ghost pepper!

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Tuxedo Luis from one of my entries for Inktober 2016, I decided to change it a bit in the colored version. Combination of Lewis from mystery skulls and Tuxedo mask from Sailor moon.

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Mercer’s Magnificent Mane™ appreciation post

Requested by ~Anon~

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My contribution to the 2016 Frostiron Bang! :D

Vintage photograph-style - or at least my sad attempt at it. :P (Wish I’d had the time to draw a third picture, but alas… real life got in the way.)

Drawn for Ghosts in Amber by fullofleaves. :)

(Which is amazing, by the way, and exactly what I’d hoped for when I saw the words ‘Crimson Peak AU’ dance before me! *happy happy* Go read it too, and feast your tired eyes! :D)

Humans are Weird: Spices

Alien: Today in my “Human Studies” book, I’m reading about human foods.

Human: Ooh, cool.

Alien: But I’m not sure this is accurate. It says here that humans purposely ingest a plant high in a pain-causing chemical, capsaicin.

Human: Oh, peppers? Yeah. Spicy.

Alien: But why would you want to eat something that causes you pain?

Human: Some people like the burn. I think it causes the same sort of reaction as drinking alcohol…?

Alien: That activity doesn’t make sense to me either. Can we discuss it after?

Human: Sure.

Alien: So, these “peppers.” Do you enjoy eating them?

Human: Me? Well, not by themselves. But I do like somewhat spicy foods. My brother, though, he likes them much hotter. He’s eaten some really spicy peppers, even ate a ghost pepper by itself.

Alien: Ghost pepper.

Human: Yeah, it’s the spiciest natural pepper. His face got pretty red, and he got the hiccups.

Alien: That… doesn’t sound like a healthy reaction.

Human: It just means that it’s a really spicy pepper. I mean, if I ate one of those, it might kill me, but he was fine.

Alien. Why would it kill you?

Human: Too spicy. You have to have a tolerance for capsaicin or it can literally kill you. And the ghost pepper is so hot that to handle it, you gotta wear gloves.

Alien: Your planet has plants that can KILL people, and which you can’t handle directly, and your brother ATE ONE, by ITSELF??

Human: Yeah.

Alien: …

Human: He says that when he gets desensitized to ghost pepper, he wants a Carolina Reaper.

Alien: I’m almost afraid to ask.

Human: …

Alien: What’s a Carolina Reaper?

Human: A pepper scientifically engineered for spiciness. It’s currently the world’s hottest pepper.

Alien: *stares at human in disbelief*

Alien: *stares at human studies book*

Alien: *stares at human again*

Alien: *whispers to self* How… how are humans real?

Warhammer 40K Pizza AU
  • Space Marines: The equivalent of Pizza Hut: nothing truly outrageous, but a variety of flavors and combinations so that you can find your desired favorite.
  • Imperial Guard: Mass-produced but affordable while still being tasty. They have some specialties that most people don't order anymore but a few still like them.
  • Adepta Sororitas: Strictly orthodox cheese+sauce+crust and maybe a topping or two. Pineapple is considered heresy.
  • Deathwatch: Started off like the Space Marines but along the way someone gave them sriracha sauce, ghost peppers, pineapple, and exotic sausages. Now they're the place with odd combinations that somehow are really tasty.
  • Eldar: Super-artsy artisanal pizza with white sauce, olive oil drizzle, six kinds of goat cheese, and herbs baked into the crust.
  • Dark Eldar: Every sauce is actually maximum-strength sriracha. They do bizarre "acquired taste" specialties involving stuff like stuffed peppers and organ meats and ingredients that nobody knows how to pronounce.
  • Orks: Massive deep-dish monstrosities that are more like meat pies than pizza. Nobody complains though because the owners are boisterous and friendly and always give you tons of food.
  • Tau: You go in and order and they give you not one pizza but five mini-pizzas, each with a different topping. Eating each one individually tastes alright, but if you combine them they make really interesting and delicious gourmet combinations. The hipster pizza place.
  • Chaos: That one scuzzy-looking place that you're pretty sure is a front for something but the pizza is still good. Really likes their meats, and everything comes smothered in red pepper flakes. SAUCE FOR THE SAUCE GOD!
  • Necrons: The oldest building in town that stone-grinds its own flour, bakes everything in brick ovens, and ages its own cheese. Still somehow manages to crank out huge quantities, but they don't do specialty stuff.
  • Tyranids: Literally just sauce and a pile of toppings dumped on a crust, thrown in the oven, and devoured as messily as possible.