Signs as female singers
  • Aries: Rihanna
  • Taurus: Aaliyah
  • Gemini: Lana Del Rey
  • Cancer: Kali Uchis
  • Leo: Mariah Carey
  • Virgo: FKA Twigs
  • Libra: Selena Quintanilla-Pérez
  • Scorpio: SZA
  • Sagittarius: Ariana Grande
  • Capricorn: Beyoncé
  • Aquarius: Kelela
  • Pisces: Jhené Aiko
  • this may not be their real astrological sign -Silva✨
Normal Horoscope:

Aries: Every time a room is painted it gets smaller and angrier.

Taurus: Your love life may be in trouble as you are invaded by the parthian empire. Keep your javelins ready.

Gemini: The stars say some of the problems in your life are your fault. This is an injustice, find god and kill him.

Cancer: Hedge your bets, its all you can do unless you were born wealthy.

Leo: As you sit staring at the screen something desperately wishes to give you a back rub but it does not want to frighten you.

Virgo: That human figure will turn out to be a mass of tangled wire. Cut her free.

Libra: Increase your personal wealth and save wisely for the future. Eat precious metals.

Scorpio: Self esteem is not an illusion it is a physical weapon forged by gods that is effective against mounted enemies.

Ophiuchus: A number of things are wrong and a number of things are not but right now you only need to worry about one. 

Sagittarius: Anything and everything is art. This, however, does not mean that it is good art.

Capricorn: Shave your head to reveal the map tattooed into your scalp that reveals the location where you will meet your soul mate.

Aquarius: Samurai are not a thing anymore but I admire your enthusiasm.

Pisces: Booby trapping your house like in home alone is really only acceptable in certain situations. You really should have paid rent this month, but your already here so make your last stand a valiant one.

Mars Signs (Sex, Anger)

Aries- Anger is quick to rise and often things are taken extremely personally. Sex is often passionate and straight to the point with them.

Taurus- Mild mannered until they feel they are being pushed into something that makes them uncomfortable. Then all bets are off. In sex they like to cater to all senses and take their to time enjoy it.

Gemini- Carefree, sensitive, or irritable depending on the day. Likes to try new things and talk a lott in the bedroom.

Cancer- Emotional and sensitive, and very protective of their feelings. Likes to cuddle and very touchy feely when it comes to sex.

Leo- You will know when a Leo mars is mad. Loves to dominate, whether in anger or in sex. Likes to show off in the bedroom because they usually can.

Virgo- Calculated and doesn’t necessarily voice themselves when mad but when they do will criticize every fault they notice about you. The little things count with them in sex and love foreplay.

Libra- Willing to compromise even when pissed but they are capable of an objectivity that shows no mercy when they’ve been pushed too many times. Will do anything to please partner in bed.

Scorpio- Yikes. When they are mad they feel it with every fiber of their being and will do anything in their power to make whoever made them mad feel it too. Loooves sex and are capable of unmatchable passion.

Sagittarius- Quick to get mad and/or take offense on anyone’s comments. Just as quick as they get mad they let it go though. Loves to try new things in bed like Gemini but less talking, more curiosity.

Capricorn- Very dignified, will try not to stoop to enemy’s level. If they choose to, will react in a more calculated than impulsive way. They are direct and simple in bed and fascinated with connection. They take sex seriously.

Aquarius- Really hard to know where and when an Aqua will pop off. More than likely they will only get mad when their opinion isn’t respected, WILL relentlessly argue. Sex is always very interesting and unique with these people.

Pisces- Will play the victim when it’s most convenient, can feel like their feelings are always the most hurt. Can play any part the partner wants in bed and is very passionate.

Leo (@leo_jungtw):

퇴근길 인사후에 그대들 뛰어가고 서둘러 귀가하는 모습이 미안하고 안쓰럽고 고맙고…  밝은 곳으로 다니시고 뛰지말고 조심히 들어가!    늘 고맙고 감사해.

After greeting you when I leave, seeing you run and hurrying to go home makes me feel apologetic and sorry for you and thankful… Stay in lit places and go home safely without running! I’m always grateful and thankful.