Word Count: 2,025 Genre: Smut Fandoms: Negan, The Walking Dead, Jeffrey Dean Morgan Pairings: Negan x Kaitlin (Original Female Character) Rating: Explicit AO3 Link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10058558 Warnings: Language. Zombies. Heights. Cheating. Oral sex. Vaginal sex.
Summary: Requested by @kaitlinlexieporrini. Carl’s girlfriend Kaitlin narrowly escapes the walker horde at Alexandria with Negan, returning to the Sanctuary with him for a naughty rooftop fling.
Note: I realize that Carl Grimes’ age is a hotly debated topic. His sex life with Kaitlin is vaguely mentioned in this fic, but as I wrote her as being 18 years old, I am also assuming at least for the duration of this story that he is at least 18 as well.
“Fuck!” Negan cursed as he ran away from Alexandria, the once quiet town now overrun with a horde of the walking dead. Rick and company escaped from the opposite end of the main street while Negan and a young girl that he’d never met escaped through a crack in the wall near the front gate. He dragged her along simply because she was there, trying to keep her safe. They careened around the trees, branches snapping beneath their feet, keeping an eye out for walkers and managing to avoid most of them.
“Let me go!” the girl screamed. “I know who you are!”
“Look, little girl, there is no time for this shit! We can get you back to your boy Carl later on! Every moment you waste fighting me is another moment for the walkers to close in. Now come on!” Negan tightened his grip on her arm and continued leading her through the woods to the place where he parked his truck. He shoved her roughly into the driver’s seat. “I call shotgun. Literally. I’m gonna keep this rifle aimed out the window at those walkers just in case. You drive. Fast!”
“Speakin’ of movies, I’m walkin’ over to the Nightly Double tomorrow night. Anybody want to come and hunt some action?”
“How about y’all? Two-Bit? Johnnycake, you and Pony wanta come?”
“Yeah, and this time it’s for good. That little broad was two-timin’ me again while I was in jail.”
“Who’s gonna make me?”
“I know you too. I’ve seen you around rodeos.”
“You two barrel race, huh?”
“Oh, my, my. You’ve got me scared to death. You ought to see my record sometime, baby. Guess what I’ve been in for?”
“I’m never nice. Want a Coke?”
“This might cool you off.”
“Fiery, huh? Well, that’s the way I like ‘em.”
“Okay, kids, whatta ya need me for?”
“Good for you.”
“Oh, shoot, kid. I was in the bedroom.”
“Glory, but your ears can get red, Ponyboy.”
“It wasn’t anything like that, kid. I was asleep, or tryin’ to be, with all this racket. Hank Williams…Me and Shepard had a run-in and I cracked some ribs. I just needed a place to lay over. Ol’ Tim sure can pack a punch. He won’t be able to see outa one eye for a week. Well, wait a sec and I’ll see what I can do about this mess. Ponyboy, are you wet?”
“Glory, hallelujah! You’ll die of pneumonia ‘fore the cops ever get you.”
“Get that sweatshirt off. Dry off and wait here. At least Johnny’s got his jeans jacket. You ought to know better than to run away in just a sweat shirt, and a wet one at that. Don’t you ever use your head?”
“Here. The gun’s loaded. For Pete’s sake, Johnny, don’t point the thing at me. Here’s fifty bucks. That’s all I could get out of Merril tonight. He’s blowin’ his loot from that last race.”
“Pony, do Darry and Sodapop know about this?”
“Boy howdy, I ain’t itchin’ to be the one to tell Darry and get my head busted.”
“Here! It’s Bucks—you an’ him ain’t exactly the same size, but it’s dry. It’ll get cold where you’re going, but you can’t risk being loaded down with blankets.”
“Hop the three-fifteen freight to Windrixville. There’s an old abandoned church on top of Jay Mountain. There’s a pump in back so don’t worry about water. Buy a week’s supply of food as soon as you get there—this morning, before the story gets out, and then don’t so much as stick your noses out the door. I’ll be up there as soon as I think it’s clear. Man, I thought New York was the only place I could get mixed up in a murder rap.”
“Git goin’! Take care kid.”
“Glory. He looks different with his hair like that.”
“Hey, Ponyboy! Or should I say Sleeping Beauty?”
“Hold on, kid. I can’t answer everything at once. You two want to go get something to eat first? I skipped breakfast and I’m about starved.”
“Yep. Gotta cancer stick, Johnnycake?”
“The fuzz won’t be lookin’ for you around here. They think you’ve lit out for Texas. I’ve got Buck’s T-bird parked down the road a little way. Goshamighty, boys, ain’t you been eatin’ anything?”
“You’re both pale and you’ve lost weight. After this, get out in the sun more. You look like you’ve been through the mill.”
“Hey, Ponyboy. I gotta letter for you.”
“The President, of course, stupid. It’s from Soda.”
“He came over to Buck’s a couple of days ago for something and found that sweat shirt. I told him I didn’t know where you were, but he didn’t believe me. He gave me this letter and half his pay check to give you. Kid, you ought to see Darry. He’s takin’ this mighty hard…”
“Shoot, kid, them boys at the station know me by now. I get hauled in for everything that happens in our turf. While I was there I kinda let it slip that y’all were headin’ for Texas. So that’s where they’re lookin’.”
“Sure can. But don’t you kids get to pickin’ up my bad vocabulary.”
“Kid, I swear it don’t look like you with your hair all cut off. It used to look tuff. You and Soda had the coolest-lookin’ hair in town.”
“Do y’all want somethin’ to eat or not?”
“Well, I’ll give you a ride for your money.”
“Glory. You don’t need to make like every mouthful’s your last. I got plenty of money. Take it easy, I don’t want you gettin’ sick on me. And I thought I was hungry!”
“I didn’t tell y’all something. The Socs and us are having all-out warfare all over the city. That kid you killed had plenty of friends and all over town it’s Soc against grease. We can’t walk alone at all. I started carryin’ a heater.”
“Ya kill ‘em with switchblades, too, don’t ya, kid? Don’t worry, it ain’t loaded. I ain’t aimin’ to get picked up for murder. But it sure does help a bluff. Tim Shepard’s gang and our outfit are havin’ it out with the Socs tomorrow night at the vacant lot. We got hold of the president of one of their social clubs and had a war council. Yeah, just like the good old days. If they win, things go on as usual. If we do, they stay outa our territory but good. Two-Bit got jumped a few days ago. Darry and me came along in time, but he wasn’t havin’ too much trouble. Two-Bit’s a good fighter. Hey, I didn’t tell you we got us a spy.”
“That good-lookin’ broad I tried to pick up that night you killed the Soc. The redhead, Cherry what’s-her-name.”
“Yeah. She came over to the vacant lot the night Two-Bit was jumped. Shepard and some of his outfit and us were hanging around there when she drives up in her little ol’ Sting Ray. That took a lot of nerve. Some of us was for jumping her then and there, her bein’ the dead kid’s girl and all, but Two-Bit stopped us. Man, next time I want a broad I’ll pick up my own kind.”
“She said she felt that the whole mess was her fault, which it is, and that she’d keep up with what was comin’ off with the Socs in the rumble and would testify that the Socs were drunk and looking for a fight and that you fought back in self-defense. That little gal sure does hate me. I offered to take her over to The Dingo for a Coke and she said ‘No thank you’ and told me where I could go in very polite terms.”
“Man, this place is out of it. What do they do for kicks around here, play checkers? I ain’t never been in the country before. Have you two?”
“I got a cousin that lives around here somewheres. Tipped me off that it’d make a tuff hide-out in case of something. Hey, Ponyboy, I heard you was the best shot in the family.”
“That was a good idea, I mean cuttin’ your hair and bleachin’ it. They printed your descriptions in the paper but you sure wouldn’t fit ‘em now.”
“You sure you want to go back? Us greasers get it worse than anyone else.”
“The boys are worried. Two-Bit was going to Texas to hunt for you.”
“No, they didn’t. Blast it, Johnny, what do they matter? Shoot, my old man don’t give a hang whether I’m in jail or dead in a car or drunk in the gutter. That’d don’t bother me none.”
“Blast it, Johnny. Why didn’t you think of turning yourself in five days ago? It would have saved a lot of trouble.”
“Johnny. Johnny, I ain’t mad at you. I just don’t want you to get hurt. You don’t know what a few months in jail can do to you. Oh, blast it, Johnny. You get hardened in jail. I don’t want that to happen to you. Like it happened to me…”
“What for? Get back in here before I beat your head in.”
“For Pete’s sake, get outa there! The roof’s gonna cave in any minute. Forget those blasted kids!”
“Man, am I glad to see you! Those —— hospital people won’t let me smoke, and I want out!”
“Shepard came by to see me awhile ago.”
“Said he saw my picture in the paper and couldn’t believe it didn’t have ‘Wanted Dead or Alive’ under it. He mostly came to rub it in about the rumble. Man, I hate not bein’ in that.”
“Kid, you scared the devil outa me the other day. I thought I’d killed you.”
“When you jumped out of the church. I meant to hit you just hard enough to knock you down and put out the fire, but when you dropped like a ton of lead I thought I’d aimed too high and broke your neck. I’m glad I didn’t, though.”
“Uh…how’s the kid?”
“Two-Bit, you still got that fancy black-handled switch?”
“Give it here.”
“We gotta win that fight tonight. We gotta get even with the Socs. For Johnny.”
“Hold up! Hold it!”
“I was. I ain’t now.”
“Talked the nurse into it with Two-Bit’s switch. Don’t you know a rumble ain’t a rumble unless I’m in it?”
“Come on! We’re goin’ to see Johnny.”
“Hurry! He was gettin’ worse when I left. He wants to see you.”
“Look sick. I’ll say I’m taking you to the hospital, which’ll be truth enough.”
“The kid—he fell over on his motorcycle and I’m takin’ him to the hospital.”
“How would I know if he’s bad or not? I ain’t no doc. Yeah, we could use an escort.”
“I was crazy, you know that, kid? Crazy for wantin’ Johnny to stay outa trouble, for not wantin’ him to get hard. If he’d been like me he’d never have been in this mess. If he’d got smart like me he’d never have run into that church. That’s what you get for helpin’ people. Editorials in the paper and a lot of trouble…You’d better wise up, Pony…you get tough like me and you don’t get hurt. You look out for yourself and nothin’ can touch you…”
“We gotta see him. We’re gonna see him and if you give me any static you’ll end up on your own operatin’ table.”
“We won. We beat the Socs. We stomped them—chased them outa our territory.”
“They’re still writing editorials about you in the paper. For being a hero an all. Yeah, they’re calling you a hero now and heroizin’ all the greasers. We’re all proud of you, buddy.”
“Never could keep that hair back…that’s what you get for tryin’ to help people, you little punk, that’s what you get…”
Imagine you are Chibs’ Old Lady and the guys tease him about the age gap between the two of you but he shows you he is not an ‘old man’. *Smut*
Warnings: smut, language.
“Shut up,” Chibs grumbles, folding his arms across his chest defensively. The guys laughed.
“I mean,” Tig said, “I get that she likes older guys, but you’re old enough to be her grandfather!”
You knew it was an exaggeration, but you knew it pissed Chibs off nonetheless. The guys loved to make fun of the age gap between you and your Old Man and while you knew it was just fun, Chibs took it personally. You suspected it had something to do with him having already been married once but you never asked in case it caused problems.
“Yeah, how’d you land someone as young as her anyway?” Jam chimed in, “She’s, like, my age.”
You heard Chibs huff and decided now was as good a time as any to butt in.
“Chibs, we really get going, don’t you think? I still have to make us dinner and it’s getting late.” You said, placing a hand on his arm to get his attention and show your support.
He gave you a look, one eyebrow raised, that told you he knew exactly what you were trying to do. Still, he didn’t object. The two of you bid your goodbyes and rode home on your Old Man’s Harley.
“You know they’re only joking, right? They don’t really think you’re too old for me.” You told Chibs as you put a pot of water on the stove to boil. Chibs was leaning on an island bench, watching you from the other side of the kitchen.
He only hummed in response, too busy watching you bend over as you searched the refrigerator.
You were dicing up a carrot when you felt hands on your hips, followed by soft lips and scratchy stubble on your neck. You shivered and set the knife down.
“I could’ve chopped my fingers off, you know?” You said, but it came out halfhearted due to the lust that was quickly making you feel lightheaded.
“I wouldn’t let you get hurt.” Chibs mumbled into your neck.
This time it was you who hummed as you tilted your neck and leaned back on your husband. You could feel the bruise forming where your Old Man was sucking and biting at your neck. You let out a soft moan and, in return, Chibs growled lowly and spun you in his arms to smash your lips together in a fierce kiss. You gripped the back of his neck, pulling him in closer and letting his tongue slide into your mouth.
He stepped closer to you, trapping you between his hips and the bench. The felt the bench digging into your lower back but paid it no mind as you could also feel the tent in Chibs’ jeans pressing against your front. Your hands found their way into Chibs’ grey locks, tugging lightly. He reached behind you and shoved the chopping board aside, the carrots scattered, forgotten on the floor. He grasped your hips roughly, lifting you onto the bench. You spread your legs so that Chibs could come to stand between them as he kissed and nipped your neck and chest, pulling on the collar of your shirt to gain more access. (As he kissed you, you reached over to the stove and turned it off so not to burn the house down).
“I don’t care what they say,” he muttered between kisses, “I’m not too old to make you feel good.”
His hands gripped the collar of your shirt and before you could protest he pulled, buttons went flying and your shirt was ruined but you could care less; you’d worry about it tomorrow. Rough, calloused fingers toyed with your bra. He was rubbing and massaging your tits through the thin material, occasionally letting a digit or two slip in to tease your nipples.
You pushed him back (with a whine at the loss) only to push his kutte off his shoulders and pull his shirt over his head. The moment you had rid him of his kutte and shirt, you ran your hands over his chest, the small hairs tickling your pals, and then raked your nails lightly back down his pecs and stomach, stopping at the button of his jeans. Then, you removed your hands to undo the button on your own jeans instead.
“Come on then, old man,” you teased as you undid your jeans at a slow, tantalising pace, “show me what you’ve got left in you.”
Chibs gripped your wrists hard and removed them from your jeans so that he could undo them himself. He dropped to his knees in front of you. You lifted your hips up to help him drag the denim down your legs. He planted kisses along your inner thighs as the smooth skin was revealed. When he had finally rid you of your pants, he went for your underwear next. The bench was cold under you and you couldn’t help but feel slightly exposed from your position, but those thoughts left your mind the moment Chibs stood up and pushed down his own jeans, letting them pool at his ankles.
“Fuck me, old man.” You teased, tugging him closer to you and shuffling further towards him.
“I,” he said, lining his leaking tip to your entrance. He pushed in and you couldn’t contain the cry that spilled from your lips at the feeling of being so full. “Am not old.”
You didn’t get a chance to say anything more before your old man was pounding into you with all that he had. You threw your head back with a particularly loud moan and you felt yourself shudder. You felt like your whole body was on fire; his hips slapping against your thighs, your fingers tangled in his hair, his lips all over your body, every time he touched you felt hotter than the last.
“Do you like it when I take you like this?” He asked.
“God, Chibs, yes!” You moaned out but gasped when he hit your g-spot hard.
You felt your stomach tighten and you knew you were close to finishing. The way Chibs’ thrusts were losing rhythm told you he was too.
“Kiss me,” you ordered and he happily obliged.
The kiss was lazy and hard but passionate; your teeth were clashing but your tongues danced in perfect timing.
“Oh my- Chibs, I’m gonna come!” You whispered into his mouth.
He looked down at you through thick lashes, eyes clouded in desire.
“Good.” His voice was deep and rough, his accent thick. That alone was enough to send you over the edge. Your body shook as you came and you clenched around him. He kept thrusting as you rode out your orgasm, and soon he followed suit as he came inside you with a cry of your name.
He slumped and let his head rest on your shoulder as the two of you caught your breath. You hopped off the bench and put your hands on Chibs’ shoulders to steady yourself, your legs still shaky. Chibs, ever the gentleman, bent down to pick up your panties and his shirt. You thanked him when he passed them to you and slipped them on while he pulled up his own jeans.
“Sorry about your shirt, sweetheart.” He said, although he didn’t sound sorry at all.
You stood on your toes to kiss him deeply. “Do not apologise for that. That was amazing, and I, for one, will never call you old again.”
You didn’t miss the smug smile that made it’s way onto his face.
Hey guys, I know this is not ballet related and I should really make a Lolita blog, but I love and adore Lolita and Lana Del Rey, and someone asked me to explain how Lana sings about Lolita and most of her songs are literally telling the story or have to do with Lolita, and nymphet related things. So skip this if you are not interested. :) I’m going to try my best but some may be wrong or just misinterpretations so I’m sure thenymphetballerina will help me out. :) I am going to list some songs. Please pay attention to when italicize anything, it means it is a song lyric.
OFF TO THE RACES
Off to the races is one of those songs that literally, is Lana explaining the story of Lolita in her lyrics. (Remember, when I italicize, it means it’s a lyric)
My old man is a bad man but I can’t deny the way he holds my hand and he grabs me, he has me by my heart.
This could mean how yes, in the novel, Humbert could be considered a bad man, because he’s not taking a lot of things into consideration and not realizing some of what he’s doing. But the way he holds Lolitas hand, is referencing that he shows this obsessive love for her that she likes and starts to like him and take advantage in some situations.
Light of my life, fire of my loins, be a good baby do what I want
This is literally a quote out of Lolita. One of the most significant quotes is Light of my life, fire of my loins, my sin, my soul, Lolita and Lana says the first part of it. The second part could be referencing how there comes a point where she knows how Hum wants things from her, and now she wants things from him so she wants him to do what she wants.
Gimme them gold coins, gimme them coins
In the novel, Lo really wanted to get a few dollars off of Hum, she tried to do things in order to get this. Even in the end of the novel, she wanted the money so this could be referencing that.
And were off to the races, cases of bacardi chasers, chasing me all over town
In the novel, Hum was taking Lolita all over the country and they suspected that someone was chasing or following them, this is what shes referencing
Im your little scarlet scarlet, singing in the garden
Although she wasnt singing, the first time Hum saw, and fell in love with Lo, was when he saw her in the garden
My old man is a tough man but he got a soul as sweet as blood red jam
This shows how no matter what, Hum did love her and he didnt have horrible intentions, he had a good heart for lolita not knowing what was being done
Since I cant reference everything, the rest of the song says how shes crazy and misbehaving like Lo.
This song is pretty self explanitory, especially since she made a home music video of herself including SCENES FROM LOLITA! And she sings Hey Lolita Hey so this song and the home made video are pretty self explanitory.
Kissin my fruit punch lips
Reffering I guess to the amount of red lipstick she wears
Lolita took place in 1947 and 1949 rhymes and works so the dates are pretty close. So, this one has a lot so here we go.
Carry me up them stairs, Put my white socks on
I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH THAT THERE IS A SCENE IN LOLITA WHERE HE LITERALLY CARRIES HER UP THE STAIRS AND TAKES OFF HER WHITE SOCKS
this gif is that scene
You like my blue nail polish
As you can see, she is putting on nail polish ahha
The mess upstairs dont be scared
This is when Charlotte, Lolitas mother, tells Hum when hesmoving in not to mind the mess
Daddy dearest, you know how I like to take trips,
They take a so called trip all over America to get away froim the bad situations
Stop at the Kmart, Buy me my peach lip gloss, cigarettes and lollipops, mad magazines and white socks
For lollipops, Lo always had candy or gum in her mouth
When Lana says mad magazines, she always was reading these magazines in the movie. Its again self explanitory
PUT ME IN A MOVIE
Lights, Camera, Action, If he likes me takes me home
This is referencing how, Hum fell in love with Lo, started to obsess and took over her life which is how lana says takes me home
Come on you know you like little girls, you can be my daddy
In some parts, Lo teases hum and this is like shes saying to him that he likes girls her age so just do it with me, and this also refers to the age gap in the novel movie
I cant make it on my own, put me in a movie
This shows how shes still innocent and cant manage fully on her own
This one is also pretty self explanitory but the name Carmen is also referenced alot in the novel and movie so
He hit me and it felt like a kiss
Some parts Hum gets mad and paranoid and smack her but in the end he shows his love and its crazy but
FUCKED MY WAY UP TO THE TOP
Lay me down tonight, Im your favourite girl
This is where not only Humbert, but Lolita knows how much Hum loves her and she wants to do more things with him
There are so many more references but I cant do them all, theyd take too much time but even though this nothing to do with lana, I do beleive that Lolita and hum did have some real love for each other, even though everything was his responsibility
True Story: Racism at its Worst. A Response at it's Finest.
I was in an elevator inside an indoor golfing place where I stood next to three older Korean gentlemen. As the elevator ascended, I could feel the stares of the three gentleman on the back of my neck. For some odd reason, from a single glance, they assumed I wasn’t Korean and so they started to talk about me.
“God, there are so many Chinese people coming into this Golf course.”
“ Why is this one so big, he looks like one of those chinks that come through just to mess around and trash the place.”
Now if you know me, I’m not a quiet person when it comes to acts of racism even if it’s not “really” directed towards my ethnicity. But, they were old, so I cooled off on my temper and let them continue with their conversation. I was getting off soon anyways.
As we continued to go up, the elevator stopped, and a large African-American man in a suit came in with a brief case. Seemed like he came here for a meeting of some sort. The moment the elevator doors closed, you guessed it, the old men went on with their racial commentary about the man in the suit.
“Oh my God look how dark this man is.”
“I know why is he so dark? He looks weird.”
“I wonder what he’s doing here. I hate it when black people come into our area. ”
As you may or may not know, I grew up in a predominately Black neighborhood so my blood started to boil. As I clenched my fist and slowly turned to say something, I was caught off guard by something completely unexpected. The elevator stopped, the large gentleman turned around, looked towards the three old men and said in KOREAN:
“ Excuse me. I stood here and listened to everything that you said, and I am sorry that the color of my skin offends you.”
The man walked out the elevator, turned around right before the elevator door closed , and bowed.
A couple of weeks ago I had a customer come in about 20 minutes after we opened with a plastic bag…
*Customer puts the bag on the counter and stares at me*
Me: Hey! Got some trades for me?
Customer: No. I’m returning this PS3. I want my money back. It sucks.
Me: Ok, sorry you feel that way.
*I pull out the receipt from the bag*
Me: Uh, unfortunately, it’s already been three weeks since you purchased it. The return policy is only good for one week.
Customer: I was told I have a month.
Me: You have a month to exchange it out for another of the same model if there’s something wrong with the original one you purchased through us…
Customer: No. I’m returning this! I was told by the guy I bought it from that I could return it in a month if I didn’t like it!
*I look at the receipt again and see I was the one who sold it to him*
Me: Yeah, I actually was the one that sold it to you, and I would never say that. It just isn’t our policy.
*He snatches the receipt from my hand and flips it around and points to the return policy*
Customer: What does that say right there?!
Me: That says you have 7 days to return it for a full refund…
Customer: Oh, my god! This is unbelievable! Can I speak with a manager?!
Me: I’m the only manager on duty at the moment, and if another was here they would say the same thing.
Customer: This is bullshit! I demand you return this for me!
Me: I mean, the best I could do is trade it in for you. It already went past the 7 days, three times.
Customer: Wow. I guess then. Let’s just trade it in. You guys doing good? Making a bunch of money, robbing people?
*I do my best not to call the guy an asshole and kick him out of my store. I start to pull out a 160 gb slim PS3, the power cable and two off-brand wired controllers.*
Me: Yeah… do you happen to have the Sony brand controller that came with it?
Customer: No, you guys do.
Me: What do you mean?
Customer: I traded it in last week.
Me: Gotcha. I unfortunately need a Sony controller to go with it to even take it in.
*Guy starts freaking out*
Customer: YOU GUYS HAVE IT! IT’S IN YOUR BACK ROOM! GO GET IT!
Me: That’s ours now. I would need one with this system in order to take it.
Customer: BUT YOU GUYS ALREADY FUCKING HAVE IT!
Me: That controller is not a part of this transaction. You traded it in last week. That’s ours now. I need one other than that one to take your system in for trade.
Customer: Why won’t these work?
*Points to the two wired controllers*
Me: Whatever were to come with a new PS3, is what we would need to take in a pre-owned one. So, the system itself, the Sony controller, the charge cable for the controller, the power cable and the AV or HDMI cable.
Customer: I don’t even have the AV cables. It didn’t come with one when I purchased it.
Me: It had to of had either the AV cables or an HDMI cable. We don’t take them in without one. So, we wouldn’t have sold one without one.
Customer: Well, I don’t have them.
Me: What did you use to connect it to your tv?
Customer: I have an HDMI cable.
Me: Ok, well, we would either need that or you can purchase these universal cables we have for $17.99.
Customer: THAT’S MY HDMI CABLE! I BOUGHT THAT FOR ME!
Me: Yeah, I understand that, but we still need one for the system.
Customer: Jesus Christ! You rip off all of your customers?!
Me: Sir, I’m not trying to rip anyone off, I’m just doing my job.
Customer: Yeah, doing it well, too. You get commission on your sales?
Me: *Nervous chuckle* No.
Customer: Yeah, ok. So, what? I’m just screwed then?
Me: Like I said, you can bring it all back with an HDMI cable or you can purchase the AV cables we sell. And we still would need a Sony controller.
Customer: Fuck. Ok, I’ll go get the HDMI cable. I can just buy a used Sony controller, right?
Me: Sure, but… Do you have our Power Up Card?
Me: Ok, in that case the controller would be $44.99, and you’re only gonna get $35 in cash for the system.
And I had never seen a 30 year old man stomp off faster than that in my life. We’re also RIGHT next-door to a used movies/game/cd place and I watched him head in there. I knew they wouldn’t take it either. Lol And then, after about 15 minutes, he popped back in just to say “Fuck you” to me. It was quite the experience.
Summary: Imagine TFW finding out you were sexually abused and at first being really mad but then helping you through it
Warnings: sexual abuse/rape, physical abuse, cursing,
Word Count: 5595
Fic/Link to Fic:
You’d known the Winchester’s for years. John and your father hunted together on occasion, throwing you and the boys on Bobby or in a sketchy motel room for weeks at a time. Though you were a few years younger than Sam, he and Dean became your brothers. Dean taught you how to make your own sawn-off and throw knives on target and Sam gave you book after book, defining difficult words and talking about theme and plot points late into the night. Bobby took you all to the park and let you watch old movies when you were supposed to be training. John and your dad became friends and started going on hunts more and more, which was fine with you. Any time spent away from your dad was a gift.
psst can I prompt, DamiTim, maybe, with Damian trying to get Tim a proper christmas gift?
Title: My True Love Gave To Me (Part 2) Characters: Damian Wayne, Tim Drake, (background Clark Kent, Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Alfred Pennyworth) Pairing: future?timdami, implied superbat A/N: I don’t think I mentioned it in the first part, so I’ll fix that in a minute, but Damian’s like…I dunno, 19/21 in this story. Clark ships these two apparently, and wants to help them get together/be happy. I honestly didn’t mean for that to happen. The boys had their own little gift exchange, and will have one with Bruce and Clark and everyone else in a few days. Along with the books, Damian also got Jason some old/antique guns. Uh…I can’t really give you a reason as to why Clark was at the manor and Bruce isn’t. Let’s just say he’s in the shower or something.
I’ll probably lose followers for this but some of you aren’t realizing that your TC’s pursuing you aren’t men in love, they’re disgusting pedophiles. I know you don’t want to think of it that way but I get extreme anxiety reading about some situations. A 40 year old man shouldn’t like a 15 year old girl. The dynamic there is so off!
You may not realize it now, but when you’re 14/15/16 years old, you aren’t as grown up as you think. I’m 18 now and still consider myself a child. It’s just wrong in my eyes. If a man that old can’t find a woman around his age, there’s something wrong with him.
And yes, this is after I’ve given this so much thought. Age gaps are nothing to fetishize. They’re just weird in some cases. [keyword: SOME]
Edit: YOUR FEELINGS ARE VERY VALID. You can’t control who you like! I’m talking about the old men who actually act on their feelings before you’re of legal age. It’s not right.
Could I have a scenario where Midorima falls in love with a girl from his class who also enjoys astrology? thank you! c:
No problem! Enjoy! -Admin Red
They say that love is destined, like a contract written in the stars.
Those who are similar will be drawn together, and they will compliment each other naturally.
Or, y’know. It’s just a series of coincidences that mirrors “fate”.
“What do you mean, me again?” Midorima retorted hotly, turning around to face the owner of that annoying voice which rivaled even Takao’s. “I should be asking you that question.”
You crossed your arms, glaring at the tall boy in front of you, in all his ridiculousness with his green hair and old-fashioned glasses and, today, a stuffed rabbit in his bandaged hand.
“I’m here for the astrology lecture,” you answered defiantly. “Why are you here?”
“Oha-Asa decreed that today my lucky item is a laser pointer. I was unable to obtain one, until fortunately the professor leading this lecture agreed to give it to me - on the condition that I attended the session.” Midorima tipped up his glasses. “I’m not following you, if that’s what you’re thinking.”
“I didn’t say that! God, get off my case.”
“You took the words right out of my mouth.”
“Man, you two are like polar opposites, huh,” Takao commented when you stalked away, taking a seat on the other end of the classroom as far away from Midorima as possible.
Midorima scoffed. “It’s impossible to understand people like that. I can’t stand her.”
To his confusion, Takao grinned. “Sure.”
Well, Midorima said that, but then he couldn’t get you out of his head afterwards, either.
At first he’d chalked it up to your annoying attitude, but when he found himself checking your horoscope’s ranking on Oha-Asa and subconsciously looking for your lucky item as well, he realised he was in deep, deep shit.
He found himself looking behind him, scanning the rooms he entered, checking if you were there. One day he overheard some girls saying you’d fallen ill, and he found himself actually concerned.
There was only one thing Takao would say about this. That Midorima was, without a doubt, in love with you.
Really? Was fate messing with him again?
No, wait a minute. This wasn’t fate or destiny. This was him. He was the one who loved your voice, found your quirkiness amusing, wanted to protect you and make you happy.
Great, now he was getting all sappy. Good job, Shintarou. Way to go.
The question was, did you feel the same about him?
Ugh. Midorima hated it when Takao was right.
“Oh, you again. What do you want now?”
Midorima almost wrinkled his nose right there. “I got you this,” he said shortly, shoving a small piece of paper at you. You narrowed your eyes and snatched it from his outstretched hand, peering at the ink.
“A ticket to the carnival? What are you-”
“It’s not your lucky item,” Midorima interrupted, and you felt your heart quicken. “I have one as well - I was hoping you’d come with me this weekend.”
You squinted at him. “What makes you think I’ll say yes?”
Midorima’s eyelid twitched. “As a matter of fact,” he cleared his throat and pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “My lucky item today is a ticket, plus Oha-Asa predicts that your sign will be given with a choice in the coming future.”
“And I’d like to say that maybe you’d like to make that decision on your own, not based on your horoscope.”
You looked at the carnival ticket, mind working, then glanced back up at Midorima, the corner of your mouth twitching. “Sure. But I have one condition for you.”
“And what is that?”
You grinned. “You’ll come on the Ferris wheel with me?”
There’s a lot of talk (continuous and unending talk) about how inappropriate it is for a middle-aged man like Daryl Dixon to have developed feelings for a young woman like Beth Greene. A lot of speculation about how Beth would feel about it too, ranging from those of us who are pretty sure she shared his feelings, all the way down to those people who claim she would just find it creepy.
Since they shot Beth in the head and refuse to explore any of this in the narrative, we’re left to just kind of argue. Which sucks. I mean, I appreciate a certain amount of obligatory ambiguity in story telling but when they swap out legitimately interesting character exploration for overdone threads that will just be dropped in three episodes anyway, what’s the point?
A lot of people claim to be, sort of, looking out for Beth and like to say that we’re romanticizing a relationship that would obviously be pathological in real life. First of all, I don’t know how they get off “policing shippers” in the first case, even with legitimately problematic pairings.
But brushing past that for a moment. Bethyl isn’t even problematic.
I thought I would offer my own life experience up as an example of what Bethyl absolutely is not. Since some people seem confused.
When I was 17-19 years old I had a problem in the form of an older man (44) who developed a moderate case of erotomania towards me and wouldn’t leave me alone.
Placing your computer in the center of the table, you put your Pandora on a mixed station and readied yourself, looking between Sam and Dean who were already seated.
“Don’t worry, Y/N. We’ll go easy on you,” Dean smirked. “Now everyone ante up.” Poker was a little different in the bunker. You three didn’t deal with money so much so the pot ended up being a mish-mash of things like laundry duty and driving shifts on the next case, so you had a supply of paper ready and each of you had a pen to write IOUs on. Once everyone had chipped in, Dean started dealing out cards.
"Hot single dad hires broke babysitter" au, please?
“How do I know this woman again?” Hiccup stepped over a pile of megablocks on his way to the laundry room, accidentally crunching a piece underfoot and wincing.
“Astrid is Snotlout’s girlfriend’s college roommate,” Fishlegs promptly answered. “You met her at Tuffnut’s barbecue last year.”
“She’s late. She’s late so I’m late.” Hiccup clawed through the dryer for a black sock to match the one he was currently wearing. He held one to the light, squinting.
“Be real, Hiccup. You’re late because you’re terrible at managing time.”
“Be that as it may…” He muttered. “Aha!”
The doorbell rang, and he leaned against the wall as he struggled to hop to the front of the apartment and put on his sock at the same time. The sound of little feet pitter pattered on the hallway floor, and his four year old zoomed past him. “Hayden Haddock, what did I tell you about opening the door for strangers!” he shouted after his son, but it was too late. The boy was already tugging on the handle and staring up at the stranger in question.
Astrid Hofferson was supposedly a brilliant law student who was due to take her bar exam any day. She’d sounded very put together over the phone. But in his doorway, in cut-off shorts and flip flops, she looked more like a high school drop out on her way to the drug store. Her tank top was cut low– he could see the top of her blue bra peeking out. He cringed, instantly regretting allowing his cousin to arrange babysitting plans, but it was too late to go back.
“Hi,” he greeted, a little out of breath. “Hiccup Haddock.”
Astrid tilted her head at the little one at her feet, blonde ponytail swinging. “You must be my charge.” To Hiccup, she grinned and said, “Sorry I’m late. Bus was running behind schedule.”
He tried laughing it off, slipping his feet into his dress shoes. “It’s okay. I’m running behind too. Hayden– go get Toothless and camp out by the TV. I’ll be right there for hugs.”
The four year old nodded, then looked back at Astrid to say, “You can be my girlfriend,” before disappearing down the hall in search of his stuffed dragon.
The girl nodded. “In that case, I should’ve shaved my legs.”
“Don’t worry, he’s more of a boob man,” Hiccup chuckled under his breath, recalling how his son would cuddle close to any woman with breasts as an infant. Then abruptly realizing how inappropriate his comment was, he snapped his head up. “I– I’m sorry, that was– I didn’t mean–”
Astrid just twisted her mouth aside and searched the inside of her cheek with her tongue. She took an insurreptitious glance towards her chest. “Uh-huh.”
Hiccup shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I– you’re very well-endowed, I wasn’t–”
“You don’t do this often, do you?” She sighed, fixing the strap of her bag over her shoulder. “Leave him?”
He gave her a flat glance, relieved she understood his frazzled state. “No. I don’t.”
She finally stepped into the apartment, patting his shoulder a little rougher than necessary. “Don’t worry, dad of the year. I’m on the job.” Then she strode past him towards the sound of The Lion King. The fringe of her shorts teased the curve of her ass cheeks as she walked.
Hiccup took a deep breath. “Somehow, that’s not exceptionally assuring.”
Was my ex-boyfriend of a day, Edward? He was just too nice, and I’m never that nice plus he didn’t think I knew he ran a drug cartel or that fact I could bring him down in a minute if I wanted too. He walks up to us and says “Violet, you look stunning as ever. Who’s this on your arm?”
I smile and say “This is Eisuke Ichinomiya, my boyfriend.”
His eye twitches “Boyfriend…. For how long? You were my girlfriend not that long ago..”
Eisuke gives him a look “She has been my girlfriend for a while now, you need to move on. She’s mine now.”
Eisuke gives him a look and we walk away, thank god. I look at Eisuke and he says with a smirk “What woman?”
I give him a lovingly smile “Nothing, Eisuke.”
We get to the restaurant and I see Caroline and Mr. B waiting there for us. We walk up and Eisuke has his arm still tightly wrapped around me. Caroline’s face drops when she sees this but then she gets a bright happy smile when she realizes it me in his arms.
She says “Violetttt!! Omgeeee! You’re dating Eisuke?? But he was mine.”
I look at her and untangle myself from him “He started it! He wouldn’t leave me alone!”
She rolls her eyes “Okay!! I have plenty of boyfriends anyway! Sorry Eisuke you were replaced a long time ago!”
I smile at Eisuke then kiss him on the cheek “I’ll never find anyone to replace you, Eisuke.”
Mr. B then says “Come our table is ready and we have business to talk.”
Two hours later, 2 bottles of scotch and a signed paper they were done and time to act tipsy. Eisuke then says to Mr. B “Well, pleasure doing business with you, Mr. B. But it looks like I need to take home Violet, it seems like she had too much to drink.”
Mr. B laughs and says “Eisuke, please take care of Violet! She always takes care of other people before herself.”
He tries to help me but I wrap an arm around him to get support as he we walk out together. We are back in the lobby now, and I still have my arm wrapped around Eisuke and I put my head on his shoulder. His groupies in the lobby are staring with glares and hatred. When we got to the elevator, I was thinking he would push me off him but he doesn’t, I keep my head on his shoulder and he says “You’re not leaving tonight; you can leave tomorrow after you get some sleep tonight.”
I look at him as I raise my head from his shoulder and take my arm back. “Who do you think you getting bossy with Eisuke?”
He rolls his eyes “Tell me smart one, is there anyone else in this elevator who I could be talking too?”
I turn my back to him and say “You’re such an ass.”
He grabs me by my arms and pushes me up against the wall of the elevator. His face mere inches from mine and says “I didn’t quite catch that.”
I raise an eyebrow and say as I bite my lip “I’m pretty sure I called you an asshole.”
He looks at me with eyes full with lust and he then pushes himself onto me tighter against the wall and he rubs his erection against my stomach and attacks my neck and whispers into my ear “See how badly I want you.” I can’t help the moan that comes out of my mouth. He then kisses down my neck to the side of it as I put my head to the side and then he bites me hard. I push him off me, excited and mad at the same time “What the hell, Eisuke? Did you just fucking bite me?”
He looks at me and smirks “I was just claiming what’s mine” The second he says that the elevator dings and he walks out. I stand there shocked for a second but try to shake it off as I walk into the pent house. All the guys are sitting except Mamoru whose smoking, so I ignore them as I walk over to Mamoru and say “Good day, old man?”
He looks over at me and rolls his eyes “Kid, it was better than most.”
I wink at him and say “Well did you meet a lady friend, officer?”
He grunts and hands me a cigarette “No kid, we solved a case the first division was working on, now I get the next two days off.”
I light the cig and put to my mouth and say “Well congrats; you get to continue to be lazy for two days now.”
He grunts with a lazy smile “Just another day, kid.”
We chuckle as we look outside, Baba then says getting my attention to turn around “Violet, did you have a good time on your and Eisuke’s date? I know he did.”
I smile as I flick the half smoked cig out the window and start to walk over and sit next to Baba and Ota. Then say “It was quite….. Entertaining to say the least. It was the most fun; I’ve ever had on a date perse.”
Ota then says excitingly as he moves my hair from my neck “Is this the fun you were talking about?”
I glare at Eisuke and say “No, and that won’t be happening again. I can guarantee it.” I then start to laugh “You should have seen the girls in his groupies they were glaring at me so hard, that if I wasn’t a killer for a living I might be scared.”
Baba and Ota are chuckling, and Soryu then says “Before you leave, we are talking privately.”
I raise an eyebrow and smirk “What’s up with you guys telling me to do something is it that hard to ask a question? “Violet, I would like to talk to your privately before you leave tonight.” Is that hard? No.”
He then glares at me “Well we don’t have to talk privately then, sister.”
I glare at him, why won’t he give this up. I’m not his full sister, why does he care so much. Everyone takes in a deep breath and Eisuke drops his drink in his hand and the glass shatters on the floor as Baba says “Did you say sister?”
I almost wanted to pull my gun out then but the look on Eisuke was priceless. I should have got it on camera and the other guy’s faces were just as damn comical. I laugh “He’s only joking, guys.”
Soryu then says angrily “Violet, you are my half-sister. Sino confirmed it; he wanted me to know because the only reason you’re here to help Eisuke find his sister because someone helped you find me and our family. The wrong thing about this is that you have known for years now and haven’t said anything. Your 21 now and you have known since you were 18. Tell me, what stopped you from talking to me for 3 years but you talked to Sino.”
I grab the bridge of my nose and sighed, this is not how I wanted this conversation to go. “Soryu, we live two very different life styles.”
Soryu then stands up and glares at me “Tell me, how we live to different life styles? I’m a mobster and you’re an assassin. We work in the same fields.”
I look at him “Would you have believed me, if I walked up to you “Hi, I’m Violet Silent. I’m your half-sister, when your dad met my mom they had an affair and my mom got pregnant and ran to Italy and meet my so called father. But your dad is really my dad.” Would you believe me? I look nothing like your Soryu or any of your family! I look like a full American. I didn’t believe it myself until I did a blood test.”
Soryu said stubbornly “I would have… done something. It wasn’t your choice to make. You don’t think that I would have like to known that I had a half-sister for 3 years who knew about it. You are a selfish person and your reasons are bullshit.”
With the Soryu storms out the penthouse lobby door, I sit there shocked. He was right; they were my own selfish reasons why I didn’t tell him in the first reason. He deserved to know. This is why, I would be better with no family or anyone, all I do is hurt people.
Baba then breaks the silence a few minutes later after just staring at me “I can see it, you have similar face structures. You’re both almost the same height. You have the same nose. So why didn’t you tell him, Violet?”
I take a deep breath “I don’t feel like talking about this anymore, I’m going to sleep and leaving tomorrow to get Eisuke sister. Good night.” Before anyone could say anything I run upstairs and lock the door. I throw my clothes off and turn the shower on and sit at the bottom of the shower and cry.
I don’t know how long I sat there but when I was done, I felt like a prune. I got up, turned off the water and get dressed in a sports bra, undies and yoga pants. I dry my hair, as I look into the mirror I see the mark Eisuke left on me and French braid my hair and go to lie down in bed. I lay down and I fall asleep in what feels like nothing. No nightmares, nothing.
I wake up the next day it’s 11am, wow I got 9 hours of sleep! That is something. I dress in jeans, white tee shirt, leather jacket and combat boots. I take my bag and with all the stuff I will need to find Eisuke sister. I should be able to find her in 2 days, meet her in 3, explain to her on the 4 and bring her back by the 7th day if that what she wants.
I grab my bag of what I need and head out; I unlock my door and see a piece of paper attached to my door. I read it as I walk to the elevator “V, Please come to ID headquarters before you leave. –Soryu” Then it has the address written down.
I roll my eyes, sweet and short. I must say I’m surprised, I didn’t think he would talk to me till I got back. I throw my bag over my shoulder and head out.
I get to the place and show them an ID to get in and they look strangely at me. I get to the top floor and I’m stopped by a man with a scar across his face. I bow and say “Hello, I’m here to see Soryu Oh. My name is Violet.”
His eyes widen for a second and then bows and said ”Please follow me, this way Ms. Oh.”
I’m a little shell shocked to be called that, I mean. That was supposed to be my last name but it’s still weird.
He walks me to a door and says “On second please.”
He walks in and they say a few things back in fourth. Then he comes out “You may enter, if you need anything please don’t be afraid to ask.” Bows and walks away.
I walk in and see that Soryu is not by himself “Soryu, I’m-“
I stop talking and say “Hello, my name is violet.”
The one with light brown hair and a bright smile comes up cheerfully to me, bows and says “Hello princess, my name is Inui! It’s nice to meet Soryu’s sister! I will risk my life for you.”
That brings a smile to my face “It’s nice to meet you, please call me Violet. If you do that, you live would never be safe!”
He smiles a confused smile “Princess violet! I like it, and what do you mean—“
The one that looks like a younger Soryu walks over and interrupts him “Excuse him. He’s a little stupid. My name is Samejima; it’s a pleasure to meet the sister of Mr. Oh.”
I give a small smile and say “Nice to meet you, Samejima.”
Soryu then says “Leave both of you; I want to talk to my sister a moment.”
The both bow and say “Yes sir.” They both walk out. Soryu looks tense I know I’m the reason. I look at Soryu as he looks back at me I say “Soryu, I must say I’m surprised, to hear from you so soon.”
He looks at me and gives me a small smile “I realize that anything can happen in this line of work, and we both work dangerous jobs where either of our lives can be taken in a second.” He gets up and walks to me “I’m still upset and I want to know why but that can wait. I want you to know I care for you and when you get back, I hope that we can build our relationship. So much time has been wasted; I really want to get to know you.” I smile and say “That means a lot Soryu. I care for you too; when I get back we will work on it and I really want to get to know you as well, brother”
I smile and hug Soryu, he was shocked but he hugged me back and kissed me on my forehead. “Make it back safe.”
I smile “Sure thing bro, stay safe when I’m gone. You won’t have you amazing assassin sister around.”
He gives me a small smirk as I walk out the office door. I walk out the door and say goodbye to everyone. Then I’m on my way to the train station, on the way to find Eisuke sister. If only I knew finding her would be easy but getting her out of what she was in, would be the hardest mission of my life.
So I’ve decided to get off my lazy behind and start a new mini-series of oneshots based on the old TV show that goes along with the title^. It’ll be a very laid back sort of thing, updated once every few weeks or so as more of a collection of writing warm-ups than anything. but whatever the case, I hope you all enjoy<3
Natsu scoffed as he came across yet another stack of DVD’s that Gray had stuffed into the far corner of their entertainment center. The pink-haired man had spent the last half hour that he’d been awake creating a pile as he sifted through the assortment of titles, wondering when it would be the best time to contact that old show about hoarders that Levy had been addicted to back in high school.
Gray was currently out–practically living in his studio now that he was close to finishing up his latest sculpture–or else Natsu wouldn’t have dared go through his roommate’s ever-growing collection.
The young man snorted to himself as he sat cross-legged on their apartment floor, thinking that Gray was probably lying about the extra studio time. The loser was probably out buying more DVDs or raiding the dumpster of some rundown BlockBuster.
He paused only when there was a knock on the door.
“Come on in,” he called out, not bothering to get up and answer the door considering it could only be a handful of people knocking so early.
That, and because he was just feeling pretty lazy.
Part of him was actual hoping that it would be Gray at the door, who would probably flip his shit if he knew Natsu had come across his small stack of chick-flicks from the 90’s, such as Clueless and Emma–the best part was they weren’t exactly in mint condition either. Gray had watched the shit out of Clueless.
He heard the front door opening and his shoulders slumped briefly when he registered the sound of boots click-clacking over the tile. Definitely not his roommate, which would mean-
“Hey, Juvia.” He called over his shoulder, not bothering to check if he was right or not. Levy didn’t wear boots, and it was too early for Lucy to be ready for anything, which left only the dark blue-headed girl.
“Good morning, Natsu.” There was a rattling behind him as Juvia began to help herself in the kitchen, the rattling soon followed by a soft hiss as she began the coffee pot. “Is Gray here?”
“Nah,” Natsu shook his head, still concentrating as he went through the DVD’s. He had initially just wanted something to watch after being disappointed with what Netflix had to offer, but when he had discovered just how much of a movie junkie Gray was, he’d become intrigued.
He’d known the asshole since he was six, back when the only ice sculpting his friend was capable of was what came from an ice tray–though, Natsu had to admit that the batman ice cubes had been pretty cool back then…
They had both since moved on to greater things. Their ice was now in the shape of a shark fin, and floated to the top of whatever beverage like an actual shark would which was way cooler than any bat signal.
“A couple of weeks ago - on Facebook - I was complaining about walking to my mailbox, which is located on a busy street in Gainesville, Fla. Nine out of the 10 times that I walk to my mailbox, I am harassed or "cat called.” Immediately the first thing I am asked is, “what am I wearing?” And that question pisses me off because it shouldn’t matter what I’m wearing, men should have more respect for women. And while I already fit your typical demographic - 25-years-old/ light skin/ petite/ brunette - it’s true, men feel that for whatever reason, they can speak, no scream, inappropriate obscenities to women “like me.” So, here I am sharing my story with you and submitting my picture.
“The most recent case was, walking to my mailbox around 6 p.m. Because of day light savings time, it gets darker around 6 and as I was checking the mail a man from a truck yelled, and I mean yelled loud enough to scare me right out of my own skin, "hey bitch, let’s fuck. Fuck me bitch.” I ignore the men but it scares me because if I make them angry, like react and flick them off, potentially, they could follow me into my house - I mean, they know where I live, literally. So I just ignore them and scurry back inside. It’s so upsetting though.
“I don’t have an ounce of makeup on and I’m covered from head to toe.”
Submission from Michelle Manzione
“But What Was She Wearing?” is a project documenting what street harassment really looks like. Submit your own to firstname.lastname@example.org or via tumblr.