Sorry in advance to VSC, this is just such a beautiful song, I had to post it! (Thank you Slacker Radio for releasing this in advance.) Behold, the song from the famous Chicago Med promo, and from the Facebook Year In Review video!!! It has only been edited slightly edited to give a very almost unnoticeable fade in at the very beginning. Other than that, untouched. You’re welcome guys!
“I don’t know what I think,” he admitted, his voice thick and muffled, lost somewhere between grief and distress. He dug his fingers into his hair. His heart was clenching; his eyes starting to burn again even as he squeezed them shut. “I don’t know anything anymore. All I know is I miss him so much I feel like I can’t breathe. And it hurts every time I remember he’s never going to walk in the room again.”
Okay, so every VA reader knows those infamous four words: “Love fades. Mine has.” We all hate the way Dimirti went about putting Rose at a distance because of his guilt. However, those four words didn’t bother me as much as something else…
It’s actually what he says right before that famous line that kills me the most. “I’ve given up on you.”
Imagine for a moment that you are Rose. You didn’t know your father for 18 years. The mother you did know was both physically and emotionally distant, showing her acknowledgment with criticism more than anything. She lives in a world where her thoughts, opinions, and general existence is put behind someone else because of her race. Her adoptive family was killed in a brutal accident. One of her oldest and best friends was murdered in front of her and I can imagine she still feels some survivors guilt about it. Her other friends are distancing themselves from her in one way or another. Even her bondmate is more concerned with someone else at the moment and isn’t available to support her. The only person who you could argue is on her side is Adrian, but their relationship is understandably on the rock with everything else going on.
Rose has lived a lifetime of both intentional and unintentional abandonment. But there is one person she had in her life that made her feel like she was worth more: Dimitri.
He saved her from expulsion and offered to mentor her the first day he met her. He saw potential where others saw nothing more than uncontrolled defiance. He molded her skills and made her the best possible guardian he could, to the point where she was top of her class in that respect come graduation, despite missing two full years of schooling.
Beyond her professional skills, he also was there for her personally. I’m not even talking about romance here. I’m talking about the fact that he continually treated her with respect (yes, he said some stupid things in Frostbite but promptly apologized for them), encouraged her to push herself, and picked her back up when she fell. He didn’t baby her or belittle her, he was firm but not domineering. He put her wellbeing before his own. He put her first.
Even when he was denying the ability to have a relationship with her, he stood by her.
Even as a monster, he took care of her and protected her.
He NEVER gave up on Rose.
Until that moment.
The one person who had fought along side her to make Rose the best possible version of herself essentially told her that she wasn’t worth fighting for anymore. She wasn’t enough.
She risked EVERYTHING for him…and he told her that it wasn’t enough.
I’m not saying that he automatically owed her anything for doing everything she could to save his soul. That was Rose’s choice. Heck, with the pain he was going through, he might even resent her a little. However, imagine how damaging it would be to be willing abandoned by your mentor, lover, friend, and the one person who made you feel like you, as an individual, was worth more.
He didn’t even want to SEE her. She had to jump through hoops to TALK to him. Forget romance, he didn’t want to be in her life at all, in any remote capacity.
The truth is, Dimitri is right. Love fades. People argue, drift apart or pull away, feel hurt or slighted by the other, and go through some personal issues that make a romantic connection secondary in priority. Love isn’t static. It’s constantly in motion. Sometimes it’s growing. Sometimes it’s fading. However…they can work through it.