you and jungkook met through your mutual friend jimin when both of them were just trainees.
it would first start because both of you liked making fun of jin, you guys still do.
both of you would be very competitive and make small bets about every stupid little thing.
“5 bucks says i can fit more straws in my mouth than you.”
“jungkook, that is the stupidest thing you’ve ever said. i, of course, can fit more in my mouth than you.”
both of you began to shove straws in your mouth, but one hits the back of his throat, making him spit them all out on the floor. causing you to laugh and all of yours fall out too.
suga would walk in, look at jungkook coughing, you laughing your head off, all of the straws in the floor and just walk away, not wanting to know what the fuck just happened.
both of you would be mischievous little shits and cause little fights between the other members.
“jin hyung, not that me and y/n heard anything, but jimin said that he is stealing eatjin and turning it into eatjimin.”
“WHAT?! that is my show, that little fucker.”
going out together for breakfast was a regular thing, you guys wouldn’t even need the menu at some point, just always getting the same thing over and over again.
taking small naps together would happen at times, too. your head would be on his chest, and his arms wrapped around your fragile body.
the boys would always take pictures of you guys sleeping and tease you about it later. both of you wouldn’t care about the teasing but would about the fact that they were taking pictures of you and being creeps.
SO MANY INSIDE JOKES BETWEEN YOU GUYS
YOU AND JUNGKOOK WOULD HAVE THIS THING WHERE YOU WOULD JUST MAKE THESE WEIRD NOISES ALL THE TIME AND THE BOYS WOULD WANT TO KILL BOTH OF YOU
"WOULD YOU GUYS STOP OH MY GOD"
making fun of eachother would be an absolute
nicknames would also be necessary.
"hey bunny teeth come here!“
"what’s up kid?“
you guys told eachother everything. except one little thing that happened between you and taehyung. you guys were playing truth and dare and he got dared to kiss you. it didn’t mean anything, but you guys swore you would never tell jungkook
one day jungkook would call you early in the morning, asking you if you wanted to walk around the city with him.
you would say no but he would beg and beg you to, finally making you get up and meet him at a park.
you guys would walk everywhere, just talking and having the usual fun between you two.
it would become mid afternoon quickly, you guys deciding to walk to your apartment and hang out there for a while.
soon, jungkook would leave, needing to go back to the dorm and talk with the boys about work.
hugging you goodbye, he left, making you realize how tired you actually were.
you would crawl into bed and pass out for a few hours, only being woke up by your phone ringing.
4 missed calls from lil kookie
6 messages frrom lil kookie
i’m drunk and i hate you
pick up your phone
i never want to see you again
i can’t believe you kissed my best friend
i have always loved you and this is how you treat me
Author’s Note: You ever forget that you’re a fanfic writer then you write a fic so bad you remember how much of a hack you are? Yeah welcome to my fic :’D
dom!jungkook- fuckboi!jungkook- fuckbuddy relationship- dirty talk- thigh riding mention because damn even I am not immune to his thighs- inspired by Sia’s song and part of the song drabble game. You can find links to the rest of them on my masterlist
There he was with his hands up some girl’s skirt, grinding on her like he was trying to fuck her through their clothes, the fucking pig. You huff and turn to your friend who gives you an exasperated look, “___, just go and grab him by the dick and tell him he can’t fucking do that.”
“He can do whatever the fuck he wants to do, even if that is a bleach blonde bitch with a tan that makes her look like an Oompa Loompa.” That was pretty low, you admit. It wasn’t the girl’s fault that Jungkook had chosen her for the night. But seriously, there was a limit to tanning, this was just harmful to the eyes.
“No, he can’t because you’re together.” Your friend, Hwasa, sounds pretty fed up with you.
“No, we’re not. We’re just fuck buddies and we agreed that we’re not exclusive right from the start.” Why wasn’t she understanding this? You’d explained it to her a thousand times.
“I don’t care what bullshit you told each other. All I care about is what I see, and that is two idiots constantly doing all they can to piss each other off because they can’t communicate like adults.”
“What are you even talking about? Jungkook is not trying to piss me off. He’s just being himself. Which is admittedly annoying in and of itself but you know…”
“Then why did he do nothing the past three days but play video games while you were off galavanting with Jin, only to start making out with some girl the minute you make an appearance?”
“He did?” You asked surprised, only to check yourself back and shrug it off. “I don’t know, he must have just not felt like it.”
“Oh my god, save me from these two idiots.” Hwasa cries then takes you by the shoulder and starts shaking you, “He’s fucking jealous because you took Jin to meet your family and not him so he’s trying to piss you off. Why? Because he likes you. And you’re pissed off. Why? Because you like him. Now can you get that through your thick skull or do I have to beat it into you?”
Man, you’ve never seen the normally so cool and chic girl lose her temper like that. “He likes me?” You ask slowly, and she nods.
“And I like him?” You point a finger to yourself, enunciating every word like you were speaking to someone who didn’t understand your language.
You look towards Jungkook and for a second the unrecognizable source of your anger with him rears its ugly head and it looked an awful lot like jealousy… No, that’s not possible. You’re just too easily persuaded with Hwasa’s strong conviction under the influence of the alcohol. The only emotion you felt towards the tall arrogant asshole that could be described as loving is loving to hate him. “Don’t be ridiculous.” You dismiss her. “I know how I feel towards Jungkook and that’s pure and unadulterated annoyance, nothing more.”
“Then why don’t you break up with him?”
“If he really does nothing more than annoy you then why don’t you break up with him and save yourself the trouble?” She challenges, seeming pleased with herself.
“Because he’s fucking hot.” You say as if that’s common sense, completely ignoring her implication that you’re dating him in the first place.
“There are dozens of hot guys in this college, even hotter than him. Take Namjoon for example, he’s hot AND smart, and he knows how to treat a girl right. Not like that douchebag.”
“Yeah, Namjoon is pretty smokin’ but have you considered that I like fucking Jungkook because he’s an asshole? College fucking sucks and it’s too stressful for me. I need something to let the frustration out on and that’s Jungkook. He takes whatever I give him and I take his frustration too. It’s like a symbiotic relationship. Primitive attraction. I can’t find that in anyone else, and if I did he’d be just like Jungkook because that’s the entire premise.” You take a deep breath then continue, “And I don’t like him and he doesn’t like me, this is just a stupid thing to tide us over until college is over and we can find people we’ll actually want to treat right. God help whatever unlucky girl he ends up with.” You chuckle but Hwasa doesn’t share your amusement.
Eventually, she relents, “Fine, I just hope you know what you’re doing.”
“I am,” You assure her. “Now if you don’t mind, I’m going to go home. This place stinks and I’m all sweaty, and the view doesn’t exactly inspire my lunch to stay inside my stomach.” You look pointedly towards Jungkook who you find looking back at you smugly. You roll your eyes at him then turn back towards your friend. “I’ll go take a shower and sleep.”
You step out of the shower, ready to put on your comfiest PJs and make a cocoon for yourself out of your cozy covers, when you’re met with the sight of Jungkook sitting on your bed, and tapping his foot impatiently.
Once he sees you, he gets up and pins you against the back of the door you were still standing by with a hungry kiss. “You’re late.” He states.
“Huh?” You ask, still dazed by his sudden appearance and the intense kiss.
“You said you’ll come back after two days. You were gone for three.”
“Oh, that.” You furrow your eyebrows, wondering why he was asking you about that when you pressed up against him with just a towel covering your body.
“My mum was so charmed by Jin that she insisted we stay another day. I swear, that guy doesn’t know how to turn it down.” You laugh, oblivious to the glare on Jungkook’s face, “But oh well, at least she bought the whole spiel of him being you.”
When you’d started your fuckbuddy relationship with Jungkook, you weren’t careful about not mentioning him to your mum. So whenever she called you, you’d tell her you were doing this or that with Jungkook. You were spending such a huge amount of time with him –when you weren’t fucking, Jungkook could put on an okay impression of a decent human being, and he was pretty funny too– that your mum presumed he was your boyfriend.
You tried lying and saying that he’s just a friend but she wouldn’t have it so you ended up just agreeing that he was, in fact, your boyfriend. You just didn’t have the heart to tell your sweet, loving mum that Jungkook was just the dude who put his penis in her daughter on the daily, sometimes more than once.
It went fine until the holidays came around and your mother demanded that she finally meet this Jungkook who has been seeing her daughter for so long. Obviously, you never would, in a million years, let them meet. Jungkook was too crass and misbehaved. You didn’t want to give your mother a heart attack yet, so you convinced Jin, a dear friend of yours, to go in Jungkook’s place and pretend to be him. To which he so kindly agreed.
Jin was an instant hit at the family reunion. He was loved so much that he was invited to stay over for a longer time, which he again agreed to because Jin is an attention-loving whore and he’d never turn down an opportunity for people to praise him. You would have had to stay more if you didn’t chew Jin’s ear off and gave him a well-delivered punch to the gut. The following day, he suddenly remembered that your classes start early and he told your mum that you needed to leave. She was disappointed, more than she ever was when you were visiting alone, but she’ll live.
“I don’t know why he needed to pretend to be your boyfriend when I’m not.”
“You know why.” You glare at him.
“Because your lovely mother would drop dead if she knew the real nature of our relationship? If she knew the filthy things I do to you. The filthy things you beg me to do to you.” He smirks, grinding against you.
“Yes, that’s exactly why.” You moan, letting your head fall back against the door and enjoying the friction.
“You could’ve just taken me, you know. But I guess you wouldn’t have been able to be in the same room as me without begging me to finger you under the table.” He trails kisses down your neck, harsh and painful, but all the more delicious.
“Perhaps. Or maybe you wouldn’t have been able to keep in your moans while I fucked you, making the entire house hear you telling me how my pussy is the tightest you’ve ever had and how much you can’t get enough of it.” You parrot back the words he told you the night before you left.
He groans, suddenly throwing off your towel and pressing a finger against your slit, “Brave words, little girl, but look how you’re already so wet for me.”
“And you’re telling me if I go down on my knees and unzip your overly tight jeans I won’t find your cock red and twitching?” You say through clenched teeth, doing exactly that and taking his pants and boxers off. Jungkook doesn’t disappoint, you find him already hard and ready.
“Well, as long as you’re down there why don’t you shut up and show me what that sharp mouth of yours was really made for? And don’t tease.” He warns, making short work of his shirt then throwing it away, leaving you both completely naked.
“Hmm, I don’t know. You completely ignored my texts earlier and chose to continue feeling up that blondie. Why should I give you what you want now?” You lightly trail your index finger up and down his length.
“You can’t expect me to drop everything I’m doing the second your highness decides to come back. You’re good, baby, but you’re not that good.” He grips his cock and circles the head of it around the shape of your lips, mesmerized by the way the softness of your lips give way underneath him. Your tongue peeks out and curls around his head, sucking on it and stopping his movement.
You let his dick go out of your mouth with a pop that had him hunching over, his shadow engulfing you. “Is that why you were waiting so patiently for me a few minutes ago like a good boy?” His cocky smile falls and you smirk triumphantly, knowing you had him. “She must not have been any good at all to have you running back to me so soon. Are you losing your touch, Kookie?”
“Oh, but she was great baby. The most submissive little thing. She was prepared to do anything I wanted. She would’ve done anything to please me. But that’s boring. You know I like a challenge. I prefer your brand of submissiveness. It’s much more satisfying getting a stuck up and spoiled bitch like you to swallow her pride and beg for my dick. I love breaking you down, baby.” Jungkook finishes you off cleanly. He always found a way to do that. “Now shut up and suck me off.”
He’s being entirely too cocky, but with a dick like that, he has every right to be. That doesn’t stop you from continuing to tease him though, knowing that soon enough he’d take the lead anyway and he never goes soft on you. You use your tongue to follow all the lines on his dick, paying special attention to the groove separating the head from the shaft, never once taking him in your mouth like he wants you to.
“You really want to be punished today, don’t you?” He tugs harshly on your hair, pulling your head back and using his other hand to slap his cock against your cheek a few times. “Answer me.”
“Yes, sir, punish me real good.” You say it tauntingly, but it gets to him anyway, and he handles you even more roughly to show you he deserves the title.
“Open up your mouth and don’t you dare close it until I’m done using it. I don’t care if you have to breathe or if you’re fucking choking, you’ll take it like the good girl you are. Understood?”
“Yes, sir.” You rush to say, pushing your tongue out to get him to fuck your mouth already. That doesn’t please him and he gives another harsh tug on your hair that makes tears sting your eyes, “At least try to pretend you’re not such a slut.” He sneers, but you know he loves it.
You pull your tongue back into your mouth and give him your biggest puppy eyes, and finally, finally, he pushes his cock inside, sticking to shallow staccato thrusts that hit the back of your throat for just a split second each time. You had missed the weight of him on your tongue so you close your eyes and moan around him, like the girls in those over the top chocolate commercials, except unlike them, you weren’t exaggerating your pleasure.
But your moan soon turns to multiple impatient ones when Jungkook keeps up his shallow, sparse thrusts. “What is it? Does baby girl want more?”
You moan out a yes, not daring nor wanting to pull your mouth off of him in order to vocalize your need better. “Do you think you deserve it? Lying to me and being gone for so long? How do you think I’m supposed to take care of my needs when my little cum bitch isn’t around?”
You thought the question was rhetorical so just give him another pleading moan but he takes his cock out of your mouth and says, “Answer me.”
“Uh…fuck other g-girls?” Was that the right answer? You weren’t sure what he wanted you to say, and you didn’t know why your own answer annoyed you so much.
“I could have, but where would I find someone like you?” You feel yourself involuntarily smiling, but then he continues, “I don’t think I’ve ever met a girl as perverted as you, or nearly as sex-crazed. You let me do things to you I only imagined. That’s you, ready to be fucked whenever and wherever I want.” He praises, or at least that’s what you think he intended with the double edged words.
“There are some seriously fucked up girls out there, and they all would throw themselves into my bed ass first if I so much as lifted a finger in their direction, but I don’t know if they’d ever compare to you.” He caresses your cheek and looks down at you in a mock loving way, and for some reason that makes you feel a little bit sick.
Slapping his hand away, you snap. “Why don’t you break up with me and find out then?”
You don’t know why you were so upset over his words. You don’t mind dirty talk at all, in fact, you loved it. He could always make you wet with just a few words from him, but why did he have to keep bragging about other girls like a peacock brandishing his tail? You already knew all of this but so what? You could have any guy you wanted too.
Like you did earlier this night, he completely brushes over the dating part and simply shrugs, “Too much work.”
Finally, he shuts up and thrusts back into you, this time deep enough to make you choke. Normally you’d do better than that but slight interruption put you off guard, but you quickly get back into it.
You were always hyper aware of Jungkook’s dick whenever you deep throated him. You felt every little twitch it made and tasted even the slightest bit of precum that it produced so you knew just what to do to make it feel exponentially better for him. You swallowed around him when you felt it would affect him the most and used your tongue when he needed it.
Jungkook wasn’t frugal with the sounds he made, letting out moans and grunts each time you did something he particularly liked, praising you for being so good for him. “Shit, I fucking love your mouth baby.” He wraps a hand loosely around your throat, feeling the bulge inside it every time his cock slides in. “I love hearing you gag around my cock. Such a good little slut, taking it all for me.”
He never was the gentlest lover but you thought that he was going extra hard today. Each time he bottomed out, he would stay a second with his lower abdomen pressed against your nose, as if he was purposefully trying to make you lose your breath so he’d punish you more.
But you were too horny for whatever he had in mind and you were in no mood for any further strange questions from him so you set your mind to making him bow out before you did. Trailing a hand between his spread legs, you press your thumb against the area between his balls and his asshole and rubbed him there just the way you knew he liked.
The effect on him is instant, he lets out a growl and starts assaulting your mouth with his thrusts for a few seconds, the saliva that drooled down your chin making long strings between your mouth and his abdomen every time he tugged your head back, before breaking altogether when he tears himself away from you. He doesn’t give you time to regain your breath before the hand around your throat tightens drastically, preventing you from sucking in the much-needed air, “Did I tell you you can do that?”
“No,” You whimper, the tears that have been stinging your eyes for some time finally break free and start falling in streams down your cheeks. You claw at his hand but it’s no use. He was too strong for you. He wasn’t trying to kill you, he still allowed you enough air to stay alive but not enough to stop the burning in your lungs.
“Then why did you do it?”
“I’m…sorry… sir.” You squeak out the words separately. The sentence too large to come out fully through your tight airways.
He turns around and flings you onto the bed. “Are you going to follow orders or do I have to get out the whips and shackles.”
You shudder at that. Jungkook didn’t much like using toys. He preferred to use his own body. He said it made him feel everything more intensely, but he wasn’t against using them when he really needed to, and you never want to make him need to.
“No, sir, I’ll be good, sir. Forgive me.” You use the back of your hand to wipe your mouth clean and look down demurely.
“Lie down and spread your legs.”
You follow his orders instantly, spreading your legs as far as they’ll go but apparently that wasn’t enough for him because he forcefully spreads them just a little wider, making it a little painful. A fact you know wasn’t lost on him.
The soft way he kisses your inner thighs may seem like an attempt to lessen the pain to anyone looking on but you know he was only doing it to torture you more, especially that he can definitely see and smell how aroused you were.
When he moves his lips to your pussy, things don’t get any better. He kisses and licks between your legs like it was a cone of ice cream, the objective was to capture any escaping juice and not to bring you any pleasure.
You’re left with nothing to do than to repeat your earlier pleads of sorrow, hoping he’d take pity on you and start eating you out properly, but he never does. It’s stupid of you to think that taking matters into your hand and touching your breasts to give you some sort of relief would go unnoticed because even if Jungkook had his eyes closed, he was still so acutely aware of your sounds that he noticed the difference your touches made.
You’re not given a second to process things before he’s flipped you on your stomach, quickly grabbing a scarf that was thrown haphazardly on the floor to tie your hands to the metal bars of the headboard.
“You don’t even deserve something this soft. I’d rather have your wrists in shackles that would dig red bloody lines into your skin to teach you the consequences of being such a bad girl. But that can wait for now.” He grits out.
You should have anticipated the first blow that hit your ass, and yet you didn’t. You never do. Jungkook’s hands, those large sexy hands that you love so much are the same ones now torturing you. He doesn’t hold back, fully intending to make you cry again and beg for his forgiveness.
You try to hold back, knowing that if you stop him now, the frustration he was hitting you with would only be transferred to his fucking, and you were sure your pussy couldn’t take the abuse. You’re not sure how many times he’s hit you already, alternating between hitting the same spots to intensify the pain and finding new spots to spread it.
Maybe you had braved out thirty counts, maybe your knees gave out after five, but give out they did, and you were sobbing for him to stop every time he hooked a hand under your waist and pulled your ass up to strike you again.
“I’m so sorry… I’ll never be bad again… I’ll listen to everything you tell me to do… I’ll let you fuck me in front of the whole college if you want… just please sir, my ass can’t take any more.” You sob hysterically, fully ready to follow through on every word just to make him stop but he still doesn’t.
“Jungkookie, p-please.” You say the magic word and he stops. You don’t know what is it about the simple nickname that he loves so much, but you’ve come to realize that you can use it whenever things get too intense to make him calm down, during sex or even in real life. You had a safe word, sure, but despite the pain, things weren’t yet too much for you to make you say it. You were just so turned on from the spanking and the teasing that you couldn’t take anymore.
“Should I go and leave you like this? In tears yet so horny you’d ride my thigh to get off if I told you to do it.” You blush, despite the hundred humiliating things Jungkook got you to do for him when he got you horny enough, that would still be one of the most embarrassing ones.
You’d been so turned on one day from Jungkook’s endless teasing but unfortunately for you, you were in a movie theatre watching some superhero flick with some friends from college so you couldn’t do anything about it. Or rather Jungkook didn’t want to do anything about it. Somehow through the course of the movie, you found yourself sitting on his lap, grinding yourself against his thigh to get any sort of friction when Jungkook had the bright idea that you use his thigh to get off. He assured you that it was perfectly fine and that you were seated far enough in the back and away from everyone even your friends, so no one would find out. You were too far gone to think it through enough, and you’d always found his thighs particularly sexy so you listened to him, especially after he promised you he’d let you take control that night if you did it.
Surprisingly it wasn’t hard to reach your orgasm. You had slipped your panties off, and the rough material of his jeans gave the perfect amount of friction over his steel thighs. He had talked you through it with a broken, raspy voice and words seemingly whispered to him by the devil. It was one of the best orgasms of your life, and you would have repeated the action countless times if it weren’t for what happened after the movie ended.
You arousal had apparently left a big ass dark spot on his jeans, and when asked about it by your friends, he gave a casual reply that had you running back to your dorm in embarrassment and not showing your face to anyone for a week straight.
“Oh, that’s from ___. She couldn’t control herself so I let her use my thighs to get off.”
Everyone was stunned, except Taehyung who asked, “And did it work? Did you get off on his thighs?”
You didn’t know if he was saying that to embarrass you further or because he really wanted to know. You saw a hint of something dark in his eyes but you didn’t stick around long enough to find out what it was because you had run away after snapping back, “No, he was talking too much and I couldn’t properly focus on Tom Hiddleston and imagine it was his thigh like I was trying to do.”
That night was the origin of the persisting rumor that you two were an item. The one you constantly denied and that Jungkook kept confirming just to annoy you.
You were torn from your dark memories by the feel of Jungkook’s dick sliding back and forth along your entrance. “Are you ignoring me, baby girl? You sure you want to do that?” He threatens and your words stumble over themselves in a rush to get out of your mouth.
“No, sir, I would never! Please, please, fuck me, please. I wouldn’t be able to handle it if you left me like this. Please, sir.”
Jungkook relents, pushing all the way into you with one thrust. The bastard didn’t even prep you beforehand. Luckily, you were used to the abuse. Sometimes Jungkook would prep you extensively before fucking you, other times he did it like this. It was part of the punishment, and you’d learned to like it.
“Is there a problem, baby girl?” He feigns ignorance, noticing the tight clench you had around his dick.
You force yourself to relax, “No, sir.”
“Good.” He says and starts thrusting inside of you, thankfully increasing his pace gradually before it reaches its usual brutality. Then he gives you no reprieve.
Why does he feel the need to fuck you so hard? You’re not some sex doll he can manhandle as he likes and if it breaks he could just get another one… or maybe you were. His thrusts against your bruised ass were powerful enough to push you forward, almost making you hit your head against the headboard if it weren’t for your palms acting as a makeshift cushion between you and the metal bars.
Oh yeah, he does it because it always leaves you a whimpering, moaning mess underneath him. “Ah, sir, is my pussy making you feel good? Am I being a good slut?”
You were kissing up to him, you knew that but you couldn’t take any more punishment. And maybe, just maybe, it turned you on as much as it did him.
“It’s fine.” He says curtly and you flush. Your pussy isn’t ‘fine’, it’s fucking great. How dare he?
You lower your chest further to make your ass become perter and give him the angle he likes, then you work your walls against him, simulating the wall they feel when you orgasm, knowing how much he loves it.
“Are you trying to cheat, baby?” He warns.
“No, sir, I’m just trying to make it up to you. I’ve been so bad today. You deserve so much better. Especially since I left you for so long with no way for you to get off while I ran off with another boy. I’ve been so selfish, haven’t I?” You coo.
Jungkook tightened his grip on your hips, hard enough to leave purple marks in the morning. “Yes, you have. Don’t do it again.”
“I won’t, sir. I just want to make you happy with me. Am I making you happy?”
“Yes, baby, yes.” Jungkook sounded close, his breath ragged and his voiced coming out deep and forced.
“So is my pussy still just ‘fine’?” He could practically hear the pout in your question, and he chuckles, “No, baby, it’s fucking perfect. Best I ever had.”
“Thank you, sir.” You sigh, finally content and feeling your orgasm rapidly approaching. But Jungkook beats you to it, and the warmth of his seed inside you almost push you off the edge if he had only continued thrusting into you just a few more times but he didn’t.
“Whyyyy?” You whine, but Jungkook ignores you and flips you onto your back again, the scarf twisting tighter around your hands, and your red ass too sore to lie down comfortably. He puts two fingers inside of you and hooks them forwards. You moan with relief, thinking he’s going to finger you but instead he uses them to scoop his cum from inside of you and move it to your lips.
“Open up. I can’t eat you out when you’re so full of my cum.”
At the mention of him eating you out, you rush to clean his fingers. Sucking them into your mouth and using your tongue to get them squeaky clean. He repeats the same action until he’s made you swallow every little bit of his cum then he finally goes down on you.
He doesn’t tease this time, alternating between pushing down on your clit with his tongue and fucking you with it. “Sir, please, won’t you make me cum? I want you to make me cum.” You cry, turned on beyond belief. The pent up arousal starting to turn painful.
Thankfully, he obliges, using his thumb to flick your clits and focusing his mouth on your entrance, his tongue fucking in and out of you and his lips sucking on the margin of your opening.
You start convulsing with your orgasm, pulling with all your might on your bindings in order to run a hand through his locks and guide him to your clit, but he already knows what you want, moving his mouth to your clit to shower it with attention and guiding you through your orgasm.
“Thank you, sir, oh god, thank you.” You slump into a boneless heap. Only stirring when Jungkook leaves and comes back with a wet towel to clean you both up and unlaces the knot around your wrists. He watches you rubbing your wrists to return the blood flow to them before he gets up and begins putting on his clothes.
“No, stay.” You whine. “Look at my wrist, and my ass,” You turn around to show him the red inflamed skin, shaking you ass up at him, “The least you could do is cuddle up with me. I feel lonely.”
“Why should I care about that?” He sneers but quickly backs down when he sees you flinch.
He sighs and throws away the pants he was going to put on, climbing into bed and facing you, “You’re more than a handful you know.” He wraps his arms around your waist and you squeeze one of your legs between his own.
You smile, “I know.”
But that smile fades as you see a question floating around in his eyes.
“What?” You ask with a little frown on your face. What was wrong now? Today was a long day and you just wanted to curl up into him and fall asleep.
He seems taken aback at the fact that you could apparently read him so easily but he just tells what’s on his mind, not bothering to attempt to lie. “You could’ve taken me, you know? I know how to behave when I need to.”
This again? Why was he so hung up on that? Could Hwasa have been telling you the truth this whole time? “Oh, so you would have said to my mum 'Now I see where ___ gets her good looks from.’ and shared your secret recipes with her?” You raise an eyebrow at him, smirking.
“Jin did that? Damn.” He laughs, “But yes, I could do that. It’s horribly cliche and pretentious but if that’s what your mum likes…” He uses a hand to play with your hair and you try your best to not look alarmed by it, not wanting him to stop, the soft caress of his fingers as it draws little circles on your scalp making your eyes flutter. It obviously wasn’t a big deal to him, just something he did without thinking so you didn’t need to think about it too much. But then again he’s never done this before…
You half-heartedly hit him in the chest, “Asshole! Fine, next time I’ll introduce you as my loving boyfriend. I’ll say your name is Jin since Jungkook is already taken. I’ll say I saw you one day and it was love at first sight. I was so smitten with you that I had to break up with Jin aka “Jungkook” because it wasn’t fair for him to stay when I loved another man so. My mum would fall even more in love with you than I am. We won’t get married despite our parents’ constant nagging because marriage is for losers who aren’t secure enough in their love lives but that’s not us. We won’t even have kids. We’ll just spend all the money we would’ve wasted on them to travel the world and live like motherfucking stars.“
You can’t say anymore because you were laughing so hard you couldn’t breathe, your face getting dangerously red. You take multiple deep breaths until you calm down then you speak again through the remaining quiet giggles, "Can you imagine?”
You were obviously not taking any of this seriously but it seems like Jungkook had because his hand had gone still in your hair and when you look at him, ready to whine about him stopping, you find him wearing an unreadable look, “No, I can’t. It’s fucking stupid.” His tone is sharp enough to cut. He gets off the bed, collecting his clothes again and getting dressed.
You were shell-shocked. Why the fuck did he have to be such a dick all the time? You were just joking around but he couldn’t even let you have that little bit of fun… The horrifying part is, you find yourself not caring about that and instead feeling hurt over the fact that he found what you to be so stupid that he had to leave. That the slightest show of emotion from you was so revolting to him.
None of the things you said today were wise but your next ones might just be the worst. Maybe you’d look back on your life one day and decide that you were over-reacting, that what he said wasn’t so bad to garner such a dramatic response from you and that you were costing yourself a perfectly decent fuckbuddy over nothing. Or maybe you’d look back and clap yourself on the back for saying it. Maybe Hwasa was right. If Jungkook does nothing more than annoy and apparently hurt you, then why don’t you just break it off with him? Maybe it’s time to find someone who, well, would treat you like a human with feelings for starters.
“I don’t want to be your fuck buddy anymore.”
Jungkook froze, his whole body becoming tense. “Is this because of Jin?”
“I… what?” You ask, genuinely not understanding what that had to do with anything.
“You know what? Whatever. You’re starting to get too clingy anyway.” Jungkook doesn’t even look at you as he pulls on his shirt and slams the door behind him.
He leaves you behind to be consumed by the deafening silence that does nothing to buffer the screeching confusion of thoughts inside your head. All feelings and sensations seep out of your body. You feel yourself becoming numb, barely able to breathe, your ears ringing, and the light slowly leaving your eyes.
Author’s Note: I definitely accept criticism as well so knock yourself out
The video was uploaded sometime after midnight early
As was usually the case after an akuma attack, Alya Cesaire
had been running on a caffeine rush and adrenaline high that made sleep
impossible. The dedicated blogger would
not see the back of her eyes until her copy was written, her files rendered,
and her newest masterpiece was live for the entire world to see.
Or at least the majority of Paris. She was young yet.
Fortunately for the aspiring journalist, the Ladyblog’s wide
and devoted readership ensured that the hits would rack up quickly regardless
of the time of posting.
What no one could have anticipated, however, was just how
It started with the local news.
Nadja Chamack’s bright-eyed good morning Paris grin
punctuated the more somber news of floods, akumas, and politics with the
light-hearted clip. The segment usually
reserved for heartwarming fluff pieces about eye-seeing dogs and neighborhood
bake sales was instead taken over by the city’s most reliable ratings machine.
Ladybug and Chat Noir were television gold.
From there the clip hit the major news networks and was
being broadcast to the whole of France.
Then came the talk shows, the copycat blogs, the online articles,
Buzzfeed, and more. When the video hit
the front page of Reddit there was no stopping the infection.
By the time Monday morning rolled around, less than three
days after the akuma attack and the video going live, Chat Noir had become the
laughing stock of Paris, the Internet, and the world.
And Marinette Dupain-Cheng was absolutely furious.
i think i’m pretty proud of this one, and i hope you guys feel the same as well. i stayed up till 10 am writing this and now i can go to sleep in peace. Enjoy my lovely jimin stans, i feel for you poor bitches
Pairing: Jimin x reader Genre: fluff, smut, angst( just a teeny tiny bit i guess) Word count: 8,760
When your best friend of years confessed his love to you in a spur of the moment kind of thing, you had no idea how to react.
Those words that caused you to stare at him for almost a minute straight as your what felt like a million thoughts ran through your head. You were trying to process it. You two were laying in his bed, both on your sides and facing each other, talking quietly amongst yourselves.
His hand would raise every few minutes, tracing some part of your arm or pushing a strand of hair back. You would giggle a bit when his legs moved to tangle with yours, his toes intentionally seeking out your feet to tickle you, and you would smack his chest and tell him to stop.
Then you became quiet, and you thought that he was getting sleepy when he kept closing his eyes every few seconds. But there was something a bit off, his lips barely parting in what seemed as an attempt to say something, but then he would shut his mouth again and sigh softly. The smile that was on his face earlier was now gone, and a small furrow on his brow was beginning to grow. So you lifted your hand and cupped his cheek softly for him to open his eyes and look at you, and when he did, some of the worry in his eyes went away and he sent a small smile. It wasn’t completely genuine though, you’d know that.
“What is it?”
“What?” He feigned confusion, and you nearly chuckled at his attempt to hide whatever it was he was trying to say.
“You’re a shitty liar Jimin, I thought we’ve established that a long time ago.” You smacked his cheek softly and he chuckled this time. Then, again, his face became bare of that smile and he sighed, gulping nervously.
“I’m not gonna force it out of you if you don’t wanna talk about it right now,” you sent him a comforting smile. “But you know you don’t need to keep anything from me.”
It was quiet. Not a sound was heard in the room. And then he spoke.
“It’s just - God, it’s getting harder for me everyday,” his voice was strained, as if he were in pain. And what you didn’t know was that he actually was in pain, the worst kind actually. The one that you can’t really do anything about.
A frown took over your face as concern started to seep through your veins at seeing the guy you loved and cared for so dearly slowly revealing what was making him so upset. And, god , you felt terrible for not noticing it before. How could he hide something that’s been bothering him for a long time without you noticing, while he could find out what was upsetting you before you even did?
“Talk to me,” you urged. He suddenly sat up in bed, his back now to you, and you felt your heart break at the slump in his shoulders with his head now in his hands, clearly showing you that this seemed pretty serious. You sat up as well, your hand resting on his shoulder and squeezing softly to reassure him.
“I’m in love with you, __.”
It was so quiet in the room you could hear a pin drop, and you partly held your breath in fear of it being too loud. You were motionless, your hand frozen on his shoulder in pure shock. Then it hit you.
Park Jimin just confessed to you.
The guy you never thought of as more than the closest of friend, who’d been there with you for years. He was with you through it all, the ups and downs. God, you had many, many downs, but he never showed the slightest hint of being tired with you and your shit.
He was there for you when you had your first high school heartbreak. After your crush had shown interest in your and slowly started getting closer to you, he finally dropped the bomb and asked you out. You were thrilled, fucking ecstatic. But after one date, and one date only, a few days later, you managed to find out that he had only done it as a bet. You ran to Jimin, holding back sobs of sadness and anger and frustration all mixed in one, spilling everything in a matter of seconds. He was seething with anger, but he put that anger aside for the time being to hold you in his arms and whisper soothing words in your ear, squeezing you so tightly onto his chest all the while holding you gently as if you were the frailest of beings.
He was there when your parents were against you wanting to study a different major in college than the one they wanted for you. You had a huge fight with them and ran out of the house, quickly texting Jimin to meet you in your usual spot at the park, and he was there before you were. He let your rant away in anger, frustrated tears running down your cheeks at your parents’ way of thinking. When you were done talking, he wiped away your tears and cupped your cheeks. We’ll figure it out, he said to you, before he brought your face closer to press a kiss to your forehead and hugged you for an hour straight, right there in the middle of the park.
And then when one of your girlfriends who you’d been friends with for years, her name was Jess, turned out to be the definition of the word backstabber. You didn’t find out until you saw a conversation on her phone between her and a guy you’d mentioned to her before, who you thought you liked. Despite the obvious flirting that you might’ve let slide without too big of a problem, it was filled with demeaning lies she was telling him about you, some about you being a whore who slept with anything with two legs, some about you cheating on your ex-boyfriends, some about you being a mean bitch. And, as usual, you went to Jimin, and he was there with open arms and a shoulder waiting for you to use.
He was there when you got your first job because college payments were starting to weigh down on you. It was only a simple, part-time job but you were still thrilled with it, happy to be making your own pay, even if it was only minimum for the time being. You called him immediately, squealing over the phone that you got the job, and he chuckled softly before congratulating you. “I’ll take you out tonight to celebrate then.”
The list went on and on and it would never stop if you had to list off every single thing you two had been through together. But at the moment, you had no idea what to do, what to say, what to feel. You felt the pressure slowly weighing down on your heart because you truly didn’t know how to handle this. However, you couldn’t say it back, not now, not so carelessly when you knew you were even 50% sure it was true. You loved him too much to be so unfair to him and lie to him that way.
“I..” Your voice trailed off, and you winced at even opening your stupid mouth before you put together a decent sentence in your frazzled mind.
He turned to you anyways, a small smile on his lips, and it was so sad you literally felt as if your heart was being wrenched and squeezed to cause you pain. He lifted his hand and grabbed yours that was on his shoulder, enveloping it in both of his. He looked down at your joined hands for a few seconds, and you did so as well, feeling some of the pain you felt just seconds ago decrease at the comfort this simple act brought, and then he looked up at you again.
“It’s fine, __,” he said. “You don’t have to say it back, I don’t expect you to say anything like that unless you mean it. Take your time, clear your head and think about this as long as you need.”
“I just need to ask you for one favor.”
“Anything you want.” Your voice was as soft as ever.
“In the mean time, don’t treat me any differently. Don’t treat me like the guy who just confessed his love for you, treat me as your best friend, yeah?”
You couldn’t help the smile that slowly overtook your lips, and he smiled as well, this one seeming more genuine than the last.
“Of course, Jimin.”
After that night, you tried not to show it, but everything became as clear as daylight to you. You noticed every little thing you managed to be so blind to before, and you felt like you could throw yourself off a cliff at being so stupidly oblivious all those years. All the simple things you thought Jimin only did out of pure niceness or just simply for the fact that you were his best friend, weren’t that simple.
Like when you first broke your phone and he took about half the money he’d been saving up for the last year to buy you a new one. Or when, in your first year in uni, managed to fix both your schedules so that you had about 90% of your classes together, only managing to miss a few. Or when you found out he’d asked his brother to pitch and help him with some money on your birthday because he knew you’d had your eye on that one necklace you showed him once when you were walking around downtown. Or when he made a copy of his apartment keys especially made for you, with your own key chain as well that had both your initials carved into it, even when you knew he loved his privacy and it was one of his top priorities. Or when he spent a whole week at your house when you had a simple cold, adamant to spend a whole week to make sure you were okay even though you’d started feeling better after only three days.
And now you noticed those loving looks and smile he kept reserved only for you, the ones you used to think he gave to everyone because he was just that much of a sweetheart. The hugs he gave you, and the kisses he planted to your head.
You were still confused and your mind was a mess, but you tried to make him feel like nothing was wrong and that you were taking it well. And you really were trying, you were thinking about it. Not a second passed by without you thinking about it, trying to decipher how exactly you felt about.
You just needed some time, and as long as Jimin was more than willing to offer that to you for as long as you liked, you were going to take it.
“You’re coming tonight right?” He asked through the phone.
“Yeah, of course. I wouldn’t miss his birthday for anything.” It was Jin’s birthday, and the guys along with a lot of other people are planning on celebrating it with him to the max tonight in one of your favorite bars that you usually gathered in.
“Great, I’ll pick you up then. Be ready at 9, yeah? Love you.”
And he hung up. Your eyes widened at that last statement, at the way he said it so naturally as if he was used to it. And as he sat there in his room, his phone now locked as he started at it with wide eyes, realizing the words he’d just let slip out of his mouth unintentionally. He was starting to panic on the inside, fear building up inside of him at the thought of you being annoyed or repulsed with those two simple words, but what he didn’t know was that you sat there, phone held in hand as well, similar to him, except there was a small smile spreading on your lips because it actually sounded so nice to hear those words from him come so casually and naturally.
Later that night, you were dressed in one of your favorite dresses. It was maroon colored. tight on your torso but flowed at the wait. It went down to mid-thigh and had an open back. You wore heels to top it off, and your hair was down with a bit of makeup. You didn’t know what to think of the fact that you wore this dress because Jimin had once said how much he liked it on you, and that it was his favorite color. Or that you let your hair down even after you’d earlier decided that you wanted it up, because you remembered Jimin saying he loved it when you had your hair down, natural and without a thing done to it. And that you cut down on your makeup because he loved the way you looked with minimal makeup. He said he appreciated the small effort you put in while still being able to see some features that he didn’t like to be hidden under makeup.
And so when you saw him waiting for you in the car, his head down as he used his phone, probably playing that game he was currently hooked on, you felt your heart beat faster and your palms got slightly sweaty. But then it all went away when you got in the car and he looked up at you, his eyes almost disappearing at the wide smile he gave you, teeth on full show and cheeks squished up in the most adorable way,
“You look gorgeous.” It wasn’t the first time he’d complimented you that way, but it was the first time you felt your cheeks heat up slightly, but you couldn’t even bother to hide it.
“You look dashingly handsome as well,” you teased, and he chuckled as he tried to tone down the slight blush that was begging to show on his cheeks. And at that moment, you honestly couldn’t help but lean across the gear lever and smacked your lips against his cheek, giggling when you saw the smudge your lipstick left on his skin.
“W-what was that for?” He chuckled, but you didn’t miss the small stutter at the beginning of his sentence.
“Just felt like it,” you answered simply with a smile as you lifted a hand to wipe away the color from his cheek.
The smile he sent your way had your heart fluttering in a way it never did before.
“Happy birthday, Jinnie!” You pulled him into a bear hug and he squeezed back just as tightly. You pulled away and held him by the shoulders, smiling at him widely. “You’re one year older now, maybe this’ll make your lame dad jokes sound funnier now that you’re- ow! Okay, okay, I’m done.” You let him go with a laugh as he scowled at you playfully.
“Just take your friend away Jimin, I don’t need to hear this on my birthday.” He pushed you towards Jimin, and you stumbled and fell into his arms, grateful that he steadied you firmly. You turned to Jin and flipped him off, but Jimin kept his arms around you nonetheless.
“If I leave, my present’s going with me so..” You turned to Jimin once again and wrapped your arm around his to pull him elsewhere, looking for empty seats so you could settle down. You pretended you didn’t almost hear your heartbeat in your ears because your arm was wrapped tightly around his, and you could feel his muscles beneath the material of his shirt.
The tables were filled with people whom you know, and some you didn’t. You greeted all of them nonetheless, letting go of Jimin to give a few hugs around, and then you felt his arm around your waist instead.
You settled down next to each other, both of your seats unconsciously turning towards each other as you engaged in a conversation about who would wear something flashier tonight, Taehyung or Namjoon, each of you betting on one. The bet ended in laughter as soon as the pair showed up, with you winning because of Taehyung, tears of laughter gathering at the corners of your eyes, Jimin leaning his forehead against your shoulder in an attempt to hide his laughter as some of the eyes around you turned to you with amused looks.
“Fine, I’ll get the drinks, you earned it.” he sighed with a smile and stood up, and you nodded triumphantly. You watched as he talked to the bar, raising his hand to grab the attention of the bar tender. However, out of the corner of your eye, you saw someone get up, and when you looked their way, it was a girl. A very pretty one at that.
She was sat with a few of your friends, but her face wasn’t very familiar to you. That wasn’t your concern at the moment. Your concern was that you saw the look in her eyes, and it was fixed on Jimin. Her walk was determined as she made her way to the bar, and you suddenly felt queasy. The smile that was once on your lips was slowly fading away the more you took in her appearance. She looked damn near perfect. Hair long and wavy, a shine to it that made yours look dull. She had on a skin tight dress that showed off her gorgeous figure, and her legs seemed so long and toned in the heels she was wearing. Not only did she have the body, but her face was really cute as well.
The more you analyzed this girl who has now reached Jimin and tapped him on the shoulder shyly, the more you slumped in your seat and uneasy feeling in your stomach seemed to grow.
“You look like you want to jump off a cliff,” a voice suddenly sounded in your ear and you jumped in surprise. You looked to your left to see Jungkook next to you, smiling at you with a knowing look on his face. You quickly put a smile on your face and shook your head with a laugh.
“And why would I want to do that?” You teased, leaning back in your seat.
“Are you really trying to bullshit me right now?”
“Jungkook, what the hell are you-”
“You know,” he cut you off and leaned towards your seat to say something that only you would hear, and you felt your heart speed up for what had to be the third time so far this night at his words. “He only has eyes for you, so don’t stress it too much.”
“What’re you talking about?” You tried to steady your voice and sound as confused as you could, but you had a feeling you knew what.
“You know what I’m talking about,” he repeated your thoughts aloud. You couldn’t handle looking at him anymore, knowing he had you figured out, and turned your gaze to the bar once again. Though you wish you hadn’t because the sight made you rage with jealousy. Yes, jealousy, that’s what it was. JImin was still waiting for the drinks to arrive and the girl was standing too close to him than what you thought was necessary, giving him those heart eyes and swooning up at him with a flirty gaze. You could almost hear her obnoxious giggle in your head.
You were so blinded by your jealousy that you didn’t even see the uncomfortable look on Jimin’s face at the moment, clearly trying to weasel his way out of the conversation that didn’t seem to end.
“If you can’t see it, I’ll tell you that Jimin is more than not interested in her because it looks like he’s being tortured right now,” Jungkook said, and you could hear the smile in his voice. And true to his words, you finally looked up at Jimin’s face, only to see the uncomfortable expression he adorned, a smile so fake on his lips you almost laughed right then and there.
You heard yourself sigh in relief, and Jungkook chuckled beside you. “Your his best friend, aren’t you supposed to help him out of this?”
You looked to him to see if he was serious, and he raised his eyebrows at you with a smile, as if challenging you to do it. You took a deep breath, put your clutch aside and got up from your seat. You would’ve been deaf not to hear the ‘yes’ that Jungkook said as you made your way to Jimin, and you could almost imagine him fist-bumping the air.
“Babe,” you put on your ‘girlfriend’ voice, wrapping your arms around Jimin in a back-hug. He jumped slightly at the sudden contact, turning his head to look at you with a surprised look but you only smiled at him, hoping he got the message. “What’s taking you so long?”
His surprised look was suddenly replaced with a smile of his own, and he grabbed your hand to pull you next to him, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and placing a kiss to the top of your head. You felt like you could melt right fucking there. God, you never wanted to leave his arms. He smelled so good, and he literally radiated warmth, tempting you to cling onto him like a damn koala.
“Sorry, baby,” he said, and if it weren’t for you supporting yourself on him, your knees would’ve wobbled at the pet name. “The drinks are taking a while.”
The girl awkwardly cleared her throat, and you almost scoffed at the sight of her still there. But you managed to put on a fake smile when you turned to her, greeting her nicely despite her eyeing you up as if you were trying to steal her man.
“Hi,” you said cheerfully. “Who are you?”
Jimin snorted lowly, but it was enough to be heard, so he quickly tried to cover it up with a cough. He tightened his arm around you, and you took it a step further by stepping in front of him. He was sat on one of the stools, so he parted his legs for you and you leaned back into his chest as he wrapped both arms around your waist and rested his chin casually on your shoulder.
You could practically hear her seething.
“I’m Jane,” she answered curtly with a smile so fake you almost vomited. Her eyes turned to Jimin once again and what she said next surprised you. “Is this your girlfriend or something? My friend told me you two were just friends so..” She trailed off as if awaiting for some type of explanation.
You couldn’t help the scoff that left your lips, but then Jimin squeezed your waist to calm you down, knowing you had a low tolerance level for rude people. “I don’t really care what your friend told you, but just to clear everything up here. Yes, we’re dating, and I’d appreciate it if you’d stop ogling my boyfriend,” your smile was sickeningly sweet in contrast to your words. It felt nice to say those words. Dating. Boyfriend. Jimin. They all seemed to sound nice coming together.
She scoffed and with a barely audible ‘whatever’, she turned away and went to the restrooms. You felt relief when she disappeared from your sight, relaxing against Jimin’s chest. Then you felt his chest rumble and you knew he was chuckling.
“Thanks for that, she wouldn’t take a hint.” His words were followed with a kiss that was pressed to your cheek. You turned to him, and was pleased when his arms didn’t loosen their grip from your waist, looking up at him with a smile.
“It was my pleasure really,” you chuckled. “She seemed like a bitch anyways.”
The smile he gave you told you he knew. He knew everything. But he kept his word and stayed quiet, not pressing the subject further and giving you the time you needed. But somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that it was working, and that you were starting to realize everything. He was willing to give you all the time in the world if it meant you would end up being his.
“Don’t get drunk, Jimin.”
“Don’t drink too much, Jimin.”
“Jimin, this is your fourth drink already.”
“I think you should cut down on the drinks, Jimin.”
Despite all your warnings throughout the night, he still ended up dunk. Drink after drink, he would promise it was his last one, but then he’d tilt his head and give you that look that made you think you were best friends with a damn puppy, and you would cave in. You thanked god that you had the self control to stop from consuming too much alcohol yourself, because if it wasn’t you that took care of drunk Jimin, then who would it be?
“I’m not drunk, __,” he whined, and you giggled when he attempted to rest his elbow on the table but only managed to slip and nearly bump his head on the wooden surface.
“Sure, sweetie, you’re not. But no more drinks for you anyways,” you tried to say as sternly as possible.
“Fine,” he huffed with a pout and rested his chin against his hand, gaze fixed on you. A lot of the people that were here had left since it was past 2 AM now, not more than ten people still sitting at the tables, most probably drunk as well, even Jin since he was the birthday boy.
Your eyes landed back on Jimin to see that he was still staring at you silently, and you shifted under his intense gaze.
“What’re you thinking about?” You asked quietly.
“You.” Your eyebrows raised.
“Me?” You leaned towards him and rested your head in the same position as his, now facing each other. “What about me, Jimin?”
“You’re gorgeous.” He blurted out, and you felt your face heat up. “You’re so, so gorgeous. I’ve thought so since we were kids, even in middle school when you got your braces,” he giggled and you smacked his arm but stayed quiet. “Even in high-school when you had that stupid hippie phase that lasted three months.” You groaned at that, but you couldn’t help but giggle as well. “Even when you’re crying and you feel like shit, you still manage to look so fucking beautiful. How is that possible?” You didn’t think you were supposed to reply to that, and he continued talking. “I know I said I’d give you as much time as you needed, and I’m still keeping that promise, but it’s honestly taking so much willpower for me not to kiss you right now..” His eyes were hazy as they stared at you, the look in his eyes holding so much love and want for you.
Your face was now beet red at his words, and you gulped nervously when you saw his eyes flicker down to your lips. But you couldn’t let this happen, not like this, when he was drunk and would most probably forget he even did it the following morning. So you smiled softly and got up from your seat, grabbing his arm to help him up.
“Let’s get you home, Jimin.”
When you were laying in bed one Friday night, scrolling through your Instagram feed, you really didn’t expect your thoughts to take a downhill turn he so quickly.
You saw a photo of Jimin. You smiled, double tapped and scrolled past it. But then after a few more photos, you quickly scrolled back up, looking at it for a few seconds before you clicked on his name. His account showed up on your screen, and that familiar warm feeling entered your tummy when you started to flick through his pictures, most of them being with you. Some were just downright silly with the ugliest faces, some with you two smiling like normal people, and some were of only you. Those photos were his favorites, he once said to you, because he took them without you noticing and you looked effortlessly beautiful. Which was frustrating and unfair, he’d add in the end with a laugh.
You paused on one photo in particular. It was an old one, years ago. You were on his back, gripping his shoulder and he was holding up your legs around his waist, and Jungkook had then managed to snap that photo seconds before the both of you went tumbling to the ground.
You loved this man so much it hurt. You weren’t hesitating it admitting to yourself that, yes, you felt the same way about him that he felt about you. But what ifs were starting to take their toll on you, and you knew you shouldn’t let that happen. You should just do what makes the both of you happy and end the wait, but then… what if?
What if you two broke up? What if it didn’t work out? What if, once you two started dating, he would quickly get tired after realizing you weren’t anything special? What if you two grew apart?
No. No. You couldn’t handle that, not ever. He was too important for you to lose. He was there with you your whole life and you weren’t about to make a mistake and even consider the idea of losing him along the way.
As much as you craved to tell him how you felt, to tell him everything, and have him wrap you in his arms and kiss you again and again, you couldn’t. You gulped down a heavy sigh, but the lump in your throat was stuck there as you felt tears pool up in your eyes.
You took your phone out, choosing that a text would be much easier to do this than over a phone call or in person.
i’ve thought about what you’ve told me a lot over the past few weeks.. you know i love you jimin, i love you to death, but i think it’s better if we stay friends. i’m sorry
Six days. Six days and he still hasn’t texted you, called you, seen you or made any type of contact. You didn’t know if you were angry or guilty, or maybe both at the same time.
You knew this would happen. You two weren’t even in a relationship and he wasn’t talking to you because you rejected his feelings. You couldn’t lie and say you expected this though, you were hurt to say the least. You didn’t think this would be enough to throw over a decade of friendship away, you thought you were more important to him and he loved you enough to try and move on.
But clearly you weren’t.
Currently on your living room couch, TV on but you weren’t really watching, lost in your thoughts as you thought about what you should do. Then the door of your apartment swung open and you jumped up from your couch, hand on your heart as you saw Jungkook march into the living room.
“What the fuck, Kook? You can’t just barge in like that, I could’ve -”
“What the hell did you tell, Jimin?” His voice wasn’t high but you could hear the anger in it. You froze in your spot, and the look he was giving you only made you shift your gaze to the ground for a few seconds before you looked back up.
“Did he tell you?” You asked.
“No, but I’m guessing it’s something really stupid considering the way he’s been acting the past few days,” he snapped.
“I’m trying to talk to him, but he won’t answer! I must’ve called a hundred times but he won’t even answer me,” you defended yourself. “I’m not gonna go and force him to talk to me, if he needs space for a little while, I’ll give it to him.”
“Oh yeah, well he sure is enjoying his space alright,” he sighed, uncrossing his arms and walked forward to sit down on the couch. He ran his hands down his face before he looked back up at you. “Do you know what he’s up to tonight?”
“I told you, Jungkook, he hasn’t been answering any of my calls. How the hell would I know?” You huffed, dropping down on the couch next to him. Then the words that left his lips hit you harder than a fucking truck.
“He’s going on a date.”
Your mouth dropped open and you looked at him in disbelief, trying to ignore the gut-wrenching feeling you suddenly felt, hoping what you just heard was just a figment of your sick imagination.
“Yeah, a date,” he confirmed. “He said it was too much for him and that he needed a distraction.”
“A distraction?” You said in disbelief, slowly feeling a small twinge of anger rising inside you.
“Yeah, and to make it even worse, it’s with that girl from the bar the other night,” he continued, fueling that growing anger. “The one from Jin’s birth-”
“Yeah, I fucking know her, Jungkook,” you snapped.
“Alright, jeez, don’t shoot the messenger,” he held his hands up. “I just thought you’d better know.”
How could he do this? Six straight days you’d been drowning yourself in guilt, crying yourself to sleep at the thought of losing your best friend. He was your everything and you lost him. You hoped and prayed he would at least take some pity on you and talk to you face to face one last time to tell you he couldn’t be your friend anymore, so that you could see him one last time and be in his presence.
But a date? A distraction? Is this what he called being in love?
It was like someone had stabbed you in the back, and the last person you imagined would’ve made you feel this way was Park Jimin. Yet again, you were wrong.
You forced your anger to overpower your sadness, managing to hold back the tears to ask Jungkook the question that was nagging you. “Where is he?”
If you thought his answer before had destroyed you, the answer he gave you next sent you six feet under.
“At the diner you two go to.”
Angry tears that you couldn’t stop were streaming down your face as you got out of the cab, practically jogging up to the door of the diner. You looked through the glass windows to find him sitting alone at one of the tables, and it seemed as if you were getting all sorts of hits today when you realized he was sat at your usual table.
You swung the door open, not caring about the few heads that turned towards you as you stomped your way over to him, noticing that the seat across from him was empty.
Good, she must be in the bathroom or something.
You stood in front of him and wiped away your tears, but it was useless because a fresh wave escaped your eyes as soon as you did.
He looked up at you as soon as he felt your presence, and his eyes widened at the sight of you in tears. He quickly sprung up from his seat and took a step closer to you, lifting his hand in an attempt to wipe your tears but you took a step back quickly.
“__, baby, what’s wrong?” His voice was so good to hear after so many days, but it still hurt to hear it.
“You brought her here?” You whimpered out. “You brought her to our fucking place, Park Jimin? Is this what you call a distraction?” You tried to control your voice but it was shaky through the tears and half sobs you were letting out. “Football is a distraction. Golf is a distraction. Drinking is a distraction. Hell, even go to a fucking strip club for all I car, Jimin. But bringing someone you barely know to this place, and having the nerve to bring her to our table? Wow,” you chuckled bitterly, and you almost scoffed at the confused look on his face.
“__, what are you talking-”
“Six days, Jimin! No calling or texting or anything, and I was okay with that because you need your space, I know that,” your voice was desperate now. “But why would you do this? I thought you loved me.”
“I do,” he said in a heartbeat, and he took a step closer and held your hand before you could step back. “I do. I love you so fucking much, but what the hell are you talking about right now? Who did I bring here? __, I’m so confused, just please talk to me.”
“Jungkook told me you were here on a date, Jimin,” you sniffled, using your free hand to wipe some tears away as you took a deep breath in an attempt to calm down.
“He did what?” His tone was shocked, and you almost believed.
“Come on, Jimin. Cut the crap, why would he-”
“Oh, hey, __. I didn’t know you were coming.” You heard a familiar voice come from your left, and your head snapped to see Taehyung making his way over. “Sorry, I was in the restr- woah, are you okay? What’s wrong?” His smile was wiped off and his voice filled with concern at the sight of you in tears.
Your eyes quickly went back to Jimin and he was already looking at you, eyebrows raised as if to tell you, see?
“Oh, erm, hi Tae..” You said awkwardly, letting go of Jimin’s hand and wiping at your tears hastily, attempting to fix your distressed state as you felt your face become red. “Yeah, I just needed to talk to Jimin real quick.”
“__, come on. I need to talk to you,” Jimin grabbed your hand. “I’ll catch up with you later Tae.”
Tae smiled understandingly and waved the both of you off as Jimin pulled you by the hand outside of the diner, and even in a time like this, you cherished the warmth of his hand enveloping yours.
He kept walking until he reached his car, and he wordlessly held the door open for you after he unlocked it before making his way to the driver’s seat. He got in but didn’t put the keys in the ignition, sitting quietly for about a minute straight before he spoke up.
“So you came here because Jungkook told you I brought some girl here on a date?” He asked.
“That little shit,” he growled. “He always has to stick his nose in other people’s shit and-”
“I’m glad he did, Jimin,” you cut him off. You knew he turned his head to look at you but you kept staring ahead, eyes fixed on a flickering street lamp in the nearly empty parking lot. “If it weren’t for him, who knows how long it would’ve taken me to talk to you.”
“I’m sorry. I was gonna call you soon, I just..” He trailed off, guilt evident in his voice, and you felt the same exact feeling because he didn’t do anything wrong, nothing.
“Don’t apologize, you had every right not to answer,” your voice sounded choked and you felt like the tears were coming back any second now. “I mean, what kind of best friend am I? I couldn’t even tell you in person, when you deserved an actual conversation and a full explanation about it, I texted you a short meaningless text like I was ordering a fucking pizza or something,” you sniffled when you felt a tear slowly slide down your cheek.
You felt his hand on your cheek, his thumb softly stopping the tear on its path, and you turned your head to look at him, eyes filled with sorrow and regret.
“I’m so sorry, Jimin.”
“Don’t apologize, __. You can’t help your feelings. It’s not your fault that you don’t love-”
“But I do!” You blurted out desperately, not standing the thought of him thinking you didn’t. “I do, I love you so fucking much, Jimin. I’m so in love with you.” Your hand came up and grabbed his that was on your cheek, holding it tightly in both hands, your body shifting slightly so you could face him properly. “I just don’t want to lose you. You mean the world to me and just the thought of something going wrong and then us drifting apart makes me go crazy. I just -” You took a deep breath in an attempt to calm down. “I can’t live without you.”
“You won’t have to. You won’t ever have to do that, __.” His tone was so soft and reassuring, you found yourself leaning over the console and throwing your arms around his neg in a tight hug. You buried your head in his neck, your tears wetting his neck but he didn’t seem to care as he buried his face in your hair. His arms tightened around your waist and he helped you lift yourself and maneuver your way into his lap. “No matter what, I’ll never leave you. I thought you’d know that by now considering the way I’ve been stuck by your ass for the past decade or something.”
You couldn’t help but chuckle despite your tears and he chuckled as well, and you tightened your arms around his neck, digging your face deeper into his neck to inhale his scent, something that always managed to calm you down.
You stayed that way for who knows how long, wrapped in each other’s arms, unable to pull away. But then a knock on the car window caused you two to jump apart in surprise, and you looked to see two smiling faces. Jimin hissed in displeasure but rolled his window down nonetheless.
“The hell are you doing here?” His question was most probably pointed at Jungkook.
“Just checking up on you two since you can’t seem to take care of yourselves like fucking grownups,” he scoffed but he had a smile on his face, earning a chuckle from Taehyung.
“Get out of here before I kick both your asses,” Jimin threatened in a serious tone. “And don’t even get me started on what I’m gonna do with you later, you little -” You cut off his threat to Jungkook by giggling and leaning against his chest.
“You should let him off the hook this one time, babe,” you let the pet name slip and you saw his lips curl up slightly. “At least it worked.”
“Yeah, Jimin, it worked,” Jungkook said smugly. And this time you flipped him off before rolling up the window yourself, quite pleased with the black tinted glass.
“Hey! We need a ride!”
“I suggest you two leave before you hear anything you don’t wanna hear,” you yelled, giggling when they groaned, muttering ‘ew’ and ‘gross’ simultaneously before it was silent once again.
You looked back to Jimin to find him looking at you with a large grin on his face, and this time you were the first one to say it.
“I’m in love with you , Park Jimin.”
“__, fuck. Baby,” his head dropped back against the pillow as your kisses traveled down his bare chest, already slightly damp with sweat. You didn’t waste a single second and quickly unbuttoned his jeans, pulling them down with his help. You bit your lip when your eyes landed on the bulge in his boxers, showing clearly through the dark tight material.
His chest heaved up and down when you grabbed the hem with your teeth, your pinkies hooking on both ends on his hips to help you pull it down, his eyes glazed with burning lust that had your body scorching hot. As soon as you got them all the way down, your lips quickly found his length, mouthing up and down at the hardness. You pressed sloppy kisses to it before your tongue slipped out for a taste, and his groan only spurred you on.
Your hand grabbed the base of it to angle him properly to your mouth, and you licked your lips at the sight of him so hard and ready for you. He stared down at you, eyes wide with anticipation as he waited for your next move, but they quickly slid shut once again when took his head in your mouth.
“Fuck,” he groaned out, his voice sounding much deeper than usual, and you felt yourself fucking soaking through your panties. Thankfully, your panties were the only piece of clothing you had on, making the steps you had to take later on much easier.
You slowly started bobbing your head to take more of him in your mouth, absolutely loving the way he tasted in your mouth. You weren’t usually one to enjoy doing stuff like this, but something about giving Jimin pleasure and making him feel good was better than receiving pleasure yourself. And you showed it to him by trying to take as much of him into your mouth as you couch until he hit the back of your throat.
“__, shit -” You gagged against his length and pulled your mouth away to cough slightly, regaining your breath but making up for it by stroking him with your hand, your spit making it easy for you to move your hand up and down. You leaned down and enveloped him once again in the warmth of your mouth, earning a long moan from him.
You didn’t know for how long you did that, bobbing your head slowly before increasing your pace every once in a while, then slowing down once again. Nothing but the sound of your mouth working on him, lewd sucking noises filling the room, as well as his pants and groans with your occasional hums were heard.
“Baby, baby stop.” He gripped your hair and softly tugged in an effort to pull your mouth away from him, and you obliged. “Come’ere,” he panted and you immediately clambered on top of his body, desperate to reach his mouth and kiss those swollen lips that you never knew would feel so amazing on yours, so right.
His hands touched every inch of your skin, fingers groping tightly onto every curve with neediness, and your hands did the same. Your nails grazed his skin, unable to control yourself, occasionally tugging on his soft hair when he squeezed your ass tightly in both hands.
Your hips moved and ground down onto his, your clothed crotch making contact with his bare length, but fuck it felt so good. Your panties were so thin and soaked through, you could practically feel every ridge and vein along his cock, and the pace of your hips immediately increased in desperation as sparks of euphoria tingled throughout your body.
“Fuck, that feels so good,” his head dropped back against the pillow beneath his head, eyes fluttering shut and exposing his throat to your lips. Your mouth landed on his Adam’s apple, your teeth grazing it softly and he reciprocated by splaying both hands on your ass and squeezing harshly, pushing you down harder against him and thrusting his hips up at the same time, putting just the right amount of pressure on your clit.
“Jimin,” you whimpered out. “Please, let me ride you.”
“Anything you want, baby. I’m all yours.” His words were breathy, lost in the pleasure of having you so willing in pliant in his arms, wanting this just as badly as he did. He was ready to give you everything, his whole world on a golden platter if you so much as thought about asking for it. His love for you was overflowing and he couldn’t believe he was finally able to share it with you.
“__, ah - fuck, yeah.” His groans were sexier than you could ever imagine, doubling the pleasure that was already running through your body. “God, you ride me so fucking good.”
You whimpered at his words, your nails digging into his sweaty chest as you bounced on top of him. He filled you up so nicely, nothing like you’d ever felt before. You were both drenched in sweat by now, your heart stuck to the back of your neck, and his matted down to his forehead, beads of sweat on his temples. He looked like a god, skin shiny with sweat, face blissed out, eyes fluttering shut every few seconds but fighting their way back open, swollen lips parted to let out pants and groans, cheeks flushed red in the most fucked out way.
“Fuck, fuck,” you whimpered, bouncing faster on him, the sound of skin smacking against skin filling the room as your ass met his thick thighs with each movement you made. “Jimin, I love you so much, baby..”
The loudest moan yet left his lips at your words, and he immediately sprang up from the mattress and sat up, his torso now flush against yours. He grabbed your hips and continued to bounce you on his cock.
“I love you, baby. I fucking love you,” he practically growled out the words before wrapping his arms tightly around your waist to flip you over. Your hands wrapped around him and gripped frantically onto his back when he immediately started pounding into you, crying out in immense pleasure at having the man you loved so much fuck you so good.
Your moans turned to scream, the bed squeaking in protest at the harsh movements Jimin made, your bodies moving desperately on the bed as you fucked like it was the last time, when it was actually only the first time of many, and the thought of that alone had you moaning louder.
“Jimin - fuck!” You squealed out, your head dropping back against the mattress when his mouth enveloped your nipple hungrily, sucking harshly at the sensitive bud as he continued his assault on your pussy. You could almost hear the sound of him moving inside you with how wet you were, but it was drowned out by louder much more prominent noises.
“Mine. You’re mine, baby,” he grunted, his hands slipping slightly on your thighs before he gripped them tightly and positioned them properly around his waist. His mouth found yours and he stuck his tongue in your mouth, giving extremely harsh thrusts and swallowing your desperate cries in return, You could do nothing but run your nails down his back, the sensations running through your body becoming too much for you.
His hands slid down from your thighs to your ass, gripping harshly before landing a smack there, and you couldn’t even cry out properly anymore, barely a whimper slipping out.
Jimin fucked you through your first orgasm, staring at you with glazed eyes as you writhed beneath him in sensitivity, eyes eating you up with insatiable hunger that had been pent up through years.
He turned you on your hands and knees and fucked you hard and fast, before your hands gave out and you dropped your face into the mattress. But he couldn’t even bother to stop, fucking you with your cries muffled into the sheets as you gripped them so tight, you were pretty sure they ripped.
He then flipped you once again on your back and leaned down so his body was completely stuck to yours before fucking you slow and deep, building up your orgasm in the best way possible, agonizingly yet beautifully slowly, and it was so intense you had tears of pleasure running down your cheeks by the end of it.
He fucked you through the night, taking you in every way he imagined possible, pleasuring your body like never before, all the while releasing all the pent up frustration he had on your body and making it his once and for all.
You woke up and turned to find him already staring at you with a smile so full of love and adoration, you were bashful. You smiled back and he leaned in to peck your lips.
“I love you,” you whispered against his lips, and he whispered it back in a heartbeat. You moved closer to hug him, your head resting on his chest. You’ve never felt safer than in his arms right now, legs tangled, bodies bare and stuck together as if they were one beneath the warm sheets.
As an introvert, I did get off the sugaring sites, but it took me quite a while to get off the internet. I used Tinder to find the three gift daddies that I had. Last month, I went free styling for the first time.
There is a general horror around free styling that, trust me, I understand. If I didn’t have to leave my house, I wouldn’t. But I realized a few things. The sugar sites are not set up for you to succeed. We, as sugar babies, are the draw that is used to attract men with money and unrealistic dreams.
Do you want to have the perfect relationship? A young, beautiful, smart woman who will hang off your every word and, unlike escorts, will be with you and you alone for a fraction of the price that escorts are demanding? Sign up for a membership with our site at the low price of $39.99/month and become a sugar daddy tonight!
While this might not be the exact language the sites are using, I guarantee if you go on any of the sugar sites you will see something similar being touted to men. I also promise that the men that have the real potential to be amazing sugar daddies and give you things you didn’t believe that you could get aren’t on these sites.
And, honey, maybe you haven’t noticed but online dating-sugar or vanilla- is not set up for black women to succeed. I’ll say it once more. You’re far more likely to find the man you’re looking for when you let go of the sugar sites. So what happens next? Next, you change your mindset. There is one thing that needs adjustment, your attitude, in two different areas. The first is what a sugar daddy looks like. Maybe you don’t have this problem. But I do. I tend to find myself thinking that sugar daddies look a certain way. They’re white and in their 40’s-50’s. Most of them are married. But this isn’t what sugar daddies look like. They can be any age. They can be any race. They can be anywhere. When it’s time to free style, don’t think that if a Black man, an Asian man, a Martian, whatever, approaches you that because they don’t fit in with the idea of what you think an SD looks like you can’t pay any attention to them.
There will be three types of men that you’ll meet when you go out: cheap men that would like your time and attention for free, men that will simply ask how much you want or make it known that they have no problem paying you, and men that are willing to spend money on you but need some type of connection with you first. Ugh, connection. Don’t you hate that word? Men should just hand us money because we asked for it right? We’re young, we’re beautiful, we’re smart. Just fork over the coins.
But consider this. How often do you give money to complete strangers because they asked for it? How often have you walked up to an attractive or interesting looking person with $5 that you know you don’t need and said: “here this is for you just because you look cool or like you needed a little help”? Never right? If we were a society where that was the norm homelessness would not be an issue. No, we give our money to people we like, to people that have bettered our lives in some way, to people we trust. But, still. That word-connection. Months and months of dates. Maybe even putting out. That must be what I mean, right? Nope. Not what I mean at all. A connection can be made in 15 minutes or 15 months. It really just depends on how well your personality meshes with his.
How do you tell these men apart? Let’s build a scenario, shall we? Let’s say you meet a man at a bar. You each talk a bit about who you are and what you do for a living. His job sounds promising. You don’t know exactly how much he makes but when you google it in the bathroom after touching up your lipstick you see that it’s an acceptable amount. He buys you a drink to continue the conversation you’ve already started, but when the night ends, he doesn’t pick up the tab you had started before he sat down. Splenda! Salt! That’s what Tumblr will tell you. I say wait. You spend some time texting. He says he wants to take you out. This is when we find out what kind of man he is by analyzing a few things:
Where does he want to meet? TGIFridays or one of the best restaurants/bars in the city. Look at where he wants to take you and why. If he asks you where you want to eat and then shoots it down because it’s overpriced or “just not his scene” you have two options: dig your heels in or run. My first meeting with Bentley took some time to plan because he shot down the restaurants that I chose as not being good enough for a first date. It was a good first sign.
How and what do they order? We know what a man who doesn’t want to spend a lot of money looks like when he orders at a restaurant or bar. He asks if there are any discounts or deals. Asks what’s the best and cheapest drink or food item on the menu. Makes “jokes” about how expensive everything is.
How do they look when you order? A man that asks if you want anything else after you’ve decided what you want is a keeper. A man that asks what you want scans the menu and then asks if you’re sure you want those things or if you’d be happy with something cheaper presents you with two options: to dig your heels in or run.
What are they talking to you about? A man that talks about sex as soon as he meets you only wants you for one thing and it ain’t playing cards. Now, if he’s willing to compensate you for that time in a way that you find acceptable, fine. Get your money girl. If you want a man that cares about you as an individual but he can’t stop talking about how well he’s doing on Viagra, you have two options. Dig in or run. I suggest you run, but this is your life, not mine
When the date is over, look at this man’s behavior. You’ll know if he’s the type of man that you can keep in your life. If he isn’t, let him go. LET HIM GO! Don’t, please friend, don’t hang on to a man because you don’t think that you’ll be able to get another. This game isn’t for the desperate that need quick cash because their life is falling apart. This is going to take time. You’ll find yourself getting dressed up and going out quite a few times before you find a man that you’re willing to stick with. If you understand this from the beginning, that reaching any goal is going to take time, you’ll be far less likely to fail.
You do have one thing on your side. Men know that it is their responsibility to take care of the women in their lives. Vanilla men know this. They know. I’m going to say it one more time, best friend so it really sinks in. All men know that it is their responsibility to take care of the women in their lives. What’s more, they know that the younger and better looking a woman is, the more they will have to spend. Your job is not to convince a man to spend money on you. He already knows he should. Your job is to separate the men willing to spend from the men not willing to spend by opening up your mouth and talking about what you want. Talk about college and the class that you’re going to be taking, but god isn’t it crazy how expensive books are? Talk about how much you love to write, but your laptop broke. Talk about how you want to get into digital photography but don’t know what camera to get or if you can afford to buy one. Give it a couple weeks. The right man will show up with a laptop, or an iPad, or a book, or a camera or whatever it is you say you need. The wrong man won’t have made it past the first date.
Happy hunting, best friend.
Best friend, be honest, what did you think? Do you think you could ever get off the sugar sites? Go free styling? Do you think my approach makes any sense or is something that could work for you? Leave me a comment and let me know so we can talk about it.
So I have decided to post all the facts and hints about Connor Murphy’s past that are shown in the musical. It’s hard to make out considering people in the fandom usually focus on the lies Evan tells to figure out Connor’s personality.
To get this conclusion (which I will post in a second) I literally skipped all scenes concerning Evan’s lies and went directly to the Murphy family and what they say. None of these facts/hints involve what Evan said about Connor.
First of all, I’ll say now that I have put my own interpretation on each of these facts.
And so, I will put all FACTS in BOLD. Anything out of bold is my own interpretation and how I see it to be. It’s up to you to agree with me or disagree.
First, I will post my conclusions on each family member, and then afterwards, I will post the reasons for each one.
Zoe was an emotional and verbal abuse
victim.There is no evidence of physical abuse, although there were
threats that could have potentially led to that. She has all the
right to not grieve over Connor, in all honesty, she could have sent
him to the police for what he did, but as an abuse victim, that is
very hard to do. Connor was probably the cause of most of her
insecurities and she hated him for that. The unhealthy habit of
taking out his anger on the nearest person to him probably made him
lash out at his sister whenever he had a panic attack. Judging by how
he really did care enough to keep the creepy letter about his sister,
written by Evan, in his pocket for 3 days before he committed
suicide, it’s safe to say that he really regretted being mean to his
sister and actually cared about her.
Connor’s mom, Cynthia
Connor’s mom was a woman obsessed with
reputation. She’s known as the rich man’s wife, and wants more than
anything to be a regular family. But because her son had mental
illnesses, her perfect image was ruined. She acted as though she was
there for him but when it came down to it, she did nothing. She
pushed for therapy but after a while, her husband took him out of it
because “it wasn’t worth the money,” and she basically went,
“welp, I tried.” I will quote what I say later: Connor’s mom
might not actually be sad that her son is gone, but rather, she’s
ashamed that her family actually doesn’t care. It seems like Connor’s
mom is filled with regret for not being there for her son, and she’s
forcing her family to act like they regretted it too, because that’s
what a real family should have been like. But this is only a personal
Connor’s dad, Larry
Connor’s dad might be one of the main
sources of his depression. It is very obvious to me that Connor’s dad
believed him to be a disappointment.He didn’t grieve for his dead
son and only played along to make his wife happy. He’s annoyed by the
whole situation. It even seemed like he hated the fact that there was
fake remnants of his son in Evan. Almost like he wished Connor wasn’t
friends with Evan so he could just forget all about him and not need
to deal with it. At some point he was a kind father. When they went
to the orchard together for picnics, it seems like they were a happy
family. Connor’s dad had played with their toy plane together and had
some great memories. The whole family practically forgot about this,
though. Connor’s dad didn’t cry at his own dead son’s funeral. I
think that sums it up.
Connor was a complicated person. He had
many different mental illnesses. I could research which ones he
probably had, but there’s probably already a post somewhere on it
already. One thing for sure, is that he was unstable. He might not
have been like that his whole life, but at the time of knowing him,
the time he was briefly alive in the show, he was incredibly
unstable. Everything and anything could set him off, and he probably
hated that about himself as well. Pushing away everyone near him that
could possibly help and hating himself for doing so, spiraling
himself into a closed minded world of self-hate and regret, which is
something that many people can relate to, including me. He did a lot
of horrible things to his sister and to his family. I don’t blame his
family for not actually grieving him, he was a really bad person. The
problem is, he could have been a good person as well. He had all the
potential to get better. He talked to Evan, probably wishing to say
sorry about pushing him earlier in the hall. He was trying, he wanted
to try. He wanted to get better. He just gave up too soon.
This post is very long! I’m sorry. If you’d like to read more, I’m putting the reasons I’ve come to these conclusions under the cut.
Remember, ALL FACTS ARE IN BOLD. Anything else is my personal interpretation.
Supernatural Preferences: Finding out you've got severe depression
Trigger warning!: If you have problems with mentions of self harm and suicidal thoughts, don’t read or read with caution.
Sam: When depression came a’ knockin and literally all hope seemed to be flushed down the drain, you finally turned to Sam seeking help. His initial instinct was complete and utter fear. For both himself and for your life. You meant so much to him, and the thought that you were on the verge/trying to take your life broke him down. How was he supposed to live on without being a constant in his not so normal life? For his sake and most importantly yours, he kept you at his side like a shadow. Making sure every second of every day was spent showing you how important your life was and that you were here on this dammed earth for a reason.
Dean: You always acted so tough and brick walled around Dean. Trying to match his badass outer appearance (honestly he was like that inside too. Except the soft and squish center). So when you approached him and explained how you were weak and couldn’t bare anything anymore, he was at shock that he was hearing it from you. Never expecting you to be in such a horrible position. “That’s a load of shit. You’re one of the strongest people I’ve ever known, and I’m damn proud to have you in my life. That’s the hard truth.” He gave you a big hearted speech while trying is best not to cry.
Cas: From the start of your downfall into the darkness of depression, Cas knew something was wrong with you. At first he thought you might have been sick because of your ill acting. But after time he realized it was much more and a much deeper sickness than that. When it came down to it, he was the one that confronted you about it all. “Why didn’t you tell me what was going on?” He asked looking so hurt and sad that you were so mentally distraught. “You’re perfect in almost every sense to me, Cas. I felt ashamed to tell you how tainted I was.” He wouldn’t even let you finish replying to him before he pulled you in for a tight hug. “Y/n, I am far from perfect. But you- I could never see you as anything but just that…perfect.”
Crowley: Maybe it started around the same time Crowley began to withdraw a bit from your presence. Maybe it all came to view when ‘work’ became even the slightest bit more important. Either way you felt like a hopeless piece of shit and he wasn’t anywhere to be found. The day came when you broke down to him, yelling at how you couldn’t take it anymore. How you couldn’t take another day being in this god awful body and life. He immediately dropped everything. The Winchesters. Deals. Everything. Whether he blamed himself for partially pushing you think far into this mind set or not, he was there for you unconditionally.
Chuck: He caught you bawling your eyes out at three am. Debating on whether or not to take this life you called pathetic. A blade was in your right hand, and a shaky fist in another. He instantly took the blade from you before you even knew of his presence. “You can’t just force me to live! I can’t do this anymore and you don’t know what it’s like living with my mind. Your God-fucking God. Take it away, make the pain stop so I can be free and happy again to live…” each word you spoke drove into his heart like a blade. Sure he was God, but he couldn’t, and wouldn’t, just take away apart of you. Sure the part sucked, and it was a real life threatening pain in the ass. But he had his own cure for it. “Where are we going?” You asked as he took your hand and led you out off the floor. “To take a look at everything beautiful in the world. It always helps me. But this right here, this is the most beautiful thing that was ever created.” The two of you stood before a mirror, looking at your teary eyed reflection.
Gabriel: The moment you began to act even the slightest bit of odd, he knew. Whether it was a cold or just a bad mood from a period. He knew. So it was no surprise that he figured it off right from the bat that you were struggling daily with pretty much all will to do anything. “Come on kid. You’re badass with a capital A-S-S. I saw you stand up to my bag of dicks brother all for me, you can stand up for yourself all the same.”
Lucifer: Lets just say that it took you awhile to feel comfortable being an open, honest emotional human with the Devil. So telling him “hey, sorry I’m a pain in the ass. But that level of pain assery just upgraded to level depression.” That was how you practiced it all in your head. Of course it came out nothing like that. In fact, you opened your mouth to tell him exactly how your mind and heart were cooperating and he kissed you. For a split moment he silenced every demon lurking in your mind. “Whatever you need me, tell me. You won’t have to ask twice.” He was more than understanding if the feeling of hidden isolation you were going through. “I just need you. I need you to hold on and please not let go. No matter what.” Every word you spoke was mumbled into his chest that he held you into. Yes, the Devil himself was even so caring for just his one not so irritating and worthless specimen of human life.
Exo: shimmie shimmie kokobop; high af mv; every other song on the album is a bop; i have no idea how this album/mv has a connection to the war; awful hairstyles; too many vibrant colors; what’s going on with lay; still not enough sehun lines
Bts:not today happened; love yourself is happening; seriously who can keep up with all those insane theories; every western artist want to collaborate with them; gyeonwo chong jojun balsa; still waiting for them jin lines and screentime; let jhope hold another v live without asking for other members
Ikon: alright since my earlier post ikon and winner totally switched positions; ikon where? somewhere in the basement; give them proper promotion; no more badass hiphop comebacks pls; i miss the team b era; i feel like all their predebut tracks were better; b-day is alright; btw what the hell are these new stage names; EVERYONE I LOVE IKON DON’T HATE ME
Got7: all their songs feel like a mess musically; give them songs that showcase their talents; something like the latest jj project release; bitch we had to wait 5 years for that jjp masterpiece; i honestly like trilogies but not got7’s; why y’all think jackson’s gonna leave got7; hard carry by monsta x is still hilarious
Winner: so yg rememberd they exist; i absolutely love their newer side (really really, island); thank you for not having a summer ballad; have you people realized what a gem jinwoo’s voice is; happy for namtae for his new band; sorry for namtae for struggling with mental illness; leave the boy alone don’t hate him for no reason; dude is really really an artist
Day6: thank you for spoiling us with good music every month; although i prefer their debut era, i think this is their true sound; but songs sound a bit same; still underappreciated; miss their buskings; thought jae is gonna take a longer twitter hiatus but gladly no; miss his hashtags; stop bullying wonpil 2k17; still no lines for dowoon
Astro:baby was not my style; but eunwoo is still a living god; stop growing sanha 2k17; still waiting for a more mature concept; mature, not sexy, no need to reveal anything; although they did it already
Seventeen: maaan their al1 album once again is a masterpiece; so mature; love the hiphop units new sound; the choreo dang; did you pay attention to joshua’s part? that dance is wow; minimal rap i like it; wainting for european dates within their world tour; hoshi rocked the orange hair; and woozi the red; too much hair damage
Vixx: they are one of my bias groups but not gonna lie, i hate shangri la; although a unique concept; use airconditioners or fans or whatever when they’re performing, no more fainting pls; but the lr comeback is here; such a 180 turn from beautiful liar; aesthetic mv; listen to beautiful night(?) it’s amazing; lr is amazing
Shinee: nothing new for them; thought they were one of the few groups without scandals; guess what i was wrong; take care onew; they need a comeback asap
Infinite: nothing since last october; hoya pls sign that contract ir i’m gonna flip tables; infinite with a unique sound and choreography; the choreo needs hoya; don’t want them to enter military, no, not yet; pls have an ot7 comeback
Monsta x:beautiful happened, shine forever happened BUT WHERE IN DAFUQ IS THEIR FIRST WIN????; a lipton commercial summer bop happened; tho i have no idea what does the title has to do with the song; from zero happened, i NEED a studio version; hyungwonho happened; monsta x in hungary didn’t happen; monsta x ray is happening, throw an oscar at them for that drama; i need more hyungwon and siwoo; starship why releasing that dating statement when noone knew anything; let them rest; hyungwon is officially a viral meme; mosta x still happens, hyungKwon also happens
Bigbang:gd’s solo is perfect; another scandal and shit; military service; that’s it
B.A.P: the cover of their latest japanese album is gorgeous; what are those awful hairstyles once again; i was too scared to check out yongguk’s solo; b.a.p in hungary happened; i wasn’t there; i love daehyun’s voice; hope zelo is not growing anymore
Block B: i’m not sure what’s up with them; but block b in hungary happened; without po; and i wasn’t there; miss their older stuff; i want more bastarz; still perverts; still business partners
NCT: not sure where nct 127 is going; cherry bomb was awful, a real mess; if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands is still stuck in my head; wardrobe and hairstyle were better this time; i love nct dream; the chorus from we young is so familiar; sounds like the theme song in the pc game insaniquarium; miss jaemin; where’s nct u; and hansol; give love to doyoung; let mark rest for god’s sake
Pentagon:critical beauty was so weird yet visually satisfying; but this album was my least favourite from them; that wooseok and e’dawn pairing tho; missed yanan; why is there that right before promotions a member is getting injured; triple h happend for good; e'dawn is hot with a lot of tattos; never and energetic are bops; thank you hui
Btob: still so weird; everyone going solo; ballads are in the past bops are back; movie was not my style
Highlight: yaaay they have a new name; i legit thought it’d be bea5t; rookies yet swiping up them music show trophies; sometimes people still call them beast; i was hoping the fandom name was gonna be highlighters
Super Junior: i was anticipating their autumn comeback; but no sungmin; thank you k-„fans”; i’m so happy d&e are back from the military; please love the china line
Nu’est: my babies they are finally getting the spotlight they deserved since their debut; thought pd101 was not gonna do justice for them but hell it did; best choice ever; minhyun finally got a first win; soon is gonna nu’est w; love the meaning behind w; still fucking salty the nation’s producers forgot about jonghyun in the last minute
Ftisland: the more i know them the more i don’t wanna know them; love their freedom in everything-wise; the biggest perverts omg; why were y’all sleeping on wind when it was so important for them and it’s beautiful; sometimes i feel like they want to prove that they are relevant; and they are; 4757857+ years more together pls; WHY DID I SAY PUPPY WAS BAD IT’S A FUCKIN’ BOMB; ftisland in hungary is happening AND I’M FUCKING GONNA BE THERE; jaejin i’m coming
Cnblue: i want to like their korean music but I don’t; last time i forgot they’re giants; yonghwa solo
SF9: 2 comebacks within 2(?) months; bururengnya; the jungle game choreo is jawdropping but it’s not fit for a choreo; easy love was wow; kinda sounds like old kpop; too many taeyang lines; where are jaeyoon’s
KNK:sun moon star was meh; rain is also not my favourite but the mv is wonderful; how to be that extra as they are
Teen top: god dammit love is was pure perfection; it totally gave me old kpop vibes; the dance was on point as expected; like the footwork once again; welcome back teen top
Wanna one: ongniel, winkdeep; jinhwi; jaehwan x minhyun etc, so many ships; wanna one go is hilarious; sungwoons grandfather is amazing; teach jaehwan how to clean; that psychotic laugh tho; i’m still burn it up team; weekly idol with them is… a mess; breaking tv show rating records; god how many music show wins they have already; there is so much more but it’s not a how I see wanna one post
Boyfriend: they just had a korean release; was it a comeback or what; i do love monsta with all my heart but boyfriend still exists if anyone needs a reminder; their evolution throughout the years is insane; they own a special place in my heart cuz they were the group who made me fall in love with kpop; so thank you boyfriend, thank you i yah, thank you hungary, thank you music channel
N.flying: i don’t know much about them, but the real is a great song; go check it out now; the mv is hilarious; i don’t recall whether i ever laughed at a music video; that plot twist omg; jang moonbok as a mermaid; clap clap; if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands
So I just decided to make another ‘How I see kpop groups’ with the same groups, but it’s an updated version. I mean no harm with any of my statements and I think this time I was pretty positive (with a little sarcasm). Last time a I got a few hate comments about my Ikon statements so yeah. I love them. And this time I wasn’t shameless with group promo. I have a link to every song I mentioned so if you don’t know what/who I’m talking about then click the links. Hope it’s as fun as last time. And sorry if I was biased with some groups. Enjoy! :3
Homecoming spoilers. Pin for later when you’ve watched the film. :) I repeat, spoilers. SPOILERS.
Being his best friend, aside from Ned, of course.
Living just across the hall. It was actually how you two met back in the day when he used to visit Aunt May and Uncle Ben.
Struggling and mourning the loss of Uncle Ben, because let’s face it, you adored those two with all your heart. (They used to babysit you whenever your parents needed a last minute babysitter)
Rubbing the fact that Aunt May loves you more (even though she loves you two the same) in Peter’s face.
Enduring all of Aunt May’s larb jokes whenever you join them for Thai.
“I larb you, Peter. And I larb you too, [Y/N]
“Okay, Aunt May…..enough.”
“What? You don’t larb me? Am I too lame to be larbed? Too cool to larb your awesome aunt? Not enough larb to go around to your good ole aunt? Saved all your larb for you one true larb, [Y/N]? Huh? Hm?”
“Uh….we larb you too?”
“Thank you, [Y/N]. At least someone larbs me.”
Being completely supportive of Peter getting an internship with Tony Stark.
Offering to help him with his internship.
Getting slightly offended that he doesn’t want help.
“Am I not smart enough to help you?”
“What? God, no. It’s not that…..it’s um….I just have to do this on my own, that’s all. You know, no help. Strictly myself….”
Competing against him with academic scores.
Being extremely competitive with each other when it came to exams.
Going back and forth on having the highest grade.
Talking about going to the most prestige college and then changing your minds because you two could never leave Aunt May.
Putting up with Ned being needy.
“Ned….this is a date….between two people.”
“Oh cool, I love pizza. I’ll just sit down right here and take a slice.”
“Yeah, so anyway, you two should come over and help me build my lego deathstar. It’s legit.”
Bickering with Ned, constantly. (But, loving him just as much as Peter)
Getting along great with Michelle.
Roasting Peter and Ned into oblivion with her.
Like full on roasts. It’s fantastic how long you and Michelle can go.
I mean, it’s almost not fair how hard you go.
But, in the end, Peter loves you and is sort of relieved that you get along with the people in his life.
Cuddles for days.
Like the kind of cuddles that make you all warm and fuzzy inside.
You know, the ones where you just sigh happily in his arms and think that Disney World ain’t got shit on being the happiest place on earth.
Netflixin’ and chillin’, (if you know what I mean, wink-wink) Forgive me, I forget that’s he’s fifteen. No sir, keep that in your pants now, you little rascal. And you? Don’t be puttin’ out, miss. .
Geeking out over Star-Wars, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, etc.
Going to Comic-Cons and dressing up.
Building and experimenting to the point where Aunt May and your parents scold you two for almost blowing up the complex.
Although, it’s not like you actually could blow up a building to that magnitude.
And after the fire department threatened to arrest you two, you put an end to experimenting.
Peter making you a playlist on your ipod.
Listening to it all the time because you just love the songs he chose.
No seriously, this playlist makes your heart stop with every song.
Peter always getting you your favorite muffin for breakfast before school.
He’ll even leave it at your front door in a cute little handwritten paper bag if he’s sick for the day.
Always being told he loves you.
Because, you’re the best thing that ever happened to him.
You being embarrassed when he tells random strangers that he loves you.
Like, you’ll be walking down the street and he’ll look at the old lady walking her yorkie, “Excuse me, m’am. But, I just want you to know how much I love this girl right here.”
Then flagging down a taxi to tell the driver too. “Hey, yeah no, I don’t need a ride. Just wanna tell you that I love my girlfriend.”
Peter even telling Happy who always responds with, “Can’t wait for the day she leaves you.”
Him keeping his double-agent life a secret.
Because he doesn’t want you to get hurt.
Constantly wondering why Peter’s free time is slowly diminishing. Because you can’t quite believe the internship was that demanding.
Worrying that Peter was going to break up with you.
Peter finding out about your worries through Michelle. (Who threatened to skin him alive should he ever hurt you.)
Taking a night off from his “internship” to take you out.
“Peter….we’ve been on the train forever.”
“Have a little bit of patience, [Y/N].”
“Where are we going? Does Aunt May know you’re out right now? How much longer? Is this going to be forever? Are we running away from our problems? Running from being millennials and trying to fit in with society? I didn’t pack anything. How are we going to survive the outside world?”
Peter intentionally ignoring your million questions by putting his headphone in one ear and other in yours.
Playing your favorite song to keep you quiet.
Realizing he’s taking you to Central Park.
Almost on the verge of tears when you find out that he organized a candlelit picnic under the stars.
Seeing Ned in the distance as he walks away and knowing that he had a hand in it.
Smiling and feeling secure that Peter is here to stay.
Getting a weird feeling that he’s still hiding something.
Unsure of how to go about asking him what he’s hiding because you don’t want to cross a line.
Michelle not caring and confronting him before coming back to you and confirming that he is hiding something because of the way he acted.
Feeling uneasy but forcing yourself to believe that Peter would tell you everything and anything because you two were on the same level and understanding about your relationship.
Using the Washington D.C. trip to curve your mind from it.
It failing when Peter decides to re-join the decathlon team.
Forcing yourself to ignore the gut feeling that Peter is hiding something when you asked him why he decided to re-join.
Peter being completely oblivious to your uneasiness.
Pushing it to the back of your brain when Liz scolds you for not having your head in the game.
But it coming back when Peter doesn’t show up for the decathlon.
Corning Ned and demanding where Peter is and why he isn’t answer his phone.
Getting irritated when Ned stumbles over his words.
Becoming so upset that you tell Ned to tell Peter that he better have an explanation or else they would be over.
Visiting the monument with everyone with the exception of Peter (obviously) and Michelle who passed on the tour.
Ignoring Ned when he tries to talk to you.
Liz concerned that you were upset and asks if you want to talk about it.
About to confide in her when the elevator of the Monument starts to malfunction.
Peter freaking the hell out when Michelle screams, “My friends are up there!”
Panicking and pleading Karen to help him find a way to save you and everyone else.
Trying to stay calm even though your heart is about to flip out of your chest.
Getting mad all over again because you were going to die pissed off at your boyfriend.
Spider Man saving you just in the nick of time.
Being so traumatized over the ordeal and Peter not being there, you lash out on him when he finally decides to make an appearance.
Michelle shaking her head, “You messed up, dude.”
“[Y/N], wait! Please, I can explain.”
“Explain? Explain?! I’m going to need a whole encyclopedia of an explanation, Peter. Can you give me that?
Ned trying to diffuse the situation.
Getting even more pissed off and breaking up with Peter.
Michelle whistling (because she didn’t see it coming), “Man, that’s rough. You gonna be okay? Actually? I don’t care. Bye.” Running after you to make sure you were going to be okay.
Ignoring all of Peter’s texts and phone calls.
Having your parents stop Peter from coming into the apartment even though they felt you were being silly. (They adored Peter)
Sitting in your room with a pint of your favorite ice cream while watching stupid rom-com films.
Crying when the guy gets the girl.
But telling yourself, you’re better than that and that you don’t need Peter.
Crying again because you need Peter.
Hearing a knock on your bedroom door and getting mad because you just know your parents let him in.
Yanking open the door to find a worried Aunt May.
“May? What’s wrong?”
Her coming into your room, “I know you and Peter are fighting right now but have you heard from him?”
“No, I haven’t. I actually haven’t received any texts or calls from him today….”
“Where is he? He’s been gone all day. I’m freaking out, [Y/N]. I’ve called every precinct and coroners office.”
Being speechless because it is very unlike Peter to not check with Aunt May.
Her on the verge of tears, “I can’t loose him too.”
Grabbing your jacket and your phone, hugging Aunt May tight and telling her you’re going to find him.
Spending hours before finding him sulking in hello kitty pajama pants and an awful touristy tshirt.
Awkward tension as you text Aunt May and telling her you found him and that he was on his way up.
Knowing that there was something wrong but not wanting to engage because you were still mad at him
Eventually breaking because you still love him.
“I lost the internship with Tony Stark……”
“I’m so sorry, Peter. I know how much that meant to you.”
Letting him go.
Regretting not hugging him or comforting him.
Going back to your apartment to sulk and eat another pint of ice cream.
Turning on the television to torture yourself with more rom-com’s.
Witnessing Spider Man and Iron-Man save a bunch of people on a ferry.
Dropping your spoon and ice cream as it hits you.
Running into your room to grab your journal. (you wrote daily)
Comparing the dates and times of when Spider Man was spotted and whenever Peter claimed he had the “internship”.
Finding a consistent pattern.
It dawning on you that Peter Parker is Spider Man.
“That little shit!”
Running out of your apartment and across the hall.
Banging on the door.
Aunt May answering with a concerned look.
Ignoring her and pushing past her to go straight into Peter’s room.
Busting in and then closing the door behind you.
Marching straight up to his startled, adorable, puffy eyed self.
Punching him in the arm and then covering his mouth when he lets out a yelp.
“You’re Spiderman?! Spiderman? Seriously? That’s what the internship with Tony Stark was about? What the hell, dude.”
Peter being completely in shock that you found out.
Standing there in complete silence for almost half and hour.
Him finally explaining how it happened.
Understanding why he didn’t want to tell you but still a little salty about it.
“So…..are we okay now?”
“Fine. We’re okay but don’t you ever keep secrets from me ever again.”
Everything going back to normal.
Him showing you all his nifty tricks.
Feeling bad that he got his suit taken away.
Trying to make him feel better by telling him he doesn’t need the suit.
Ned being ecstatic that you know.
Because now he can finally talk about it with someone other than Peter.
Ned not shutting up about it.
Peter showing you a different view of the city.
Planning romantic dinners on roof tops.
Or well, kind of romantic.
It’s mainly subs and sodas.
But it’s the thought that counts, alright.
Making you promise that you will run away whenever something bad happens.
Vowing that he will never let anyone hurt you for as long as he lives because aside from Aunt May, you are the most important person in his life and he does what he does to protect you.
Fuck. I didn’t think I’d get this many people requesting to be tagged. This literally took me forever…..
Zack totally teased the two of them (individually) to get together when he found out the feelings were mutual meanwhile Jason is just tired of all the gushing he gets from Kim about the yellow ranger
Jason: “Kimberly Ann Hart, I swear to god if you don’t ask her out, I’ll-”
Kimberly: “What? Ask her out yourself? She’s not into you. Not even into guys in general. What are you going to threaten me with now, Scott? And how dare you full name me.”
Trini reverted back to using earphones so they could listen to music together, but someone always moved their head too much where the other’s bud always came out so she decided to get a splitter so they could still listen together, but have their individual earphones.
Zack and Jason (reluctantly) bet on who’s going to get their ass wiped during sparring between the girls during training each day because (one of them gets a little too sidetracked)
Their study dates are 20% flashcards and 80% ”if i fail this test tomorrow, you can tell the teacher why, Tri!” “that i couldn’t keep my hands to myself after i finally found your ticklish spot which took so long to find but it was so worth it though it may have resulted in a hole in your wall because you tried blindly kicking at me?”
Trini secretly loves when Kim plays with her hair, especially when she’s had a stressful day
she’ll collapse into her lap and let her do her thing, letting her caress her hair and gently scratch at her scalp
Kim watches her girlfriend go from grumpy cat to lazy sleepy content cat (she totally awes at the accidental purr that comes out)
Kim is the only one that’s allowed to unbraid/braid Trini’s hair
Here’s Kim’s words of advice and reassuring comments to Trini introducing herself as her girlfriend for the first time “Breathe. You’re going to do fine. You’ll be great. Just think about something calming, soothing, relaxing.
“Think about me. Naked.”
Kim willing to fight anyone who insults or harms Trini in anyway and becoming furiously protective
Trini trying to bite back her words of anger and hatred when Amanda and her minions make a harsh snide comment to Kimberly knowing she won’t be able to stop any sort of aggression once it starts
Comforting each other about their
past and current home life
Instead of passing generic notes, they’re either playing tic tac toe, telling one another jokes or Kim drawing mini comics and Trini attempting to continue the story with her stick figures
Kim getting jealous when this new girl starts flirting with Trini and because this oblivious gay can’t tell the difference between a friendly compliment and I’m-trying-to-ask-you-out-on-a-date compliment, she unknowingly flirts back
Trini getting jealous when Jason asks if he can talk to Kimberly in private, when Kimberly cancels their plans because she promised to hang out with him and when Jason let’s it slip that Kim visits him in his room at night to talk about things that are troubling instead of talking to her
Kim volunteering to babysit Trini’s brothers with her
Discussing/”Making Up” stories about the Power Rangers with them
Trading embarrassing stories about Trini
Shyly but trying to act intimidating as they interrogate Kim to see if she’s good enough for their sister
Innocently asking if Kim and Trini are dating
Teasingly throwing the girlfriend word around the girls
Them and Kim getting competitive with one another during video games
Talking about their favorite superheroes as they show her their action figures
Questioning her if she believes in aliens
Kim sitting next to Trini or in front of her during Biology so they can reach under the desk and hold hands, y’know whisper in one another’s ears like losers, doodle in each other’s margin on their notebooks
Sneaking into each other’s rooms through the window
Both calming the other down after a nightmare
Kim stealing all of Trini’s flannels, jackets, hoodies. (Beanies are harder to get though she managed to steal her yellow one and replaced it before she was caught.)
Trini occasionally borrowing one of Kim’s shirts/tops
Trini staring at Kim’s lips when she talks
Kim glancing at Trini’ lips when they’re sitting or standing too close
Playfully bickering on who gets to be the big spoon always even though they switch it up all the time
Being able to keep up with each other’s snark, wit, sass, and sarcasm
Knowing smug smirks
Amused arched eyebrows
Challenging one another
Trini resting her head on Kim’s shoulder
Kim resting her head atop of Trini’s
Trying out different cafés, bakeries, patisseries, coffee shops and learning and eventually knowing each other’s orders at all of them
jokes, innuendos, pick up lines, teasing, banter
eye rolls all the time
exaggerated eyelash batting
Kim flirtatiously winking
pleading pouting lips
Fake offended gasp
hugs from behind
Kim leaning her chin on top of Trini’s head or her shoulder
both being easily whipped and persuaded/convinced by the other
whispering sweet nothings before saying something dumb and stupid and playfully insultful to get rid of the cheesy, sappy, sentiment
Trini judging Kim’s music tastes and both of them trying to find a common genre
Finding places with the best views of the town/taking each other on random adventures
Late night car rides with the windows down
They frequent the cliff edge that overlooks the lake (swimming hole?) for a good view of the lights
If Trini can convince Kim to go hike up the mountain together in the morning, they watch the sunrise, but usually they watch the sunset after school/training
Drive In Movie Theater which either results in Kim being totally invested and Trini taking a nap or having a popcorn catching contest
They always share the last donut and have a showdown on who gets the last piece
Taking selfies in those In N Out hats when they go out for burgers
Trini finds Kim singing into a hairbrush and dancing around her room one day as she blasts Top 40 Pop Songs
It takes roughly about 15 seconds to get her to begrudgingly join in
But she’s just in awe at the girl’s voice and so is Kim when Trini starts singing
They’re both panicking
Racing one another just for fun (of course where no one will see)
Behind the bleachers, rooftop, girl’s bathroom on the second floor or in a quiet vacant hidden corner in the library is where you’ll find them alone ditching class and being unusually couple-ish (The janitor’s closet was just downright disgusting and smelled of cheap chlorine bleach and sanitizer even with their superhuman powers, chemicals still had some effect on their body)
Squeezing each other’s hand for comfort or reassurance along with rubbing their thumb over one another’s knuckles
Trusting one another more than anyone
taking turns resting their head on the other’s chest
Trini resting her head in Kimberly’s lap as she’s sprawled out on the couch
Zack giving Kimberly the shovel talk and Jason giving Trini the shovel talk even though they care for both girls
It’s a ridiculously lovable somewhat annoying act
Trini calling Kim “Princess”
kissing one another’s palms and wrists
both being in utter awe that someone as amazing and beautiful wants to date them
rubbing soothing circles on one another’s hands when the other gets nervous/anxious
Kim tracing abstract patterns on Trini’s back when she’s sleeping
long walks or hiking up those mountain trails
talking to each other all night and even when one falls asleep the other doesn’t hang up the phone, lovesick idiots
When Kim asks Trini what she did to get into detention this time, if she isn’t sending a death glare towards Zack and groaning like she’s suffering through hell and back, she just gives a sheepish smile and a nonchalant shrug because she’s not going to admit that she volunteers to go to this and the teacher could care less
Kim’s mirror is covered in polaroids and Trini has a secret album
Trini finding out that Kim can do an absolutely believable flawless British accent (you figure out the details)
Kim mouthing the lines to movies and tv shows and Trini’s not even paying attention to the screen anymore like always
God forbid, they have hidden poetry/song books about one another that neither of have told them about.
Kim complimenting Trini all the time just to see her blush
The only time they will ever carry each other without being a stumbling blushing mess or arguing over the position in carrying is when one of them is injured or asleep
Star Gazing on top of Kim’s roof
They totally had the same idea of kissing in the rain even though they both know it’s a fricking cliche because a) they can’t get sick and b) they’re saps and hopeless romantics even if they won’t admit it
Having a snowman contest
Kim pushing Trini into the pool and Trini pulling her in with her
Kim booping Trini on the nose and Trini is just bewildered
They take turns bringing each other drinks and donuts for breakfast during the school week (Jason scolds them about needing to eat a healthier breakfast)
They meet up before first period then always text each other before their next classes/during passing periods/hallway traffic jam to complain or give them a heads up about things instead of walking one another to class
Stealing from another’s food during lunch
though it turns more into a game of sorts
Whoever gets out earlier from class waits by the other’s locker after school
Let’s just say the Rangers can’t get drunk so they inevitably try to drink themselves to death, but a body shot and a lap dance ensues
“Do you trust me?”
“Not with my water bottle and definitely not over a cliff.”
“If she goes, I go.”
“You’re an idiot.”
“That’s just your way of telling me, you love me. I’ve cracked that code a long time ago, Hart.”
“Will you please just shut up for a second and stop doubting yourself and listen to me! You’re beautiful.”
“Why did we agree to play Seven Minutes in Heaven?”
“Did they just tell us to go fuck in a closet?”
“The irony hasn’t escaped me.”
“I hate this town. I hate these faces. I’m just so tired of everything, except you. Never you.”
“You’re not short,you’re just tiny.”
“I don’t remember falling in love with you. I just remember you grabbing onto my hand and squeezing way too hard when we were about to be pummeled to our deaths by a train and in that terrifying second I couldn’t process anything except a single thought which was, “You’re dying just admit you’re gay and pretty girls make you weak.”
“You’ve been shutting everyone out that genuinely cares about you”
“Not everyone, not you.”
“Do you think the world could suddenly end on a night as quiet as this?”
“Let me ask you something. Do you think there’s such a thing as a perfect day?”
“A perfect day. Start to finish. When nothing terrible or sad or ordinary happens. Do you think it’s possible?”
“We spend our whole lives stuck in the labyrinth, thinking about how we’ll escape one day, and how awesome it will be, and imagining that future keeps us going, but we’ll never do it. We just use the future to escape the present. Truth is, we’ll never actually be rid of Angel Grove, we’re still Power Rangers and just like any other superhero we’ll end up staying exactly where we are. Unfortunately our home isn’t a city.” “Well, at least it has you.”
“You were not meant to simply be pretty. You were meant to fight back, so get up and face it.”
“What’s inside is what matters. You are so much smarter than they give you credit for.”
“I am aware that I am less than some people prefer me to be, but most people are unaware that I am so much more than what they see.”
“I feel lost inside myself.”
“I’m not perfect, but I’m original.”
“Tell me every terrible thing you ever did and let me love you anyway.”
“The happiest people, don’t have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything.”
“Perhaps, I want nothing more than to fall asleep next to you.”
“My life will end someday and so will yours, hopefully we die roughly around the same age, not that I want you to die ever but I don’t want you suffering of heartbreak like some depressing Hallmark movie so just kiss me anytime.”
“Thank you, for making me feel less alone.”
“I stopped explaining myself when I realized people only understand from their level of perception.”
“You are alive. You are not a sad story.”
“I love you, but don’t know what to do.”
“You can’t love someone unless you love yourself first.” Bullshit.
I have never loved myself.
Oh god, I loved you so much I forgot what hating myself felt like.”
“Why did you do that?”
“Because I love you.”
“I would never let anybody or anything hurt you.”
“I don’t know for sure what I’m feeling. I don’t think you know exactly what you’re feeling either. This is all new or maybe we’ve felt this way for quite sometime, but refused to acknowledge them. What I do know is that, whatever mutual feelings we have for one another is not going to jeopardize our friendship.We’re not going to let that happen.”
“Just talk to me.”
“What is wrong with you?”
“I’m crazy, remember?”
Kim noticing that Trini has bad social anxiety especially when she’s seated or standing in a public closed in crowd so she always makes it a priority to get seats near the windows in the corner or a seat where Trini’s back is covered
Kim trying to learn Spanish on her own not just to impress Trini (that’s just an added bonus) but to make it easier for Trini’s brothers and dad to communicate with her. She manages to even impress Trini’s mom and manages to have forge somewhat of an acquaintanceship, but she’s still wary.
A/N: This was a request from @ihavetwobuckystomyname a very long time ago, and I’m super sorry that this took so long to write, hun! I hope you enjoy it! There’s a song that goes to this as well and it’s right here if you wanna listen!
Body Language - Reader and Bucky have been in a relationship for a while, and she’s ready to take the relationship to the next level. But Reader has a small problem: she’s deaf.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Deaf Reader
Warnings: Smut. Language. Slight mentions of past neglect. Bucky being adorable. NSFW!
The first time it happens he almost forgets about it afterward – how couldn’t he with Cas dying. But now that he thinks about it he distinctly remembers the way the words slipped from his tongue, the way he desperately tried to put them back in.
“… devastatingly handsome friend…” – yeah, he had fucked up then. Thankfully, no one had said anything, and he wouldn’t be Dean Winchester if he couldn’t bullshit his way through, pretending to actually be Cas’ wing man.
It was almost a blessing that Cas was busy dying that evening because the thought of him hitting up with Mandy still leaves a sour taste in his mouth.
The next time it’s at a restaurant and the waitress is obnoxious and weird and definitely not cute, so he has to say something, right? Right?
“Want some dessert, sweetheart?” she asks, her eyes never once leaving Cas.
“Actually, he doesn’t need dessert, he’s already sweet enough,” Dean answers for Cas and takes pride in the way her smile falters for a moment. Sam doesn’t comment, so Dean takes it as a success.
(And if Cas complains on the drive home that he actually wanted dessert, well, that’s not his fault.)
After that, it’s a competition, a compulsion, to indulge in the flirtations only for as long as it takes to make it clear that Cas is his. Not that he is, not really, but no one needs to know that.
It’s not like Cas will ever see these women again. Really, he’s just doing him a service because Cas certainly doesn’t want to have regrettable one night stands right? Right.
Dean comes across as an asshole more times than once, but he doesn’t care. The incidents are numerous, both a reminder how hot Cas actually is (not that he particularly needs one) and a reminder how much fate hates him.
“Hey, beautiful, what can I bring you?” – “Well, my stunningly beautiful friend here” (the emphasis is important) “Likes his coffee black, as I would know.”
“Care to show me where you got that tie from? And maybe wanna show me how to put it on?” – “Actually, if you want to know, I put it on for him, every day, thank you.”
“Hey, you think you could give me the phone number of your sexy friend over there?” – “Sure. It’s 1234-FUCKOFF. Want me to write it down?”
Okay, that last time had been at a bar, with Cas and Sam sitting on the far edge in a corner booth, and that was probably better for all because no way he could have spun that into just a snarky remark, a humorous attempt to one-up her. Not that he wanted to, what did the bartender think she was?
The next time, the waitress doesn’t back down. It’s on the time they walk into the bar; he can see her watching Cas hungrily and coming over almost immediately after they sat down.
“Hey guys,” she waves at them before turning her attention completely on Cas. “What can I get you, sugar?”
“Coffee, black, no sugar. At all.” Dean doesn’t even try to hide his discontent.
“Oooh,” she says and pretends to adjust her name tag – Mandy, another proof that fate was out to get him –, effectively pushing her breasts out of the shirt. Or maybe that’s just his jealousy, who knows. Bottom line, she’s definitely attractive and he prays to God that Cas isn’t interested.
“I see now,” Mandy continues. “You need something else to sweeten up your day, right?”
Cas’ first instinct is to look at Dean, bless him, so that gives Dean the chance to retort: “Oh no, he’s already sweet enough. More and he’ll get diabetes and you don’t want that, right, honey?” His voice is dripping with sarcasm now.
Sam clears his throat. “I want – ” he starts but Mandy interrupts him.
“Why don’t we let your friend” (and this emphasis was clearly uncalled for) “decide what he wants?” she asks sourly.
Still none the wiser, Cas looks at the menu and up to Mandy. “Dean is right, I don’t like sugar in my coffee,” he says. Sam snorts.
This isn’t the end of this – far from it. Every time she comes back, she has another cheap flirtation on her lips and every time Dean has to scramble up the best retorts. It’s getting annoying and, frankly, frustrating, because by now she must have realized that Cas is taken?
(Well, not taken, but definitely not available.)
But she seems completely unfazed and, Dean is sure of it, almost fascinated by the competition. The worst part is at the end; she brings them two bills – Sam and Dean together, Cas’ coffee on a separate one – and even from across the table Dean can see that she wrote her number down on it, complete with a heart and all.
“Hey,” he says before he can stop it.
“What?” she asks innocently. “Did you guys want separate bills, too?”
“No, actually, I wanted to pay for Cas’ coffee.”
“Oooh,” she says for the second time in the day and Dean feels the urge to slap something, a brick wall, a pillow, a kitten, something. She taps her finger against her cheek, seemingly trying to understand the situation. “So you bring a chaperon to all your dates? That’s not classy.” She winks at Sam and lays down the other bill in front of him.
Well, if she thinks that insinuating he’s gay is going to make him back off then oh boy she’s got the wrong target. Right now, Dean is so fucking exasperated that she’s still trying to get in Cas’ pants that he would scream ‘I’m fucking gay for Cas’ from the roof tops, so he almost shouts: “Oh, no, no such thing. We’re well past the dating stage, sweety.”
Which is the stupidest thing in the history of stupid things he’s ever said – because that’s not innuendo, that’s not even remotely true, and he can feel Sam roll his eyes and say “Dude!” at the same time that Cas tilts his head to look at him confused.
At least that makes Mandy shut up, if only for a while until she regains her snark and says: “Must be one hell of a relationship then where you don’t even kiss each other one time in two hours.”
(Which, true, he should have thought that through.)
“So if you’re interested in… pursuing something better for you, I’ve got just the thing,” she continues, tapping on Cas’ bill and that’s enough, that’s fucking enough, he’s had it with this bullshit, so he stands up and runs the two steps to Cas’ chair, violently jerking him upwards and planting a kiss on his mouth.
He can hear Sam mumbling and Mandy exclaiming ohmygod and also, most importantly, he can hear Cas sighing and feel him smiling and deepening the kiss, and – ohmygod, they’re actually kissing, and his anger dissolves almost immediately. Cas is kissing back and he seems happy and right now, Dean couldn’t care less about Mandy and Sam and all the other customers who are probably wondering what the fuck just happened.
They break apart after what seems like an eternity and Dean can’t hide his smug grin. Sam’s face is buried in his hands and Cas calmly puts a few bills from his pocket on the table. “I’ll pay for both. Keep the change.”
Fuck, Cas is actually almost as sassy as him, and that just makes Dean love him even more.
It was a lie. Saying that I didn’t need him anymore was a complete lie. I wanted to have my older brother around. I wanted him to protect me like the knight in shining armour he once was. But having me around him is probably making his life more difficult, and he doesn’t need that. He doesn’t need his annoying younger sister who does nothing but cause trouble. He doesn’t need, me.
We stood there in silent. I still had tears cascading down my face. He looked at me, his eyes welling up with tears too. What have I done? It was never my intention to make him cry.
Warnings: Objectification of reader (sorta - he means well), Implied smut, smut, Dry Humping, Oral (69), unsafe sex (wrap it before you tap it), training kink (is that a thing?), rough(ish) sex, NSFW gifs under the cut.
Word Count: 3500ish
A/N: This is me proving to myself I still remember how to smut. I haven’t written anything smutty for the longest of times and I have been feeling like it lately. It was harder than I thought getting back into the saddle though. Sorry if it is a bit rough - pun not intended.
It is somewhat inspired by the Ed Sheeran song Shape of You - and maybe a little by the video too.
***My fics are not to be saved nor posted on any other sites without my express written permission.***
“Fuck,” she breathed out, instantly drawing Jensen’s attention. He was sprawled out his couch, waiting for Y/N to return to his side. It was movie night and she hadn’t bothered leaving the room to take the phone call. Jensen never eaves dropped and even if he was to overhear something it wouldn’t matter. There was nothing to two of them hid from each other. Literally nothing.
They had both been single for a while and some drunken night they had come to the conclusion, that helping each other blow off some steam when either of them needed it was much prefered from picking up some random dude or chick at a bar.
“If you want I am game,” Jensen teased her, throwing her his best Dean smirk, making her eyes roll so hard he was sure Jared would hear it across the hall from Jensen’s apartment.
“It’s not funny, Jensen! They offered me the part. I’m gonna be Wonder Woman,” she complained, making Jensen shoot from the couch and wrap her in his arms, spinning her around the air not caring one bit about her objection.
“That’s amazing Y/N/N,” he laughed putting her down but not releasing her from his hold, “what are you so worried about?” Jensen gently stroked her hair away from her face, studying her face and trying to figure out why she wasn’t over the moon about this. She had a tendency to overthink things. He knew that. He literally spent 2 hours on the floor of her bedroom leaning against her bathroom door trying to talk her out after the first night they had slept together.
“Alright, class,” The teacher spoke up,
grabbing everyone’s attention. “Hence today is Valentine’s Day, I thought I’d
give you all a short, small quiz!”
The announcement was met with a collective
“It’s not that kind of quiz.” The teacher
began handing out papers, a smile on their face. “It’s about love and even
though it won’t get graded, try to answer the question seriously, don’t joke
Request: I saw you asked for prompts. This one is pretty smutty. Can
you do one where Sebastian and the reader are roommates and she comes home and
catches him jerking off, which leads to more. Or if not Sebastian, then one of
his characters. Thank you love your writing!
Pairing: Lance Tucker x Reader
Warnings: GRAPHIC SMUT, sub and dom relationship, little bit of fluff
Word Count: 2067
A/N: gimme a lance anon. i need it. i wrote this at school at someone stopped to read it and it was at the dirtiest part.
Lance Tucker was a pain to live with. He left dirty boxers
on the floor and had no idea how to wash a dish. And not to mention the
plethora of women he had exiting his room each night. He was your classic
athlete. He could get all the girls and would never have to spend a night
alone. Why you were living with him, you had no idea. He had been your best
friend since you had moved to that small little town when you were six. You
were there for him at every trial and you cheered his name as he won the gold
and silver medals at the Olympics.
He didn’t know that you had a huge crush on him. You would
never tell him. He wasn’t the type of man to do relationships. It hurt that you
had to hear him fuck a different whore every night. None of the women he ever
brought back were classy. In all honesty, they disgusted you. They sounded like
pornstars or strangled ducks, but you still stayed with Lance. You would rather
have him as a friend than nothing at all.
You were not looking forward to the sleepless night ahead.
Work had been kicking your ass and today your boss yelled at you for no reason.
You didn’t even get to drink your coffee, which was the most tragic thing of
all. You slowly trudged your way up the steps to your shared home. In no way
were you ready for the night. All you wanted to do was pamper yourself, but
Lance’s fuck of the night would probably ruin that for you.
Summary: A look at the reader through Dean’s eyes, focusing mostly on Dean’s emotions throughout the day and how he reacts to even the simplest of words. This is the raw and vulnerable side of Dean.
A/N: I haven’t written something like this, I think ever before. It’s heavily focused on Dean (especially since it’s his POV). Even so, the reader is a huge part of it, but once again, through Dean’s perspective on the matter. Hopefully, you love it. I spent a long time on it, trying to really get into Dean’s head. It’s not the light side of Dean, not many jokes or wise cracks – it’s him in his raw emotional state. Also, this would not be possible with @thefangirllifeismine who not only corrected all of my shitty grammar, but stayed an inspiration throughout. Please, send in your feedback. It’s extremely important to me, I’d love to hear what you thought about this, especially since it’s definitely different from what I usually post.
– – – –
Her lips were moving, but my eyes were stuck on her hair. It was wet, and dripping a river down her shirt. I don’t think a towel ever touched her head.
“Dean?” Her voice was warm, inviting. It always was. She was never harsh with her words. Sam constantly tried to poke at her, just to see what her voice would sound like if she raised it.
“Yeah?” I met my eyes with hers, catching her gaze.
I felt my brother’s eyes on me as well; his brow was raised and a smirk played on his face.
“We were asking if you wanted to go to the bar tonight.” Sam filled me in.
A laugh came up from my throat as I raised the glass of whiskey in my hand. “I’m fine right here.”
Y/N smiled and looked at Sam, “You’re still in, right?”
He nodded and got up from his chair. “I’ll go shower.”
I tipped my glass in response, and took another swig from it.
“Have you been out in the sun?” Y/N asked, suddenly.
I furrowed my brows, “I was working on Baby earlier, why?” Then, proceeded to lift up my shirt and smell it. “Do I smell that bad?”
“No,” She let out a light laugh, “Your freckles are darker.”
“My- my freckles?”
She leaned forward in her seat, her nose a mere foot from mine, “Freckles get darker in the sun.”
“Huh.” I muttered and took another sip of my drink.
“It’s cute, Dean.” She said and the whiskey managed to go down even slower. My lip twitched upwards.
Without waiting for me to respond, she gathered her hair to the side and wiped her now wet hands off on her jeans before jumping out from her seat.
“I’ll go change for the bar. Invite’s still open.” She smiled, turning on her heel.
I watched her leave, shamelessly.
The first time Sam and I met her, it was an accident. Neither of us knew we had been working the same case, so when I approached who I thought was the legitimate FBI agent on the case, Y/N’s face beamed back at me instead. After a few back and forth questions, the three of us discovered none of us were agents, and went to grab drinks instead. It was supposed to be a one time deal.
But, one night turned into two. Eventually, three. In no time, I was helping her bring boxes into the bunker from the trunk of her run down car.
“We can’t let anything happen to her, you know that right?” Sam said to me the night she moved in. The shower water was running loudly, and in that noise, we had a discussion.
“I know.” I replied to my little brother. Worry etched itself into every wrinkle on his face, just like it did on our mother’s. He would never know just how much he looked like her.
“That means relationships, too.” Sam narrowed his eyes at me.
I looked away, forgetting how easily he was able to read me.
He continued speaking, “Everyone we get too close to…”
Sam never did finish his sentence. The shower water shut off abruptly and out bounced Y/N. Her face was flushed and her hair dripped down her bare shoulders.
My thoughts were interrupted as Sam strided into the room.
“You sure you’re not coming?” He asked, cuffing up the sleeves to his shirt.
It was tempting. I knew the bar had better whiskey than the shit that was currently burning its way down my throat. Better yet, the bar had Y/N. Whenever she entered a bar, I could see everyone’s attention land on her. Her warmth radiated through her big eyes and genuine smile. Who wouldn’t be attracted to that?
“Nope,” I shrugged, “Not tonight.”
He nodded his head and walked towards the door, waiting for Y/N to meet him there.
“See you.” Sam shouted, his voice echoed down the hall.
Moments later, Y/N came out from her room. A short navy dress was hugging her skin, but what stole my attention was the jacket draped across her shoulders.
“I hope you don’t mind.” She said, pulling my black jacket around her.
“Looks better on you, anyways.” I said. It was the truth.
“Thanks, Dean.” She smiled at me before opening her small purse, reviewing whatever items lay inside of it. “See you later.”
With that, she was gone.
It may have been another hour before I got up, but when I finally did it was solely because I needed to go to the bathroom.
I stopped at the mirror. My reflection stared back at me, but this time it was different. Usually, I don’t look in the mirror.
Not when I wake up.
Not before I go to sleep.
If I do, I hate it. Plain as that. I never did like the man staring back, and I don’t know if I ever fully will. What changed though was that this time, someone liked what they saw on me.
My fingers reached up to my cheeks, running along the freckles on my skin.
Y/N liked them.
She honest to god, found something of mine that she liked. So, I did too. Immediately, I loved my freckles. I loved that my cheeks and nose were dusted with them, and that the most beautiful woman that I had ever laid eyes on, had found beauty in me, as well.
– – – –
It couldn’t have been earlier than two o’clock in the morning, when I heard familiar footsteps stumble down the bunker’s staircase. I kicked the sheets off of myself and went to see the state they were both in.
“Come on.” Sam mumbled, trying to hold Y/N up, but he was hardly walking himself. “Dean!” Sam shouted, his drunk self wearing a huge smile.
“Oh, it’s Dean!” Y/N exclaimed, a laugh bubbling out from her lips. She gripped the edge of the staircase with both hands, leaning forward as she spoke.
I crossed my arms and raised my brows, watching the two of them stumble through the bunker like baby deer.
“Here-” Sam tossed me a pair of car keys, “We called a cab, the car is still in the bar parking lot.” The keys hit the floor with a loud jingle, his aim completely skewed from the liquor.
Y/N rounded the edge of the table and began to fall towards me.
“Woah, there.” I grabbed her by her arms and steadied her.
“Thanks.” She laughed once more, at nothing in particular.
Behind me, Sam had already found his way to his room. Eventually, I’d have to check on him. For now, I gripped Y/N’s shoulder and guided her to her own bedroom.
“Oh- I forgot!” She looked up at me with wide eyes. “Remind me in the morning.”
I looked at her, waiting for her to explain. When she didn’t, I asked her what she was talking about.
“I have-” she stuck her hand in the pocket of my jacket that she was wearing and pulled out a napkin. A number was scribbled onto it. “His name is Matt. I have a date with him tomorrow night. Remind me, ok?”
I took the napkin from her, fighting the urge to rip it to shreds.
“Okay.” I stated, turning on the lights as she walked over to her bed.
“Promise me.” She kicked off her shoes sloppily. “He’s so nice-” I could tell she was beginning to ramble. Once she’s had enough to drink, she tends to.
“I bet he is.” I cut her off, helping her unzip her dress.
“He just has the most gorgeous freckles!”
In that moment, I worried that she could actually hear my heart drop into my stomach. I swallowed thickly, and within seconds, she continued on her drunken ramble.
“Goodnight.” I stated, simply from habit.
“Night, Dean!” She dropped onto her bed.
I should have gone back to bed. I should have crawled under the covers and shut my eyes. My feet had other plans, though. Step after step, I was trudged through the halls and into the library where my hand found a bottle of brown and an old glass.
Sam’s words spun through my head. She had to be protected. I thought back to everyone I had ever gotten close to; Charlie, Jo, and Bela were long dead. Just like every other fucking hunter that I had ever met and let into my life.
Sam tried to show me the positives. He brings up names like Jody and Cas – but who knows what will happen to them too?
I took another shot.
Eventually, it got dark.
– – – –
“Hey, sleepy.” Y/N’s hand gripped my shoulder. “Wake up.”
I opened my eyes and everything was sideways. Fuck.
“You fell asleep here, again.” Her soft voice explained my current situation. It was embarrassing. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, looking at the scene before me. A mostly empty bottle, a half drunk glass, and what I think was a little bit of drool, lay on the table.
“What time is it?” I asked, quickly getting up from the chair and brushing past her. She smelled like her shampoo. Always vanilla.
She turned her wrist towards me. Nearly noon, her watch read.
“Thanks.” I muttered and began walking towards the kitchen.
“I should be thanking you.” Her voice called from behind me. Then, her footsteps began to draw nearer. “I couldn’t have been easy to take care of last night. Sam and I, we kind of let loose.”
I grabbed the coffee pot and turned it on. The sound of boiling water dripping down filled the silence.
“No, it was fine.” I replied, then remembered what she asked of me last night. “Except-” I reached into my back pocket and pulled out a crumpled napkin. “Matt.”
Her eyes went wide, “Oh god.” She took the napkin from my hands. Her hair fell before her face as she read the number, and she combed it back with one hand.
“I totally forgot. Shit.” She pulled out her cell phone and checked for any notifications. “I’ll just text him.”
I turned from her, unable to watch her any longer, and grabbed a cup for my coffee.
“Want some?” I asked over my shoulder.
“No, thanks.” She said, just as her phone beeped. “He already answered!” She exclaimed.
I kept my eyes glued to the cup in front of me, not daring to see her face light up as she saw his name and not mine.
“Smells good.” My brother’s voice carried into the kitchen. He opened the cabinet and grabbed a cup as well, waiting until I finished pouring my own before taking the pot.
“Feeling good, Sammy?” I threatened a laugh and he rolled his eyes.
“I haven’t been this hungover in ages.” He grabbed a bottle of Advil and returned to the table. “It was worth it though, you should have joined.”
I shrugged and took a sip of my coffee.
“Who are you texting?” Sam directed his question at Y/N, who still stood in the middle of the kitchen.
She looked at him and dangled the napkin in the air, “Remember that guy at the bar last night?”
“The really funny one?” He asked.
She nodded fervently, “Yeah, Matt. I got his number and we’re going to grab dinner tonight.”
Sam glanced at me, before returning his gaze to his breakfast.
“He’s a good guy.” Sam said. I think it was more to me, than Y/N.
“I bet.” I mumbled into my drink.
– – – –
Sam decided to watch a movie tonight.
“Batman?” I questioned. He wasn’t one for the superheroes.
He popped it into the disk slot and dropped onto the couch. Looking at his huge frame swallow up the furniture, I remembered being able to hold him in my arms.
“Last time Y/N picked, it’s your turn.” He said while pressing play.
“Good. Wouldn’t want one of your history documentaries to bore me to death, tonight.” I began to laugh and he rolled his eyes.
“Whatever.” He muttered and grabbed the bowl of popcorn he had prepared.
An hour into the movie, the bunker door swung open. The loud creak it made reminded me to oil it later.
“Y/N?” I called out her name. The heels she was wearing when she left were no longer on. Her bare feet padded against the hardwood floor until she finally reached us.
“How was it?” Sam asked, lowering the volume.
Her lips formed a fine line, “I’m just going to go shower.” She grabbed a fistful of popcorn before disappearing.
I looked at my brother. His brows were raised as he shook his head in confusion.
“I’ll go-” I sat up from the chair, “I’ll go check on her.”
Her door was shut. I raised my fist to knock, but she opened it before I got the chance.
“You walk loudly.” She stated. My lips formed at ‘O’.
“What was that about?” I motioned towards the other room with my thumb.
She shrugged and put her heels away in the closet.
“Sorry about that.” She looked up at me with her big, bold eyes, “I think Matt was a lot nicer when he was drunk.”
I crossed my arms and sat on the edge of her bed. “Huh?”
“Well, we ordered our food and everything was great. I mean finally, a break from hunting.” She explained, and I sighed.
She pulled her bouncy hair out from the pins it was in while she continued, “He was sweet at first, really. But I could tell something changed. Matt wanted more than what I did…”
My arms fell to my sides, “Did you leave?”
“Yeah, but that was only after he asked me four times to go back to his place.” She was on the floor, her legs bent underneath her. She dropped her hands onto the floor from frustration as she spoke.
“What a douchebag.” I stated, no other word was able to form itself. “You don’t deserve that.”
She looked up at me, and a smile formed itself against her cheeks.
“I’m gonna be single forever.” She joked. “I mean, who am I kidding?”
“What are you talking about?” I asked.
From her spot on the floor, she reached out and gripped my leg with her hand. “Come on, Dean. We’re hunters. Let’s say it did work out with Matt – who’s to say he wouldn’t freak out the second that I brought him down into the bunker or told him that vampires are real!” Her grip tightened as she spoke, “It’s so fucking frustrating sometimes.”
“Dating is the worst.” I agreed with her.
“No.” She ran her hand down my leg and to my ankle, where she removed it.
I furrowed my brows and looked at her, every bit of me confused.
“Being alone.” Her eyes dropped from mine and my chest suddenly felt heavy. I knew the feeling of being alone, too well. It was heartbreaking, yet familiar at the same time. It was relief, yet yearning.
“You got me.” I blurted out.
She got up from her spot on the floor by my legs, and situated herself on the bed so she sat next to me.
“I know that, Dean. I meant… more.” Y/N’s voice dwindled into a whisper. I turned my head to face her, and in that moment, I couldn’t lie to her.
“Exactly.” I stated, and her eyes first searched my face. They traveled from eye to eye as she thought of what I could possibly mean, until her lips parted.
I didn’t know what to expect. My heart hasn’t raced this fast since for someone else since high school. I either just started the relationship I had been waiting for, or ruined a friendship that was worth more to me than anything else.
I was so focused on her face that I hadn’t realized her hand found mine.
I wanted to keep her hand there, to squeeze it tight. But, Sam’s words found their way back into my head.
“I’m selfish.” I stated simply, standing up from the bed.
“I’m being selfish, you deserve better.”
She tilted her head at me, her hair falling with it. “What are you talking about, Dean?”
“Everyone I touch, they-”
“I know what you’re going to say.” Y/N cut me off. “Don’t you dare say it.”
“You know I’m not going to.” She stood up from the bed and walked up to me, placing her open palms on my chest. “I’m not just somebody.”
“That’s the point!” I exclaimed, voice rising. “You aren’t just somebody! What if something happened to you? I can’t let you get hurt.”
“You’re not my keeper, Dean.”
I laced my fingers around her wrists, holding her palms tightly against my chest. “From the first time you walked through those bunker doors, I wanted no one but you, and you know why I haven’t told you?”
She looked up at me through her lashes.
“I have been torturing myself every day, because I want you safe. I need you safe.”
For a few moments, no one said anything. Y/N just stared up at me with a look I had never seen before.
Then, she stood on her toes, and pressed her lips to mine.
And God, it was everything I thought it would be. She was warm and sweet, like honey. Her hands were squeezing at my waist and I knew right there that I was done for.
My hands traveled up to her neck, grazing every inch of her skin.
“Since the first day?” She teased, speaking slowly against my lips.
I laughed, “Since day one.” I affirmed and she smiled so wide that all I wanted to do was kiss every inch of her bubbly cheeks.
“How about we get dinner tonight, sweetheart.” I asked, hoping she was still hungry after the shit dinner she described with Matt.
“I’d love to.” Y/N’s fingers found mine and she led me out of her room.
Sam was still seated on the couch. His hand was glued to the remote and I could hear the channel being changed every other second. When we passed through, my hand still in hers, he raised his brows and stared at me.
“Woah, wait-” He called out behind us.
“We’ll be back soon!” Y/N called over her shoulder.
A smile remained on my face for the rest of the night, never faltering.