gif:zeus

creativeseraph asked:

Okie dokie!I can start: Chio wrapped the blanket around herself and snuggled closer to her boyfriends side.

Zeus was warm and snug by his girlfriends side, which was odd because her disaster was so cold but there was no place he would rather be. When Chio got closer to him, he began to pet her head noticing how soft her hair was. 

3

Why is it so difficult for Zeus to get laid?

Mind you, Odin also forced himself on the Jotun woman Rind, but he was punished for it by the other gods and banished from Valhalla, and got replaced with the god Uller. Odin suffered terribly both physically and mentally, until 10 years later the other gods decided he could come back. He never tried something like that again.
He did however have plenty of consensual sex, and it even happened a few times that he wasn’t really in the mood, but had sex with women anyway because they had heard how good he was in bed. Also, he slept with a ton of men as a woman himself and had plenty of human/god babies that way. Odin was busy.

  • Zeus:Read the charges.
  • Athena:Prometheus, you stand before this council accused of illegal genetic experimentation!
  • Zeus:How do you plead?
  • Prometheus:Not guilty! My experiments are only theoretical, and completely within legal boundaries.
  • Zeus:We believe you actually… created something.
  • Prometheus:Created something? Hah! But that would be irresponsible and unethical. I would never, ever...
  • [A human is revealed]
  • Prometheus:... make.. more than one.

I like the modern interpretations of the gods, I really do.

But.

Can I have something else rather than Zeus in a business suit being a slut with his PA/secretaries?

Can I have Zeus the Thundering as the leader of a biker gang, on a growling Harley Davidson with lightning bolts painted on the tank?

Perhaps he runs a homeless shelter and dons an apron to help in the kitchen when they’re short staffed. Encouraging the olds vets and everyone else to share their stories with him while they eat.

Can I have Judge Zeus who’s always fair and doesn’t let the scum bags slip through the cracks. A Judge who thinks that women still have full reproductive rights with their own bodies.

Maybe he’s on his last tour with the Royal Marines and all the young’ens call him ‘Dad’, but he’s the first one to suggest strapping himself to the outside of an Apache helicopter to rescue a wounded comrade on enemy territory?

  • Zeus:Poseidon, why are you all wet?
  • Poseidon:It’s a sandwich day. Every Thursday I take Pudge the fish a peanut butter sandwich…
  • Zeus:"Pudge” is a fish?
  • Poseidon:…and today we were out of peanut butter. So I asked Hera what to give him, and she said a ‘tuna sandwich’. I can’t give Pudge tuna!
  • Poseidon (whisper):Do you know what tuna is?
  • Zeus:Fish?
  • Poseidon (hysterical):It’s fish! If I gave Pudge tuna, I’d be an abomination!
  • Zeus:Poseidon, Poseidon, why is this so important?
  • Poseidon:Pudge controls the weather.
  • Zeus:...actually, we do.