Oceans - Stuart Twombly

inspired by the song Oceans by Seafret
word count: 4614

The scene was picture perfect.  Bright smiles, twinkling eyes, the fairy lights hung around the outside of the cafe illuminating the dark night.  Every time I looked at the picture, I could feel my heart beating in my chest.  My friends, all sitting around this horrible metal table.  Arms loosely wrapped around each other, cheeks pressed together, peace signs, a typical picture of a bunch of goony young adults.

The rose gold frame sat on my desk, catching my eye every time I typed away on my laptop, or watched Netflix, or worked on a new project Google handed to me.  I’d look at it for a few moments, it was never just a glance.  It probably took a good chunk of my day actually.  I’d stare at it, eyes flickering to every little detail.  The whiteness of Neha’s teeth, Lyle’s glasses slipping slightly down the bridge of his nose, one of Billy’s eyes was half closed, my hair was messy, spilling over my shoulders from under Stuart’s beanie.  My gaze would linger there, and if I was feeling peculiarly nostalgic or depressed, I’d gently caress the glass protecting the photo with my fingers, then go back to my work like nothing had happened.  Oh the vicious cycle of depression.

Today was the day where I got up early, ready for whatever my job would bring me.  Some days were harder than others, but never usually too difficult.  Though every night I walked back into my apartment with heavy feet.  But that had nothing to do with the difficulty of work.  No that was just plain anxiety and stress.

See, it used to be incredible.  Working on the greatest team of delinquents, that had quickly become my closest friends.  Winning the intern competition last year was probably one of the greatest moments in my life, that I’d remember forever.  Us dorks felt like we were on top of the world.  We’d even gone out for celebratory pizza afterwards.  That’s when things started happening.  That’s when I grew closer to Stuart Twombly.

The irritating and sarcastic boy that couldn’t handle being away from his phone, had seemed to transform into a completely new person in a matter of forty five minutes.  I hadn’t spoken much with him, in fact we’d never even been alone together or held a solid conversation without the rest of the team being there.  So when he’d sat in the same booth with me, I was slightly confused.  Neha had quickly slid in across from me, which I silently thanked her for, seeing she was the closest person I had on the team.  Lyle was on the other side of Stuart, fitting three of us into one booth (which left absolutely no space between our legs) and Billy and Nick and Yo-Yo were squashed in with Neha.

The night was fun though, we’d ordered many pizzas, and stayed until closing.  We joked around, made fun of Gharam, and his relentless act towards asking me out. 

“I mean, how many times did he try?” Nick snickered.  I blushed and looked down at my lap. 

“Seriously, the creep should’ve left you alone after the sixtieth decline” Lyle said, an awkward laugh following.  “How about a date with a real man?” My eyes widened slightly as I tried to see of he was being serious or not.  I couldn’t really tell.

“Come on man, Gharam just started leaving her alone give her the space to breathe” Stuart spoke before I could say anything at all.  I looked up at him for a moment, just as everyone began laughing again.  But he somewhat ignored my glance, pretending to be interested in whatever Billy was saying.  When I realized he wasn’t going to look back at me, I turned away and picked at my meal.

We’d stayed for another few hours that night, until a waitress came over and told us that she couldn’t let us stay any longer.

Her eyes were bored, dull as she looked over our table.  I’d figured we’d annoyed her.  We weren’t exactly a quiet group.  But they landed on Stuart, to which she’d grinned mischievously, and her blue eyes lit up with what I could only describe as desire.  Though the look didn’t bother me, it did confuse me greatly.

“Alright, we’ll be on our way” Nick had said, and everyone began sliding out of the booths.  Stuart stood, and our waitress opened her mouth to speak, but he turned away from her, smiling softly towards me as I scooted out of the seat.  Stuart held his hand down to me, and it landed on the small of my back as I stood.  It stayed there as I walked with him to the front door of the restaurant.

Again, confusing me greatly.

But as soon as we were out of the view I looked wildly up to him, my eyes wide and brows furrowed with confusion and question.  But he shook his head, just barely, but enough for me to close my mouth before any questions could be asked.  The others had caught up to where we were waiting and we all left.

We walked up to the Golden Gate Bridge, as we’d done a few times before to go relax.  I’d been there countless times, (I lived in San Francisco) but every time I went it was still just as breathtaking.  The group of us laid down in the grass, enjoying the view of the night sky.

“Does anyone know any constellations?” Yo-Yo asked, a few feet away from me. 

“Yeah I do” I said, already searching the sky for familiar ones.  “There’s Orion” I said, pointing up to where I recognized his belt.  “That’s Delphinus, Taurus, Pavo” I looked for more, licking my lips as I tried to remember them all.  “I think.. Yeah thats Scorpius, and that’s-”

“How do you remember these all?” Stuart asked from right next to me.  I turned my head, meeting his whiskey brown eyes.  I blinked for a moment, then chewed on my lip.

“I uh… I minored in astrology for two years” I murmured.  I didn’t mean to be quiet, my voice just sorta failed me.  Stuart smiled at me, eyes flickering between mine and making my breathing shallow before he looked back up at the stars.  I continued to stare at him for a moment, how freckles scattered over his jaw, and long strands of chocolate brown hair poked out from under his beanie, slightly over his ear.  When I felt I’d stared for too long, I blushed and quickly looked away.

I think I was growing very fond of this Twombly boy.

When it became so late, the sun began to poke up, I was nudged.  Apparently that night I’d fallen asleep in the grass.  

My eyes fluttered open to see Stuart and Neha hovering over me.  I waved them off and closed my eyes again, turning on my side.

“Come on y/n” Stuart sighed, and a few seconds later I felt strong arms pull me up.  I yelped, jolting and opening my eyes quickly, only to hear his chuckle.  “You’re fine, just go to sleep” Again, I’d found myself confusedly staring at him.  But he didn’t see.  He was talking quietly with Billy and Nick.  This time I fell back asleep. 

When I woke up again, I was being shook gently.  I yawned, eyes landing on Stuart.

“Wha-where am I-”

“Calm own would you? Don’t you trust me?” I thought for a moment, opening and closing my lips.  That was when I registered I was sitting in a taxi cab, and my head had been laying on his shoulder, cushioned by his beanie.  Which still sat there.

“S-sorry did I fall asleep o-on you?” He chuckled and shrugged.

“Your fine.  This is your complex right?” He asked, pointing up at the building lot we just pulled into.  I nodded.  “Good, that’s what Neha told me” He said.  I straightened up, cracking my back as the driver parked.  Stuart opened the door, stepping out and holding his hand out to me.  My eyes locked on his for a long moment, before slipping my palm into his and letting him help me out of the car.

In fact, he’d walked me inside, and into the elevator to the third floor, down the hall to my room as I’d directed.  I stuffed my hand into my pocket, grabbing my key and unlocking the door.  When I stepped inside, I realized our hands were still conjoined.

“Would you like a drink?” I asked, not wanting to let go for an unknown reason.

“U-uhm sure” Stuart nodded, and I gestured my head for him to come inside.  I released his hand, kicking off my shoes and padding my bare feet into the kitchen, and searching in the fridge for a beer.  “I-I’ve never been here before” Stuart spoke, looking around.  It was a pretty open apartment, the kitchen and living room practically conjoined.  Only two doors, one leading to the bathroom, and one to my bedroom.

“No one has, really” I said, plopping two glasses onto the countertop, then searching for a bottle opener.

“Seriously?” Stuart walked over to me, standing on the other side of the counter.  I nodded, going through drawers until I finally found it.  I easily popped off the caps of the two glasses, and slid one over to him.  He took it happily and I picked up mine. 

“No, I don’t have company over for anything” I said with a shrug, heading to the living room.

“Not even Neha?” 

“Not a single person” I said, plopping onto the couch.  Stuart sat next to me, turning sideways to face me.  “To you Stuart Twombly” I said, raising my glass.  “For being my first guest” He rose his glass, to clink with mine.

We must’ve sat there for an hour, drinking until I was out of beer, and glasses of empty alcohol bottles were all over my coffee table.  Not necessarily to get drunk, but we were having too good of a time.  It was as though if we’d stopped, then the night would be over.  We were enjoying ourselves so much, talking and laughing about little things.  To think, the day before, that the only thing  could tell you about Stuart Twombly, was his name, and he had an obsession with beanies and his phone. 

“Okay okay okay…” I giggled and slurred drunkenly.  “I’ll pick… truth” I said with a big smile.  He was pensive for a moment, then grinned when he came up with an idea.

“Why’d you move here when you were so young?” 

“I wasn’t that young.  I was nineteen” I started, taking a swig of my beer.  “My hometown sucked.  I was bad at making friends so I didn’t have any, my parents… I didn’t have daddy and mommy issues by any means… but I needed a change” He nodded, content with my answer and took a drink.  “Now, truth or dare?” 

“Dare” He replied and I clapped my hands. 

“I dare you to do a handstand!” I squealed, and he eagerly jumped off of the couch, then awkwardly laid his upper back and neck on the floor, propping his legs up, then laying his hands flat on the ground.  He was able to hold himself up for a few seconds, but toppled over in a fit of laughter right afterwards. 

“I almost did it” He slurred, still chuckling as he sat back up on the sofa across from me.  We clinked glasses. 

“Oh so close” I said with a giggle before drinking.

“Alright y/n, truth or dare?” Stuart asked, and I thought while he took a long drink. 

“Okay… I’ll do a dare” I gave in, to his surprise.  I had been dodging that choice the past fifteen minutes we’ve been playing.  “Give me a good one though, not some lame ass prank call, you can do better than-” 

“I dare you to kiss me” He said, in the softest voice I’d heard all night.  My rambling was cut short, and I felt for a moment like I’d completely sobered up.  I was staring straight into his honey eyes.  I licked my lips hesitantly, then slid forward on the couch.  I set my beer on the table, as did he.  The entire environment of the room changed, and I realized my eyes had lingered on his lips for too long.  I sure had a problem with staring at this boy.  I looked up into his eyes for a moment, before closing mine and leaning in.

Our lips touched in a gentle kiss, my hands sliding up to frame around his face, pulling him ever so slightly closer.  Stuart’s arms wrapped around my waist, tugging me further against him on the couch, until our chests were pressed together.  I sucked in deep through my nose before we parted.  His eyes stared into mine, and neither of us moved.  Just our chests as we breathed deeply. 

“Th-that was my first kiss” I told him softly between quiet pants.  His brows knit together, confused. 

“What? H-how?” I blinked a few times, unsure of how to answer.  Maybe because I’d never had a boyfriend? But I wasn’t about to admit that now.  Stuart released my waist, a hand raising to tangle his fingers slightly into a strand of my hair. “Can you promise me something, y/n?” He asked in a murmur.  I nodded as he intricately placed the hair behind my ear.  “Promise me you won’t forget how beautiful you are” He said quietly.  I nodded my head after a moment.

“I promise” I answered, cheeks pink in a blush.  Stuart smiled a small but genuine smile, and pulled away from me.

We sat back on our respective sides of the couch, and continued our game. 

I thought for a moment as I remembered that night.  We were so carefree, and maybe it was the alcohol, but maybe it was just how we were in general.  Maybe we were just two young adults, enjoying our Friday night, getting to know each other.  Or maybe it was what I had thought.  Maybe we were falling in love.

Two weeks later, and Stuart and I were still complaining about our killer hangovers from our long night of drinking and talking.  I’d woken up the next morning on the couch, my head in his lap, cradling an arm that didn’t belong to me.  He was sat upright, his head hanging off the top of the couch and groaning about a headache.  I’d remembered the events from the night before, and somehow managed to get up to retrieve aspirin. 

Stuart and I became close friends.  Very close in fact.  The kind people constantly think are dating, not that I minded.  I wasn’t sure if he did.  I wasn’t even sure if he remembered what had all taken place that night, but I didn’t push the subject.  We became the kind of friends who walk around holding hands, or hug, share food and drink, kiss on the cheek here and there- hell even I would think we were dating.  (i wish).

We were sitting in my apartment, the night after our photo was taken at the cafe, his infamous beanie resting on my head.  In fact, I was wearing it as of this moment.  The both of us were sat on the sofa, watching tv.  He was scrolling through his phone while I laid across his lap, my head on the armrest of the couch. 

“Hey Stew” I said softly, not sure if I really wanted to ask the question I’d been hung up on for the past days.

“Mhm?” He dropped a hand to my arm to show he was paying attention, seeing that his eyes were glued to his phone. 

“Do you remember the night you came over?” 

“Mhm, worst hangover of my life” He snorted, glancing to me for a short moment.  “Why? Wanna get drunk?”

“No, no Stew it’s important” I said as seriously as I could, but my voice was still quiet.  His brows furrowed as he turned off his phone and looked at me. 

“Alright” He said, meeting my eyes.  “What’s going on in that messy head of yours?”

“Do you remember anything besides the hangover?” I asked, finding it difficult to hold his gaze.  “At all?” I asked when he didn’t answer. 

“Hold on I’m trying to think… I drank a lot that night” His eyes were squinted, and my heart managed to sink and beat faster at the same time.  “I… we played truth or dare…” He started slowly and I nodded eagerly. 

“Yeah yeah we did”

“And.. and I did a handstand?” I chuckled quietly and nodded again.  “And… and you told me ab-”

“You asked me to kiss you” Stuart’s brows raised.

“Well that would’ve been something to remember” Normally I would have laughed. 

“But-but you don’t?” Stuart shook his head.

“No… why was I bad?” He chuckled awkwardly to himself.  I pushed myself up, and crawled off of his lap.  “Why- are you alright?” I nodded, even though I wasn’t.  “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize I’d made things awkward for you that night” I just shook my head repeatedly, staring down at my lap, where my hands were wringing together.  “Hey is there.. Is there something else going on?” Stuart asked, turning to face me but I shook my head again.  “y/n/n don’t lie” He put one of his hands on mine.  “y/n” He said more sternly.  I hesitantly turned my head meeting his eyes and I felt my foot tap quickly on the ground.

“Sorry, sorry no I don’t know what- I don’t know what got into me” He frowned, but eventually got up and stretched a little.

“I’m gonna get a drink” He said, walking over to the kitchen.  I watched as he opened the fridge, and surprised me by pulling out a pop can. 

“No beer?” He shook his head.

That was the last time Stuart and I talked to each other.  Three months passed, and he hasn’t bothered to talk to me whatsoever.  I can’t really tell why, I don’t remember having done anything that would’ve driven him away.  The rest of that night I hadn’t mentioned the kiss, and it’s not like I admitted to him that I was in love with him.  At first, it just really pissed me off, but now I just keep more to myself than before, and tried to ignore him at all costs. 

No, that does not mean I’m happy.  In fact, I’m beyond miserable.  I don’t remember the last time I’d spoken to any of them, I’d hardly spoken at work at all.  Just on the phone when a customer or my boss called.  I’m not sure when Neha and I’s friendship ceased, somewhere along the line we just stopped talking.  Sometimes she sits at my small table in the cafe for lunch, but we still don’t converse.  Just sit there silently.

I walked in this morning, not anywhere near as dressed up as I used to get for work.  I was in jeans, old and worn biker boots, and a tee shirt.  My hair was in a ratty and messy bun, I don’t think I brushed my hair at all this morning.  In fact, I don’t even remember walking to the building (I lived just two blocks away) but I can’t tell you remembering the scenery or people I passed.  I groaned, rubbing my eyes as I sat down at my desk.  My elbows propped up onto the desk as I dragged the skin around the edges of my eyes, hoping to rub the sleep out of them.  It wasn’t working.  A small groan left my lips as I turned on my computer and began to sign in. 

“Good morning y/n” I jumped slightly, dropping my computer mouse onto the floor by my foot.  “Oh I’m sorr-” 

“It’s okay Lyle” I mumbled.  “What did you want?” He seemed to swallow thickly, and readjusted the glasses on his nose.  It made me think of the way Stuart used to always crinkle his nose before pushing his glasses up higher on the bridge of his nose.

“Well uh, I’ve actually noticed your lack of interaction with the rest of the team, are you alr-” 

“I’m fine, is here something important?” I snapped a little, but didn’t raise my voice.  I didn’t want the others to notice my ‘coming out of the shell I’d been hiding in’ moment. 

“Actually yes… someone from Communications is here to speak to you about your performance” I nodded my head.

“Well where are they?”

“At the door actually” I turned, and just as I did, Gharam walks over and stands himself next to Lyle, in front of me.  I stared with wide eyes up at him, having heard many stories from Neha and Stuart about Gharam and his… foolish charms.  “You look surprised darling” He spoke in an English accent, but something was off about it.

“I am, I wasn’t informed of any meeting, until here you are now” I straightened up, seeing that he was trying to intimidate me by leaning over, eyes downcast towards me.  I pulled a slight smirk on, just small enough to be noticeable but not questionable.  He only reciprocated it.

“Well love, I have an important question for you” You nodded, prompting him to continue.  “Attention! Low life Google team!” Gharam held his hands out, earning the attention of Neha, Billy, Nick, Yo Yo, and Stuart, who watched me intently.  But I looked back to Gharam.

“What’s this all abou-”

“Your very own lovely y/n here,has been given the opportunity of a promotion!” Besides Graham’s clapping, the room was silent.  I continued to stare at the englishman.  “What? No applause for this stunning creature?” I wanted to be flattered by his strange way of flirting, but instead I felt like regurgitating.  Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Stuart walking out of the room, shaking his head.  It would’ve broken my heart, if it wasn’t already shattered

“Why do I get a promotion?” I asked quietly, and Gharam grinned widely down towards me.

“Because you, my dear, would be a lovely head of the Communications department” My eyes widened like a cartoon, and my voice caught in my throat.  How? My work has been average.

“I-I think you’re at the wrong-”

“Oh don’t be so modest, we can discuss the paperwork over dinner” Gharam smirked and winked, and I took a step away from him, huffing angrily.

“But I like working here!” I stated loudly, and angrily.  My hands were in fists by my sides.  “I like my group, I like my job I like my payroll, I don’t want a promotion” The man laughed loudly, holding his hands over his stomach like it was the most comical thing he’d ever heard anyone say.

“Oh don’t be ridiculous darling” He said, reaching a finger to swipe his thumb over my cheek.  I smacked his hand away with a slap that seemed to silence the room even more.  I didn’t notice that this was when Stuart came back into the room, I was too focused on the man in front of me.

“I’m not taking a job just so you can go out with me” I snapped at him, and moved to walk back towards my work space, but he followed me quickly.

“Problem? Gharam?” I spun back on my heel in shock of the voice I hadn’t heard in what felt like years.  Stuart Twombly was standing in front of me, his back towards me and Gharam trying to tower over him.  In seconds I watched as Gharam backed away, shaking his head and standing silently frozen.  “Come on y/n” Before I could say anything, Stuart took my hand pulled me with him out the door of our large office flat.  I walked quietly beside him, my hand still stuck in his as he led me through the hallways.  I looked over at him, but he kept his focus on his walking.  Dead ahead.  He was on a mission it seemed.

“Stuart?” I spoke, my voice practically a mumble as we neared the exit of the building. 

“Where have you been?” He asked as he pushed open the doors, with me still following right next to him.  It was the first time his hand released mine.

“I haven’t been anywhere” I muttered, my eyes narrowing slightly at his apparent anger.  “What, you’re mad at me because I haven’t been around?” He ducked his head down, instantly realizing his mistake.  “Wow.  Wow Stuart” I laughed bitterly, a passive aggressive grin on my face as I looked up.  My palm pressed to my forehead as I calmed down my laughter.  “If you don’t mind, I have work to get to” I said, turning to go back inside. 

“N-no don’t leave” He quickly ran in front of me, hands out and a pleading expression on his face.  “Please don’t just go” 

“And why the hell not?”

“Because I miss you y/n!” He yelled exasperatedly, and my mouth hung open in shock.  “I really fucking miss you” His voice softened, and I blinked, licking my lips before closing my mouth. 

“I missed you too” I said weakly. 

“And I do remember that night, I remember it vividly, every goddamn second of it” I couldn’t bring myself to tear my eyes off of him. 

“Y-you did? Then why did you-”

“Cause I didn’t want to say the wrong thing… guess I did anyways” I frowned slightly, stepping a little closer to him. 

“What did you think that you were going to say that would make me upset?”

“Upset’s not really the word… more like.. More like distant.  I thought you’d be distant and I didn’t want to lose you or anyth-”

“What were you going to say?” I cut off his ramblings, stepping closer again, if I took one more step, then our noses would ‘bump together. 

“I was going to tell you that..” He trailed off for a moment, looking down at his feet.  “That um.. That I…” My eyebrows raised in anticipation.  “y/n I really like you, I don’t know how you did it but you got me to fall for you in a matter of one night and I swear it wasn’t cause we were both drunk off our ass it was because you’re the first person I’ve ever met that’s… that’s real you felt real to me and I- I wanted to tell you that and I almost did but I didn’t want to mess things up-”

“You would’ve messed everything up” I told him. 

“I know” He said quietly.

“Absolutely everything, you would’ve ruined everything” I heard him sniffle, and he still stared down at his feet.  I chuckled quietly, and curled my fingers under his jaw, bringing his face up to look at me, even though he was practically above me.  “But it would’ve been in the best way possible” I told him solemnly.  I watched his eyes light up, and I smiled softly.  Next thing I knew he leaned down, and gently pressed his lips against mine.

“I’m sorry” He mumbled between sweet kisses.  “I shouldn’t have lied around it I should’ve just told you” I opened my eyes as his arms wrapped around my back, tugging me against him in a tight hug.  I smiled, arms winding around his neck and holding myself there against him.

“Try not to ‘forget’ that kiss, okay?” Stuart chuckled against me.

“I’m not sure how I could”

guys i can’t tell you how happy i am to post again :)
xoxo ~ joride


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Work Events - Stuart Twombly

You weren’t great when it came to social situations.  So standing in your crowded work building for a ‘party’ your boss was throwing, was making you uncomfortable quickly.  In fact, you hadn’t even wanted to attend the event, but your team member, and friend, Neha, forced you too.  Of course as soon as you arrived, she ditched you.  And you’ve been standing alone with a red plastic cup of booze in your hand since.  For the past ten minutes, you’d been looking for your friends, or a familiar face that you could cling to so you were less alone.  But no one was around.

“Well don’t you look beautiful” You spun to see the owner of the familiar voice.  “Didn’t think I’d see you here” Gharam said with a slight smirk.  You suddenly flt even more insecure in the dress you wore.  It wasn’t revealing, at least not too much, but the way his eyes raked over your body made you wish you wore a long coat.

“Yeah I’m not really one for parties… but my friends thought I should come”

“Ah yes… your team is… very interesting yes?” He chuckled and you didn’t say anything.  “The grown men who couldn’t hold their job, the home schooled asian, the kinky girl, oh, and I couldn’t possibly forget mr gloomy beanie” He laughed, and you shifted on your feet.

“Don’t say that, they’re my friends” You said.

“Oh you do stand out though don’t you? Physically I mean” You stepped back a little.

“If you’re hitting on me I don’t-”

“Don’t what? What’s not to like?” Gharam smirked, stepping towards you again.  “Am I not smart enough?” He laughed to himself, and you didn’t know what to do.  You couldn’t just run away, but he wouldn’t leave you alone.

“Look, I should really find my friends” You said as politely as possible, and moved to walk away.  BUt his hand snatched your wrist.

“You’re actually turning me down?” He asked.

“Gharam what the hell- let go” You struggled in his grip, and ended up dropping your cup down by the hells of your shoes.

“I can’t believe you actually think you’re turning me down-”

“Too bad jackass” You stumbled back as Gharam was yanked off of you.  You looked over to see Stuart standing behind him, holding the back collar of his suit jacket.  “Go take your ignorance somewhere else” He said, shoving the english boy away.

“Fuck you.  Just another pretty girl anyways.  There’s millions of pretty girls!” He yelled, but walked off before Stuart could do anything else.

“Fucking wimp” Stuart muttered before looking to you.  “You okay?” He asked, realizing you were massaging your wrist.  

“Ye-yeah I’ll be fine” You said quietly.  “Have you seen Neha?”

“Yeah she went off with some other intern like five minutes ago” You sighed.  “Let me guess, she made you come, then ditched you?” You chuckled, looking down nervously.

“Yep.  That would be it”

You’d had a crush on Stuart from the moment you came to Google.  When teams were first made, you walked around aimlessly, too nervous to approach anyone.  But Stuart came to you, saying he didn’t want to work with any of the other assholes, and that you seemed nice.  You remember blushing, and apologizing for not knowing how to talk to people.  The both of you ended up getting put in a group of the other outliers.

“Hey, hey y/n you alright?” Stuart waved his hand in front of your face.  “You zoned out there” You nodded, licking your lips.

“Yeah I think I’m just gonna walk back to my dorm” You mumbled, shaking your head.  You moved to walk away, and Stuart followed next to you.

“W-well how long have you been here? Like when did you get here, I didn’t see you come in”

“I don’t know, a little while ago” You replied.

“Oh..okay” Stuart said.  His hand barely laid on your back as you walked through the crowds of people.  “Will you come outside with me?” You looked over at him, taking in his appearance tonight.  His head didn’t have a beanie, but his hair spiked up.  He was dressed nice, khakis with a maroon button down.  The sleeves rolled up to his elbows.  His eyes flicked around behind his glasses.

“Yeah… okay” You said, and walked with him out the doors into the dark grassy area.  The music was still heard from inside, and there were some people around, but not as many.  You let out a long breath of relief, and closed your eyes.

“y/n can I ask you a question?” Stuart asked, and you nodded.  “If you hate these social things so much, why’d you come?”

“Well I don’t hate them, I’m just.. I’m bad at them” Stuart nodded.  You looked down at your dress, rocking on your heels.

“For what it counts… you um, you look really nice for only wanting to stay for half an hour” You giggle nervously.

“Th-thanks” You stuttered nervously.

“So.  Why do you think you’re bad at this? You’re doing fine now”

“Sure but I actually know you, I can’t just talk to new people” You said, shaking your head downwards.

“Okay, well if there was no social anxiety” He waved his hands out as he spoke.  “If it was just you here, then what would you have done? Besides sulk” You chuckled a little, pushing your hair back behind your ear as you thought.

“Um… I don’t know… drank, danced, punch Gharam” Stuart chuckled.  “Maybe tried to meet new people”

“You’re lucky miss y/n, I can help you with all of those things”

“Oh- oh no no I don’t think that I- no…”

“No it’s no problem come on” He pulled on your forearms, but you shook your head.

“No no I can’t do that” You said sheepishly.  

“And why not? What’s stopping you?” You made a short whining sound in your throat, looking at the other small groups of people scattered in the courtyard.  Far from you and Stuart though.

“I just.. I can’t I can’t with people I’m sorry” You shook your head again and walked off to a table, plopping into the chair, and hanging your head in your hands.  Stuart crouched in front of you, the both of you in a whole private area now, where students usually eat lunch.  It felt like your chest was constricting in on you.

“Hey, hey that’s okay it can just be.. Um, you and me tonight- if-if that’s okay… with you?” You didn’t say anything, just tried to catch your breath.  “Do you want to do that?” You breathed in and out heavily a few times, then nodded, and he took both of your hands, standing up.  “Okay then… here come with me” He helped you up, and kept a hand in yours as you walked further away from all the crowd.  The blasting music inside became distant but was still present.

“Where are we going?”

“Inside” Stuart smirked a little, opening the door to the cafeteria.  He held his hand out, motioning for you to go in first.  You smiled a little, walking inside cautiously.  All the lights in this part of the building were off, setting an eerie vibe but soon Stuart was walking with you again and you felt better.

“What’re we doing?” You whispered, following as he walked further.

“Getting food” He responded casually, grabbing an orange out of a basket at the coffee stand.

“Are you sure that this is… okay?” You asked, and he shrugged.

“Sure why not?” He asked, getting a pear for himself.  “Want something to drink?” And before you knew it, he jumped up on the counter, sliding over it and going behind the cash register.

“Oh my god!” You whisper screamed.  “Get out! What if there’s cameras!?” You hissed.  Stuart shrugged.

“Chocolate milk, regular milk, apple juice, water, or fruit punch?” He asked.  You wrapped your arms around yourself, and looked around the place.  It seemed vacant to you…

“Chocolate milk” You answered, and he slid a mini bottle across the counter.  You took it, but he stopped you.

“Ah ah ah, that’s gonna cost” He said before you could drink it.

“Twombly you don’t actually work there, you’re a burglar” You said, and he snatched the drink from you.  “Hey-!”

“It’s gonna cost” He repeated, brows raised, a hint of a smile on his lips.  You rolled your eyes and groaned.

“Then screw it, I didn’t bring any money anyways” You said, and he laughed.

“I’ll let you choose the payment” He said, and you shrugged with a slight nod.  “For this chocolate milk, you owe me… a kiss-”

“In your dreams” You interrupted, and tried not to blush.

“-Or do my chores, or a dance” He finished.  You thought.

“What’re your chores?”

“Laundry and-”

“I’ll choose the dance one” You said quickly, and took back your drink.  Stuart grinned childishly, and hopped back over the counter.  The both of you sat at a table inside, quietly eating and listening to the booming music that seemed far far away from you.

Stuart watched as you seemed to avoid his gaze.  Your eyes focused on peeling your orange with your fingernails.  He often caught himself staring at you, but it’s not like he could really help it.  You were beautiful.  And witty, you didn’t talk too much with the rest of the team, but sometimes you’d work up the courage to say something witty, and everyone would laugh.  He liked the way you smiled and the way your cheeks dusted with pink when you made people laugh.  It was like you didn’t think it’d be funny, but somehow it was hilarious.  He liked the way you concentrated, on a notebook or computer screen.  You’d lick your lips and squint your eyes.  Stuart would often see you walking around the building, your bag on your shoulder, a book in one hand and your phone in the other.  You were a lot like him in the sense that you always kept your phone close, and often looked at it to avoid interaction.

He smiled awkwardly when he realized that you’d caught him staring.  “You’re make me nervous sometimes” You said quietly, eyes flicking from the tabletop to his, then back to the table.


“Because you stare” Stuart felt his chest get hot, and is hands got clammy.

“Why does that make you nervous?” He asked you gently, and you popped the last orange slice in your mouth.  You fidgeted it with your tongue, then opened your lips, revealing it with a big smile.  Stuart laughed, and you giggled as you chewed and swallowed.  He didn’t really realize that that’s how you avoided his question.

“What do we do now?” You asked in a soft voice.  Stuart smiled wide, and pulled his phone out.  You didn’t see what he was doing, but in a few seconds, soft music was playing.  You blushed immediately, registering that now was when you paid him for the milk.  “I don’t really know how to dance” You said quietly as he held his hand out from you and stood.

“That makes it more fun” He said.  You bit the inside of your cheek, and slipped your hand into his.  You rose from the seat, and let him pull you into a more empty area.  He took his shoes off, standing in socks on the tiled linoleum floor.  You giggled, stepping out of your heels and kicking them slightly towards his.  “Just relax, it’s fine, it’s just you and me, no one else is here” You nodded, and let out a breath.  Stuart pulled you closer, one hand dropping and landing on your waist, the other staying in yours.  You stood there, having no idea what to do.  “Like this” He murmured, his open hand moving your wrist up to his shoulder, and your right hand laid on the back of his neck, your left hand intertwined with his by your shoulders.  Stuart smiled down at you, his left hand falling back on your waist.  You stared down at your bare feet, swaying back and forth.  You were on the tips of your toes, and his foot nudged yours slightly so you stood flat.  Making you feel even shorter.

“I guess it’s not that hard” You said with a little laugh.  You looked up at him, his eyes already downcast to yours.  He smiled at you and nodded.

“See? I told you” Stuart said in a whisper.  Your close proximity became noticeable, and you blushed red.  “Here let’s try something” He moved back, holding both of your hands, and extending you out.  You giggled as he released the one, and spun you around.  He pulled you back, your chest against his and you avoided his gaze bashfully.  You kept dancing with him even when the next song came on.  And after a few minutes, he pulled you to stand up on his feet.  You laughed joyously, arms wrapped behind his neck, his around your waist as you just danced around with big smiles.

“You’re right, this is fun” You said, stepping off his feet.  Stuart thought for a moment that you were done, but you kept swaying with him.  “Do the spin thing again” You said, and he chuckled, pushing you out and spinning you around before pulling you back to him.  Both of your hands were in his, fingers hooked together.  You giggled, looking up at him through your lashes.  Your features softened and he stared back at you.  “Thanks for the night Stew” You hummed.

“Yeah… yeah no problem” He responded.  There came a point where you weren’t really dancing anymore, your bodies just moving slightly back and forth.  He was bent over a little, neck craned down, his nose bumped your head here and there.  His eyes traveled down from yours to your parted lips.  Your breath hitched when you caught this glance.  You wanted to kiss him, you actually really wanted to.

But you couldn’t.  You didn’t know how, you’d never kissed anyone or been kissed, what if you did something dumb? What if he laughed.  Your smile fell a little, and Stuart instantly noticed your shift in mood.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, and you shook your head dismissively.

“Just the anxiety catching up with me” You said, stepping back just a little bit.  But again, he noticed.

“Why what happened? Did I do something wrong?”

“No no, it’s not you, it’s me, really, I just can’t- I can’t do some things”

“What things?” He asked, brow furrowing.  “You don’t have to do anything, we can just go sit somewhere and be silent if you want” You didn’t say anything, but you also didn’t move out of his hold.  So you just let go of his hands, and slid your arms to wrap around his neck.  You pressed against him again, your nose pushed against his shoulder, the side of your head against his jaw.  His arms wrapped around your back as though hugging you, and again, you rocked back and forth.  “y/n” You hummed in response, closing your eyes.  “I had a really good time with you tonight” He told you, and you smiled sleepily.

“Yeah I had a good time with you too Stuart” You told him.  “Sorry that I couldn’t go be in the part area though”

“No don’t be, I’d rather be here anyways” He said, and you pulled back slightly, but just enough to be face to face with him again.

“You would?” He just nodded, a short ‘mhm’ in his throat.  You smiled softly.  “You know I’m not… I’m not good around people, and especially talking to them and talking about how I feel and things that normal people seem to do regularly but… but you make that easier for me” Stuart smiled.

“I do? Really?”

“Yeah… you do” You whispered.  “Stuart I-” You cut yourself off, suddenly growing nervous that you would ruin a good thing that you had going.


“No nevermind” You said, looking down, and he hooked a finger under your chin, raising your head to meet his eyes again.

“It’s okay, tell me” He said softly.

“ I don’t think it’s a good idea” You say, chuckling a little.  Stuart smiled to himself.

“Well then can I tell you something?” You nodded, and the hand under your chin moved to tuck back a loose strand of hair.  “You are very beautiful” He said, and you blushed instantly.  “And, very smart” He added.  “I had a wonderful night dancing with you y/n” You looked down for a moment.  “I really like you” Your lashed shot back up, shocked by the words he just said.

“You-you do?” He nodded, his moment of courage over and nerves settling back in.  “I like you too” You admitted, biting your lip hard.  His smile grew wider with relief.

“Thank God, I thought you were gonna leave me hanging there” He said, and you giggled, moving forward a little as you did, and your nose accidently bumped his.  “So… so can I kiss you now?” He asked, and you looked from his lips to his eyes, nodding your head just slightly.  In seconds, his long fingers cupped your cheeks, and he pressed his lips softly against yours.  Your hands laid on his chest, standing on the tips of your toes to reach him properly.  He was warm, and the kiss was sweet.  “When you parted, you kept your eyes closed, your forehead pressed against his.  “That was your first kiss wasn’t it?” Stuart asked, and you nodded.


“Don’t be.  It was perfect” You giggled, and pulled him in for another one, smiling into it.

Overtime you became more open, because you came to every work event with Stuart.  Every time you’d make it a goal to talk to a few new people, dance around, drink a little, and try to let loose.  But at the end of every party, you and Stuart would sneak off to the cafeteria.  The lights were never on, and no one was ever around.  So you’d dance together and kiss and laugh, and it was just as he always said it was.  It was always perfect.

yes i finally watched the internship.  heart eyes x 10000
xoxo ~ jordie

this is my goddaughter Gharam! if you don’t think she is the cutest darling babe… we have nothing to talk about

character by domirine, name by me! (seriously y'all check her out she draws amazing skyrim stuff and other game fan arts too!)

actually i did not intend this as a christmas gift in particular but merry early christmas anyway! by the way… doesn’t this make us like, some kind of in-laws? SISTERS EVEN?

I’m sorry I was so uncreative this time I couldn’t come up with a background so she’s just like standing around I will do better next time I promise *sobs*


Gharam  الأردنيه غرام  - Arab Jordanian singer , actress and model.

Gharam is a Jordanian singer, model and actress. Gharam refuses to say her real name, and thus stated to her fans that her artistic name reflects her and there is no need to know her real name.

Gharam has been crowned as the most beautiful Jordanian singer, by Sawsan Al Sayyed in her program “Malikat” on Hiya TV. She has been appreciated for her work and the difficult times she has encountered with the Arabic media, and especially the Jordanian public views.

Gharam has shot a video clip for her song “Saddikni” and it was banned to be broadcasted for political reasons. The video clip included hot scenes and sexy shows of girls who danced in the mud and at the same time views from the devastating war that has been prevailing in the Arab countries for years.
Many people resembled Gharam by the famous Lebanese singer Haifa Wehbe. However Gharam refuses this resemblance, and stated that she is much younger than Haifa and each has her own style. As for accusing her of imitating Dana’s video clips, this has also created rumors in the media. Finally, Gharam and her fight with the Jordanian public, led her to declare that she quit being too expressive and will focus on art and music professionally. Gharam cannot break the Jordanian traditions on her own, and gets disappointed when she sees that the Jordanian public accepts Lebanese artists as they are and complain about Jordanian singers.

The day will come when the Jordanian singer will prove to her country Jordan that through her music and style, she will succeed more than anyone else.

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