why is it that in movies girls only talk about boys when in real life my girl friends and I talk about fashion, human rights, politics, make up, art, literature, sports, buying cars, renting apartments, family problems, social networking, career aspirations, periods, child birth, university life, how our day went, religion, science, food, academics, sex changes…

literally any & everything besides boys.

Tips for eliminating period pain

Drink water! The less hydrated you are, the worse the pain will be.

Eat bananas! Cramping can be caused by a potassium deficiency and bananas have lots of potassium!

Avoid salt! Extra sodium can make your cramps worse.

Apply heat!! There are many ways to do this: hot water bottle, pour dry corn, beans, or rice into a sock and microwave it for 15 seconds, icy hot/bengay (use caution), or just a heating pad. This will relax the muscles in your abdomen and ease cramping.

Masturbate! Orgasms relax the muscles and ease cramping.

Exercise! Keeping your body moving is a great way to both get your mind off the pain and ease the pain.

If all else fails, grab a rusty knife and cut out your uterus. Fuck that bitch. All she wants to do is hurt you.

Alright, ladies, gentlemen, and everything in between, listen up. I have a vital piece of information that is apparently not well known. If you have bad menstrual cramps, drink chamomile tea. The cramp pain will usually be gone not long after. Chamomile is a natural muscle relaxant, and cramps are caused from intense muscle contractions within the uterus to expel the useless lining. The chamomile calms the contractions and therefore the pain as well. So. If you’re on your period, drink the chamomile. Save yourself from a sea of blood and pain lovely people!

I should just open a period store

It’ll sell pads, tampons, diva cups, assorted pain killers, sweat pants, comfortable underwear, XXXL t-shirts, fuzzy socks, heating pads, hot water bottles.. There will be a snack session, assorted sweet and salty treats, assorted flowers, stuffed animals, people can drop off coupons (Free ice cream cone anyone?) as donations.. There will be a lounge in the back of the store where you can chill and watch chick flicks and snack and bitch about your bitchiness, it’ll be great