girls-and-panzer

anonymous asked:

Hey, can you stop being tsundere for like two minutes to take the time to appreciate all the GuP commanders? ktgxbai.

MIHO NISHIZUMI - Master at the art of Gorilla warfare with over 300 confirmed matches. She will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth with Boko. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

MAHO NISHIZUMI - NEE-CHAN OF THE BEST CHAN MOTHERFUCKER. No one can break through your heart and the enemy’s defenses faster than this girl. She strikes fast and hard to get what she wants and you can’t do shit.

KATYUSHA -  Расцветали яблони и груши, Поплыли туманы над рекой. Выходила на берег Катюша, На высокий берег на крутой. She’s big. She’s not bad. In fact she’s fucking adorable but would probably let you freeze in the winter. 

DARJEELING - You can hear fucking Eurobeat playing from outside her tanks because no matter what, the tea inside will never spill. Darjeeling is a fierce girl that won’t take shit from anyone. Even Miho calls her “Mommy” since Miho has never defeated Darjeeling before. CUZ DARJEELING NEVER LOSES.

KAY “The BAE” - God bless the motherfucking U.S.A. cuz Kay is an absolute joy to this Earth. Rich in weapons, food, and noise, she will always make sure to overwhelm you in everything you fucking do because AMERICA IS THE LAND OF THE GREAT NOT THE LAND OF SHITTY FUCKS THAT DISCRIMINATE AGAINST OTHER PEOPLE. KAY ACCEPTS ALL. SHE LOVES ALL.

ANCHOVY - DUCE!  DUCE! DUCE! DUCE! DUCE! DUCE! DUCE! DUCE! PASTA!  PASTA! PASTA! PASTA! PASTA! PASTA! PASTA! PASTA! PASTA! GOD I WISH SHE WOULD WHIP ME

ALICE SHIMADA - So smart she skipped grades and so cute that she made people’s heart skip as well. Alice is the soft, gentle, FUCKING BEAST THAT WILL DESTROY YOU AND EVERYONE YOU LOVE. Like a person doesn’t look down when stepping on ants, Alice will not look down when she kicks your sorry ass excuse of a tank out of the match. Fuck off you aren’t worth her time.

MIKA - She will Finnish the battle as quick as she can play the Kantele. That hat of hers only conceals her actual power level. 

KINUYO NISHI - She will fucking eat you alive. That’s it.