage to whisper between coughs.

You want to say something, but suddenly there’s a hand on your arm and every single nerve in your body tenses and there are alarms – sirens – going off in your head, the word danger flashing in an angry red in your mind. “Stop! Stop! Don’t touch me!”

The hand is gone as fast as it came, and Bucky’s alarmed face is in front of you again, eyes wide. He takes you in for a moment, barely concealed panic behind his blue eyes, before his expression falls into a neutral. “Look Y/N. Everything that happened back at the tower? We can deal with it later, okay? Just let me get you help first.”

You want to scream. Nothing makes sense. Nothing around you makes any sense at all, and the word ‘help’ is so foreign it sounds more like a threat than a promise of safety.

Your actions are slowed down by the wounds all over your body, and with your mind equally as hazy, you don’t get time to respond before the door slams shut. You flinch.

The front door opens and Bucky sits down and then he’s driving again, and you’re in and out of consciousness, trying to figure out a way to get out of the car but knowing that in your state, there’s no way you could manage.

“I have to–” you breathe sharply as the car swerves to the left. “Tell you something. Bucky, listen–”

There’s another sharp turn to the right this time. Your body lurches forward and the seat belt suddenly feels like a knife to the stomach, cutting into the exposed, bloody skin. It hurts, god, it hurts so much that you can barely focus on anything around you. Tears cloud your vision, and your eyes roll to the back of your head.

They know, Bucky. They know and they’re going to come back.

The words never slip past your lips.


“Look, I just–”

“You better get out of here before I blast your punk ass out.”

This is the second time you wake up to bright lights, and it takes a few blinks to clear your vision. This time, there’s no pain. Instead, it feels like you’re floating on a cloud, and everything around you is a different, calm kind of hazy. It feels kind of nice for once, until–

“Fuck.”

The arguing around you comes to a stop, and the constant hum of machines fills the room. Tony, casually leaning against the wall with a bag of dried blueberries in his hand, pushes off when he sees you awake. He throws a glance at the other man in the room , sporting a black and purple bruise around his left eye, and your breath hitches in your throat as you’re hit with an overwhelming sense of familiarity. There’s a thump in your chest, reflected by the quickened pace of the heartbeat monitor, and you shift backwards on the

The man looks at you, opens his mouth to say something, then stops at a cutting look from Tony. He closes his mouth, throws you one last glance, then shuffles out the door.

“How you feelin’, kid?” Tony asks as he walks to the side of your bed.

“Like shit.”

He laughs, and you can tell that he wants to say more, that there’s words caught on the tip of his tongue, but he bites them back with a lopsided grin and settles for a hair-ruffle instead. You’re too tired to swat him away.

The door swings open, and this time a nurse and doctor walk in. Routine procedure, now that you’re awake, they tell you. A couple broken ribs, a concussion, broken leg, four stitches across the forehead, twelve staples near the abdomen, and the list goes on. Then come the questions, which gain a few weird looks from Tony and a ton of scribbles from the nurse.

“You’ve been in a medically induced coma for the past week to aid in reducing the swelling of your brain,” the doctor says. You stare at him and he continues, “But you are showing symptoms of post-traumatic amnesia. It’s transient, so don’t stress about it. You received a lot of head trauma, so it’s expected. Your memories should return shortly; don’t try to force them back by thinking too hard, that’ll only hurt your head.”

You nod, trying to process the information. There’s this feeling that you can’t shake off, that you know something important that you have to tell someone, but you can’t figure it out and now you know why.

“We need to complete a few more tests, so you’ll be in here for the next couple days, but once that’s done, you’re free to go.” You nod again, and the doctor fixes some equipment around the room before leaving with the nurse trailing behind him.

Tony plops down in the plastic chair beside your bed. “Amnesia, huh?” You sigh in response.

“Okay, so, I was totally cool about the situation, but Capsicle? Think New York City, twenty-ten, fresh-out-of-the-ice. Guy was the most scared I’d ever seen.” A chuckle escapes your lips, followed by a groan of pain, and Tony only smiles.

“Get some rest, kid,” he says as he gets up to leave. “I’m gonna grab something to eat.”

And he’s almost at the door when the question that’s been bugging you can’t stay in your head any longer.

“Tee,” you croak, voice raspy and mouth parched. He pauses and turns to look at you, eyebrows raised in question. “Who was that guy you were talking to?”

Tony stiffens for a moment, eyes hardening and not meeting your gaze. Then he smiles, “No one you need to worry about right now, Y/N. Get some sleep.” He leaves the room.

For someone who had been asleep for the past week, you’re pretty tired. So you close your eyes, sinking into the pillow as sleep overtakes your body.

You dream of the man’s blue eyes and metal arm.


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“There’s been a bit of a sad moment for her. She’s sitting on a car, waiting for everyone to come out, and she’s clearly been upset. The guys come out of the building and Harley turns around and kinda just wipes away the tears and is suddenly happy again. I was just like “Oh god, she’s hurting so much but she’s making a joke.”
That is so what women do. It’s like, women totally do that for the sake of not making it uncomfortable for family members, to like, put on a brave face for their kids. I watched my mom, I watched so many women in my life, and it’s just like, they will swallow all of that and just… Women are tough, man.“

- Margot Robbie

dan and phil play keep talking and nobody explodes: a summary

hoodie!phil i am immediately enthralled and this video isn’t even a second in yet

“you da bomb of our lives”

they keep clothes fans give them which is nice shoutout to that lucky son of a gun

‘philly’

phil is insistent on everyone seeing speed

supportive boyf dan has his back

dan nudged phil’s arm in a bro-esque manner

they mentioned escape rooms finally i can relate as i have now been to one too

“i think we’re a lot nerdier than we think” why do they think we refer to them as nerds all the time

“rest in peace environment” / “fuck you trees”

“i’ll punch you if you look at this” going to provide no context there have fun

“DAD…. playing halo with me” nice save dan

the wholesome howell blanket is always on hand

“they’ll see if we do a single glance…”

how is dan going to go a whole extra seventeen minutes without glancing at phil i think he’s going to implode

they already did the tutorial but didn’t show us yet phil can’t remember the title of the game wow rip nerd!phil fic trope

“this is going to be a mistake”

“i can’t speak if i’m under some kind of situation” mister english degree back again

phil spinning dan around with those sweet sweet seconds of skin to skin contact (hand to arm)

also lowkey hand porn

look at his hands

the curly hair and shaved sides from the side profile makes my heart warm

sassy hand clicks from danny

“beginnu”

five seconds in i am already stressed for them why is this already the most intense video of this game i’ve ever seen i’ve watched like six different channels play it

“there’s, there’s-” “no phil, i’m guiding you.” someone likes to take control don’t they

during the wire puzzle you can slowly watch dan get more stressy look at his pursed lips and expressive strict hand gestures

“there’s an alien man with a triangle head and he’s got a T coming out of his neck” their best friend mind meld really needs to come in handy here

i’m still really enjoying dan’s side profile i can’t get over it

“that’s you selecting the module you dork”

“guys we’re nailing this” i was going to make the obvious joke but i won’t we’re classy here

“shut up shut up SHUT UP” stressy dan is here to stay

they did one wow who says youtube gamers can’t game screw you comments

“what everyone out there is thinking now is we need you to get the manual, phil” i think dan honey you just want to be in control again i know that was hard for you

getting their last glances at each other in before they can’t for at least five minutes

opposite sides again why has this happened two videos after one another this is weird what is the post-baking video universe coming to

“this is weird. now you’re the person with the really bright face… wow it makes my hair look so much less white now that i’m here”

“it makes my hair look grey… i promise i don’t have grey hair” honey you’re thirty years old it’s going to happen inevitably sometime soon best to break us in gently

i’m hyped for side profile phil

dan quoting the marriage mantra of something old something new etc…. foreshadowing perhaps who knows with the way 2017 phan is going

phil looks so confused he’s like me facing every exam i’ve ever taken

i’ve been cheated out of side profile phil ffs dan get your hands on him and spin him around i feel attacked

“oh shit new stuff” literally everyone every few days when they upload a new gaming vid with no warning????? they know our struggle????

phil looks so focused i’m entranced

“ayeeeeeeee”

“oh god it’s hurting my brain so much”

stressy phil is a new experience but i’m digging it

dan being the little shit he is just laughs all the time

“stop freaking out!” stressy dan is still here despite having the opposite role

they did two attempts and won them both wow

they high fived yes for more skin to skin contact

phil is reeeealllly making up for lost time by shamelessly staring at dan

like seriously that was at least a solid six seconds of him staring

oh and more glances

i get it you’re in love

“kept calm under presh”

more staring seriously phil are you aware the camera is still rolling

“i hate to alarm you phil but what is your catchphrase on this gaming channel?”

*awkward silence whilst phil realises he’s being spoken to thus has to tear his gaze away*

“ALL OR NOTHING”

*resumes staring*

seriously what is with him today subtlety ain’t in his vocabulary

p h i l i get it you’re in love

oh now dan’s at it

dan just got super close to the camera and did that creepy smile he has i was unnerved

“i’m frickin terrified as diddly heck”

they’re back on their own sides balance in the universe has been destroyed do you reckon they’re as insistent about which side of the bed they sleep on

side profile dan is back welcome back old friend i missed you

i thought he dabbed for a second but it’s okay he didn’t

they’re determined as fuck but i can already see dan’s stressing

yep there’s the hurry up hand gestures

“i’m going to explode…. literally” because of the intensity or because he can’t stare at phil i don’t even know anymore u decide

dan’s eyes just got really really wide they were like bulging

“is the button yellow?” “no it’s blue i told you it’s blue!” welcome back stressy phil i hope you had a nice break

phil’s little “ooh” is so cute i want it as my ringtone

“we did it? oh christ”

stressy dan is really coming out to play in this symbols puzzle isn’t he

phil’s expressive hand gestures aka he’s beginning to panic too

dan’s doing some kind of gang sign okay boy you do you

aaaaand there’s the deafening dan scream for this video i can’t believe we lasted a whole 17 minutes and 40 seconds without one

rip headphone users it was nice knowing you

stressy dan has never been more present

phil is surprisingly calm(er)

“dan come on” all of us all the time

oooooh they couldn’t last five minutes without a quick glance at one another could they jfc get a room

they managed with three seconds to spare

phil is giggly and dan is….. well, dan

dramatic as ever my little actor that never was

phil initiates skin to skin contact again why am i not surprised anymore

“i was winding you up” dan says as he adds flames on top of himself in editing i am nodding furiously

the camera pans back out and phil’s hood is up who even is he

“we could have died!” “but we didn’t” *dan adds a halo above his head aka can’t relate*

“see if i worked in bomb disposal, i’d be cheeky like that” your colleagues would throw a bomb in bed with you

“i’d be like ooh what’s the timer steve???” the danxsteve fic coming atcha real soon

dan’s in an obnoxiously good mood now he has won a game and can freely stare at phil again

“we could be bomb disposal experts” again expect the fic coming atcha real soon

“what you just saw was two nerds that grew up playing puzzle games that have a psychic connection because they have no other friends defusing bombs” they literally said they go to escape rooms for their friends birthdays but alright i’ll take the exclusivity

they’re considering coming back in hard mode YES I NEED THIS

again i could have made the obvious joke there but i didn’t

let them know how you felt throughout that video type out long essays i dare you

“subscribe if you’re happy you didn’t explode”

“if you want to see us do that more challenging version where we might blow up… or not 'cause we’re the best… disposers ever”

“subscribe to us, have a good day, don’t explode” the best advice comes in threes

danisnotexploding

AmazingBombDisposer

Well, Shit. (A Voltron Fanfiction Chapter 4)

Hey guys! Chapter 4 is here! Chapter 5 is in the works, no worries! The ending is a bit better than the other chapter so enjoy! 

Want to read from the beginning? Here you go!

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/156859812181/well-shit-a-voltron-fanficiton

CHAPTER 5 IS HERE:

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157254073496/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-5

CHAPTER 6 IS HERE!

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157296304031/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-6

CHAPTER 7 TOO!

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157378879001/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-7

CHAPTER 8:

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157547824756/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-8

CHAPTER 9:

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157710839871/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-9

CHAPTER 10:

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157841715481/well-shit-a-voltron-fanficition-chapter-10

When The Voltron Team are about to escape Prince Lotor with Lance with them, his heart stops. The team is so close to the Castle. But can they save him in time?

Chapter 4: Well, Damn.

Keith had noticed how quiet Lance had gotten when he strapped him into the seat in the back of the Green lion. But he was busy grabbing the first aid kit and wrapping up his bleeding hands, preoccupied. But Lance’s hands were cold, He had been sweating the entire time during the escape but now he wasn’t. Then Keith looked up from wrapping one of his hands, looking at Lance’s face and realized he wasn’t breathing.

Keith’s hand flew up to Lance’s neck searching for any kind of heart beat. Nothing. Lance’s heart wasn’t beating.

FUCK! Pidge I need you to go faster!” Keith shouted.

“What? What happened?” Pidge shouted her eyes not straying from where she was flying.

Keith’s voice rose, panicked, “Lance’s heart just stopped beating!” He screamed.

There was a moment of pure silence before Keith jumped up, undoing Lance’s straps and throwing his body to the floor. Keith kneeled beside him trying to remember every CPR class he ever had at the Garrison. Keith placed his hands over the middle of Lance’s chest and pumped hard and fast counting in groups of thirty. He was determined, there was no way that he was going to let this idiot die when they were so damn close to saving him.

Shiro’s voice came on over the comms, filling Pidge’s ears and bringing her back to reality.

“Okay, Keith is performing CPR. Hunk cover Pidge, keep anything trying to hit her off of her. I’ll take care of anything in her way. Pidge, I need you to go as fast as you can! Allura, we’re coming in hot!” He said.

The yellow and black lions were at her side in an instant and Pidge pushed Green even further, going faster than she had ever dared to fly her. Keith’s counting was like a panicked drum beat against her ear. Shiro cut down anyone who came in her way and Hunk protected her. She had to get to the castle.

Keith kept pumping, pausing a beat or two to check Lance’s pulse. Nothing. He kept pumping. He looked up, briefly and had never been more thankful to see the castle and the hangar only seconds away. His arms were screaming, sweat pouring from his head and silently begging Lance to come back. Lance’s face was so so pale and he didn’t twitch, he didn’t do anything. He was just lying there limp. Keith kept pumping.

They were landing in the hangar, Pidge let go of the controls and practically ran out of her seat to sit next to Keith anxiously grabbing Lance’s arm. The green lion landed herself in the hangar, opening her mouth immediately as seconds later Shiro and Hunk were running up the ramp, all gathering around Lance.

Shiro said something about being on board and Allura created a wormhole and they left the galra behind. Keith kept pumping. Shiro tried to take over but Keith shook his head. It was his responsibility just a bit more, he could do it. He silently begged Lance to open his eyes, to do something. 

As if Lance somehow heard his thoughts, he took a sudden breath and began to cough. They all cried in relief.

Lance!” Pidge shouted.

“Oh my god Lance.” Shiro said.

“Lance, buddy!” Hunk said through tears.

Keith remained silent, breathing hard himself, just sitting back as Lance rolled onto his side still coughing violently. Shiro placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, avoiding the burns on his back as he winced in sympathy. Lance was still coughing, trying to breathe normally.

“Lance, it’s okay just try to take slow breaths, you’re fine now.” Shiro said soothingly.

It took him several tries but his breathing did become normal again. So he just laid on his side breathing for a bit before rolling onto his back again. He was so happy to see everyone again. Lance smiled and didn’t even notice that he wasn’t in any pain, too happy to see his friends again.

“Hey guys.” Lance said voice scratchy.

Keith huffed, “Don’t hey guys me! You fucking scared me just now! Who the hell told you that you were allowed to stop your heart huh?” He said, exasperated. But there was no heat in his voice, just concern.

Lance looked at Keith, turning his head so that he could see him with his right eye.

“Yeah sorry dude. Thanks for the save.” Lance laughed weakly. He raised his hand and Keith took it gently, mindful of the wounds.

Hunk spoke up, “Lance how are you dude? You look like a mess.” He stated.

Lance laughed a little, “Thanks bro. I’m feel fine I guess?” Lance said, sounding confused by his own statement.

Shiro felt a jolt going through his heart, sudden panic.

“Lance, what do you mean you feel fine?” He asked, “Be honest.” There was no way he could feel even remotely fine in his state.

Lance moved his eyes slowly to Shiro whose face was just above him.

“Like, I’m not in pain. Or maybe more like I can’t feel anything.” He said, Shiro went pale and Lance was about to ask why when sudden pain in his abdomen made him choke. 

Nevermind, scratch that he was in a lot of pain. It was a stabbing pain so horrible and sudden, he slapped Keith’s hand away grabbing his left side and curled in, god why did it hurt so much?

“Lance. Lance!” Shiro shouted, trying to move Lance’s hands and see the problem. Hunk grabbed Lance’s hands, pulling them away by force. Pidge grabbed the end of Lance’s black suit shirt and pulled it up. Lance’s side was swelling badly and a dark shade of purple had blossomed across his swollen stomach.

Shiro swallowed the lump in his throat before he began to give orders.

“Lance is internally bleeding, we need to get him to the healing pod now. Hunk help Lance onto my back, I’ll carrying him to the healing deck. Princess, I need you and Coran in the healing room NOW.” Shiro was practically shouting. Hunk grabbed Lance by the shoulders, helping him sit upright.

“Buddy I know you’re in a lot of pain right now but we have to get you on Shiro’s back so we can get you fixed up okay?” Hunk said gently but all serious, moving Lance’s body into position. Lance wasn’t making any sound, just biting his lip and becoming paler by the second.

After some maneuvering Lance was on Shiro’s back. Shiro started running with Pidge, Keith and Hunk following closely behind. Shiro could hear Lance’s breathing in his ear, erratic and short. He ran as fast as he could through the castle, finally getting to the healing pod room with Allura and Corran arriving from the other direction. Shiro ran inside, Allura followed behind and Coran stopped the other paladins from entering.

“It’s best if you wait outside. As soon as he is in the pod we’ll let you back in.” He said before closing the door behind him leaving Keith, Hunk and Pidge waiting in the hall.


Shiro laid Lance down on an examine table as gently as he could. Allura helping him her face pale at the sight. It was truly horrible.

“How long was his heart stopped?” She asked, grabbing equipment as she spoke.

Shiro paused thinking, “Three minutes, Princess.” He shuddered as he thought that, Lance had been dead for three minutes.

“Alright. He’s lost a lot of blood by the look of his hands. We need to remove his suit so I can reach his injuries and prepare him for the pod.” She stated.

Shiro nodded, grabbing the top of Lance’s shirt. With how much fabric had been burned off his back it was amazing that Lance’s shirt even managed to stay on. He was about to rip it off when Lance’s hand stopped him.

“W-wait, give me a minute to- to…” He couldn’t really finish his sentence but he didn’t have to.

Shiro noticed that his injures on his hands and up his arms were covered by the fabric. They hadn’t bothered to remove it. So when the injuries healed the scabs had fused with the fabric. So when they rip it off… Shiro swallowed, it’ll be like tearing off a layer of skin.

Okay, it’s okay Lance you just tell me when you’re ready. It’ll be as quick as I can make it.” Shiro said.

“Like ripping off a Band-Aid?” Lance asked, smiling slightly but his eyes were wide.

Shiro nodded, “Yeah like a Band-Aid.”

Lance’s eyes closed, breathing in and out trying to slow down his breathing. But eventually he nodded. Shiro grabbed one side of the shirt, Coran the other and they ripped it off in one quick motion.

Lance let out a scream so loud, Shiro thought he might never get the sound out of his head. It was the sound of a wounded animal. A split second after Lance shut his mouth, tensing, the scream muffling in his throat before it stopped entirely. Lance’s head rolled to the side, limp. Shiro panicked, checking his pulse and let out a sigh of relief when he felt it fluttering under his fingers. Lance was just unconscious. 

Oh, oh Lance.” Allura whispered.

Shiro turned finally looking at the paladin’s body. He couldn’t look away. Lance’s arms and hands were covered in deep cuts that overlapped one another on every inch of available skin. The cuts stopped at the bicep of each arm but the skin was angry and red and now blood flowed freely from the cuts. Coran moved to stop the bleeding as Allura grabbed a jar of some jell and started putting it on the open wounds. It stopped the bleeding when the cuts made contact with the jell. Giant purple bruising and swelling covered Lance’s left side but the bruising continued across his chest and onto both of his wrists. His skin was pale and Allura couldn’t stop the tears from falling down her face but continued to put the salve on Lance’s wounds.

Shiro and Coran worked Lance’s pants off of him, purple bruising on his ankles. His legs looked skinnier than usual but other than the bruising they seemed okay. Some good news.

Shiro and Coran worked the white suit for the healing pod onto Lance, waiting for Allura to put the rest of the salve on before shoving his arms into the sleeves as gently as possible. They sat the unconscious Lance up and Allura gasped.

Lance’s back was horribly burned and Allura could only stare at what was left of his distorted skin.

“I-I don’t know if…” But she didn’t finish.

“Princess, you don’t know what?” Shiro asked.

“I don’t know if the healing pod can fix this.” She stated, hand hovering just above Lance’s back.

Shiro was shocked into silence for a moment, “Wait what do you mean? The pod can’t fix burns?”

She shook her head, “No, no not burns. This wound… it’s already healed. Not completely and certainly not correctly but it’s healed. Anything that’s been healed can’t be undone. The healing pod can’t fix this. That’s why it doesn’t fix the scar across your nose, Shiro. Because it has…”

“Already healed.” Shiro finished for her. Allura nodded. Shiro looked at Lance’s back, the patchwork of disjointed skin.

“So… so what? He’ll be scarred? He’ll keep this burn on his back?” Shiro asked.

Allura nodded, “Yes. I think so, most of it at least. Some of it might heal but it will remain. He might keep the scars on his hands too. I don’t know how much the pod can do for him in that sense. We’ll just have to see.” She said, sounding disappointed, in what? Herself? Probably.

She gently zipped up the back of the white suit, Lance’s scar peaking up over the suit on the back of his neck. Coran and Shiro carried him between them gently and placed him in the pod. The glass door shut and Lance was suspended in blue light. All they could do now was wait.


Keith, Hunk and Pidge waited anxiously in the hall. Pidge seated next to the door, Keith standing on the other side and Hunk directly in front of the door his hands wriggling around each other in a nervous dance. They didn’t say anything to one another, just stood there.

But they heard Lance scream, so full of pain that Hunk tried to tear his way through the door to get to him. Keith and Pidge stopped him but their combined strength was no match for Hunk. But they pushed him back as best they could.

“Hunk. Hunk! Wait!” Pidge begged pushing against his waist.

“Hunk stop!” Keith said, pushing his chest.

“Let GO! He needs me! He’s hurt! He’s… oh my god LANCE!” Hunk cried, tears streaming down his face. But the emotion eventually became too much and he stopped fighting. But Keith and Pidge didn’t let him go, hugging him close as he collapsed against them.

“Hunk, they’re not hurting him. Lance is going to be okay. They’ll put him in the pod and it’ll fix him up. Don’t worry.” Pidge said, tears of her own streaming down her face.

Hunk nodded and the three of them stayed like that for a while before letting go. Pidge kept a hand on Hunk’s arm and Keith one on his shoulder and they waited.


Finally the door opened. Coran stepped out looking pale but smiled.

“You can come and see Lance now.” He said.

Hunk barreled his way through the door making a beeline to Lance’s pod with Pidge and Keith on his heels. Lance was suspended in the pod just like they had seen him several times before, expressionless but alive. They looked at Lance for a while before turning to Allura and Shiro who stood several feet away watching them, Coran eventually joining them.

“How is he?” Hunk asked quietly.

Allura answered.

“He’ll be fine.” They breathed a sigh of relief before she continued, “However there may be some complications.” She said finally.

“What do you mean?” Keith asked confused.

Allura swallowed, “Some of Lance’s wounds have already healed. Like the burn on his back for example. Even though it hasn’t healed correctly it is still healed.” She stated, “So the healing pod can’t reverse it.”

“So like if you broke your leg and it healed wrong, it’s still technically healed. That’s why you have to break it again and set it before it can heal properly, right?” Said Pidge.

Allura smiled slightly, “Yes, exactly. Some of the scarring will likely lessen thanks to the healing pod but it won’t go away. The same can be said for his other injuries. I don’t know to what extent they’ll be healed until he is released from the pod. However the bruising and internal bleeding will be healed within the next couple hours. But there are other things that concern me.” She said.

“Pidge when you downloaded the files on Lance, you sent them directly to the ship and in the last couple of minutes I was able to look at some of the data. I haven’t gone through the whole thing but what I have looked at has disturbed me.” A hologram came up with the 52 files that Pidge had found. Allura opened one, although none of them could read Galran but Allura explained.

“It looks like for the entire time that Lance was on board Lotor’s ship he didn’t need to perform any bodily functions… like eating for example. It was like they had somehow kept Lance’s body in some sort of suspended state where he didn’t need to perform such tasks to stay alive.” She said.

Woah woah woah, not eating? That includes sleeping right? How can the galra even do that?” Hunk asked, eyes wide.

“That’s what concerns me. According to this Lance was allowed one hour of sleep per day, sometimes less. It’s a tactic used to create a sort of kinship with the torturer, making the subject more willing to give up information. Giving him a little sleep in exchange for cooperation. However Lance never once gave them any information and never gave them answers to their questions. However this right here,” She pointed to the bottom of the file, “They describe the process in which they give Lance large amounts of quintessence directly into his blood stream.” Allura said.

What?” Shiro said, shocked. “Quintessence prolonged Zarkon’s life, right? What does that mean for Lance?” He asked.

“That’s my concern. Quintessence is an extremely powerful substance and essentially it’s pure life energy. The Balmera can produce it naturally through its crystals but the substance given to Lance is enhanced, about three times as powerful as what the Balmera can produce. I believe this is the reason Lance didn’t need to eat or sleep during his time on Lotor’s ship. However from what was described, the process of giving Lance the quintessence was… extremely painful.” She paused, “He would being in pain for hours, seizing, screaming. This substance is so powerful and to put it directly into a human’s blood stream…” She shook her head, “It would be like pouring an extremely hot liquid metal into a thin container. The container would be able to hold it for a while but eventually…”

“It would melt.” Keith finished.

Allura nodded, “Yes.” She said.

There was a long silence. The concern for their friend was palpable.

“What happened once it was in his body?” Pidge asked.

“He absorbed it slowly, like it would with a vitamin or medicine but it’s why he would be in pain for hours. But I have yet to figure out how is changed his body chemistry.” She said.

“But wait.” Said Keith, “When I was injured I accidentally poured some of that stuff on my hand and I absorbed it, it healed my wounds. Why didn’t it do that for Lance?” Keith asked.

Allura turned looking at him, “Keith, you’re part galra. We don’t know how much but at least some of your DNA is Galran. Galra can easy absorb quintessence in small amounts which is why you absorbed it quickly and it healed your wounds. However Lance is completely human and so we don’t know how it will affect him, human physiology is rather frail compared to other species. I can’t even begin to say what may occur, if anything. It is possible that there will be no changed of any kind but we won’t know until he wakes up.” She said, sighing.

“How long will that be?” Shiro asked.

Allura paused, “Three days, in your Earth time.” She stated.

Three DAYS?” Hunk asked shocked, “None of us have spent more than a couple of hours in the healing pods before! Even when Lance was injured after the explosion he was only in there for half a day!” Hunk practically shouted.

“Hunk, please listen. Lance is both physically and mentally exhausted. His body needs to spend more time to recover. However he will be much better for it. We’ll just need to wait.” She said.

They all looked at Lance, suspended in the blue light of the pod. All they had to do was wait.

SIRIUS BLACK APPRECIATION POST

BECAUSE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH but of course no one could love him as much as Remus does


Seriously though??


Like can you just imagine what Sirius felt when he found out he was disowned by his family because damn that must have hurt a fuck ton. It doesn’t matter if he hates them—they’re still family. And maybe, just maybe, he had been hoping against hope that they would change, no matter how impossible it may be, because Sirius Black is one arrogant little shit. But instead they disown him, forced his brother to immediately cut off all sorts of contact with him, and he was all alone again, but this time it was for real.

Because him being blasted off the family tree meant that no one stood up to defend his name in his absence. No one in his family gave a fuck about him, as they all stood there, assembled in the room, silently watching Wulburga Black exile her eldest son from the bloodline.

And, god, it hurt so damn much. The worst part? He had to act like everything was all dandy, because if he didn’t, people would start asking questions, and eventually, everyone would find out about it. And he didn’t want that. So he smiled and laughed and joked about, but there was always an ever present aching in his chest. He was getting quite used to it, actually, smiling through the pain. Because that’s all he ever learned to do when he had nothing left.

But Remus, oh, sweet Remus, he saw through the façade. He saw the the way his smile never truly reached his eyes, the carefully concealed pain behind his lighthearted words, the way Sirius would space out more than usual. Remus knew something was wrong, but if Sirius didn’t feel like telling him yet, then he wouldn’t prod for answers. All he needed to do was be there and make sure that Sirius knew this as well. And he did. Sirius definitely noticed that Remus joked about around him more often, and that the lycanthrope made sure that they were almost always somehow touching—a hand on the small of his back, an arm slung around his shoulder, hands brushing against his ever so lightly, and tight, crushing hugs—and he tried not to break down every time Remus gave him a warm smile, or when he would kindly correct Sirius’ mistakes instead of laughing at them.

Then Sirius had stumbled across the Common Room, drunk and pissed at the late hours of the night when no one else was awake, except for, of course, Lupin, who was leaning against the wall near the fireplace, waiting for his friend to come back. And he just blew up, shouting god forsaken shit at the other boy, calling him names and so much more, and he knew he had hurt Remus—he fucking knew, and it broke him, because he was actually saying them to himself more—but Remus never left his side.

“Are you finished?” he had asked, his face devoid of any emotion. When Sirius didn’t answer, the prefect strode over toward him, hands casually tucked inside the pockets of his pyjama shorts. “If you were trying to get to me, Pads, it didn’t really work, because I should have you know that most of those things you’ve said, I’ve been saying to myself. I know that you’re trying to push me away, but I’m a stubborn bastard, so you better learn to accept that and let me help you, or I’m not going to stop trying.”

And Sirius broke down, because finally—finally—someone cared. He didn’t give a bloody fuck if that sounded selfish, but after years of being raised to become perfect, to be someone he wasn’t, and have people care about him because of that image, he just snapped. All the years of pain and tiredness had come flooding out and he didn’t even protest as Remus enveloped him in a hug, murmuring comforts into his ears, and basically just becoming the anchor that Sirius needed so desperately because everything was always being taken away from him, and he knew that he needed something permanent—something stable and real and just there.

And that was Remus.

I’m so weak right now because of this wowza but I dont know how this turned into a Wolfstar post but I also really love Remus Lupin??? Also I don’t get why Lupin’s often projected as innocent and strict but with a good sense of humor so I just want to point out that he’s a stubborn and mischievous ass too ok bye

Strings Attached

Summary:  Marinette could see the red strings of fate holding people together, but no one was allowed to know that.  That fact didn’t stop her from using her knowledge to nudge soulmates together.  Of course, this led to her getting a reputation as the class matchmaker, which isn’t an issue until her soulmate, Adrien Agreste, asks her to set him up with another girl.  

Red Strings of Fate/Soulmate AU!

AO3 | 1 | 2 | 3

Chapter 1: Romeo and Juliet

They say everyone is born with a soulmate, a person who they are tied to with an invisible string that binds the two people together.  They also say that a small percentage of the human population could even see the strings,  though it’s such small amount that most believe such seers to be nothing more than a myth or  scam artists who tell people who their “soulmates” are just to take their money.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng is a seer.  She walks through life with a constant mess of red strings in her view binding everyone around her to their soulmates.  She can’t remember when she got this ability.  She’s had it for as long as she can remember,  however her parents love recounting the story of how they found out.

Keep reading

but what if steve was missing. he’s been out on a mission a hundred miles away and then he just drops off the radar and disappears.

tony’s devastated. he’s been in love with steve for years and years and years, not that he’d ever tell steve that, because steve’s lovely and amazing and perfect and deserves so much better than a shitty messed up broken person like tony-

anyway tony and everyone else try everything they can think of to find him. tony hasn’t slept for days, hardly eaten, desperately hacking security systems worldwide to try and find just a trace of steve. but there’s nothing.

he’s got an old shirt of steve’s, worn soft and thin but smelling like steve. (tony Did Not steal it) and he’s drained and exhausted and heartsick and nothing’s working, and he finds himself curling into a ball on the couch in his workshop with steve’s shirt pressed to his face,

and then he’s sobbing, trying to stop himself but he just can’t, harsh wracking sobs that hurt his chest as they tear out of him, crying into steve’s shirt as he holds onto it with shaking hands.

he ends up falling asleep out of pure exhaustion.

anyway in the meantime steve has just been released from an interdimensional time void by stephen strange, and portalled right back to avengers tower. and he bursts in to find tony.

and tony’s lying there curled up in a little ball, asleep, his little face tearstreaked and exhausted and pressed into steve’s old t-shirt, his fingers all twisted up in it too as though he’s never going to let it go.

steve comes and looks down at him and loves him so much it hurts, and god, he’d thought he wasn’t ever coming back, that he’d never see tony again, and now he gets this second chance and he’s damned if he’s going to let it slip away.

so he puts his hand on tony’s back and rubs gently, and says ‘hey. miss me?’

and tony’s eyes fly open, red-rimmed and puffy, and he just stares disbelievingly up into steve’s face for a few seconds.

steve gives him a little wobbly smile. and tony bursts into tears and launches himself at steve’s chest and buries his face in steve’s neck and sobs fiercely at him, ‘don’t you dare - ever - ever do that - again, i hate you, i hate you,’ except he’s clinging on to steve and shaking and curling himself closer and it doesn’t really feel like he hates steve at all.

and steve peppers little kisses all over tony’s forehead and hair, whispering ‘i won’t - i couldn’t help - i love you, god, i love you, tony, i love you, i missed you so much.’

and then he kisses tony’s little wet face, and tony grabs his face and comes desperately towards him until their lips meet, and steve kisses him softly, pouring all his love and longing into it, kissing away the taste of tony’s tears.

(more ficlets on the ‘stevetony ficlet’ tag on my blog)

Stay

Pairing: Sebastian X Reader

Words: 1,153

Warnings: SMUT. And NSFW gifs. Also, please use a condom you guys.

Anon asked “Hey, it’s the anon who requested ‘so far’.. I wanted to ask if you can do another imagine where the reader and Seb have been best friends since forever and they both have feelings for each other but don’t act upon it and they get into a heated argument and Seb sees how important the reader is in his life and idk what else.. thank you”

A/N: Here ya go. Part 3 of Who I Want to Be. I haven’t written smut in a while This is my first time writing actual smut so please be nice in the comments. Gifs not mine!!!

Tagging: @ccrossfire  @jared-padaloveme

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Welp. Ended up doodling this little cinnamon roll instead of doing my overflowing mountain of HW
fuuuuuck me :’)
but anyway

a hint of Gramander because again, I’ve fallen into another fandom pit and I just can’t seem to claw my way out

but I thought I’d maybe write something for it
please don’t judge though, I’m pretty shit at writing and I’ve never done it before so here goes nothing
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anonymous asked:

Hello! May i request for How would RFA+Saeran and V react to an MC saving them from being hit by a car or taking a bullet for them! hahah Can be angsty or not :3 Thank you sooo much! love your blog :)

listen…… u come into my house.. and you ask this thing of me.… (ʘ‿ʘ✿)

also i wrote these baaaasically in reverse order? and kind of definitely ran out of steam for the rest,, ha, ,,, ,, haha ha , ,,

but i figured……. some content is better than no content at all!!

WARNINGS for blood, injury, violence, near-death, possible death……… mebbe spoileroonies if u haven’t finished the secret endings.. oh and also Rika..is there for one…. briefly…

Jumin

-powerful men like Jumin Han will always have enemies
-some are merely industry rivals who might bitch and moan and briefly fantasize about the assassination of such a man, but ultimately do noting but continue to compete, to vie for a presence in their fields
-and some are far more criminal in nature, and willing to do anything to get what they want
-and they don’t care who gets in their way
-Jumin is giving a press conference about a recent acquisition of yet another company into C&R’s fold
-MC is standing nearby, trying to keep from beaming, they’re so proud of their husband
-and they can’t keep their eyes off of him
-which is exactly why when a little red dot appears on him, on his red tie, they see it and are briefly annoyed
-whICH MOTHERFRICKER BROUGHT A LASER POINTER TO THIS??????
-but then as the little light moves minutely a cold dread settles in MC’s stomach
-the laser point is too still, and it’s red on on red, difficult to see
-MC’s heart beats a frantic rhythm and they can taste the tang of fear on the back of their tongue
-they glance up away from Jumin to the high buildings opposite the stage that’s been erected specifically for this event
-the moment feels like it takes an entire year
-but they see a flash of light, something glinting off of shiny metal
-it feels both unreal and terrifying
-powerful men like Jumin Han will always have enemies
-there are bodyguards around but they’re all facing the crowd of reporters, not Jumin
-they don’t see it
-they don’t see the light go completely still, like the shooter has finally decided on a good spot
-MC shouts
-and moves
-Jumin’s speech cuts off mid-word and his eyes are now on MC
-they both hit the ground but he hears MC take in a choked breath, he could hear and see the pain
-what
-what just.. happened?
-he wonders
-he can hear the gasps from the crowd, his security guards trying to keep the crowd back and get them to safety as others approach him and MC
-MC, who can’t seem to take in a proper breath
-Jumin calls their name as he sits the both of them back up
-their breathing sounds…. wet, raspy
-and Jumin can only get increasingly more worried as he comes to conclusions
-MC coughs and flecks of blood hit his pristine white shirt, and blend on his red tie
-he feels like his heart has stopped
-and he notes that the back of MC’s shirt is wet, and so are his hands
-he starts to shout orders
-Find the shooter
-Get an ambulance
-Round up the reporters for statements
-No one is allowed to leave
-bodyguards are surrounding the two, keeping them out of view
-Jumin can see that MC is fading p fast, about to pass out
-so he places his hands (bloody, a terrible idea, but it’s too late now) on their face, cupping their cheeks and jaw
-he implores them to stay with him
-his hands shake
-his voice shakes
-he is so, so scared
-what if he loses them?
-but they smile at him, and they weakly raise their hands to touch his
-“I don’t regret a thing, Jumin,” they tell him between shallow, rasping breaths
-he wishes they hadn’t said that
-it sounds like last words
-and he is desperate to make sure they aren’t

Seven

-he loves cars
-so the day that MC ends up pushing him out of the way of an incoming sports car and getting hit themself. ..
-to say he can’t look at his own cars, his babies, the same way again is not unfair
-and to say that he’s devastated is kind of an understatement
-he looks on from only yards away at where MC has landed in a crumpled heap
-his ass is on the pavement and relatively unharmed while MC…… .
-fuck he’s pretty sure limbs don’t bend that way
-they’re not supposed to look like that
-it starts out with an alarming sense of numbness, a feeling like this isn’t real
-Saeyoung gets to his feet, vaguely registers that his arm is bleeding from scraping the pavement when he landed, and that the owner of the car that just hit the love of his life is already out of their car and frantically calling emergency services
-“MC?” Saeyoung calls out as he approaches, but his own voice sounds distant to him
-dread builds rapidly and settles uneasily in Saeyoung’s gut the closer he gets
-his chest feels tighter and tighter and he can’t take deep breaths
-he feels sick
-but then he sees MC’s chest rise and fall
-and sounds come rushing into clarity for Saeyoung once more
-he can hear the driver that hit MC speaking over the phone
-he can hear other people gathering and muttering and exclaiming and the sounds of car doors opening and closing
-he can hear MC whimpering, saying his name
-Saeyoung is in front of them in an instant, on his knees and reaching for their grasping hand, the one on the arm that, thankfully, isn’t broken
-“Saeyoung.. Saeyoung… . it hurts I can't– I can’t move, S-Saeyoung”
-Saeyoung’s vision blurs with tears as he shushes MC, and his voice cracks repeatedly as he tries to reassure them and himself
-“Shh, shh it’s, it’ll be okay, M-MC.. aahhh, shit, fuck, it’ll be okay I s-swear. ..”
-in the hospital, waiting to hear any news is the worst
-Saeyoung is so used to knowing just about everything that’s going on and being able to easily find out if he doesn’t
-so this
-the not knowing
-is a new kind of agony
-he doesn’t know how MC is doing and he can’t find out without getting in the way and what if– what if their condition is too dire? what if they’re dying right now?
-he can’t stop his negative thoughts from spiraling, from getting worse and worse
-he works himself up into a panic attack
-MC could be dead and he wouldn’t know and he’s not sure……. how, or if, he could possibly keep going without them

Saeran

-a Mint Eye acolyte managed to escape capture the night everything ended
-the night Mint Eye was dismantled
-the night Paradise was lost
-the night their savior was taken from them
-and they are out for revenge
-they’re convinced that Saeran was a rat. that it’s his fault his fault his fault he has to pay
-they bided their time…. looking for Saeran, waiting for their moment to strike
-but Saeran is never alone
-and the acolyte gets. So. Frustrated.
-they just go for it.
-Saeran and MC are just out on a grocery run when it happens
-they haven’t even made it to the store when the acolyte blocks their path
-it’s late in the evening, at a time when MC knows there won’t be crowds since Saeran is pretty.. not. about crowds.
-so this is uh weird
-but Saeran recognizes the person blocking their path and is immediately on guard
-MC can see that Saeran is tense and it takes them a moment to see that this person’s eyes are the same color as Saeran’s
-that unnatural minty green-blue
-fuck
-except that “fuck” doesn’t even begin to cover it
-the whole thing is kind of a blur,, ,
-the acolyte charges Saeran (“TRAITOR!!! THE SAVIOR IS GONE BECAUSE OF YOU!!!!” they roar) and there’s a scuffle and MC tries to get this fucker off of Saeran but they pull a gun and there are no thoughts just action and MC
-gets
-in
-the
-way
-and the acolyte is laughing as MC hits the ground
-but it sounds more like gleeful shrieking
-Saeran sees the blood blooming on the back of MC’s sweater and he sees the laughing acolyte
-he fucking loses his shit
-he’s yelling and crying as he takes the acolyte down and he slams their head onto the concrete once.
-twice.
-a third time for good measure.
-they’re out.
-maybe dead.
-he doesn’t care
-he turns frantic eyes to MC who is bleeding and groaning and crying and whimpering on the ground
-fuck!
-“Shit shit sHIT! MC!!” Saeran’s voice cracks in his panic
-he kind of…. flutters around them, unsure
-until he remembers that pressure needs to be applied to the wound to keep MC from bleeding to death
-so he does that while also fumbling for his phone
-he doesn’t even think to call for an ambulance his mind is so jumbled
-he calls Saeyoung
-the twins are panicking, though Saeyoung might be handling things a lil better
-Saeyoung ends up remotely dispatching an ambulance to Saeran and MC’s location and then staying on the phone (Saeran puts him on speaker so he can use both hands and also so Saeyoung can talk to both him and MC)
-while they’re waiting for the ambulance (are those sirens in the distance already??) Saeran is like
-“MC why whatt he f u kc?? why did you do that why would you try to protect me like that???”
-he’s so mad and scared and very very confused and his head hurts (and it’s so hard to breathe, his chest aches) and the only consolation he has right now is Saeyoung telling them that the ambulance is close
-MC kind of grimaces while trying to smile (oh my god getting shot hurts so much?????? holy shit)
-“must rly like u i guess?” they kind of joke but are also dead fuckin serious
-MC now is not the time
-Saeran stares at them in disbelief for a moment, then he’s crying just that much more earnestly
-“you’re a fucking idiot
-he feels like. .. . he’s not worth MC’s time
-he’s not worth their effort
-he’s not worth their life
-god he loathes himself already and now this?? the person he maybe possibly has a crush on (his head’s still a mess but his heart beats so fast when they’re around sometimes and every time they smile he wants to smile back and that, right there, feels like a miracle) just got fucking shot???
-and it’s his fault, isn’t it?
-that they’re hurt
-that they’re bleeding
-that they’re fucking crying too
-(it should’ve been him, he thinks)

V

-it…….. happens like this:
-V doesn’t die in the Secret Ending 01
-MC sees the gun in Saeran’s hand, pointed at V
-V who is blind and can’t possibly evade such an attack in time on his own (can’t see it coming, he doesn’t even know the immediate danger he’s in)
-so they make their decision
-and then they’re in front of V, arms spread out
-and Saeran has already pulled the trigger before realizing what’s happened
-in this moment there is…. a lot of screaming going on
-Saeyoung. Rika. Vanderwood. even Saeran and V.
-MC is bleeding. profusely. V can tell that much at least as they both sink to the ground, him supporting them and calling their name
-but MC doesn’t respond, having gone limp in his arms
-Rika is trying to give out orders but,, her voice is a lil lost in the cacophony of Saeyoung and Saeran yelling at each other and to MC
-Vanderwood manages to get the gun away from Saeran in the commotion
-Saeran is……. distraught for many reasons.. one of which being that he hadn’t intended to kill MC at all
-he’d just wanted to take them to Paradise
-things get louder when Jumin and his security team finally arrive
-arrests are made. Mint Eye disciples and Rika and Saeran are subdued
-Saeyoung and V and Vanderwood are shouting about getting MC (and Saeyoung) medical attention
-V’s hand are red and his clothes are damp and sticky
-MC’s blood is on his hands literally and metaphorically and he is horrified
-his heart is aching, his hands are shaking, and it is all too much and he hates himself he hates himself
-it’s so,, visceral a feeling
-it’s hard to breathe
-V clutches desperately at MC’s hand the entire helicopter ride to the hospital, hoping that they’ll wake up and clutch back
-they don’t.
-the blood on V’s clothes is dry by the time MC finally wakes up in the hospital
-the first thing they notice after getting their bearings is that the room is probably too big for one person to be staying in, but that’s how it is
-the second thing they notice is V asleep in a sofa chair, the kind that’s provided in rooms where the patient is long-term
-the third thing is the sound of incoming footsteps
-there’s a soft knock at the door before it opens
-it’s Jumin with a bundle of what looks like clean clothes in his arms
-V shifts in the chair, groggy but now awake
-MC watches V stand and gingerly stretch as he turns toward the door
-“Jumin?” V asks softly, as if afraid to wake MC
-but Jumin isn’t looking at V, and has frozen halfway to the blind man
-he redirects his course toward the hospital bed “MC. You’re awake.” he doesn’t shout but it’s a very near thing
-V turns so fast he almost loses his footing
-he stumbles in his haste to get to MC’s side
-“MC!”
-he does shout
-he’s not wearing his shades so MC can see how wide open his eyes are
-MC’s throat is dry so when they speak it comes out as a croak
-“Hey, V. Jumin.”
-but they are smiling
-and V can hear it
-and somehow that hurts him even more

Confused Love

They told me it would get better, when it all happend

I knew that was true

They told me the pain would subside

And I knew that as well

I knew and accept your reasons

In fact I knew everything I was being told

But the funny thing is, like a dog

Love doesn’t know

Love doesn’t know why you stopped calling

It doesn’t know why I don’t feel you anymore

Love doesn’t know why there is a sudden cold

And it doesn’t know why anything happened

Maybe that’s why it hurts so god damn much

Because no matter how much I know, or how much I learn

Love won’t know why you left

And love won’t know how to stop loving