aight. the new heathers show is fucking shit. so what am i going to do about it? i’ll make my own damn modern heathers reboot. it’ll be GOOD and TRUE TO THE STORY and will have ACTUAL GOOD REPRESENTATION, as in, the heathers will still be skinny straight popular bitches (mac might be closeted bi idk but still, also she’ll have depression obviously), veronica will be puerto rican and bi and slightly chubby, jd will be at least part native american and demi and will almost definitely have self harm issues, martha will still be overweight and will probably use age regression to cope with being bullied (then gets bullied for acting childish, it’s a vicious cycle), betty will be indian and lesbian, there’ll definitely be another lesbian girl who likes heather chandler, confesses, and is not only turned down but tormented. she might actually be the first suicide, making it more credible to the school that heather chandler killed herself as they’ll think she felt bad for tormenting that girl until she killed herself. and of course it’ll all be modern but still have some 80s vibes. idk this is just a bunch of rambling but would anyone be interested in this? any suggestions? obviously nothing could ever compare to the original but i kind of like this idea, what do you guys think?
Listen, there are two main reasons I already hate the new heathers tv reboot:
1) the heathers, who are the antogonistic, privileged bullies, have been made into minorities (an overweight girl, a woc and a gender fluid person.) They made the bullies. People that are bullied the most. As if that’s some sort of edgy and original power move.
2) they are then killed/ fucked over,,,By two straight, white, cis, skinny people that are the heroes of the story.
What the fuck kinda message are they tryna get across?
Written over the course of 8 hours by a fifteen year old who doesn’t know anything about movie making.
Right so, I know absolutely nothing about anything, so this is totally open to criticism. Also, I haven’t watched Heathers in a LONG time, so this might not…work in all places. Anyway, here’s modern!Heathers, featuring lesbian!Veronica.
Veronica has recently had to switch schools after someone read her diary and decided to out her to the less-than-accepting general public. Her parents are way more accepting, but her new school, Westerburg, isn’t. So, to protect herself from gaining newer bullies, she leeches herself to the cardboard-cutout “perfect girls”, the Heathers.
Heather Chandler is seen as the girls’ ringleader; she’s undeniably the most attractive, the richest, the coolest, the person everyone wants to be. Heather Duke is like her second-in-command, but, behind Heather Chandler’s back, all she wants is to watch her downfall. Heather McNamara is Heather Chandler’s best friend from from elementary school; she’s a clear try-hard at being a “mean girl”, because she knows the only reason the other Heathers keep her around is because Mrs. Chandler likes her.
So, the Heathers, mostly Chandler and Duke, enjoy abusing their power over Veronica and the rest of the school, because, well, they find it kinda fun. They know that nobody can touch them.
One day, Veronica gets fed up with the Heathers, who are making fun of Marty, a transboy, by deadnaming and misgendering him. She ends up striking up a conversation with JD, another lesbian in a black coat. Veronica feels like she is the first person to actually understand her, and JD asks her out for coffee. And as time goes on, the two begin dating.
Heather Chandler, however, is less than impressed by Veronica having a girlfriend. In an attempt to “improve” Veronica, she gives her a makeover and throws a party to “show her off”. Halfway through the night, Veronica, intimidated by some boys who keep pushing themselves at her, undoes the makeover in the bathroom and tries to sneak out. Heather finds her climbing out the window and the two get into a fight. In anger, Heather calls her a dyke and Veronica runs away, crying.
Veronica ends up spending the night at JD’s house. JD keeps bringing up revenge plans, most of which end in Heather Chandler dying. Veronica interprets all of them as jokes and falls asleep in JD’s bed.
The next morning, she wakes up and finds JD pouring poison into a coffee cup and saying they should give it to Heather. Becoming slightly worried that JD is serious, Veronica suggests that they get her a cup of coffee and spit in it instead. JD agrees, but switches the cups behind Veronica’s back and takes the poison with them to Heather’s house.
At the Chandler’s place, Veronica fakes an apology to Heather and gives her the cup. Heather drinks it, and promptly dies. Veronica panics, horrified that she just killed her, while JD plays innocent and claims that she accidently mixed up the cups. JD helps Veronica write a fake suicide note and then goes to Mrs. Chandler, lying about how they had found her daughter dead on the floor.
At the funeral, JD tries to cheer Veronica up by telling her that, while it was okay for her to be upset, Heather kinda deserved what she got. Veronica tries to agree, but still feels horrible for what she did.
Westerburg institutes a anti-suicide program to help the students deal with her death, but the people running it are too uninformed to actually help the students at all. Heather Duke ends up using the other students’ grief to gain more popularity and, now that Heather Chandler is gone, pushes Heather Mac away. Duke drags Veronica around like a puppet, because she was the person who found Heather, to tell the story to everyone who asks.
Veronica, haunted by guilt over Chandler, becomes more and more dependent on JD. She ignores JD’s lack of grief, or any emotion at all, and how manipulative she’s becoming, because she still thinks JD’s the only person who wants her around.
Meanwhile, Heather Mac feels really guilty about her friend’s death, thinking that she may have killed herself because of a silly fight they had earlier that day. As she self reflects, she realizes that she has been a shitty person to almost everyone. Wanting to make up for it, she signs up for the school Key Club and works up the courage to call Veronica and apologize.
Against JD’s wishes, Veronica forgives her and they start becoming friends. She also starts to realize that Heather Duke is using her, and slowly begins pushing her away.
JD, jealous of the fact that Veronica hangs around Heather Mac so much, decides to get revenge on her by killing her step brother, Kurt. When she tries to get close to Kurt’s best friend and secret boyfriend, Ram, to find the best way to kill Kurt, he actually spills that Heather recently discovered that she was bi and she had a crush on Veronica. In spite, JD resolves to kill Ram as well.
JD tells Veronica that she plans on pranking Kurt and Ram after football practice by shooting them with what she calls pellet bullets, which she claims are harmless. Veronica agrees.
After shooting Kurt and Ram in the woods, JD makes Veronica go back to the car, claiming that she had a second part to the prank that only she was able to do. When Veronica leaves, JD leaves a fake suicide note and the guns next to the bodies.
Upon learning that she killed them the next day, Veronica freaks out and runs to JD, who claims the deaths were like Chandler’s, accidental, but well deserved. She doesn’t quite believe her, but she chooses to pretend to, so that JD would stick around with her.
Worried about how Heather Mac was putting up with with Kurt’s death, Veronica goes off to find her. She finds her in the bathroom, sobbing and debating swallowing a bottle of pills and saying that Heather Duke told her go die. Veronica manages to talk her out of it and tells her to ditch school to recover a little. Heather convinces Veronica to ditch with her and the two leave.
Heather and Veronica end up talking about what was going on, and Heather tells her that she’s bi and Veronica confesses that she doesn’t trust JD, but is too scared to leave her.
As time goes on, Veronica tries to distance herself from JD, beginning to realize that she is being used. She and Heather grow closer, and Veronica finds herself falling for her. JD grows jealous again, and hatches another revenge plan.
One night, while Veronica and Heather are hanging out, they find Marty sitting on the edge of a bridge. They talk to him, and he tells them that Heather Duke told him to jump off it, but he was too scared to do it. They comfort him and he tells them that he was gonna die anyway, because he heard that JD was going to blow up the school.
Veronica goes to find JD to try to talk her out of it, while Heather takes Marty home to his mom. When Veronica gets to JD’s house, she finds her parents there, talking to JD’s dad. Her parents tell her that JD was worried that she was going to try to kill herself, so she called them over. Veronica ignores them and finds JD making a bomb in her room, but, before she can talk to her, her parents drag her home and take away her phone.
The next day, Veronica finds out there is an anti-suicide rally in the afternoon, and realizes that that’s when JD is probably gonna blow up the school. She tells Heather and Marty to find a teacher to help, and she runs off to find JD.
Veronica finds her in the basement, setting up the bomb on the boiler. When JD notices her, she threatens to shoot her if she tries to stop her. Meanwhile, Heather and Marty run around, trying to convince the teachers that JD plans to bomb everyone, but the teachers either ignore them or don’t believe them.
Veronica, still in the basement, tries to fight JD once she puts the gun she’s holding down. She ends grabbing the undiffused bomb and running, but accidently turns on the countdown in the process. JD chases after her, right into the parking lot. She tackles Veronica, wrestles it out of her hands, and shoves her away. Triumphant, she runs back toward the school. However, she was unaware of the fact that Veronica accidentally activated the bomb, and noticed that it was ticking too late.
Once it explodes, the rest of the school runs outside to see what was going on. Veronica, beat up beyond belief, runs inside, only to find Heather Duke playing the victim to everyone about the deaths. Veronica tells her off, exposing that she told Heather Mac and Marty to kill themselves and that she wasn’t sorry about Heather Chandler’s death. Then, she walks away, leaving her behind in the dust, to find her friends.
can we also take time out of our busy schedule of complaining about the gays-can-only-be-villains trope to also bitch about how far removed the dialogue and pacing of reboot is from the original??? “i just killed my best friend” “and your worst enemy” “same difference” to “we have school tomorrow” like wtf is that shit
RAM AND KURT WERE MADE FUN OF FOR KILLING EACH OTHER IN A GAY SUICIDE PACT. if the heather duke is genderqueer or whatever, how the hecky is the ignorance against them being gay gonna play out? Is it gonna be completely gone? And heathers break kids for being different. I get they wanted to be cool and diverse or whatever but mmmmm, not like this. This isnt me being nit picky, legit we can all agree this is bad. And this is so….just no. I’m sorry but athletes and tall white blonde girls are the popular ones no matter what. The only time a trans person has an opportunity to exist without bullying is if they’re stealth(or maybe that’s cause im in the south). Tell me, how is duke, as gender queer, gonna climb a social ladder and be at the top. Also, don’t you find it at least the tiniest bit problematic having the Heathers be minorities that get murdered by the two straight cis white kids. I am not a person to call out things like “oh really white people” but I mean, shit man, LGBT people are actually murdered and assaulted, and to have the two protagonists be like “oh yeppers lets kill”, I just don’t know man, seems wrong. I get that minorities can be villians but, this leaves a bad taste in my mouth. And holy fuck JD. King Edge Lord and its not even ironic. “Lets snort Adderall, make out, and kill heather chandler,” its so dumb. Its like that one kid who tries too hard to be cool. Or those anti sjws that try too hard to be edgy, its just god awful. If you want diversity there are many other ways to do it. Or just create your own concept and do that. Heathers was a pull, an ironic little jab at cliques at school, JD, edgy and just in all, that whole character trope. This new Heathers is a mess, I was against it when the information was released back in August, and I’m even more against it upon seeing the trailer now. Don’t support it. Not cause you’re a picky fan, or an overreacting little snowflake, none of that, it has bad writing, and just in all, a bad look. I’m sorry but we can all agree mostly on that.
jesus christ can y'all stop hating on the heathers tv show? You haven’t even watched it and you still have the nerve to judge it??Y'all are just like the Sherlock fandom when they tried to keep elementary from coming out bc they thought their owo little baby binklecracker commonsnitch would always be the best. If you don’t want to watch it, then just don’t. It might turn out to be awful, but you can’t know that yet. Sit down and give it a chance.
EDIT: LMAAAAOOO nvm this show vilifies minorities and the lgbt community. I take back every word in this post. throw this show away.
Howbcome you don't like the Heathers musical as much anymore? Why do you like movie better? (Sorry if this sounded mean, I didn't mean for it to!)
reasons why i love the movie:
1. the tone is violent and satirical, and isn’t afraid to expose the darkest of humanity. it’s a level of fucked-up that’s very compelling
2. veronica’s character is fantastic. she’s not afraid to call out bullshit, but she’s also pretentious and rude sometimes. she dumps jd immediately after she realizes that he’s homicidal and spends the entire climax seeking justice. she literally sees him sacrifice himself and lights a cigarette from his explosion. when will your fave EVER
3. i have a crush on young winona ryder and christian slater. listen i’m a bi with needs
reasons why i have problems with the musical:
1. the musical format is intended for a very melodramatic, heart-wrenching story. that involves changing a disturbing scene with sexual assault in the background into a fun and goofy song about two horny but harmless dudes. it involves veronica practically begging jd to not die while he sings a somber reprise of their love song. the musical ending has to swell into a hopeful, all out chorus, instead of keeping it small and intimate and focusing on veronica and martha only.
2. that pretty much sums up my main issue. it focuses too much on tragic romance and too little on going all out with disturbing stuff. it’s mainly a problem with execution, not concept.
i love the songs and little jokes, but overall it encouraged more sympathy for jd, which is a bad move considering he’s supposed to symbolize the typical young white male dude with a justice complex. i still like the musical. just not as much as i used to