glasses shark

Curses Correspondences

A short list of things that are suitable for a curse or a similar spell.


Herbs for a curse-

  • Aloe vera
  • Black coffee
  • Black pepper
  • Blueberry
  • Mustard seeds
  • Nettle
  • Pistachio
  • Poppy
  • Saffron

Incense for a curse-

  • Patchouli
  • Anything burned on charcoal

Crystals for a curse-

  • Garnet
  • Graphite
  • Lapis Lazuli
  • Ruby

Day of the week-

  • Tuesday or Saturday

Time of day-

  • Night or Evening

Moon phase-

  • Waning moon or New moon

Colours-

  • Black or Red

Other Things-

  • Tobacco
  • Cigarettes
  • Broken glass
  • Rusty nails
  • Thorns
  • Shark teeth
  • Razor blades
  • Vinegar
  • Charcoal
  • Dust
  • Dirt from a cemetery or a crossroads
youtube

So, I’ve been checking out clips from “My Brother, My Brother, and Me”, which is a long running comedy podcast (it’s still going too, holy shit) by the same guys that did TAZ, and this one just gets me every time I listen to it.

Justin is fucking hilarious.

youtube

(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bR0Ubck0IRA)

I have watched this eight billion times. 

The signs as memes

Aries: do you crave that mineral

Taurus: pepe

Gemini: I’m a snerson (snake person)

Cancer: I’m a snerson (snail person)

Leo: blowing the trumpet and slamming the oven door

Virgo: RICKROLLING

Libra: I’ve never heard of a George Glass at our sküle

Scorpio: left shark

Sagittarius: inappropriate audition songs

Capricorn: *looks at smudged writing on hand*

Aquarius: I came out here to have a good time and I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now

Pisces: putting things in that weird-ass advertisement frame

on the topic of lance and sharks

as someone who’s favorite animal is also a shark, here are some things that lance 100% did when he was younger

  • hoarded shark info books
    • he’ll write down one on his christmas list every year, and will always look forward to a new and different book
    • he has a hefty collection of these shark bio books by the time he’s in middle school and can spend hours just looking through all of them, even if he’s read them before
    • any time he has guests over he’ll show them one, all excited like “and this is a thresher shark! they’re one of the least aggressive species, and this long bit on their tail is used like a whip, since their jaws aren’t as strong as other sharks”
  • whenever his family would take trips to the aquarium he’d mope along the walls of fish and stingrays until they got to the real attraction, then would just sit down against the glass of the shark tank and stare
    • then, of course, he’ll go and sneak off into the gift shop when they’re leaving and beg his mom to buy him the shark plushie
    • he has an array of shark-related items (multiple plushies, figurines, even a snapper toy with a shark head) sitting next to his collection of books, all taken from aquarium or ocean park gift shops
  • since he grew up practically living on a beach, he’d constantly hear people whine and complain about the possibility of sharks in the water, and because he has no “this is a stranger maybe i shouldn’t intervene” mentality when it comes to stupid people, he’d go ahead and inform them of all the reasons they have nothing to worry about and are just being dumb
    • um, yeah, he still does this
  • playing pretend (hoooo boy what a nerd)
    • any time he’s in the water it’s always: Lance: “no mom i can’t get out of the water, i’ll die!” Lance: “i really need some new goggles, how am i supposed to be a tiger shark if i can’t even see where i’m swimming?” etc. etc.
  • his favorite shark will change nearly every week, but more often than not it’ll either be a thresher, a blacktip, or a hammerhead

some glasses!lance headcanons as a gift for @redtodd

  • lance has tried all the styles - he started off with the basic rectangles as a kid, progressed on to hipster frames and more 
  • all the colours
  • prescription aviators because fashion
  • he started wearing contacts at the garrison for convenience and self-confidence issues
  • in space his contacts obv get used up and so for a while he’s like ‘i can’t see for shit’ and coran is like ‘what the quiznak is wrong with you’
  • so basically they work stuff out and lance gets new glasses with super cool bright blue frames
  • you know that lance is one of those people who walks into stores and takes selfies wearing all the novelty glasses
  • he bought and owns shark novelty glasses and he loves them 

When I was a kid, uhhhh, I would sometimes get into the deep end of a pool, and I would have the thought: heh. What if there were a shark in here? And then… over the next few minutes of being in the deep end, it gradually congealed into “FUCK ME, there is a shark in here!” Don’t matter if I can see through the water, don’t matter, he was behind me, HE’S MADE OF GLASS! Glass Shark, Glass Shark… Glass Shark love fat kid. That’s one thing you gotta know ‘bout Glass Shark. Glass Shahk, he luff da fat kid. You stay out de watah fat kid, Glass Shark cumin’ FO’ YOU. He gitchu down in dat bad deep wadah, dat DAAAAAHK WADAH. Fat kid NO GO. GLASS SHAHK COME TO DAT DAHK WADAH AN’ HE GITCHU FAT KID! YOU SWIM AROUND HE BITE'CHO TRUNKS CLEAN OFF, YOU TUBBY LITTLE FISH! You swim all you want… Glass Shark GON’ COME. GLASS SHAHK BEHIND YOU FAT KID YOU GOTTA SWEEEEEEEM, SWEEM FASTER AND PRETEND THERE’S A CORN DOG AT THE OTHER END OF THE POOL AN’ GIT OUTTA DAT DARK WATAH. Dat dark watah dat GLASS SHAHK COMIN’ FO’ YOU FAT KID! He don’t care, he GLAAAAAASSS SHAHK