giovanni do

Humans Are Weird

It is well established among all sentient species that Humans are Weird. Exceptional Humans, however, make the regular humans seem almost tame in comparison.
Yatrov was to show the newest crew member- another Human- “the ropes”, as Human Jenny phrased it.
Upon arriving, however, the newest Human barely spared xir even a glance, which was odd, seeing how Humans prize interaction above all else. Shrugging it off, xe delicately held out a clawed hand to engage in the Human positive-meeting greeting, a “hand-shake” it was aptly named. “I am known as Yatrov, in Human Common tongue. I am sorry to say that I was unable to read your file report, and am thus left without your name. What is it you wish to be called?” Yatrov was genuinely sorry; the ship was in dire need of repairs, and this Human was coming to help.
Instead of taking the proffered hand, the human’s brown eyes stared into xi’s own violet. “I am Giovanni. And you are approximately 7 minutes late. I do not fault you for your tardiness, your job is a busy one, so your apologies are void. I do not need to see the entirety of this ship, I only require the engine room. Take me there and I will begin repairs immediately. Social niceties and other such meaningless things can be done at a later date, if done they must be at all.”
Yatrov felt somewhat slighted; xe’s species did not greet with touch, but it was seen as an insult- a social misdemeanor- to deny the shaking of hands. Attributing it to the Human having been under circumstances that made him “cranky” and to the fact that the Human was excited to work- humans forgot norms when excited, xe had found- Yatrov continued to try to create a pack-bond with this Human, “I have heard many great things about you.”
“Truly?” The Human considered this for a moment, head tilting, “I am merely faster than most, mentally. A marathoner or racer is not spoken of in as high-esteem as those with quick mental facilities are, are they?” The Human was speaking out loud, xe found this practice odd and ignored it. “What exactly have you heard?” The Human tapped their legs with their fingers, adopting a rhythm unknown to xir, and hummed. 
Arrogance or curiosity? “Admittedly, not much has been told. I know that you have several thesis papers, have repaired and improved upon numerous ships, and that you were good enough that our captain was surprised that you even bothered to consider joining our crew.”
“Huh.” And that was that. Giovanni did not speak after that, made no effort to communicate. Giovanni did not try to obtain physical contact. Giovanni remained aloof with even Human crewmates long after he had joined. He also remained fidgety, seemingly unable to keep still, unless it was to engage in a staring contest with the resident cat- to keep the Humans from adopting a weird, deadly creature- or to continue his single-minded work with machinery.
Three weeks after he had joined, the ship was attacked. Vernians boarded the ship, using their many appendages to apprehend multiple members of The Highlight- the ship- at once. No one knew where Giovanni was, and no one would have been surprised if he had left to save his own hide.
Which was precisely why everyone, who were all bound and trying to negotiate with what was essentially pirates, was surprised when Giovanni came around the corner, a knocked out Vernian held under gun point.
Guns pointed at him, Vernians shifted to attack him. “What you need to know: firstly, I have hacked into your language processors. All Vernae will sound like gibberish.” He paused, then grinned ferally. “Try”, he dared.
“Kir-ah?!” They did, and did not seem pleased with the results.
“Back! Restore!” the voices of Vernians screeched, their language translators on the fritz. 
“Secondly,” he paused, “I will shoot your friend if you do not release my own.” When an uproar of shouting started again, he blandly stated, “Blank point will be quite messy, won’t it?” He hummed, as though in thought, though his eyes trailed after every movement the Vernians made.
A smaller one, likely emotionally closer to the Vernian Giovanni was holding captive,  pounced.
ZZZZZT-PA! The Vernian howled, two of its 11 “arms” gone. “My threat is not idle.”
The room quieted, members of the Highlighter slowly being released.
“Thirdly.” His lips pursed, his nose tilted, sneer deadly, “Run, and pray that I never see you again!” He shot a wall, and they scattered, leaving the crew of The Highlighter mostly unscathed.
It was hours later, after the chaos was settled and the ship fixed up again, that Yatrov approached Giovanni.
“Why did you save us?”
Giovanni scrunched his thick eyebrows together, “Why ever would I not?”
“You make no attempt to communicate with us.” Yatrov insisted, trying to discover the reason Giovanni would do something without some sort of gain.
“Oh, that.” He dismissively waved his hand, his face again lax and bored. “I do not see the point in wasting words. I enjoy the presence of the crew, and- while I see no point in engaging in it- their idle chatter is amusing to listen to.” He raised an eyebrow, “Why do you ask?”
“The crew operated under the belief that you disliked us.” Yatrov felt a small bit of shame; clearly, Yatrov had been wrong to assume that all Humans were so similar.
“I-” He looked hurt, eyes filling with water- tears, they were called, and Yatrov knew that this was not a good sign. His lips twitched, his words near whispered, “Did you not consider me a friend? I thought we were.” He had begun nervously threading his fingers, humming lightly.
“I thought you disliked me.” Yatrov’s admission only increased xir’s guilt, and the slight tremors of the Humans smaller body.
“I made you and the others a new computer.” Giovanni’s eyes searched Yatrov’s one, and again found no solace. A computer did not equate to friendship. “I *made* you and the others a new computer.” The emphasis hit Yatrov. Why would one handmake something if the person receiving it did not matter to them.
“I am sorry.” Yatrov paused, xe had seen it in a Human film once, maybe…? “Can we start over?” A small nod eased Yatrov’s mind and reaffirmed xir’s decision. “I am the one known as Yatrov, and I enjoy reading: fiction, typically.” Xe did not hold out his hand, but stared Giovanni right in the eye.
The smirk on Giovanni’s face told xir that the actions- or lack there of- was not missed. “I am known as Giovanni.” He held out his hand, looking smug and slightly proud of remembering this, as their hands clasped, he said, “I enjoy sandwhiches, science, and conversations on how realistic or achievable a work of fiction can be. It will be a pleasure to work with you.”

Humans were odd, but exceptional Humans lived by a very different set of rules. Intelligence changed their perceptions. Yatrov knew, from personal experience, that they were still Human, still fantastic and horrifying, at their core. Yatrov put down the book xe was reading, looking up to watch Giovanni’s animated expressions as he ranted about machinery. Yes, truly, Humans are Weird.


(Please excuse any grammar/spelling mistakes, my hand has been cramping up lately and it is hard to write at the moment. And I should not be writing sci-fi, because it is NOT my forte, but I had a plot-bunny and felt the need to attempt it. This is basically a shortened version of what I wanted to write, skipping over much of what I actually wanted to put down. Feel free to take the general idea and write something better XD )

So I was going to get my hair cut and-
WARNING: DUMB AU

So after HGSS Giovanni owns this nail/hair salon/ spa treatment place that also sells supplies you need for everyday stuff (best place ever tbh), and Ariana paints your nails all nicely and does your hair. while Archer gives the BEST massages, and when he’s not doing that he’s recommending all the best products, and Petrel picks out the most convenient supplies and he’s a very humble hard worker that loves to help customers and Proton handles the money and buys all the supplies and stuff, while making sure the building looks snazzy af, and then Silver visits with Gold and they always take little candies from the bowl at the front desk where Archer is usually working AND I BETTER STOP BEFORE I DIE OF CUTENESS

anonymous asked:

If the all the villains in pokemon were good guys what do you think they would be doing?

Giovanni runs his countless businesses (without the shady stuff of course.) Silver is the future heir of the companies, but he’d rather work on being a trainer and secretly wishes his dad would work less and spend more quality time with him. (though he would never admit it.) Eventually they have a heart to heart and Silver learns just how hard his dad works to ensure he has a comfortable future.

Maxie and Archie teach together at a local Hoenn University. They plan excursions where they (and students that follow their ideals) clean up parks and beaches and spread awareness about keeping the land and sea free of pollution and trash. Occasionally they bicker about what requires more manpower, the health of the land or the well-being of the sea.

Cyrus lives alone (but happy) in an observatory that his grandfather built for him as a child. When he isn’t enjoying evenings reading by his fireplace, he is stargazing with his high powered telescope. He names comets he discovers and occasionally lets passing by trainers come see the observatory if they beat him in a battle. A young girl named Dawn is a frequent visitor. 

Ghetsis never kidnapped children and claimed them as his which means N lives a happy life with pokemon away from people that would try to abuse his gift. N speaks with trainers and teaches them how to better communicate with their teams. (I don’t know how Ghetsis can be anything other than how he is so please forgive me.) 

Lysandre doesn’t let his frustrations of the world get to him. Yes there are selfish people that take and take, but he stands strong and believes that he can help shape the world to be better and beautiful for everyone. Lysandre Labs continues to invent products to help people all over the world communicate and work together as one. His latest Holo Caster model is due to be released and he can’t wait to share it. 

Lusamine realizes that she needs to give her children space so they can grow, she can’t control them forever. She continues to work hard as the President of the Aether Foundation and her son Gladion has shown interest in continuing her work. Pokemon are cared for at the Foundation and Lillie, while she isn’t off on her pokemon journey, loves to play with the pokemon when she visits her mom.

Guzma makes it his mission to gather up any youth that feel like they aren’t loved or wanted by their families. They form their own family and train pokemon together. Instead of causing ruckus in Alola, the group works to help the people on the islands and offer tips to those that take part in the island challenges. Though late in his attempt, Guzma takes on the trials and his whole team cheers him on as he finally beats them all.

2

Tag yourself, Kanto style

Im totally Erika also if my pokemon mood becomes any higher Im gonna end up doing the other regions too

[…]But then he placed his hand on her stomach and frowned. “There is a change in your condition that I was unaware of.”

“Yes.”
“With Father pursuing an annulment, this has not come at the most fortuitous time. Now no one will believe that swine Giovanni is impotent, and your annulment will not be granted.”

“[…]My condition has nothing to do with Giovanni,” she said coolly. “I bedded him once, and that was on a marriage bed.”
Cesare looked angry, “Now what scoundrel shall I slay?”
Lucrezia reached up to touch her brother’s cheek. “This child is yours, my sweet,” she said. “And can it be more bitter?

—  The Family - Mario Puzo

anonymous asked:

Hey I'm wondering how Ghetsis and Lusamine get along. You know since they are both awful parents.

LUSAMINE: Does Ghetsis look like he’s trying to improve and to stop being a disgusting abuser? No! I’ll openly admit that I’ve done many terrible things to my own poor children, but I never want to be that way again! 

GHETSIS: What are you implying? I’ve never laid a finger on my daughters. I certainly never tried to murder them as you did yours!

LUSAMINE: You see, Anon? I-In the past I did try to disown my children but I’ve moved past that, unlike him! He does not even admit he has a son! And what about Giovanni? He abandoned his young son in the street!

GIOVANNI: Do not bring me into this!

  • Giovanni: From now on, we'll be using code names. You can address me as Eagle One.
  • Giovanni: Cyrus, code name - Been There, Done That.
  • Giovanni: Archie is Currently Doing That.
  • Giovanni: Maxie is It Happened Once in a Dream.
  • Giovanni: Lysandre, code name - if I had to pick a dude.
  • Giovanni: Ghetsis is Eagle Two.
  • Ghetsis: Oh, thank god.