Based on this post, consider this my own Glee-style mash-up mega mix of ‘things are going terribly’ Christmas AUs.
There’s a little sprinkle of smut glitter, not much, but as close as I write. Unbeta’d
Fuck. Emma threw her phone across the room and tried not to cry. She shouldn’t be this upset about a delayed parcel. But this particular delayed parcel meant that Killian Jones was not going to get a gift from her on Christmas Day.
It was stupid, really, but he was the best best friend anyone could hope for. He was endlessly supportive and patient with her bullshit. Always ready to come to her rescue whether that meant pretending to be her boyfriend to deter the most enthusiastic of sleazes or defending her to friends, family and random strangers. And his dry wit often had her snorting with laughter. Yep, he was a keeper. As a friend.
And she knew that his childhood and even young adulthood had been on a par with hers in the crappy stakes. He deserved a good fucking Christmas and his own best friend wasn’t going to give him a gift.
She’d bought one of course. It was a perfect miniature of the Jewel of the Realm, the finest ship in the seven seas, and his own personal obsession. It was nestled inside the distinctive bottle of his favourite brand of rum, and said bottle was engraved with the inscription “Property of Captain Jones”. It was a crazy expensive gift she’d had specially commissioned months ago just to suit her adorably nerdy, pirate-obsessed friend. It was currently stuck halfway across the country and no amount of begging, angry threats or hefty bribes was going to change that. She’d tried.
She thought desperately if there was anything that she could re-gift to him. But the only thing she’d had so far was peppermint lube from Ruby. And from what he’d told her he loved oral au naturelle so she couldn’t imagine he’d appreciate it.
Fists clenching, she took a deep breath, she could totally brave shopping on Christmas Eve for Killian, he was worth it.
This is the Glee version of Some Nights over the top of the Fun. version of Some Nights.
I’ve edited it so that the timing is kind of right. It kind of loses it at the end. But I kind of enjoy that part that is the hot mess. We all have our issues.
I found a post where someone put the two tracks just on top of each other, and I kind of fell in love with what the intro was, but because the Glee version is faster it loses that epic feel early on so I played around with the speed, and did it in parts so the tempo is kind of uneven, but just think of it as a super relaxed live version.
Feedback for my editing works is always appreciated. More constructive then telling me it sucks, I already know that part.
“If I were going to be scared of anything it would be something that, y'know, actually exists.”
“Glee mash-up songs?”
“Those aren’t scary, they’re a tragedy.”
“Come on, you’ve gotta be afraid of something.”
“Nope, no fears here,” Beca said, almost proud.
“She was brave enough to stand up to Drill Sergeant Posen from day one,” Stacie reminded them.
“Yeah and Jesse tried to scare me like a billion times this time last year. We watched all of those horror “classics” and he kept trying to jump scare me. You know, back when we were dating and I felt obligated to sit through those marathons.“
“I bet I could scare you.”
“No Chlo, I promise, you can’t.”
“No I legit bet I could scare you, $50!”
“Seriously? $50?” Now things were starting to get interesting
“What, you scared? Because if you were this would be the easiest bet ever.”
“No, I would just feel bad for straight up taking money from you.”
“Take the bet girl!” Cynthia-Rose said, always all about the gambling.
“You don’t know what you’re getting into Red. I’ve had 21 years to get this stoic, fearless thing down.”
“Everyone has a weakness Becs, I just have to find and exploit it,” Chloe stated adamantly, fire in her eyes,“ In fact, I bet I could do it within a week!”
“Oh you are so on.” The girls shook hands and everyone in the kitchen whooped and hollered, CR already taking side bets on who would win.
“You know what- $30 for Chloe, if anyone can crack Beca it’d be her,” Stacie said.
“No way! I’ll match her for Beca,” Amy countered,“ The other day she walked in on me and Bumper doing this new thing while we were trying on our policewoman and prisoner costumes where I’m behind him and I take my baton and-”
“LA LA LA!” Emily said plugging her ears before she could hear the rest.“
“Anyway- we were doing it and Beca walked in and barely bat an eye lash, just got her headphones and walked back out.” The freshman could only imagine how the rest of that story would go.
“What about you Legacy? You gonna make a bet?” CR said.
Emily shook her head. She was warned by her mother that everyone went a little crazy in college around Halloween but she didn’t think it would be this weird.
Or maybe it was just the Bellas.
Beca sung quietly to herself as she applied the conditioner to her hair. Even with the shower running she could hear the door to the bathroom quietly open and close. She had to hand it to Chloe though, if she weren’t paying extra attention- or expecting it because come on, trying to scare her in the shower was so four years ago- she probably wouldn’t have noticed the shower curtain subtly move.
“BOO!” Chloe said behind her. Beca turned around slowly, smirk placed firmly on her face.
“If you were really trying to catch me off guard you would have come in here fully naked.” Chloe had come prepared in a bathing suit. Even though the image of a nude Chloe was still fully ingrained in her mind Beca could still fully appreciate what was in front of her right now.
“Is someone getting cocky?” Chloe countered though she was feeling a little hot under the brunette’s unwavering stare. It was much different than it was the first time. Completely reversed in fact and she was dying, especially with Beca there wet, naked, smirking…
“No, I’m just more confident about…all of this, than I was a few years ago.” ‘You should be,’ was at the tip of the redheads tongue but instead she gave out a small squeak,“ You want to share a towel or do you have another fool-proof plan to scare me?” That got Chloe to snap out of it.
“Oh, I’ll get you, Mitchell, just you wait,” Chloe stepped out of the shower.“ Now get changed and get downstairs, we have to discuss the set for the Inaugural Barden Pumpkin Festival!”
“I’m still pissed at you for agreeing to do that by the way!” Beca yelled back.
Chloe quickly dried off and threw some clothes on. Although, she seriously debated taking a cold shower herself after that interaction.
“So?” Stacie asked when Chloe made her way to the kitchen, she would rather not lose to Fat Amy. She shook her head,“ Damn it, but it worked before!”
“Ah, and that’s your problem, she saw it coming!” Amy said.
“Okay, you know what I’m in, $10 on Beca,” Emily handed her money to CR, the holder of the pot.
“See, even Legacy knows I’m gonna win!” Beca said, coming down the stairs.
“Oh don’t be too sure yet missy, I still have five more days”
Chloe was far from giving up.
Sure she had tried clowns, lightning, jump scares, and getting Lily to dress up like the grudge and they all failed but she was so not giving up.
She wouldn’t let Beca win this one.
Five days later the girls exited the Haunted House at the festival. They had some down time before they had to perform and they were fully utilizing their free rides and food that they received as compensation.
Half of them still looked entirely freaked and the other half covered their terror with wide smiles.
“-oh my god that chainsaw guy was awful I almost shit my pants!” CR said.
“Jessica cried!” Ashley laughed.
“Did not, the green ooze from the fourth room got in my eyes!”
“It was okay,” Beca shrugged- truly unphased by the experience.
“UGH how could you be so totally un-scarable? That was terrifying!” Chloe pouted. She had tried relentlessly for 5 days straight to scare the pants off her co-captain with no success and had seemingly given up the last two.
“Hey I warned you- easiest $50 I’ll ever make.” Chloe fumed in reply,“ Oh c'mon Chlo don’t give me that.” Still, the redhead didn’t reply. Beca was only a little worried since they had always had this playful banter between them, but maybe she was being a little too much of an asshole this time,“ It’s just a stupid bet don’t be mad.”
“I’m not mad. And I still have ‘till midnight. Now c'mon, time to go backstage and get ready.” She put on a smile but Beca still wasn’t buying it, she hoped she hadn’t screwed anything up between the two of them. As much as she put up a front she knew her relationship with Chloe was one of the things she held most dear, she’d kick herself forever if she messed that up over something as stupid as a bet…even if Beca did come out on top.
“Alright girls, just a routine performance- practice for regionals!”
For the festival they had applied Zombie make-up and wore tattered versions of their regular outfits- not without the Bella’s scarf of course. It was definitely not the most challenging number they ever had both vocally and choreographically, but it was fun and a crowd pleaser starting with “I Put A Spell On You” by Jay Hawkins, getting mixed with “The Monster” by Eminem and ending with Imagine Dragons’ “Demons”.
At least, that was the plan but half way through Demons Chloe suddenly stopped, causing Flo to run into her. Then it was chaos from there as most of the girls kept singing and the others stopped to make sure Chloe was okay.
The redhead just continued to lean of and disregard what was happening around her.
By the time Beca had noticed something was going wrong behind her Chloe was gasping for air as she held onto Emily who looked like she might pass out. The brunette rushed to the other captain and took Emily’s place.
“I…can't…nodes,” Chloe tried her hardest to breathe in but she couldn’t. Doubled over, she did her best to lean on Beca for support.
“Oh my God her surgery must have had some sort of side effect,” Stacie guessed, looking just as freaked out as everyone else- audience included. The other Bellas did their best not to panic as they kept watching.
“C-can't… breathe.” The gasps were getting shallower as she struggled.
“ALRIGHT CALM DOWN EVERYONE SHE IS NOT GOING TO DIE!” Amy screamed.
“Amy, shut the hell up right now! Chloe hold on don’t talk, someone get her water and call an ambulance!” Beca demanded wildly.
“I’ve got it!” Stacie said, hastily taking out her phone.
“Chlo j-just sit down okay? Everything will be-” the senior collapsed on the stage onto her side, several gasps could be heard from the crowd and a scream came from some of the Bellas.
“Shit, shit shit shit, Chloe?” Beca tried, getting to her knees so she could put Chloe’s head into her lap. She ripped off the Bella’s scarf that was tied to her neck and saw that her skin was an angry red.
“WATER I FOUND WATER!” Amy yelled handing her a novelty Pumpkin shaped cup, but Beca was in hysterics as Chloe remained unconscious.
“No no no please Chloe please be okay. You’re okay, the ambulance will be here any minute and they’ll take care of you just, I need you to be okay-” Beca could feel the tears well up in her eyes. She knew they shouldn’t have taken this stupid gig. If they had just had a normal night they wouldn’t have to sing and Chloe wouldn’t have put stress on her node surgery and she would be fine and oh god. What if she wasn’t fine? Then it would be Beca’s fault and Chloe was still mad at her and she would never forgive herself if-
“AHRGHRGHH!” Chloe screamed as her eyes shot open and she sat straight up. Beca gave out an uncharacteristically high-pitched yelp, stumbling backwards from Chloe and landing straight on her ass, staring incredulously at the redhead- who was fine and smiling.
There was a small pause and then-
“What the actual fuck dude?!” she yelled, slamming her tiny fists on the ground because she had no idea how to react.
“GOTCHA!” Chloe continued to grin.
“Wh-I- DUDE. So not cool!” Beca shook her head, her heart still beating quickly from the scare- she could honestly say she had never felt like this before,“ I thought you were- I thought…
"I scared you didn’t I?” Chloe crawled over to the brunette and kneeled between her legs,“ Didn’t I?”
“I- you… You looked- and you hit the ground so hard and the make-up and-” Beca punched Chloe’s shoulder, not enough to hurt her but enough to convey her anger,“ That was so mean.”
“Yeah it looks convincing huh? You can thank Stace for that.”
“Yeah, I didn’t call an ambulance either,” Stacie winked. For the first time Beca remembered that there were other people there. The girls surrounding them also had large smiles on their faces. They were all in on it.
“WHAT?!” Amy bellowed. Well, except for Amy.
“That was….” Beca said, still speechless and in shock.
“Brilliant? Creative? Successful?”
“Evil. You know how much I…” instead of finishing her sentence she glared.
“Like I said, brilliant. I knew I would find a weakness to exploit. Looks like I’m your weakness.”
“Aww, don’t be bitter because you lost sweetie.” Beca just continued to pout. She didn’t know if she was more upset about the fact that she almost lost Chloe (kind of) or that she lost their bet.
“I’m not bitter…” she said unconvincingly. Chloe leaned forward to give the clearly fuming girl a long peck on the cheek and her features softened a considerable amount.
“Don’t worry, I’ll make it up to you,” Chloe whispered suggestively,“…but first, you owe me $20.”