Okay, I almost never make personal posts on any type of social media I’m on where people who I don’t know can see and reply to my comments, purely because I am deathly afraid of confrontation and everyone seems to be out for blood these days. But this abs craze has always rubbed me up the wrong way and now it’s gone far enough, for me anyway.
Cases of idols like Baekhyuns is the sole reason, in my own opinion, why “oppa where are your abs?” “Oppa show us your abs!” “Real men work out and have nice bodies.” “Oppa do you work out?” “Oppa reveal your abs stop hiding them!” And “Unnie your thighs are too big.” “Unnie do you diet?” “Unnie you lost weight good job!” And all the rest of it, is so toxic to both men and women in the performance industry.
People seem to have this idea that because an idol can stand on a stage, it must mean they have the highest confidence levels ever which is a very wrong thing to think.
For me, again personally, I dont particuarily find abs and muscels attractive in men and women, I like squishy soft tummies and features but I still support people who are ripped, that is my own preference. But one thing I dont like more than a human thats ripped to death, is a human thats been forced/pressured or made to feel like they need to be ripped to death. Same for people who drop weight quicker than they’re gaining it.
If Byun Baekhyun has 100% made the decision to have abs HIMSELF, then as long as he is eating good meals and taking good care of himself, I will be 100% supportive of him always. But that being said, given his usual diet, his perfect appetite, his body type, his personal habits, and his own thoughts on working out, I really dont think he has. In fact he even said that he only got them for the end of the show; that they wouldnt be around for long; that he worked extra hard just to get them for Exo-ls.
The struggle he must have went through just to get his abs makes my heart hurt. He is someone with a good appetite, he likes to eat and knowing hes chewing food and spitting it out for his diet is sad. Hes not an active person, he likes to sit around and game, the most exercise he gets is on stage and given how full on their shows are, thats more than enough for a person to stay healthy. He has said MULTIPLE times that loosing weight, dieting and having a great body is not the most important thing in the world. He has been saying this for years. Hes a very sincere person, I dont think he’d portray dieting in such a negative way whilst actively working out and dieting on the side. His weight loss and muscle gain was sudden, which can only be achieved by intense dieting and working out. This was also the case for Xiumin. I wasnt around in the Exo fandom at the time when Xiumin had his lovely chubby cheeks, but I was around for his ‘big reveal’ and I have seen enough of his previous self to know that was not totally done by his own decision. I have seen and heard many comments that were made about his weight in the past and it saddens me because there was nothing wrong with him. He was a good weight, he had a full face and arms and legs and he looked healthy and happy and his cheeks were the cutest. But thats not good enough for some people and he pushed himself into a routine that even had Lay concerned enough to comment about it.
Dieting and loosing weight is very different, for different body types. Some find it easy, some find it hard. For some people like Sehun and Chanyeol, keeping weight off is a bit easier, they’re tall and thin. But for some body types like Baeks and Xiumins, they gain weight easily or have a harder time loosing it, Baekhyun said this in the concert, that he gains weight easily. Key from Shinee also has this body type and has commented about how hard it is for him to loose weight. BTS’s Jimin also has a similar body type and hes looking more and more gaunt every day. People with this body type are meant to fill out; are meant to have chubby cheeks, big thighs, squishy tummies and chunky hips. And when they loose so much weight you can see a scarily big difference.
This is not me being angry at Baekhyun for 'loosing his nutella abs’ or getting mad at people for liking them. Im merely asking that people acknowledge the obvious struggle Baek has gone through to get the body he has. To understand that yes, he may really have just wanted to have abs and that it was his own personal goal which is perfectly okay, but for people to also realise that you dont have to know Baekhyun personally to know that probably isnt true and that theres a good chance he felt pushed into it by this toxic idea that runs rampent in the performance industry that idols are replaceable and that they must fall within a visual standard regardless of talent if they want to be truly appreciated and the only way to do this is to have abs or loose weight. Acknowledge the hard work he has put into getting to where he is now, but also support him and his decision if he no longer wants them and decides to stop working out and dieting.
And please do not push Kyungsoo or any other idol into the same boat Baek is in. Please do not push him because he is quite reserved and doesnt have the highest self confidence and forcing this pressure onto him, when he has shown multiple times that he is uncomfortable with the idea of 'ab revealing’, that it will certainly have a reverse affect on him and will probably push him further into himself. He may start to feel he isnt good enough to be on stage if he doenst have 'defined, perfect’ abs and the last thing I ever want to see is the nervous, full of stage fright guy he was. He a healthy looking penguin and thats all that matters. I dont want to see any comments asking where Kyungsoo’s abs are. You shouldnt push anyone into that type of struggle.
In short, pretty or handsome should never be more important than healthy and happy. A happy smile is better than a forced smile. Please let idols be happy and healthy. Support idols who 100% themselves decided to have wash-board abs and are happy and healthy, but also support squishy tummies and big thighs that touch and full faces and chubby cheeks and big butts and slim arms. Support naturally gangily limbs and thin, flat tummies and and knobbily knees and sticky-out elbows or hips and high cheek bones. Support pale skinned idols and dark skinned idols and clear skinned idols and idols with acne and idols who dont even look like idols. Just be nice, please?
Be nice to every idol and dont forget to remind them every day that they are human and thats all that matters.
Please dont get angry at me Im just a concerned potato ㅠ_ㅠ