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Hello and welcome to The Great Middle Earth Bake Off!

Before we get started on the making and baking tomorrow evening, I thought it would be nice for you to meet your amateur bakers!

So have a read, and tag, comment or inbox me to vote for your favourite baker to avoid their elimination from the competition!


Bard Bowman

An interesting entry to Bake Off given that he had no idea he had been entered, the baking he does for his children had inspired them to put their da forward.

Bard works as a mechanic in Wales, living with his three children they have been the inspiration for most of Bard’s baking creations, his youngest Tilda promises that his caterpillar cakes are a force to be reckoned with.

Far from a perfectionist, Bard is much more about substance than style in his baking, will that scupper him in the showstopper challenge?

Thranduil Oropherion

How does one describe Thranduil Oropherion? Driven, confident, patient, perfectionist.

Thranduil is a CEO based in Surrey, and has been considering entering Bake Off for a few years now, but it is only this year that his little son Legolas has deemed him finally ready, and it must be said, he seems to be right.

Thranduil’s attention to detail and patience will no doubt make him a force to be reckoned with in the technical bake, but will he have trouble keeping to the allocated time? In restricted time, sometimes patience is not such a virtue.

Bilbo Baggins

Bilbo Baggins of Bag End, in the small Hamlet on Hobbiton deep in the countryside of Hertfordshire has been baking since before he could walk, reportedly it was something his mother and father loved to do together, even if for a while Bilbo threw more flour around than actually helped bake.

Encouraged by his boyfriend, a Mr Thorin Oakenshield, and his nephew Frodo, Bilbo has finally entered Bake Off, heading in with a very calm and collected attitude.

Bilbo is likely to own the signature bake challenge, but is he adventurous enough in his baking to really take on the showstopper round?

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Chapter Seventeen is up!

And it has Everlark!!

Many thanks to @starveinsafety for the awesome banner!

Huge thanks to my beta @javistg (read her stuff)!

Peeta leaned over the Yule log cake. It was a very detailed project and he loved working on them. All the world melted away and he was able to just focus on every tiny bit of bark and the bits of fungi that clung to it.

“Hey, Peanut, you going to pick up the kids?” Conrad asked over his shoulder.

Peeta floated back to the real world and looked up at the clock. “Oh! Yeah, I better.” He slid the cake off the table and headed toward the fridge. “This is almost done, I think.”

“It looks great.” Conrad said. “And your phone’s been ringing in your locker.” He went back into the kitchen.

Peeta got his phone and keys from his locker and checked his messages as he made his way out the back. Katniss had sent him a text.

Katniss: Can I call you when I get off work?

Peeta smiled and wrote his reply. Sure! I’m watching the Odair kids. Annie and Finnick are doing their Christmas shopping. You could come over. That wouldn’t violate your rules, would it?

Read on FFN or AO3.

Shape of You
*based on the song by Ed Sheeran

The club isn’t the best place to find a lover
So the bar is where I go
Me and my friends at the table doing shots
Drinking faster and then we talk slow
Come over and start up a conversation with just me
And trust me I’ll give it a chance now

“Let us cheers to another Hydra base taken and another mission in the books.”

Bucky held up his shot glass along with the other guys in the team. He took the shot and set the empty glass back on the table.

“Another round on me.” Tony said, gesturing to the waitress for more drinks.

The guys were all having a good time at a bar that just opened near the Tower. After a couple of stressful few days on a mission, everyone decided that a night out was needed. Everyone wanted to get their minds off of work and the stress of saving the world from bad guys to cut loose for a night.

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*Request: Can you do an imagine where Chibs x Reader have been together for a few months and he spends time with the reader and her daughter? A big ball of fluff! I mean, c'mon… Chibs and kids? *ovaries gone!* lol*

“Hey Lass.” Your old man Chibs greeted you as you were dropping off lunch for him. “Here you go fat ass.” You said smiling. You had cooked last night and of course he wanted you to go home from work to fix a plate for his lunch and bring him the food that he could’ve fixed on his own. “You never fail to make me happy.” He said grabbing the food. “Yeah I needed to get off work anyways because I need to find a baby sitter for tonight whenever I go to my second job. Brittany is sick so I’m fucking screwed.” You said shaking your head. “Well i got to go because I need to call one of my friends to see if her daughter will watch my kid.” “Alright lass, call me when you get home.” Chibs said.

“Buffy? Can Claire watch my kid tonight? My usual baby sitter is sick with a stomach bug so I need a baby sitter because I cannot miss work tonight.” You asked your friend. “I’m sorry Y/N but Clair has a volleyball game tonight like 45 minutes out and I doubt she’ll be back in time to watch your daughter.” Buffy said. You put your head down because as soon as Buffy told you that, you knew you were screwed for tonight and you could possibly lose your job. “Okay thanks hun.” You told her and hung up the phone. Once you picked your daughter Nicole up from school and got situated in your house, you called Chibs. “Hey love.”Chibs said into the phone bringing some ease to your stressful mind. “UGHHHHH!” You said back to him. “I’m guessing you couldn’t find a baby sitter.” He said smartly. “Yeah, no shit. Jim is going to fire my ass this time. I’ve missed too many days.” You said. Chibs could hear the stress in your voice. “Well, I can watch her?” Chibs said causing you to immediately pick your head up in confusion. “Wait, foreal?” “Yeah, we are done here and there’s gonna be a party later and instead I can just watch Nicole for you.” He said. “Okay, Ill see you when you get here.” You said hanging up the phone about to head to shower before before.

______________________________________________________________

“Hey lass.” Chibs said as you greeted him at the door. “Thank you for doing this Baby, I really needed this.” “Your my woman, why wouldn’t I do this for you? He said. “Okay well she has already done her homework, ate, and took a bath. She should be okay for the rest of the night. Her bedtime is at 8:30, don’t let her tell you anything different.” You said to him walking in circles at this point. “Okay doll, I got it. I do have a daughter you know.” He said “Yeah but she is older and you haven’t took care of a child in a long time Chibs, I just don’t want her to be such a big strain on you. You know what? I’ll just stay here, I’m fine. Jim can kiss my ass.” You said about to go change out of your work clothes. Chibs grabbed you and said,”No Y/N, go to work I have this. If I need anything I’ll call Gemma for help. I doubt we will need any help.” He said looking at Nicole. You smiled and said, “Okay then, I’m going. Bye babies!” You said closing your door. You laughed to yourself because Chibs had no idea what the hell he was getting himself into with Nicole. 

“Can we watch Beauty and the Beast?” Nicole said to Chibs tugging on his cut. “Sure sweetheart, whatever you want.” Chibs said. as soon as he said that Nicole’s face lit up with excitement and said, “I want popcorn,peanut m&m’s,and a strawberry soda to go with the movie.” “Okay I’ll get to it sweetheart.” Chibs said. “Thank you.” Nicole said smiling and wlking off to the couch. After Chibs got the snacks they watched Beauty and The Beast. The movie ended just in time for Nicole’s bedtime. “Alright love, time for bed.” Chibs said rubbing his own eyes because he had gotten tired from watching the movie. “What?! No! We have to play princess now. My mom let’s me all the time after we watch this movie.” She said looking up at Chibs with her Big hazel eyes, which were so hard to say no to. “Okay, only until 9:15.” She smiled and ran to her room to change into her princess dress. “Oh Lord.” Chibs said to himself knowing Nicole wouldn’t probably go to sleep at 9:15.

______________________________________________________________

“Okay, you need to put on your scarf and wear your crown.” Nicole said to Chibs. “Is this how I’m post to hold the cup?” He said sticking his pinky out and sipping strawberry soda out of a teacup. His phone rang and he answered the phone call without looking at who was calling. “Yeah?” He said. “Hey, how was everything? I hope she wasn’t trouble trying to put her to sleep.” You said while taking a drag from your cigarette since you were on break. “Um, yeah. Piece of cake.” Chibs said to you looking at Nicole, telling her to stay quiet. “Is that my mommy?” Nicole said eagerly. “Chibs! It’s 11 o’clock. Why isn’t she sleep?” You said angrily. “We was playing princess party and lost track of time. She’s going to sleep now.” “NO!!” Nicole said running into the bathroom and locking the door. “She locked herself in the restroom didn’t she? You said rolling your eyes. He said, “How did you know?” “She always does that when she doesn’t go to bed on time.” You said. “Oh shit.” He said. “Well, I’m off of break, get her to sleep!” You said and hung up. “Nicole, please open up.” Chibs said knocking on the door. “No, just leave me alone!.” She said throwing a brush to the door.

“Come out and I’ll sing you a song to sleep.” Chibs said trying to get her out of the restroom. Nicole was quiet and slowly opened the door to see Chibs on the floor by the bathroom door. “Can you sing me this little light of mine? That’s the only song I remember my grandma singing me.” She said with her sad eyes. “Well sweetheart, I guess I owe you a song.” Chibs said grabbing her hand…. You were on your way home praying to God that Nicole was sleep and that the house wasn’t a complete disaster. Once you pulled up to the house you braced yourself to walk into a messy house, but instead the dishes were clean and the living room just had empty cups on the table. You made your way to Nicole’s room to find her sleep and Chibs sleep on the floor holding her hand. You laughed to yourself because he had on a crown and a fluffy scarf, which caused him to wake up. “Hey love.” Chibs said looking up. “Shhh” You said waving your hands for him to come to you so the talking wouldn’t wake up Nicole. As you were closing the door Nicole told Chibs, “Thanks for being a good pretend daddy.” Chibs smiled and kissed her goodnight. “You closed the door and said, “What all did you two do?” “We bonded.” He said. “You were right though. She is a handful and a little boss at that, I don’t think Nicole is just enough because kids can be a bit much. He said laughing. You smiled and looked at him with a huge smile. “Yes, no more kids. Come on, lets go to sleep “daddy”.” You said laughing taking his hand in the bedroom.

Joe Sugg - You surprise him in America

Your boyfriend Joe Sugg left for LA last week and you are already dying to see him but luckily you are packing a bag to go over there but not that he knows that. You had planning this surprise visit for a number of months with Joe’s best friend Caspar who would also be with him.

Joe had begged and begged you to come with him to LA but you couldn’t get the time off of work but in the end after much begging with your boss you had been allowed but you thought a surprise would be better so you planned to turn up one week into the trip.

-

When getting onto the plane you had been feeling very excited but once you had landed and was getting off you had become very nervous, of course you watched all of Joe’s videos especially vlogs because it helped you feel as though you were closer to him and from them you could see that he was having a lot of fun so you didn’t want to turn up and ruin that for him because Caspar and Oli had now given Joe the nickname of being boring because he would rather stay with you than go out with them and you didn’t want this to happen.

You shake off the thought and pick up your bag, you walk to the point where Oli said he would meet you to take you to Joe. You are stood glancing in every direction every couple of seconds feeling rather embarrassed being stood in the middle of the airport on your own but you suddenly feel someone wrap their arms around you to spin you around while you scream in delight

“Put me down Oli!” you giggle throwing your arm over your shoulder to hit him gently.

“Hello little one” he says once he has put you down

You throw yourself into Oli’s arms to give him a proper hug, you never realised how attached you had come to all these boys especially Joe of course and now you were just itching to get to him

“Okay let’s go crazy” Oli laughs picking up your bag and suitcase

-

“You ready?” Oli asks opening the door to the Uber, you nod but then remember he has his back to you so he can’t see

“Yes” you say shakily climbing out the other side, you had gone to the house that all the boys were staying at to drop your things off before climbing back into another car to come to where Caspar was keeping Joe busy.

“Here” Oli says handing you his vlogging camera, you look at him with raised eyebrows “So you can capture the moment” he shrugs pushing the camera too you

You set the camera up and start to walk towards Joe who has his back to you, you try to sneak but as always Joe can’t be surprised or pranked, it’s like he has an internal device telling him when someone is trying to sneak up on him. Joe looks over his shoulder to smile at Oli and then turns back around momentarily before spinning around again.

“What are you doing here” he grins pointing to you as he walks towards you

Joe wraps you in a extremely tight hug that is gentle at the same time and it shows you how much he has missed you.

“I got the time off but i wanted to surprise you” you explain before Joe kisses you

“I love you so much” Joe says kissing you between each word

“You have to promise me one thing” you say sternly

“Anything princess” Joe smiles hugging you once again still not over the fact that you are really there with him

“You have to stick with the plans you have made even if i don’t come with you” you say and from behind him you can see Caspar and Oli look at each other 

“But…” Joe starts and when he see’s the look on your face he sighs “Fine” he agrees and Caspar and Oli look back at the two of you in disbelief

“I’m so glad you’re here” Joe adds before kissing you again and again

Chill - neymar imagine

Tonight you’re heading to Neymar’s house. You are going to just chill and have fun with him, which is something you enjoy a lot. You’ve known each other for a long time through some friends, but you never felt attracted to him in that way until your friends set the two of you up on a date and you just started seeing each other after that.

You’re working at a place that’s not far away from Camp Nou, so Neymar just asked you to come see him after his game. You were quite nervous, because you’ve never been with him and his teammates, and you have no idea of how they’re going to react and how Ney is going to be around you and them at the same time.
You get off work early and on your way to Camp Nou you see a lot of fans walking away. You meet some staff who guide you to where the players are. You follow them inside. The manly voices and laughter are getting louder and louder. You know it’s the guys. You look to the side and something catches your eyes. Neymar.
He looks at you with a smile that goes from his lips to his beautiful eyes, “Hey Y/N”, his soft voice says.
You run up to him giving him a hug. You can feel his arms tighten around you. “I’ve missed you”, you whisper.
He loosens his grib around you as he’s staring into your eyes, “I’ve missed you too”. He gives you a kiss on the cheek before he wraps his arms around you again.
You notice him wearing some type of cologne. Does he always smell this good? It almost doesn’t seem like he has been training. You can feel his hands traveling down your body.
“Oooh Ney”, you hear a loud voice. You’ve heard it before, but it wasn’t one of your friends, but Ney definitely had. His grib around you loosens, which makes you turn your body to see who it was. You see the tall figures of Pique and Suarez with grinning faces.
Neymar quickly moves to your side, “Boys, this is Y/N. Y/N this is Geri and Luis.”
They open their arms to give you a hug. As you could feel your smile and blush coming through your cheeks you quickly bury your face in the chests of the two taller guys. It feels like a dream and it’s weird to see them in real life.
You let go of them and you can feel Neymar grabbing your hand as he puts his fingers between yours. The two of you say goodbye to Pique and Suarez and walk towards the exit.
“So that’s the girl Ney talked about” you heard one of the boys say.

You follow Neymar as he walks inside his house. It’s big. Aside from you no one was home. He locks the door. Holy crap. You and Ney were alone at his house.
He asks you to sit down on the couch in his living room, “Do you want something to eat? Or drink?”, he asks as he smiles.
“Are you trying to get me drunk already?”, you ask him teasingly.
“Isn’t that what you’re going to do if you’re gonna get the girl to sleep with you?” he laughs.
You shake your head and he walks into the kitchen. You can not believe how spacious his house was but everything was so comfy. You grab his remote to the tv and lean back as you turn it on.
He comes back with two clear glasses with water.
“So you decided on not getting me drunk?”, you smile at him.
“Hey, you could never know. Maybe it’s vodka.”
He sits down besides you and places the glasses on the coffee table. You lay your head on his shoulder. His puts his hand on your thigh rubbing your inner thigh.
“You didn’t tell me what you’d like to eat babe” his voice is getting lower, and his speech gets slower.
“I don’t know. Maybe we could just order pizza?”, you look at him. His eyes are soft and lighting up.
“We could also just you know …”
Before you can think of what he just said, he pushes you down, so your back is against his soft couch. He places his warm lips on your collarbones leaving kisses as he makes his way up to your lips. His lips feel soft. You open your lips and place your hands on the sides of his face trying to pull him closer. Your slow kisses and movements get rougher, but you dont mind. This is what you’ve wanted.
Not breaking from the kiss he sits up making you sit on his lap. His hands travel up under your shirt reaching your bra.
“Damn girl.”
You could feel his smirk as he kisses you again, which makes you grin.
He stops kissing you and leans back. Why did he do that? He smiles, but you’re still confused. You pull away from him and sit next to him. He gets up and take a sip of his water.
“Pizza sounds good, babygirl” he says looking at you smirking.

*SEND IN REQUESTS*

Pietro Imagine: It’s a cake… I think.

It was your birthday today and Pietro had decided he was going to bake a cake for you. After warning you to not come out of your room he got to work locating a cook book.  It took Pietro almost 15 minutes before Pietro could even find a decent recipe and once he did he had no idea what half of these words meant, I mean his English was almost perfect but he had no idea Drizzle was a word.

“Prikhodi Odin (Come on)” he spoke in his thick accent, running a hand through his hair before cursing slightly. Pietro just wanted to make your birthday special, this was your first birthday with Pietro and you together, so he wanted to make it one everyone would remember forever.  

Putting down the book he noted the ingredients needed and sped of down to the giant kitchen. This was SHIELD of course, there was s a giant kitchen filled with many ingredients the staff used to cook daily. SHIELD had given them their own small apartment for all the Avengers but Pietro refused to shop.

Pietro had to plan this through completely. In his head he was reciting the list, there was no chance he was gonna ‘borrow’ all these ingredients without getting caught. Grabbing one of the small boxes that were discarded outside of the door, Pietro took his shot, grabbing as many items as he could, throwing them carelessly into the box before dashing out, leaving a thick trail of flour.

Placing down the boxes he let himself have a moment to regain his breath.  Looking around he saw a long trail of flour all across the floor, oh well. He was sure when y/n saw what he had made for her, she wouldn’t mind a little bit of flour.

Pietro soon realised however that this was hopeless. He was terrible at baking. Shutting the oven door that was caked in eggs and flour he went over to the flour stains on the floor and began to scrub for a good 10 minutes until the smoke alarm went off startling him.

“der’mo! (Shit!)” He yelled running over to the oven and removing the cake wafting at the smoke above.  As soon as the smoke appeared his yes landed on an unimpressed y/n. “Babe, I am so sorry I was trying to make you a cake and-“ y/n cut him off with a small kiss onto Pietro’s lips.

“I think we can still make another one if you want” Pietro offered as you both began to giggle, “Do you think you can grab some chocolate powder from the kitchens?” you questioned as Pietro nodded before sprinting off. Getting to work on the flour stains by the time he was back holding a box of chocolate powder you had cleaned the floor and the counters, the oven the only thing still caked (literally).

After one or two small flour fights you and Pietro had made one kick-ass cake. One you were extremely proud of. “Come here princess” Pietro spoke wrapping his arms around your waist. “Love you” he chuckled placing a small kiss on your lips. “Love you too” you smiled cuddling into his chest as he rested his head onto yours.

3

Layer gifs of best Hannibal art

Happy holidays, everyone! Thanks for sticking around. I joined the fandom just this May and I’ve felt so welcome. Onward to a bloody new year!