go kart go

highlights of the 18hr livestream’s Mario Kart sessions (feat. Competitive Lauren™) pt. 1

• Joey: “oh shit my chip”

• Ashley: “oh my god Mario kart has changed so much since 2002 you guys”

• Gabe: “we’ve given Lauren bumpers” Lauren: “alright, relax”

• Lauren not paying attention when they started and immediately yelling “fuUCK KOOOPAA”

• the evolution of her saying “bitch” throughout: “hell yeah, hell yeah biiiitch” “come oooonn BIIIIIITCHHH”

• “oh fuck fuck fuck. i always go outta control BUT I LIKE THIS PLANT!”

• Lauren: “shiiit who is that? what asshole just did that?!?! oh can i swear on this livestream?” Gabe: “well you have been this whole time so if we can’t we’re real screwed”

• *gabe gets hit by a shell* Lauren: “HELL YEAH that was me BYEEE BIIIITCHH” Gabe: “do you think youre talking to me? cause I’m in first and you’re in fifth” (it wasn’t even her shell)

• “get ready bitch get ready biiiiiiiitchh”

• “ohmIGOdohMigOdoHmiGOd”

• *evil cackling every time lauren does remotely well*

• Brian: “who are you the king of Red Robin?” Lauren: “what do you get, bottomless fries??”

• Brendan: “what does the one mean?” Everyone: “you got one point” Brendan: “you hear that? I’m number one!” Brian: “dude, NOT that”

• Lauren shouting at the tv over Gabe and Ashley sharing childhood anecdotes

• Gabe: “eat my banana baby!!”

• Lauren: “fuck this. goddammit. this little ghost the little ink ghost” Joey: “it’s a squid. it is, that’s why it’s ink” Lauren: “have you seen how it moves? excuse me”

• “oh fuck me!! BIIIITCHH…”

• everyone sitting casually on the couch but Lauren leaning in really intensely:

• “this is all I have: my fifth place status”

• Ashley: “oh no Brendan is falling behind. Brendan people are invested in how BAD you are at this game”

• Ashley *reading the chat*: “‘there needs to be a swear jar’ no we’re ADULTS we can say whatever the fuck we want”

pt. 1 // pt. 2 // pt. 3

It's Self Care Saturday!! 😊

Hello Lovelies! Today is Self Care Saturday! Here’s some nice things you can do for yourself!

General Health:

💧Drink water!
🍓 Make a smoothie with fruits and veggies!
💊Take your medicine
😁 Brush your teeth
😴Get 8 hours of sleep

High Energy:

☀️ Go for a walk in the park!
☀️ Exercise
☀️ Dance

Medium Energy:

⭐️ Clean your room
⭐️ Cook a yummy meal or some baked goods
⭐️Plan a game night with friends

Low Energy:

🌙 Take a well deserved nap
🌙 Watch your favorite movie
🌙 Journal about your feelings

Fun Things:

🌈 Check out your local farmers market
🌈 Go on a picnic
🌈 Visit the zoo/ aquarium
🌈 Go go-karting
🌈 Visit an amusement park

Relaxing Things:

🌱 Drink tea
🌱Use a face mask
🌱 Give yourself a manicure
🌱Take a hot bath
🌱 Meditate

Maintenance Things:

📍Note when medicine needs to be refilled
📍 Note when car maintenance is needed
📍 Double check bills
📍Organize backpack for school
📍Make grocery list and meal plans

Rewarding Things:

🏅 Go shopping
🏅Go to the spa
🏅Order dessert
🏅Buy your favorite sweets
🏅Go to the movies

Happy Self Care Saturday!

highlights of the 18hr livestream’s Mario Kart sessions (feat. Competitive Lauren™ and Mom Friend Ashley™) pt. 2


• “GOD *incoherent screaming* who keeps doing that?!?!”

• Gabe: “I do it for #Garlos I do it for the fans”

• Joey: “remember when Mario did a crossover with kung fu panda?” Gabe: “nope. did that happen?” Joey: “no.”

• Lauren *falls off track and saved by the cloud guy*: “ah godammit. always gotta get this guy to fucking save me”

• Ashley: “only like 1 in 3 people spell your name right” Brendan: “it’s ok it wasn’t right on my high school diploma either” Lauren: “so you never actually graduated high school” Brendan: “it’s tru”

• “i am honestly so sick of everyone”

• Brendan: “you know, whoever keeps firing things at me you don’t have to. i am perfectly capable of running off the course all by myself”

• Ashley *reading the chat*: “‘Lauren sure does swear a lot’ but the rest of us perfect angels”

• Lauren *starts losing*: +

• Brendan: “guys i got six points that time! oh, i’m still in last place…” Gabe: “it’s a selected number of points. you’ve gotten one point” Brendan: *death stare* Gabe: “i love you”

• Lauren *getting her controller back as the race starts*: “jojo. thank you so muc- JOEEEY!”

• Lauren: “wait, FZERO?? i used to have this game on nintendo” Joey: “well, guess what? this is a nintendo console my DAWG”

• “oh my god this is totally taking me back. i’m doin it for child hood me”

• Lauren *starts losing AGAIN on the fzero track*: “corey it’s broken!! corey stop the game!!!” Corey: *crickets*

• Gabe: “what the dic- who is- noOO!!”

• Brendan *drives off the edge*: “bye everybodyyy…”

• Joey: “lauren’s in first cause she loves this game so much” Gabe: “what??? how is she doing that?!?!” Lauren: “fzero’s my jam biiiitchh”

• Ashley: “Brendan you’re doing amazing sweetie”

• *clayton knocks on the door* “honestly no one can talk when they enter the room ok i’m focusing. ahh it’s bROkeN!!”

• Lauren *almost falls off*: *incoherent hiss/wheeze/growling?????*

• Lauren: “UGHHHH THIS FUCKING GHOSTTT” Brian: “it’s a squid” Lauren: “it’s a GHOST” Brian: “it’s clearly a squid”

• Brendan: “I’ve hit everything I’m not supposed to hit…”

• “oooh bitch. i got a fucki- i got a plant i got a plant biiIITCHH!!! oh shit. i got a plant i got a plaaaanttt”

• Gabe: “what keeps happening?!” Lauren: “Gabe, are you having a fall from grace?”

• “get outta my way. geT OUTTA MY WAAAY!!!”


pt. 1 // pt. 2 // pt. 3