giraffe eating

Somebun’s jealous.

Me:  Oh, I’ll have the giraffe snuggle on Simon.  It’ll be cute!

River:  Not on my watch!

River:  Get off my Simon! [chomps giraffe butt]

Me:  Uh-oh.  Don’t eat the giraffe!!!! [yoinks giraffe out of River’s mouth]

The sound that came from River at this point could best be described as an angry “Meep!”

I set the poor giraffe on its feet only to have River rear up and punch it in the face, knocking it over.

Seriously, check out the look on her face.  Who knew snuggles could cause this kind of drama?

Simon decided to nope out of there after seeing River become an amateur pugilist.

Simon:  I’m flattered, but the giraffe and I are just friends.  You really need to work on your anger management issues.

River:  …

Simon:  [flops next to the giraffe] We’re all good, right? 

River:  [slowly pushes Simon away from the giraffe and makes sure he can’t see it]  Yeah, we’re good.

The peculiar children as things I've done

Horace- got on the wrong bus and didn’t want to inconvenience anyone so I got off at a random stop and walked home (which took like two hours) uphill with no sidewalks in a skirt and ballet flats

 Emma- lit a lighter and got so transfixed by the fire I almost burned down the house when I dropped it on the carpet because ~it was hot~ 

 Hugh- Found a bee’s nest in the tree I was sitting in while reading, continued to sit there but read my book aloud for the bees 

 Fiona- Was too lazy to stand up and throw out the pumpkin seeds from the jack o'lantern I was carving so I threw them out of the window and grew a full pumpkin patch in my side garden 

 Olive- Rollerbladed in my house, fell down the stairs, and had to go to the hospital because I almost broke my wrist 

 Claire- Woke up at two in the morning to buy ice-cream at a Girl Scout overnight, got lost, and wandered around the Museum of Natural History in NYC in a giraffe onesie eating an ice cream sandwich and crying 

 Millard- Cut my leg really deep and almost passed out from blood loss (did not tell my mom), didn’t drink water for a week and a half and almost passed out in choir (did not tell my teacher), hit my elbow on the door frame and sobbed for like a full 20 minutes

Bronwyn- Thought a girl was cute at the gym, but was too shy to say hi so I tried to impress her by running really fast on the treadmill, forgot I had the incline of the highest setting, fell face first and lost my shoe, unplugging my earbuds in the process so the RENT soundtrack blasted out of my phone

Enoch- Loudly chanted ‘I AM A DARK RUTHLESS BADASS DON’T MESS WITH ME’ as I sprinted away from my dark basement with my arms full of craft supplies (there was nothing in there I was just scared of the dark) 

 Jacob- Fell asleep at a diner with my entire theater class, woke up, freaked out, and launched my milkshake all over my friend while screaming 'FUcK’

Bonus: Victor- Was babysitting a 6 year old and got way to invested in an episode of My Little Pony, yelled at the screen, and the six year old patted my leg while turning off the tv and said 'That’s enough of the ponies.’

theblankpagebxforeyou  asked:

One Word Prompt: Kale, Character: Gibbs

Gibbs was pushing the green leaves around his plate, unwilling to actually eat them. He didn’t know what he was thinking, agreeing to eat this giraffe food.

“You haven’t even tried it, Jethro.” You spoke up. “You promised you would.”

His lips tightened into a line, stabbing one of the leaves with his fork a little too hard. Gibbs did promise he’d try it. And he wasn’t one to break a promise; especially if it would make you happy.

After a moment, his eyes rose up to yours. And Gibbs noticed the way you watched him carefully. Waiting for his reaction. When the Marine finally put one of them in his mouth, he had to force himself not to wrinkle his nose at the taste.

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