my partner at the time and him are friends now but they fucking hate eachother lol like i spoke to this dude a few weeks ago (we made up for like three days) and we were shittalking my ex and he was obsessed with the idea of seperating my ex with my other ex like chill dude lmao
Who abused him????
I missed something
his uncle, aunt, and cousin. the way the books were written (especially the first three) sort of glosses over most of the abuse, in part because they’re marketed toward children, but also because we’re seeing things from harry’s perspective. an abusive home environment is all he’s ever known, so it becomes normalized in his mind and, to a certain extent, acceptable.
the dursleys verbally, emotionally, and physically abuse harry. they force him to sleep in the cupboard under the stairs (which is infested w/ spiders btw) and frequently lock him inside as punishment for incidences of accidental magic (which he isn’t aware he is doing), perceived wrongdoings, or just because they feel like it. when harry is moved upstairs to a real bedroom, they put bars on his window and a cat-flap and several locks on the door.
they often withhold food from him as another method of ‘punishment.’ they show him no affection or love whatsoever, which is crucial for a child’s development. they ignore him. they belittle him, and call him names. they speak to him and about him as though he’s not intelligent enough to understand them or decent enough to deserve better. they lie to him about his parents and his cultural heritage.
a lot of fans seem to disagree on this, but the books also make it very clear that harry was physically abused. in cos, aunt petunia swings a frying pan at harry’s head (this was not half-hearted or for show, harry had to dodge the blow to avoid being hit). harry is genuinely terrified of vernon after the pudding explodes in the kitchen, and is physically dragged up the stairs and thrown into his room. in ootp, harry is actually strangled on-page by uncle vernon when he’s caught listening to the news. he makes a comment in the same book that a ‘good sense of when to duck’ is useful for getting along with his uncle. in hbp, harry considers the fact that ‘long experience’ had taught him to stay out of arm’s reach of his uncle. neither harry nor the dursleys ever act like any of this is out of the ordinary. petunia and vernon also encourage or at the very least ignore harry being hit and attacked by dudley (and occasionally beaten by dudley’s whole gang of friends).
it’s stated in the first book that the reason harry’s glasses are broken and taped is because his cousin has punched him in the face so many times.
just because harry is never caned or whipped to within an inch of his life doesn’t negate the fact that he was canonically physically abused, possibly quite badly.
one of the most insidious ways the dursleys abuse harry is the dichotomy they intentionally set up and perpetuate w/ regards to harry and dudley. they force harry to sleep in a cupboard - at the same time they give their oldest, biological child not one but two full-size bedrooms. they starve harry, and feed dudley all the sweets he wants. they refer to harry as ‘boy’ and ‘you’ and avoid using his name (iirc they use his given name once in all seven books. once.) and frequently call dudley by over-the-top affectionate pet names. they make harry do endless lists of chores while dudley watches tv and plays video games. they ignore harry’s birthdays or give him ‘presents’ like coat hangers, but they buy dozens of gifts for dudley on his birthday and take him on fun trips while harry is left behind at a neighbor’s house. they want to send harry a message: you are worthless. you are nothing. you are not a part of this family. and throughout his childhood, they systematically condition him to believe it. (which profoundly affects his mindset and decisions later on in his adolescence but that’s a different extraordinarily long post)
harry was horrifically abused, but he was horrifically abused in a series of books written for children and young adults so it makes it a little less obvious. but imagine the same things happening to your friend or classmate or nephew or neighbor’s kid and it becomes clear that it’s completely horrifying.
my heart has been set free from the cage it was previously locked in and my god, let me tell you, walking away from what destroyed you, feels so good. see, it took so long. so much valiant effort. so much pain. the cage was stained red with my blood. i tried to shrink myself down, fit through the lock, squeeze my way out. i tried everything possible and it never worked. i would rattle the bars until my hands were numb, id scream and beg for help and gave up when my voice left me along with my happiness. until one day i sang the song my heart had been dying to sing for so long. the truth. and it set me free. i expressed how i felt, i screamed about my heartbreak, i felt the pain, i cried it all out. and the cage is no longer restraining, but merely a fading image of what i once was confined in. i am free to fly now. and i have flown so far away that happiness comes far easier to me now and it feel so good. letting go feels so damn good.