give me the cookies then damn

Dean Wants you to: Treat Yourself

Alright sweetheart, listen up and listen good. I don’t care what you’ve failed to do, I don’t care what you’ve successfully done. As long as you’re trying your god damn best, you deserve a treat. You wrote five words that completed a sentence? Good job, eat a cookie.

You tried to make it through your whole workout? Even if you didn’t make it, give yourself a nice slap on the back. Good team effort, go play that video game. 

I know, it’s instinct to be hard on yourself when you don’t achieve every goal you’ve been workin’ on. Believe me, I now far too well about being rough on myself. But come on man, we’re humans, we fail – it happens. The world keeps movin’, and so should you. I’m working on it, we’re all working on it. Learn to give yourself a break, ok?

So the next time you just barely scrape by, remember how hard you tried. And eat that slice of pie, damn it.  

If only there were a food blog where the author could shut the fuck up and give me the god damn recipe and relevant instructions so I’m not forced to sift through mountains of bullshit about finding inner peace just to make fucking cookies.

in middle school i would wear van halen and mcr and sailor moon shirts to school and got made fun of because

1) i talked “like a white girl/didn’t speak ‘black’”
2) the only rap I knew were Kanye’s first three albums
3) i wore glasses, heavy eyeliner, heavier acne

and one reason i’m still on this shit hole site is because it lowwwkey gave me the confidence to embrace who i am and not give a damn when the cookie cutter chicago suburb i grew up in never gave me the chance. i see so many black girls who are like me, loving alternative, rock, and punk music, wearing black, slaying their makeup, and i just never had that or saw that growing up. it makes me feel not alone in the best possible way. i love myself now at almost 20 years old and partly bc i made this account in the 8th grade
also…speak the way you want. i tried so hard to fit in to the wrong crowd and purposely downplayed my speech because of it. don’t do that shit. we are intelligent human beings, flex that mind and be proud of it. there is no color to speech. don’t try to fit into the mold society puts us in.

Okay but someone give me Matt saving a kid from a fire and finding out that kid is an orphan.

Give me Matt struggling with himself because he knows, damnit he knows better than anyone that growing up in the foster system is not a life. It’s a damn punishment.

But he can’t take the kid in. It would mean putting another innocent person in danger with what he does.

Give me Matt convincing Foggy to take the kid.

Give me Foggy Nelson baking cookies and reading bedtime stories and doing arts and crafts.

Give me “uncle Matt” bringing presents and letting the kid stay up and watch scary movies when he babysits. And falling asleep on the couch together when they’re both too tired to move.

Give me Matt and Karen and Foggy all waving as they drop the kid off for their first day of school and they are all three crying so they go to Josie’s and have a drink.

Give me Daredevil Matt catching the kid as a teenager sneaking out of the house and telling him/her/them to get back in the apartment or so help him.

Give me the kid knowing all along that Matt is the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen and not caring that his/her/their “uncle” is a vigilante. In fact, give me the kid purposefully hanging a poster of Daredevil on his/her/their wall and pointing it out to Matt when he comes over.

Give me Matt and Foggy and Karen all crying again when the kid graduates high school.

Give me Matt and Foggy sobbing when the kid tells them that he/she/they want to go to college to become a lawyer.

Give me Christmas dinners and family game night and trips to the waterpark and late nights and early mornings and long walks through the park and long talks through the years and give me happiness.

Give me Uncle Matt Murdock - The Man Without Fear.

blue-cat-hat  asked:

(2/2) Blue ends up wall jumping down before grabbing onto a tree and swinging to land right next to Gabby safe and sound. "Yoo, I just found out that I can wall jump like in video games, isn't that cool? Uhh Gabby? You ok?" AfterBlue learns about Gabby's powers, it takes five minutes of apologies and explainations before Gabby finally just told her to chill and Blue gave her cookies as an apology

Gabby: You know what sucks about being a healer?

Blue: Wha -

Gabby: THAT NOBODY’S HERE TO HEAL MY BUSTED ASS WHEN Y’ALL GIVE ME A GOD DAMN HEART ATTACK -

Blue: I’ll go get some more cookies…

The Signs On a Rainy Day

The signs are all stuck inside on a rainy day and seek for each other for entertainment

Leo: *has attitude* Can we go somewhere, this rain is giving me a headache.

Aquarius: Bitch calm your tits. It’s not like it rains every day. 

Virgo: It’s too damn cold, I was supposed to go see a friend, This rain is messing up everything I strive for. 

*Libra ventures out of his room*  Why is everyone bitching so much.

*Capricorn and Sagittarius walks in from the rain carrying multiples season of supernatural.*

Sagittarius*excited*: Whos ready guys?? *notices tension in the room.

Capricorn: Whats going on, now?

Aquarius: Everyone is just on their Rag

Leo: I am not.

Taurus: *walks out with a tray of cookies* I baked cookies!

Pisces: I decorated them! *Frosting all over his face*

Scorpio: *plops on couch with like 5 cookies in his lap.* They are good, trust. Cookies and Supernatural, this is life.

Leo: Nobody wants your cookies Taurus

Cancer: Hey, come on now. 

Taurus: FINE THEN! *storms off and Pieces follows her*

Sagittarius: Why do you gotta be so mean Leo?

*Gemini and Aries comes into the room discussing theories* 

Gemini: Did you know that every time it rains the mermaids are helping the earth because they want the earth healthy.

Aquarius: Are you high?

Aries: Hes not i am. *turns to Scorpio* Hey where did you get that cookie.

Gemini: Seriously the Mermaid are really unhappy with us, were killing the planet dudes!

Virgo: Capricorn can you take me to see my friend? This rain is killing my mood.

Capricorn: NO we just got back.

Leo: No take me out!!

Sagittarius: If you weren’t such a bitch maybe we would.

Aries: OHHHHHHH! SHOTS FIRED.

Leo: Shut the fuck up Aries. I thought you were my friend Sagittarius.

Cancer: *quietly whispers to himself* This is madness. 

*Taurus comes out with a fresh tray of brownies and drops the hot tray on Leos lap* Bitch since you didn’t like my cookies, these are just for you.

*Pieces comes behind her and does a Z shaped snap in Leos face and walks away with Taurus*

*Scorpio Goes to the brownies that fell on the floor.* NOO WHAT HAVE YOU DONE.

Aries: *Picks one off the floor* These are still good. 

Libra: This escalated quickly. 

*Leo is crying in anger, and goes to fuck Taurus up.*

*Capricorn goes and gets in front of Leo* 

Sagittarius: Do you want an ice pack for that, Sit down. Don’t be mad, Remeber Taurus is mentally 5. 

Libra: That’s what you get for being a bitch. 

Aquarius: Don’t start more shit Libra.

Scorpio: I just want supernatural. 

*cancer gets fed up with the bullshit, gets up and goes to the kitchen and comes back with Taurus and Pieces* Now Everyone apologize to each other, i don’t care who started it.Can’t we ever just have a good day without bickering?

*Taurus hides behind Sagittarius and Capricorn and whispers* I’m sorry Leo.

Leo: Sure Sure…

Pieces: Im not involved.

Libra: Yo dude just end this.

*Scorpio puts on supernatural* IM NOT WAITING NO MORE

Capricorn: I give up, *goes and sits in front of the TV*

*Leo never apologizes, and the feud lasts untill the rain stops and Leo can go outside, and Virgo never goes to see his friend and everyone thinks hes lying, Aries is high the next few days, Aquarius and Libra thinks about moving out and maybe cancer too, Taurus and Pieces also made a cake, and Sag, Capricorn and Scorpio watched Supernatural until the witching hours. Gemini goes on a mermaid hunt.* 

OKAY STORY TIME MY SISTER’S 9 AND SHE HID MY DAMN PHONE AND HEADPHONES AND FOR 20 MINS IM TRYING TO FIND THEM AND ASK HER TO GIVE IT TO ME AND SHE WOULDN’T SO I HID HER DAMN BOW FOR HER VIOLIN SO THEN FOR ANOTHER 10 MINS WE’RE BOTH SCREAMING AND THEN SHES LIKE GIVE ME MY BOW ILL GIVE U THE PHONE SO WE DO IT AND SHE GIVES ME MY PHONE BUT NOT THE FUCKNE HEADPHONES AND SHES LIKE THE DEAL WAS ONLY THE PHONE U DIDN’T SAY HEADPHONE SO FOR ANOTHER 15 MINS IM TRYING TO GET THE DAMN HEADPHONES AND SHES LIKE OKAY ANOTHER DEAL GIVE ME 5 MILLION DOLLARS IM LIKE HOW ABOUT 1 DOLLAR U BITCH AND SHES LIKE DEAL SO SHE FINALLY GIVES ME IT OH MY GOD SHE WASTED LIKE AN HOUR OF MY TIME AND TOOK MY DOLLAR WHICH I COULD’VE USED TO BUY 3 UNDERCOOKED COOKIES DURING LUNCH I CANT

PSA

Sooooooo our precious princess @books-and-cookies birthday is coming up in late August! 

I’m stoked to be getting her something a little extra special, and if you’d like to join me in getting her a present, please feel free to message me and I’ll get you all the details! 

We’ve been best friends for about two years now, but damn does it feel like so much longer. Mary is one of my favourite people on the planet and she deserves the world, but for now, this is all I can give her. Hit me up before August to get in on the fun :)

Also we’ll probably collectively make her cry tears of joy, so there’s that to look forward to!

THis is bullshit tumblr always screams about helping for people and they help everyone in the fucking world but the minute I need help “oh no not you” and I get fucking anons for how dare I want help this is such bullshit this entire website is full of shit you’re all full of shit why should I listen to anything any one of you has to say about how much you give a shit about people like me why should I listen to people who pretend to have my problem you’ll promote anything but people who actually need help
you’ll pay 17,000 for a god damn piss ball pit because its fun but screw anyone who actually needs help like fuck here I am being abused with a mental illness but no, lets donate to the guy who wants to bake 5 cookies and doesn’t want to run out of ingredients, lets scream about social justice and the rights of people that society hates but lets not actually DO SHIT to help them 
fuck every single one of you AND FUCK EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU WHO UNFOLLOWED AND FUCK EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU WHO WILL ASK M ETO TAG THIS AND FUCK EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU WHO WHO WILL UNFOLLOW AFTER THIS ALL I ASKED IS THAT YOU REBLOGGED ONE SIMPLE FUCKING POST AT LEAST 20 TIMES I ASKED AND I GOT SHIT
SO SUCK MY DICK YOU CAN ALL LICK EACHOTHER’S ASSHOLES FOR ALL I FUCKING CARE LETS ALL HOPE I DONT END UP KILLING MYSELF THANKS A LOT