god take my life away

I went into my room and just stood there.
So many memories that I cannot forget.
Especially when I’m in HERE.
I am suffocating in sadness,
it’s filling my lungs.
I go to the box and take out the note.
That I’ve been too afraid to look at.
“I love you so much. Im so happy I met you. I can’t wait for the day when we start a family.”
Tears spilling down my face,
I throw the note on the floor.
I start knocking all my books off the table.
I scream.
I start throwing things at the wall.
I am broken,
but angry.
I lay on my bed and stare at the ceiling.
“Dear GOD, please take this pain away.” I whisper
—  Chapters from my life
God (for London 22/3/17)

Hey you,
Boy, girl.
Man, woman.
I do not know you
You do not know me
You believe in your God
Others believe in a different God
I believe in no God
Others might say your God
is the wrong God
You believe your God
is the only God
Pray to your Gods if you wish
I don’t give a shit about any God
But that’s cool as
We are free
Free to believe what we wish
We are not
You want to kill me
In the name of your God
You want to take away the thing you say God gave me
You want to take away my life
Because I don’t believe in your God
God created earth
God created all life
So why would God
want one of his creations
to take the life he gave?
If this is what the Gods do
Play with their creations
Then I’m glad I believe in no God
And if I’m wrong
And when I die
I come face to face with a God
I will just say
“You sick bastard”


Day Eight || Bias Singing 

I could honest to god spend the rest of my life watching Jongdae singing. It takes my breath away to see how he always manages to convey the emotion of whatever hes singing so effortlessly and his voice is so angelic and beautiful. 
(Click on the first photo for a link to Chen’s performance of
Uprising that that gif is from, the second one for a link to his performance of When I was… When You Were… with f(x)’s Krystal, the one after that for a link to him singing Nothing Better -its not the exact video that gif came from but it was filmed at the same time and I couldn’t find a good quality version of the one the gif is from - and the last photo for a link to the It’s Okay, Thats Love OST track Best Luck that he recorded) 

i announced today on twitter that i’ll be releasing a new ep soon, you can check out the album cover right here. i was pretty excited about the whole thing. that is, until my girlfriend told me that she’s already getting anonymous messages on tumblr because of it. like, mean ones! hurtful ones!! SO, because the world is full of awful shitty little babies, i guess i have to talk about the release in detail

i have an album coming out soon called four songs for losing you. the songs were written in the summer and fall of 2014 but i waited an entire year to finish and release them out of respect for the person that it’s about. i wanted to give it time, and to make sure that we had both moved on and were in stable relationships before i made the songs public. i wanted to make sure that we were both in a happier place before i even considered benefiting off of something so personal.

why is that such a difficult thing to understand? not to mention the fact that songwriting doesn’t always work like it does in movies and on tv. it isn’t so relevant and in the moment. from writing, to rehearsing, recording, mixing, mastering, then finally releasing. by the time you hear a song for the first time, it’s already so old and played out to the artist. plus, i can write a song about something that happened ten years ago and it would still make sense and be personal. emotions can be valid without being topical. the entirety of i clung to you and sleep were recorded while i was in a four year relationship. please understand that. 

above anything else, if you have any complaints or criticism about my career please take them up with me and leave my girlfriend out of it.


eunhyukee44: 2008.7.9. I still remember the first time I met Japanese fans in Budokan. After that (we had) numerous tours and (from) the time we met, we spent 7 years together and now (I have to say) temporary goodbye on my last stage in Japan, (and the fact that) I can be together with everyone on such a big and cool place like this, I was really happy. Even though I did not fulfill all my activities to match what everyone wanted; although I am to be blamed for my poor Japanese language standard, making it not easy to always truly deliver what our hearts (want to say); but because all the fans are always gazing at us warming, supporting us, loving us, I was able to grow like this. I was to give thanks once again. Although I will not be able to see (everyone) for a while, please anticipate my healthy and bright image and always think of me wherever you are. Thank you. I love you. E.L.F JAPAN I love you。