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5

NOVELS FOR DECEMBER. GET OUT THERE AND READ. 

Oh, and just to clarify, comic books are reading, especially with the mature themes and intricate storytelling in them today. If you don’t believe me, just ask Neil Gaiman, Alan Moore, and James O'Barr. 

  • ALOHA FROM HELL by Richard Kadrey - This the first book I read by Kadrey. I found it in a tiny bookstore in the mall and realized it was in fact #3 in the Sandman Slim series. I didn’t care. I picked it up, read it and pretty soon I was backtracking to delve into the previous two entries. 
  • PAX OMEGA by Al Ewing - Easily the second strangest book I’ve read this month with a weird blend of alternative history, strange superhero pastiches and some brutal action. Strangely compelling. 
  • PENNY DREADFUL by Will Christopher Baer - The strangest book I’ve EVER read (and I read Kiss Me, Judas, the previous book to this one). Baer’s set up a hyper noir atmosphere in downtown Denver, which is as weird as it is impossible to look away from.
  • FOR TOMORROW - Brian Azzarello, Scott Williams and Jim Lee set up a great graphic novel. I love Superman–have since I was a kid. I may be a bit partial. But reading is reading and graphic novels are a great medium to relax from hardcore literature. 
  • BUTCHER BIRD by Richard Kadrey - Yes, I put Kadrey on here twice. It’s my list. I do what I want. Trust me, this novel will make the hairs stand up on your neck. You’ll never look at San Francisco the same way again. 
the fic i read last night had me literally screaming with laughter

NO EXAGGERATION

9 Insane Conversations with Sherlock Holmes

“Sherlock is conducting a vulgarity experiment. Everyone gets to suffer for science, especially John.”


Sherlock stared at her chest for a moment.

“Do you know why heterosexual men find cleavage so compelling?” Sherlock asked her.

John looked on, listening, helpless.

Molly chuckled and stroked her hair back. “Isn’t it something to do with nurturing? Reminds them of when they suckled as babies?”

“I suppose for some of them.” Sherlock looked back into the microscope. “For me, it’s because I love titty-fucking.”

John dropped his pen.

Molly stood stock still, looking at first stunned, and then baffled. After a moment she tentatively asked, “What?”

“Yes,” Sherlock said. “There’s nothing more delicious than oiling up a woman’s tits, squeezing them together in a nice slick valley, and thrusting my prick between them. It’s quite nearly magical.”

DFSDFDGfs sdg sdg sd gdg sdg

Sherlock put the book on his lap and gazed toward the windows.

“You know what I’m most interested in right now?” Sherlock asked.

John braced himself.

“What’s that?” Mycroft asked, clearly not caring about the answer.

“Wanking.”

John made sure the cup wasn’t anywhere near his mouth. He looked over and became deeply absorbed in the brickwork of the fireplace.

“I did it twelve times last week,” Sherlock said. “I tried it at different times of day. I discovered in the morning I produce the most semen. I tried it with lubricant and without. I tried it both kneeling and lying down. I came to the conclusion, given all the data collected, I prefer masturbation first thing in the morning, kneeling, with lubricant. And with two fingers stuffed up my arse.”

John tentatively looked back around and found Sherlock still staring toward the windows. Mycroft was staring at Sherlock, teacup lifted and poised in front of him.

I CVANTB BREATH ITS STIL HIARLIOUS

YNGHGMGDFGS

Fic Rec! All fics by pennydreadful

http://archiveofourown.org/users/pennydreadful/pseuds/pennydreadful/works?fandom_id=133185

I don’t usually read smut. It’s not really my thing, you see. Despite that…I still enjoy the works by pennydreadful (granted, I haven’t read them all), a well-known fandom smut writer. To get someone who isn’t really interested in smut to really enjoy it…well that says a lot, I think.

“He wasn’t shot execution-style. He was shot through the top of the head while performing oral sex.”

John gaped. “That's—ghastly.”

“He must have been terrible,” Sherlock muttered.

“What?”

“I said it’s terrible. We need to find the woman he was orally pleasuring. We find her, and we infiltrate the ring, start getting some answers.”

SHERLOCK THO

youtube

In advance of our May 11th premiere, here’s a brand new behind-the-scenes trailer for our highly anticipated drama series Penny Dreadful! The new trailer which will air this Sunday, during the season finales of SHAMELESS (9 p.m.) and HOUSE OF LIES (10 p.m.), features interviews with series creator and three-time Oscar nominee John Logan, executive producer Sam Mendes and series’ stars including Josh Harnett, Timothy Dalton and Eva Green. Enjoy!

Title: 9 Insane Conversations with Sherlock Holmes

Author: pennydreadful

Word Count: 5237

Rating: M

Summary: Sherlock is conducting a vulgarity experiment. Everyone gets to suffer for science, especially John.

“I want to see if most people prefer a vulgar, uncouth person to a relatively ‘nice’ one, despite posturing to the contrary. I want to see if brashness can work just as well as charm.”
“You’ve already conducted this experiment. It’s called your life.”

This is absolutely filthy and completely hilarious.

Author of the week: pennydreadful

Pennydreadful writes some of the most endearing smut in the fandom. Her work is mostly wonderful filthiness, though she also manages to capture an lovely, in-character, affectionate relationship between Sherlock and John. If you’re looking for funny, hot established-relationship sexytimes, definitely check out pennydreadful’s stuff.

Four great fics:

Sink Like a Stone–“After defeating Moriarty at the pool, life isn’t quite the same around 221B Baker Street…it’s more peaceful. And stranger.” Actually, this fic is smut-free, but it’s really amazing.

De Facto–“John thinks he has a normal sex life with Sherlock until of course he doesn’t. If Sherlock can invent his own job, he can invent his own fetish.”

One, Two, Three–“John reflects on a relationship. And this time, he tortures the walls.”

On the Bottom–“John tops from the bottom and Sherlock is an awkward hot mess, as usual.”

Find pennydreadful here: AO3