giants nails


“No, not at all! That is so not true and you know it (Y/N) so don’t argue with that.” Shawn said quietly but firmly in my ear while walking with guards on both our sides. He had been on tour for almost half a year now and it was the first time he had me fly out to him. Since my arrival, we had ignored the little tension between us but suddenly in the heat of the moment everything came out and we had been arguing all morning.

He was supposed to do several interviews this morning, so we were heading out to the cars. He would get in his own car while I had another car, I told him I didn’t want to wait for him to be done and be bored so I was going shopping and sightseeing. Shawn was annoyed but it was mainly because he knew I was mad at him and I  wasn’t going to be around him all morning. “It is most definitely true Shawn! How can you actually try to justify it? It’s been a half-year since I saw you for longer than a weekend. Honestly.” I sighed and he just huffed back.“Then don’t go shopping? Stay and try to actually talk about this shit with me.” He snapped at me. We had suddenly arrived at the doors to the exit, so we stopped up but the guards didn’t open up the doors. The bodyguards outside had to open them when the crowd had stepped back a little and calmed down. 

“You haven’t even called your mom. So it’s not just me you’re doing this with obviously, you’re starting to lack.” I snapped back at him, he really wasn’t making his family feel important, and I hated it. “I am working 24/7 babe! What do you want me to do?” I rolled my eyes and looked at the uncomfortable guards around me. They had to witness this because Shawn didn’t care if we argued in front of them. Apparently, they see much worse. 

“Obviously not 24/7 since you have time to hit up clubs and all.” He sighed and didn’t even answer me but just gestured for the guards to hurry. The one closest to the doors signaled for the others to be ready and as soon as Shawn and I saw him opening the doors, Shawn grabbed my hand and pulled me closer to him. “You sound like my parents….” He mumbled and glared at me but continued to pull my body closer to his and under his protection. And gosh did I need that.

The crowd was big and the people in the crowd were making this horrible sound, yelling and screaming, but to my own ears, it sounded like a giant nail scratching down a blackboard. Horrible. Even though I had argued with him and most definitely made him angry at me, Shawn pulled me tightly into him and threw glares at the few reporters who tried to get closer to me. “Hold on baby girl.” He whispered just loud enough for my ears to catch it and it reassured me in all of the mess. “Nearly there.” Somehow someone managed to catch a hold of my arm and yank me backward a bit but I hadn’t even had the time to react before Shawn pulled me towards him again. “Do not touch here ever again. I mean it.”

His stare was enough to shut the reporter up and Shawn and the guards continued to guide us onwards towards the cars. I could see mine behind Shawn’s and I was about to follow the guards leading me to the car when suddenly I was grabbed tighter by the waist by Shawn and made to face his car. “Get in.” He ordered but softly and I therefore obliged. I would prefer not to sit alone after all that mess, I could never know if that reporter or others wouldn’t do it again. They liked to be handsy and personal. I got in the car and watched as Shawn got seated beside me. As soon at the doors were closed he turned all his attention towards me.

“Are you okay?” He looked precious with his big eyes staring me down in concern. I just nodded silently and gave him a weak smile. Obviously, he didn’t expect much more, because suddenly he had that tight angry frown on his face again. “Good, now where were we? Oh yeah! I so do not go to clubs that much..”

Amy and the Egos (pt. 3)...

{For the lovely anon who asked how the Egos would try to cheer up Amy! Sorry, it’s kinda long…}

Warning: Massive amounts of cuteness and some cuddles; viewer discretion is advised.

It’s nearly three in the afternoon and Amy still hasn’t gotten out of bed. Mark, Ethan, and Tyler are away on tour, and Kat has taken the time off from babysitting them to visit family. Normally Amy would go on a crazy adventure to see some place new and exciting, but today, she just… can’t.

After the fiasco at Mark’s place when she got sick, Amy decided it was time to give the Egos her number and address just in case they wanted to drop by and see her. The group message she set up with most of the Egos (Wilford would be in the group if he would quit shooting his phone every time it rang) is full of texts wondering where she is and why they haven’t heard from her in a few days.

Amy sends back a few cryptic texts about not feeling well and being swamped with work. Really, she just doesn’t want to worry them by telling them how she really feels… sad and lonely. The Host, however, can see Amy’s true meaning behind her messages and goes to Wilford. Will, in typical Warfstache fashion, decides that this calls for another field trip!

When Amy hears a knock on the door, she somehow immediately knows that its them. Still in her pj’s and bed hair, she opens the door and tries to give them a smile. None of them are buying it. Amy’s face immediately lights up, however, because they have not come empty-handed. The Host has homemade brownies (who knew that the blind guy is Ego Inc.’s best cook?), Bim has every season of Doctor Who and a couple bags of popcorn, Wilford brought “Mark Bop” for karaoke, and Google ordered every kind of beauty product he could think of.

Warfstache prances into the den, stands up on the coffee table, and proudly declares, “Good evening ladies and gentlemen and all other configurations of being! My name is Wilford Warfstache, and we are having an emergency slumber party!”

Google shakes his head at Wilford before dumping a giant bag of facemasks, nail polish, and makeup into Amy’s arms. “I conducted a search for how to attain the perfect ‘sleepover’ and believe that the formula requires: food, movies, makeovers, and companionship. Do you think this will suffice?” Amy didn’t even know the droid could look so eager to please. “We could even engage in the ‘gossip,’ if it would improve Miss Amy’s emotional health,” Google offers.

Amy shocks them all by dropping the bag onto the floor, bursting into tears, and dragging them all into a group hug. Bim immediately begins crying as well, Warfstache snuggles up into the middle of the hug, and the Host and Google try their best to provide the appropriate amount of physical comfort.

They stay up all night talking about work and laughing at each other’s jokes, and Amy does their makeup—which means every shade of pink imaginable for Wilford, blue lipstick for Google, and smokey eyes for Bim. The Host sweetly declines any makeup but lets Amy paint his nails a shade of gold to match his hair.

Wilford starts the infamous Tickle Fight of ’17 (minus his knife, thankfully), but Amy is forced to make both he and Google sign a treaty that states neither of them will ever engage in tickle warfare again after the death of one unfortunate ceramic lamp (may he rest in pieces).

Once the others are asleep—Wilford draped out in the floor in a nest of pillows and blankets, Google charging in the corner, and Bim snuggled into Amy’s side—she and the Host sit on the couch in the partial light of the TV. The Host clears his throat and whispers, “The Host… I mean, I wanted to ask you what made you so sad… You’re always so cheerful, so what made you want to stay here all alone?”

Amy is genuinely shocked. She’s never heard the Host speak in first person before. The Host anticipates her thoughts though and gives a sheepish smile. “I speak in third person when I feel the need to distance myself from a situation. It’s… easier that way, but,” he pauses for a moment, his face crinkling up in thought, “I trust you.”

Amy swallows the lump in her throat. “Well, sometimes when I’m all alone, I get very sad, but when I’m sad, I don’t want to fix it. I mean, I do want to feel better, but I don’t want to…,” her voice trails off in frustration.

The Host reaches over and awkwardly pats her hand before drawing back quickly. “Don’t worry, Amy. I understand. It is important, as Google says, for you to have companionship, and sometimes, when we are sad, we don’t always make the decisions that are best for us, correct?” Amy nods, and the Host smiles brighter. “And you are the Host’s… I mean, my best companion.”

Amy bites her lip and nods, feeling the tears bubbling up inside her again, but instead of crying, she tucks herself under the Host’s arm. The Host goes stiff for a moment, not used to the touch of another person, but he eventually relaxes when Amy whispers, “Thank you, Host. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you guys.”

The Host senses when Amy finally falls asleep and only then does he whisper back, “And I don’t know what I would do without you, Amy Nelson.”


You know what’s funny is I’ve been hearing so much about “Ghost” as a provocative video and I put out the same fucking video with me, and the lead was a male. If anything there was more sexual content. There’s like fucking nails scratching down backs and, like, orgasm faces and being thrown up on a desk by my thighs, and everyone was like “Oh what a great love story, this is like 90s love.” And then I put out a video where I’m making out with a girl and all of a sudden everyone is like “This is pornographic!” And it blows my mind that it can be considered more provocative or near pornographic because of that, which is lowkey why I made the fucking video. Female-female relationships are so often portrayed as pornographic in the media, we tickle fight and have fun, play games, are sad, and cuddle, and do a lot more than pretend to finger each other with giant acrylic nails. Which doesn’t happen in real life, by the way.


10 DIY PROJECTS YOU NEED TO TRY! Makeup Inspired Room Decor & Organization! Baby Lips,EOS & more DIYs




Day Three: Favorite Quote/Interview

“Female/Female relationships are so often portrayed as pornographic in the media. We tickle fight and have fun and play games and are sad and cuddle and do a whole lot more than pretend to finger each other with giant acrylic nails.”


(so uh…. I’ve got some headcannons of these guys I thought y'all might be interested in. There’s headcannons for the swap!au as well. I just call it Neighbor Hello or NH! for short. I did NOT come up with this au. I’ve seen different people post different variations of it but I don’t know who originally created it)


• He is a docile natured person. The demons possessing him cannot change this aspect of him, but if his house is under the threat of invasion, then they will ‘compel’ him to protect it at any cost.

• It’s very easy to hold a conversation with the Neighbor. He’ll talk about anything, really. Since he has no one to converse with normally, he will often times have conversations with his mannequins.

• He is very fond of crows. (obviously) There always seems to be one or two crows hanging around his house daily. These crows will sometimes attack the Protagonist or caw loudly when he gets too close to the Neighbor’s home.

• He loves kids. (Not in a perverted way, mind you) He loves interacting with them and is that kind of guy that’ll take lost children in the supermarket to the nearest employee and wait with them until their parents show up. He always manages to slink off just before their parents actually arrive.

• He’s a romantic at heart. 'He swept me off my feet’ kinda guy. His house is littered with romance novels.

• He’ll talk to his flowers pretty often, as well.

• He can’t stand fireworks. The loud noise and bright colors give him headaches.

• He hates looking at himself in the mirror. That’s why there are little to none in his house.


• He is rash and crude by heart. With a 'if it aint him, its me’ mentality. He thinks everyone is secretly out to get him. He also has a short temper and curses quite a bit. He sometimes genuinely tries to help others but, often times, his help is refused.

• He has constant nightmares, and sometimes night terrors, involving his Neighbor that fuel his desire to break into said Neighbor’s basement. They also fuel his fear of the Neighbor.

• He’ll sometimes past out from fatigue. He refuses to sleep because of his nightmares/terrors.

• He lives off of energy drinks and coffee. He literally goes days without sleep. He’ll have at least two cups of coffee in the morning and/or evening and a few energy drinks whenever he has to go back to his house. His bedroom is littered with empty cans.

• He has a slight form of tourette’s, resulting in some involuntary tics. These usually aren’t that noticeable unless he is under severe stress or fear. Which is quite often, considering he is constantly being hunted by the Neighbor…This has led to him being accused of using drugs before in the past. His haggard appearance doesn’t help, either….

• He is somewhat of a party animal. He has rich friends in the city that will invite him to their parties often. He usually doesn’t go because of his determination to break into the Neighbor’s house everyday. But, if he does decide to go, he’ll stay gone for over a week. Coming back home horribly hungover and looking like an utter mess. He usually doesn’t remember what transpired over the week.

• He doesn’t have many friends or family he’s actually close to. His only best friend’s name is Mike. He calls often Mike to tell him about his 'psychopath’ neighbor.

• He really isn’t an animal person. Literally every animal he comes across hates him.

NH! Neighbor:

• Many think that the NH! Neighbor still has the same docile nature as the original Neighbor. Or even, some form of anxiety similar to the original Protagonist.This is not the case. This version of the Neighbor has a particularly violent temper, with a very, very short fuse. Anything could set him off. Whether it be an obnoxious show on the television, to a particularly annoying neighbor knocking on his door. He is prone to throw dangerous fits when extremely angered.

• He’s a big hunting fanatic. He places mounted bears and other animals he’s killed in the same places where the original Neighbor put his mannequins. He also has mounted animal heads EVERYWHERE.

• He absolutely hates knives. He will avoid the kitchenware aisles in stores. He doesn’t keep any of them anywhere in his house. He doesn’t use them when he cooks. He won’t even look at them.

• He carries a giant wood-chopping axe with him everywhere. Even to places like the super market or the bank. It often frightens other people, but no one is brave enough to confront him on the matter.

• He’s very tall. Around 7'1 feet tall to be exact.

• He absolutely adores wolves. He used to have a well-trained pet wolf called 'Buddy.’ He passed away years ago. There’s a cross with Buddy’s name on it near the lake.

• His house suffers some serious damage from the fits he has sometimes.

• He loves orange juice. He has dozens of orange juice containers littering his home. He never uses glasses. Just drinks it right out of the container like the original Neighbor does with milk.

NH! Protagonist:

• He’s a very loyal friend. Often placing their needs over his own. He’s the kind of person that won’t tell others if he’s sick or unhappy. Often times, he tries to hide his sickness from those who care. He convinced himself that he can handle it on his own.

• His attitude and demeanor are quite strange for a guy his age. He has moments of courage, willing to tackle his loose cannon of a Neighbor head on, literally, and he has moments where he’ll hide in his house for two days after a particularly frightening scare from his Neighbor.

• He’s actually terrified of the Neighbor. Usually he’ll be fine if the Neighbor is chasing him, but if Neighbs catches him off-guard and gets too close, he’ll have a panic attack and cry. When this happens, the Neighbor will just leave the him there and walk away instead of throwing him out of his house. This is the only time he’ll show any sympathy towards the kid.

• He loves pushing his Neighbor’s buttons, since its so easy to set him off. If he’s not trying to break into the basement, then he’s just trying to aggravate the Neighbor.

• He has a metal bat with giant screws nailed into it. He won’t tell anyone where he got it or why he has it in the first place.

• He will never, ever sleep on a bed. He always uses his couch.

• He also has night terrors. Sometimes they’re about his Neighbor.

• He loves watching shows like 'South Park’ and 'Rick and Morty.’ He also loves to watch regular kid shows like 'Adventure Time.’

(Uhhhhh sorry if this is all over the place and inaccurate. This is just what I genuinely think of these guys. If anyone has any questions then feel free to ask! I’ll try to answer as best I can!)

(I’m gonna add their names and ages as well under this. They have the same names in the Neighbor Hello au.)

The Neighbor: Jessie Williams
Age: 42 years old

The Protagonist​: Ryan Johnston
Age: 21 years old

The NH! Neighbor: Ryan Johnston
Age: 36 years old

The NH! Protagonist: Jessie Williams
Age: 18 years old

Hey, I remember you! You’re that student I pulled away from the jaws of that giant nail clipper! 

Or was it the giant living piggy bank…? It was something giant, that’s for sure!

You were too scared to speak, you say? Well, you wouldn’t be the first - that’s a normal reaction to facing sudden doom! You can talk to me through this webpage if it makes you feel better! I’m not always here, but my sidekicks will save your messages until my next visit!

swiftlyromantic  asked:

If rhaegar and Lyanna had been betrothed and married normally, would they have made good rulers of the seven kingdoms?

*waves hands a bit confusedly and incoherently*  It’s very hard to tell with what we know about them. The fact that Rhaegar fucked up so very badly politically with Lyanna suggests he probably wouldn’t be the most spectacular king in general, prioritizing prophecy over politics.  (See also these posts.) Like Baelor the Blessed, except with magic rather than religion, which is also less likely to endear Rhaegar to the smallfolk. However, with a good and efficient Hand, even the most distracted king can serve fairly well. (Robert, for example, or again, Baelor.) So it would really depend on his Hand. Jon Arryn would be very good… Tywin would normally be good, although he would resent Lyanna’s presence over Cersei, and that would decrease his efficiency (as he might plot to backstab Lyanna and/or Rhaegar in favor of making Viserys king, married to Cersei of course). But without his Hand… um, I’m pretty critical of Rhaegar, sorry.

Lyanna as queen… well, she died when she was barely 16, so it’s extremely hard to judge her potential. Note her death was from complications of pregnancy, which doesn’t bode well in general (especially with Rhaegar’s need for three children), but mind you an isolated tower with probably only one wetnurse/midwife is an exceptional situation. Also the reason she was in that situation… it depends on how much of a romantic view you hold of R/L, but nevertheless it doesn’t show her character in the most perfect light, making her look either naive or a romantic fool or conniving. (I do not blame her in any way, btw, only Rhaegar, I don’t think she was conniving in the slightest, but yes she very probably was naive but she was 15 ffs.) And furthermore, her “wolf blood”, the mood swings and fierce anger some Starks are prone to, is not the most perfect personality for a queen consort, but hell if Cersei could do it for a dozen+ years, who can’t. (Ugh, that’s damning with faint praise, sigh.) Also, Lyanna being the Knight of the Laughing Tree is both good and bad for a queen – good because of her sense of justice and generous nature, bad because of her impetuousness and lack of political sense, not to mention Westeros hasn’t really looked well on queens who engage in “male” activities since Visenya. (I’m reminded more and more of Daena the Defiant, unfortunately.) On the other hand, I want to say screw Westeros misogyny and beliefs about gender roles; on the other other hand, it’s hard to define what a good queen consort is without using Westeros mores.

Plus, whatever wild history changes exist to allow Rhaegar and Lyanna to be “betrothed and married normally” (because please remember he was 21 when he married Elia, and Lyanna was 13, so she was never an option at the time), you also have to factor in Aerys (unless he’s dead, but that’ll get Rhaegar Cersei, not Lyanna), and that’s a whole other kettle of worms. Until Aerys dies, Lyanna would not be queen, only crown princess, and his presence is a giant claw-nailed specter over her. (He wanted the KotLT arrested for treason, remember.) Nothing bodes well here; Aerys is a ticking time bomb in any history where he lives. (That’s why the Southron Ambitions conspiracy happened to begin with, not to mention Robert’s Rebellion.) Even assuming Rhaegar successfully arranges a Great Council and forces Aerys to abdicate, that’s still a very difficult way to begin one’s rule.

But supposing that Rhaegar waits to marry until after Aerys is gone (he wouldn’t, because he didn’t, but we are supposing), and Lyanna as queen is part of a fresh new start… well… maybe. Maybe they’d be ok. They probably wouldn’t be bad. Better than many, I’m sure. But between Tywin’s disgruntlement, the remains of the Southron Ambitions alliance (even with Rickard Stark likely pulled out with Lyanna queen), Rhaegar’s focus on prophecy, and however Lyanna displays her exceptional nature, it’s definitely not going to be an easy rule, sorry.

yanablumka  asked:

Top 5 Shoma`s shirts!

god where do i begin, there is simply too much beauty to choose from!! i’m going to interpret this as costumes in general, not only shirts, because there are some wonderful onesies i simply can’t exclude.

1. what are those even supposed to be? giant nails? WHAT IS THAT PATTERN. WHY DOES THIS SHIRT EXIST

2. glittery butterfly over sheer fabric with fur on the collars because why not!!


4. this is…a lot. like. wow. this is a lot.

5. garbage green over shiny garbage bag pants; shoma just wants to tell the world that he is the #1 dai-stanning trash

i should make a photoset of all of shoma’s costumes one day because there are SO MANY MORE that must be shared. truly he is an icon of figure skating fashion. #shomasuglyshirtemporium


daily drawing #33, more Espen the Brave stuff.

In the lands far to the south, far past the Limit and beyond the old Goblin strongholds, tales are told of a strange kingdom; a kingdom peopled by the dead. Sometimes called the Quiet Legion, or simply the Impaled, they are rarely sighted more than a few hundred miles north of the south pole, and never in any great numbers. They appear diverse in size, gender and race - the giant black nails that pierce their bodies being their one unifying characteristic (as well as their eponymous silence).

Nothing substantial is known of their origin, but stories and folk-tales offer clues. Some religions see the south in general as a sort of afterlife or purgatory, where lost souls are sent to toil. Some see it as a nation of its own, and speak ominously of a “Quiet King”. In any case, the Impaled have never been hostile, and the Quiet Legion has never sought quarrel with any of its neighbors - so whatever forces govern the south, they seem content to be left alone.

No fantasy setting would be complete without some kind of ambiguous necromancy, and whilst I’m conscious of the surface influence of things like the White Walkers on these guys, once you get to know more about them I’m confident they’re very much their own thing. Also! I’m up to date with Steven Universe now and I like it a lottt. It touches on a lot of neat stuff thematically and aesthetically and it’s cool because there are some ideas in there that I feel are kind of similar to some of mine (although obviously infinitely better realised). It can be irksome when that happens but I think it’ll just force me to refine my ideas a bit more so they’re more distinctive. But man wow does that show have so many amazing artists!

Thinkin’ about kin stuff and I’m just so… simultaneously amused and horrified by how much I forgot about human society by the time of the new reign cinematic

If you’re thinking things to yourself that are along the lines of “What do the humans do? To reassure one another? That thing with their mouths? With– with, like, the corners of them? Didn’t I do that once? I’ll do that!!! [BIG GIANT SCARY GRIMACE] Nailed it!”, you have a Serious Problem