I wish I would’ve known
That my whole world would have came crumbling down…
That my soul would be shattered into a million pieces…
That the love of my life turned out to be a lie.
If only my eyes were as open as my heart
And if I would have listened to intuition
Maybe I wouldn’t be in this position?
Last night I slept for 17 hours.
And in that time, I tossed… I turned.
Never once looked at the clock but, I prayed and asked God to take my life away.
Then, I woke up.
Then I realized,
It wasn’t the end of my life
Just, the end of a thing that I had hope in.
Here I am today, mourning the loss of my hurt feelings…
I broke up with my new boyfriend because I can’t take it any
longer. I know that he loves me so much and he will do anything just to make me
happy. But I don’t want to hurt him anymore. That boy belongs to someone else,
someone better than me. He begged for me
to stay, did a lot of promises but I still choose to break his heart, if only
he can understand how hard it is to see him crying. I killed a part of him
who’s willing to sacrifice just to capture my heart.
They say I’m blinded by my past. But they didn’t know that
it’s not easy to forget someone who made a big change in your life. I know, I
know… time passes so fast and here I am, still searching for you. No one knows
the history between us. No one knows how much effect have you done that I still
can’t move on until this very day.
I remembered the day we first met. I was a transferred
student and I don’t know how to make new friends. You waved at me and
smiled. My cheeks turned red, and waved
back at you. It’s one of the happiest days of my life, don’t you believe it?
Every time I looked back at the past, remembering you has never been wrong.
Everyone at school loves you, including me, who stalks you a
lot. Funny that you didn’t catch me staring at you. Or we can say that you
notice me but you don’t mind at all. You’re smart and kind, and let’s not
forget to add that you’re pretty handsome. You don’t talk much, but your eyes
say it all. If I don’t stop staring at it, I will definitely melt. And I don’t know what kind of sorcery did you
use, but I’m totally into you.
By simply looking at you makes me happy - with every glance
makes my heart wander. You’re not fully aware of what kind of magic you used on
me, but you changed my world in a whole new level. The moment I saw you I knew
that you are special. You even surpass that hypothesis because you made me love
you. You made fall deeply in love with you. And I’m glad that it actually
happened because I can’t imagine my life without you.
One day you told me, you loved me too. And the reason why
you waved at me on the first day of school is because you want me to be yours.
I laughed at the sudden confession because I don’t know if you’re making fun of
me. I’m not remarkable, unique or whatever, but the thought that you want me to
be yours feels so right. You hold my
hand, and kneel in front of me.
“Let’s start again, leave all your worries behind. Let me
love you for the rest of our lives.”
Tears started falling into my eyes and the happiness within
our hearts was limitless. From that moment on, we both promised that will never
let go of each other and that no matter how hard life is will stand tall and we
will continue to fight for our love.
I treasured every day we spent together. No time was ever
wasted. You show me the true meaning of living your life in the fullest. You
made me the luckiest girl on earth and I’m happy that I found you. The world
constantly changes every day, but my love for you will never wilt. The sun will
continue to shine and no storms can destroy us.
But every story has an ending and I never thought that this
day will come. I recalled the seconds, minutes, hours and days we’ve been
together before you gave up your last breath. It was painful seeing you in that
bed, in that death bed that separated us. We made a pact, right? But you leave
I know that it’s not really your intention to hurt me, but
you still did and I hate you for that. I love you so much that it still hurts
‘til this day. It’s been 5 years since you left, but the memories didn’t fade
away. I can still remember the way you look after me. I can still feel the warm
embrace and how soft your lips were. I remembered everything, every single
thing about you.
Sorry that I still can’t fulfill your last words. I don’t
know if I can love someone else. Sorry if sometimes I asked God to take my life
away so I can be with you now. Sorry for being so heartless. If you’re still
alive, for sure you’ll get mad at me. But a promise is still a promise. I’ll
try again, okay? For you, I will.
I love you so much and I miss you. No one can ever replace
you. I will never forget you.
wait catsuggest is a terf? why must god take away all the pure things in my life
Don’t worry. All cats are actually anti-terf
(Seriously tho there’s that one post about the guy going on t and his cat adjusting its meow to be lower to fit his transitioning voice: cats legit accept us)
I could honest to god spend the rest of my life watching Jongdae singing. It takes my breath away to see how he always manages to convey the emotion of whatever hes singing so effortlessly and his voice is so angelic and beautiful. (Click on the first photo for a link to Chen’s performance of Uprising that that gif is from, the second one for a link to his performance of When I was… When You Were… with f(x)’s Krystal, the one after that for a link to him singing Nothing Better -its not the exact video that gif came from but it was filmed at the same time and I couldn’t find a good quality version of the one the gif is from -and the last photo for a link to the It’s Okay, Thats Love OST track Best Luck that he recorded)
I went into my room and just stood there.
So many memories that I cannot forget.
Especially when I’m in HERE.
I am suffocating in sadness,
it’s filling my lungs.
I go to the box and take out the note.
That I’ve been too afraid to look at.
“I love you so much. Im so happy I met you. I can’t wait for the day when we start a family.”
Tears spilling down my face,
I throw the note on the floor.
I start knocking all my books off the table.
I start throwing things at the wall.
I am broken,
I lay on my bed and stare at the ceiling.
“Dear GOD, please take this pain away.” I whisper
A/N: This was inspired from the song Lost Ones by J. Cole. A LOT of the lines are used in this imagine, I worded them a little different though, I really recommend you watch the music video - I HOPE YOU ENJOY EVEN THOUGH THIS IS GONNA BE TERRIBLE BC ITS MY FIRST IMAGINE
Tears slid down her face while she screamed at me. “You got me pregnant Nate! It’s your child too, not just mine. There’s a life growing inside of me! You can’t leave.” She whispered that last part.
"Babe look, I really love you, but we’re not ready -“
“Nate -” She interrupted.
“Let me finish,” I looked at her with pleading eyes and she rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest.
“Think about it Y/N, how are we gonna raise a kid by ourselves? Shit, we’re still kids ourselves! We’re barely over 20, where the hell are we gonna live? Where we gonna get the money? As your baby bump grows, you’re gonna need more help and I can’t afford to miss work at the studio. We’re not financially stable to handle so many responsibilities. Baby, you gotta think about that shit too. I refuse to bring my girl or boy in this world when I got nothing to give them.“
She stared at me in disbelief.
“Are you serious right now Nate? You got nothing to give to your child? What about love? We may not be financially stable, but we got something. You make enough money to support a little and plus my job too. I’m sure the boys will help a little too. We can get an apartment, of course it won’t be luxurious but there’ll be a roof over our heads. I can get a better job, I’ll do anything to support our child Nate!” She was sobbing at this point.
“Y/N …… Why don’t you just get an abortion?” She scoffed.
“I can’t believe you got the fucking nerve to talk to me about aborting. I’d like to have you know that this is my body so don’t think you’re gonna force shit.” After a moment of silence she said, “I should of seen this coming.” I suddenly got confused. “What do you mean you saw this coming? Saw what coming?“
"You see, I know how you act, you’re so typical Nate. You told me you love me, but you actually don’t, you’re just like every other fuckboy out there who say that they loved me but you only said that because you only wanted sex. All this time that’s all I ever was. Just a fuck. You knew all the right things to say and I was dumb enough to fall for it, now I’m pregnant and you don’t wanna be involved. Shit, you wanna take my child’s life away? You’re not God. There’s a life growing in my stomach and if you don’t wanna wife me? Fine. You don’t want the child? Fine. But regardless, I’m gonna keep it and I’m gonna love it. I’ll do this shit by my fucking self. My mom raised me with no help of a man so I can do this without you too.” I didn’t know what to say.
“Remember what you used to say about your father Nate? You used to say that "he ain’t shit” and that he’s a coward because he left your mom when you were born. You said he needed to step his shit up and all this other crap, but here you go doing the same exact shit!“ I still stayed quiet and just stared at her. I saw the pain in her eyes and I knew she wanted me to stay with her. I knew she didn’t want me to leave but I have to, we can’t do this. I can’t do this. My life is just starting. I can’t be responsible for another human life when I can’t even be responsible for my own.
"Y/N …..” I still couldn’t find the words! Why? “Nate” she sobbed “Just leave” My heart sunk down to my stomach. “So what? These 10 months are just gonna go to waste?” She nodded slowly. “I guess so because you don’t wanna grow the fuck up and be a man.” I walked to the door and opened it, before I walked out I turned to look at her. Tears filled my eyes as I said “Goodbye Y/N. I wish you the best of luck.” And walked out. What did I just do?
2008.7.9. I still remember the first time I met Japanese fans in Budokan. After that (we had) numerous tours and (from) the time we met, we spent 7 years together and now (I have to say) temporary goodbye on my last stage in Japan, (and the fact that) I can be together with everyone on such a big and cool place like this, I was really happy. Even though I did not fulfill all my activities to match what everyone wanted; although I am to be blamed for my poor Japanese language standard, making it not easy to always truly deliver what our hearts (want to say); but because all the fans are always gazing at us warming, supporting us, loving us, I was able to grow like this. I was to give thanks once again. Although I will not be able to see (everyone) for a while, please anticipate my healthy and bright image and always think of me wherever you are. Thank you. I love you. E.L.F JAPAN I love you。
Believers in Niger Praise God In Burned Out Church Day After it was Attacked… Afflictions may kill us—but they cannot hurt us; they may take away my life—but they cannot take away my God, my Christ, my crown. - THOMAS BROOKS..