gilbert we...something

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She was there, by his side, when he mourned the breaking up of another short-lived relationship. He watched sad music videos, compounding his already seemingly incalculable misery. He discovered “Alone Again Naturally” by Gilbert O'Sullivan, and he bawled, wailing, “This song sums up my life!“ 

“You’re not completely alone…I’m here, aren’t I?”

He glanced at her briefly, dispassionately, before gluing his glistening eyes back to the screen. “Are you? Are we even real. Nothing feels real anymore.”

She moved closer to him, wrapping her arms around him and resting her head on his shoulder. As he looked down in faint surprise, she softly asked, “Does this feel real?”

He kissed her greedily. She spent the rest of the night doing everything she thought would make him feel better, to help him forget his broken heart and move on.

The next morning, she woke up and instantly sensed it–she was alone. He had gone without a goodbye, without seeing her first-thing-awake face, how it would’ve glowed at him if he’d only stuck around. Instead her face was fallen, as she fought back tears…but failing miserably. She had given too much of herself trying to console a hurting heart, only for him to turn around and leave her alone again…naturally. 

Monday 8:27am
I woke up with you on my mind.
You called me babe last night —
my heart is still pounding.

Tuesday 10:53pm
Today I realized we won’t work.
What we are is hurting her.
And I think she matters more to me than you do.

Wednesday 11:52pm
I broke things off with you today.
She barely said a word.
I’ve never regretted anything more than this.

Thursday 4:03pm
I shouldn’t have sent that message.
You shouldn’t have been so okay with receiving it.

Friday 9:57pm
I almost messaged you today.
I didn’t.

Saturday 8:49pm
I’m walking around town in search of alcohol.
They say that liquor numbs the pain of having a broken heart.
I want to put that to the test.

Sunday 2:32am
I heard you texted a girl you’ve never spoken to before.
I wonder if it’s because you’re trying to replace me.
I can’t help but wish you weren’t.
I thought I was irreplaceable.

—  a week with you on my mind, c.j.n.
Move on, leave, run away, escape this place… but don’t forget about me, about us, about this town. Always remember where you come from so you can appreciate how far you’ve come.
—  c.j.n.