girls low self esteem

In case you missed issues B.A.P WAKE ME UP MV has touched on pt 2 cuz im trash and have been wheezing/crying the whole day fight me

Insecurities + Low Self Esteem/self-worth: shown through the girl with makeup around her and she soon tries to apply lipstick, only ending up smashing the mirror.
Murder/Shootings: The man waving his arms around as if conducting a musical piece until lights spark at his fingertips (like gunshots being fired) and then people dead surround him.
Anxiety/Depression/Mental Illness: The man in the bathroom, coiled up by the bathtub as he looks at his surroundings afraid of something, only to submerge himself into the water in his bathtub.
Illness in General/Suicidal thoughts or attempts: The girl who drinks down those pills as well as some other type of liquid can represent either illness in a physical aspect or portrays the attempt to suicide.
Eating Disorders/Hallucinations: The scene with the woman chopping veggies can allude to two different interpretations. Hallucinations as she almost eats a worm or it is the symbolic representation to express eating disorder.
Societal/Political Issues: The probably most iconic scene where the man is holding up a sign “Emotion Revolution”. This is representative of public demonstrations we see on the news today to fight for equal rights and social justice. The people passing by as if its nothing represent those who are unaware of the issues that surround them.
Revolution is starting to be achieved when these people who went through their own respective life problems come together to help ‘spread the awareness’. I guess you can say they, “wake up” into new ‘selves’, represented through celebration towards the end of the MV.

This isn’t even it. The MV is very diverse in nationality and they haven’t placed labels/stereotypical roles on these people according to the colour of their skin or where they came from. Each and every person was given a role that any human being would go through in their life because every human being is a human being despite race, colour, place of birth, gender, etc.

Not only did B.A.P create a song concerning social justice but they went even deeper this time. They went into mental illness, problems that we have as individuals at a personal level rather than just ‘society’ as a group. They looked into people in their variety and represented it through WAKE ME UP MV.

B.A.P aren’t just ‘kpop idols’. You probably thought I’d say “they don’t fit in the kpop category anymore.” No. This is something far bigger than just the music industry.

I was not tagged to post it, but I was feeling like to. So here it goes my first self of 2018, or was it the last of 2017?

Romance Cliches to Avoid: Whether it’s in your plot or subplot

Hello, it is I, the frenchiest fry.

So here’s a small list of cliches to avoid when writing up that romance bit of your novel, whether it’s on the front plan or on the sidelines eating cheetos.

  • Evil other woman: attacks heroine for getting too close to the hero. Also, always there to contrast the “good” heroine because readers can’t tell who’s good or bad unless you deliberately put a character that embodies it. A+.
  • Evil mother: usually the rich one that opposes the relationship (for my K-Drama fans, think every damn chaebol drama out there I’m looking at you Boys Over Flowers)
  • City woman ends up in the country, meets very hunky tanned muscled country boy who can’t stand city girls because they’re too pristine (contrast Hannah Montana the movie and Under The Tuscan Sun (the good example is the latter))
  • Virginal naive heroine gets paired with the male slut and relationship expert. Male also leaves behind is womanizer ways to be with this naive virginal woman. Because she changed him. Somehow. ?????
  • Matched up via will of a dead relative (a personal favourite. don’t do it.)
  • Misunderstandings that can be resolved in 1 minute. I didn’t sleep with her, pinky swear.
  • Bad boy no redeeming qualities + good girl, no personality = ???????????????????????? a pile of horse shit that’s what bad boys are called bad for a reason. would you eat bad eggs? no. they’re bad for you, they’re rotten. goodbye.
  • Heroine can’t form a sentence in front of hot guy and blurts out the randomest thing like “OATMEAL” and runs away. It aint cute honey just don’t talk to him. Awkward conversation is acceptable.
  • Nothing consensual (ulless of course you’re going for that, but don’t GLORIFY IT FOR FUCKS SAKE) which means no surprise kiss, or sleeping kiss.
  • glasses make a woman automatically ugly and she needs an entire chapter dedicated to a makeover. but when men wear glasses all women become hoes
  • mysteriously your hero is always at the right place at the right time to swoop in and save the heroine. that doesn’t happen in real life. how many times was i stuck in the rain without an umbrella? WHERE WAS MY KDRAMA LEAD WHEN I NEEDED HIM MOST- ahem
  • perfect guy falls for boring girl (low self esteem, struggling)
    Disclaimer: i’m not saying that because you have a low self esteem and are struggling in life that you’re boring. but it seems that authors put it that way, and they also can’t write for their life that someone is struggling. There’s a difference between a complex validly struggling character and the boring struggling character.
  • Love at firs sight: y’all. Unless it’s unexpected and the greatest example is this: remember in Princess Diaries, Mia had this thing for that backstreet looking boy with the blond hair and tanned skin that hung with the cliche blonde bitch (collective sigh) and he was perfect in her eyes and she was always day dreaming but once she got her makeover, he was a huge dick? Like major ew?
  • Heroine’s issues are magically solved by the hero. Depression? What depression? I can watch him take his shirt off to chop wood every morning and hot damn do I need a bath. Poverty? What poverty? Father in jail? What? DID YOU SEE THOSE PECKS????
  • “I DON’T NEED A MAN TO SAVE ME- Oh hey let’s get together after I clearly tossed you to the side like a sack of potatoes”
  • The man always runs his fingers through his hair. At every occasion. Happy? Fingers to hair. Sad? Fingers through hair. Angry? How is his hair still silky and bouncy and not at all greasy.
  • Ah so having a thin waist, big boobs, and being a virgin is the recipe for low self esteem? Even after the author clearly describes you in ways that would never make you as plain as you put yourself to be? What’s your secret, need me some of that.
  • Only the hero sees how beautiful she is, what about the others around her?

Originally posted by maths-and-books

This honestly made me angry, but y’all feel free to add your own cliches!!

I step out into the road without looking as I need that car to hit me;

I’ve lost all the drive of my own.

—  I’ve lost. // A.S

Just wondering do any of you ever deal with what I explain as “identity crises” I have lots of different special interests and interests in different styles and I get so self conscious and down feeling like I don’t know who I am or who I want to be…I have a love hate relationship with makeup and designer brands, sometimes I like them and sometimes I have no interest in them so mostly I stick to none/barely any makeup and comfy oversized clothes. I don’t know if I’m making any sense but do any of you know how I feel?? It’s like I’m on a constant journey to find ‘the real me’

Two and a Half Minutes

Warning - I don’t care if you ship Sasusaku, Narusaku, Narusasu, or Naruhina this post is gonna hurt. It’s long - but that’s because it is addressing something that has been going on a long time.

So, the fandom, myself included, have been giving Sakura Haruno a lot of sh** for her “two and a half minute” date with Sasuke.

But I’ve been rereading the series - and a realization slowly dawned on me. A realization that Sakura Haruno - one of my most hated characters - might in fact be one of the most tragic characters in all of fiction.

Now, if you’re out of the loop, the “two and a half minute” date meme comes from Boruto: Naruto Next Generations Episode 17. Ino takes Sakura to where she had her first date with Sasuke. 

Sakura remarks, with a wistful smile, that the date only lasted two and a half minutes.

Now, many people view the above as Studio Pierrot being “biased” against Sasusaku. That since the above episode is anime original, that it’s just Studio Pierrot crapping all over Sakura and Sasuke because they dislike the characters. I fundamentally disagree with this view. There’s many reasons i disagree with this view - the notion of an entire studio disliking a character is absurd and childish, Sumire was an anime original character but she is appearing in the manga as well - Boruto had a movie before the manga proper started - but the main reason I disagree with this view is because I think the shortness of the date - along with other visual elements - hints towards a plot that has been going on since the very beginning of Naruto as a series

So before we ask “what significance does two and a half minutes have?”, let’s examine where Sakura sits when she “reminisces” about her date.

From behind, Sakura sits on the left side of the bench. Now, remember - she’s reminiscing about her first date with Sasuke here. Try and figure out what’s wrong with the above picture - specifically, the problem with Sakura sitting on the left side of the bench. Give up? Well, remember, this is supposed to be Sakura and Sasuke’s first date. Sakure and Sasuke do not begin dating until chapter 700. With the above in mind - that the first date is sometime after chapter 699 - and with Sakura sitting where she sits - there’s something she and Sasuke cannot do.

Hold hands.

If Sakura sat on the right side of the bench - then Sasuke would have to sit on the left. To hold hands, Sakura would have to hold out her right hand - and Sasuke his left. But Sasuke can’t do that.

He lost his left hand in his fight with Naruto in chapter 699. 

So what’s going on? Is the evil Studio Pierrot painting Sasuke and Sakura as so clumsy as to not sit properly to hold hands?

No, I don’t think so. But before you write off Sakura’s placement on the left side of the bench as a coincidence, remember, Studio Pierrot has been very persistent about Sasuke’s missing left hand. In the second ED, Sayonara Moon Town, Sarada reaches for Sasuke’s left hand - which of course isn’t there.

The imagery here is obvious - Sarada doesn’t know her father well enough to know he is missing his left hand. But there’s more left hand imagery in the ED than that.

Specifically, towards the end. Sarada sees a blurry picture of her mother and her father holding her hands - with Sasuke using his left right hand. But when Sarada puts her glasses on - the image is revealed for the fake it is. Just as Sasuke never held Sarada with his left hand, Sarada’s family was never truly united.

There’s a lot to say about Sarada - she is in my opinion the most interesting character in Boruto by a mile. But this post is about Sakura - and about understanding Sakura’s dilemma - Sakura’s tragedy. I will not mince words to appease the concerns of shippers - what Sakura Haruno faces transcends OTPs and petty shipping. 

So I’ve been saying that I do not think Studio Pierrot is biased against Sasusaku. I stand by that statement 100%. However, I do think Studio Pierrot portrays Sasusaku for what it is - a broken marriage.

Primarily, it is Sasuke’s absence that causes the Uchiha family stress - but ultimately, it is Sasuke’s lack of communication that hints towards broader problems. Sasuke leaves Konoha, Sakura, and Sarada to investigate the Moon People. 80% of his missions take place in locations where cell phones do not work. In a healthy marriage - you’d expect Sasuke to still vist and contact Sakura and Sarada once in a while - but in the show…

For those who think Studio Pierrot is the devil, note that in the manga Gaiden story written by Kishimoto, Sarada never met her father once either - and in terms of letters, keepsakes, and momentos, all Sarada and Sakura have are a pair of glasses, and a picture.

Now, I am not trying to demonize Sasuke - or any character. But what I am doing, and what Studio Pierrot is doing - is humanizing them. Boruto as a series focuses on what happens after the “happy ending” - after the hero achieves his dreams and saves the day. 

The easiest thing in the world a sequel can do is rehash the first story. It’s a rather simple fanfic level of writing a bad sequel strives for - all the characters from the first series marry, have kids, and are completely content for the rest of their lives, as their carbon copy kids retrace their steps. 

Boruto is not a bad sequel. Boruto is an extremely good sequel - because Boruto takes risks - and realistically appraises what happens after the end.

For example - what happens to the dango obsessed badass fighting ninja after the war is won and peace prevails?

She gets an office job and becomes fat.

What happens when Naruto becomes Hokage like he always dreamed?

He gets swamped with paperwork, and his family life is strained.

So it’s no surprise that when Sakura marries the guy who tried to kill her on multiple occasions, that their married life would be unstable, and unhappy. That Sakura would go into denial, and insist that Sasuke loved her - going into violent mood swings when even the slightest bit of doubt was cast onto that premise. This is Boruto, folks. It is a sequel that takes risks and builds upon the foundation that Naruto laid. It isn’t needlessly dark - but it isn’t unrealistically sappy either.

As I mentioned previously - I hated Sakura for the longest time, because I just could not figure out why she was in love in with Sasuke.

Not only did Sasuke try to kill her -

But he explicitly viewed her as worthless

And has held a low opinion of her since the start.

Even Sasuke seems confused by Sakura’s love for her - and calls it a “fantasy.”

And for the longest time - I agreed with him. I did think Sakura’s love for Sasuke was a fantasy - that her feelings were fake, shallow, worthless.

But that’s not the case at all. Sakura is, in fact, the most genuine character in the series. Her feelings were not wrong. What was wrong with Sakura, were the circumstances that led her to her broken marriage. -And the fantasy she IS trapped in. 

So let’s return to Sakura, Ino, and the bench.

Remember what Sakura said - her first date with Sasuke was near a bench, and that the first date only lasted two minutes and thirty seconds.

Can we think of anything from the original series involving Sakura, Sasuke, a bench, and a time limit? Well, rather than a time limit, a reason for the date between Sasuke and Sakura to end prematurely.

I can. The bench isn’t quite the same, but Sakura is sitting on the right side of it. Now, when I say go back to the original series, I mean go back allllllll the way to chapter 3 of Naruto.

You might realize what’s up immediately, but play along. View these events through Sakura’s perspective.

Sakura is bummed. She’s angsting over her appearance - she doesn’t think Sasuke will like her. But her depression fades away as the boy she has a crush on appears - and looks at her with warm eyes.

Sakura fantasizes about Sasuke telling her a cheesy one-liner - and then immediately dismisses it. She’s not a kid. She’s not living in fantasy. But then, miracles of miracles - her fantasy becomes true.

At a time when she was down on herself - Sasuke came over to her - flirted with her - and made her daydreams into reality.

They say a cynic is just a romantic who secretly wants to be proven wrong. And here, Sakura’s cynicism was smashed apart - by a boy with warm eyes.

But just as she leans in to kiss her prince -

He leaves.

Sakura’s encounter with Sasuke must not have lasted long. All said - probably no more than two and a half minutes. But two and a half minutes is a long time for a girl with low self esteem - and for a boy with warm eyes to cheer her up-

But unlike Sakura - we know the truth of her “first date” with Sasuke. We know that the Sasuke with warm eyes was in fact Naruto.

Naruto, immature, and with a crush on Sakura. He disguised himself as Sasuke, and Sakura fell in love with Sasuke. What once was a childish crush became something more - how could it not?

But I don’t think Naruto is aware of the repercussions of his actions. By coming to Sakura when he did - Naruto made Sakura fall in love with a Sasuke that didn’t exist.

A Sasuke with Sasuke’s appearance, but Naruto’s warmth. And for all the bad Sasuke did, Sakura didn’t forget that warmth. She became a romantic - determined to save Sasuke - to save the boy that saved her.

But Sakura was never told that the Sasuke she fell in love with was Sasuke dressed up as Naruto. That isn’t to say she oblivious. Read the following - and consider the implications of Sakura switching from talking about Naruto in the third person, to addressing Naruto in the second person.

See? She starts talking about Naruto in the third person - but then turns to “Sasuke”, and says “All I want is for you to acknowledge me.”

Sakura is no dummy - and one thing established from the start is that Naruto is good at transformation jutsu. She seems to have her suspicion the Sasuke she sees is Naruto - but she doesn’t seem to really mind who the boy with warm eyes is. Such warmness and emotional honestly causes Naruto to understand his crush on her.

But Sakura is left without closure. And when she sees Sasuke’s heroism on Team 9 - it begins to make more and more sense to her that she is in fact in love with Sasuke.

Even when Sasuke turns evil - and attempts to kill her, Sakura is determined to save him. Or as Kakashi puts it…

But Sakura’s doubt - or perhaps her search for the boy she fell in love with - it does come up again. This time in Shippuden. When she confesses her love to Naruto.

Her confession is clumsy, and awkward. She has to explain why she doesn’t love Sasuke anymore - and it all sounds terribly unconvincing.

But then she says this.

“I realized… who you really are.”

It is snowing when Sakura confesses. Snow equates to love in Japan - and Hinata and Naruto are given plenty time in the snow to showcase their love.

But to all of what Sakura says, Naruto says in return -

“I hate people who lie to themselves!”

It makes sense, from Naruto’s perspective. Sakura has been so desperate to get Sasuke back - and there’s no way someone like her could love someone like him.

But while Naruto remembers all the times Sakura pleaded to save Sasuke, he forgets the time he and her almost kissed by the bench.

He forgets because much like Sakura, he has low self esteem. He can’t imagine someone would love him. Not just a tsundere like Sakura - his future beloved wife needed to confess to him and almost die multiple times before Naruto could get it through his head that he was loved. And speaking of tsunderes - guess what Naruto acts like when he realizes he loves Hinata?

A tsundere. Just like Sakura. There was a time when Sakura loved Naruto, and when Naruto loved Sakura - but due to their low self-esteem, and circumstances beyond their control - along with misunderstandings up the yin-yang, they never got to be a couple. it’s ironic, it’s tragic, and its awful - but I have a strong feeling it’s the truth.

But while Naruto ended up with a wife that loved him, and he loved back - Sakura ended up in an uneasy marriage - one built upon misunderstandings and compromise.

Sasuke felt guilt for his actions - and Sasuke needed to rebuild his clan. As for why he would marry Sakura, well, grim necessity might be a way to describe it.

And why Sakura would marry Sasuke - well - surely, he was the boy she was chasing. Naruto told her not to lie to herself, after all.

And when it comes to her love of Sasuke, Sakura definitely isn’t lying.



I aspire to playing strong women because that’s how women are in real life, even though that’s not always portrayed in film or on TV. Self-confidence and self-belief are very important issues for young women and I’m very proud that I’ve had the chance to play a woman who has transformed herself from a girl with low self-esteem into a much more powerful and confident young woman.


I am… I am green

I love Mondai No Aru Restaurant with all my heart and I want to make at least one more gifset highlighting how good it is, but I wanted to show Nitta’s speech first because it really got to me. When I was a kid and I played Sailor Moon with my friends, I actually WANTED to be Sailor Jupiter. She was strong and badass and yet traditionally feminine and I loved characters that were allowed to be both strong and girly, like Rogue from Saban’s X-Men. However, I had the same problem Nitta had. When roles were distributed, I could rarely be Jupiter because, even if I didn’t look like any of the Scouts, Makoto was the furthest to me. A short, fat, girly, bookworm kid like me wasn’t imposing, strong looking enough to be Jupiter. I had to be Mercury, she looked nothing like me but at least she was shy and nerdy. Sailor Moon is often put up there like a feminist anthem, like a broth in which current young feminists were brewed, and although I do recognize its merits, I also understand its shortcomings and I loved how this drama showed the other side of its impact on young girls.

I found it fascinating how Nitta is given green in the show’s restaurant, and she has a rocky yet developing relationship with a co-worker, who she considers an “enemy” for being everything she’s not (she values appearance and romance more than study and work). But it turns out that this girl was also always Jupiter in the playground and, when she gets a color in the restaurant, she’s orange, like Sailor Venus, the one with the shortest skirt and the love, beauty and light powers and who was an idol, often dismissed by girls I grew up around for the opposite, because she was “too feminine”. They both find out, through the episodes, that the only thing keeping them apart is internalized misogyny. 

This drama, much like Sailor Moon, has a female protagonist who wants to fight for justice, a less magical and more realistic kind of justice, putting up a restaurant after a friend of hers gets severely harassed in the workplace and trying to fight back to the sexist environment they work in. Much like Usagi, she has an entourage of girls with different personalities, identities and issues (a young hikikomori with severe social anxiety, an overachiever with low self esteem, a girl who seeks validation through male attention and is victim of abuse, a trans woman whose work is put into question constantly for her identity and not her talent, a career woman who left her job because it’s too difficult to try succeeding when she isn’t a man and a mother who’s constantly denigrated and finally abandoned by her husband, who is trying to take her son away from her). They’re not only fighting for a common goal of helping their leader, they’re all fighting for their own self respect, the defense of their own identities and a sense of equality that is constantly being taken away from them, in the most denigrating and sexist ways possible. So yeah, I love this drama and I sure hope I can make more gifsets to represent its amazingness, but this speech dealing with internalized misogyny and female competition through a Sailor Moon metaphor really deserved its own gifset. 

The Signs as types of Girls
  • The Fashionista: Aries, Gemini, Libra
  • The playgirl/ seems perfect: Leo, Scorpio, Virgo
  • The nerd girl: Sagittarius, Scorpio, Cancer
  • The Adventurous girl: Scorpio, Sagittarius, Leo, Aquarius
  • The Ambitious girl: Scorpio, Capricorn, Aquarius
  • The low self-esteem girl: Sagittarius, Pisces, Cancer
  • The keeper: Scorpio, Pisces, Capricorn, Virgo
  • The picky one: Cancer, Taurus, Libra