gift or bribe

Moral Question

Is it considered a bribe or a gift if you give someone a gift to gain favor from them?  Even if you have no intention of ever making them use the gift as a bribe, but would like to cover your bases so that they don’t just see you as some random person?

Basically, if Obe gives someone something, planning on not getting anything in return, but knowing that he might, is that a bribe, or just a gift that may benefit him?

Gotta ask @wearepaladin and @we-are-lawyer

anonymous asked:

Omg thank u for opening the inbox for headcanons so quickly??? U are amazing 😭❤ can u pleease write some headcanons about edo period chuuya and dazai ?? It can be general headcanons or relationship/nsfw headcanons with a s.o. U can choose :3

Samurai Chuuya makes me weeaaakkkkkk. I’m going to write Dazai as if he stayed with Mori because in this time period Fukuzawa would 100% have been a top Samurai for a very famous and powerful Shogun, thus not taking in Dazai. I’m going to do a mix of general and domestic/relationship hcs ^^

[Dazai] – Daimyo

• Mori had already claimed quite the standing among Shogun’s, and so Dazai grew up in the higher leagues of society. He learned from Mori how to weave through the minds of the figure heads “above” his class but he knows when he becomes a Shogun he will have the true power.

• Being the youngest Daimyo accepted by the Emperor (who of course is under Mori’s thumb) Dazai’s notoriety is well known among the city. He waltzes into any shop he pleases and stuffs his face until he’s lazily requesting one of the poor workers to “roll him down the hill towards home.” He never has a tab and never has to pay for a drop of Sake.

• Growing up in lavish surroundings Dazai grew extremely bored of his surroundings very quickly. He chooses to explore various parts of the city and outskirts of it that he rarely sees when he’s being summoned by Mori to do this or that. Often his council and page’s find him asleep in a rice patty field with a hat over his face and an empty bottle of booze in his hand when he should be preparing for a meeting.

• Dazai’s cunning strategic intellect does not go unnoticed, and he is often fielding offers from other war lords trying to get him to change sides under the table. Of course he takes every gift and bribe under the sun and lets the lower ranking members of his clan deal with them afterwards. Loyalty is nothing to Dazai, but he doesn’t wish to go up against Mori solely because he doesn’t want to put that much effort into existing.


• Dazai has enough staff to do the cooking, cleaning, and laundry so you’re welcome to kick back and lay in his bed all day (sans clothing is preferred) if you wish. Dazai doesn’t mind if you take over any chores either per se, but he does like when he can come home and relax in a warm bath outside under the stars.

• One of Dazai’s favorite things to pass the time with you (outside of the bedroom) is gambling in the Yoshiwara district on cold fall nights. The only time Dazai doesn’t win (on purpose) is while playing you because he loves seeing your eyes light up when you best him. The spoils of victory are normally presented with a very alluring Dazai offering you a foot rub that starts innocent and ends up with your legs tossed around his neck. Whether he takes you home before this ordeal depends on how much he’s drank and how long he’s willing to wait.

• Dazai is often dragging you to puppet shows held in the Yoshiwara district if he’s getting fidgety from staying in the house due to work. Often he spends the show whispering his own lines in your ear. The only reason neither of you get kicked out for disrupting the show is because he’s Dazai Osamu.

• Summer night fireworks are one of Dazai’s favorite outdoor activities during the warmer months. Generally in the summer Dazai is lazing about in a cool pond on his property, of course dragging you along with him, but at night he has his page pack a nice snack and sake to bring to watch the fireworks. His arm will snake around your waist as the show begins and soon you’re snuggled in his lap as the sky lights up.

• On nights where you’re both in the Yoshiwara district drinking, eating, and just enjoying each other’s company Dazai purposely routes his path away from brothels. Most of his visits were due to him accompanying noblemen and higher to these places he still flirted his way through many women and does not want to run into any of them. If you do so happen to run into one of these various women he is quick to wrap his arm protectively around your waist and try to scoot you away before you notice. Depending on your reaction the night continues as planned or he’s basically on his knees in the street dramatically proclaiming he loves you with all his heart.

[Chuuya] – Samurai

• One, if not the, top paid Samurai working beneath Mori. He is one of the rarities in Edo society where he technically holds the rank of Daimyo but is still a Samurai and solely works as one. Chuuya’s skill is unmatched and widely known—and feared. He commands a small army of his own and takes pride in perfecting his swordsmanship and physical strength.

• His workout regimen is very important to him and he always starts his day with a two mile long run. It’s one of his most calming moments in his day. Watching the sunrise over the rice patty fields and river flowing beneath the bridges. He does get a decent amount of stares from wandering eyes throughout his run but his mind is too focused for him to notice much.

• Chuuya hates being dirty, especially after a battle. While he’s in the throws he doesn’t get agitated by the blood smeared on his clothes and hair but afterwards is a whole other atmosphere. He refuses to go to a public bathhouse unless it is specific to his clan only. However Mori’s gracious pay granted him enough to build his own private one in the backyard of his house. He ends his day in there surrounded by sweet smelling flowers and the moonlight shifting in during warmer months when he leaves the door open.

• Samurai or no Chuuya has refined taste that could rival even the richest noble in the city. He is often found wandering around Yoshiwara looking at obscure vendor’s art. He has a knack for finding masterpieces among these unknown artists and pays more than asking price if he feels the art is valuable. He is not a fan of puppet shows and chooses to go see Kabuki plays with Kouyou instead.


• Chuuya’s expensive tastes waterfall onto you regardless of your own social class. Chuuya doesn’t give a flying fuck about it and if you’re his woman he’s treating you like a queen. Shopping for new kimono’s, especially for events and festivals, is a bi-weekly thing. It takes a while for custom made kimonos so Chuuya always takes you a season early to get everything ready. Of course you have full design and reign on what you choose to wear, but Chuuya always buys.

• Kouyou taught him how to cook (she made sure to knock a man down a peg or two if they commented on young Chuuya learning to do ‘women’s work) and Chuuya enjoys cooking dinner every now and again. His strenuous job makes it tough to do often but on your birthday, anniversary, or New Year Chuuya sends his cooks away and does it himself.

• Introducing you to art and theater is one of the things that excite Chuuya the most. He takes you to Kabuki productions, art shows, and private shows only put on for nobles if you want. Most of your date nights include an extravagant show with drinks and food afterwards. Depending on the season Chuuya loves taking a walk with you through the city, or if it’s snowing heavily Chuuya will pay to have a small section of the hot springs secluded for just the two of you.

• Chuuya often wears his hair in a loose ponytail for work or training, and is more often than not shirtless when he’s practicing martial arts in his backyard but that doesn’t stop him from getting sweaty and dirty. If you so happen to catch him while he’s taking a water break he’ll motion you over with a flick of his finger and ask if you’d like to help him clean up in his private bathhouse.

• Winter is Chuuya’s favorite season for a few reasons, but mainly it gives him an excuse to snuggle up to you any time he can. On rare full days he has off he often covers his room with lavish blankets and pillows so you both can laze around in each other’s arms. Winter festivals give Chuuya an excuse to buy fur and a beautiful white gold hairpin with diamond snowflakes that dangle. These surprises don’t necessarily stop during the summer and spring, but winter to Chuuya is a romantic time of year and he adores spoiling you.

Retconned: Chapter Three

I don’t own anything but the fanfic!

Toby Fox owns Undertale, Goth @Nekophy, Palette: @angexci . Error/Geno/fresh @loverofpiggies  Reaper:@renrink Retconned Goth… well i own this version. Underswap!Sans by Popcornp1nce.  Dream by @jokublog Cross!Sans and Cross!Chara by @jakei95

The first time Blueberry met Goth, he thought Error had kidnapped a new victim. The small eternal child had thought it was hilarious when Blue had grabbed him and tried to escape.

Goth would admit his humour was a bit twisted after living with Error.

“Wow, if you hadn’t shown me your house i would have never have found it in my wondering,” Blueberry said as he wondered the small cozy house smack dab in the anti-void.

Of course Blueberry’s stomach rumbled as this time he’d been kidnapped just before lunch.

“The kitchens this way,” Goth grinned.

Of course the always energetic Blueberry Sans, quickly noticed certain missing supplies.

“Where’s you taco supplies?” he asked.

“Ah… I haven’t learned to make those yet, but I might have the things needed in the basement food storage,” Goth said thoughtful.

‘No taco supplies… sacrilege’ Blueberry thought.

“Wait… how does a house in the anti-void have a basement?” he asked, after all how would one dig through nothing to build it and not see it from the outside.

“Why wouldn’t it?” Goth asked totally innocently.

Goth only caused the kitchen to burn once.

Then Cross appeared and stole all the tacos.


“Blue.. are you in?” a voice asked, the small Sans blinked as he recognized the voice.

“Come on in Dream, I was only about to make dinner,” Blues called, moments later Dream entered the kitchen a small frown on his face.

“Um… I have some questions about Error, we all had an interesting confrontation with him,” Dream said.

“Error huh, been three months since the last kidnapping… have a few more till the next one, Blues said frowning, sighing he turned off the stove knowing this might take awhile.

“Wait… you have kidnapping scheduled?” Dream said wide eyed at him.

“Only for the last five years, easier for no one to be killed and to see Gothy,” Blues said cheerfully.

“Would… Gothy… be a small skeleton kid that looks a lot like Geno and Reaper with a scythe and can travel in the anti-void?” Dream asked.

“Yeah, didn’t you know. Goth’s been living in the anti-void for years. Error’s really protective about him, since leaving the anti-void too long will kill him,” Blues said, really Goth was such a sweet shy kid… he just wished Goth could chance leaving the void often.

“Die?” Dream said surprised.

Blues looked down at the floor for a moment, he didn’t know what had happened to Goth to make him end up pretty much trapped there to survive… and from the look on Error’s face that day when he started to ask.. he had decided h didn’t want to know.

“Its, not for me to say. Ask Goth,” Blue said, then turned on the stove and proceeded to ignore his friend… sometimes it was best to have some secrets.


A slightly tired Goth yawned and rapped a wondering hand away from his dinner, he glared at Cross who was pouting at the taco’s.

“Come on Cross, go make your own food… this is why I can never make Taco’s anymore,” Goth said glaring, his form shifted to fell his self more prone to violence.

“Aw come on… just one, i even got a gift for you,” Cross bribed.

-Hey! I picked them out- the every ghostly Cross!Chara protested, Goth suppressed a shiver wishing once again he hadn’t gained the ability to see the other part of Cross. Chara of course thought it sweet, after all ne had someone else other then Cross to tease.

“Gifts,” Goth said form shifting to Canon Goths form, he absently pushed two Taco’s to the other skeleton and happily received a wrapped box.

“Ohhhh!” Goth said opening it, new clothing that didn’t match anything any of his selves had ever worn.

“Be right back!” Goth said and raced to his room to try it on.

Cross grabbed the rest of the Taco’s happily.


Goth liked the clothing even if how every different they looked from what he always wore, but eh supposed that something different was the point. His scarf was still around his neck but tucked under a white hood shawl combo with a golden orb/disk dangling down the front.

His shirt underneath was a very very light grey that tucked into large fingerless gloved with red ribbons around part of it and handing off them. Pants were white and tucked into white boots with yellow-gold edged tops and a small gold disk on the front of them.

‘Could use more Black’ Goth thought, after all he’d been wearing black since his uncle dressed him that day.

The clothing felt weird against his bones, and if it wasn’t for the red and gold bits he could probably almost blend into the antivoid.

“Whats this..” he said spotting something under where the clothing had been gold in colour… and glowing?

Quickly he grabbed it up and stared, it was a lantern and in its centre glowing was a save point.

How the heck did Cross get a save point?


Sami | better man won | Zayn



Okay, so Seth is your ex of 2 years and you’re called up from NXT with Sami Zayn, to the main roster. You’re put into a valet gimmick with Seth, who promptly begins to pursue you.. Meanwhile, you have fallen in love with Sami, who has no idea and has fallen for you too but he thinks you only view him as a friend. 

After !Heel Seth pushes too far with the over the top gestures to win you back, you wind up letting your feelings pour out to Sami in a steamy first kiss that gets caught on camera backstage.








and a huge thank you to @fan-fiction-galore who is amazing and helped me so fucking much with this!!!

Originally posted by thearchitectwwe

“Did someone die in my dressing room or did I miss something?” I shut the door firmly behind me  sneezing and eyes already beginning to water… It’s not that I didn’t appreciate the gesture, but… Seth had done it again, he’d mixed up what I actually like and what he ‘thinks/pretends he knows I liked’ and he’d gotten nothing but daisies for some reason totally unknown to me.. I’m allergic to them and you’d think that after 2 years of dating the jerk, he’d at least attempt to learn that..

I promptly groaned when I saw Seth making his way over. Naturally, that smug and self absorbed jerk had something to do with it. Biting my lip, I prepared to once again ward off his advances.

“Did you get my surprise? Happy Birthday! I remembered you love daisies…”

“It’s not my…” I started but Seth, as usual, but in. And when New Day made their way over and Xavier raised Francesca, ready to play, I shook my head. “Don’t.”

I turned my attention back to Seth. “We dated for 2 years, Seth… And not one damn time in those two years did you get my birthday right.” I opened the door to my dressing room and turned my gaze back to him, tapping my foot. “Seriously? It looks like the CCU or a funeral parlor in here!” I whined as I pursed my lips.

I hated the way his face fell, but I hated the way lately he seemed hell bent on popping up everywhere I  was, usually with some off the wall ‘token of his affection’. Creative, however, seemed to like it and as soon as I got called up, they put me into an angle with my ex. Which I’ll admit, was hard at first.. It was hard not to give in to him, to go back to the way things were. But almost as soon as I realized that his behavior hadn’t changed a bit and the only difference now was that he bought me gifts or bribes, well… That quickly made me see the light.

Besides, these days, I had my eye on someone so much better and lately, I was starting to suspect that Seth was only even pursuing me further because somehow, he knew that and he hated losing at anything.


I shook my head, stopping him from speaking further. “Just don’t talk, okay? I can’t with you because all you do is talk. You never stop and listen! Did you learn nothing when we broke up, Seth?”

“Oh come on! That’s not fair! I learned, okay? Besides,  I’m just trying to make sure you know that whoever this other guy is, he’s nothing like me! Who is it, huh? Tell me and I’ll go show ‘em you belong with me!” and that was enough for me, I growled to myself and turned on my heels, stomping off down the hall, leaving him standing there, holding a bouquet of the daisies he’d gotten me.

I was more worried about finding someone else at the moment. Sami was supposed to be in the arena already, talking to Creative, something about his debut match tonight. I’d been waiting rather impatiently to see him all night. I hadn’t seen him yet and frankly, that worried me a little bit. I had a plan, sort of.

Sasha said that the reason he hasn’t responded to any of my flirting is because well…. I’ve been doing the same things I do around friends to him and naturally, the giant goofball thinks that I’m just being friendly. Tonight I was going to go for it, I was going to find those little friend boundaries that he seemed to think he was stuck in – because Sasha said that he confided in one of the guys that he really, really liked me and they’d told her- and I was going to steam roll right over  them.

It was obvious to me that I was going to have to make a really, really big move.. And the sooner I did it, the sooner I could be happy, the sooner Seth would see that yes, this time, the word no was my final answer and yes, he’d lost me and all the over the top grand gestures in the world was not going to bring me back. That my heart completely and totally belonged to Sami Zayn and my mind was made up, nobody else was going to do.

Lost in my own thoughts, I turned a corner, still fuming about the flowers and I found myself chest to chest with the very person I’d set off to look for in the first place. Large and warm hands steadied me and Sami looked down at me with a friendly look of concern. “Are you okay?”

“Flowers.. Too many..” I bit my lip, wanting to punch myself in the throat because naturally, this whole bold and brave approach was harder than I thought, especially if every single time I set eyes on Sami Zayn, my brain turns to tapioca pudding and I’m soaked and tense and practically begging for him on the inside and I literally cannot think straight, I swear I have it worse than a teenage girl.

But it’s not just that; this is nothing like my usual pursuits or relationships.. I want to kiss him goodnight, I want to share a shower with him, I want to steal his shirts and sneak up from behind him and hug him, give him massages when he’s had a rough day at the gym.. The guy even has me trying to learn how to BAKE, for God’s sake and that’s not.. It’s just not who I was before, okay? It’s not. But I like this so much better. Being his friend used to be enough, or I was doing a fair job convincing myself it was, but… I wanted more. I was crazy in love with Sami Zayn.

He eyed me; a confused look.

I bit my lip again, harder this time because my nose was filled with the scent of his cologne and his chest was pushing against me and it was firm and oh dear God, he was tall.. taller than I realized… and his eyes were almost this golden brown, like pools of chocolate and again, I was staring like an idiot and hypnotized.

“Interrupting something?” came the all too familiar voice from behind and I tensed a little, looking up at Sami as I mouthed, “And he found me.” and it must have kicked in a little, part of why I’d been practically running when we collided and he stopped me from knocking us both down because he chuckled and eyed Seth. “Actually, Seth, I was kind of talking to __. She is my friend.”

And there it was, that word again.

The word I definitely wanted to disappear from any and all conversation between Sami and I. I swallowed hard and I could feel the cameramen surrounding us because like… This was intense, it looked that way, it certainly felt that way and some of them must have thought it was a new storyline.

The thought had my stomach churning, but carpe diem, right?

I took a deep breath and I moved closer to Sami, further away from Seth, looking up at Sami apologetically as he raised a brow, a little confused. My hand curled in the fabric of his olive green t shirt and I gave this giggle that I can only describe as three parts nervous energy and two flirtatious.. Yeah, it wasn’t flattering at all, and trust me, I can assure you that I’m normally nothing if not at the top of my flirting game when I’m in full blown flirt mode..

Well, obviously not always, Sami just… He throws me for a loop every single time, okay? I don’t know why because if it’s not obvious already, it should be obvious by now that before I met and befriended and then fell for Sami, he’s kind of the polar opposite of the type of guy I thought I wanted?

But hey, that’s love for you, am I right?

Sami eyed me, cheeks reddening. Seth was gaping in sheer confusion because of all the guys on the roster he somehow never had a thought that I’d fall for Sami and he was shocked beyond belief.

“___” both men said it at the same time, but I gently pressed a fingertip to Sami’s lips, cutting off whatever he’d been about to say while raising to tiptoe, sliding my arms around his neck and my fingers through his hair, molding myself against him, careful to leave a little distance just in case he wanted to push me away, to save face if he shot me down like I was so afraid he was going to. At first, it took him a few seconds to realize what I was doing, but when he did, his hands slid down, moving from my hips to my ass, lifting slightly so that I didn’t have quite so far to stand as I nipped at his lip and his tongue slid past mine, finding my tongue, taking dominance in the kiss.

“Him?” Seth was coughing uncomfortably now, and still gaping in shock and all I could honestly do was laugh into the kiss as Sami asked with a curious look into my eyes, “___?”

“Yeah?” I mumbled in a huskier tone, eyes fluttering open a little wider to look up at Sami.

“Not that this isn’t completely fantastic but… Is there a reason you’re kissing me?” Sami’s voice was deep and gravelly and it literally ripped through my core, further soaking my panties. My response to that and to his question was to grab onto his t shirt harder, molding myself completely against his body and I nodded.

“Why the hell are you kissing him?” and the question had me turning slightly, I was fully aware of both sets of eyes fixed on me, and the fact that Seth was angry, the look of jealousy making his eyes burn a brighter shade of brown.

“Because, Seth… You wanted to know who, right? It’s Sami.. I want Sami. Not you and empty promises and a literal fuck ton of flowers and weird gifts. I want Sami.” I made sure to slow down the last three words really slow because sometimes Seth has a hard time comprehending the word no, or being shot down in general and I wanted to make it crystal clear to Seth that yes, this was happening. I also wanted to make it crystal clear to Sami too.

I heard Sami coughing a little, I turned back to look up at Sami again just in time to see the look of shock on his face change to a smirk as his hands gripped my hips, pulling me closer. “You want me, huh?” he mumbled against my lips, giving me a gentle peck as he looked over my shoulder at Seth and made it a point to tell him firmly, “Obviously, Rollins, she’s not gonna walk you to the ring tonight. You can go now, buddy.”

Seth pointed to himself, a brow raised as he shook his head. “Did you seriously just dismiss me?” and then, he eyed me. “And have you lost your mind? Him? Don’t make me laugh. It’ll last a week and you’ll be begging to come back to me. Have fun with this whatever the hell it is.”

“Seth?” I asked in the sweetest no nonsense tone I could muster, “Kindly fuck off? We’re trying to have a moment. You know, not everything is about you, right?” and finally, Seth turned and walked away.

“What did you mean when you walked up though? You said flowers… too many.” Sami chuckled as he bought up what I’d said earlier while trying to make my brain work properly around him. I sighed and then bit my lip as I rested my head on his chest and laughing softly, “I arrived at the arena to find my dressing room crammed full of flowers.. Like it was so full I couldn’t even get in.. It looked like they were holding a wake in my dressing room? I think that a stagehand is getting the flowers out right now… The worst part?”

“What’s that, tiny?” Sami was trying not to laugh and I lightly smacked at his chest, pouting. “They were frickin daisies..For my birthday..” as Sami raised a brow and then asked, “Aren’t you allergic to those? And wasn’t your birthday last week? Wow.. that’s just.. I mean, E for Effort, right?”

“Mhmm.. So I had to get away, get a crew member to get them out. I’d give him an E for effort but he was only doing it because this is all a game to him.. And there’s someone I want so much more..” I was leaning against him and he slid me up into his arms, squeezing me against him as he smiled into another long and slow kiss again caught by the cameras backstage, neither of us really caring at this point.. “Can I change in your dressing room? I mean since I’m not walking Seth down tonight.”

“Anymore. I mean if you… If you want to.” Sami cut in, licking his lips as his eyes fixed on me and he leaned in, brushing hair out of my eyes, nervously shuffling his feet  as I nodded and I gave a soft laugh, correcting myself. “Anymore.”

“That’s better.” Sami scooped me up and carried me down the hallway and into his dressing room.

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(Originally posted here during Asexual Awareness Week 2015 for #AAWFC.)

Zabini’s Masquerade

The annual Halloween masquerade at the Zabini estate was the stuff of legend. They had begun before Mrs. Zabini ever married. Now, several decades and seven husbands later, it was the most highly sought after invitation of the year.

Rumors ran wild about what went on at the party. Those who attended never spoke of it and refused to confirm or deny whether Mrs. Zabini actually had an adolescent Antipodean Opaleye that never left her side, even as she moved through the ballroom greeting guests.

Wixen tried everything they could think of to get an invite. Lavish gifts, personal favors, political bribes, even offers of a very discreet but very sexual nature, all of which meant nothing when it came to the masquerade. No one could figure out how Zabini created her guest list. There were all manner of people who attended: rich, poor, muggleborn, pureblood, homemakers, shop owners, celebrities, politicians. Some even travelled great distances, crossing oceans and needing five or more portkey transfers. Some couples and triads came, but most wixen attended alone as the invitation did not allow for plus ones. The list made no sense to outsiders, and again, the guests weren’t going to talk.

One witch had managed to catch a glimpse of the invitation (before it burst into purple rose petals in her sister’s hands). All she knew for sure was that dress robes and masks were required, and all must come in the party colors of black, gray, white, and purple. She thought it all rather ill-suited to a Halloween party, but she wouldn’t dare say that out loud. She wanted her sister to put in a good word for her in the hopes of finding herself on the guest list next year.

Yes, absolutely everyone wanted to attend Mrs. Zabini’s Halloween masquerade. Few would ever receive the pleasure of doing so.

Timeline - Prince’s Gambit

*** Timeline from reading Prince’s Gambit, with added time details from the other volumes inserted into it. Will note when a detail is from another Volume or source, but falls with in Prince’s Gambit timeline.  Further notes at end of post. ***

* Note: This timeline is for events taking place during the Prince’s Gambit timeline only.  For posts of the timeline of events prior to Prince’s Gambit or continued from Kings Rising forward, please check my “Captive Prince” tags page in the Menu.

Spoilers Ahead if you click the Read more button!!!

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Draco Malfoy and the Squeaky Shoes

(This story was inspired by this video)

From the moment he was born, Draco Lucius Malfoy was a spoiled child. His father determined that his son and heir would want for nothing, and took every opportunity to shower him with gifts. Before he learned to speak, Draco learned that he had only to look covetously at something, and his father would immediately purchase it for him. No matter how much it cost, no matter if it was even for sale, if Draco wanted it, Lucius bought it.

Draco’s mother was wary, but knew her husband. When Lucius was determined, not even his beloved Narcissa could change his mind. So she kept her misgivings and doubts to herself, even as her indulged child learned to want more.

The first time Lucius was unable to grant his wish, Draco threw a tantrum. He screamed, he wailed, he threw himself to the ground and beat his tiny fists on the floor. He wanted, and nothing would satisfy him.

Lucius, unaccustomed to dealing with wayward toddlers, appealed to his wife for help. She folded her hands, thinned her lips, and said “You got yourself into this mess, darling.”

She never called him ‘darling.’ Not unless she was very, very displeased. Lucius tried everything he could think of to appease his son – but nothing worked. He begged. He pleaded. He entreated. He offered gifts and bribes and dearMerlinyoucanhaveanythingjuststopthatinfernalracket. Sometimes Draco would deign to accept the bribes, but they merely staved off the storm. It grew, dark and thunderous, behind his large, expressive gray eyes.

Lucius developed tics, and would twitch and shudder whenever they neared anything that Draco might covet. His face became pinched and drawn, his hair thinned, from all the times he tore it out in frustration. He developed unsightly purple bruises under his eyes, and felt a nervous breakdown stalking him, teasing around the frazzled edges of his mind.

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The Sushi and Sashimi Conundrum

Vet!Guk AU where Tae rushes to his clinic first thing in the morning, just as Guk is opening up. He’s totally frantic and flailing everywhere, eyelashes wet with tears, and Guk has no idea what to do because he’s really cute but he’s also really emotional? Over a goldfish??? But he’s also so cute?????! and Guk doesn’t know what to do because he doesn’t want the cute stranger to be upset but he also doesn’t really want him to leave? *w* (@tranquaos)

Pairing: Taekook

Jeongguk has the best job in the world. Being a veterinarian is, honest to God, hands down, the best job ever. There’s just so much fluff. So much fluff and hair and feathers and the occasional scales but Jeongguk loves it all. Big animals, small animals, they all pull at Jeongguk’s heartstrings. He might not be the biggest fan of bunnies these days but that’s just because his housemate Jimin keeps insisting he looks like one on steroids and no, he does not.

Jeongguk swipes his tongue over the top row of his teeth, those teeth that he will go to the grave denying look even the slightest bit of bunny-like. Digging into his locker, he pulls a clean shirt over his head, inky hair still damp from the shower, happy to be clean and fresh again.

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anonymous asked:

RFA meeting MC's parents for the first time!!


  • nervous
  • wreck
  • like he’s such a baby and its so soon and
  • well now he’s here so he can’t go back
  • the rfa members would give him a pep talk to help him be confident


  • ok
  • she normally doesn’t get nervous
  • but
  • this was different
  • anything could happen with your parents
  • but you assured her it would be ok
  • she just had to hold your hand the whole time


  • confident much?
  • he was so ready to show your parents that he was the only one for you
  • then he heard your dad was a ex military general
  • and then he started t o  s w e a t 
  • but he didn’t let you see that bc his pride
  • but you knew he was nervous so you gave him a quick kiss before leaving


  • flowers, check
  • gifts, check
  • unconsciously he sought out gifts and flowers to bribe your parents
  • what a helpless dork
  • “Jumin, let’s just eat here. I’ll cook”
  • “The parents of my beautiful girlfriend deserve more than that”
  • “Jumin you’re overreacting”
  • he wouldn’t budge, and took your parents out to a 5 star restaurant
  • and your parents were shocked
  • and you couldn’t help but laugh at all 3 of them 


  • He was a nervous wreck
  • the poor meme baby!
  • He was pacing in front of the door of your parents house like his life depended on it
  • “Seven it will be fine! They’ll love you.”
  • “01110111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01101001 01100110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01111001 00100000 01100100 01101111 01101110 00100111 01110100″ 
  • “Don’t speak code to me they will too.”
  • You pulled him by your side and gave him a quick kiss
  • which turned into a longer kiss
  • and then he wasn’t stopping
  • and did the door open?
  • now Seven and you were staring in horror as your parents watched you make out on the front door step

anonymous asked:

AU where Baekhyun is a rich son of a CEO of a company. His car breaks down and he goes to a car dealer to get it fixed. The girl who's working on his car is really pretty and he develops a small crush on her xD

I don’t really know what happened to this, Baekhyun is kind of a prick?? but kind of cute?? and somehow Chanyeol managed to worm his way into have a short cameo?? I really hope you like it! I ended up getting a little carried away ahh~~~

Heres part 2 if anyone is interested :

“I’m ready to pick up my car”

“Sorry Mr.Byun but we said that it wouldn’t be done until tomorrow in the morning  earliest”

“I’ll pay you double”

Baekhyun could hear the cogs turning in his head before the man sighed “I’ll get someone on it right away sir"

Baekhyun was in a good mood today, so he would give them a few hours before he went to collect his precious Mercedes and that he did, he generously gave them a whole three hours before he got one of his chauffeurs to drive him to the repair shop. When he got there it was pretty empty, the only sound heard was the clang of something hitting metal and rock music played at a low volume.


He waited a few minutes before calling out again, he was starting to get irritated and an annoyed Baekhyun is not something you want to be around, especially when he feels his times being wasted. Though it didn’t last long as any unpleasantness was washed away as he saw a short brunette that walked with short purposeful strides making her way towards him.

“Is there anything I can help you with?”

“I’m here to pick up my car” He flashed her a charming smile “The Mercedes”

She turned her head  but not before Baekhyun caught the subtle eye roll, her sweet feminine features turning hard.

“You we’rent expected till later today, I haven’t finished working on it yet”

“You work here? like on the cars”

She crossed her arms raising an eyebrow “Yeah? Why is that a surprise”

As he stared at her dark eyes that seemed to swallow him up and the way her plump lips were pressed together into a line, her head cocked to the side eyeing him carefully, he couldn’t help but find her brassy attitude interesting.

“Because your really pretty” He said testing the waters.

She scoffed “Pretty? Its really nice to know that there are misogynistic arseholes that still believe in gender stereotypes”

He smirked at her sour expression “Ouch, is that anyway to speak to a paying customer?”

“What are you going to do tell on me?” She said making eye contact as a battle of prides took place.

“And if i say yes?” He said smiling, the Cheshire cat appearing on his face, there was something so entertaining about a pretty face making such an angry expression.

“Go ahead, I can assure you Boss likes me way more than he likes you”

He followed her towards his car, she was the first person to take him head on and he was kind of surprised to say he liked it. He wanted to know her, delve into her mind and break down every wall until she was wrapped around his little finger.

He cleared his throat, Baekhyun wasn’t use to apologizing “I didn’t mean what I said before, Im sorry if I-”

She looked up from where she was examining his car “I think I’ll live”

“Let me take you out” He blurted out.

“No” She replied with no hesitation.

He walked towards, leaning against the car blocking her way as he towered over her. “Come on let me show you a good time”

“Your not my type, now move so I can get your paper work”

He let her push past a smirk never leaning his face “So what is your type?”

“Oh I don’t know” a strangely soft voice for such a disagreeable girl called “I guess someone who isn’t narcissistic?”

She came out of the small office and threw him his keys “We’ll send you the bill”

Baekhyun knew trying to convince her right now would be useless, she didn’t seem like the type to be easily swayed, especially not by someone she deemed unworthy of her time, in that respect a little like Baekhyun. He spent the next week sending her gifts, sometimes chocolate, other times flowers. He once sent her a necklace from Tiffany’s but she returned that straightaway, sending it back to his office without even a note.

“Baek what the hell is this?” Chanyeol said eyeing the huge bouquet of flowers that lay ready to be sent off in Baekhyuns office.

“Get your gangly legs of my desk” he replied shoving the giant who had already managed to knock over the cup of coffee that had had been sitting there minding its own business.

Baekhyun had known Chanyeol since he could remember, he was the eldest son of a businesses tycoon, one of the top three in Korea actually but to Baekhyun he was just an overgrown child who liked to do anything but work, always causing scandals for his family.

“If your interested in a hot girl with a shitty personality, I can give you plenty of numbers, that’s all I have on my phone” He said stretching his legs across the desk even further.

Baekhyun sighed leaning back on his chair, there was nothing Chanyeol hated more than being told what to do so he should be prepared for those skinny legs to be stretched across his desk every time he visited now.

“This is different, she’s not just any girl, she knows what she wants, who she wants and she had no problem with saying no” He smirked “I like that, I don’t even think my money could buy her”

Chanyeol pulled his legs back as he leaned over “Ooh be careful Baek, If I didn’t know you better I’d say that you had developed a little crush”

“Shut up and get out, I’m busy besides shouldn’t you be working right now?”

He shrugged “There’s no need to get so touchy” Chanyeol stood up “I’m never on time anyway, see you later shorty”

Baekhyun didn’t know why he felt so nervous as he he drove to the repair shop, she had to say yes it would hurt his pride too much otherwise. He parked carefully and waited a few minutes trying to collect his thoughts before he grabbed the flowers and made his way to the entrance.

“Hey welcome! is there anything I can-oh” Her smile fell as soon as their eyes met.

“What a warm welcome”

She shrugged crossing her arms like she was ready to start a fight.

“Are you always so…” He searched his head for the least offensive words he could think of for such a snarky attitude.

“Rude? abrasive? unpleasant” She smiled “Only to those that deserve it”

“Oh come on, I brought you flowers” He said putting them into her arms.

He felt something tingle in his stomach as he saw her trying to repress a smile “The answer it still no”

“But I bought you all those gifts” He said, he could feel a tantrum coming on, trying all he could to suppress it.

“I thought they were gifts not bribes but I can drive to my apartment to the get the flowers and I’ll buy you the chocolates”

“They were expensive” He said as he walked closer to her closing the distance further.

She pushed her hand against his chest to stop him “I’ll figure it out”

That did it for him and he could feel his inner child coming out “But why! I;m not a bad guy, just give me a chance to prove it” he whined.

For the first time since he met her he saw her smile, her entire face lit up as she flashed him a wide toothy grin. “That was unexpected”

She nodded in his direction like she had just made an important decision “Okay but under 3 conditions”


“You stop sending me gifts, I can’t be bought” She said handing him back the flowers “Two I get to choose where we go, a 5 star restaurant doesn’t sound like a good time to me”

He smirked of course it doesn’t.

“And three if I decided your still not my type by the end of the night you don’t bother me anymore”

He nodded a genuine laugh escaping his lips.

“I’f you give me you number Baekhyun I’ll text you later”

After they exchanged numbers he flashed her a smile which she returned shyly and as he walked away he couldn’t help but feel excited because not only was he going on a date but she had called him Baekhyun for the first time rather than you.

Headcanon 1: Q Branch Cat

(if you knew me you’d know I can never shut up about the cats ;) This post is dedicated to @theatrekidsherlock and @a-forger-and-a-point-man)

Contrary to popular belief, the cat bed and litter box at Q branch, shown in the photos from Blood, Sweat and Bond is NOT for Q’s own cats back at home. Q’s own fur babies are spoiled kids and Q branch can’t afford the chaos when the two are forced to compete for the only set of cat bed and litter box.

So who’s that mysterious cat?

She’d been there for nearly a decade before SIS building got blown up. When Q started to work for MI6 as the youngest member of the Q branch staff, his real talents in coding and hacking were not that acknowledged. He actually found his work place intimidating, opting for solitude and space for his own side projects in his free time. As for the cat, to Q branch she was just a mouser and she didn’t get much affection. She was bored and lonely. The noises of Q’s fanatical typing after midnight caught her curiosity. They bonded over canned tuna (Q’s favourite night snack when served with bread) and quiet company.

Q, then a senior Q branch member, actually escaped the explosion because he was taking the cat to the vet. She saved his life. Q tried to settle her in his warm and cozy home but his two kittens protested rather bloodily fiercely. So she got to live in the lab. Thankfully the newest recruits adore her. Still, she likes Q the most and hates that annoying walking suited scratching post who bothers her human too frequently.

PS. The cat bed is a bribe gift from Accounting. 

PPS. The cat-fan minions call her C (for cat of course) to irritate Q on purpose but little do they know her name indeed starts with C. (sorry I have to :P)

Bonus writing prompts (yes @monologues91 I shamelessly follow your format ;))

  • Major Boothroyd’s first encounter with the Q branch cat.
  • Young not-yet!Q getting into trouble because of Q branch cat.
  • Q branch cat POV for anything, but in particular 00Q.




C: “Everytime I come back home there’s always, like, a new gift. It’s like he’s bribing me to stay there.”
- “He got me a foosball table recently. well it’s not really mine but he bought it for us both.”
J: “It’s yours until we move out and then-”

Int: *talks about breaking up with roommate prank* (to joe) Did you believe it at first?

basically every time Caspar goes away Joe just randomly buys him gifts for when he comes back like IMAGINE JOE AT THE MALL OR SOMETHING AND THEN HE SEES SOMETHING COOL AND GOES “Oh caspar would really like that” AND THEN HE JUST GOES AND BUYS IT AND SURPRISES CASPAR WITH IT I AM SO HURT

*Click for slightly bigger picture*

Hey guys! 

I wanted to thank everyone for being so patient with me lately and my radio silence. Now that my work is over I still -HAVE- to finish my thesis in the month of May, but with the break I’m at least be able to be a little more responsive, go back to the whole “ask day” and all that, ACTUALLY RESPONDING TO MESSAGES. 

As a bribe gift to make up for being silent, here’s a preview/WIP of a Gaster!Sans gif I’ve been working on. 

This is my favorite scene in Undertale, so working on it is pretty relaxing (aside from the damning amount of times I’ve accidentally lost my work on this/times I scrapped it and started all over). 

Thank you again my Skelefam for always rocking. More to come soon.


Superpowers are real, and the battle between heroes and villains is continuing. You’ve managed to fly somehow under the radar with your God leveled abilities. But now heroes and villains are sending you gift baskets and bribes to join their cause.

126. I am not allowed to use exotic birds to carry my mail for me.

I didn’t even know there were that many types of birds! - PP

What … Did you think owls were the only type? - JP

Well, no. I just … You don’t see a huge variety of bird in the London area. - PP

How did you even train the birds to do what you wanted them to do? - RL

What can I say? I have a gift. - SB

He bribed them. - JP

That I did. - SB

  • Aries: Asseverate - to affirm or declare positively or affirmatively; Splenetic - bad-tempered or spiteful; Fealty - formal acknowledgement of loyalty
  • Taurus: Proffer - to present for acceptance; Golconda - a source of great wealth; Otiose - producing no effective result, or to be at leisure
  • Gemini: Loquacious - given to fluent, yet excessive, talk; Jink - to move quickly or unexpectedly with sudden turns and shifts, to dodge; Two-bit - cheap or trivial
  • Cancer: Sop - a conciliatory bribe, gift, or gesture; Rectitudinous - piously self-righteous; Empyrean - of or relating to heaven
  • Leo: Jehu - a driver of a coach or cab; Foofaraw - frills and flashy finery, alternatively, unnecessary drama or making a fuss out of nothing; Viva voce - by word of mouth
  • Virgo: Fantod - a state of irritability or tension; Zeitgeber - an environmental agent or event that provides the stimulus setting of an organism; Nugatory - trifling, inconsequential
  • Libra: Uxorial - characteristic of a wife; Attitudinize - to pose or to assume an affected attitude; Sublimate - to express an unpleasant thing in a socially acceptable way
  • Scorpio: Chapfallen - in a depressive mood, low in spirit; Traduce - to violate or betray; Steganography - the art of concealing a message, image or file within another
  • Sagittarius: Quodlibet - a philosophical or theological idea proposed for disputation; Hachure - to shade or use fine lines to indicate slopes on a map; Miscible - capable of being mixed
  • Capricorn: Immure - to enclose within walls; Kakistocracy - government by the worst people; Olla Podrida - a richly seasoned stew of slowly simmered meat and vegetables
  • Aquarius: Promethean - daringly original or creative; Youthquake - a shift in cultural norms influenced by young people; Eldritch - weird, sinister, or ghostly
  • Pisces: Diapason - the entire range of musical notes and tones; Innocuous - harmless, not likely to give offence; Simpatico - likeable and easy to get along with
TMNT Fic: Weathering the Storm

TITLE: Weathering the Storm
FANDOM: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ( turtle-sketches‘s verse)
MAIN CHARACTERS: Michelangelo and Donatello
GENRE: Hurt/Comfort and Family
SUMMARY: They’ve all had storms they had to pass through in their lives, but Mikey is just about to find out how rocky this one is. 
AUTHOR’S NOTE: This is a gift fic/motivation bribing story for turtle-sketches, who’s comics and drawings just give me life. Seriously, you need to see the their drawings and the story lines. It’s fantastic. I borrowed the turtles from her universe so all of the mentioned characters, such as May, Mabel, and Bonnie, all belong to turtle-sketches. She wanted some Mikey and Donnie bonding and until I started writing, I didn’t know how much I needed it too. :D Enjoy! Beta’d by turtle-sketches


The week had started off pleasant. It was their yearly trip to the farmhouse, which Casey graciously let them borrow even though he and April weren’t coming that year. In fact, this trip was considerately lighter than years past. Splinter had decided he wanted to stay home this spring, and enjoy the quiet of the lair while his sons were gone. Of course, nobody dared mentioned that a certain lady friend had started coming by more and more. They just smiled brightly.

May wanted to spend some mommy-daughter time with Mabel before the new baby was born and Bonnie had already made plans with some of her friends, so Leo decided that they would make it a retreat for just the four brothers, away from the distractions of the city and the harsh winter they had experienced. Their leader had made side-eyes at Donnie when he said this, who was too preoccupied with packing to notice. Mikey had to admit, Donnie had seemed a little down lately, but refused to tell him what the matter was. It was the only reason he didn’t baulk at the thought of a whole week away from his girls. Maybe this trip would bring Donnie back to his old self, or at very least, enlighten Mikey to why his brother was acting so strange.

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beantheshoeelf  asked:

I absolutely adore The Honourable Miss Hooper!!! If you feel like continuing with it, I would love to see Molly waltz into the police station and flirtatiously bribe Sherlock with food for inclusion on a particularly interesting case he won't let her in on. Of course he won't at first, because Sherlock is Sherlock, but hey, playing games with Molly is what he's best at, am I right?

Thank you!!! I did think it was unlikely I’d continue this—it was a pipe dream, nothing but a pipe dream—but bugger it all, who can say no to 1920s!Sherlolly and food bribery and UST? I certainly can’t. (Previous instalment here.)

Hurrying into the kitchen and seeing Molly with an apron tied around her waist and a mess adorning the counter in front of her, Sally came to an immediate stop. Molly Hooper, though she did many things and was an accomplished young lady, did not bake. The deflated, rather lacklustre, flan in front of her was an unfortunate indicator.

Sally’s mouth twitched with a laugh as she stepped forward. “What are you doing?”

“Baking,” Molly said with familiar brightness, though she frowned, lips pursed, when she looked back at the flan. “It’s not going… exactly to plan.”

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