gif:ly

ooo i have an abusive ex who was really kinky too. (why is it the “friendzones” are always so kinky??)

we met online when i was in 8th grade and he was a junior in high school. again, abusive ex. very manipulative. anyway were just friends for years even though my parents said no. he said “friendship has no age!!” and me being fucking 13 thought i was special.

in my sophomore year of hs he asked for “pics.” i had a huge crush on him (since he isolated me from everyone and i developed stockholm syndrome!!!) so i did it. i was 15. a week later i think he, 19 years old, realized he had child porn on his computer and was jacking off to it. he told me out of the blue one day he trashed everything and didnt want to do any of that ever again, and also he hates me. we fought (because i didnt realize how fucky this all was) and didnt speak til junior year.

junior year of hs our friendship rekindled. of course it happened so nicely as a result of him asking for “pics” and me naively agreeing to send them. and then he started opening up to me sexually.

again, really into fucking little girls. i guess that’s why he took a liking to me. and at some point he convinced me to draw porn of the little sister in Oreimo. i said “what the hell im not drawing child porn.” he got mad at me of course and went into this big thing about how ITS LOLIS NOT KIDS THEYRE LOLIS THEYRE NOT REAL KIDS IT DOESNT MATTER. AND YOURE HURTING MY FEELINGS AND IM NOT A PEDOPHILE!! HOW DARE YOU SUGGEST THAT. so i drew the picture and he critiqued it as i went. “make the boobs perkier” on the 10 year old naked girl, he said..

BUT the biggest red flag: there was one time on skype he wore my panties (which i mailed him so he “could jack off on them”) and he revealed to me that he was in to crossdressing. a few months later i brought that up while talking dirty on skype, and he denied it ever happening– i didnt have that fetish! youre making things up! he goes, “what the fuck [my name] are YOU into that???”

i say “no dude what the hell YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE INTO IT YOU WORE THOSE PANTIES”

and then he fucking goes “IF YOURE INTO IT SO MUCH THEN FINE I WILL”

and he proceeds to undress and put on my panties. for the second time.

so two things: denying reality, which REALLY FUCKS YOU UP. honestly i started doubting him abusing me– maybe i was just “hallucinating” again?

second, what the hell? if youre gonna have a fetish at least wear my victoria secrets with pride. (never got those or MY ukulele back btw)

amongst other things, he also wanted to piss all over me, tie me up and tickle me until i pissed myself, make pancakes naked for him and i (but cook his cum into MY pancakes… bitch id switch them. fuck outta here), ask me to call him daddy. i wanted to break it off a million times and oh i tried. it ended in scolding and HOW DARE YOUS and “you are so selfish” talks. it’s hard dating and leaving a truly evil manipulative Nice Guy.

Did i mention i was in high school did varsity swim had a parttime job in NC, which is 3 hrs ahead of CA, and this fucking piece of shit had no job, went to community college PARTTIME, was 22 and made me stay up late until HE got tired?

i broke up with him last august before college (he convinced me to go to a college 30 min from his house in CA; it worked out actually im doing really well) and he broke into all of my accounts and changed all my passwords and i, 2 weeks from turning 18, had to go to the police because he wouldnt stop calling me and texting me saying he hopes I’d die and listing all the gruesome ways I should die

but then The Amazing Perfect Cops of America told me i was “only getting myself in trouble” for (GOD THIS FIRES ME UP) “choosing to be in THIS KIND of a relationship with an ADULT.” i wasnt allowed a restraining order. they reported it as “annoying calls” (GOD I FUCKING HATE THE POLICE) and told me to “leave the adult stuff to the adults” and told me “now young lady if you get sad and decide you wanna take all this back dont call us.”

FUCKING “DONT CALL US”

LET ME PROTECT MYSELF???? WHAT THE FUCK AMERICA

TLDR: never give nudes ever no matter what, NEVER TRUST “NICE GUYS” EVER NO MATTER WHAT, and i have an awesome boyfriend now who never makes me do anything i dont want to do ;_;

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA