1. WRIST - The sight of blood unsettled you too much so you burned your skin instead. Remember how you’d lock the door and wait until your parents left? Remember how your entire body shook, a body of a frail little girl, as you torched yourself numb? There’s a reason why your first mistakes never left a mark. Your wrists are made of steel. It’s okay, your hands have learned to stop shaking now.
2. PILLS - The pain ate you up so you ate it back by swallowing pills in the hopes the ground would swallow you whole. Tried to fool yourself into thinking pain killers could kill the pain humming in your brain, clawing off the tissues in your internal organs. They won’t cure you, darling. They won’t cure you. You’re only making it worse.
3. HIS SMELL - An entire year was wasted breaking yourself because he broke you. You are a jigsaw puzzle. You’ve got to destroy yourself first before you can see the big picture, before you realize how beautiful you really are, before you understand who you are and what you can become. Wasn’t it worth it? Wasn’t it worth it, though? I think it was time well-spent.
4. WEED - Getting high is such a high and you’d sworn since you were eight you’d never do drugs, but it’s too late. How many words have you not written because you were too high to hold a pen? How many memories have been forever erased by the fog that suffocates your brain cells? The strobe lights are mesmerizing, but they will not last.
5. CIGARETTES - You’re trying to convince yourself you’re not addicted, but you spit blood every time you wake up, and we all know your lungs are as black and decayed as your soul ought to look like. If it keeps you to breathe, then keep breathing. We all need something to hold onto.
6. WINE - You couldn’t get drunk on the taste of someone’s lips, so you got drunk by yourself instead. An alcoholic writer. What a cliché. There are no poems or beautiful words to be found at the bottom of that empty bottle.
1. Accept that you are sad. Do not ignore your emotions – feel them. Realize you are lonely and scared and that’s okay. There is nothing wrong with emotions; there is nothing to be afraid of.
2. Your mantra will be they are gone, they are gone, they are gone. Do not look for them to come back – they never will. They are gone. I’m sorry.
3. Remember that there are 7 billion people on this world – that means 6,999,999,999 of them are not lost to you.
4. Remember that there are 7 billion people on this world – that means 6,999,999,999 of them are not you. You are incredible and unique and whole, all by yourself. You do not need anyone to be complete.
5. Burn their old pictures and throw out their t-shirts; feel your grip loosen. You are letting go, now. Embrace it.