chowder and dex

headcanon that nursey gets one of his poems published in some pretty prestigious paper or something and everyone gathers in the haus to read it and it’s just full of autumn metaphors and anger and longing for someone unattainable. it’s a really fantastic piece of poetry and everyone says so, dex even compliments it and says “wow, you must really like this person”

and you know as soon as nursey and dex leave holster kinda sits there blankly and is like “everyone knows that poem was about dex, right?” and everyone responds like “oh, yeah duh”

  • nursey, nudging dex at 3am:listen. achilles loved patroclus so much. he went to war because they killed his one love patroclus... dex... william... he was So Gay for patroclus
  • dex:nursey i only went to sleep three hours ago. also i never read the iliad in ap lit i just used sparknotes you dingdong
  • nursey, pulling out a copy of the iliad:in book 24, lines 4-8, he states that he LONGED FOR PATROCLUS' MANHOOD and
William J. Poindexter
  • hates that stupid hipster “thrift shopping” fad
  • can cook pretty much anything BUT he need to see a recipe and he will follow it to a T
    • gets so mad when bitty just eyeballs shit jfc Eric how do you KNOW that’s a cup of milk u just poured it right in
  • somehow manages to hoard all of the snapbacks that get left behind at kegsters
  • deep down that kid is such a softie omg like 
    • it shows itself as anger but that is just how he knows how to express himself ya boy is sensitive af
  • he loves his freckles
    • not in a poetic nursey-comparing-them-to-the-stars kind of way but like
    • they’re a part of him and his whole family has them so why not just accept it
  • such sensitive skin omg
    • he didn’t know how to rlly take care of it properly for a long time but then he met bitty and ransom and u bet ur ass he picked up a tub of coconut oil within the first month
    • now he practically glows
  • an endless supply of lifehacks
    • like he knows how to make speakers out of solo cups 
    • and a lighter out of a battery and a gum wrapper 
  • has the highest alcohol tolerance out of the entire smh 
    • like that boy has been drinking whiskey since he was a wee one 
    • he can take a shot of it with a straight face 
    • and it terrifies most of the other boys (who stick to light beer and sticky sweet tub juice) 
  • constant dark circles under his eyes 
    • when he does sleep, he is the deepest sleeper ever 
    • (trust me when u grow up in a house full of people you learn to sleep through pretty much everything) 
  • he can whittle 
    • he’s p good at it
  • he remembers the smallest details about people
    • “oh this is your cousin celeste? the one who went to prom with that football player before taking a gap year to backpack through Asia and is now applying to schools for biology?”
    • “how did your quiz in (some random required course) go?”
    • “I convinced the barista to make you a pumpkin spice latte even though they’re out of season bc I know you love them”
  • so. touchy.
    • like when him and nursey finally get their shit together and date
    • u just know dex will constantly have his arm over nurseys shoulders 
    • or slung around his waist when they’re walking 
    • his legs stretched across nurseys lap when they’re sitting on the couch 
    • his head on nurseys chest while they watch movies in bed
  • he’s the little spoon 

nursey: *into the mic* stupid
nursey: *trips*
dex: *rimshots*

(submitted by @bshittyknights)

a Scene
  •  so it’s a friday night after exams and smh is just. chillin
  • like they’re all hanging out in the haus on the Hazmat Couch™ (Bitty put a blanket over it first) and they’re just kinda piled on top of each other, watching brooklyn 99 and chatting
    • Bitty is on Ransom’s lap, Holster is on the floor with his head on Bitty’s lap (he’s too big he got kicked off)
    • Nursey is lying over everyone with, like, one leg behind Bitty’s back and his arm on lardo’s foot
    • his head is somewhere on Dex’s belly
    • Lardo is perched on top of the couch so she can look down at all of them
      • Dex is showing her memes
  • and then. Nursey just. passes the fuck out
  • it’s chill at first, he’s doing his Cool Sprawl™, there are arms and legs everywhere. he doesn’t snore or anything, people barely notice. he just kinda tilts his head back and starts sleeping
    • lardo snapchats him to Camilla with the caption ‘poor bab’
    • Dex memes a little quieter
  • he sleeps through like three whole episodes (the boy is Tired)
  • but then. oh boy. ooooohhh boy. man oh man. but then.
  • Holster says something to Ransom and Bitty that’s a little louder than they’ve been talking normally
    • probably he was chirping them for crying about brooklyn 99 tbh
  • Nursey wakes up
  • he does it super slowly. first his leg kinda twitches and then his shoulders tense up and then his eyes are fluttering open and he looks just kind of blurry and confused and angry. his jaw is set and his eyes are still droopy and there’s a wrinkle in his forehead
    • Dex has never witnessed him this out of it before
      • it’s fuckin adorable
      • he stops talking
  • the entire team looks over because lbr nothing shuts Dex up when he’s ranting about memes
  • Nursey blinks a few times, looks around slowly, and you can see on his face as he slowly realizes that he was, like, sleeping on Dex’s chest
  • he looks up at Dex, who’s looking down at him, and the wrinkle between his eyes smooths out, and he gives Dex this slow, unguarded grin and relaxes again
  • this is the moment the entirety of smh falls in love with Derek Malik Nurse
    • Lardo takes another picture because she Knows™ and is gonna need something to show at their wedding